138

Gay nerd
Posted on July 11, 2022 by David M Willis

138 thoughts on “Gay nerd”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    guess she’d better start working at actually channelling Kylo Ren then

    …

    maybe try not to visualise BJ as Rey tho

    1. Ana Chronistic

      “I’m being torn apart. I want to be free of this pain.”

      1. Kimi

        Dye her hair black because you know Emo Ren doesn’t have true black hair with both of his parents being variations of brown. Find a burned helmet of her mother’s father to talk to.

        1. Schpoonman

          Can we just do Clint’s skull?

        2. Kimi

          I think most of the audience would be up for a deceased evil mother’s father.

        3. Laura

          Evil mother? Who is evil and how?

        4. Clif

          This is strictly interpretation, but my bet is the correct reading is
          evil (mother’s father)
          rather than
          (evil mother’s) father.

          And no, let’s settle for Schpoonman’s suggestion.

        5. Laura

          Got it. That makes more sense. Thanks, Clif!

        6. Kimi

          Sorry. Improper grammar there on my part.

  2. Darkoneko

    Embarrassing my arse.

    1. davidbreslin101

      I feel like I’m an embarrassment to my arse sometimes….

  3. Stephen Bierce

    I Hate Myself For Loving You…

    1. True Survivor

      Great song.

    2. Nova

      Excellent choice.

    3. woobie

      +1

  4. chuckroast

    ruth, i’ve come to the future. don’t do this. if you do, she’s just going to get ten times more obnoxious!

    1. Doctor_Who

      “You’ve got to come back with me! It’s your girlfriend, Ruth, something’s gotta be done about your girlfriend!”

      “Why, does she become an asshole or something?”

      “YES!”

      1. Wraithy2773

        See, now I’m just picturing the Doctor saying that.

        …Capaldi, of course, he seems the most comfortable with someone being called an asshole.

        1. GholaHalleck

          A smidgen yes.. Something about using the word in every way possible in the show he did before Dr Who.

        2. Afa

          It’s all that residual Malcolm Tucker energy

      2. Bryy

        I love that Marty’s response is not “is the world ending?” but rather a more down to earth “do we become jaded?”.

        1. woobie

          uhh, was the version you saw censored?

        2. StClair

          I think Bryy was talking about the scope of Marty’s worries about the future, not the language he uses to ask.

        3. Bryy

          You would be correct.

    2. thakoru

      It’s funny how much one wrong preposition can change the meaning of a sentence. Now instead of bringing a warning FROM the future, you’re basically doing this: https://xkcd.com/630/

  5. True Survivor

    I…I don’t get it. Why does Ruth want to hate Billy? Is Billy being out right cruel here or is she just joking around with Ruth? I am very confused.

    1. Caro

      From what I can tell, their relationship was based on that antagonism, and while Billie has the heart to keep it up, the spark’s gone for Ruth, and the cruelty is getting… well. Cruel.

    2. tbf

      P sure Ruth has to end it because it’s an unhealthy relationship but she still loves Jennifer very much.

    3. angie

      I’m guessing she’s probably going to break up with her for “her own good” or something like that and hating her would make it easier, but I don’t think we know for sure yet

      1. Sirksome

        That’s what I think too. I’ll add that I think Ruth has shown more than a little self loathing to justify the idea of Jennifer being better off without her.

        1. Bryy

          This makes a lot of sense. Good lord, the meltdown from being dumped by someone she views as inferior must have been EPIC.

        2. Nova

          Yep. Anticipating a similar vibe as a classic post-rejection line, “Well you’re fat anyway.” With “fat” replaced by some other pejorative.

        3. SuperZero

          “Nerd,” maybe?

        4. Bryy

          Billie thinks nerd is a swearz, so sure.

        5. Needfuldoer

          You say that like we haven’t been getting glimpses of it for the last two years.

          (The meltdown is ongoing.)

    4. huehuetotl

      I think it’s because Ruth knows they should break up, and that would make it easier.

    5. CallynD

      Billie’s being a dick. A pretty big dick at the moment. It’s not fun to love a dick and not be able to tell them to go fuck themselves some of the time. And I don’t think Ruth currently has it in her to have that kind of relationship, nor does Billie seem to be able to turn it down a notch or two.

