I disagree. Smuggled cell phones into prisons is a real security problem in the US prison system and inmates need positive social interactions more than pretty much anybody (not that they are likely to get it in prison. Whose idea was it to rehabilitate criminals by taking all the people in society who hurt others so bad they needed to be separated from it and then packing them like sardines into a small windowless room together?)
PirateTawnee
The US prison system has nothing to do with rehabilitation and lots (all?) to do with legalised slavery and profit. (kinda like many other US systems, but I’m reaching now, so I’ll shut up.)
True Survivor
I always knew the St. Louis Department of Parks, Recreation, and Forestry was up to no good.
Uh, I don’t see how prisons are relevant to the point I was trying to get across? Still good points tho, what you said is still valid either way.
Like, neurodivergents can benefit from social relationships as much as neurotypicals, but being forced to do them “normally” and at “normal” frequency can make them less enjoyable or even inaccessible to us, you know?
Joy
Prison security is a bad thing?
Taffy
I think the point was more that inmates are so desperate for interaction, they’ve made phones one of the most popular things to smuggle in, which is absolutely a security issue. I’d want a phone too, if I was bunked with Stabby Carl. Security is good, obviously, but I do think we could stand to ease up on people who are most likely just down on their luck and made one wrong move too many.
Joy
Yeah :3
Inahc
iirc, US prisons have also turned visitation rights into a profit machine, charging exorbitant fees for family to call/message/visit someone who’s in prison. why profit off just the prisoners when you can profit off everyone who cares about them too? ?
Walky has already said that Amber’s seen therapists here and that they were no good. Tends to be common with those only experienced in anxiety and depression to not know how to handle dissociation and PTSD.
Well yeah, not every therapist does ptsd therapy. It’s been hard for my friend to find someone, since you always have to ask, and most actually don’t. Luckily, in Germany, you can (once you have exhausted all other options) go to a private therapist and still have your insurance cover it.
Finding a PTSD therapist who is any good at PTSD is akin to finding the proverbial needle. I was diagnosed in the 90s but I’m still looking for a therapist I can afford.
They probably aren’t. A therapy practice is typically a totally different track from academia. Psych professors can do research, they can write books. Maybe they can design studies, maybe they can teach. They probably have no experience supporting an individual patient through their problems.
Wait, you mean that people who study singular pieces the same immensely broad field don’t share a hive mind? Next you’re gonna tell me that not every chemistry major can cook.
Lol it’s the total opposite here. Jamaica’s a small place and the psych community is even smaller so if you study psych and also get therapy, prepare to see some familiar names and faces. My abnormal psych professor was also the psychologist who gave me my last two psychoedu evaluations.
Ironically one of my meanest professors was a psychologist teaching a therapy and counseling course .-.
Nah. They just learn to imagine rejection earlier. Interestingly, you also get people who are confident that they can override such rejection and will happily decide you’re their friend now and that they can dictate your life.
It’s … not better.
Sirksome
I also feel like people in general become more wary of others that the innocence of childhood doesn’t have.
you can but depending on the situation/guarded the other person is, it’s hard as an adult.
at the very least it’d be nice for a mutually informal thing towards coworkers like , “don’t resent me because we’re both stuck at this shitty job/have to at least tolerate each other “
I mean, as adult me I’m not going to consider someone my friend just because they asked to be friends. But I’m likely to take it as a sign of earnest intent towards friendship and I may well reciprocate those intentions.
It’s actually how I ended up with my core friend group as an adult. I’d apparently made an impression on a couple of people at an event I was attending, they came up to me and basically said “hey, we think you’re cool and we could potentially be friends, do you wanna hang out?”, we did indeed hang out for the rest of the day, and we’re still friends years later.
So at the very least “you’re cool, wanna hang out” is an effective place to start.
It makes sense for DoA as it excites in kind of timeless nether-void, but it is crazy how many shows, books, etc that are supposed to be set in modern times just decided that the pandemic didn’t happen in their universe. I guess its hard to write an exciting story about how your main cast stayed inside for two years making homemade sourdough while the antagonist was stuck in quarantine. (Though it would kind of be funny to have a whole special about Batman and Joker dueling on twitter over vaccine conspiracy theories.)
I really liked Grey’s Anatomy’s take on it. They did a whole season that was All COVID All The Time, which I (smartly) skipped at the time then later went back and thoroughly enjoyed. Now every episode opens with “this is a fictional universe where the pandemic is over, but IT’S VERY MUCH NOT, PLEASE GET VACCINATED”
Max
The Good Doctor had several episodes that were all pandemic and then stopped. Freddie Highmore appeared an basically said “We don’t want our show to get sucked into the garbage dump that is real life at the moment, so we’re going to stick our fingers in our ears and pretend it’s not happening.” I might have paraphrased him a little.
