454

Puppy
Posted on August 28, 2016 by David M Willis

454 thoughts on “Puppy”

  1. miados

    well i guess people cant say that her and sal arent even together at the same time after this

    1. garaden

      Huh? They appeared together a while ago.

      1. miados

        i was thinking about how billie still thinks they are the same person

        1. John

          Billie’s not here to see this, is she?

        2. LimeSheep

          daisy is. its gonna be in the newspaper.

        3. John

          Like Billie reads the newspaper.

        4. Kei

          Isn’t she a Journalism major?

        5. Spack

          You’d think those would go together, but it ain’t necessarily true.

        6. John

          She just writes it, she doesn’t have to read it.

          (Actually I’m not sure she even writes anything anymore. I don’t think we’ve seen Billie involved with the IDS since Daisy gave the Amazi-Girl story to Dorothy.)

        7. Ellegos

          I had a friend and eventual roommate in college who was a journalism major. He didn’t really care about current events that much. He just took the major because he wanted to do sports journalism.

        8. LimeSheep

          im several days late but i can confirm billie keeps up on the news.
          the school paper *probably* counts http://www.dumbingofage.com/2016/comic/book-6/02-that-perfect-girl/cnn/

      2. Mr. Random

        http://www.dumbingofage.com/tag/amazi-girl+sal/

        1. LazerWulf

          I see your link, and I raise you http://www.dumbingofage.com/tag/amazi-girl+sal+billie/ which returns zero results, but I know the three-tag link works because I can do this http://www.dumbingofage.com/tag/amazi-girl+sal+amber/

        2. a snow ʍousɐ

          Meyzer Wolfsheim?

        3. a snow ʍousɐ

          idk
          The pun got less good when I realized the character’s name was Meyer, not Mazer.
          Could have sworn there was a Mazer Wolf character in some classic book, but I must have been a bit mistaken

        4. venomlash

          You may be thinking of Mazer Rackham from Ender’s Game, or of Lazar Wolf from Fiddler on the Roof.

        5. legobil

          These links might be considered future spoiler material for future readers 😉

    2. Tom T.

      It’s one of Amazi-Girl’s robot doubles.

      1. Orion Fury

        I think Squirrel Girl would beg to differ.

      2. AngelBadman

        Ypu beat me to it 🙂

    3. nobodybasically

      Sometimes Superman dresses up as Amazi-Girl so people don’t realize she and Sal are never around at the same time.

      1. Tom T.

        And sometimes he does it just to feel pretty.

        1. Dara

          <applause>

        2. miados

          are you saying he doesn’t look pretty normally?

        3. SgtWadeyWilson

          In that outfit? Puh-lease, maybe if it was a bit more purple though, and paired with a necklace, preferrably one with a large rock.

        4. miados

          hopefully not a green rock.

        5. SgtWadeyWilson

          *Looks down at my Bizarro #1 t-shirt.* Actually…

        6. Ozzi

          Or to try and make batman look at him the way he does at batman.

        7. Needfuldoer

          But Batman loves him a criminal…

        8. Snekwitch

          Ooooh, is that why you want to put Superman in green and purple?

    4. TheAnonymousGuy

      August 2016 – amazi-girl caught by her self perceived arch nemesis. No capes

      1. miados

        based on how often and the intensity of the fights i would say toe dad is her arch nemesis

        1. TheAnonymousGuy

          do you at least know what I’m referencing?

        2. Whirlwitch

          NO CAPES!

        3. miados

          one cape?

        4. Woobie

          Edna says no.

        5. Geneseepaws

          Edna Mode, …… (Machine guns: Click, click, click) and friend.
          (Machine guns stand down.)

        6. darkoneko

          no. cape.

        7. Screwball

          NO CAPES!!

        8. Willoughby Chase

          To cape it all off, Mothman agrees!

        9. Disloyal Subject

          ToeDad was a single encounter, albeit a grueling and near-fatal one, and he lost it.
          Sal has been a recurring “villain” in Amazi-girl’s career.

    5. Joe

      But who’s gonna tell Billie? Marcie, Sal’s friend who would clearly help her keep her cover?

  2. Doctor_Who

    Sal just ruined the rally. The Amazi-Balloons weren’t supposed to drop until the end.

    1. Nono

      Wait do the balloons refer to her breasts, or her butt?

      1. Reltzik

        Maybe they’re a bunch of Amazi-balloons lumped together?

      2. a4lbi

        Yes.

      3. chalmskin

        Must it? Gross.

        1. Deanatay

          A gross is a LOT of Amazi-balloons.

      4. darkoneko

        Yes.

      5. Willoughby Chase

        I thought Marcie’s were about to Zeppelin her over the crowd …

    2. motorfirebox

      I didn’t think the Amazi-balloons would drop until she was at least 40. HEYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO

  3. Ana Chronistic

    SPEAKING OF BOOBS

    is it fall yet?

    1. Orion Fury

      Damn it, I don’t get the reference.

      1. LeslieBean4Shizzle

        I believe it’s an Incredible’s reference. The costume designer has a motto: no capes! Because capes get caught on things, like nuclear missiles and get turbines, causing the heroes wearing them to have horrible, untimely deaths. Thus she won’t make any costume involving a cape.

      2. Bicycle Bill

        From the movie “The Incredibles” —
        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Jy2YhxXn7NY

      3. Ana Chronistic

        well she didn’t have a nice trip, so I just used the Daria movie name

        1. Orion Fury

          Ah, thank you. I don’t believe I’ve see ‘The Incredibles’. Well, at least all of it. And Daria never really crossed my TV viewing habits (MTV, right?).

        2. HeySo

          I’m still waiting on the sequel.. Incredibles 1 came out in 2004, Incredibles 2 has gotten bumped forward to the point where it isn’t planned till 2019.
          And we all know how well those long put-off sequels do with actually getting released.. 🙁

          Still.. fingers crossed. :X

        3. Spencer

          Finding Dory seems to be doing well.

          I never saw it, but it’s Pixar and the infernal magicks they sow into the creation of their black arts doesn’t seem to be running out yet.

          Unless it’s Monsters University jfc

        4. Needfuldoer

          Problem is, the longer a project is delayed the longer the fan community has to raise their expectations higher than the final product can realistically meet.

          Look at Duke Nukem Forever; on its own it’s an okay game, but it was delayed and teased for over a decade, giving fan speculation time to snowball. When it finally launched it underwhelmed the hardcore fans, and the general public only heard negative things about it from them. Even if it was incredible in every way, some fans would still be disappointed that it didn’t have everything they wanted.

          Valve faces this same problem with the next installment of Half-Life, Cartoon Network will when they finish Samurai Jack, and Pixar will with their long-delayed sequels. Can they pull it off? Probably, unless we set the bar impossibly high.

        5. Sam

          In the case of Incredibles 2 it hasn’t teased purposely for over 10 years though at least – a lot of people stopped expecting it at all when it wasn’t mentioned and so the build up will only be around 3-5 years which is more of an acceptable level.

          Also, it won’t have started to be made in 2004 and only finish in 2019 as well which was a big part of the problem with Duke Nukem Forever – it started being created in 1996, went into development hell, and by the time they were out of it, graphics and technology had moved on by leaps and bounds so everything about it was outdated by the time it released.

  4. EvilMidnightLurker

    Not many people can pull off the Reverse Batman.

    1. Reltzik

      Much less pull a Reverse Batman off a ledge.

      1. TSM ZeRo

        Reverse Batman off a ledge into a RAR Back Air into an L-Canceled Side B into a wavedash upsmash into a short hop forward air into a grab into an up throw-up air. True combo.

        1. WhoWasI

          Degree of difficulty 17.8. Too bad she didn’t stick the landing.

        2. SgtWadeyWilson

          C-C-C-COMBO BREAKER!

        3. Disloyal Subject

          For shame, Wade.

        4. SgtWadeyWilson

          What? No seriously, what shame?

  5. AnvilPro

    Sal’s gonna get Marcie fired, showing how much better she is at guarding the rally

    1. Shiro

      Tbf, AG probably didn’t mean any harm to the rally. Sal herself, on the other hand…

      1. Orion Fury

        Ah, drinking the Amza-Kool-Aid?

      2. Doctor_Who

        No way Robin is cool with something taking all the attention away from her at her rally.

        Unless that something is a frigging superhero fight! Break out the kiddie pool full of pudding!

        1. Reltzik

          There is such a thing as bad publicity.

          …. that would be publicity that someone else gets.

        2. Seerow

          But this is publicity being given to her rally by a super hero fight. As long as it’s coming to her rally and not to her political opponents I think she is coming out ahead here.

          What I’m saying is, bring on the kiddie pool!

      3. Fart Captor

        Sal was totally safe. If Amber were ready to pounce, she’d have been waiting above a skylight.

    2. AngelBadman

      Marcie is going to be conflicted, Sal is starting a fight. Amazi-Girl was sitting quietly.

      1. Fart Captor

        AG is a masked vigilante who has physically attacked them before, without provocation, and who was just now sneaking up on them, in a way that really makes it seem like she may have been about to attack them again.

        I don’t think Marcie is going to feel conflicted at all. At least not yet.

    3. Mara

      Fire Marcie?
      She did a great job spotting that villain, distracting her with chatting to a friend, and then bringing her down in one moment!
      Oh, wait, her friend did that?
      Never mind. Both get a medal for saving a congress woman from a masked attacker.

      Sal’s parents will be proud of her, her father will stop criticizing her hair, Amber will get therapy, everyone will be happy ever after
      – at least till Monday morning, when reality ensues.

  6. Minder

    SMACKDOWN

  7. Mr. Mendo

    Well, Sal/Amazi-Girl just shot to the top of everyone’s slash-fic pairings…

    1. Nono

      You kidding? The way Sal complimented Marcie’s knockers…

      1. 6Qubed

        threesome. the answer is always a threesome

        1. Mr. Mendo

          You would THINK that, but…ah well, that’s just one of those mistakes everyone *needs* to make at least once. 😉

        2. Passive Destroyer

          Foursome, Sal, Marcie, Amazi-Girl, Robin, and Roz.
          Oh wait, that’s five, so they could make a DeSanto sandwich.
          MMMMM…. sandwiches…

        3. Pl0x

          Plus Leslie and Daisy, because they are two sexually frustrated ladies, so they should be let in to the orgy.

      2. Orion Fury

        But if no light can escape, then how can we see them?

        1. Doctor_Who

          They emit Hawking radiation. We just need special goggles that can detect electromagnetic radiation of those wavelengths.

          Maybe that’s what Marcie’s goggles do. She needs them, or she wouldn’t be able to see her own boobs, which would be inconvenient.

          She should get Malaya a pair. Then she’d be all “Damn, those are some nice knockers.”

        2. Orion Fury

          Sounds convenient. Though how does Sal see them then? Did she try on Marcie’s glasses once, and was so astounded by the sight to have had them permanently seared into her memory?

        3. HeySo

          It’s Sal. Sal does whatever the eff she wants, and damn the rules.

