177

What
Posted on January 6, 2012 by David M Willis

177 thoughts on “What”

  1. Tom

    Billie’s face in the last panel is weirding me out for some reason. O.o

    1. NCP19

      It reminds me of Foxtrot, specifically Jason’s face in some comics.

      1. MadarFoxfire

        It’s sorta like that circular pursed-lips expression they make when they’re pleased/anticipating but in a different style.

        1. fellixe

          She looks like Hattie from NCIS:LA

        2. GhotiHeads

          I have to disagree. She has a Fox Trot face.

          For example: http://comics.ganneff.de/2008.05.29/Foxtrot-2008.05.29.gif

        3. CWR

          Panel 5 is a total Jason Fox face.

        4. Katie

          Agreed.

  2. Uniqueantique

    Yeah agree.

  3. Caffeinated

    It’s Ultra Car dammit!

  4. Gundi

    …Yes. Sal is Amazigirl. Also Ed Wood was a great director.

    1. Aizat

      And Drake of the 99 Dragons is a good game.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        and Street Fighter: The Legend of Chun-Li has the best SFX and acting ever. 😛

        1. Aizat

          And One More Day is the best thing to happen Spider-man since the Clone Saga.:)

        2. dchorror

          At least the Clone Saga was fun to read, if a bit long winded.

        3. Joe

          And Uwe Boll’s next movie is going to be good!

        4. Aizat

          This might sound crazy to you but there is one good Uwe Boll movie.

        5. Jetstream

          In the Name of the King, right? I’ve heard that one was actually watchable. Haven’t seen it myself.

        6. Kernanator

          You’re right, that does sound crazy.

    2. DudeMyDadOwnsADealership

      And Rob Liefeld was a very professional, versatile comiker.

      Also, Dave Sim has no personal problems with women whatsoever, just like how Alan Moore is none too proud of his British roots, couldn’t be less drama prone, and doesn’t make any effort to resemble a moonsick mushroom wizard.

      1. Filthy Pazuzu

        Your first one physically hurt.

      2. Pagannerd

        I love Alan Moore like he is my messiah, and even I couldn’t stop myself from choking with laughter at that description of him.

        1. Lordphulish

          Sure, and Frank Miller thinks those occupy wall street folks are real american heroes!

  5. Wonder Wig

    Billie! Where’s my Super Suit!?
    Whaaat?
    Where – is – my – super – suit?

    1. Aizat

      I stored it away.

    2. LimeTH

      WHY do you NEEED to KNOW?

      1. Aizat

        I NEED IT.

        1. Tucker

          Nuh-uh! Don’t you think about runnin’ off and doin’ no derring-do! We’ve been plannin’ this dinner for two months!

        2. Zababcd

          The public is in danger!

        3. Aizat

          My evening is in danger!

        4. Tucker

          YOU TELL ME WHERE MY SUIT IS, WOMAN! WE ARE TALKING ABOUT THE GREATER GOOD!

        5. iSaidCandleja-

          I am the greatest good you are EVER gonna get!

        6. Plasma Mongoose

          Here is a suit with a chest-window, now that is the greater good.

        7. Tucker

          I’d say Combo-breaker, but I think the Combo came to its natural terminus.

        8. Keulan

          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=x2qRDMHbXaM

        9. nekobawt

          listening to that clip repeatedly and reciting the lines was the best part of working concessions in a movie theater when “the incredibles” came out.

          well, that and selling popcorn and milk duds to mike tyson. (true story!)

        10. Jetstream

          What the HELL is wrong with Pixar, putting out a Cars sequel before a sequel to THAT. Are they insane!?

        11. MarcinMN

          The public is in danger!

        12. K

          My dinner is in danger!

        13. fellixe

          Anger is in danger! (See, you just take the D off)

        14. OhHayMike

          Two drums and a cybal fall off a cliff…

        15. Tucker

          And nobody noticed.

  6. Aizat

    Subtle, Billie. Real subtle.

  7. carl320

    Amazi-girl uses doors… can’t be Sal.

