117

Hallmates
Posted on February 5, 2020 by David M Willis

117 thoughts on “Hallmates”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    PANTS ARE FOR THE WEAK

    and for the strong

    and for everybody

    pants cover legs

    1. LeslieBean4shizzle

      No, I say!
      Down with pants! Vile leg prisons!
      ….
      But yeah, in all seriousness, I kinda hate wearing pants.

      1. LeslieBean4shizzle

        … as in I prefer how dresses and skirts feel. Pants always feel too restrictive and uncomfortable – and overly warm – to me.
        Crap. Should have explained that in the first place.

        1. Keulen

          I wish it was socially acceptable for men to wear skirts.

        2. tyersome

          Try it! I think you will find afterwards that it hasn’t kilt you …

        3. clif

          Mike was kilt. See how it all connects?

        4. tyersome

          I’m sure Mike will be addressed eventually.

        5. clif

          But can you be sure that Ruth will be uh-dressed eventually?

        6. Justin P Yates

          As a dude, I love my kilt!

        7. He Who Abides

          @LeslieBean4shizzle – my fiancee has that same approach to fashion choices. Though she has several pairs of overalls for when she wants pockets, so I think it’s *just* pants that bother here.

        8. LeslieBean4shizzle

          **nods**
          One of the many reasons I dislike Winter here in Ohio is that dresses/skirts basically become nonviable, and I am forced into pants.

        9. TheCerpent

          I understand it might still be overly warm and grrarghlegprisons, but when I still lived in an area where winter actually happened with frozen water and stuff, I had a pair of fleece-lined jeans that were basically my favorite thing ever.

        10. He Who Abides

          Are tights or leggings able to help with the cold, or no?

          Also, found a typo in my other post. “Her”, not “here”, you big dummy.

      2. Booyahman

        “Ah, thank God, I don’t need pants now.”

        -WoWCrendor

    2. Tan

      So it’s all finally out in the open.

      Ana’s been taking the top spot this whole time only to sell out to Big Pants.

      Have you no shame?

      1. Ana Chronistic

        I was inclined to sell out to Big Pantsu but Billie’s outburst contradicts that

    3. foamy

      Pants are an *illusion*.

      (and so is death)

      1. Roborat

        Eat Arby’s

    4. Mr. Anderson

      “Silly Billy, pants are for Femurs.”

    5. BrokenEye, the True False Prophet

      Pants!
      Sing the praises of pants!
      Nothing better shows my taste
      Than what I wear below my waist!
      Pants!
      Sing the praises of pants!
      They help me suck in my gut
      They always cover up my butt!
      Huh, Pants!
      Pants!
      Sing the praises of pants!
      Wear them and you’re a cool guy
      As long as you zip up your fly!
      Zip! Pants!
      Pants!
      Sing the praises of pants!

      That’s right ladies and gentlemen! Consider the PANT! You know, the Pants Association urges you to wear your pants at least three times a day!

      The great men of our time have all worn pants! Roosevelt! Churchill! DeGualle! Ghandi—Well, almost all of them!

      Dolphins! One of the smartest mammals on earth. Do they wear pants? NO! But they wish they did! That’s how smart they are!

      What keeps our legs all warm and hot?
      Pants!
      What prevents a buffalo shot?
      Pants!
      What do they got that I ain’t got?
      Pants!

      1. Ana Chronistic

        Pants!
        Sing the praises of pants!
        …
        Shit.
        Shit! Shit shit shit…

  2. Doctor_Who

    Billie just needs to walk out there without pants and within ten seconds Pantsless will be in at Forest Quad.

    1. DailyBrad

      I mean, it isn’t outside the realm of possibilities, Billie did unclog the trash chute once in tanktop and underwear, Billie’s not very shy.

  3. shadowcell

    Dumbing of Age Book 10: You Still Don’t Have PANTS!

  4. deathjavu

    “Last night, you said no pants, and now you’re saying pants! Make up your mind!”

    1. AGV

      Those mixed messages

  5. CMasta

    I can’t cheer any of this. The relationship still feels toxic to me.

    1. clif

      How long have you been reading Willis comics?

  6. Suet

    Once again, like Billie horfing, Ruth forgot the situation.

    Did Billie get to smother in Ruth’s nethers, tho?

  7. Slartibeast Button, BIA

    Largo would approve.

  8. Stephen Bierce

    *plays a jingle for designer jeans from circa 1980 on the hacked Muzak*

  9. AntJ

    Wow, they’ve come a long way in the past year. Here’s the strip from a year ago today: https://www.dumbingofage.com/2019/comic/book-9-comic/02-but-the-sun-still-shines/bones/

    1. mrnoidea

      Feels like yesterweek.

