195

Dammit
Posted on April 8, 2015 by David M Willis

195 thoughts on “Dammit”

  1. Jen Aside

    “We’ve secretly replaced ALL THE SHIRTS with Leafs jerseys. Let’s see if she notices.”

    1. Kaiden

      I think Billy was too busy to notice.

      1. LittleMountain

        She’s suffering from post-nookie catatonia. She’s lucky she’s wearing anything at all.

        1. Yet_One_More_Idiot

          Onoes, now Billie will have to go back in Ruthie’s room again and get told off by Ruthie about STILL wearing the damn Leafs shirt and that’ll lead to another angry/make-up nookie session. Billie’s cunning plan for more nookie is easy to see! ;D

        2. Koms

          Your comment goes excellently with your gravatar. And yes. It will be an endless loop.

    2. Plasma Mongoose

      …and hid ALL THE PANTS too.

    3. Doctor_Who

      It’s not Billie’s fault Ruth owns like 40 of those.

      1. Architex

        For some people this really is the case. I had a roommate last year—nothin’ but plaid button-up shirts in his closet.

  2. Stephen Bierce

    “Only When You LEAF/I need to love ya”–apologies to Spandau Ballet

    1. Jen Aside

      You wanna hear my uncle’s favourite joke? …I forget how it starts, but the punchline is, “LEAF me alone! I’m BUSHED!”

      1. Captain Batson

        I assume it’s funnier when he tells it.

        1. Opus the Poet

          It really only works with the right setup.

        2. tyersome

          Ya’ll are barking mad! That is clearly a treemendously funny joke.

        3. Deanatay

          …to someone in their 70’s.

        4. Just saying

          Because you think old people are stupid or because you acknowledge the fact that as you get older you allow yourself to enjoy the simple funny things in life instead of trying to be snooty and grown up all the time? Apparently to the point of rudely judging someone for the things they find funny despite the fact that humour is largely subjective.

        5. Kryss LaBryn

          This thread sure branched out quickly.

        6. Yet_One_More_Idiot

          I’m gonna make like a tree and get out of here.

          +1 e-cookie to first person to get that ref. 😉

        7. Roborat

          Ok Biff.

      2. Knightwoolf

        Make like a tree and get the hell outta here?

      3. Corsair Caruso

        Thank you, Zuko.

      4. jpic89

        Jen, you are my favorite person on the internet right now.

  3. Tunaro

    Can ya really blame her, though?

    1. newllend(henryvolt)

      No you can’t ,I bet that sex was mind blowing.

      1. KingMabel

        I bet Ruth’s closet wall can attest to that.

        1. Deanatay

          Yay! More destroyed closets!

          Now, if only they’d break outta their symbolic ones…

          Still, good practice.

      2. LeslieBean4Shizzle

        I’m very sad that Billie/Ruth part 2 lost the vote. I really wanted to see whatever Ruth did to leave Billie looking like that.

        1. Yet_One_More_Idiot

          Maybe it’ll turn up in a later Slipshine? It wouldn’t be as current to the main story, but it would still be awesome to see… 😀

  4. Plasma Mongoose

    Billie’s new nickname is Leafs because she was blown away.

    1. newllend(henryvolt)

      A well deserve +1

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        (ノ￣ω￣)ノ

    2. Bagge

      Awesome

    3. saltchocolate

      Damn, Plasma, that was good!

    4. LeslieBean4Shizzle

      **slowclap**

    5. 6Qubed

      That is a terrible nickname and I love it.

      1. F.

        that’s what makes it great!

    6. nothri

      That poor sap.

      1. tyersome

        Listen bud, we all fall and get swept away eventually …

        1. nothri

          Are you saying she’s rooting for the wrong team?

        2. saltchocolate

          Now that’s a leaf of a different color . . .

        3. tyersome

          Wood you look at that … the puns are really phloem today … and <fake surprise> it all stems from Plasma</fake surprise>

        4. Screwball

          I’m just gonna say I’m not surprised & leaf it a that…

        5. Deanatay

          You could say she’s a ‘budding’ Leafs fan…

    7. 3Xp4t

      That may not be too farfetched. If (oh, who am I kidding: WHEN ) the rest of the floor finds out, and connects it to this shirt, she may very well be dubbed “Leafie.” Can totally see that.

      1. DarkoNeko

        …As long as it’s not leafless.

    8. FlyingFish

      Watch how she soars.