    6. ischemgeek

      Tbh, I think it’s because Ruth’s parents were killed by an alcoholic drink driver and Billie’s an alcoholic with a DUI.

      1. Laura

        Acting like a dry drunk now.

  6. Sirksome

    Hating someone’s generally bad right? Is hate what the kids are into these days?

    1. True Survivor

      If they have Facebook, probably?

      1. Norah

        I didn’t think Kids nowadays used Facebook?

        1. woobie

          Twitter.

        2. Darasara

          The one I know toady only seem to use TikTok, SnapChat and InstaGram.
          All of those have CamelCase names, right?

        3. Clif

          RiGht.

        4. Shadowsnail

          All the cool bullies are on HateMongr.

        5. Clif

          So FaceBook and TwitTer could make a comeback?

    2. Mr D

      Well, you tell me how much we’ve cheered for Hatefucking in Willis comics.

      1. Clif

        What? Never?
        Well, hardly ever.

    3. The Sad truth

      i mean, its the only explanation why people still post stuff Twitter.

    4. Keulen

      Depends on why you hate them. If you hate someone for being different from you, that’s probably bad. If you hate a person because they’re an asshole, I don’t see a problem with that.

  7. Nono

    I mean, they’ve only been dating what, a month? Two max? That’s still well in the ‘puppy dog bubble’ phase of the relationship where it can be hard to hate anything about the other person.

    1. Akane

      And yet Billie manages to be needling at best and outright cruel at worst, rejecting even a bit of tenderness.

      1. Bryy

        I often forget how short of a timespan this comic has actually covered, and how that informs the behavior of these people.

  8. Laura

    I don’t like this. I know calling each other gay can be part of a loving relationship (my S.O. & I call each other “ho-mo-sexual”) but Billie really seems to be using it vindictively, like an insult. “I’m too cool to say I love you, but you’re totally gay for me. Barf. Gross.”
    That’s how I’m reading it anyway. As if Billie’s desire to be alpha bongo was winning out over Ruth’s desire to be tender.

    1. Axel

      I don’t know if I’d use the word vindictive, but I still agree.

    2. Sirksome

      I’m still unsure on the intent behind this interaction. I do think Jennifer was legitimately upset by the nerd accusations because she so heavily values social status and titles, but the antagonism of dialogue is more ambiguous because they both enjoy pushing each other’s buttons. Ruth was smiling the whole time. Jennifer saw that and knows Ruth’s feelings aren’t hurt. If Ruth is feeling anything beyond that they need to have a conversation on the boundaries of this dynamic. But I don’t think that’s the reason Ruth is upset here.

      1. Nathan

        I think Jennifer dislikes emotional vulnerability, so she deliberately teases in ways where it’s unclear what she means. She likes to have plausible denia-billie-ty

        1. Laura

          Ouch, that pun was punishing.

    3. sanvi

      For me this does not come off as cruel, but I think that is informed by a history where sometimes I joke MORE about potentially sensitive subjects, because it helps reassure me that those aren’t actually currently sensitive. For me using gay as faux-insult would be kinda fun, more than anything I get what you’re saying, though! There’s a lot of room for interpretation here.

  9. Sirksome

    Well I’m not gonna call it yet but my theory that Ruth initiated the breakup is looking bright. Still wondering if the motive is in anyway alcohol related. Ruth drinking in the future is too loaded a development to not pay off in some way.

    1. sanvi

      Yeah that prediction feels really on point still ; I was thinking that reading this comment

  10. Schpoonman

    Obligatory “Fuck you, Jennifer.”

    1. Kirtro

      Can present Ruth slam Jennifer on to the floor again? Please?

    2. The Wellerman

      Ooooh, can I join too?

      Obligitory, “Fuck you, Jennifer”, as well! ??

    3. Sirksome

      I’m confused why is Jennifer the asshole here? This is how they treat each other. Ruth has said worse to Jennifer.

