In her head, Dina knows that the T. Rex lived in a time of no buildings, was not actually big enough to stomp them if they had existed, and probably would have had no inclination to do so even if it was capable of doing so.
In her heart, she knows this is exactly what nature intended.
This is a flashback though; did she know about HOMPK at this time?
Leorale
True, I think Dina learned about chirpy dinosaurs in the wintertime, so this flashback might’ve been before the great HOMPKening. But surely she knew about feathers.
Dina has always known about HOMPK! She was merely waiting for the proper time to educate the rest of us.
Clif
This,
And when she learned it, has nothing to do with the well established scientific fact that we know in our hearts that large dinosaurs also went RARR!
Bicycle Bill
Actually, according to Johnny Hart (creator of the comic strip B.C., dinosaurs say “GRONK!”
Clif
Who are we to argue with eyewitness accounts?
AbacusWizard
I wouldn’t recommend trusting the claims of somebody who writes a comic strip that is specifically titled “B.C.” but then makes the characters evangelical Christians.
A T. rex could probably do some serious damage to most pre-modern buildings, they were quite powerful animals, even though they couldn’t literally crush a building underfoot
Yeah, those little mammals just coming on the scene loved log cabins. Unfortunately, T. rexes could crush them without even noticing, and the little mammals would holler, “Gosh darn it! Heck!” because real cussing hadn’t evolved yet.
Clif
Eventually there were some mutant teenage boy little mammals and they would hollor “Gosh darn it all to heck!” And as a result they attracted more girls because they were cooler. And thus cussing slowly evolved over the millennium.
That’s debated.
Another hypothesis is that the development of cussing was driven by its effectiveness in parental care. mammals are famously altricial (it’s in the name) and so the development of behavioural traits allowing parents (or other adults in social species) to cost-effectively discipline their young would allow them to increase brood size and/or improve survival rates. Nothing like heavy language to impress upon your young that if they don’t fucking behave, you swear to god, you will leave their sorry ass right here in the middle of the giant fern forest and let them find their own goddamn way back to the burrow and please don’t come whining if they get lost and the anurognathids make fun of them, you ungrateful little shit.
Clif
While mammal parents are indeed altricky, such advanced and nuanced language did not and could not spring full blown off the tip of that organ manipulated by the genioglossus, the hyoglossus, the styloglossus, and the palatoglossus; rather such language required time to evolve and was readopted by exasperated parents in whatever state of advancement cussing had reached at that time.
I have made my case and submit the present debate to due review by our peers (fellow internet randos) to evaluate our respective claims on the basis of the usual criteria, viz,
1. Ockham’s various hair removal implements
2. Confirmation biases
3. Cool-soundingness of science-y jargon
4. Personal sympathies.
hey just like that big, pet praying mantis i dreamt about last night!
*sigh* why no intelligent, domesticated praying mantises reality
why
Clif
As soon as we finish backbreeding chickens into pet dinosaurs we’ll get right onto domesticated giant praying mantises that can be trained as guard mantises to bite the heads off intruders.
Plaaaa
If historically inaccurate dinosaurs and large mutant Praying Mantis are what you want, check out Primeval.
Wow, I’m surprised that Becky wants both of her parents to see Dina and accept that she’s dating. Her mother I could understand wanting to share Dina with her but why toedad?
I wonder, does she believe her dad is in hell or heaven? Personally I’d put money down on hell if I believed in it.
King Daniel
Becky’s actually talked about it a few times in the past—she doesn’t believe in the existence of hell, and believes her father would at least be able to remain in contact with her mother in the afterlife.
Kyrik Michalowski
That’s a pleasant way to look at things. If that is how she’s taking it, then good for her.
Although her mother was obviously significantly less awful than her dad, I get the impression that she still has a pretty complicated relationship to her memories of her as well. It’s probably something she was already used to thinking about by the time her dad died, and it’s probably less black and white than ‘Dad bad Mom Good’ for her
My assumption is that Becky’s statement is a bit backwards… She wanted to give Dina an idea of what her parents were like rather than the other way around.
I read it as an unattainable wish for an accepting, non-awful, non-dead version of her parents, who would be happy to meet Dina. Because, that’s what it would take to get to share Dina with them.
She knows that they’re dead, and that this is not going to happen, of course. So she’s kinda trying to scratch that itch by stepping into a weird fundie hellscape again, but this time she’s confident, and can talk back, and the hellscape is all recontextualized by her happy relationship with Dina. That’s as close as Becky can get to her unattainable wish.
It’s sad that Becky’s wish is unattainable, but very happy that she’s having a blast with Dina, and feeling empowered about it.
My money’s down to it being an error, since while a hovertext near the beginning of this chapter joked about switching the “Jennifer” tag back to “Billie” for the duration of the chapter, both that strip and the ones following remain tagged “Jennifer”, and the current tags seem to treat “Billie” and “Jennifer” as separate individuals.