      3. Cerberus

        Yeah, that was my first thought. With the way she complimented her boobs, I’m wondering if the Sal is 100% straight theory is not actually correct.

        1. Nono

          She lost her virginity at Catholic school.

          I’m not 100% if the school was single-sex but it wouldn’t surprise me.

        2. Cerberus

          That’s… yeah, those tend to be very sex-segregated. Huh, there might actually be something to this theory.

        3. Emily

          Though Sal is the last person on Earth I’d expect to respect the rules enforcing that segregation. It’s not like there’s a magical barrier preventing boys from entering the grounds.

        4. LazarusLong

          or preventing Sal from batman-ing it out a window and across campus to the boys dor.

        5. Spencer

          Word of Willis is that Sal learned to climb out of windows so she could go see boys.

        6. Disloyal Subject

          I believe we discussed the possibility at length when they played Apples to Apples at Joyce’s party, but data has been vague.
          With Sal’s mad window-exiting skills, she may have had access to both genders, but that doesn’t really narrow it down.

        7. Nightsbridge

          Willis actually explicitly said that her losing her virginity had a lot to do with her escaping through windows to get away from that sex-segregation though.

        8. Dave

          If she isn’t straight, it’s still probably safe to say that she doesn’t have a thing for Marcie. No way that she’s going to realize she’s attracted to women now after all that time in an all-girl boarding school.

        9. thejeff

          It’s possible to be aware of someone’s attractive features without actually being attracted by them.

    2. Coco Pommel

      Foe-Yay?

      1. Mr. Mendo

        The BEST kind of Yay! 😉

        1. Orion Fury

          Is there a bad kind?

        2. miados

          give me a full list and ill determine if there are or are not any bad kinds.

        3. Orion Fury

          I barely just survived TvTropes, I ain’t going back there for that right now.

        4. miados

          and thus proves that when someone asks you to do work agree but ask them for work before you can do so and you will usually be able to avoid the work asked of you.

        5. Orion Fury

          It was a hypothetical. Or is it rhetorical? Theoretical…

        6. Disloyal Subject

          I think one of the Incest pages is filed as a Yay.

        7. Orion Fury

          And there’s your answer. My answer? The answer to the stated question, by me?

        8. Whirlwitch

          Fluttershy Yay is best Yay.

        9. Disloyal Subject

          AVAST!

  8. Doopyboop

    Holy shit

  9. MatthewTheLucky

    NO CAPES!

    1. Reflex76

      That didn’t take long.

      1. Doctor_Who

        To be fair, 12:03 is probably longer than Willis thought it would take.

        Okay, who had 12:03 in the betting pool?

        1. Reltzik

          …. I didn’t set up the betting pool. Did you set up the betting pool?

        2. Orion Fury

          There was a betting pool? I’ll put 5 on red.

        3. SgtWadeyWilson

          I always have trouble choosing between red and black. They just go so well together, especially on a pool.

          Sorry, that was terrible, but it was right there.

        4. Orion Fury

          True. I was going to go with black at first, but it read as racist to me.

        5. Reltzik

          Wow, talk about your dead fashions.

        6. SgtWadeyWilson

          Drop-dead gorgeous, you mean.

        7. Doctor_Who

          Turns out we gave that job to Robin, and she set up a pudding pool instead.

          But it looks like we have a fight on our hands, so let’s call it serendipity.

        8. No Name

          If you count Ana’s alt-text, it’s 12:01.

    2. miados

      unless they are on velcro so they can be easily removed. if i remember right they were used in comics so there was extra ways to show movement.

      1. Orion Fury

        Or easy tear away.

    3. Peny

      Oh, THERE’S the joke. I knew I couldn’t have been the first one to post it.

    4. John

      I am so, so sick of people parroting that.

      Capes are actually really useful, both defensively and offensively, if you know what you’re doing with them. There’s a reason matadors use them, and they’re way up there on the list of “things Jackie Chan will kick your ass with and leave you wondering how that just happened”. The Edna Mode objection can pretty much be nullified just by making them tearaway.

      And Amazi-Girl knows what she’s doing with a cape.

      1. MatthewTheLucky

        Except she didn’t do her homework and now she’s lying on the ground in front of her enemy with the breath knocked out of her.

        1. MatthewTheLucky

          Really, unless you have some fictional element lining, a cape is not effective in any fight but a fistfight, and as Sal has just demonstrated, it can be used against the owner very easily.

        2. Disloyal Subject

          There are whole martial arts based around the use of a sarong as a weapon, and while to my (very limited) knowledge on the subject suggests that they’re mainly defensive, a cape is moderately similar.
          That, and John tends to know what he’s talking about.

        3. Ozzi

          Actually you are wrong. The phrase cloak and dagger is based on a fighting style where a cloak is used as an entrapping device for weapons and unarmed combatants.

        4. MatthewTheLucky

          There are also far more effective and easy to learn fighting styles that would make more sense for Amber. The question isn’t “do capes have a theoretical use for a specially trained martial arts master?” it’s “was this a good idea for a self-taught vigilante?”

        5. John

          Really, no. They’re portable concealment and useful for all kinds of misdirection. Even against an opponent with a gun, if they’re shooting at the cape, they may well not be shooting at where you actually are behind it (and ideally you’re deliberately moving the cape and your body so as to mislead them about where behind it you actually are). Not even being where they’re shooting is a better defense against bullets than omg bulletproof cape comic-book materials engineering.

          They turn into nets or ropes in a pinch, with all sorts of uses for controlling or even attacking your enemy and/or his weapon – and utility applications beyond that. It’s surprisingly difficult to get your weapon free when a big piece of stout fabric has been wrapped loosely around your weapon hand. Even if your weapon is a blade, you can’t just cut your way out… it tends to just move with your hand and blade and deny you the resistance you need to cut it. And you can use it for joint locks or even as a garotte.

          Amazi-Girl’s, though it’s not really apparent from the way Willis draws it, is weighted at the bottom (with her civilian shoes), and we’ve seen her use that to knock things out of people’s hands.

        6. Reltzik

          I think that was more of a surprise thing.

          Also, she didn’t land right to have the breath knocked out of her. She’s probably just got bruises and maybe a broken bone or sprain or five.

        7. MatthewTheLucky

          Regardless of whether it was a surprise, Sal couldn’t have pulled it off without the cape, nor would she have noticed Amazigirl in the first place.

        8. Disloyal Subject

          We might not have noticed, but Sal still could have seen her moving off-panel.

        9. MatthewTheLucky

          No, you can see her notice the cape as it flutters here.

        10. Disloyal Subject

          Yes, I can. And if she weren’t wearing it, Sal still might have noticed her anyway.
          She wears bright yellow, for crying out loud.

      2. Disloyal Subject

        I wonder how much Amber’s shoes and stuff weigh… since they effectively turn her cape into a weighted cape, radically changing its applications as a weapon.

        1. Needfuldoer

          Amazon puts the shipping weight for heavy gloves, a boiler suit, utility belt, and a pair of womens boots at around 20 pounds. That includes packaging, but she’s probably making up for it with gadgets.

        2. DSL

          There are also the street clothes that are part of the Amber disguise, worn either over or under the Amazi-suit.

  10. Reltzik

    SUDDENLY DEATHMATCH.

    1. inqntrol

      “Plays the Mortal Kombat theme song on the hacked Muzak.”

      1. Orion Fury

        Saying “Get Over Here!” or “Finish Him!” feels too obvious.

        1. Tacos

          How about “Toasty!” then?

        2. Orion Fury

          Eh, I’ve heard worse.

        3. Chief_of_Staves

          Willis has already ruled out “FATALITY.”

        4. Orion Fury

          True.

        5. Deanatay

          Babality.

        6. SgtWadeyWilson

          “Huahahahaaha! Don’t make me laugh!” -Shao Khan

        7. Orion Fury

          Fits, Mr. Pool.

        8. SgtWadeyWilson

          Thanks, but I just go by “Wadey,” mainly because nobody listens when I ask to be called “Sarge.”

        9. Orion Fury

          I never heard you ask for that. Maybe people associate it with Slaughter?

        10. SgtWadeyWilson

          Ehh… It was a while ago on the Spinnerette comment section(Back when it was one of those, and still WordPress at that.) where I originally started using this username. Here I let people believe I was RPing DP because it’s conveniently funny when Doctor Who is doing the similar thing.

          As for the Sarge bit though, maybe, but drop the ‘S’, because I’m Sgt. Laughter.

        11. Orion Fury

          I read it, never really joined in (and a woof on the current storyline). I do like this comment section. Alright then. So is it Mr. Sarge, or just Sarge?

        12. SgtWadeyWilson

          Just Sarge.

          Also, my brain keeps replaying: “Arr! I be speakin’ in a Southern accent! Arr!” from RvB now, no clue why.

        13. Orion Fury

          Gotcha, Just Sarge.

        14. Disloyal Subject

          TEST YOUR MIGHT! CHOOSE YOUR DESTINY!

        15. Screwball


          Let Mortal Kombat begin!

        16. Orion Fury

          I like them.

    2. Doctor_Who

      SUDDENLY DEATHMATCH
      She brutalized me
      SUDDENLY DEATHMATCH
      Show me I caaaaaan
      Punch, kick, bite, and scratch
      The girl that’s before me
      With sweet catfight action
      DEATHMATCHES ROCK

      1. Eyebrow

        Nobody ever
        Noticed me lurking
        Nobody ever
        Tugged on my cape
        Now I’m engaged in
        A suddenly deathmatch
        Initiative lost
        No convenient escape…

  11. Nono

    Her Sal-sense tingled.

  12. Coco Pommel

    Amazi-pwned.

  13. Just Me

    AG is getting careless. Even more so than usual.

    1. WhoWasI

      Yeah, as laser focused as she is on Sal, you’d think she would notice that hand coming her way. Too many late nights patrolling or writing fanfiction?

    2. Cerberus

      Well, yeah, she’s devolving into paranoia and displacing all her negative emotions into justifying hatred of Sal as well as justifying increasingly illegal and morally wrong behavior like stalking, seeking out people just to beat them up, and so on.

      The Amazi-girl alter is going down a bad bad road and that’s making her super super sloppy.

      1. Orion Fury

        And this might be the twist/it ain’t over yet Willis promised us back, what, a week or so ago?

    3. Bicycle Bill

      I guess we now know that A-G does not have “the mysterious power to cloud men’s minds so they cannot see her”.

      1. timemonkey

        Sal is no man.

        1. Spencer

          She is a space station.

        2. Orion Fury

          Perhaps the singularity overwhelmed it?

    4. Nono

      Who says she was there to stalk Sal there? She could have just been there to oversee the ral- yeah no.

      1. Orion Fury

        2-3 weeks ago AG? I’d say yeah then.

    5. GhostWriterL

      Sal’s what she has blamed for all her anger problems her entire life, outside of her dad. She succeeded in beating the shit out of him and temporarily placating that need to lash out (as well as having a decent enough excuse in foiling his attempts to take a hostage), but she has yet to beat the shit out of Sal and satiate her need to ‘defeat’ her arch nemesis.

