165

Origin
Posted on April 16, 2013 by David M Willis

165 thoughts on “Origin”

  1. Plasma Mongoose

    “MY PARENTS ARE NOT DEEEEEAAD!”

    1. Aizat

      MY PARENTS ARE DEAD……..TIRED!

      1. Jenny Creed

        MY PARENTS ARE DEEEEEEEAAAD!

        (See it’s funny because my parents are dead.)

        (Don’t worry, they died long ago.)

    2. Count Dracula

      “MY PARENTS ARE DEEEEEENTISTS!”

      1. Ross_Varn

        Hermione!

        waaait a second

      2. Nerdman

        And when they were younger, just bad little kids… Their mothers noticed funny things they did…

        1. BackslashEcho

          Like shooting puppies with a BB gun…
          They’d poison guppies, and when they were done…
          They’d find a pussy cat and bash in its head…

      3. Aisling

        The fact that your name is count dracula makes your comment way more funny

    3. GoldStarz

      MY PARENTS ARE DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEELIGHTFUL!

      1. Splash of Brown

        HA

    4. Wack'd

      MY PARENTS ARE DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENTONS!

      Wanna see my toad collection?

    5. Aizat

      MY PARENTS ARE DEAAAAAAAAAAAAAAFFFFFFFFFF!!!!!

      1. Notebooked

        PAAAAAAAAAAAAARDOOOOOOON?!

    6. MeHael

      Why is everyone shouting in my FAAAAAAAAAAACE!!!!!

      1. Aizat

        Well, you took some of our FEMURS and we needed that to live.

        1. david burnward

          I found this humourus

      2. Mr. Plinkett

        What’s WRONG with your FAAAAAAACE?!

      3. cdot

        my parents are deeeeeaaaaannnns at the local community college

    7. Geegles

      MY PARENTS ARE DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEESPERATELY TRYING TO PUT ME THROUGH COLLEGE WITHOUT PUTTING ME INTO DEBT AS WELL

      1. Geegles

        DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEBT

    8. Beachfox

      I JUST WISH ONE OF MY PARENTS WAS DEEEEEAAAAAAD!

      Seriously. That guy’s a jerk.

      1. james

        well in one universe.

        for all we know her mom’s the ass in this one and her father took her to Korea. Where he remarried and Amber gets along with her little brother , faz

    9. MrSmiley

      hi

      1. projectbluebird

        Some nice gravatar/comment synergy today!

    10. Usayasha

      MY PARENTS ARE DEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEECENT PEOPLE!!!!!

    11. Andiemus

      My parents are deeeeeeeeeeeeeeefintiely sick of this gag.

      1. Nerdman

        Your parents read webcomics? Awesome!

    12. Nezumi

      Not sure if you’re familiar with Amber, but yeah, her parents (or at least one of them) not being dead is kind of the problem here.

  2. nexev

    I think at this point anyone who’s parents were gunned down in a alleyh would deliberatly try to avoid being batman.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Being Batman is jolly expensive for a start.

      1. Aizat

        Yeah, training around the world and all that gadgets costs a lot.

  3. Wonder Wig

    By the way, Super Dumped is the Superman to her Batman.

    1. marr

      Super dumped sounds more like a villain than a hero, and one that needs to work on their fiber level in their diet.

      1. Lukkai

        Super Dumped could be the name of a band.

  4. Sir Robin

    I look forward to reading her “origin”, should be interesting to see what she comes up with

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      She was exposed to gamma radiation from an old 50s Kids Science Lab Kit while she was doing some work experience in the complaint department, thus giving her super=immunity to criticism.

      1. Aizat

        She witnessed her parents being criticized in a back alley after watching her favorite film. From then on, she trained her mind to resist criticism.

  5. Doctor_Who

    “The day my father Odin banished me from Asgard, I was bitten by a vampire and had radioactive waste dumped into my eyes. To make matters worse, my mutant ability to control weather activated just as I was hit by a blast of gamma radiation.”

    Bonus points if you recognize the quote.

    1. Aizat

      Deadpool from Marvel Ultimate Alliance, right?

      1. Doctor_Who

        Correct!

    2. Totz the Plaid

      I don’t remember where it’s from exactly, but I’m pretty damn sure Deadpool said it.

  6. NCP19

    Amazi-Girl: Year One (minus all the WHORES WHORES WHORES WHORES)

    1. Cholma

      Well. That’s no way to get Frank Miller to draw “Amazi-Girl Issue 1”.

      1. Ryorin

        If Frank Miller wrote it, it wouldn’t be “Amazi-Girl Issue 1.”

