Wait, so it’s not fueled by potato chips? Well, shit.
Marsh Maryrose
Magic is fueled by bees. It is known.
That’s why there is so much less magic in the world now. We’ve got to do something about the epidemic of bee colony death if we want magic to be restored to the world.
Not sure how I messed up the tagging… That should read:
Apparently bees defy the laws of aerodynamics (so long as you pretend they fly like planes and not like mini-hurricane generating insects) so this seems legit…
TRANSMIT – initiate the Cool Walkerton sequence – RECEIVE – initiate the Dumbiverse Variant protocol – SCREEECH! – First rule of motorcyclin’ is don’t make it awkward – DOWNLOAD initiate the Bartender Mockery cadence – WITNESS – Sally Walkerton
Mckyrrosi
I’ve played Minecraft, and can confirm, Bees are indeed a legitimate source of Majiks.
abysswatcher1993
Magic is either the product of sadness and madness (Adventure Time), advanced technology (Third Law of Clarke), an art/science/chaos thing (The Witcher), or something SpongeBob discovered below a well.
Clif
What does it say when the SpongeBob theory makes more sense?
Schpoonman
“Are you ready, kids!?”
Annonymouse
EYE EYE Captain – The only pirate that didn’t need to wear an eye-patch
Yeah. That’s weird. The point of the books is that Quentin’s kind of a dick but the tv series makes it so that he has to be in order to express his true authentic soul. I say creative types shouldn’t be allowed to make movies.
Clif
On the whole, I believe Hollywood takes your advice to heart.
Annonymouse
If they had a heart, or a brain or hadn’t substituted sheer unadulterated audacity for courage.
She DID have the reality-warping powers…but she wanted to get caught. The reality-warping powers came into play when the police arrived and treated her appropriately.
^ THIIIIIIIIIIIS. She’s a black girl who robbed a store in Indiana with a knife, and she’s not dead. That was the start of her journey into reality-warping. :p
Annonymouse
^^^ This makes me sad and confused on many different levels.
I first misread that as India, then my brain said no, that is more a middle east thing, then my brain updated and said no, girls are not allowed out of the house in the first place.
Also, unfucking him would mean he could get his job back.
Madock345
He lost his job based on an accusation with no proof, the fact that it was true is just a coincidence. Unfucking him would change nothing
Needfuldoer
Do we even know Jason lost his job as a TA? I thought the board just has hearsay from Penny, who admitted she made it up “for funsies” after she got caught, thinking he’d never do it. Even if the board starts asking questions, it’s not like Sal would narc on him.
Hasn’t he just been assuming the worst from the beginning?
Drake
Jason just doesn’t intend to fight the charges because they ARE true. He has a sort of sense of honor that wouldn’t allow him to lie on that.
Reltzik
He’s been a no-show for a few days now AND the department knew enough to have a sub TA there for the first day he was gone, so yes, he’s lost his job.
Sol Karas
I believe he was put on suspension or something up until the tribunal or w/e? It’s been a while, but I don’t think it’s been long enough in-story for the hearing to even happen.
Jon Rich
It hasn’t, but he’s not trying to fight the charges because they are true, even if Penny said it just for the purpose of being an asshole. *He* knows that he actually did it, and he can’t bring himself to lie about it to defend himself. So he isn’t even going to try.
In the words of the immortal Bob Dylan, to live outside the law you must be honest.
It’s not legal for Jason to work at an off-campus job in the USA, and it’s also not legal for him to work as a bartender in Indiana. So he’s not about to have his cover blown by an obviously underaged patron at the bar.
Do we know he has a work permit restricting him to campus jobs (is there even such a thing?)?
BBCC
A student visa might restrict him to campus jobs.
Marsh Maryrose
Most foreign students attending US schools are in the US on either an F-1 or a J-1 visa. Both of those visas permit on-campus employment, subject to prior approval and with numerous restrictions.
If Jason has been fired from his TA job, he doesn’t lose the visa but he doesn’t gain the right to work off-campus. In fact, by accepting off-campus employment, he has put his visa status in jeopardy.
Which is not to say that it couldn’t happen. It could, and he might get away with it indefinitely. But current F-1 or J-1 visa holders should consult a qualified and experienced advisor before following Jason’s example.
Marsh Maryrose
Crap. I meant to delete “J-1” from my above post, as the J-1 is a very different sort of beast with lots of variations, many of them not necessarily involving on-campus employment. But the same principle still stands: when you’re on the US on a student visa, you cannot do any paid work that is not approved in advance.
CJ
Thanks for explaining. Never thought that students visa could forbid you to hold the jobs necessary to pay for your tuition.