      Before, it was solely because she recognized Sal as being the one who attacked Ethan and who she flipped her shit on after that gas station robbery… but she had a boyfriend at least that she could find solace and sexual release with. However, Sal’s presence and advice on their relationship soured that, and now she blames Sal for taking Danny away, of whom was arguably the only good thing in ‘Amazigirl’s life. Now she has nothing to lose, and unfortunately for her, Sal’s already warned her that she’ll have no problem putting a stop to her superhero charade if she oversteps again.

    6. Deanatay

      Careless? I suspect no copes realized she was there. Sal’s senses, OTOH, are much keener.

      1. Deanatay

        Grr, cops

  14. Mr. Random

    ⠠⠠⠕⠓ ⠠⠠⠎⠓⠊⠞⠖

  15. LimeSheep

    so did she just imply amazigirl is in love with her

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      But I don’t think Sal wants to be the rebound girl.

      1. Chief_of_Staves

        Sal is a bouncer. Be glad for this. Splatters make bigger messes. They throw harder.

      2. Reltzik

        She’s not rebounding Amazi-Girl. She’s dribbling her.

  16. Fart Captor

    This is why you’re supposed to perch on the OUTSIDE of the building!

    1. miados

      or in the rafters where people cant find you in arms reach

  17. Tacos

    Ah, well shit’s about to hit the fan ain’t it?

  18. Kernanator

    See? This is why you don’t wear capes!

    1. inqntrol

      And superheroes wonder why they lose sometimes against their villai s.

    2. Disloyal Subject

      They are awfully nice to have handy on cold nights of heroism, though.

  19. Plasma Mongoose

    Sorry Marcie but if Malaya doesn’t notice your rack, you won’t be gaining access to her crack.

    1. Orion Fury

      All that mountain climbing equipment just going to waste…

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Incompatible Orientation trope activated

        1. Orion Fury

          Comically Missing the Point trope put on standby.

      2. Nono

        Just needs some good spelunking.

        1. Orion Fury

          It’s just so peaceful and serene to do so.

    2. Cerberus

      I feel the Malaya not checking out Marcie’s boobs is throwing some support behind the ace spectrum Malaya theory… hopefully.

      1. Dave

        Malaya’s arc with Ultra Car in Shortpacked! makes that seem unlikely!

        1. Spencer

          Malaya only being able to express sexual attraction for one person under extremely specific circumstances makes it seem kinda likely, actually!

        2. Dave

          I wouldn’t say she has trouble experiencing sexual attraction! More of a problem with tolerating loser nerds.

        3. Spencer

          Except that time Malaya totally crashed and burned, and then she told Leslie she was trying out girls because she never really felt anything for guys.

          There is a huge, huge difference between her attempts with Movie Guy and Leslie, and how she wanted Ultra-Car to diddle her from across the room with a robot glove.

        4. Dave

          Malaya crashed and burned AFTER having enjoyable consensual sex with Multiplex’s Jason (unless I’m completely misreading the second strip I linked above; the first panel’s conversation would be a weird one to have before knocking boots, and if Malaya is supposed to be taking her bra off instead of putting it back on then I’m not sure why she would stop taking it off in panel two). She definitely didn’t say she never felt anything for guys, only that she’s had bad luck relationship-wise with them. And the across-the-room robot arm diddling was Malaya’s and Ultra-Car’s compromise; she was plenty interested in jumping UC’s engine before they worked out how she could have her needs met while respecting UC’s boundaries.

          Look, I want more ace characters in this strip too! There’s this unfortunate trend in fiction where asexual characters are represented almost exclusively by robots, which is not the most flattering representation one might ask for. And Carla, neato as she is, has her roots in exactly such a character! Plus nothing in Dumbing of Age has made even passing mention to her sexuality IIRC, so technically there’s no ace representation here at all yet!

          But seeing as DoA characters share their sexuality with their Walkyverse counterparts, Malaya seems like a stretch for filling that role?

        5. Cerberus

          I dunno, ace folks can have consensual sex. I do. And it tends to be a common experience among ace folks of an ilk that are searching trying to find the thing that will let them experience what everyone else is experiencing.

          Like, I totally get that this is a potential stretch and I’m fully prepared for this to go nowhere near that and in some other direction, but I’m an ace thirsty for representation and I’m definitely gonna take notice of potential signs and set up the foam fingers and confetti just in case.

        6. Dave

          Fair enough!

        7. zoelogical

          demisexual, maybe? only experience sexual attraction after romantic attraction to personality

        8. Cerberus

          That’s my guess hope as well! It really would fit all the potential evidence.

        9. Cerberus

          And there’s this comic from the other universe:
          http://www.shortpacked.com/index.php?id=1833

          Which suggests a definitely common experience among ace spectrum people of trying out things and not being quite sure why nothing is producing the effect that everyone else seems to experience.

          I dunno, I’m definitely setting up my ace-lerometer up for more readings.

        10. Disloyal Subject

          Bwahahahahaha, that second link almost makes me want to try Shortpacked again.
          I always get distracted by something shiny before I even make it to Malaya’s introduction.

        11. Cerberus

          It’s one of those strips that I feel gets better the further in you are into it. Some of the plotlines near the end were incredibly strong in ways that the early plotlines weren’t and the Malya-Ultra Car relationship in particular was really cute and heart-rending in places.

        12. Fart Captor

          I agree. Considering how much I initially loathed Malaya, I would not have thought it possible for me to end up liking her as much as I did.

      2. Plasma Mongoose

        …or as unlikely as it could be due to her being in a Willis comic, she might be *takes a deep breath* straight!

        1. Spencer

          Ugh. Why is Willis trying to be PC and forcing straight characters in his series?

        2. Cerberus

          I know, it’s really unrealistic and clearly just designed to appeal to the tumblr crowd.

        3. Spencer

          Like, come on, there’s so many in this series. Obviously Willis just wants to pander to straight readers.

          How many of them even are there, anyway? I’ve never seen them.

        4. Plasma Mongoose

          I’m not exactly a zero on the Kinsey Scale myself.

        5. Nightsbridge

          We know she isn’t straight because sexuality persists across universes and Malaya was in a relationship with ultra-car. Who was, you know, a woman.

          A robot woman, sure, but considering how that translates to ‘transgender woman’ in this universe that is a dangerous line to draw.

      3. DinaWho

        I had actually thought of the possibility of demi Malaya as well!
        (The only person we saw her show sexual attraction towards was Ultra-Car, and they had bonded even before Ultra-Car got her human chassis…)

        1. Cerberus

          So the theory I’m throwing the most weight behind is homoromantic demisexual. And the reason is the demi half because of what you said.

          Ultra Car was a person she bonded with for a long time, but when Ultra Car came into her own, she realized a) Ultra Car was a she and b) Ultra Car had a humanoid presence that raised her above just being a car in her eyes allowing any developing attraction to develop.

          And homoromantic because there’s a spark of something with Leslie but it falls apart when Malaya kisses her (and experiences no sexual attraction) as in her mind that seems to confirm she’s not gay (Malaya in that universe was not very aware of her sexuality or sexualities in general), but she does still care deeply for Leslie afterwards, defending her against her mom and Robin and calling out Robin at times for past treatment. And that would fold in to the attraction with Ultra Car because once Ultra Car told everyone that she had been a she (with a sexy chest hand) all along, all of a sudden, the possibility of romance was back on at least to Malaya’s brain.

          I dunno, it’s kind of a madcap theory, but I feel that folds in the other universe neatly.

  20. Some1

    Questing of Age

    Joyce and everyone else (besides Becky and Hank) run through the hallways. Joyce can here Becky and her father fighting Ross behind them, and forces it out of her mind.

    Sarah: You okay, Joyce?

    Joyce: Yeah.

    They finally reach a large hot room, made of stone, covered in vines, with a stone hole in the middle. Riley is tied over the hole, passed out.

    Roz: Riley!

    Roz tries to run forward but is stopped by the sudden appearance of Carol.

    Carol wags her finger

    Carol: Nuh-uh uh.

    Riley leaps back and is joined by everyone else.

    Joyce: You’re outnumbered mom.

    Carol: Am I now?

    A group of brainwashed choir singers jumps down.

    Carol: My leagues hold them until I’ve completed the sacrifice!

    The choir group attacks

    Meanwhile Becky and Hank continue to battle Ross.

    Hank: Becky I’ll take him from the front, you take him from the side!

    Becky: Got it.

    Hank runs up to Ross and throws a series of punches at him. Ross blocks the attack, but is staggered by a kick to the back.

    Ross grabs Becky, and swings her into the wall (which she smashes through)
    Becky kicks him in the head, and twists her other foot out of his grip.

    Hank punches Ross in the stomach, before roundhouse kicking him in the face.

    Hank: We need to finish this.

    Becky: I know

    Ross: Do you now understand, why you should bow?

    Becky: I have a plan, but I need him to hold still.

    Hank: I can do that.

    Becky: I can’t let you hold him!

    Hank: why not?

    Becky: You might die!

    Hank: For Joyce…

    Becky: For Joyce.

    Hank runs up and grabs Ross from behind.

    Hank: Becky, do it now!

    Becky leaps into the air.

    Becky: ULTIMATE CLOSEST NUKE!

    The area around Ross and Hank explodes sending them both flying.

    Becky: HANK!

    Becky drops down and runs to Hank.

    Hank lays on the ground, his body heavily burned.

    Becky: Are you okay!?

    Hank: Heh, that was a pretty powerful attack Becky.

    Becky: No…you can’t die.
    Hank: Your right…not until I’ve stopped Ross.

    Becky looks over to see the lava engulfing Ross, as his body floats into the volcano.

    Becky: You have.

    Hank: Good. Tell Joyce I love her.

    Becky: Tell her yourself!

    Hank: That may not be an option.

    Hank draws his final breaths as Becky sobs over his body.

    Composing herself Becky runs through the tunnels fast as possible to Joyce.

    Meeting Joyce in the middle of a fierce battle, Becky runs up to her.

    Becky: JOYCE!

    Joyce: BECKY You made it! Wait…I heard my dad arrive…where is he?

    Becky: Joyce…Hank is dead.

    Joyce: No…NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!

    Carol: Oh…Joyce, save that for when the sacrifice is complete!

    With that Carol drops Riley into the pit.

    1. Cerberus

      Holy shit, it’s gone all Silent Hill.

      1. Disloyal Subject

        Well maybe now I’ll have to read-
        NOPE
        NOPENOPENOPE

    2. SgtWadeyWilson

      Gah! I hate that you did that… but I love the story! I am trapped, doomed to read as you kill whoever you like, so long as you write it well!

      Good work.

    3. chalmskin

      Usually fan fiction takes great care to keep character personalities clear. This kind of just uses DOA names on interchangeable people?

      1. Some1

        Aw…

        But kinda admittedly

  21. Cephalo the Pod

    Alright, never mind, I like this scene now.

  22. Chief_of_Staves

    Sal just flipped out at AG! Maybe that reaction was over the top, but at least AG just backed down. I guess Sal made a larger impact than she realized.

    In turn, the past is preserved, trapped in Amber.