      1. Nathan

        In this scene, Ruth said she loved Billie with no asshole bits other than gentle ribbing about her being a nerd. Then Billie is an asshole. So she’s the asshole here, in this scene specifically.

        1. Clif

          But Ruth called her a nerd.

      2. Bryy

        This is post-medication Ruth.

      3. Schpoonman

        Exactly what Bryy said. Ruth is very far out of the “lesbian suicide pact” part of their relationship and while she clearly enjoys being antagonistic occasionally she can see what’s wrong with the way that their relationship went earlier, where they would just end on being shitty to each other and then go about their days carrying that shittiness. It’s a terrible way to live and I’m glad Ruth is seeing that, that closing with affirmations of love are important. I’m incredibly vanilla so please take the entire shaker, but their relationship seems to have had qualities of S&M and those of you in the comments who are more kinky can hopefully back me up on the fact that after-care is really fucking important.

        The problem is that Jennifer has refused to read every single memo Ruth has sent her that she’s trying to be healthier, including the time where she quite literally said “I need to quit drinking,” where Jennifer’s reaction was to storm off and then break into Ruth’s room later that night.

        1. The Wellerman

          Ah, a very much overlooked detail, good point Schpoon!

          BTW would you be in the mood for a Perfect Cell Dina any time soon? Like, to go with Saiyan Joyce? Or other cast members DBZ style? Just asking.

        2. Sirksome

          I can’t really agree with this. It puts the burden on Jennifer to be some kind of mind reader. Ruth has not communicated to her at all that she desires any change in their dynamic beyond cutting the drinking, and they both have re-committed to that after Ruth confronted Jennifer on sneaking booze. Other than that, this is how they interact and Jennifer has been just as capable of showing tenderness and support including reassuring Ruth during a moment of imposter syndrome post kidnapping incident. This is only like two days post time skip. I doubt much has changed between them to warrant thinking Jen is being overly cruel here. If Ruth wants Jen to stop jabbing at here or enabling their shared suicide pact which is mostly performative at this point she actually needs to say that, not just be sweet and hope Jen gets it. She instigated most of Jennifer’s sourness in this interaction to begin with.

        3. Needfuldoer

          Ruth needs Jen to be a mind-reader?

          What about the whole “we need to stop drinking” argument in Book 9 (across But The Sun Still Shines and Vote for Robin)?

          https://www.dumbingofage.com/2019/comic/book-9-comic/04-vote-for-robin/decade/

          https://www.dumbingofage.com/2019/comic/book-9-comic/04-vote-for-robin/refusing/

        4. Sirksome

          As you’ve referenced they had a conversation about the drinking which is my whole point. Jennifer’s being criticized or insulted here for being a jerk to Ruth but this is the dynamic they enjoy together and Ruth has not communicated any discomfort in it. Quite the opposite actually because she’s been shown to Nelly this trait in others. She was more interested in Daisy and ultimately Jason, when they got angry and showed her they had attitude or snark.

          So the peeps saying “Fuck you” to Jennifer I ask why? Cause she hasn’t really done anything to hurt Ruth here unless they just don’t like the character, which is fair.

        5. Seralyna

          Completely agree. Maybe it’s just my autistic side of it where like, i’m very very clear that if someone wants me to act a specific way, I need to be told (and vice versa) but like, Interpersonal relationships are complicated!! If you don’t tell people what you want, and start to develop grudges based on that lack of communication, that is your issue.

          To be clear, I think I also don’t think Ruth is doing anything wrong here. To me it seems like she has changed enough that she thinks the relationship isn’t going to work, and is internally concerned that she might have to cut it off because of this change in dynamic.

        6. Laura

          Which might be why she looked concerned when Billie said , “you can slay me later” (paraphrase). Because Ruth knew there wouldn’t be a later. She wanted one last happy date and envisioned parting on good terms at the end of it. But that wasn’t going to work out that way.

          My guess is Billie blows up at the party and dunks on everyone else in the hall on her way out. Maybe she dunks on Amber, calls her some bad name, and Walky doesn’t immediately side with Amber over Billie, causing Amber’s and Walky’s breakup.

          Just a thought.