      1. Bantha

        But if she does that…won’t a Reaver harpoon impale her shortly thereafter?

        1. Just saying

          I think we can all agree that that never happened. Wash is alive and well and REAL dammit. :X

  5. Cephalo the Pod

    Maybe she can condition herself. If she gets Leaf Laid enough times, she’ll start genuinely enjoying watching the hockey team.

  6. An Average Loser

    The team goes on to win the Stanley.

    1. Bantha

      LOL. The Leafs in the playoffs? That’s hilarious 😉

      1. Opus the Poet

        Hey, it has happened before, I watched it on TV. 😛

        1. Argon

          Are you sure you were awake at the time?

        2. Opus the Poet

          Quite sure, yes. I think I was 8 or 9 then.

        3. Dellaran

          Well, there were only six teams back then, so their odds were better..

  7. insomniac

    One. Job.

    1. KingMabel

      In her defense, she was distracted

    2. saltchocolate

      In her defense, Ruth didn’t catch it either…

      1. 3Xp4t

        We haven’t seen the state of Ruth yet. She may be even more incoherent.

        1. saltchocolate

          True!

        2. Screwball

          It’s possible that to see Ruth now would involve an 18+ rating & for Mr Willis to work out how to represent brain-melted giberish…

          …not that I would complain…

  8. TheLurkerAbove

    Billie hasn’t done enough Walks of Shame to at least change out. 😛

    1. LeslieBean4Shizzle

      Billie’s Walk of Shame was interrupted by a second Walk of Shame. Ruth has invoked Shame-ception.
      Actually, I think at that point the whole thing inverts into the Walk of the Sex Goddess.

      1. Deanatay

        It HAS been suggested that she just ditch the jersey and walk back naked.

    2. 6Qubed

      I would argue that Billie’s walk of shame began the moment she stepped foot out of high school.

      1. Khrene

        Sssss! Ouch that burns!

      2. Bagge

        …out of that car wreck…

        1. neeks

          To be fair, at least she walked away from it.

        2. tyersome

          … but many leafs were killed …

        3. Gigafreak

          The bodycount was beyond beleaf

      3. Rycan

        I think there were many such walks during high school, too.

        1. Deanatay

          Many of those were probably Walks of Drunken Shame, too.

          To her credit, at least she’s not drunk for this one.

          Well, on anything besides sexual euphoria.

  9. Cholma

    Ooh, happy Billie! (for 2 panels, at least)

  10. Mattyos

    i’d like to point out she was just shaking from how good that was and all i see right now in the comments are people making bad leaf puns…

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      It won’t take long until you have more than your chloroFILL of those puns.

    2. lomie

      You could almost say she was… shaking like a leaf!

      1. Mattyos

        that was bad and you should feel bad

        1. Tacos

          I would suggest to LEAF him/her to their puns.

        2. tyersome

          Don’t needle the punsters, you’d pine away without us.

        3. lomie

          Wow these puns sure are taking root and branching out splendidly.

        4. Chris

          You could really spruce that one up a bit.

        5. Figrin

          Give it another month and they’ll be dancing around the May-ple.

    3. saltchocolate

      A leaf in the hand is worth two in the . . . uh uh, no way!

      1. tyersome

        Why are you hedging?

        1. saltchocolate

          idk *shrubs*

      2. Willoughby Chase

        Glad you twigged it!

    4. Willoughby Chase

      Don’t worry. They’ll branch out soon enough.

    5. No Name

      Well, you have to admit, it’s a lovely garden of bad puns.

    6. DarkoNeko

      hm, I think thos eeffects indicate a slow motion, rather than shaking.

    7. Deanatay

      This list is a canopy of budding Leaf punsters.

  11. Kernanator

    Oh well, I guess Billie’s gonna have to go back.

  12. Kaiden

    Billy, I think it’s time for you to get dressed.

    Unless it’s a weekend.

    Or hump day.

    Ah hell, just keep wearin’ Ruth’s clothes.

    1. David M Willis

      ha ha ha ha hump day

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Is Hump Day some kind of American holiday??

        1. LiaHansen

          nah its wednesday. It’s when you’re over the “hump” of the week.

        2. Plasma Mongoose

          I can honestly say I have never heard of the term Hump Day before today.

        3. KingMabel

          We have commercials on TV and radio based on the idea of hump day. Including one with camels involved.

        4. Dean

          For Billie and Ruth, every day is hump day.