  23. Plasma Mongoose

    NO GLOVE, NO LOVE!

    1. Brotato

      Ha

  24. Cheshrin

    OH SHIT SON

  25. Orion Fury

    *Preaches about not wanting to see someone get hurt

    *Slams someone down to the ground

    Yes, I get there are differences here.

    1. Clif

      Name three.

      1. Disloyal Subject

        1) Sal cares about Marcie.
        2) Emotional pain ≠ physical injury.
        3) At this point, Sal has more than enough cause to worry about AG doing something stupid like attack her, which gets a lot harder when slammed to the ground by the cape.
        I wouldn’t be surprised if Sal eventually pulls the “I hurt them for their own good. If I hadn’t put them in the hospital they’d have destroyed themselves,” card.
        …okay, I would actually be a little surprised, but only because I don’t see that situation being resolved with less drama than character death, which is banned for a reason. But to tell the truth I’m not sure how Amazi-girl’s story is getting resolved without similar drama anyway.

        1. Nightsbridge

          Holy shit, I get that Sal has anger issues, but she’s not enough of an edgelord to attack somebody ‘for their own good.’

          That’s Amber/amazi-girl.

        2. Orion Fury

          Sal seems, to me at least, almost be playing the role of ‘bad girl’ at times, because it was forced on her. She seems to be the one who follows escalation, and not creates it. (Think Power Rangers, and why they don’t call for Zords when battling mooks)

  26. chris73

    Hmm conflicted here, Sal needs to be learn that shes a kid and not all the knowing font of knowledge and wisdom she think she is but Amazi-Girl also needs to sort her shit out

  27. Jess

    Okay, hands up: who saw that one coming?

    1. Reltzik

      I knew Sal was going to have to throw-down with Amazi-Girl eventually. I just didn’t know that would actually involve throwing down.

    2. Cerberus

      I feel this was inevitable when Amazi-girl started stalking Sal, but I wasn’t expecting this to kick off this quickly and I was expecting her to talk her way around Ethan before trying to kick off a confrontation against Sal.

      1. Disloyal Subject

        To be fair, she’s not trying to kick off a confrontation yet.
        I don’t think getting caught was part of her plan.

  28. Peny

    NO CAPES

    -Edna Mode

    1. John

      Worse than people parroting that: People not even being the first to parrot it.

      1. timemonkey

        It must be said until the capes die.

      2. SgtWadeyWilson

        To be fair, the character repeated it like a parrot in the movie.

        “Rrawrk! Polly wanna cracker! Rrawrk! Pieces of eight! Rrawrk! A tenner! Rrawrk! No Capes! Rrawrk! @!#$&€%!”
        -The Ideal Parrot

        1. timemonkey

          Only because Bob was arguing with her about it.

        2. SgtWadeyWilson

          I still wish the best lines from that movie were quoted more often…

        3. Disloyal Subject

          “I like movies; I’ll buy the popcorn,”?

        4. SgtWadeyWilson

          “That was totally wicked!!”
          “Behold the Underminer! I am always beneath you, but nothing is beneath me!”
          “Oh, ho ho! You sly dog! You got me monologuing!”
          “No matter how many times you save the world, it always manages to get back in jeopardy again. Sometimes I just want it to stay saved! You know, for a little bit? I feel like the maid; I just cleaned up this mess! Can we keep it clean for… for ten minutes!”
          Plus a few from Jack Jack Attack.

        5. Disloyal Subject

          Almost went with the Underminer, but I was megalomania’d out for the day. And Violet is adorable.

  29. Suzzzz

    wither worst possible or best possible way to greet amazi-girl: *WHAM*

    1. Orion Fury

      How about *BAM*?

      1. JessWitt

        No thanks, Ma’am.

        1. Orion Fury

          Wow, that took over three hours.

  30. Briny

    Oh, man.

    This is gonna involve the sort of security an incumbent politician can bring to bear, isnt it.

    1. WhoWasI

      Good point. Why haven’t we seen the men in suits with sunglasses and earphones before this? Or are all they about to rush out of the restroom behind Marcie?

      1. Andy

        Robin is a congresscritter. The men in suits are generally reserved for the President, VP, and other high muckety-mucks,unless there’s a specific threat to a person. Governors usually get bodyguards through the state police body of their state.

        1. WhoWasI

          You’re thinking of the real Secret Service. Many lower officials make their personal security dress and act like Secret Service right down to the black SUVs. It’s a “Look at me I’m important” thing. (Kind of pathetic actually.)

  31. JessWitt

    Daisy’s going to be thrilled, being in the same room as AG.

    1. Cerberus

      But equally disappointed by the lack of boob window.

      1. Orion Fury

        What percentage of the reader base do you think will be as well? I’d like to say 0, but we are on the internet.

        1. Disloyal Subject

          There’s bound to be a few, but form follows function, and for vigilantes without super toughness or tepmperature proofing…

      2. John

        She just needs to direct her attention towards Leslie.

        (Seriously, all you people who didn’t vote for Leslie in the poll need to take another look at that top.)

        1. Orion Fury

          Well what if we voted before we saw her in that top?

          Eh, I think I’d of gone the same route.

        2. SgtWadeyWilson

          Malaya, Carla and Billie would still get my votes, even if I hadn’t voted pre-Leslie’s current top.

        3. JessWitt

          I know right? I voted for Leslie and she’s so low in the polls.

        4. Disloyal Subject

          Sierra needs more love.

      3. miados

        i never understood the appeal of a boob window. i always thought a tummy window on lady heros would be cuter.

        1. Disloyal Subject

          They expose cleavage. People like milkbags.

          Tummies are nice too, though, and I’ve seen some rather nice costumes with a tummy window. It’s even more mechanically pointless, but there’s something very alluring about just a window of abs instead of a fully bared midriff.

      4. Reltzik

        I think she’d be more disappointed to find out there was a boob window that she wasn’t there to see.

    2. WhoWasI

      I said yesterday that Willis must have Daisy here for a reason. Could it be for her to report on the unmasking of Amazi-girl?!

      1. Cerberus

        Or on Amazi-girl’s new violent paranoid direction.

        Or worse, on the hot new badass in town (can you imagine anything setting Amazi-girl off more than to have a confrontation with her “arch-nemesis” and then see the papers the next morning raising questions about you and praising said “arch-nemesis” as a hero?).

        1. Spencer

          “My reputation” seems like another thing that Sal could “take” from Amber/AG.

        2. Cerberus

          Yup, “my reputation”, “my public”. Throw in someone she’s trying to save seeing her as a threat after that and you can add “my image” or “my mission” to the list. Which is giving me a lot of worry that we’ve not even begun to see Amazi-girl fall down this rabbit hole and so I’m stuck hoping the Amber alter can see the danger of this path as my other alters did for me and start to shunt her off of it.

        3. Spencer

          I think there’s a few clues we’re in for, at least, the most advancement in the Amber v Sal: Dawn of Justice plotline since its inception nearly three years ago. Willis linked to his patreon which he’s done for big dramatic reveals like Danny and Becky coming out, and by the end of this week we’re getting a Sal flashback.

          I could easily the end of this chapter being Sal realizing that Amazi-Girl is the kid who stabbed her in the hand.

        4. Disloyal Subject

          That… could get ugly.
          Marcie’s always been there (or shown up) to stop Sal before anyone got seriously messed up on-panel.
          But I don’t know if even Marcie could get through whatever rage might be connected to Sal’s constant gloves.

        5. Mara

          Oh.
          I never made the connection between Sal’s being stabbed in the hand, and her never taking off her gloves.

      2. WhoWasI

        Of course if Robin’s people hear of this altercation, it will be spun as AG was a threat to Robin. There’s nothing like an attempted attack to boost the polling numbers.

        1. Disloyal Subject

          Or she was a local hero acting to stop the threat posed by a convicted criminal. That’d probably appeal more to Robin’s voter base.

        2. WhoWasI

          So something like: “Congresswoman single-handedly captures a vigilante wanted for questioning and a convicted criminal when they attempted to disrupt her rally”. (Cue up the “We’ve got to give the police the weapons to take back our streets” speech on the teleprompter.)

  32. Solenoid

    Someone’s gonna have a bad day

    1. miados

      amazigirl?

    2. Disloyal Subject

      Huh. That smile of Dina’s does kinda remind me of Sans.

  33. AY

    Honestly? That’s the coolest thing I’ve ever seen.

    1. Disloyal Subject

      Watch more kung fu movies. Or experts doing demo-sparring. Judo in particular tends toward simple, straightforward, and highly effective throws like that, to my knowledge.
      Or just… anything from the Marvel Cinematic Universe where the Hulk gets smashy. “Puny god.” (I’m still bummed out that Agents of SHIELD changed their fight choreographer from the old one whose fights were quick, brutal, and completely believable to one who has characters just stand there midfight while their opponent winds up slow kicks.

      The realm of violence is delightfully broad and deep.

  34. Heavensrun

    Oh snap!

  35. BP

    Are we gonna confront Amazi-Girl’s unhealthy determination to either make Sal her Joker or prove that Sal was her Joker all along? Because I’d like that to happen before Amazi-Girl goes full villain herself. 🙁

    1. timemonkey

      This is when Amazi-Girl realises she was the Joker all along.

      1. SgtWadeyWilson

        And that she only chose to be Batman because she realized deep down that she can never be happy without a Batman, so she had to be come one?

  36. @zombieundergrnd

    I hope Sal gives her a good (verbal) lashing about her recklessness. And if that isn’t good enough, then maybe knocks some sense into her head. Amber has been acting like a complete idiot. Needs a good dose of reality.

    1. Spencer

      “It was stupid of ya to surf on a car to save Becky, meanwhile it was totally okay for me to leap in front of a truck while carrying Joyce because reasons.”

      For realsies though, Sal beating her up or calling her dangerous is just going to make her double down. What’s gonna change things, I think, is Amber having to see the results of her own actions towards Sal.

      I’m saying there’s gonna be a dramatic glove reveal at some point.

      1. Ryan

        “It was stupid of ya to surf on a car to save Becky, meanwhile it was totally okay for me to leap in front of a truck while carrying Joyce because reasons.”

        So much hero-worshipping going on in the comments while simultaneously crapping on someone else for doing similar things.

        At least Amber’s never held up convenience stores or taking a kid hostage and held a knife to their throat. You know, like some other people.

        1. Disloyal Subject

          Well, given that Sal was a kid too at the time, taking an adult hostage would have been tricky even if there were one handy.

        2. Spencer

          No, all Amber did was stab Sal in the hand in a blind rage.

          Both of them were children when it happened and they both deserve to move past it. Sal’s doing a solid job at it, and Amber is tearing herself to pieces trying to make up for it.

        3. Mav

          Same. They were both children, and Sal actually served her time for it – what were they gonna do, throw a thirteen year old kid in prison for ten years? Amber deserves to move past it as well, but she’s doing a terrible job at it because she’s still actively doing vigilante things (which is illegal), picking fights with people she has personal beef with, and now she’s stalking Sal. All these things she thinks she has to do in order to move past it, which is false- “getting back at Sal” is not magically gonna erase her own childhood and resolve her feelings about Blaine, which is the REAL root of her issues.