  11. Cliff

    This feels like one of those moments where the comic’s paused reality is inadvertently showing its age. Billie’s behaviour is quite fine, albeit a little bongoy, for the time when the comic started but 10+ years later, it’s coming off a lot worse.

  12. Mr. Random

    So she’s definitely still thinking about the drunk driving stuff Jennifer did a year ago.

    1. Laura

      What makes you say that? I don’t follow.

      1. Mr. Random

        My thought process is like this:
        Years ago, Ruth’s parents died in an accident caused by a drunk driver.
        Billie in her senior year, got into a drunk drivinf accident herself.
        In college, Ruth targeted Billie because of that.
        Eventually, they started dating in what can only be considered a mental cascade of fucked up. But aldo kinda cute at times.
        Ruth grows to love Jennifer.

        And here we see that she laments how she can’t hate her even a little.

        My guess is that Ruth can’t let go of some of the stuff Jennifer did in the past, (one of the themes behind Jennifer preferring her real name instead of her nickname.) And wants to break up with her because of that. Even though she doesn’t want to.

        1. Laura

          Yeah, that makes sense.

          My guess is that Ruth was initially attracted to Billie BECAUSE of Billie’s alcoholism: because Billie reflected something that Ruth hated in herself (and possibly in her father, too, if her father were also alcoholic, as Ruth’s grandfather seems to imply). Being attracted to Billie would be a kind of reaction formation from that hatred — like a way of proving to herself that if Ruth can love an alcoholic, that Ruth might also be lovable herself, even though Ruth is an alcoholic too.

          Like Billie said to Ruth, “We’re both poison. Neither of us deserves anybody. Just each other.”

          Kind of the same way that Walky and Amber bonded over Garbage Ruth, or how Joyce and Ethan bonded over their shared fear and rejection of their own sexual desires. What people want to squash in themselves is what attracts them to others who share the similar characteristics. “Feels so good being bad,” and all that jazz.

        2. Laura

          Garbage “ROOF,” not Garbage Ruth. Aphasia!

  13. RassilonTDavros

    ?Got a funny feeling

    I don’t hate you anymore…?

  14. Blibdoolpoolp

    Love can be such a complex and even toxic emotion, it really looks like Ruth’s feeling that.

  15. pyrock_mania

    This reads to me as Ruth beginning to realize that what she and Billie had wasn’t healthy (though she may still be at the “I’m doing something wrong” phase). At this point she’s been doing therapy and medicating, things that are supposed to “fix” her. If fixing her brain made her unable to keep up the foundation of hate in their relationship, that means the hatred was unhealthy/needed to be fixed, right?

    Though the pessimist in me is now convinced she’s making the wrong assumption here and we’re about to see her dangerously self-medicate to try and bring back her hate and blow everything up spectacularly.

  16. Taffy

    Tsundere isn’t hot, it’s hurty

    1. Nova

      Hurty things can be hot. Sometimes they’re the hottest of all the things.

      1. :0

        It can be, but it gets old very quickly.

        1. Nova

          For you. Not necessarily for everyone. 😛

    2. Needfuldoer

      It can be, if all parties involved know where the line is.

    3. zee

      Counterpoint
      Tsundere is very hot and also cute

  17. Slash Wombat

    Um. Are Ruth’s meds interfering with her ability to provide Billifer the hate that she needs?
    … sort of the emotional equivalent of floppy dick, I guess… been through similar.

  18. Dr. Gonzo

    Jennifer needs to realize and accept that who she was in high school no longer matters.

    1. Bryy

      Yup.

      I also think we as humans take for granted the INCREDIBLY TRAUMATIC SHIFT going from middle school to high school and then high school to college is.

      1. Clif

        I would have stuck in LIBERATING for TRAUMATIC, particularly for the switch from high school to college. But not everyone is the same.

        1. Laura

          Big frog in little pond, meet huge lake.

          I used to study the photo directory every single day, just so I would have the slightest chance at getting my classmates’ names right. Didn’t work when they had similar hair, though. Similar haircuts were my nemesis.

        2. Bryy

          It’s traumatic in the sense that we’re expecting to adjust to such huge changes in our education.

      2. Twig

        Elementary school to middle school too.

