146

Shallow grave
Posted on September 30, 2021 by David M Willis
For this month's first Dumbing of Age Patreon bonus strip, patrons voted for Carla, but not Fuckface, so you definitely won't see any Fuckface!  You can read this month’s new bonus strip and the backlog of literally hundreds of previous bonus strips at the Dumbing of Age Patreon! Also, if you pledge up to $5 or more per month, you can read tomorrow’s strip a full day-and-five-minutes early, every dang night!

146 thoughts on “Shallow grave”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    That’s a curious analogy, I figured Becky wouldn’t have gotten He-Man because “only Jesus has the Power“

    1. Nono

      I’m more surprised that Becky got Facebook.

    2. tim gueguen

      I have this image of He Man being Ross’s secret fandom that he hated himself for, because He Man isn’t Christian. And of course Becky at some point found his secret stash of episodes on ancient VHS tapes, recorded off broadcast TV.

      1. Yet_One_More_Idiot

        I watched He-Man when I was a boy…but tbqh I spent a lot MORE time watching My Little Pony because my big sister hogged the remote. And I ended up enjoying it more. 🙂

    3. RassilonTDavros

      She’s probably familiar with He-Man only through having seen “Fabulous Secret Powers.“

    4. Tim

      I mean, since the timeline isn’t fixed, she could have seen either of the recent MOTU shows that have been released on Netflix.

    5. Thag Simmons

      There’s a 100% chance she’s seen the She-Ra reboot

      1. Decidedly Orthogonal

        🙂 And from there found a way to see the entire original series. Becky *has* learned to do research now.

    6. Deanatay

      He-Man DOES have a cross on his chest…

  2. Yotomoe

    You’re her lesbianest friend.

    1. butts

      les-bi-friend

  3. Kyrik Michalowski

    Alright Becky, you’ve crossed the line this time. What makes you think you are cool enough to be Skeletor?

    I’m just saying.

    1. Varangian

      Look me in the eye and tell me that Becky likes to feel good.

      That’s right, she doesn’t. She likes to feel EVIL!

    2. Kavonde

      Is there anybody in the cast who would make a better Skeleton?

      I mean, since Mike’s dead.

      1. Clif

        Wouldn’t being dead make qualifying as a skeleton easier?

      2. Needfuldoer

        Ruth could make a better skeleton, but she’s not parting out her femur collection just for that!

      3. Lars

        What does Sydney do these days?

        1. JBento

          Sydney is clearly Galasso’s Starscream, come on.

      4. Stanistani

        Obsviously Galasso!

    3. Tawdry Quirks

      I could totally see Becky doing the disturbing facts meme version of Skeletor. Someone with more money than me needs to commission that meme template.

    4. Thag Simmons

      She has a similar success rate against her nemesis.

      1. Concolor44

        HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!
        These comments are as good as the strip, and funnier!

  4. StClair

    ohhh, THIS will end well.

  5. Stephen Bierce

    “If you predicted wacky hijinks–You Made The Call!” (/Mondy Night Football theme)

  6. Dark

    Alright, Becky, you can knock off the fake rivalry schtick, it got old… Well, about 5 strips after it started.

    1. MrSmith

      Yup

    2. Seralyna

      i like it, its cute

    3. Keulen

      I was hoping she’d given that up by now, but apparently not.

    4. thejeff

      Though this variation on it isn’t as unpleasant as the direct harassment is. This comes off as more of a joke than some of the other bits.

      1. Spencer

        It just feels like the same behaviour but worded slightly differently so it’s supposed to come off as quirky exuberance instead of the outright bullying it became after the timeskip.

        Like Ruth is trying to be her old self again but every time she does she immediately deflates so we’ve got tangible proof she really can’t be that person again no matter how hard she tries.

        Becky’s a loud annoying jackass and most of that seems to stem from her belief that if she’s not constantly funny and quirky and wacky then everyone’s going to stop liking her. Come to think of it, she really only pulls back on this behaviour when she’s with Dina and Joyce, which is probably telling since she knows those two won’t ever stop loving her.

        Like for all the “rivarly” I do think Becky does kinda like Dorothy. Still jealous but I think she does appreciate Dorothy as her own person, but because Dorothy’s at the level of “I want this person to like me” this is how Becky acts. She needs to be a funny goofy screwball to look cool and impressive, because Becky thinks that’s what will make people like her.

        1. thejeff

          Absolutely. It’s the same kind of motivation, but this expression of it is in a milder vein. Which doesn’t mean she’s changed, just that this particular bit doesn’t annoy as much.