    1. begbert2

      When have we seen Amazi-Girl passing through a door?

      1. dchorror

        Elevator door, when Billie recommended she be a cheerleader.

        1. begbert2

          Billie is the one who entered the elevator, not Amazi-Girl.

          The only reason I know that is because I remembered it as Amazi-Girl entering the elevator too, and was going to write in the exception until I went and double-checked it and found I was wrong.

        2. dchorror

          Amazi-Girl did leave the elevator, however.

    2. begbert2

      Also we just saw Sal pass through a door – so she can’t be Sal.

    3. AckAckAck(Now with sugar powered speedster!)

      No dina, you are the Amazi Girl.

      1. dchorror

        It’s getting to the point that I’d believe Everyone is Amazi Girl in Indiana.

        1. Kernanator

          Amazi Girl is Legion.

        2. Argon

          And then Amazi-Girl was a Geth.

        3. We are Joyce, and we are legion.

          Amazi-Girl, too?

  8. Loser Boi

    the face in the last panel iss awesome

  9. TSB

    Does anyone else feel like Sal and Walky should adopt Billie as a third sibling?

  10. Eolirin

    … Billie is pretty dumb, huh? She’s seen Amazi-Girl up close, and she looks nothing like Sal.

    1. dchorror

      If you were a super hero, wouldn’t you find ways to make your alter ego not look like yourself?

      1. Kalan

        Right! Like putting on glasses! One little touch and your whole look can change. Glasses, and the power of The Script, of course.

        1. dchorror

          Putting on glasses is actually a pretty effective way to be not recognized. It’s amusing the number of people who don’t recognize me because I’d forgotten my glasses in the morning.

        2. Kernanator

          I know what you mean.

      2. Jetstream

        Of course! Sal’s disguise involves being several inches shorter and at least twenty pounds heavier! It all makes sense now!

        1. Jetstream

          Oh, and mousy brown hair shorter than her natural hair!

        2. aqua

          wig and bald cap. dreadfully uncomfortable but no one could pull your hair, arguably worthwhile discomfort.

  11. KresyAntics

    Sal… respectful and asking permission to break the rules… Has she been body snatched?!?

    1. Leorale

      Yeah! she even walked through a door and everything.

    2. Plasma Mongoose

      Yes, she is a pod person.

    3. Plasma Mongoose

      @KresyAntics: No, she’s just a Rule Abiding Rebel.

      1. Khrene Cleaver

        Blast it! I just spent the last 2 and half hours on TV ropes!

      2. I don't always comment on DoA, but when I do, it's to identify with Sal

        She can adhere to her own moral code without necessarily fitting the rule-abiding rebel archetype. Keeping one’s word and not breaking agreements are pretty common pieces of moral fiber.

        1. David

          I like your username.

        2. Tucker

          My Gravatar doesn’t agree; but then, he doesn’t agree with much.

          Except your mom, for a nickel.

  12. Nexev

    Now I just cant help but imagine Sal becoming Amazi girl’s robin somehow.

    1. Leorale

      Batman ain’t no sidekick.

      Who would be Alfred?

      1. Gundi

        Duh. Dina. She’d be a perfect Alfred.

      2. fellixe

        Jason

      3. DudeMyDadOwnsADealership

        Save in past tense, since Dick Grayson did become Batman pre-New 52 reboot….

        Speaking of which, how many times did Bane break Batman’s back and how many new graveyards did the Joker fill after the last Flying Grayson filled in for the Brooding Loner?

  13. mechaqua

    Wait I am confused was the roommate agreement actually ever handed in? Because if it was the Ruth has no reasoning to bullying Billie(other then the stolen beer however Ruth has not proof of this and according to Coffin v. US presumption of innocence is assumed until proven guilty) , therefore this whole story need not have taken place. Unless Ruth is a an @$$ #013. Sal dresses in blue so she cannot and Amazi-girl dresses in blue and yellow, which Sal does not who else dresses in blue and Yellow. Therefore Amazi-girl must be Wolverine!!! or Amber ( that’s pretty far fetched).