King Daniel
UNLESS…this is clearly evidence that “Jennifer” is truly Mike in disguise, as Willis confirmed so long ago!
113 thoughts on “Orphaning”
Ana Chronistic
HELL YEAH!! House
I mean, what did she expect when holding a mirror up to the people she hates the most
Carla LOVES THAT SHIT
Clif
Nah. Too fakey.
The Wellerman
A T-Rex RAMPAGE!!!!
HELL YEAH!!!!! ??? ??? ✌️?
*plays “Godzilla Bio Wars Theme” on hacked muzak*
Stephen Bierce
–followed by The Brothers Johnson “Stomp”*
Clif
Followed by Barn… Aught!
This post was found near Clif’s body that appeared to have been stomped on repeatedly by a large animal. Police have ruled his death a coincidence.
Doctor_Who
In her head, Dina knows that the T. Rex lived in a time of no buildings, was not actually big enough to stomp them if they had existed, and probably would have had no inclination to do so even if it was capable of doing so.
In her heart, she knows this is exactly what nature intended.
Leorale
She’s the common popular idea of a T-Rex! You can tell by the size and the RARRing. It’s scientifically inaccurate / very spooky!
Clif
We don’t know for a fact that dinosaurs didn’t go RARR.
They couldn’t always be HOMPKing.
The Wellerman
More often than HOMPK, they could GROWL and HISS!
AbacusWizard
This is a flashback though; did she know about HOMPK at this time?
Leorale
True, I think Dina learned about chirpy dinosaurs in the wintertime, so this flashback might’ve been before the great HOMPKening. But surely she knew about feathers.
https://www.dumbingofage.com/2021/comic/book-11/04-hompk/fowl/
Bicycle Bill
Dina has always known about HOMPK! She was merely waiting for the proper time to educate the rest of us.
Clif
This,
And when she learned it, has nothing to do with the well established scientific fact that we know in our hearts that large dinosaurs also went RARR!
Bicycle Bill
Actually, according to Johnny Hart (creator of the comic strip B.C., dinosaurs say “GRONK!”
Clif
Who are we to argue with eyewitness accounts?
AbacusWizard
I wouldn’t recommend trusting the claims of somebody who writes a comic strip that is specifically titled “B.C.” but then makes the characters evangelical Christians.
ahecht
Not to mention the upright posture.
Clif
The one you just mentioned?
Kyrik Michalowski
Dina carries the spirits of dinosaurs with her at all times.
Thag Simmons
A T. rex could probably do some serious damage to most pre-modern buildings, they were quite powerful animals, even though they couldn’t literally crush a building underfoot
Clif
Buildings were smaller back then on account of the Earth being younger.
StClair
What about a log cabin?
Clif
They were also smaller in the time of dinosaurs.
BarerMender
Yeah, those little mammals just coming on the scene loved log cabins. Unfortunately, T. rexes could crush them without even noticing, and the little mammals would holler, “Gosh darn it! Heck!” because real cussing hadn’t evolved yet.
Clif
Eventually there were some mutant teenage boy little mammals and they would hollor “Gosh darn it all to heck!” And as a result they attracted more girls because they were cooler. And thus cussing slowly evolved over the millennium.
BarerMender
:))
milu
That’s debated.
Another hypothesis is that the development of cussing was driven by its effectiveness in parental care. mammals are famously altricial (it’s in the name) and so the development of behavioural traits allowing parents (or other adults in social species) to cost-effectively discipline their young would allow them to increase brood size and/or improve survival rates. Nothing like heavy language to impress upon your young that if they don’t fucking behave, you swear to god, you will leave their sorry ass right here in the middle of the giant fern forest and let them find their own goddamn way back to the burrow and please don’t come whining if they get lost and the anurognathids make fun of them, you ungrateful little shit.
Clif
While mammal parents are indeed altricky, such advanced and nuanced language did not and could not spring full blown off the tip of that organ manipulated by the genioglossus, the hyoglossus, the styloglossus, and the palatoglossus; rather such language required time to evolve and was readopted by exasperated parents in whatever state of advancement cussing had reached at that time.
milu
I have made my case and submit the present debate to due review by our peers (fellow internet randos) to evaluate our respective claims on the basis of the usual criteria, viz,
1. Ockham’s various hair removal implements
2. Confirmation biases
3. Cool-soundingness of science-y jargon
4. Personal sympathies.
The Wellerman
OK, who else here also thinks Dina would absolutely LOVE the Emmy Award winning show Primal? ??
Clif
It depends. How accurate were their dinosaurs?
Rabisch
They are not accurate, but they are amazing, intelligent and have feelings.
milu
hey just like that big, pet praying mantis i dreamt about last night!
*sigh* why no intelligent, domesticated praying mantises reality
why
Clif
As soon as we finish backbreeding chickens into pet dinosaurs we’ll get right onto domesticated giant praying mantises that can be trained as guard mantises to bite the heads off intruders.