    2. Meagan

      Holy crap! I am in shock that this happened a year ago. It feels like it just happened. I mean it did in comic time but still – a year!

      1. BarerMender

        The older you get the shorter the years.

        1. Geneseepaws

          Requests Bierce play “The Circle Game,” on his hacked Muzak.

  10. Architex

    “Honey, where are my paaaaaaants?”

    1. Bicycle Bill

      I thought the line was, “Where’s my super-suit?”

      1. King Daniel

        One’s from The Lego Movie, the other’s from The Incredibles.

        1. Bicycle Bill

          Well, there you go then.  One was a good movie, and the other was an advertisement for a line of toys.

        2. Sunny

          Oh! I get it! It’s funny because you can interpret that as either movie being good, and the other being an advertisement for a line of toys.

        3. Deanatay

          Disney DID make Incredibles action figures…

          And games.
          And clothing.
          And just about everything you can slap an ‘I’ on.

  11. DailyBrad

    Ah, that’d do it. Underpants.

  12. Reltzik

    I mean…. you’re not WRONG, Ruth…

  13. LeslieBean4shizzle

    **beams**
    Beautiful Billie moment is Beautiful.
    Hm
    If I wasn’t so tired/busy, I’d consider turning that smiling Billie into my new Gravatrar.

  14. Cattleprod

    Bed sheet toga?

    (Huh, my name and email weren’t already filled in, they were over on Joyce & Walky)

    1. vlademir1

      I’ve noticed that happen from time to time. I’m pretty sure it’s typically related to a cookie expiring as such things oft are online, though server reboots and other such things can also cause them depending on the back end software involved.

  15. BBCC

    Ah, yes, the one sure fire way to get Billie to do something – spite.

    And Ruth maybe catching on. Oh well, at least she’ll finally have to show her floor mates Ruth’s not just a conquest.

    1. Kyrik Michalowski

      It is for the best, trying to pretend she is something she isn’t can’t last forever. And hopefully along with finally detoxing and giving up booze for good, she’ll feel better after she does.

    2. thejeff

      Yeah, this is good. Not hiding Ruth from her new floor is a really good step.

      Though the whole rest of the floor is still looming outside the door waiting aren’t they?

  16. Tacos

    Nah just go out their without pants. That’ll intimidate them. Assert your dominance.

    1. Keulen

      Yes, this. And if they ask Ruth why she’s not wearing pants, she can just asking them why they are wearing pants.

    2. Roborat

      Then pee on them.

  17. Kravis

    Ah, yes.

    My favorite flavor of Ruth.
    The pantless kind.

  18. Bagge

    NO SHAME, NO FUCKS TO GIVE, NO PANTS!

    1. Kyrik Michalowski

      When I worked at Jimmy Johns we had a shirt that said, “No shoes, no shirt, no pants, no problem, we deliver.” I like to take that attitude when it comes to pants.

    2. King Daniel

      Act with integrity, no repants!

      1. Delicious Taffy

        I can’t pick a single repants joke, so here’s all of ’em.

        Kingdom Hearts III: RePants
        Repants my post if you agree
        Reduce, repants, recycle
        Don’t Fear the Repants
        Repants McEntire
        “Repants!” “That’s one vote for each of us.”
        My Little Pony: Repants is Magic
        Quinton Repants

        1. Dana

          Star Trek II: The Repants of Kahn

      2. Deanatay

        Repant! Repant your sins before the end times! Repant!

  19. Kyrik Michalowski

    Admit it Billie, you don’t want her to put on pants any more than she does.

    To be fair, who likes wearing pants?

    1. Agemegos

      My pants have my pockets in them.

    2. Reltzik

      My pants keep me warm during near-freezing winter conditions.

      1. Roborat

        Pants are just someplace to attach the pockets.

    3. He Who Abides

      I’m a guy. My options are limited.

    4. Vangeln

      My pants keep my legs free from mosquitoes.

  20. Regalli

    Pants are a useful thing for first impressions.

    Also while yeah, Ruth can leave Forest Quad a smoldering crater, it would be nice if anyone in it could learn a boundary or two. Cheerleaders aren’t that fascinating. Stop being creepily obsessed. (One year I shared a bathroom with a girl who taught sailing at a country club so WASPy the Kennedys had membership. I was boggled, but SHE did not inspire the vaguely stalky wonder Forest Quad has for Billie.)