    1. Joe H

      yes…. because Ruth seems the type to obey case-law….

    2. aqua

      Ruth is venting bottled up aggression from family problems on the first person who made herself a reasonable target. Ruth feels miserable and is making Billie her company.

    3. BrokenEye, True False Prophet

      Don’t be absurd. Amber wears glasses.

  14. Mkvenner

    Willis, please never draw billie like that again. ever.

    1. David

      She looks like that from now on.

      1. Tucker

        I’m down.

        1. Kannyn

          Taunt not the Willis.

        2. Tucker

          In this case, and this case alone, I encourage the feeding of the troll.

      2. begbert2

        I can’t wait to see what that face looks like from head-on!

        1. Mkvenner

          It probably will look a lot better.

    2. Plasma Mongoose

      That will teach you to tempt fate asking Willy things like that.

      1. DagonXIII

        Do not meddle in the affairs of David Willis, for he is subtle and quick to anger

  15. LARPeX

    SAY “WHAT” AGAIN!

    1. mechaqua

      I DARE YOU I DOUBLE DARE YOU M%&&*% $%$#3& SAY WHAT AGAIN!

      1. Aizat

        He’s black.

        1. pan_dim_onium

          I love that both this and the Incredibles reference up in the comments are Samuel L. Jackson

        2. Kernanator

          Samuel L. Jackson is the gift that keeps on giving.

        3. Kernanator

          Does he look like a bongo?

        4. Aizat

          What?

        5. Kernanator

          *BLAM* DOES HE. LOOK LIKE. A bongo?!

        6. mechaqua

          *sob* NO!! *sob*

        7. Kernanator

          Then why’d you try to fuck him like a bongo?

    2. Wix

      Dammit, you actually beat me to this one. Darn my late day alarm clock.

  16. Rognik

    It’s totally Jennifer’s fault for all the “What”s. If she didn’t mumble, we wouldn’t have this problem.

  17. Alechsa

    Meanwhile… Ruth is still alone in a hallway with Walky….

    Cut to gratuitous scene of their clothes on the floor…. next to a box of fiddy-piece nuggets.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Walky/Ruth/McNuggets = OT3

      1. AJBulldis

        I AM BOARDING THIS SHIP.

        1. Kernanator

          PREPARE TO BE BOARDED.

        2. Chocobonobo

          For a nickle.

        3. Chocobonobo

          OCD commands I correct myself. nickel*

    2. dchorror

      This comment has made my day. There is no further reason to post today.

  18. AckAckAck(Now with sugar powered speedster!)

    And then LoisLane chasing on the false lead for months.

    Lois Lane, action journalist, able to reveal big conspiracy, never realize Clark and Supes are the same person.

    *face in two palms*

    1. iSaidCandleja-

      To be fair, those glasses do cover a considerable portion of his eyes.

    2. aqua

      doesn’t she figure it out a few times, but then there’s mind erasing, and somehow she sees them both at the same place at the same time?

  19. AckAckAck(Now with sugar powered speedster!)

    No Billie, you’re wrong. Dina is the Amazi-Girl.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Wrong again, Dina is (not-so)secretly Boner Babe.

      1. Khrene Cleaver

        And her Sidekick Dorothy, the Headline!

  20. jjareds

    Fonzie?

    1. Aizat

      Eyyyyyyyyyyyyy

      1. Kernanator

        Oh wow, now I can’t unsee it.

        1. Aizat

          Unsee what? Guiltar doing the Fonz’s “Eyyyyyyyyyyyy”?

  21. Spammy McSpamster

    Hey look! It’s that recycled joke from shortpacked.

    1. Spammy McSpamster

      *cough*Robin/spidercar*cough*

    2. Phillip Wilde

      Recycled? Perhaps. Still funny? Damn skippy.

    3. Aizat

      There are things in the world that are funny even if it’s recycled, like Tom and Jerry for example.

      1. nekobawt

        ben and jerry’s ice cream, not so much.