          And I do think she likes Dorothy, however insecure she is about it.

    5. Deanatay

      Now, now, I’d much rather have Becky beating a dead horse than a live one.

      1. Roborat

        At this point, she is beating the stain on the floor where the dead horse once was.

  7. Jamie

    And there go the beans, spillin’ all over the place.

  8. Kamino Neko

    … Because of the alt-text, I am now imagining Becky as a magicianmage.

    (Yes, I understand WHY that’s the alt text…but…that’s not the association ‘nyeh’ has for me, OK?)

    1. Nayann Martinelli

      Color me curious, where does your “nyeh” come from?

      1. Clif

        Not Your Everyday Hexer.

      2. Kamino Neko

        Himiko Yumeno of Danganronpa V3.

        ‘Nyeh’ (delivered in over a hundred different ways!) is the line she says most over the course of the game. Her other catchphrases ‘I’m a mage!’, and ‘It’s magic!’ don’t even come close.

        (Sorry it took…uh…a day to respond…i slept a LOT yesterday…)

    2. Needfuldoer

      Interesting. My first thought was the ‘Scroll of Truth’ meme based off this comic:

      https://robotatertot.tumblr.com/post/156736308530/truth

    3. Spencer

      “nyeh” invokes the imagery of a different skeleton for me.

  9. Regalli

    Oh, Lucy. You had not yet encountered Becky’s Joyce Friendship Possessiveness.

    Which is good because if Becky perceived you as a serious Joyce Friend Candidate you would ALSO be filling the Jesus niche.

    Meanwhile, this is gonna be how Becky learns Joyce is an atheist, huh? Eeeeeeeeeexcellent.

    1. Steelbright

      Trainwreck city, here we come.

      If Joe ends up being the conscience of this set of shenanigans it’ll be amazing

      1. zee

        I’m excited

        1. Roborat

          Perhaps you should go to your room.

    2. A Red Balloon

      Do you want an umbrella with your popcorn?

      ’cause this can only end in the waterworks.

      1. Needfuldoer

        But popcorn is better with a little salt.

        1. Decidedly Orthogonal

          Salty sure, but soggy? We know the soggies aren’t welcome in the Williverse.

  10. DailyBrad

    The Mega Powers Unite!

    1. Slartibeast Button, BIA

      That’s the problem here. If you have two Super Jesusy friends when your team combines into a giant robot you end up with two left legs or something.

      1. Steelbright

        Instead of a fighting robot it just turns into a massive cross and sacrifices itself

        1. Needfuldoer

          Then the rest of the characters (and Sonic the Hedgehog, for some reason) all fall to their knees sobbing and repent, right?

  11. Beau Kirin Maysey

    What??? Willis??? Didnt you hear???? He-Man is no longer a part of the new Masters of the Universe show because [something something women characters] [something something liberal propaganda something]!?!?!

    1. Nayann Martinelli

      And the liberal agenda ruined one more cartoon classic, a giant achievement of writing and animation, that people have been watching nonstop since the invention of the TV /s

    2. Kyrik Michalowski

      What’s going on with Masters of the Universe? Did they remove He-Man or something?

      1. Clif

        Were they replaced with He-Woman?

        If so, let me know so that I can Google the resulting hilarity.

        1. Thag Simmons

          I haven’t seen it, but I’m pretty sure the answer is yes. Teela is the protagonist, not He-Man, I think he’s mostly dead for most of it.

        2. Sunny

          I read that He-Man is dead and everyone is angry at him for it. Something like that.

      2. Deanatay

        A lot of fans are butt-hurt because they essentially destroy the happy He-Man kingdom in the first episode. I understand their reasons for doing so – it’s hard to create a dramatic story with a Mary Sue like He-Man in the middle of it (no, NOT a Marty Stu – have you SEEN the “What’s Going On” video?). This way, they get Teela as a brooding antihero on a quest for redemption, a LOT of interesting interactions, character development, and even a surprise twist at the end. And I LIKE what they did with Orko.

        1. zee

          The only issue i have with it is the show runner was constantly on twitter like “don’t worry we’re not gonna change too much we’ve seen how that goes down with fans” and that’s kinda gross to me. Just outright lying or going back on your word.
          Also wish they didn’t…let’s say adjust the main party as often as they do bc it just doesn’t feel impactful

        2. MrSmith

          Kevin Smith is a sell out and a hack.

          He’s a millionaire many times over yet he’s willing to sell out for even more.

