Don’t forget old VHS copies of Rechov Susum/Shalom Sesame, the israeli version of Sesame Street that some Hebrew schools showed their classes. [Scary thought: Joyce’s mom probably never let her kids see Sesame Street.]
JR
My childhood is in these comments and I don’t like it.
Carla's #2 Fan
Let’s add in the Veggie Tales Purim!
Delavan
See, now this is the ecumenical approach that Joe-yce dreams of.
It’s a cheap and mostly bad kid’s cartoon that seemed like an appropriate reference point for what I had assumed about Dexter and Monkey Master.
Cholma
Do you mean Johnny Quest? (that’s an oldoldold cartoon)
(quick search later)
Oh. Oh… I *think* I’ve seen images of that kid and the dog, but never saw the show itself. Did this come out around the same time as Kim Possible?
Yumi
Yes but no. Yes in that there was overlap in the timelines they were aired, no in that the few years difference of it starting meant it was not significant to my childhood, which is of course the metric we all use.
clif
Ah yes, the standard Yumi.
I understand there’s a complex formula for converting to the less used traumas per child-year.
Thag Simmons
It’s very obviously named after Johnny Quest, so the confusion is understandable.
Taffy
The show was fine until whatever change occurred that made them switch to shitty Flash animation. It looked decent in the first season, not award-winning or anything, but passable. Then something snapped and the show turned into nothing but shrieking garbage. I used to look forward to watching it, right up until I noticed the newer episodes were designed to piss me off.
clif
Hm.
If you were given a big Hollywood budget to create a TV series, but the requirement was that it had to be specifically designed to piss one particular person off, who would you choose for that person?
Taffy
I’d probably go for whichever dipshit clown was responsible for that hack-ass Velma show, because they fucked with Scooby-Doo! and I can’t imagine being so detached from humanity that you have to make something so mean-spirited out of a generally wholesome, inoffensive series. Call it boring or whatever, but I can’t stand it when somebody gets their hands on something that’s designed to be a little bit of lighthearted fun and their first instinct is to make it mean and hateful.
So yeah, fuck that project lead in particular. I wanna find out what they find charming and fun, and then completely fucking ruin it for them.
She’s just dealing with religious trauma.
Me, for example. I keep a list of pentecostal services videos, those that are people screaming, jumping, etc.
Was shopping this week and saw the toy aisle at the Asheville Marshalls, which has an abundance of action-figure scale police cruisers…and it prompted a rethink of the chase sequence on my Dumbing of Age Wishlist. (Fanworks are not obligations. To be continued…)
DRAMATIS PERSONAE (and vehicles, based on what I’ve done with diecast so far):
* Jennifer, driving Asher’s motorcycle, with a passenger behind her (who isn’t Asher!)
* Sal driving her own bike, also with a passenger (probably Joyce)
* Amazi-Girl in her Amazi-Kart, with two passengers hanging on the sides of the roll bar next to her (possibly Dina and Becky, but just as likely to be Marcie and Malaya)
* the vehicle they’re pursuing
* city cop cars
* bystander traffic
My modus operandi is a quasi-remake of some of my favorite anime chase sequences.
Truck-kun has its own Wiki page(s). Seriously, this is the main page and there are like two more Google pages of listings for other individual Truck-Kun. https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Truck-kun
– I’m inviting my boyfriend over mom, we’re just gonna *wink* Netflix & chill!
– Not in my house you filthy perverted babylonian–
– Oh sorry i meant *wink* Hymmel & chill!
– oh, indeed, how fun, you have my entire blessing with regards to this most christian form of entertainment, do keep it down, will you?
– I’ll try mom *wink*
– aaaah to be young again *wistful smile*
Hymmel the Humming Hymnal is **not** a giant talking Bible. He’s a hymnal. Unlike Psalty the Singing Songbook, who is a psalter. So you can guess what this means for Brelvis the Burbling Breviary.
139 thoughts on “Free agent”
Ana Chronistic
“We’re just skipping this specific one with Walk—I MEAN NOBODY IN IT”
will they then do a date night reading the Torah, or
MM
Nah, Joe’s weird formative religious memories probably involve Debbie Friedman songs and Birthright travelogues on Israel.