    4. Cherry

      Pretty sure this joke is used in every piece of fiction that involves secret identities of some sort!

    5. David

      I’m pretty sure “someone has a secret identity and someone makes a perhaps erroneous guess” is a trope that eclipses Shortpacked! by a very wide margin. To say this is a “recycled joke” is to paint with a ludicrously broad strokes.

      In Shortpacked!’s case, Robin thinking Ultra Car was Amazi-Girl was a parody of that trope, because no sane person would think that a human girl is a car in disguise. In Dumbing of Age, if Billie is wrong, this would be playing the trope straight, because Sal being Amazi-Girl is not a terrible guess.

      I am amused by the idea that, in a world with a superhero with a secret identity, one is not allowed to guess wrong about their identity, because that is a “joke” that you can’t repeat. Does everyone have to get it right on the first try, or can no one guess at all?

      1. Spammy McSpamster

        Your squirming sustains me.

        1. David

          Your lack of rebuttal and admission to trolling gives me the impetus to remove you.

        2. Tucker

          Don’t feed the troll. Justification just sustains it. If trolls are ignored, they eventually starve and eat a gun. Nom.

        3. David

          I prefer to block the IP of the troll from the website.

        4. Tucker

          Eeep.

        5. Spammy McSpamster

          If I’m a troll, you’re too gosh darn sensitive.
          My so-called ‘trolling’ was just a lame joke right from day one. Way to censor the lame.

          Also, conveniently I just moved. So it’s like it wasn’t ever blocked at all. HUZZAH.

      2. Amilam

        Actually Sal as Amazi Girl is a terrible guess. Different height, weight, nationality, glasses, hair length, pop culture references, fashion style, voice, etc. It would be plausible if she had just heard second hand accounts and made the connections, but having ridden her… not so much.

        Anyways, just my 2 cents. ymmv

        1. aqua

          ridden her . . .

  22. f.p.

    Walky is Amazi-Girl. Notice how much he wishes he could wear pajamas made for girls? Cross-gender crimefighting is his only outlet. He made the Batman remark about Sal to throw Billie off his trail, knowing she’d catch on otherwise.

    1. Zababcd

      Billie is Amazi-Girl. She’s only accusing Sal so that Sal doesn’t learn the truth. Her previous encounters with Amazi-Girl are explained by time-travel.

      1. f.p.

        Are you kidding? The clues totally point to Walky. Notice the hyphen in “Amazi-Girl?” That long, stiff hyphen is a phallic symbol, indicating that Amazi-Girl has a penis (hence the amazement). Walky is also assumed to have a penis, so it’s a perfect match. Furthermore, David Willis left a clue in one of his other works. Turns out the title of one of his most epic comics is “It’s Walky!” What more proof could we need?

        1. fellixe

          Amazi-Girl is Faz with falsies and a tuck.

  23. Tenn

    PersonwhoisAmaziGirlsayWHAT.

    1. Jackson

      All the ladies in the house put your hands up!
      All the fellas in the house put your hands up!
      Now whoever is Amazi-girl put your hands up!
      Now everyone else put your hands down!

  24. Aizat

    Who does Sal think she is? Stone Cold Steve Austin?

  25. Lordphulish

    I AM AMAZIGIRLSPARTACUS!

  26. Hitoshi

    She is CLEARLY the Catwoman to Amazi-Girl’s Batman.

    1. begbert2

      So, that means we’re shipping Sal/Ultracar, right?

  27. TheBenenator

    She used to be Amazi-Girl, but then she took an arrow to the knee while eating cake.

    1. turkishproverb

      Huh

      1. TheBenenator

        I know I confuse myself sometimes, but geeze. X~P Skyrim meme + Portal meme.

    2. Khrene Cleaver

      Please, that cake is clearly a lie.

      1. Michelle J Caboose

        But it’s so delicious and moist!

  28. Kelvin

    What would happen if Billie, Sal, and Amber were all in a room together?