Needfuldoer
Oh he F’d-1 alright.
Reltzik
ARGH! I’m imagining a Clippy slipshine now! Ctrl-z! CTRL-Z!
113 thoughts on “Scrawny”
Ana Chronistic
probably Melkhiresa’s influence
/just played Unavowed
/stll playing, actually
/bartender 4 lyfe
Doctor_Who
Shame Sal didn’t know how to warp reality when she was younger.
Could have just entered that convenience store and let the clerk voluntarily empty the register for her.
C.T Phipps
As the Magicians say, magic is fueled by pain so Sal learned it that way.
Tacos
Wait, so it’s not fueled by potato chips? Well, shit.
Marsh Maryrose
Magic is fueled by bees. It is known.
That’s why there is so much less magic in the world now. We’ve got to do something about the epidemic of bee colony death if we want magic to be restored to the world.
Miri
… Apparently bees defy the laws of aerodynamics () so this seems legit…
Miri
Not sure how I messed up the tagging… That should read:
Apparently bees defy the laws of aerodynamics (so long as you pretend they fly like planes and not like mini-hurricane generating insects) so this seems legit…
With the text in brackets linking…
test
not someone else
I think they prefer to be called The Buzzing…
StClair
Their wisdom flows so sweet. Taste and see.
Abel Undercity
TRANSMIT – initiate the Cool Walkerton sequence – RECEIVE – initiate the Dumbiverse Variant protocol – SCREEECH! – First rule of motorcyclin’ is don’t make it awkward – DOWNLOAD initiate the Bartender Mockery cadence – WITNESS – Sally Walkerton
Mckyrrosi
I’ve played Minecraft, and can confirm, Bees are indeed a legitimate source of Majiks.
abysswatcher1993
Magic is either the product of sadness and madness (Adventure Time), advanced technology (Third Law of Clarke), an art/science/chaos thing (The Witcher), or something SpongeBob discovered below a well.
Clif
What does it say when the SpongeBob theory makes more sense?
Schpoonman
“Are you ready, kids!?”
Annonymouse
EYE EYE Captain – The only pirate that didn’t need to wear an eye-patch
CleverTrousers
Yeah. That’s weird. The point of the books is that Quentin’s kind of a dick but the tv series makes it so that he has to be in order to express his true authentic soul. I say creative types shouldn’t be allowed to make movies.
Clif
On the whole, I believe Hollywood takes your advice to heart.
Annonymouse
If they had a heart, or a brain or hadn’t substituted sheer unadulterated audacity for courage.
jeffepp
Sal is the Fonz. Once she became cool, it all came to her.
C.T Phipps
She sacrificed Ethan to the Chaos Gods. He just hasn’t realized he died.
Jamie
I feel like calling Mike a god is a bit much.
Clif
Agreed. Mike is his own category.
C.T Phipps
I wouldn’t be surprised if Mike knew Sal and encouraged her to act out like Satan.
Daisy
She DID have the reality-warping powers…but she wanted to get caught. The reality-warping powers came into play when the police arrived and treated her appropriately.
Betty Anne
^ THIIIIIIIIIIIS. She’s a black girl who robbed a store in Indiana with a knife, and she’s not dead. That was the start of her journey into reality-warping. :p
Annonymouse
^^^ This makes me sad and confused on many different levels.
I first misread that as India, then my brain said no, that is more a middle east thing, then my brain updated and said no, girls are not allowed out of the house in the first place.
Catullus
Strangely, I think this might be the healthiest interaction these two have ever had with each other.
C.T Phipps
Sal is happy she can hate him directly now.
BBCC
Pfft, teaching job never stopped her before.
Passchendaele
sal, beer ninja
C.T Phipps
The rules don’t apply to Sal because she is Sal.
Tacos
So, what, she’s Seto Kaiba? Does she have an inordinate obsession with Blue-Eyes White Dragons?
Annonymouse
Are his eyes blue? On my monitor they all look black.
Mind you he is very white and he could be a Mason.
Stephen Bierce
*lines up some pub rock on the jukebox*
ShinyNeen
In a disastrous twist, Jason turns out to be the only one in the bar that is immune to Sal’s coolness.
(Well I guess alt text implies Billie is there but it’s not like she would stop Sal from drinking)
C.T Phipps
Yes, Sal, insult the girl you’re attracted to. That works.
C.T Phipps
Jason. Sadly, the above is more interesting.
Jon Rich
To be honest, I think Sal would take it as a compliment.
DailyBrad
What’s she going to do, unfuck him? I don’t get the impression there’s much of a future there, regardless.