Covid sucks.
I do get it from just a logistical level. There was just so much uncertainty about what exactly was going to happen with this, and if you’re planning out stories that are going to released several months away… it’s hard to really incorporate it because you have no idea what the world’s going to be like at that point and… it’s going to dominate stories if you do include it.
That said, it was interesting to see how the webcomics Something Positive and Real Life did incorporate the pandemic into things, because it was very on-the-go slice-of-life storytelling that could react to such things.
Also? Kinda curious if we’re going to start seeing new shows and films where they can acknowledge it in a more passive manner. Like “Sorry, Bob’s not coming in for a while, got COVID” as an excuse for a character being missing for a couple weeks…
Wait so Amber won’t shake some one’s hand, but she’ll totally spend a whole night getting covered in the blood and tears of a dozen criminals?
Also: I go to a small college in a pretty small town, but I always thought the amount of crime Amber deals with on a college campus seemed kinda crazy. I mean is their Admissions Department getting its mail mixed up with the local Juvenile Detention Center?
tbf, that was amazigirl/she was diassociating but amazigirl does wear gloves/i assume she wiped down/was able to sanitize afterwards as opposed to just crashing in her bed right after breaking someone’s nose lol
It’s weird because it took me a minute to even figure out what connection you were making there. She’s not thinking about germs, but about social interaction.
As for the crime, it’s the size that’s throwing you. IU has some 45K students. She’s probably run into a couple dozen mostly petty criminals. That’s not really a lot.
I kinda relate to Amber in this strip. I’ve never asked to make friends with people, and most of the friends I’ve made either I had similar nerdy interests as them, or they were neurodivergent like me. And I’ve come to realize that some of the people I thought were my friends in middle and high school probably weren’t actually very friendly towards me.
I love how Booster is now able to talk with Amber knowing how to not scare her away. Their relationship is growing so well and she needs to have friends who are able to talk with her and make her talk back. I just hope they will help each other.
I am the opposite of Amber. I need verbal that I am friends with a person or I will assume I am seen as an annoyance who people need to be polite to because of social obligations.
88 thoughts on “Friends”
Ana Chronistic
“I mean, who do you think I am? Shiki Granbell? I can’t just ASK people to be my friend… then actually be friends!”
Cattleprod
Huh, I think that’s the first time I’ve seen anyone reference Edens Zero.
Doctor_Who
Amber: So it’s like sending someone a friend request but…analog? Is this a hipster thing? Is vinyl involved?
Decidedly Orthogonal
Ugh. Hard-copy.
StClair
“Keyboard. How quaint.“
The Wellerman
Booster is so willing to be light on her social batteries.
How lovely. ?
Leorale
Right? This is actually chill, and respectful of boundaries, and I like it.
Dara
Yes, this is one of the few times they haven’t annoyed me. I will give them this. Good boundaries respect this time.
Needfuldoer
Respectful of boundaries? Who is this character and what did they do to Booster?
RassilonTDavros
Yeah. I’m looking forward to this friendship, romantic or not.
Suet
No psychoanalysis inbound but… let us see those memes.
Thag Simmons
And Booster has a link to the cast!
Potentially a second depending on what’s happening with their twin.
Doctor_Who
Carla has now reached the playing-Careless-Whispers-on-an-anachronistic-boombox-outside-their-window stage of “Pay attention to me!” with BosterTwin.
Sporky
The Legend of Booster: A Link to the Cast
Ryek Hvek
I think Booster is doing some reverse-Vulcan hand maneuver in the second panel.
Taffy
Oh, when Booster does it, it’s endearing, but when I do it, it’s “parasocial” and “weird”.
The Wellerman
Hey now, what’s “parasocial” and “weird” anyway?
If you ask me, social relationships are like electronics — they gotta evolve to be lighter and more accessible to all kinds of people, no?
True Survivor
I disagree. Smuggled cell phones into prisons is a real security problem in the US prison system and inmates need positive social interactions more than pretty much anybody (not that they are likely to get it in prison. Whose idea was it to rehabilitate criminals by taking all the people in society who hurt others so bad they needed to be separated from it and then packing them like sardines into a small windowless room together?)
PirateTawnee
The US prison system has nothing to do with rehabilitation and lots (all?) to do with legalised slavery and profit. (kinda like many other US systems, but I’m reaching now, so I’ll shut up.)
True Survivor
I always knew the St. Louis Department of Parks, Recreation, and Forestry was up to no good.