Plaaaa
If historically inaccurate dinosaurs and large mutant Praying Mantis are what you want, check out Primeval.
S.R.
Nothing to say that a T-rex wouldn’t get some enrichment out of crushing things!
RowenMorland
We need some art of Dinah and Vanessa of Something Positive, happily destroying cardboard cityscapes together.
Kyrik Michalowski
Wow, I’m surprised that Becky wants both of her parents to see Dina and accept that she’s dating. Her mother I could understand wanting to share Dina with her but why toedad?
Reltzik
To rub it in his face.
… or, you know, to part of a larger fantasy in which she has a healthy relationship with a non-wacko father.
Opus the Poet
Non-wacko and alive father. You know so she’s not-an-orphan?
Reltzik
Has = present tense = still alive. … or a ghost, or watching from heaven, but in those cases Becky wouldn’t need a Hell House as a substitute.
King Daniel
Hovertext is presumably from Becky’s POV, given that it answers this exact question.
Kyrik Michalowski
I wonder, does she believe her dad is in hell or heaven? Personally I’d put money down on hell if I believed in it.
King Daniel
Becky’s actually talked about it a few times in the past—she doesn’t believe in the existence of hell, and believes her father would at least be able to remain in contact with her mother in the afterlife.
Kyrik Michalowski
That’s a pleasant way to look at things. If that is how she’s taking it, then good for her.
Clif
To taunt him with it.
BarerMender
Look, dad, at the fine young pussy I’m getting. See you next Thanksgiving. Enjoy your AstroGlide.
Doctor_Who
As a giant toe, perhaps he would naturally approve of quality stomping.
The Wellerman
In her heart, she really really really wishes things could have been different, even tho she knows it wasn’t likely to happen.
Thag Simmons
Given the context I think “accept that she’s dating Dina” is optional at best
Needfuldoer
I think that’s the whole point re: Toedead. He encountered Dina a couple times and was… less than accepting.
https://www.dumbingofage.com/2015/comic/book-5/04-walking-with-dina/evilutionist/
https://www.dumbingofage.com/2015/comic/book-6/01-to-those-whod-ground-me/deceptress/
(They were in a grand total of 20 strips together, but he was unconscious for half of those because hammer.)
Seralyna
Although her mother was obviously significantly less awful than her dad, I get the impression that she still has a pretty complicated relationship to her memories of her as well. It’s probably something she was already used to thinking about by the time her dad died, and it’s probably less black and white than ‘Dad bad Mom Good’ for her
Segnosaur
My assumption is that Becky’s statement is a bit backwards… She wanted to give Dina an idea of what her parents were like rather than the other way around.
Leorale
I read it as an unattainable wish for an accepting, non-awful, non-dead version of her parents, who would be happy to meet Dina. Because, that’s what it would take to get to share Dina with them.
She knows that they’re dead, and that this is not going to happen, of course. So she’s kinda trying to scratch that itch by stepping into a weird fundie hellscape again, but this time she’s confident, and can talk back, and the hellscape is all recontextualized by her happy relationship with Dina. That’s as close as Becky can get to her unattainable wish.
It’s sad that Becky’s wish is unattainable, but very happy that she’s having a blast with Dina, and feeling empowered about it.
Clif
I like Becky’s ability to focus on what’s important.
Kyrik Michalowski
Becky’s no fool, she had to know what was coming and she went through it just to prove a point… and also to let Dina destroy some of it.
AbacusWizard
Ahhhh, the motive becomes clear!
AeromechanicalAce
In theaters next week. DinaSaurus Destroys Fundieville!
The Wellerman
You are all gonna LOVE the DOA game I’m working on, i can just tell.
Owlmirror
This is the third comic to have “bille” rather than “jennifer”.
Meaningful, or mistake?
Owlmirror
I mean, since all of the “billie” tags were switched to “jennifer”, back when.
Clif
This was before she was Jennifer.
Needfuldoer
And after!
King Daniel
My money’s down to it being an error, since while a hovertext near the beginning of this chapter joked about switching the “Jennifer” tag back to “Billie” for the duration of the chapter, both that strip and the ones following remain tagged “Jennifer”, and the current tags seem to treat “Billie” and “Jennifer” as separate individuals.
King Daniel
UNLESS…this is clearly evidence that “Jennifer” is truly Mike in disguise, as Willis confirmed so long ago!
Adam Black
that usually means they are .
milu
“Usually”…???
Clif
Close. I prefer the triple feature.
Coming this Halloween:
The Orphaning
When DinaSaurus Ruled the Earth
Ruthless in Indiana.
Clif
Which was supposed to be a reply to AeromechanicalAce above.
Mollyscribbles
I’m suddenly reminded of a Jurassic Park fic I read a while back that was set at the Creation Museum.
milu
Hahahahaha
Kitschensyngk