  19. hazel

    I think this is Ruth worried about Billie still romanticizing death and being suicidal. To me it makes it all make sense.
    Before the skip: “I’m a dumpster and she’s my fire~”
    Halloween: “After [tonight], I promise you can kill me any time you want.”

    Ruth knowing Billie might be stuck in bad habits because of what they used to be together.. well, that’s one reason for initiating a breakup without hate.

    Food for thought. This makes me sad.

    1. The Wellerman

      I just consumed said food for thought, and the result was a horrible premonition — whatever is in the back of that hall is evidence of a suicide attempt.

      1. hazel

        The hall? I don’t understand the context, sorry.

        1. The Wellerman

          This hallway, the forbidden one:

          https://www.dumbingofage.com/2020/comic/book-11/01-this-bright-millennium/forbidden/

        2. powerpowerpow

          I’m still holding onto hope that the room at the end of the hallway was a one-off joke.

        3. Fay

          I’m 90% sure that’s just a joke about how Willis doesn’t ever acknowledge the existence of those rooms, despite the fact that they have to have people in them.

        4. Clif

          It’s where Mike lives when he’s not being Jennifer.

  20. Gojira007

    So I notice a lot of folks seem to be missing the implication of the alt-text here? I dunno, I rarely try to get ahead of the comic on this stuff so don’t take this as My Definitive Theory, but the Kylo Ren Quote in question is about his having already MADE a choice but fearing he doesn’t have the courage to actually see it through; in that context, I feel like Ruth’s last line here is her wishing she hated Billie at all because she’s ALREADY decided to break up with her and thus wishing that she disliked Billie, literally at ALL, so that doing so felt in some way easier for her.

    1. Schpoonman

      I love that line so much, which is why I want to both hug and strangle the writer who came up with it because they could have tucked it away, but no, it was given to Jar Jar Abrams.

      Kylo’s “redemption” could have made Rise watchable for that scene alone if it had been earned in any way, shape, or form. But no, he jobs to Rey (it’s forgivable in The Force Awakens because he’d taken the bowcaster bolt earlier and he’d just fought Finn, whose waste is yet another of the Sequel Trilogy’s sins), takes Leia with him(???), and then wakes up after Rey heals him apparently completely free of Sidious’s influence.

      I hope giving the Sequel Trilogy shit, but primarily Rise, has as much longevity as Prequel Memes have had.

      1. Schpoonman

        Oh, right, commentary on the comic itself. Like I said above, Ruth likes the affectionate antagonism but Jennifer just wants to be toxic, and I think you’re right that this moment was the “Well, we’re clearly going two different directions and it’s time to let go before one of us is torn in two” realization for Ruth.

        God, watching Jennifer melt down when she gets dumped is going to be cathartic. I’ll feel bad for Ruth, though.

      2. Gojira007

        See, and hilariously enough I found its reprise in “Rise” absolutely laughable, because it misses the point of the original line. Like, right, if you were to hear A Skywalker In Star Wars say that, you would in fact ASSUME it’s about Doing The Right Thing No Matter How Hard, but the TFA line works precisely because it is no less sincere an expression of The Dark Side’s conception of such an idea. Using it again for Kylo’s redemption is just Doing The Expected, which is *fine* but also in this context a lot less effective. But that’s sorta TRoS in a nutshell, so….

    2. Saida

      I always read on mobile browser and never know how to read the alt text.

      1. Schpoonman

        Tap the spaces underneath the comic on either side of the navigation buttons.

    3. Amós Batista

      Wish Ruth could be less attached to Jennifer.

  21. Stifyn Baker

    Wow. Up to this point I’d assumed this was banter, but Ruth’s reaction here suggests not. Billie’s really trying to sabotage this relationship, isn’t she? That’s some prime self-loathing right there.

    1. zee

      Still feels like banter imo, just looks like Ruth already decided to break up, for reasons other commenters more eloquent than me laid out

  22. Juanoku

    What the fuck does this mean
    Willis you ominous bastard I’m going to kill you

    1. MegaBee

      Whoa. Maybe tone it down a little.