          Shes got her own shit to deal with, but what people are saying is she’s not entirely a victim anymore. What she does affects people – regardless of her past or her intentions.

        4. hof1991

          Many states automatically move juveniles to adult court for violent crimes. A court has to rule that they belong in juvie instead of the reverse. This is a recent trend and Indiana may not have started that at the time.

          A pair of 12 year olds in Wisconsin are facing adult court (and long sentences) for the Slenderman assault. The court denied them a move to juvie, even though 12 year olds are seriously not accountable for their actions like adults. No judge wants to look soft on crime. Or like a decent caring human, since that would end their career.

          There are cases where they wait to bring the charges and the resulting court appearance so the kid looks older. Hold them in custody for six-twelve months so they look less innocent.

          Yes, the US justice system sucks.

        5. Gamaran Sepudomyn

          Every time I hear things about the way anything involving an official US system works, it seriously makes me wonder how the sales of pitchforks and torches haven’t risen dramatically.

        6. Spencer

          I maintain that the person most harmed by Amber’s actions is Amber herself, but agreed.

          We’re reaching the breaking point, I think. We can’t go back to “Amazi-Girl beats up ne’rdowells” because we got a sequence wherein both the person she punched and the person she helped were both freaked the fuck out by her, she’s pushed Danny away, and I think we’re at the point where Amber’s so desperate to have her final climactic showdown to the death that whenever Amazi-Girl is off the leash that stalking Sal waiting for her to commit some dastardly act is all she wants to do.

          I’m also pretty confident that Amber never really gets to hurt Sal because then that means she definitely has to go to jail, but then I said the same thing about her beating the randoms she used to punch with no consequence.

          I am hoping that, at the least, this chapter ends with Sal realizing that she and Amber have history. It’s not gonna be the End of Amazi-Girl but I think we’re finally making progress.

        7. Ryan

          After Sal held a knife to the throat and threatened death to the only friend she’d probably had at that point.

          What I’m saying is eff Sal and her holier than thou bullshit.

        8. Spencer

          Sal fucked up big time. I know. I’m not trying to excuse her actions as “she was a kid” since when I was 13 I had the basic morality necessary to not threaten to murder people with knives, or even try to excuse her at all.

          The fact is that Sal committed a crime, was punished for it to the extent that the law asked of her, and that’s all we can ask.

        9. Mav

          Exactly. It’s not hypocritical for a former smoker to tell you, “don’t smoke”. Theyre saying it because they’ve lived it and don’t want you to go down the same road, not because they’re trying to be righteous about it. Amber/AG seems bent on hitting bottom on her own, despite what Sal told her before.

          Sal’s not being self righteous, she’s saying “hey, don’t do these things because you’ll freaking get arrested. I know, because I’ve been arrested for violence before.”

  37. Raibean

    Well that was certainly a nonsequiter!!!

  38. Cerberus

    Comic Reactions:

    SO MANY REACTIONS!

    Okay, let’s start at the beginning.

    Panel 1: This is actually some decent advice. Mooning around someone in the hopes that they send secret signals that they are into you is a terrible strategy to getting a date, though I do know why she’s doing that and why she’s hesitant to just come right out and ask given how hostile some people are about admitted same-gender attraction.

    And it’s not gonna feel good for Marcie to just be pining, trying to read every shift as a secret sign and hoping to sidle up enough for Malaya to clue her in and break the ice.

    Again, like yesterday, it’s blunt, but empathetic and coming from a real good place.

    Panel 2: Oof, Marcie’s face. It’s clear those are questions that are not new to her, things she’s thought about. Things she’s really not wanted to think about. Things she doesn’t want to hear, but… also sees the wisdom of.

    She’s been waiting for a sign, but in reality, she’s been pulling a Becky and more hoping for a sign and has been finding nothing there. Doesn’t mean that there’s really nothing, but she’s gonna have to use the limited sign language she’s taught Malaya to ask her and see if there’s a possibility and if not, if she’s willing to still be friends.

    Or otherwise just enjoy the friendship without stressing over signs all the time.

    Panel 3 Reaction 1: … Sal? I feel you are casting aspersions on your much vaunted straightness here. I dunno, I don’t think most 100% Kinsey 0 straight folks stare at their friend’s tits and consider them a singularity that draws all eyes.

    I’m starting to doubt your “ah ain’t doing that” from earlier.

    Also, 🙁 for Marcie’s face there. It’s so clear she knows that Malaya has not been checking her out in the same way she’s been checking out Malaya and that’s been clear in their panels together. Malaya enjoys the company, but very clearly seems oblivious to Marcie’s intentions or attraction and does not seem particularly thirsty. Which brings up…

    1. Orion Fury

      What? What does it bring up? The suspense!

    2. Fart Captor

      I dunno, I can appreciate that Chris Hemsworth is a pretty, pretty man, but I don’t actually want to bone him. Or smooch him, even. I just totally get how that would be appealing to other people.

      Does that still count as above 0 on the Kinsey scale?

      1. Mav

        True – I have friends that I know are attractive, but it doesn’t mean I’m attracted *to* them.

      2. Cerberus

        Well, yeah, but I doubt you’d describe Chris Hemsworth’s abs as a singularity from which no light can escape or a shining beacon of hope that brings water to these thirsty lands.

        You’d just say, he’s a very pretty man, nice abs.

        1. Fart Captor

          I think that may be a reference to the scale of Marcie’s baps, not their majesty alone.

          Though I might say things like “I’d probably let him do sex to me if he really wanted.” I wouldn’t get anything out of it, but maybe some of that pretty would rub off on me.

          But then, I’m completely comfortable with my sexual orientation, and enjoy over-the-top statements that completely go against people’s expectations. That’s probably not what Sal’s doing

        2. Greenygal

          Yeah, but there’s a difference between just generally describing someone and trying to make the point to them that they’re so hot that their crush-object would be staring if they were at all interested. It’s a little over-dramatic, sure, but given the specific circumstances of this conversation, I don’t find Sal’s wording particularly suggestive, especially if she’s trying to soften her unwelcome argument with a compliment. It would be different if Sal had a pattern of these sorts of remarks, the way Joyce does, but as far as I can recall she doesn’t.

      3. Disloyal Subject

        Stupid sexy Thor.

    3. Mav

      True on the advice. I’ve been in the position where instead of asking me out (I wasn’t attracted to them) the person decided being my friend was better. The only problem with that is, certain people who can’t outright get over the feelings or compartmentalize them begin to resent the object of their affection (why can’t you pick me?? Oh right – I literally said I just wanted to be friends). There ended up being a lot of resentment on that person’s part, them being a jerk for most of the friendship, and then resentment on mine, eventually.

      Obviously Marcie isn’t being a jerk about it, but it helps neither Malaya nor herself to stew in the feelings and never talk about them. Additionally, they are your personal feelings, the person you like may not even be aware of how you’re feeling, so it’s up to you to bring it up, not the other way around.

      It’s totally possible Sal isn’t 100% straight. We’ve seen her hook up with Jason, but it doesn’t mean she is only into men (unless it’s Word of Willis, then I stand corrected.) I don’t think people compliment each other on how beautiful and wonderful they are enough.

      Poor Marcie though. It’s painful, especially if rejection is one of your worst fears. She should definitely work through the feelings, but one way to think about it is you’ll meet probably more than a hundred people in your lifetime. One or several of them could be the person you want to be with/date/marry/etc.

      1. Cerberus

        Yup, that’s the badlands of that “friendzone” thinking. Thinking that all your hope for a potential future means you are entitled to them reciprocating your feelings and feeling like it is their fault that you feel like crap secretly pining for them.

    4. Butterscotch

      So is there a “bechdel test” style thing where a woman can compliment another woman’s body without the rest of the world suggesting they want to bang.

  39. Bea

    ……okay so I actually called Amazi-Girl showing up and was searching for her in the last couple strips…

  40. No Name

    So that’s what she was looking at!

  41. Mav

    Yeowch! Back problems for a really, really long time. I’m disappointed that Sal felt the need to become physical with AG – though she has every right to feel threatened by her. I know it’s meant for comic relief, but it reminds me of this one judge Judy episode where a teenage boy felt it was appropriate to throw a girl he was harassing (as in, lifted her up bridal style and threw her down) onto the floor. She broke a lot of things, went to the hospital, had to wear a brace and everything. What’s strange is that he clearly never thought about what would happen next, just thought he was being clever by “saving face”.

    Also:
    Has AG just been stalking Sal this whole time? What was she doing or planning to do up there? Was she just there to protect the rally? If so, why was she hovering right above Sal’s head?

    I wonder what will happen next. Maybe they’ll duke it out, maybe Sal will unmask her while she’s disoriented, maybe Sal will realize that while AG is often an aggressor, she’s also very sick and needs help.

    1. Her.

      sal doesnt believe in therapy and is against it though

      1. Spencer

        This is a very stupid thought process and Sal should knock herself out of it.

        1. MatthewTheLucky

          Sal isn’t exactly known for having a mature, well-rounded personality.

        2. Cerberus

          Indeed. Though it’s an easy one to fall into I think for folks with mental health stuff or just dealing with a lot of crap.

          Unfortunately for a lot of the country, therapy equals crazy and crazy equals either damaged or dangerous. And I’ve heard a lot of people, especially of the older generations that have acted like the act of getting therapy is a sign of weakness and failure and injury. One of the things my dad threw at me was the fact that my mom had been trying out therapy, which he interpreted as my fault for “driving her” to that end.

          For Sal, that came with the added hitch of it being forced upon her as partial punishment for her actions. So she’s only gotten to see it as a weapon against her to “fix” her rather than as a genuinely healing process that allows her to talk through her insecurities (i.e. some of what she already does with Marcie, but with a professional so it’s not all on Marcie).

        3. Mav

          I’m sorry you went through that. What a terrible thing to say about someone.

          Yep. Therapy is still very stigmatized – people think you are “crazy”, you might think lowly of yourself. And the beginnings of the mental health system were nowhere near as safe for the patient as they are now- a lot of people were shocked, kept in close quarters, etc. Just 30-40 years ago, the asylum could be one of the worst places you could be. But not necessarily true now.

          And definitely, if you want a kid to love to read, don’t punish them with it. You want a kid to learn to exercise/eat healthy – it should never only be done as a punishment for being overweight. And so on. Even if it a good thing, when it’s shoved down your throat by people who already treat you like crap, that good thing will seem like the worst thing in the world.

          Or worse yet, you associate doing that thing with failure:
          “So and so’s right, I am crazy/fat/lazy/whatever, since I’m doing this thing”. So you resist it, because it stopped being about healing or bettering yourself and started being about satisfying the negative self talk in your head.

        4. Cerberus

          I agree with all of that.