  29. Kelvin

    Also, am I the only one thinking Billie and Sal need to get together right about now?

    1. Zababcd

      Of course you’re not.

      1. Kelvin

        Awesome! >:D

  30. Drunken Nordmann

    Joe is Amazi-Girl. He disguises himself to Joe the sexually indecisive – with his penis, I assume.

    1. begbert2

      It bears noting that the list of people who have been saved by Amazi-Girl are 1) Joe’s friend Danny, and 2) various women.

      1. Kernanator

        That… When you put it like that, it does make a certain amount of sense. You know, aside from the breasts.

        1. AckAckAck(Now with sugar powered speedster!)

          Are you implying you want to see Joe with breasts?

        2. Kernanator

          What? No! God no! I’m just saying:
          Amazi Girl = Breasts
          Joe =/= Breasts

          This is the primary hole in the “Joe = Amazi Girl” theory, but other than that, considering what begbert said, it makes some sense.

        3. Khrene Cleaver

          You’re just wondering where Joe’s primary chest hole is!

          And By hole I mean window…

        4. Tucker

          This just makes me think of Cybersix

        5. Kernanator

          Will people please stop trying to ship me with Joe?

        6. Drunken Nordmann

          As a friend of me would say: “Nein, jetzt erst recht.”

          I’m currently looking for the correct translation.

        7. Tucker

          Awww, does Joe make you nervous?

        8. Kernanator

          Anything with a naked penis makes me nervous.

  31. begbert2

    I just noticed that Sal’s hair has one side tucked behind her ear and the other hanging free to cover the other ear – and which side is tucked back changes to face the viewer. And now I can’t unnotice it. I’m picturing it actively rearranging itself as she turns her head. Kinda freaky.

  32. Asuka L.S.

    If I weren’t so attached to my Joyce gravatar, I’d totally change it to Billie’s face in the last panel.

    1. Asuka L.S.

      Well, attached to A Joyce gravatar. I’m thinking about changing it up, but I want to stick with Joyce.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Change is good, trust me on this.

      2. Kernanator

        Please don’t change it just for the sake of changing it. Besides, I just love that deadpan Joyce.

        1. Asuka L.S.

          Very well. Deadpan Joyce shall stay. It’s a rare thing anyway, and I’d hate to leave it vacant and have someone else pick it up. It’s kind of like a signature at this point.

        2. Asuka L.S.

          Besides, this image most closely fits the theme that my screen name sets.

  33. Karadan

    I love how putting on a mask and costume stumps any and all forms of identification other than seeing the person’s face. Sal is taller than amazi-girl, has the wrong skin tone, and obviously different hair. Now, some of these could be faked to some extent, but I think Sal would have serious trouble hiding her hair under a wig to make it look like Amazi-girl. Ah, the magic of a mask and costume…

    1. hmm

      As has already been pointed out above, the hair is actually the easiest of these.
      Basically you braid it and tye it close to your head, and then pin the wig to that. It sorta works at concealing identity because everybody expects it to be impossible, but it’s really easy.
      The skin is similarly easy, make-up, but application time should be much more extensive, which may make it impractical.
      Height is the hardest one. It’s relatively simple to get height augmenting shoes of some sort, but obviously you’re assuming Sal’s height is the real height (since Walky would know otherwise). You can pretend to be smaller than you are by standing in the correct angles and abusing perspective, but it’s a constant effort and it’s very easy to slip, so I doubt it’d be worth it. It would also impair her fighting prowess a fair bit.

      1. Amilam

        Right, so considering all that plus changing her accent, manner of speech, weight, and pop culture references we can safely say it’s a bad guess. Really bad, which is fine. Plus I really don’t buy that even professional make up artists could do a plausible job bridging the gap.

      2. Karadan

        True. Total transformation time from Sal to Amazi-girl: About an hour or two 😛

  34. Sporkaganza

    What if Amazi-Girl is actually Jason?

  35. SgtNumnum

    Facepalm

  36. BrokenEye, True False Prophet

    Your secret is safe with me, Superman

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