        It would be “Goddamn Amazi-Girl Issue 1.”

        1. Mr. Plinkett

          And Amazi-Girl would be replaced with Crazy Steve and the comic would eventually get reviewed by someone sitting on their futon while wearing a fedora.

        2. Ryorin

          I love that you made that reference.

        3. Notebooked

          Amazi-Girl: Year One.

        4. Historyman68

          All-Star Amazi-Girl and Dan, the Guy Who Is Her Boyfriend And Is Pretty Dumb But Pretty Sweet Too

    2. james

      but whores need loving too

    3. Frank Miller

      My parents are WHOOOOOOOOOOOOORES

  7. Regalli

    Well, that rules out Dina. We all know her parents were gunned down in an alleyway, so with no other relatives she was sent back in time to the Cretaceous Era and raised by dinosaurs before being sent back to combat evil. The raptors taught her how to hide behind doors.

    1. timemonkey

      We saw Dina’s parents in one of the first strips.

      1. David

        All this happened in the past few weeks. Dina’s taking it very well.

        1. Zababcd

          Now it’s canon.

        2. Tom T.

          They were gunned down by a cannon?

        3. Volkai

          And now it’s a canon cannon.

        4. Zababcd

          Oh dear. I never meant to launch the idea of a canon cannon, like a canon cannon cannon might.

        5. Zababcd

          It occurs to me that a ‘canon cannon’ cannon is very different from a canon ‘cannon cannon’. I would just like to point out that I would very much enjoy a canon ‘cannon cannon’.

        6. Jeff K!

          That would, of course, be a cannon that fires smaller cannons out of it. Bonus points if they in turn fire tiny cannonballs as well.

        7. Tylertlat

          I’m so happy I witnessed this.

    2. Plasma Mongoose

      Dina’s parents were gunned down by protesting extremist creationists while she was visiting the dinosaur exhibition, thereafter she adopted the Dino-Cap as a symbol to spread fear to all those who reject evolutionary theory.

  8. Count Dracula

    “Forsooth, my father, Amazi-Dad, is High Lord of Asgard, and I…”

    1. Zababcd

      Must put a lot of pressure on a man, being named Amazi-Dad.

      1. timemonkey

        Hopefully the pressure never got to him and he never vented it on his family.

        1. Valdrax

          Ewwwwwwww….

      2. Historyman68

        He must have an awesome mug.

      3. mancuso

        It’s still better than the moniker of his nemesis, Perverti-Uncle.

  9. Kernanator

    Maybe he should have asked if she was part alien. I mean, what are the odds of that?

    1. Yotomoe

      True but what if she IS. Are you really comfortable making out with a different species? That’s gross.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Unless they’re hot, then it’s awesome.

      2. Aizat

        Tell that to Commander Shepard.

        1. Cholma

          Human, Asari, Quarian… it’s all good. It’s the female Batarians you have to watch out for.

        2. Andiemus

          Or Captain Kirk.

    2. Wack'd

      Not as good as the odds of her being part Martian.

  10. Yotomoe

    Well the costume shop was having a sale…That’s it. That’s my origin story.

    1. Aizat

      Then the costume got hit by cosmic rays, granted powers by the Norse Gods and was bitten by a radioactive praying mantis.

      1. Ryorin

        The mantis’ parents were gunned down by criminals. Thanks for making the mantis cry, Danny.

      2. Roborat

        And she lost the manual describing how to use it.

        1. Bill M.

          She was given another manual and lost it too, however there were only two manuals because printing costs are outrageously high, and she never did think to hold the case the costume originally came in and focus on the first manual.

    2. Tom T.

      But she lost the instructions for the costume.

  11. Yotomoe

    “Well once I was dating a guy and he dumped me and I ripped his spine out and I vowed to do the same to any boy who ever dumps me ever again.

  12. Kiggy

    I love Amazi-Girl

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Did you know you had a Danny grav when you made that comment?

      1. Lukkai

        Apropos grav: Haven’t you used the current one before, Plasma? I’m pretty sure I remember this particular one.

        (And is that supposed to be Mari Makinami? Looks like her, even though the hair colour is way to light.)

        1. Plasma Mongoose

          I have used this grav a few times before, I like to recycle sometimes.

    2. Aizat

      You and me both, kid.

    3. Cholma

      I do believe that Amber/AG is my favorite character, but it’s a war between her and Sal from It’s Walky!

      1. Campor

        I can understand not being able to pick a favourite between two characters, but I’m a little confused as to why you’re calling Ultracar Amazi-Girl. It’s not like it’s a spoiler to use his real identity.