        5. Skater Girl (@syleegrrl)

          For a long time I was really hostile toward therapy and therapists, too, for similar reasons as Sal. I was forced into therapy as a kid and none of my therapists were at all useful. In hindsight that was largely due to me being resistant and uncooperative, but part of it was also that I hadn’t found the right one. You really have to find a therapist that you connect with and that can be really hard. Sal’s opinion on the process is perfectly understandable given her experience. And without the right therapist for you, she’s not entirely wrong.

        6. Fart Captor

          I have a feeling Sal’s had some very shitty therapists paid for by her parents to “fix” her, who concentrated on the issues her parents complained of, and not what was actually wrong.

        7. Cerberus

          Oh my Bob, this is one of my biggest pet peeves at work. So, we’ve got a lot of kids with mental health stuff, but all the intake forms are based on what the parents think is their biggest issues so they are almost always nearly 100% useless. This is because they are all based on the ignorant parent conjectures of what’s going on with their kid rather than what becomes painfully obvious after a ten minute conversation with the kid.

          And that’s at least slightly better than the ones that ask us to straight up ignore what is actually going on with the kid because the parents are in denial about it.

          *Teacher pout*

        8. Mav

          It makes me so sad that a lot of parents simply don’t pay as much attention as they should. Just take what your kid says for face value, y’know? Learn to see things from other people’s perspectives rather than through your own. Also, you don’t have to know everything, parents. Getting help for something outside your power does not automatically make you a huge failure.

        9. Spencer

          Yeah, no doubt about. I’m not sure how open Sal was during therapy, “my parents neglected me” seems like it’d be really easy for a therapist to draw out, but I’ve pretty much only ever had positive experiences with counseling and therapy so I may be undermining thing.

        10. Cerberus

          Me as well, but I remember being a scared teenager convinced that therapy meant being locked up forever in a “madhouse” because I read One Flew Over the Cuckoo’s Nest one too many times. So I can understand the fear.

        11. Skater Girl (@syleegrrl)

          Considering I actually was institutionalized a couple times as a kid, I think my fear of therapy at the time was perfectly valid. Especially given the traumatic things that happened to me while there.

        12. Cerberus

          Sorry. Definitely did not intend to insinuate that my unfounded fears were a universal experience.

        13. ischemgeek

          @Spencer: Depends on the situation.

          If Sal has been gaslighted enough, it’s entirely possible she still doesn’t really believe that how she was treated amounted to neglect. EVERYONE in her family, including her brother, have spent most of her life telling her that she deserves to get second-fiddle treatment, that it’s a logical consequence of “insert excuse here” (I am abso-fucking-lutely certain they had an excuse for it before she started robbing convenience stores – she’s so disruptive, she runs wild, whatever).

          She probably had herself convinced that there wasn’t anything wrong with how they treated her – and given that North American society generally doesn’t see all that much wrong with parents playing favorites if there’s a “good enough” excuse, even if she had been able to bring it up, the therapist might’ve continued the gaslighting (I know more than a few people who’ve had that experience…).

        14. Spencer

          I disagree with this interpretation. Sal knows that she’s been wronged by her parents, and that their treatment of her is unfair.

          It’s ultimately what motivated her to rob those convenience stores. She was so desperate for their attention she did something stupid and violent so they’d be forced to look at her.

        15. ischemgeek

          … Personal story time:

          Growing up, I knew for damn sure my folks favored one of my siblings over me. I knew that it was unfair, and I felt wronged.

          On the other hand, I also felt that their treatment of me was my fault. Because I wasn’t girly enough, I was too quiet, too weird, too masculine, too interested in being muscular, not interested enough in pink and dresses and being small and delicate and feminine.

          It is possible for an abused kid to know that they’re being treated poorly and to have anger over how they’re treated and to know how their parents treat them is wrong, and to be convinced it’s their fault at the same time. That’s what I’m getting at with Sal – get told you deserve your shit sandwich by enough people often enough for long enough, eventually you’ll start to worry maybe they’re right and you’d better just get used to the shit sandwich because it’s all you’ll ever get in life… even as you know for damn sure that a shit sandwich is disgusting and horrible and wrong to force on someone.

        16. Spencer

          I’m aware of the tendency for abuse victims to eventually rationalize what they’re going through, I know because I did that for most of my adolescence, but I don’t think that’s what Sal is doing.

          Sal knows that she’s been wronged and is also desperate for their approval. I guess it’s also possible Sal carries shame over the fact that she’s committed crimes, but whenever she talks about her past it’s always about how it’s negatively impacted her.

        17. ischemgeek

          She’s that way now, as an adult, after having years away from the situation in boarding school to gain perspective. So am I, after having years away from the situation living out of home as an adult…

          My thought isn’t over whether now-Sal is in that boat (I think she’s done a lot of healing in the years she’s been away and I don’t really think it’s a question of whether or not she realizes how screwed up the way they treat her is in her heart), it’s whether early-teens-Sal-in-therapy-because-she-robbed-convenience-stores was in it. I wouldn’t be surprised if she was back then – and if time and distance has given her the perspective necessary to recognize that line of thinking as the toxic BS it is.

        18. thejeff

          ischemgeek: It would be interesting if Sal learned from and benefited from that therapy, even if she despised it and thought it useless at the time. Even if it wasn’t directly helpful and she still doesn’t realize that she’s been using it.

        19. Reltzik

          I tend not to make eye contact because looking at faces and especially moving lips distracts me from what people are saying. I get sensory overload (bright lights in particular) and thus tend to keep my lights off and my shades drawn. I get cranky when forced into common areas with bright lights, lots of distracting noises, and people who want to talk about banal stuff like unsolicited supports about what the weather was yesterdaywhen I’m trying to focus on my own train of thoughts.

          My mom has diagnosed me as autistic and depressed. There have been repeated nags and reminders to this effect over the past several years. I have asked twice to see her credentials as a psychologist, and she’s firmly asserted she doesn’t need them.

          …. I think next time this happens I’m going to diagnose her with Dunning-Kruger Syndrome.

          In the meantime, grr.

        20. chalmskin

          Heh. She fits the profile, all right.

        21. Disloyal Subject

          I applaud you; go for it.

          Of course, while applauding I’m also mentally listing things that’ve been broken over my head for similar sass…

        22. zoelogical

          i think part of it is that Sal experienced therapy as a kid. US therapy for kids, everything gets vetted through the parents. kids have no control and no choice. anything they say can get reported back to the parents.

          so that can genuinely be a truly shitty experience.

        23. SgtWadeyWilson

          Plus, if they work for or are getting paid by a school, the grades often come before mental and emotional health.

      2. Disloyal Subject

        Are you sure about that?
        Sal doesn’t trust professional therapists, but I think I recall that she recommended that Joyce talk to someone. Just because there’s not a professional therapist involved doesn’t mean it isn’t therapy.
        Of course, given that Marcie’s pretty much her only friend, dumping all that crap on one person seems pretty shitty too. Sal played Apples to Apples in boarding school, so she likely had friends there; if Marcie being her only friend is a more recent development, that might explain Marcie’s growing(?) exasperation at Sal’s constant presence.

    2. Spencer

      It is ultimately meant to be *somewhat* comedic, since Amazi-Girl is a bit of a fantastical character. That and you’re right that this point Sal’s pretty justified in getting physical. Amazi-Girl’s being a creepass.

      And, yeah, chances are that Amazi-Girl’s been stalking Sal since shifting alters earlier this morning. I’m guessing she was hoping Sal would indulge in her Obvious Criminal Instincts and she could swoop in and save the day.

      1. Mav

        Being stalked must be so terrifying. Like, seeing that person there at the shop, in the dorm, on the street, and realizing they’ve been following you.

        AG’s plan was definitely terrible in that it’s not well thought out. It’s the same plan she usually uses unless she’s called by someone, but still.

        1. Cerberus

          It’s genuinely not fun. And for Sal, knowing how “white crime-fighter” stalking black person tends to go… oof.

        2. zoelogical

          yeah, better to call her out in a place with a bunch of people and right next to the security hired for the event

        3. Spencer

          Yeah, you can dress this up in silly costumes and revenge character narratives, but at the end of the day we’re reading about a white woman stalking a black woman in the hopes that she can get into a fight.

          I don’t think Amber’s ever going to be the villain some folks here interpret her as, but, well, that ain’t a good look for her.

        4. zoelogical

          yuuuuuuuup.

          she’s getting into some bad, boundary-crossing territory.

          i mean we don’t know that she’s here for Sal, but it’s hard to say what else she could be here for. it’s a good assumption.

        5. zoelogical

          i mean idk implication is that marcie is not the only one following people like a puppy, lovesick or not

          ….i guess i’m still waiting for confirmation but it doesn’t look good

    3. Disloyal Subject

      Doesn’t really seem comedic to me.
      I mean, I laughed anyway, but that’s more because I’m an asshole who giggles at the suffering and messy death of fictional characters, not because I thought it was a joke.

      1. Spencer

        It’s comedic in the same way Ruth’s violent abuse of Billie was kinda funny, because Billie suffers physical pain and then bounces back no worse for wear, or how Mike is a raging asshole but because he’s detached from any grounded reality so he’s allowed to be sorta funny instead of a cringing edgelord.

        Amazi-Girl is an 18-year old girl who can surf on cars if the story calls for it and alternatively get taken down with a knee to the gut. Characters are molded for the story sometimes.

      2. DSL

        It’s “comedic” in that it makes use of the tools of comedy — namely, a sudden and incongruous shift in point of view to get to a turning point, in this case a shift in story instead of a punchline — to make a point. Doesn’t have to be “funny.”

  42. Synnerman

    Oh god, this is like the end of an Ambush Bug comic.

    “Next issue! Enter Amazi-Girl

    WHEN TITANS CLASH!”

    1. Rich

      I don’t know, there’s a distinct lack of Darkseid asking if they’d like fries with their meal.

  43. WhoWasI

    Something’s odd. For AG’s cape to hang down that low from the stairway, she’d almost have to be upside down on her back. (Taking an Amazi-nap?) Or hanging like a bat. (To hear more about Marcie’s rack?)

    1. Orion Fury

      Well the wall does look flat (so it’s not there that she could of sat).

      I did that wrong, didn’t I?

    2. Disloyal Subject

      Ever played Assassin’s Creed? Picture the ‘holding onto a ledge’ squat. Now project a cape down from it and place it on the walltops (or whatever the hell those are) visible in panel 6.
      Seriously though… this ranks pretty high on AG’s Bad Decisions list. Yellow and blue do not make for good camouflage, but it is distressingly easy to get so comfortable in an outfit that you forget it’s not very stealthy.

  44. Cerberus

    Panel 3 Reaction 2: Ace Spectrum Malaya Theory Time. I know, I’m a sucker for a good ace spectrum hint, but much like with Dina I feel like there might be something here. I mean, no glancing around, no thirst… It doesn’t necessarily say ace, but there’s genuine questions about how Malaya’s “robo-sexuality” in the other universe translates to this world.

    Is she functionally ace but with a random fetish that is unlikely to come into play in the comic? Is she demi and her connection with Ultra Car in the other universe a sign of the time they spent together triggering something. And what of Malaya’s initial crush on Leslie in that universe. Maybe she’s homoromantic but not actually homosexual, and so was feeling romantic attraction, but only rarely experiences sexual attraction and then only after a long connection.