The Wellerman
Uh, I don’t see how prisons are relevant to the point I was trying to get across? Still good points tho, what you said is still valid either way.
Like, neurodivergents can benefit from social relationships as much as neurotypicals, but being forced to do them “normally” and at “normal” frequency can make them less enjoyable or even inaccessible to us, you know?
Joy
Prison security is a bad thing?
Taffy
I think the point was more that inmates are so desperate for interaction, they’ve made phones one of the most popular things to smuggle in, which is absolutely a security issue. I’d want a phone too, if I was bunked with Stabby Carl. Security is good, obviously, but I do think we could stand to ease up on people who are most likely just down on their luck and made one wrong move too many.
Joy
Yeah :3
Inahc
iirc, US prisons have also turned visitation rights into a profit machine, charging exorbitant fees for family to call/message/visit someone who’s in prison. why profit off just the prisoners when you can profit off everyone who cares about them too? ?
EAG46
If any of Booster’s psych professors are actual therapists, they need to introduce one of them to Amber ASAP. And maybe to the rest of the characters.
hazel
Walky has already said that Amber’s seen therapists here and that they were no good. Tends to be common with those only experienced in anxiety and depression to not know how to handle dissociation and PTSD.
RedCat
Well yeah, not every therapist does ptsd therapy. It’s been hard for my friend to find someone, since you always have to ask, and most actually don’t. Luckily, in Germany, you can (once you have exhausted all other options) go to a private therapist and still have your insurance cover it.
Opus the Poet
Finding a PTSD therapist who is any good at PTSD is akin to finding the proverbial needle. I was diagnosed in the 90s but I’m still looking for a therapist I can afford.
Doctor_Who
So far the teaching staff we’ve met enough to become familiar with are Leslie, Professor Brock, and Robin, with (former) TAs Jason and Penny.
My point is, don’t assume the faculty has it together any more than the students at this school.
Thag Simmons
I would not assume competence on the part of the Psych professors here.
Leorale
They probably aren’t. A therapy practice is typically a totally different track from academia. Psych professors can do research, they can write books. Maybe they can design studies, maybe they can teach. They probably have no experience supporting an individual patient through their problems.
Jamie
Wait, you mean that people who study singular pieces the same immensely broad field don’t share a hive mind? Next you’re gonna tell me that not every chemistry major can cook.
RedCat
cook meth or cook in general
missilentmurmur
Yeah, like, I have to specify every single time that I’m the academic kind of psychologist, and nobody understands what I’m trying to say.
Nova
There’s a scene in Treasure Planet to this effect.
“I’m not a doctor! Well, I am a doctor, but I’m not THAT kind of doctor. I have a doctorate, it’s not the same thing.”
It goes on, but I don’t want to accidentally imply uselessness about YOU while quoting someone being self-deprecating. Still a good scene.
zee
Lol it’s the total opposite here. Jamaica’s a small place and the psych community is even smaller so if you study psych and also get therapy, prepare to see some familiar names and faces. My abnormal psych professor was also the psychologist who gave me my last two psychoedu evaluations.
Ironically one of my meanest professors was a psychologist teaching a therapy and counseling course .-.
Sirksome
Shaking hands. What is this the 1950’s?
Reltzik
Or 2019?
Sajuuk-Khar
These fuckin’ nerds ♡
RassilonTDavros
…Wait, is asking to be friends with someone a thing you can just do? Have I really been imposing my friendlessness on myself all these years?
BBCC
You totally can! Most kids do at some point. As they get older people just….stop. I guess they feel childish? IDK.
Jamie
Nah. They just learn to imagine rejection earlier. Interestingly, you also get people who are confident that they can override such rejection and will happily decide you’re their friend now and that they can dictate your life.
It’s … not better.
Sirksome
I also feel like people in general become more wary of others that the innocence of childhood doesn’t have.
anon
you can but depending on the situation/guarded the other person is, it’s hard as an adult.
at the very least it’d be nice for a mutually informal thing towards coworkers like , “don’t resent me because we’re both stuck at this shitty job/have to at least tolerate each other “
hazel
You can and I do it often (with ppl I already talk to of course). That way I get a yes and stop obsessing over if they like me.
Andy Low
I mean, as adult me I’m not going to consider someone my friend just because they asked to be friends. But I’m likely to take it as a sign of earnest intent towards friendship and I may well reciprocate those intentions.
Nova
Yeah I’m a fan of “You’re awesome, and I want to hang out more.”
catcet
It’s actually how I ended up with my core friend group as an adult. I’d apparently made an impression on a couple of people at an event I was attending, they came up to me and basically said “hey, we think you’re cool and we could potentially be friends, do you wanna hang out?”, we did indeed hang out for the rest of the day, and we’re still friends years later.