EAG46
Don’t forget old VHS copies of Rechov Susum/Shalom Sesame, the israeli version of Sesame Street that some Hebrew schools showed their classes. [Scary thought: Joyce’s mom probably never let her kids see Sesame Street.]
JR
My childhood is in these comments and I don’t like it.
Carla's #2 Fan
Let’s add in the Veggie Tales Purim!
Delavan
See, now this is the ecumenical approach that Joe-yce dreams of.
Delavan
As a Reform convert and former temple admin… this both seems accurate and hurts my soul. Can we just have Debbie without the Birthright please?
milu
I hear there’s some spicy bits
clif
The indents are confusing. Spicy bits in the Torah or the Debbie Friedman songs?
Opus the Poet
Yes, songs of Solomon, and Debbie Friedman songs.
Wraithy2773
…Joyce, you’re an Atheist now, you’re allowed to watch good television.
Please start watching good television.
Thag Simmons
Is Dexter and Monkey Master supposed to be a good show? Like where is it on a scale from like Spongebob to Johnny Test.
Schpoonman
…Where is Spongebob on that scale?
Thag Simmons
It’s in the upper range, Spongebob’s a decent kid’s cartoon, at least in my memory.
Schpoonman
Gotcha, your ordering had me about to break out the Anchor Arms.
Jo_cubstar
I don’t know what Johnny Test is…
Thag Simmons
It’s a cheap and mostly bad kid’s cartoon that seemed like an appropriate reference point for what I had assumed about Dexter and Monkey Master.
Cholma
Do you mean Johnny Quest? (that’s an oldoldold cartoon)
(quick search later)
Oh. Oh… I *think* I’ve seen images of that kid and the dog, but never saw the show itself. Did this come out around the same time as Kim Possible?
Yumi
Yes but no. Yes in that there was overlap in the timelines they were aired, no in that the few years difference of it starting meant it was not significant to my childhood, which is of course the metric we all use.
clif
Ah yes, the standard Yumi.
I understand there’s a complex formula for converting to the less used traumas per child-year.
Thag Simmons
It’s very obviously named after Johnny Quest, so the confusion is understandable.
Taffy
The show was fine until whatever change occurred that made them switch to shitty Flash animation. It looked decent in the first season, not award-winning or anything, but passable. Then something snapped and the show turned into nothing but shrieking garbage. I used to look forward to watching it, right up until I noticed the newer episodes were designed to piss me off.
clif
Hm.
If you were given a big Hollywood budget to create a TV series, but the requirement was that it had to be specifically designed to piss one particular person off, who would you choose for that person?
Taffy
I’d probably go for whichever dipshit clown was responsible for that hack-ass Velma show, because they fucked with Scooby-Doo! and I can’t imagine being so detached from humanity that you have to make something so mean-spirited out of a generally wholesome, inoffensive series. Call it boring or whatever, but I can’t stand it when somebody gets their hands on something that’s designed to be a little bit of lighthearted fun and their first instinct is to make it mean and hateful.
So yeah, fuck that project lead in particular. I wanna find out what they find charming and fun, and then completely fucking ruin it for them.
Needfuldoer
Here’s everything you need to know.
Casi
I was certain of what that would be before i clicked it, and i was not disappointed in my clairvoyance.
Random832
I’d always assumed it had like an Invader Zim vibe to it
Twitcher
My headcanon voice for Head Alien has always been Richard Horvitz.
Casi
Head Alien and Alpha 5 don’t look that much different after all…
NGPZ
I think Twitcher was referencing Zim’s voice :p
And yeah according to the Dexter bonus comic that came out around 2020, yeah very much Zim vibes ???
Roborat
Except of course, that Zim was cartoon brilliance, and Test was very much not.
Reltzik
You’re also allowed to watch bad religion television ironically.
Dana
By Bad Religion television do you mean the video for “21st Century Digital Boy”?
khn0
I hope so.
Opus the Poet
Is there any other classification for religious TV besides “bad”?
Roborat
Very bad, horrendously bad, and quick Mabel, nuke the television.
NGPZ
yeah, the same way that Becky ironically listens to “Go, And Sin No More” ✌️?