  21. Opus the Poet

    Pants are overrated. Long skirts for men! Seriously skirts or kilts are much more practical especially if you have impaired mobility

    1. BBCC

      Not if you live in Canada during winter they aren’t!

  22. Catman

    Those thighs are the thighs of someone who hasn’t lost their femurs

    1. Needfuldoer

      How does one steal their own femurs?

      1. Tacos

        With determination and patience.

        1. clif

          And pain.

        2. Catman

          Paintience

  23. brionl

    “You have a large collection of femurs, and no pants!”

  24. Wizard

    After reading the alt text, I can only assume that the femurs Ruth takes somehow enhance her own.

    1. Dana

      Knockin’ me out with those Canadian thighs.

  25. Lingo

    I will consent to slacks, but not to jeans!

    1. Lingo

      Whoops, try again…

  26. Chris Phoenix

    I was re-reading some of yesterday’s comment thread, where people were discussing whether Dina was ace. Some people took her wearing a shirt with ace-flag colors as evidence for her identifying as ace, or being ace (a message from Willis).

    And then I remembered her wearing an Anderson University shirt, and saying it was a funny joke because Anderson U thought people like her shouldn’t exist. That makes it very likely that the ace-colored shirt is a message from either Dina or WIllis: “I have full sexual feelings thank-you-very-much! (And also full sexual agency!)”

    And let’s remember that in other universes she dated Walky and pursued (and slept with) Mike.

    I ask again, is there ANY evidence that Dina is ace? …Other than some people in the comment thread assuming and/or wishing and/or taking offense that she might be? Where did the idea even originate? Why is it getting so much press time?

    1. Sam

      Being asexual and dating/sleeping with people are not mutually exclusive. I don’t think Dina is ace because of the way that she reacted to Becky dressed in a dinosaur outfit which did imply she found it sexually attractive but people like to theorise and debate about this type of thing when the sexuality isn’t concretely specified. Like, this isn’t uncommon, people have theorised the same thing for Mike because his sexuality is also unspecified/unclear and he is 100% the type of person who would have sex with people he isn’t attracted to remotely just to mess with other people.

    2. StClair

      Fandom (any fandom, in my experience) is full of marginalized people desperately seeking representation, to the point that they’re perfectly capable of seeing it in inkblots. At least here, we often have access to Word of Author to confirm one way or another (or that they’re leaving it deliberately unclear, so people can believe whatever they want to).

      1. Jay

        This comment just reminded me of the recent RWBY fandom debacle with Clover.

    3. Ivy

      Listen…as an ace person, putting a shirt that is very clearly the ace flag on a character just to give people false hopes (ace characters are VERY rare and every one I find is like a diamond), would be very very shitty and I don’t want to think that Willis would make that kind of misstep. Leaving the kind of ace open for interpretation is one thing, deliberately trolling people longing for good rep is another.

      1. Sam

        A good point. Dina could still be grey-ace easily regardless.

      2. BBCC

        Since you’re looking for ace characters, Carla is also ace!

        1. Ivy

          Yep and I was super happy about that!!!

        2. BBCC

          Okay, wasn’t sure if you knew that or not.

      3. Regalli

        Also, he posted a picture of the shirt he based the character model off of on Twitter around that time, and its stripe colors were NOT purple, black, and white, meaning that was a deliberate choice.

        Personally, I’m an autistic ace gay. (Hell, I’m an aro-ace gay. Want a relationship someday, aesthetically attracted to women, don’t really get either crushes or pants feelings for people.) Dina reads VERY familiar to me, including her irritation at not being seen as someone who can have sexual and romantic feelings for others. That doesn’t mean she experiences sexual attraction all that often or outside certain circumstances (Say, her cute girlfriend looking cute and wearing her nerdy PJs,) because I don’t either. Hell, I have a libido, I’m perfectly willing to have sex someday in a relationship, I just don’t get spontaneous feelings like that for others. But I’d be pissed the hell off if someone told me I seemed ‘too young’ to date in a way that’s clearly linked to the way I know I’m different.

        (Also, about Anderson: as my ‘ace gay’ bit indicated, ace people can still consider themselves gay or bi based off their romantic attraction – a lot of us do. The other thing is that even aro-aces or heteroromantic aces don’t get off that easily from that particular strain of the religious community. Oh, premarital sex is a sin, sure, but once you ARE married you’re supposed to be happy to do your duty and make babies, so they get upset if you’re not prioritizing those things. Sex being enjoyable and also thing it takes great sacrifice and willpower to avoid BUT THEY MUST is actually part of their doctrine. If you don’t struggle with it, well, you must not have met the right person yet, or something’s wrong with you. Heteronormativity comes in many insidious forms, and all aspec folks are inherently LGBT because we’re stuck in a culture that expects us to be into this thing we by and large aren’t.)