        (Also, seeing as Ultracar is in fact in a relationship with a human in Shortpacked!, this sort of comment just got a whole lot more plausible.)

        1. vsophi

          her*

        2. Lukkai

          its?

  13. someguywithakatana

    So is anyone else like… really uncomfortable with how terrible this is probably for Danny?

    1. Aizat

      Why? It’s not like there are villains that are gunning for him or anything.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Not yet… 😀

        1. timemonkey

          Not until the rise of Dr. The Great Faz!

        2. TinHeart

          This… This really needs to happen. After all, the presence of a super-hero always breeds super-villains! Specially nemeses. Amazi-Girl needs a nemesis! And what better nemesis than a secret half-sibling?

      2. someguywithakatana

        This is just my own interpretation, but one of Danny’s major flaws is that he lives in an idealized fantasy world. What with him planning on marrying Dorothy and following her around everywhere to achieve that goal. His entire plan for his future was what would for most people just be their idealized dream. This whole situation seems to me to be enabling that bad tendency.

        It just seems unhealthy to me. Dating a super-heroine is like… as close as you can possibly get to dating the idealized concept of a woman rather than the woman herself. That’s how I interpreted the decision he made when he decided to just be friends with Amber and date Amazi-girl in any case. He literally rejected the actual woman in favor of an idealized version of her. Hell, even in this comic, when she offers to tell him who she is as a person, he rejects the idea in favor of asking for more information about her superhero persona.

        I’m not saying Amber gets this and is enabling him on purpose. But this is still a bad situation for anybody (I say this being the kind of person to enter into relationships with the idealized concept of my partner and not my partner themselves) but it especially seems bad for Danny.

        Now the question is how much of this is Willis’ intended allegory, and how much is my own overanalysis?

        Plus, there is the whole thing where a superhero as a girlfriend is going to, by nature, be distant and unavailable. What with the whole fact that you have no idea who they are and probably don’t have any means of getting in contact with them.

        1. Logician

          Totally agree. But it seems to me that ALL the sexual relationships in DoA are pretty messed up.

          Walky/Dorothy is based on the idea that you can have an ongoing intimate relationship without becoming emotionally involved, which is certainly not true in my experience, direct and indirect. If they wake up and realise that hormones have made them care about each other, what are they going to do about their basic differences?

          Joyce/Ethan is an attempt to help each other with their emotional problems, but it’s clear from their conversations that they don’t understand each other at all, and certainly don’t understand what the problems they need help with actually are. Neither of them should be in a relationship at all, but they are both just distracting themselves from the things they need to deal with.

          Billie/Ruth is already abusive, and (if it gets going) is going to be an abusive relationship. Ruth may have real problems, but she takes them out by bullying vulnerable people, and sex isn’t going to stop that. I think it’s going to go bad.

          Roz uses sex for political purposes. That’s just horrible.

          Of course, bad relationships make good stories. I think DoA is the best thing Willis has ever done.

        2. timemonkey

          When did Dorothy or Walky ever state their relationship was completely free of emotional ties? They like each other, they’re exploring that, Dorothy is upfront that she plans to leave for a different school asap so they’re hoping to keep things somewhat casual. It’s possible they could stay together when she leaves, but Walky isn’t all ‘we’ll be together for the rest fo our lives as I cling to you with no other goals and maybe you might give up your goals and cling to me too!’

        3. Logician

          Dorothy has repeatedly expressed her ambition to be a serious person with adult goals. She sold all her cartoon books because they were part of the childhood she was leaving behind. But cartoons are the only thing she has in common with Walky (apart from physical attraction). I think she sees him as (caramel flavoured) candy: comforting, but something she’s moving away from.

          To Walky, on the other hand, these same cartoons are one of the most important things in his life, and her shared interest is the trigger which made him admit that he likes girls. He’s making a lot of concessions to move out of his comfort zone, and although better clothes and tidier habits seem like trivial changes they go against everything he professes to believe. I think he sees her as something unexpected and wonderful that makes big changes worthwhile.

          Of course, people change a lot at that age and they could both grow towards each other, or it could be a fun short-term relationship that ends without too much grief. The worst outcome would be that it remains fun without either of them changing much, they get married by default, and in five years time they need a divorce because they’re too different to live together. At the rate the comic’s going, we won’t ever see that!

        4. mrelegos

          Oh, so what you’re saying is that Danny is making terrible decisions and lacks persepctive or appreciation for what makes a proper relationship, rather then Amazi-Girl treating him badly.

          Oh yeah, Danny’s an idiot. Most of the cast are idiots.