Amós Batista
She’s just dealing with religious trauma.
Me, for example. I keep a list of pentecostal services videos, those that are people screaming, jumping, etc.
Alaric
Aw, come on. Everyone’s allowed to have fond, nostalgic memories of horrible shows they watched as children. Even atheists.
NGPZ
Isn’t that the show that gets her weirdly horny? ✌️?
jackiedu46k
Maybe that’s just walky’s fault.
No wait, that’s a parallel universe!
DarkoNeko
Well it should be !
DarkoNeko
Something something Hymmel and chill
Chaucer59
Absolutely. Let us make it so. The Humming part is easy enough.
Thag Simmons
Has Joe gazed upon the horror yet?
Stephen Bierce
Was shopping this week and saw the toy aisle at the Asheville Marshalls, which has an abundance of action-figure scale police cruisers…and it prompted a rethink of the chase sequence on my Dumbing of Age Wishlist. (Fanworks are not obligations. To be continued…)
Stephen Bierce
DRAMATIS PERSONAE (and vehicles, based on what I’ve done with diecast so far):
* Jennifer, driving Asher’s motorcycle, with a passenger behind her (who isn’t Asher!)
* Sal driving her own bike, also with a passenger (probably Joyce)
* Amazi-Girl in her Amazi-Kart, with two passengers hanging on the sides of the roll bar next to her (possibly Dina and Becky, but just as likely to be Marcie and Malaya)
* the vehicle they’re pursuing
* city cop cars
* bystander traffic
My modus operandi is a quasi-remake of some of my favorite anime chase sequences.
clif
Don’t forget the large truck going the opposite direction.
Opus the Poet
Truck-kun has its own Wiki page(s). Seriously, this is the main page and there are like two more Google pages of listings for other individual Truck-Kun.
https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Truck-kun
DailyBrad
If Joe’s allowed to make fun of it, he might get something out of it. He isn’t opposed to dunking on fundie christians, as we’ve seen.
Still, this would be a hell of an unusual “first kiss as a couple” story.
JA
I mean hey, we don’t choose what makes us horny.
Yotomoe
I mean, Chastity Churchmouse can get it.
AlaninDC
Haha, yeah… he is gonna laugh so hard when he sees that huge padlock on her costume
Nono
I mean, Becky’s Pavlovian horniness comes from a song she played to stop the horniness at first.
milu
Maybe Joyce has a similar history with HtHH. Horny bad, watch wholesome show to purify mind; oopsie now mind think horny = HtHH
Proxiehunter
HtHH = Hymmel the Horny Hymnal.
Yotomoe
Ah yeah, Hymmel and Chill.
milu
– I’m inviting my boyfriend over mom, we’re just gonna *wink* Netflix & chill!
– Not in my house you filthy perverted babylonian–
– Oh sorry i meant *wink* Hymmel & chill!
– oh, indeed, how fun, you have my entire blessing with regards to this most christian form of entertainment, do keep it down, will you?
– I’ll try mom *wink*
– aaaah to be young again *wistful smile*
Nono
What if instead of being a Transformers nerd in this fandom, Joe becomes a HtHH nerd
AbacusWizard
“Joe, come to bed!”
“I can’t! I have to update the Hymmel the Humming Hymnal wiki!”
Nejireon
This girl needs to improve her media intake. Someone should show her Kuuga or something.
Nono
Well, Ethan showed her Transformers and Dexter and Monkey Master.
SDRainbow
pretty sure walky showed her dexter and monkey master
Nono
Joyce was ready to watch it with Ethan, and then Walky sprung up with his obsessive roadmap. So she would have watched it without Walky.
Sirksome
I wonder if they’ll bang with a giant talking bible show playing in the background? Hymmel is watching you, Joyce.
Laura
A hymenal hymnal!
milu
That’s hot
Freezer
Would that be better or worse than Aaron and Kendra over at “Nineteen Ninety Something” banging to The Simpsons?
clif
Yes.
Thomas
Hymmel the Humming Hymnal is **not** a giant talking Bible. He’s a hymnal. Unlike Psalty the Singing Songbook, who is a psalter. So you can guess what this means for Brelvis the Burbling Breviary.
Opus the Poet