  27. BenRG

    “Lucy! Why didn’t you tell me that Ruth hadn’t put on her pants?”

    “It didn’t seem like something that I should be the one to say. Besides, I don’t know Ruth well enough; she might always dress like that!”

  28. Miri

    Aaaw this feels like a big progress moment from Billie to me ❤️

  29. AGV

    Those thighs hide some very powerful femurs, mind you

  30. abysswatcher1993

    Those stepford smilers should fear Pantless-I mean Ruthless!

  31. FacelessDeviant

    Pants?
    Gondor has no pants.
    Gondor NEEDS no pants!

    1. BenRG

      Or why we all prefer Sean Bean as Boromir.

  32. Koms

    Femurs

  33. Kitsune

    Grundy want pants too

    1. John

      Oh lord, what does it say about me that I know EXACTLY what you are referencing?

  34. ValdVin

    Know(ing) me…knowing you…Aha!

    I can’t be the only not-young to pick up on that: Willis is a big Alan Partridge fan.

  35. Geneseepaws

    If she goes out in “chaps”, it will just fuel the rumour mill…

    1. Geneseepaws

      Ruthless could use Crisper to edit herself some jeans, no?

  36. Pylgrim

    Just let her go like that. Everybody in that building will believe that’s a power move.

  37. Zee

    My pants look good on me

    1. Zee

      Fuck. That was supposed to be a reply to @Kyrik Michalowski

  38. MutantSentry

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UpWOvK-mz7U
    Crow: Joel, I hate movies where the men wear shorter skirts than the women.

    Tom: Yeah, I can just imagine a scene from Ancient Greece: “Oh, hi, Hercules, have a seat!! Noooo!!!”

    Joel: You are so right my little itty buddies. That’s why we’ve put together a presentation. It’s a little thing we like to call: PANTS!

    Tom: (singing) Pants!

    Crow: Pants!

    Bots: Sing the praises of pants!

    Joel: Nothing better shows my taste, than what I wear below my waist!

    Tom: Say! Pants! Hoo hoo!

    Crow: Pants!

    Bots: Sing the praises of pants!

    Tom: They help me suck in my gut They always cover up my butt! Huh? Pants!

    Crow: Pants!

    All: Sing the praises of pants!

    Crow: Wear them and you’re a cool guy, as long as you zip up your fly!

    Tom: Zip! Pants!

    Crow: Pants!

    Bots: Sing the praises of pants!

    Joel: (spoken) That’s right ladies and gentlemen! Consider the PANT! You know, the Pants Association urges you to wear your pants at least three times a day!

    Crow: The great men of our time have all worn pants! Roosevelt! Churchill! DeGualle! Ghandi!–Well, almost all of them!

    Tom: Dolphins! One of the smartest mammals on earth. Do they wear pants? NO! But they wish they did! That’s how smart they are!

    Joel: What keeps our legs all warm and hot?

    All: Pants!

    Crow: What prevents a buffalo shot?

    All: Pants!

    Tom: What do they got that I ain’t got?

    All: Pants!

    Tom: Well, you can say that again Huh?

  39. Wraith_Ferron

    I’m so angry that there’s no “decent pair of pants” jokes in all the comments

  40. Rabisch

    Lucky know how brings out Billie best side. I start to like how them cohabit is slowly become more equal. And I definitely love Billie’s declaration of unconditional love for Ruth.

  41. ziggy78eog

    I am totally okay with, “no pants Ruth”.

  42. Yarrr

    Billie you should be sweet more often.

    1. Bathymetheus

      If this is representative of the new, alcohol-free Billie, that may well happen

  43. Lunarius Haberdash

    It fucking is. People who think otherwise aren’t socially acceptable, however, and should hide their heads in shame.

  44. DarkoNeko

    It’s ok, they’ll so scared they’ll look do—WAIT

  45. nightshade

    this one was funny and cute

  46. Shmidny

    I’m honestly surprised Billie didn’t tell her to shut up or call her a nerd.

  47. brian

    HEy remember when Mike was probably dead? Yea, me either.

    1. MutantSentry

      Meanwhile- down a seemingly deserted ally

      Mike: *goans*

      Mike: *drools*

      Mike: *Bleeds*

      A scrap of paper blows down the ally and sticks on his face. It is advertising a trivia night at the student union.

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