          He made his career going on about George Lucas and then he pulls this sort of chap?

          He wants to be part of Disney and corporate Hollywood so badly well let him and let him sink into the mediocrity he deserves but no more can he claim pop culture status

        3. MrSmith

          Chap? (Damn you autocorrect)

        4. Justnobodyfqwl

          People getting furiously heated over Kevin Smith will never not be funny. Like yeah, sure, the dude that made Mallrats has sooo much ~artistic integrity~ in the first place and he’s ~sold out~ by ~ruining~ one of the most transparent integrity-less toy commercials of the 80s. Silent Bob sure is a fatcat millionaire ruining the good name of He-Man, a franchise where 3 of it’s 6 shows came out within the past 5 years and those 3 were pretty consistently below average cartoons in the 80s and 2000s, decades pretty well known for bad cartoons.

        5. Tunasammich

          They can watch the CGI show then. It’s a pretty okay, serviceable kids show that shouldn’t offend anyone’s sensibilities

        6. MrSmith

          The 1990 series isn’t bad however it doesn’t have Alan Oppenheimer providing the voice of Skeletor which is a major negative

    3. Spencer

      I like that CG cartoon that was announced. The characters look all Joe Madureira, which I think is a good fit for He-Man.

    4. zee

      He’s still there just not the main character. There’s another new he-man series anyway if you want him as the lead

  12. BBCC

    SUPERHERO TEAM UP, SUPERHERO TEAM UP.

  13. Mel

    Oh Becky there’s a much more appropriate Masters of the Universe villain for you to be if only you watch a different show

    1. timemonkey

      Clearly Becky is Kyle.

    2. Rabisch

      Do you mean Becky is Mantenna?

  14. Slartibeast Button, BIA

    So this is a Token Friend Diversity thing then?

  15. Bicycle Bill

    Shallow grave?  I hope the funeral director tied his shoes together before he was buried.  That way, if a zombie apocalypse actually DOES happen, he’ll have a harder time becoming a walker.

    Actually, the perfect solution to disposing of Blaine’s mortal remains would have been to cremate the body, then mix his ashes into a garbage-can full of cement and allow it to set.  Then transport the cement-filled garbage can to the Atlantic Ocean, take it outside the 12-mile limit and past the Continental Shelf break, and toss it overboard.

    1. Slartibeast Button, BIA

      So when The Stars Are Right and Cthulhu Rises he has Blaine as his advisor on humanity. What could go wrong?

    2. Needfuldoer

      Drop him way out in the Pacific, where they ditch all the broken satellites from low Earth orbit.

  16. Bagge

    Only, Skeletor is gay.

    …never mind, I see it now.

  17. timemonkey

    At least she recognizes she’s the bad guy who will never win.

  18. Steelbright

    “Jesusy” is the best adjective

  19. Rikunda

    Wait till they find out it is so they can do men’s vitamins!

    1. thejeff

      Breaking gender roles! The horror.

  20. Dean

    Becky, you’re so Money Supermarket.

  21. Black Drazon

    Video Challenge: Re-voice Becky’s lines from previous strips as Skeletor.

    Bekcy: Nyeh! How about an inaugural POOP?

  22. Nayann Martinelli

    Don’t mind me, just getting the popcorn ready for the inevitable train wreck to come

  23. Yotomoe

    https://imgur.com/a/H2iWTY3
    A few days ago I asked for some Joyce/Liz ideas and AGV said to draw them sharing an edible without hands so you can thank them for this drawin’ 😛

    1. Varangian

      Oh, she’s feeling it alright ¬‿¬

      Very nice, very cute.

    2. Kyrik Michalowski

      I approve of this so hard, I’d give it three thumbs up if I could

    3. Amos Batista

      naught, as nature demands..

    4. Rabisch

      Lipgloss variant… very adorable♡.

    5. Keulen

      Very good.

    6. zee

      Oh i love this

    7. Roborat

      Very clever. This isn’t where I thought you would go with your challenge, but I like what you came up with.

      1. Yotomoe

        Really? Which way did you expect me to go with it.

        1. Decidedly Orthogonal

          Well to spit-ball, there are nibbleable parts of the human body, if you’re willing to bend the trrm ‘edible’. And from there it’s just a matter of choosing who they would share nibbling…

    8. Justnobodyfqwl

      Yotomoe you’re a delight and a half and the comment I always look forward to every night. Thank you so much for everything you do!

  24. Varangian

    Becky, Becky, Becky, you’ve got it all wrong!