        5. Tom T.

          Honestly, how many of us, particularly among this strip’s audience, would pass up a chance to date a superhero?

        6. begbert2

          Danny likes dating a superhero because it’s cool. (This may be revealing him as a comic book geek, but I think they have pills for that now so it’s fine.) He chose Amazi-Girl over Amber for one of two reasons:

          1) He didn’t recognize her, doesn’t like two-timing, and was already with Amazi-Girl and likes the bird in the hand, or:

          2) He knows they’re the same person and is playing along to the hilt.

          And he didn’t accept her offer to tell him who she was because she didn’t offer; she thought he was demanding the information. And that would be just rude. If she wants to bring him into the fold and doom him to being killed by a supervillian next issue, that’s something she can do at her own pace.

        7. Historyman68

          An idealized woman who asks him to clean gunk off a sign. This isn’t exactly glamorous. Half what they do is sit around playing Nintendo.

        8. Historyman68

          Dating a superhero means there’s a lack of pressure. She’s not always gonna be around, like he expects Dorothy to be, they don’t have to subordinate each other to the othet’s hopes or goals, since they’re a mystery. He gets to relax and be with a girl who’s driven, but in a very different way.

        9. someguywithakatana

          To qualify, I’m not saying it isn’t adorable. it’s just not gonna end well.

    2. timemonkey

      Yeah, having an ass kicking, myseterious woman who obviously likes him and saves him from being assaulted is so terrible for him.

    3. John

      … Nnnnno?

      Isn’t anyone forcing Danny to exchange doughnuts and manual labor for Amazi-Kisses. He could walk away if he wanted.

      It isn’t making me think he’s any less pathetic, but that’s Danny for you.

    4. Jason

      I guess you’re referring to the possibility that Danny may be super embarrassed and pissed if (not when) he finds out AG’s identity — which is something I worry about too. AG is really kinda playing him for a fool here.

  14. Zababcd

    Well, she freaked out when it first appeared on her computer, but it turns out it’s pretty much just a new version of the EA Download Manager.

  15. Plasma Mongoose

    Possible Origin Story for Amazi=Girl: She’s practicing for when Stan Lee relaunches the “Who Wants To Be A Superhero?” show.

    1. Aizat

      Another possible origin story: It was passed down to her for generations.

      1. Ryorin

        Amazi-Armstrong, the Uncriticizable Alchemist.

      2. Gargamel

        Amber’s Dad is basically Ra’s al Ghul
        ????
        Sal becomes Amazi-Girl.

        Hmm…. it probably relates somehow.

        1. Notebooked

          All these comments about Sal being Amazi-Girl make me think there’s gonna be some bit where Amazi-Girl fighting and distracting Sal gets her into an accident on her bike. She survives with little injuries, but her jacket gets torn and ripped. Stepping off with her helmet on, she loudly asks what’s going on. Biker helmet? Sleeveless leather jacket? Clearly, a new anti-hero’s in town!

          (I wonder how grounded Amazi-Girl is. I mean, she does seem to have a grip on reality, but she also seems to have a sort of unrealistic view on how encounters with crime go, as evidenced by the vandals.)

  16. Zababcd

    Her parents were graffitied n an alleyway.

  17. JBO

    AG in the third panel just looks super cute!

  18. ridtom

    “Someone criticized my civilian attire. Never again.”

  19. John

    Danny. Amazi-Gi- Amber clearly told you cupcakes.

  20. Ty Ty

    AG’s Face, In Stages

    Face, Stage 1: “Ughhh yesss, dis donut is soooo gud”

    Face, Stage 2: “Huh, I didn’t know this donuts had nuts in it.”

    Face, Stage 3: “I think that’s a tooth, and not mine.”

  21. Arkadi

    How does she do the blue speech ballons?

    1. Jason

      A lot of swearing.

      1. Valdrax

        *ba-dump ching!*

      2. Wack'd

        “You do have a bit of a…reputation.”

    2. linkman0596

      it’s her “dark knight” gruff voice……Batman “you are totally dumped”

      1. Arkadi

        Yeah, but how does she do it?

        1. timemonkey

          By altering the sound of her voice. The bubble is representative of that.

    3. Null Set

      In my mind, she sounds like Annie attempting to do Christian Bale’s voice. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hUyJqS1nLGs

    4. Kelly

      How does Deadpool do the little yellow boxes?

      1. Notebooked

        Oh, gross. That’s a whole other way of breaking the fourth wall.

  22. Badeyes

    hm ever since Aizat started popping up in all the threads I keep having this crazy urge to check my back…

    1. Aizat

      Yes, sleep with one eye open. I’ll be watching. HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! GOOD NIGHT EVERYBODY!