    Whatever the case, I’m excited by Marcie’s misery because this means Marcie might end up bringing this up (or maybe Sal at Marcie’s request) and so we might get to see Malaya really grapple with the question of her sexuality on panel in a satisfying way. Which might mean more ace spectrum screen-time!

    Hey, I’ll get my representation hype where I can.

    Panel 4: I really like Sal in this panel. Yes, it’s stuff Marcie doesn’t really want to hear, but she does such a good job of couching her statements and using tact. She notes that she might be biased owing to her dislike of Malaya and acknowledges and recognizes it. She pulls up short on her own statement and focuses on the main point she’s trying to make rather than getting sucked into a rabbit hole of bongoing about Malaya.

    And she brings up the problem which is mooning after someone who may or may not be into you, but you’re too scared to ask feels like shit. Because you’re constantly second-guessing yourself and every interaction, getting wrapped up in potential futures and simultaneously experiencing all the pain of rejection while making it harder for the person you are interested in to give you a clear yes or no.

    It feels safer, but it is a nasty trap and it makes one feel like absolute garbage when the person doesn’t pick up on the “secret signals”. I’ve made that mistake in my youth and I’ve seen many friends make that mistake, so Sal is right to try and steer Marcie off it before she gets into “friendzone” style thinking.

    Panel 5-6: Well… fuck. I knew Amazi-girl had been stalking Sal wherever she went. I knew Sal is way too aware of her surroundings for that to fly for long, especially with Amazi-girl getting increasingly erratic in following her paranoid delusions about all Sal “stole” from her.

    But I definitely wasn’t expecting the showdown to occur here and now in front of everyone.

    And I’m genuinely scared for both of them. Amazi-girl, because a public meltdown in front of the head editor of the newspaper is the last thing she needs for her image on campus. And it means the aftermath of her paranoia is likely to be way more far-reaching and way more potentially damaging.

    I’ve had a “golden” alter go rotten, because I ignored the red flags and the real negative aspects of that particular personality and I nearly paid a really big price for it. But luckily that all occurred in private. Friends saw some of the aftermath, mostly in the form of some of my self-injury scars, but I could readjust without having some big permanent record of just how bad I got.

    Amazi-girl is not going to have that luxury.

    And Sal is equally in danger. Yes, she’s being stalked. No, that isn’t right. Yes, she has every right to confront her stalker and demand she knock it off, defending herself as necessary…

    But she’s black. And Amazi-girl is white. And she’s in the middle of a conservative rally for a “family values” candidate confronting her paranoid white stalker stuck in a fictional reality and filled with bizarre justifications for seeing her as a wrongdoer and I’m so genuinely scared for her. The Trayvon Martin parallels alone would be enough to have me worried that she’s gonna at least catch a taser or two or at least be threatened by Marcie’s fellow officers, but that extra mix of the venue and my own experiences knowing the type of people that became private security personnel and… yeah…

    I’m very scared for Sal’s safety right now and Amazi-girl going in bad places just adds a whole ‘nother dimension of badness this could go for her.

    1. Orion Fury

      Whole lotta ‘Oh, shit’ to go around here.

    2. Reltzik

      I was just thinking, how many ‘good men with guns’ are in this crowd? Indiana does not require an additional license for concealed carry beyond the one required to carry a handgun at all.

      While IU forbids firearms on campus with the exception of law enforcement and the very rare research purpose, I wouldn’t put it past the current rally’s attendees to fail to universally adhere to campus rules.

      1. Cerberus

        Oh that’s a genuinely scary thought.

      2. Disloyal Subject

        Yeah, when one gets used to having a weapon on their person it’s all too easy to forget it’s there, or just choose to hold onto it “just in case” or “because it makes me feel safer, and it’s not like I’ll need it or anyone will check.”
        I learned my lesson after losing my favorite hairbrush. (It was also a knife.) I assume a lot of people don’t.

        1. Reltzik

          On the bright side, maybe Willis found a way to introduce Guns after all!

        2. Deanatay

          “I shouldn’t bring a gun onto campus. On the other hand, it’s a political rally – there may be terrorists posing as protesters. I’ll bring two.”

        3. Orion Fury

          And what happened just a week or so ago?

          “Someone tried to shoot up the Campus. Better bring three guns to stop someone else from doing so.”

      3. Butterscotch

        If they’re a good guy with a gun they won’t draw on two women fighting in the first place. Read how CCW laws and responsibilities actually work sometime.

        1. Fart Captor

          How people should act and how they do act are often not the same thing.

          Even assuming that a was good person with a gun, that doesn’t guarantee that person won’t panic or make a mistake. Or, you know, scare the hell out of people by drawing a gun in a crowd of people before security even has a chance to respond, starting a mass panic and confusing the situation for people who actually need to know who the threat is.

          Especially considering that neither of these two is armed, and only a week ago there was an incident where a crazy asshole pulled a gun on his own daughter, some random person in the crowd pulling a gun out is far more likely to make the situation much worse.

          I can definitely imagine situations where a citizen with a gun could have helped a situation, but I worry that there’s a lot of jackasses out there who would be far too eager to jump at the chance to be a Big Damn Hero, and get people hurt.

        2. Reltzik

          The first night in my current apartment, I walked half a block to the gas station convenience store to get a snack.

          (I had the excuse of having just moved in and not having done shopping yet. I… don’t have that excuse any more.)

          I was next in line to pay, and the guy in front of me walked up to the counter, hand in his jacket pocket. He pointed something in his pocket at the clerk and said, “this is a stickup”.

          Everyone froze. If I had a gun on me and a big-damn-heroes mentality, that would have been the time I would have acted on it.

          After about five seconds the clerk just laughed, and said “Bob, you’re so full of bullshit.” (I don’t remember his actual name, so Bob it is.) Bob laughed back, the two fist-bumped, Bob paid for his stuff, and left.

        3. thejeff

          No, no, no. You don’t understand. These things are defined retroactively.

          If they’re a “good guy with a gun” they won’t draw on two women fighting, so you know if they draw on two women fighting they’re not a good guy with a gun. Cause “good guys with guns” don’t screw up like that.

          It’s much like you can tell that the guy who shot someone in the next apartment while cleaning his gun wasn’t a responsible gun owner, but you have to assume they are responsible until they have that kind of gun fail incident.

        4. David M Willis

          Maybe you should read Reltzik’s sarcastic quotes sometime!

          Because I’m not sure any “good man with a gun” ever unironically calls themselves such.

        5. Reltzik

          Like I said, Indiana doesn’t have an additional CCW license beyond the handgun license in the first place.

          As far as I can tell from the internet, there’s no test or required class for that license either, at least not in Indiana. Mostly just a background check and making sure you don’t have certain types of crime on record. Indiana’s a shall-issue state, meaning there’s no discretion on the part of the local issuing office (often local police or county sheriff).

          You say I should read how CCW laws and responsibilities work. Could you link me to the relevant ones? I can’t seem to find them.

        6. Butterscotch

          “If you point a gun at someone you could be charged with this Class D felony punishable by 6 months to 3 years in prison.”
          http://www.myindianadefenselawyer.com/criminal-charges/weapons-offense/
          Even if a person is open carrying, they can’t just point their weapon at someone unless they have specific reason to (99% of the time this is fearing for your life) and you have to prove that in court afterwards. Even if they never fire.

        7. Reltzik

          Eeeyup, not surprising. But that isn’t relevant to what I was asking. My principle question is, what training, testing, certification, or anything at all like that is in place to ensure that people allowed to carry concealed handguns in Indiana actually KNOW this?

          And yes, like DW pointed out, I put “good man with a gun” in quotes earlier. I’m not asserting that such men (or women) with guns are actually good, I’m suggesting that they might identify themselves in that class of people who are prepared to use their guns to stop a crime in progress (which is how the phrase has been used popularly of late — “the only thing that will stop a bad man with a gun is a good man with a gun”).

        8. Butterscotch

          Knowing the law and where it is ok/not ok to carry is part of being a responsible carrier. Those are your good people. Because its 2016 and a lot of women carry guns. I don’t see why you need to assume only men carry.
          The ‘crimes in progress’ that people usually make that claim to are, not surprisingly, ones where criminals use guns against helpless people. This is, again, not such a situation.

    3. Nightsbridge

      Ace with an accompanying sex drive, maybe?

      1. Cerberus

        Certainly possible as is ace but has sex for their own reasons. There’s a lot of variation in the ace spectrum.

  45. Tomas

    Sal should not be asking AG relationship advice.

    1. Idontcarenomore

      She isn’t.
      She’s giving her advice, or at least stating her opinion to Marcy.
      They are best friends, so they do do this sort of thing to each other.

      1. Disloyal Subject

        Last panel. Dialogue bubble.

        1. Deanatay

          I think the question was largely ironic, and quite rhetorical.

          As long as we’re being pedantic.

        2. DSL

          I read Tomas’s comment as a joke.

        3. DSL

          I mean, maybe it isn’t. Maybe there are people who seek relationship advice from people they’ve just violently yanked to the ground from a height. Does that work?

        4. Disloyal Subject

          It clearly is, but I didn’t feel like tracking down a “joke over head” image to correct dontcarenomore.

  46. Sporky

    Well that took a sudden turn.

  47. Historyman68

    GloveCon MidWest 2016!

    Featured Guests: Mickey Mouse! Johnny Cochran! Danny Glover! Dexter Morgan! Those Kittens Who Lost Their Mittens!

    And Musical Performances by: Julian Casablancas! Michael Jackson! And G.Love and the Special Sauce!

    1. Orion Fury

      Brought to you by Simplicity and Trojan.

  48. Prinnyramza

    Unfortunately Sal is immune to stealth. Amazigirl should’ve tried range or exploiting her fear.

  49. Idontcarenomore

    Here come the tazers.

  50. Robert

    Damn, Sal’s got skills…

  51. Bagge

    THIS IS NOT GOOD!!!!!

    …So, how is that security gig working out, for you, Marcie?

    1. WhoWasI

      Just another boring day for IU security. Gunman on campus, attempted suicides, costumed vigilante beating up bad guys, all in a days work. Wait, this is the first time someone from IU security has actually been there for something. Marcie should get a promotion.

      1. Disloyal Subject

        Does Marcie work for IU security, or is she with a private firm that’s working this event?
        I’m inclined to guess the latter; I’d expect it to have come up by now otherwise.

  52. ZerglingOne

    I hope this leads to a confrontation. Not the hitting kind (aside from the judo cape throw) but more a “What the hell do ya have against me?!” type of confrontation.

    1. Disloyal Subject

      I think that’s pretty inevitable.
      Hitting is still at least 80% likely, depending on the content of the conversation, how willing the two are to listen, and how long it takes others to intervene.

  53. Undrave

    “Huh. Didn’t see THAT coming.”

  54. SmallTortilla

    I honestly thought we were going to have Billie try and steal alcohol from the mall, this is much better

    1. Disloyal Subject

      She still has her fake ID and parental dosh. Why would she steal?