    See, you’re the cooler friend who WANTS her to have a disastrous sexual awakening with you but she won’t, Dorothy is the cuter, straighter friend who she’s headed for having a disastrous sexual awakening with and absolutely shouldn’t.

    Liz is the secretly wild friend who’s either going to steal her boyfriend and break her heart OR get her into an accidental threesome for what’s arguably the healthiest sexual awakening of the three options on the table.

  25. Reltzik

    …. this last panel raises 2 questions for me.

    1) Why the hell hasn’t Becky binged Netflix’s She-Ra? Surely Leslie, at least, would have clued her in on it.

    2) Alternatively, if Becky HAS binged it, why the hell is she using He-Man analogies instead?

    1. Varangian

      This is a VERY valid question.

      Maybe Dotty has watched it too and Becky is at least cognizant enough of the show’s whole deal that she realizes terming herself Catra to Dorothy’s Glimmer raises some unfortunate red flags (i.e., a huge psychosexual obsession with Adora/Joyce).

      1. Varangian

        (They absolutely are Catra and Glimmer, though, right down to Catra’s obsession and Glimmer’s straightness.)

        1. Jeff K!

          Glimmer is bi. The creators have stated that there are no straight characters on the show.

        2. Decidedly Orthogonal

          Why do I feel like that’s not a particularly important detail? At least not for a pre-pubecent target audience. (although I don’t know if that is /still/ the target demograpic). Also, while there may serve a purpose in excluding a categorization to point out how it don’t feel good to be excluded, I suspect those who who benefit the most from such a lesson are least likely to actually absorb. And lastly, if it *is* an important detail, considering the size of the cast, it’s just statistically weird. Is there something in the water? Or is She-Ra’s dimension like the rainbow neighborhood of the universe?

        3. Justnobodyfqwl

          1) It kind of is an important detail- not to get into spoilers, but a queer relationship is the emotional centerpiece of the show and a very large plot important event within the show

          2) It kind of sounds like you must not know a lot of gay people irl, where a common joke is that (especially around the high school/college age) not only do gay people tend to group together and stick together, they often did so before they knew they were gay

    2. Thag Simmons

      Too close to home, perhaps

    3. Deanatay

      She probably appreciates that Skeletor is flagrantly gay, while his frenemy He-Man is still in the closet.

      1. zee

        Adams in the closet. He-man’s very presence destroys all closets in range

    4. Segnosaur

      Could the use of He-man instead of She-ra be for the audience’s benefit?

      I never watched either cartoon (not exactly my timeframe), but I know enough about Masters of the Universe to know who He-Man/Skeletor were. On the other hand, Other than the name She-Ra, I know nothing about that cartoon. (Who is even the main villain in that comic?)

      Because He-man just seems to have a bigger place in popular culture, it would make more sense to use that as the reference in the comic, rather than She-Ra (who might be a better fit, but the joke would be lost on more readers.)

  26. He Who Abides

    Rebecca: aggressively lesbian, to the point of being obnoxious about it.

    Also Rebecca: chooses to identify with a character who undoubtedly had testicles at one point in his life, at least until someone punted them into orbit (that’s why he sounds that way, right?), rather than the actual lesbian villain in the next show over.

    1. He Who Abides

      Also, this would make Liz Evilseed, right? Or was there another villain that caused He-Man and Skeletor to team up?

    2. Thag Simmons

      Skeletor (probably) isn’t the character she most identifies with in the entire franchise, just the one she likes more of the two she brought up, which isn’t surprising

    3. Jamie

      Why are you calling her Rebecca, exactly?

      1. Decidedly Orthogonal

        Dude’s channeling Baloo from Talespin?

      2. anonymsly

        She won’t call Dorothy by her right name, therefore He Who Abides won’t use Becky’s either?

  27. Evil Fairy

    I now find myself in need of an image of Dorothy and Becky rocking semi-tasteful MotU cosplay.

  28. Endplanets

    Liz: Should we skip class?
    He-Man: no. we must obey the rules. and be responsible.
    Skeletor: Hell yea we should skip! Let’s get wasted and go streaking!

    1. StClair

      God help meBY THE POWER OF GRAYSKULL, I heard that with the original voices. -_-

  29. MrSmith

    How has no one ever told Becky to just STFU, just one time.

    1. Clif

      Why? Does it seem to have any effect whatsoever?

      1. He Who Abides

        It’d be nice to see someone say it, is all. I’m actually surprised that no one has yet.