MatthewTheLucky
Also, unfucking him would mean he could get his job back.
Madock345
He lost his job based on an accusation with no proof, the fact that it was true is just a coincidence. Unfucking him would change nothing
Needfuldoer
Do we even know Jason lost his job as a TA? I thought the board just has hearsay from Penny, who admitted she made it up “for funsies” after she got caught, thinking he’d never do it. Even if the board starts asking questions, it’s not like Sal would narc on him.
Hasn’t he just been assuming the worst from the beginning?
Drake
Jason just doesn’t intend to fight the charges because they ARE true. He has a sort of sense of honor that wouldn’t allow him to lie on that.
Reltzik
He’s been a no-show for a few days now AND the department knew enough to have a sub TA there for the first day he was gone, so yes, he’s lost his job.
Sol Karas
I believe he was put on suspension or something up until the tribunal or w/e? It’s been a while, but I don’t think it’s been long enough in-story for the hearing to even happen.
Jon Rich
It hasn’t, but he’s not trying to fight the charges because they are true, even if Penny said it just for the purpose of being an asshole. *He* knows that he actually did it, and he can’t bring himself to lie about it to defend himself. So he isn’t even going to try.
Reltzik
“So, wait, how’s this supposed to work?”
“Basically we do the mirror of the last two times. Every time I went in last time I have to pull out instead and vice-versa.”
“Eh, sure, why not, I’m game.”
“Also, we have to switch out the hate for happy.”
“Nope, that’s a dealbreaker. Bye!”
AutobotDen
Points to Jason for at least TRYING to be a responsible bartender.
Marsh Maryrose
In the words of the immortal Bob Dylan, to live outside the law you must be honest.
It’s not legal for Jason to work at an off-campus job in the USA, and it’s also not legal for him to work as a bartender in Indiana. So he’s not about to have his cover blown by an obviously underaged patron at the bar.
tirachokko
handing a drink over without carding will also get the establishment severely fined in some states as well. Hooray for undercover cops
Reltzik
We can be moderately certain that Sal is not an undercover cop.
CJ
Do we know he has a work permit restricting him to campus jobs (is there even such a thing?)?
BBCC
A student visa might restrict him to campus jobs.
Marsh Maryrose
Most foreign students attending US schools are in the US on either an F-1 or a J-1 visa. Both of those visas permit on-campus employment, subject to prior approval and with numerous restrictions.
If Jason has been fired from his TA job, he doesn’t lose the visa but he doesn’t gain the right to work off-campus. In fact, by accepting off-campus employment, he has put his visa status in jeopardy.
Which is not to say that it couldn’t happen. It could, and he might get away with it indefinitely. But current F-1 or J-1 visa holders should consult a qualified and experienced advisor before following Jason’s example.
Marsh Maryrose
Crap. I meant to delete “J-1” from my above post, as the J-1 is a very different sort of beast with lots of variations, many of them not necessarily involving on-campus employment. But the same principle still stands: when you’re on the US on a student visa, you cannot do any paid work that is not approved in advance.
CJ
Thanks for explaining. Never thought that students visa could forbid you to hold the jobs necessary to pay for your tuition.
Needfuldoer
Oh he F’d-1 alright.
Reltzik
ARGH! I’m imagining a Clippy slipshine now! Ctrl-z! CTRL-Z!
Delicious Taffy
It looks like you’re trying not to think about a sentient paperclip in a sexual manner. Would you like help?
Marsh Maryrose
It’s been literally decades since I thought of the old Salmon Days web series:
Hey, it looks like you’re writing a letter!
Jon Rich
Delicious Taffy, I love your comment so very, *very* much.
thejeff
Of course he also knows that she’s an incredible lightweight and he won’t be able to walk/carry her home this time, since he’s working.
Dean
Sal bought that beer in Canada and rode her bike back to Indiana without spilling a drop.
Scordo
Isn’t it 19 in canada?
Roborat
Depends on what part.
Mkvenner
In Quebec, Manitoba, and Alberta it’s 18.
@zombieundergrnd
Sal is a force of nature.
He doesn’t realize how fortunate he was to have the force with him for the brief time that he did.
Reltzik
Sal’s trick is that she’s no nonsense, zero spin, and thus has an affinity for boozons.
butts
Physics is no match for the power of biker gloves
Reltzik
The only thing that can match a biker glove is a matching biker glove.
…..
*tries to decide if that’s deep or not*
Clif
Oh, it’s deep alright. 😀
tirachokko
Oh Jason, you think you can stop her lol
Citizen Platypus