      1. smalltortilla

        True

  55. newllend(henryvolt)

    Oh the Super Heroes cape, pretty much a huge weakness if you’re not careful, kind of like son Goku’s tail.

  56. smalltortilla

    This is going to be interesting

  57. Derek

    Personally I think Sal will be fine vis-a-vis the security team because Marcie is there to have her back. I think it’s Amber/Amazi-girl who will catch the most shit tonight

  58. Russ

    WHAT A FUCKING FOOL

  59. Arianod

    Well, someone’s definitely gonna have to get her back checked at the doctor after this.

    1. Foxhack

      I doubt it, AG has some good padding inside her suit.

  60. Mr. Random

    http://www.dumbingofage.com/2016/comic/book-6/04-it-all-returns/cadet/
    So was she just hanging out on the stairs?

  61. Will

    I really want to see Sal beat the utter crap of AG, mostly because we haven’t gotten to see Sal beat the utter crap out of anyone.

    Also because I never had any sympathy for AG. Pity, maybe, but as I said a while ago, someone needs to beat some sense into her.

    1. Rikunda

      It was fine at the start. She was doing good community work. Now she is on an obsession with Sal. Her personality is split… She refuses to listen to those that love her or seek help. Sal might be the only one able to break through to her. Sal isn’t the same as she was back then.

      1. Bicycle Bill

        To be honest, though, Sal was the person who held up the convenience store and grabbed Ethan to use as a hostage while 13-year-old (or thereabouts) Amber was helpless to do anything about it.  And then her asshole father, Blaine, used that as a club to batter and belittle her for the next five years of her life.  It may be a manifestation of PTSD or it may be something else, but I can easily see how this may be the trigger for some of Amber’s behavior as well as her fixation on Sal and can give her a partial pass for it.

    2. Disloyal Subject

      I agree utterly with the first paragraph.
      Aside from WOO, CARNAGE!, it would be interesting to see how Danny and Dorothy take it. Hell, Walky too; he might not take kindly to his ‘psycho sis’ hamburgering his cookie buddy that’s important to his girlfriend.

    3. Nightsbridge

      I highly doubt this is a problem best solved by a beating.

      1. Commodore Jeep-Eep

        Not least because it’s a fight that might go either way, considering AG is a real bantam Elemental.

    4. Fart Captor

      I don’t even think Sal wants to see things go down that way. The last time the two of them met, Sal seemed pretty sympathetic towards AG, in spite of the fact that she’d attacked her, unprovoked, the previous time they’d met.

      I’m sure they’ll end up fighting, I’d much rather see Sal try to talk her down. Being forced to see Sal as a person would be really painful for her, because then a lot of her actions (specially those against Sal) stop being righteous vengeance serving the greater good, and start being hateful, abusive acts of violence, serving only her own petty need for revenge against someone who already served their time.

      That may actually be more painful to her than Sal simply beating her up, but I think it might be the only way to put Amazi-Girl in her place so that Amber can actually start healing, and dealing with her anger in a more healthy manner.

    5. trlkly

      So you want the mentally ill woman to be beat up. You’ve never had any sympathy for her. And you’ve somehow divorced pity and sympathy, which turns pity into condescension.

      Why, Willis, do you not delete the comments that are bigoted towards the mentally ill? If they said this about Becky or Carla, you’d get rid of it. But we mentally ill people have to read people who would want to hurt us.

  62. EvolutionistX

    You know, I bet the Secret Service does not take kindly to costumed vigilantes trying to sneak pat the security guards at political rallies.

    1. David M Willis

      I’m pretty sure Congressional candidates, even incumbents, are not within the jurisdiction of the Secret Service. Like, you have to be a President, Vice President, or visiting equivalent from another nation.

      1. Andy

        Or someone further up the presidential order of succession, like the Speaker of the House. But no, a first-term back-bencher wouldn’t rate Treasury protection.

  63. Kaffeeteria

    So maybe they can FINALLY sort this out. Go Sal!

  64. Sabrina Pandora

    I wanna grow up to be Sal.

    1. Will

      Are you bad enough to be Sal though?

      1. Disloyal Subject

        I guess we’ll find out in the event that anyone tries to kidnap Dorothy.

        1. David M Willis

          ffffffffffft

  65. philip p petrunak

    God. It’s a shame she gave up her life of crime and went to college. Sal would be an amazing super villain. Would have given batman a run for his money.

    1. George Wiman

      Who knows what lies ahead in the Willis multiverse? A college-educated Sal supervillain?

      1. philip p petrunak

        We already know what lies ahead of the Willisverse. Pain.

        Pain and suffering and feels and lesbians.

  66. DepecheBag

    It seems rather ironic given their history, Sal and Ambers history, that Sal is actually probably the person best equipped to help Amber deal with her issues and the whole “Amazi-Girl” coping thing she has got going on.

    You know, ironic because of how Sal influenced Amber and all to create it and her mere presence keeps triggering it.

    Seems like Sal has put a lot of effort and work into moving past who she was at that time, while Amber is stuck there.

    1. Disloyal Subject

      Their arc is wrapped around a core of tasty, tasty irony, yes.
      Like salty caramel… the unintentional connotations of which are actually pretty funny under the circumstances, given that I was thinking about Ben & Jerry’s cored ice cream from the moment I typed ‘core.’

      1. Untes

        Thanks. Now I want Ice Cream. 🙁

    2. Spencer

      At the end of the day Sal’s really just a trigger. Amber’s problems were seeded long before her encounter with Sal. If 13-year old Danny and Dorothy were there then Dorothy would not have stabbed Sal and then spent her freshman year stalking the campus in search of ne’erdowells.

      By the same token, it’s also true that if Sal hadn’t robbed that convenient store on that day, at that specific hour, and then chosen to take Ethan hostage, who knows how Amber’s problems would have manifested.
      Shortpacked!Amber never really displayed this level of violent ideation, but she never had undeniable proof that horrible acts of violence were something she was capable of doing.

      But DoA takes place in a universe where therapy is punishable by death, so it’s probably gonna fall to Sal to start helping Amber, and I believe that the both of them are empathetic enough that once the dust is cleared, for Sal to recognize why Amber is who she is and for Amber to recognize that she violently scarred Sal, that they can move towards some kind of positive outcome.

      This makes sense to me, especially, because Amber is basically IW!Sal with a side order of Anti-Joyce.

      1. thejeff

        Well, DoA takes place in a world where at least one character’s had bad experiences with (likely court ordered or parent imposed) therapy, where another’s abusive parent sent her to martial arts instead of therapy, where the subculture other characters come from likely thinks therapy (at least any real, useful therapy) is from the devil. A world where 18 to 20 year old kids with issues don’t immediately choose the most effective ways to deal with them.

        In other words, a world very much like our own.

        1. Deanatay

          Don’t forget the ones who sent their kid to Catholic school, instead of therapy.

      2. Mara

        Therapy was recommended for 13-year-old Amber, but her father forbid it.

  67. Charles Phipps

    It’s a good thing Sal is at a Robin rally than a Small Hands rally or a black woman assaulting a white one might result in a shooting.

  68. Untes

    Sal’s got a solid point, don’t be the awkward person hanging out with someone because you want to bang them but they just want friendship. It’s creepy. As someone who has been on both the receiving and giving end, it’s bad times.

    1. Spencer

      It’s more that Marcie doesn’t know if Malaya is interested, that and this strip convinces me even more that Sal is angling for them not to work out.

      Marcie ain’t toting a fedora.

  69. Richard

    Aaaaand the beginning of the end begins.

    1. Spencer

      I wish that I could turn back time, because now the guilt is all mine…

  70. Sam

    *Amazigirl uses stealth*

    *it fails spectacularly*

  71. Deanatay

    Uh-oh, Sal’s bothering to pronounce her name correctly. Does that mean she’s taking Amazi-Girl seriously, now?

  72. Mewtata

    Okay one thing confuses me here. Sal and Marcie are facing away from each other while Sal is talking. Is Marcie deaf, or only mute? Cause even if she lip-reads, that configuration makes no sense for either of them.

  73. Just Me

    In terms of style, Amazi-Girl is DC Comics; Sal and Walky are Marvel Comics; Joyce, Dorothy and many others are Archie Comics/Dark Horse; Dina is IDW

  74. Teddae

    aww man, i wanted to make the no capes reference but lots of people already beat me to it

  75. Michael Steamweed

    And 170 references about “No capes!” ensue. 😀

  76. Kater

    Sure, this looks impressive but Sal ripped down several innocuous curtains before she found the real amazi girl.

    1. David M Willis

      ha ha ha ha ha

  77. Regalli

    Yeaaaah, this is about to go very bad very fast.

    Oh dear, third act.

    Oh dear, Sal. Oh dear, Amazi-Girl. Oh dear oh dear oh DEAR, everyone.

  78. Tenchan

    Cue the intro!!!

  79. Taigan

    Sal? Didn’t you have some very good advice about NOT ESCALATING situations? What happened to that?

    1. Fart Captor

      This may actually be a better move than letting the situation play out on its own. Amazi-Girl probably would have waited until Sal was alone, and most likely would have attacked her again.

      This way, AG is out in the open, and Sal has Marcie and a bunch of onlookers who will hopefully side with her (or at least Marcie, since she’s got a uniform) if AG gets violent.

      Simply calling her out instead of violently yanking her from her perch would have been better, and less likely to lead to a fight, but I imagine it was really satisfying

      1. thejeff

        I would actually have liked to see the reaction shot to Sal just saying “Oh. Hi, Amazi-Girl.”

        Cool as Sal played it though, there may have been some panic in there if she suddenly noticed Amazi-Girl looming over her. Adrenaline and fight or flight reflexes (which we know are firmly pegged at “Fight” for Sal.)

  80. Commodore Jeep-Eep

    Oh dear; this might end up on the evening news.

  81. Lan

    Why is Amazi-Girl even there? This doesn’t seem like the kinda thing that needs a vigilante.

    1. Commodore Jeep-Eep

      She’s a stalker long overdue for forcible institutionalization for a spectacular case of DID as well as likely an alphabet of other trauma related syndromes.

  82. y3k

    This is some Bane level shit right here.

  83. jmcallaway

    Edna had the right of it Amazing Girl…
    “NO CAPES!”

  84. Victor Riley

    Amazi-Girl is becoming that which she swore to fight… a villain. Stalking Sal, maybe getting ready to jump her? What the hell, Amber?

    1. Spencer

      What’s likely is that Amazi-Girl’s been following Sal all day since Amber shifted alters earlier.

      She wants Sal to do something evil so she can swoop in and justifiably defeat her in honorable combat, but Sal keeps mucking that up by not being the cartoon supervillain Amber needs her to be.

  85. Sageress

    hasn’t she been hanging with malaya for like a week

  86. trlkly

    I take it that Sal has no interest in convincing Amazi-Girl that she’s no supervillain?

    Because that was a response straight out of a comic book.

  87. Keulan

    Sal has gotten ridiculously good at owning Amazi-Girl. If she wanted to, I bet Sal could be a badass supervillain.

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