        1. Spencer

          She pretty much only hangs out with Joyce and Dina, who think the world of her, and Dorothy, who constantly needs to fix and capitulate to other people because she’s a doormat.

          She’s mean to Joe too but Joe mostly deserves it and it’s less Becky being a jerk to him and more that she reacts to him that way because of how he used to be.

        2. Clif

          Dorothy a doormat? We really don’t read the same comic.

  30. darkoneko

    …do they even team up in the serie ? that seems unlikely

    1. He Who Abides

      They teamed up to fight Evilseed, in the OG series.

  31. BenRG

    Huh… Do you think that Becky maybe has some jealousy issues here?

    1. Clif

      It’s a stchich and yes.

      1. MrSmith

        It’d be nice to see some growth is all, she’s a one-note character at the moment

        1. MrSmith

          I apologise.

          This comment should be applied to your comment above at 2.17 am, not this one.

    2. PB

      Hmmmm… naaah. /s

  32. Needfuldoer

    Becky spent the time skip catching up on the pop culture she missed, now that there’s nobody to stop her.

  33. Spencer

    Get with the time, Becky. The gays are about She-ra these days.

  34. Spencer

    I read once that Skeletor being so goofy and harmless in the original MotU show led to kids writing in letters asking for Skeletor to win for once, so the writers started doing episodes where he’d team up with He-Man so Skeletor could accomplish something.

    I think that’s actually really cute. I miss that kind of cartoon villain whose consistent failures engender love from the audience, like aw bless Skeletor keep trying lil’ dude, you’ll kill He-Man one of these days.

    It’s a weird effect that I think has been kind of lost for too long, but villains are characters too. They aren’t just vectors of negative qualities for the protagonist to overcome, they can be endearing in their own right. Beast Wars Megatron was a goober with a rubber ducky and a theatrical speech pattern who was so bad at his job Rhinox once defeated him and the Predacons by farting really loudly in their direction. He was a charismatic leader who was a joy to behold, and when he actually won? It was hype as hell! He constantly got close to perfect and total victory and outright stumped the Maximals when he destroyed their last hope of contacting Cybertron in Season 1, and every other time required some desperate last second intervention.

    1. temperaryobsessor

      Nowadays it seems like its more likely to lead to an actual redemption and/or be borderline parady but they still have that.

  35. Rabisch

    Dunno, but Dorothy’s last sentence seems a bit threatening to me… Her revenge will be terribile. Liz will pay for making Joyce skip class!!!

  36. sdrainbow

    On the one hand, oh boy “Dottie” rivalry rears its head.

    On the other, genuinely excited that becky’s feelings for Joyce may be coming to the fore

  37. Chris (the other one)

    We’re missing a superhero here, but there’s no door for them to appear behind…ya know, for drama’s sake.

  38. Arianod

    I think I’ve missed the part where Liz was “super jesusy”?

    1. Keulen

      Apparently she shares Jesus memes on Facebook to keep her stepmoms off her case.

    2. eh, whatever

      On Facebook, to keep her stepmom calm.

  39. Sombrero

    I didn’t know I badly want a strip titled “Super Jesusy”.

  40. Keulen

    DoA Book 12: I’m Skeletor You’re He-Man

  41. Geneseepaws

    Good points, all. But the thing that disturbs me most is that Becky is blaming Blain for kidnapping anyone, when her own Toedad was a serial kidnapper.

    1. Jamie

      Blaine kidnapped Danny. Via trickery rather than physical coercion, but nevertheless.

      That’s how Blaine decided Amazi-Girl was his enemy.

  42. ValdVin

    I already accept that knowing nothing about Transformers will hobble my understanding of Willis’ work. Now I can add the He-Manverse to that list.

  43. Carla's #2 Fan

    I mean, Dorothy does have the hair for it

  44. Diane

    Man, Liz must do a very good job faking being a Christian on Facebook if Becky believes she’s her Super Jesusy Friend™.

    1. Sombrero

      On the other hand, Skeletor would definitely be fooled by a poorly faked version.

  45. davidbreslin101

    Re. the news post: “Lookin’ for Fuckface” is Samuel Beckett’s most famous play….

  46. Coco Pommel

    Becky Projecting that she wants Dorothy to die, if that’s taken in context of the new series….

  47. Decidedly Orthogonal

    This can just trail the comments. I’m tickled that DyWillis acknowledged the server clock lag. ❤?

    “you can read tomorrow’s strip a full day-and-five-minutes early”

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