So at the very least “you’re cool, wanna hang out” is an effective place to start.
Reltzik
But they’re funny memes. Doesn’t Amber HAVE to respond?
BBCC
Awwww! Emojis and texting! Sounds perfect for Amber.
Stephen Bierce
I was going to suggest a Thompson Twins song…nah.
Opus the Poet
Let me guess, is this it?:
https://music.youtube.com/watch?v=5igsjnSOLzg
Wraithy2773
…I mean, I haven’t shaken anyone’s hand in two and a half years.
But that’s because we went through a thing that DoA (rightfully) avoided.
True Survivor
It makes sense for DoA as it excites in kind of timeless nether-void, but it is crazy how many shows, books, etc that are supposed to be set in modern times just decided that the pandemic didn’t happen in their universe. I guess its hard to write an exciting story about how your main cast stayed inside for two years making homemade sourdough while the antagonist was stuck in quarantine. (Though it would kind of be funny to have a whole special about Batman and Joker dueling on twitter over vaccine conspiracy theories.)
SDRainbow
I really liked Grey’s Anatomy’s take on it. They did a whole season that was All COVID All The Time, which I (smartly) skipped at the time then later went back and thoroughly enjoyed. Now every episode opens with “this is a fictional universe where the pandemic is over, but IT’S VERY MUCH NOT, PLEASE GET VACCINATED”
Max
The Good Doctor had several episodes that were all pandemic and then stopped. Freddie Highmore appeared an basically said “We don’t want our show to get sucked into the garbage dump that is real life at the moment, so we’re going to stick our fingers in our ears and pretend it’s not happening.” I might have paraphrased him a little.
Covid sucks.
Wraithy2773
I do get it from just a logistical level. There was just so much uncertainty about what exactly was going to happen with this, and if you’re planning out stories that are going to released several months away… it’s hard to really incorporate it because you have no idea what the world’s going to be like at that point and… it’s going to dominate stories if you do include it.
That said, it was interesting to see how the webcomics Something Positive and Real Life did incorporate the pandemic into things, because it was very on-the-go slice-of-life storytelling that could react to such things.
Also? Kinda curious if we’re going to start seeing new shows and films where they can acknowledge it in a more passive manner. Like “Sorry, Bob’s not coming in for a while, got COVID” as an excuse for a character being missing for a couple weeks…
True Survivor
Wait so Amber won’t shake some one’s hand, but she’ll totally spend a whole night getting covered in the blood and tears of a dozen criminals?
Also: I go to a small college in a pretty small town, but I always thought the amount of crime Amber deals with on a college campus seemed kinda crazy. I mean is their Admissions Department getting its mail mixed up with the local Juvenile Detention Center?
anon
tbf, that was amazigirl/she was diassociating but amazigirl does wear gloves/i assume she wiped down/was able to sanitize afterwards as opposed to just crashing in her bed right after breaking someone’s nose lol
StClair
IMO, it’s not about the contact (or fluid exchange) but the context and symbolism. A punch is very different from a handshake.
thejeff
It’s weird because it took me a minute to even figure out what connection you were making there. She’s not thinking about germs, but about social interaction.
As for the crime, it’s the size that’s throwing you. IU has some 45K students. She’s probably run into a couple dozen mostly petty criminals. That’s not really a lot.
Needfuldoer
Minor correction: Amber spent one night getting spattered with the blood and tears of one particular criminal.
Screwball
An epic handshake emoji? So someone made an emoji of the original Predator handshake? Cause that is pretty epic…
https://youtu.be/J_zOpxcxn2Q
Darkseide
Who KNOWS where that hand has been?!
Keulen
I kinda relate to Amber in this strip. I’ve never asked to make friends with people, and most of the friends I’ve made either I had similar nerdy interests as them, or they were neurodivergent like me. And I’ve come to realize that some of the people I thought were my friends in middle and high school probably weren’t actually very friendly towards me.
SDRainbow
It took me this long to realize the chapter title is “bring me to life” and the “wake me up” line mumblety comics ago was an intentional punchline.
I retract the eyerolls and scorn!
Rabisch
I love how Booster is now able to talk with Amber knowing how to not scare her away. Their relationship is growing so well and she needs to have friends who are able to talk with her and make her talk back. I just hope they will help each other.
Local Rabbits
I am the opposite of Amber. I need verbal that I am friends with a person or I will assume I am seen as an annoyance who people need to be polite to because of social obligations.
bagge
poke
The Wellerman
-mon ?
Florence