      1. powerpowerpow

        Willis you ominous bastard I’m going to close the elevator doors while I’m inside even though I saw you walking towards it.

        1. AGV

          You’re evil!

        2. Beau Kirin Maysey

          even worse!

        3. Alex

          Well done my friend, I did not expect to be laughing at any of the comments on today’s strip.

    2. The Wellerman

      I wonder if this will get put into the moderation limbo. Only time will tell.

  23. Daibhid C

    Please consider my point from yesterday about how only one of these people is upset by their “banter” completely and unreservedly withdrawn.

    Man, Billie’s the worst.

    1. Clif

      She’s not upset by the banter. At all. She’s upset by the fact that she has to break up with the person she loves.

      Or at least that’s what she has decided she has to do.

      You’re quite free to read your own version of the comic. Because, you know, we all will anyway.

  24. Bagge

    I know this seems sad, but maybe they sort it all out.

    Ooops, no, this is a flashback so we know everything went to the toilet. Eat at arbys

    1. Clif

      Mmmm. Arbys!

  25. Unique_Passive

    Kinda seems like Ruth knows the relationship is too toxic to continue

  26. #JenniferStan

    I changed my mind, I prefer Jennifer over Billy

  27. Nicoleandmaggie

    *gently pats Ruth on the shoulder, then quickly jumps back to keep from being hit*

  28. Needfuldoer

    Aw, Ruth… 🙁

    You can do better.

    1. Clif

      You can do Jason.

      No, wait!

  29. Amós Batista

    Everthing is sad. Jennifer treats Ruth so badly, at same time she is the one who is so next to her.
    And Ruth is not any innocent after all.

    I just can’t don’t know what to think.

    1. Clif

      I believe the operative phrase is, “it’s complicated.”

  30. Caren

    Hmmm … I wonder if Jennifer/Billie’s headed towards “I’m not gay, it was just a phase/experiment/mistake”, something along those lines.

    That could explain why she starts going by Jennifer instead of Billie (a more feminine-sounding name), and ends up dating a guy who’s (I’m guessing) seen as very masculine.

    1. Laura

      Could also explain her anger at finding out that Ruth had gone home with the male bartender and had made him her boyfriend. Since Jennifer denies that bisexuality is “real,” she concludes that Ruth is either “lying” now, and dating a man just to get back at Jennifer, or that Ruth was “lying” (or “just fooling around”) back then and that Ruth’s “gay” love for Billie was not “real”.

      Could add another layer of meaning to that “I knew it” in the hallway. Either “I knew it, you never really loved me, did you,” or “I knew it, you’re not really over me, if you didn’t still love me I wouldn’t be able to provoke you to reacting with violence by pushing you back into our ‘first kiss’ position.”

      1. Laura

        When folks who fear they aren’t perfectly aligned in exactly the same spot on the Kinsey scale break up and move on, there can be that fear that the breakup had something to do with their sexual orientation, e.g., “See, I knew you’d eventually leave me for a man (or woman), it was never real at all for you, was it? Why did you lie to me?” Not espousing that point of view, it’s just I’ve had it directed towards me in the past, when dating folk who are closer to one end or the other of the Kinsey scale.

    2. Nova

      I mean, ending up dating a guy doesn’t really need explaining since Jennifer is bi rather than lesbian. Changing from your childhood nickname to using your given name also isn’t unusual in your first few years away from home (or ever).

      I’m not disagreeing that Jennifer is going through some shit right now (some of her own making and some not), but it’s always weird to me how her name change is viewed. It might be an issue, but could just as easily be a normal part of stepping into adulthood.

      That said, she has some severe internalized and externalized biphobia and homophobia. The self-hate is certainly strong with this one.

      1. Nep

        Agree entirely with your comment.

        I had enough self-awareness to recognize before I went to college that I wanted to change the name I went by. I still had people who knew me before (and there were only two!) give me weird shit for it. It’s just a name! (And that’s just for cis people.)

  31. the jighole man

    Ruth: i love you more than anything
    billie: gay nerd.

    maybe an “i love you” back would have done her some good. ya know?
    people can’t hatef*(k for the rest of their lives, they need love and support.

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