  23. bunivasal

    Actually, Danny, maybe you should find out a little bit more about the strange woman you just kissed.

  24. Anonymous

    I note that whether he is dump-worthy or not, based on what he chooses to say, is irrelevant to what happened to be or not be in her past. Either {he’s a horrible enough person for saying that to (deserve to) be dumped}, or {she would have dumped him without him deserving it}. That she hasn’t found it a horrifying enough thing to dump him for suggests the second, whcih leaves the statement only serving to paint her in a worse light (other than drawing his attention to the lack of tact in the sentence). Hm.

    1. tyren22

      Or she realizes that if that were true she’d have been hurt enough by him bringing it up in such an insensitive way that she wouldn’t be acting rationally.

      Or…. she was joking.

    2. OnnaStik

      Or, and I realize this may seem weird, relationships don’t actually follow the rules of formal logic?

  25. Yarrr

    This is still the most adorable thing since Rose/Kanaya.

    1. Josh

      You clearly haven’t seen Ultra-Car/Mayala.

      1. timemonkey

        Gasp! Is Ultra-Car cheating on Malaya?

        1. Arkadi

          Not yet. Give it two or three weeks, real time, before one of them cheats on the other.

        2. Josh

          I would be distraught! 😛

        3. begbert2

          “What do you mean, ‘cheating’? I told you I wasn’t going to be your vibrator. We’re just friends, and my sociological studies show that humanoids can have as many friends as they want. They just have to not hit them with pies.”

  26. Crumplepunch

    Until this point I honestly thought that Danny was feigning ignorance and couldn’t possibly be that stupid.

    Obviously I have given him far too much credit.

    1. CRtwenty

      It’s ok, Danny’s been disappointing people for years.

      1. Josh

        Just wait untill prom.

    2. Kernanator

      Hey, we still haven’t gotten definite proof he isn’t.

      No, I don’t think I’m near a river in Egypt. Why do you ask?

  27. averystrangeplace

    Okay, people, I’m putting five bucks on “Her origin story is going to be really, really freaking depressing”.

    1. timemonkey

      “My dad married some other woman and my boyfriend turned out to be gay, now I haunt the night.”

    2. Aizat

      “My father was a drinker and a fiend”

      1. Wack'd

        “My father…was a race car driver.”

    3. Notebooked

      “There were no awesome girl superheroes. Like, c’mon.”

    4. Nerdman

      My father… was an accountant. Now I prey the night.

  28. Sterling

    I’m putting money on her origin story being “I just wanted to show some assholes who’s boss around here.”

  29. Josh Rotella

    So, would it not have worked for her to have taken a picture of the engineer defacing public property?

  30. Paul1963

    Secondary punchline:
    AMAZI-GIRL: By the way, could you get some tea with honey in it next time? This voice is really hard on my throat after a while.

  31. Ray

    I’m guessing it’s more the “Kick-Ass” origin, “I read too many comic books and it seemed like a really fun thing to do.” Fortunately a college campus isn’t quite as dangerous as the city in Kick-Ass.

  32. begbert2

    “I was bit by a radioactive amazi. Yeah, I’m not sure what it is either, but it hella hurt.”

    1. Wack'd

      “MY HOME PLANET IS DEAD!”

  33. LS

    Her origin story is clearly “Well, I found it was more efficient to level when my characters had the rested experience point bonus…”

  34. HookedOnKomics

    I just started reading this today, and I’m terribly disappointed…

    THAT I REACHED THE CURRENT COMIC!!! There are no mores?:(
    I will have to do something silly…
    Any ideas??

  35. brionl

    I can’t believe all of you guys forgot “Trained by a secret order of immortal monks at an underground monastery in Tibet. Then left the order to track down her former best friend that went evil and killed their master.” It’s so obvious.

    1. Andiemus

      Or, “in a car accident and training in a secret monastery in the middle of nowhere where the teacher gives her life new meaning after showing her that she doesn’t need her surgical abilities to live a fulfilling life”

  36. munky

    so what’s the plot of this comic anyhow?

    1. Bill M.

      This is a “slice of life” comic. Amazi-girl exists to keep the cretinous villains from extending to the psychotic stage of super-villainy where slice of life isn’t a euphemism, but a dangerous threat.

  37. Sock

    I saw “Twighlight or Shutterfly” and immediately looked to the poll area. I am disappoint.

    Pinkie Pie and her pandemic of precious perpetual partying ftw.

  38. nothri

    I’d say this is why batman can’t keep a steady girlfriend, but actually it has more to do with them turning evil and/or dying.

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