        5. David M Willis

          It’s another word for Wednesday. It’s the middle of the week, therefore Wednesday is the crest of the week, or the “hump.” This is mostly significant to people who work weekdays but not weekends, because it means the week is halfway over, upon which time you can return to being probably drunk.

        6. Plasma Mongoose

          Thanks for that. ^_^

        7. newllend(henryvolt)

          Am I the only one who always thinks of that one Gieco commercial when I hear hump day ?

        8. Opus the Poet

          Not any more!

        9. Kelly

          >upon which time you can return to being probably drunk.

          Haha!

    2. Regalli

      Pretty sure it’s a weekend – Becky first showed up under the pretense of it being a long weekend or something, I think, so I’m assuming yesterday was Friday.

      1. Catullus

        That would be correct!

        1. David M Willis

          Yes, it is currently Saturday.

        2. Disloyal Subject

          I’m in one of those rare moments of sanity where this progression of time seems strange.

        3. Indricus

          And too early in the school year for it to already be the First of May, in which case Billie would be overdressed anyway.

        4. Opus the Poet

          I think it might be as late as the first week of October by now.

        5. John

          It’s Saturday, the last day of Week Four. Move-in day was in August, so it’s mid- to late September now.

  13. Ele

    Tell me we’re gonna get another Ruth and Billie Slipshine. Uhh… not that I’d look at such a thing.

    1. Solenoid

      No need to feel ashamed. =P

    2. LeslieBean4Shizzle

      We can only hope that Willis will take an “all of the above” approach and do a bunch of them.

      1. Rycan

        I think he’s limited in quantity by what Slipshine actually commissions.

  14. dc

    I don’t see the problem here. She can just say she stole it from billy after doing some shit that seems to matter and is wearing it as a trophy. Simple fix.

    1. dc

      RUTH. Stole it from Ruth. Not Billy. I am not very smart.

      1. Bagge

        Well, then she would have to come up for an explanation why she is not killed and fed to wild dogs. Those tings escalate.

      2. Rycan

        Well, she could have conceivably stolen it from a goat.

    2. Solenoid

      Trophy awarded for being #1 in the sack, right?

    3. Willoughby Chase

      She tea-leafed [1] a shirt? Say it ain’t so.

      [1]Rhyming slang for “theived” …

  15. Idon'tcarenomore

    Or she can just take her ass down the hall at 80mph and change it.

    1. Bagge

      That worked so well last time…

    2. Rycan

      Everyone else in the hall would get a very good view of her ass, though. Besides, the silly girl moved ALL her clothes out of her dorm room.

      1. Screwball

        TEveryone else in the hall would get a very good view of her ass, though..

        You say that like it’s a bad thing…

    3. Deanatay

      But, it smells like Ruth, now…

  16. Em

    Billie why are you so bad at this.

    “Let’s leave my RA’s room with only her shirt on and sex hair. A+ good idea 10/10.”

    However, DAMN Ruth, you must be a goddess in bed to make her look like that.

    1. Doctor_Who

      Redheads, man. Redheads.

      1. StClair

        and you’d know, right Doctor?

  17. boomwolf

    Where’s George Takei when you need him?

    1. Bill

      Happy to oblige.

      Ohhh, my.

  18. Watson The Snail

    It’s kind of funny how intense sex like theirs only manages to slightly knock her hair out of place. But you know what? I’m oak-ay with that.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      The furniture may not have faired so well…

      1. Deanatay

        Closet door. It’s been made clear, they did it on the closet door.

  19. newllend(henryvolt)

    Willis can you please explain the meaning of the new poll ? When you say “who should be a magnet for the kickstarter “, are you talking about who should be the mascot or something else?

    1. Opus the Poet

      Who’s image on a vinyl/rubber magnet.

    2. Orbit Junkie

      He’s offering die-cut magnets of several characters as kickstarter rewards, and as stretch goals are reached, he will offer more characters.

    3. David M Willis

      magnets are those things that stick to refrigerators

      i am making magnets that bear the images of dumbing of age characters

      so when i say “which character should be made into a magnet” i mean “what character’s likeness should be reproduced on the surface of a magical refrigerator object”

      1. newllend(henryvolt)

        Cool

      2. Rycan

        So, these magical refrigerator objects are stickers?

        1. DarkoNeko

          so… He’s making chick magnets ?

          …

          I’m already out.

        2. Deanatay

          That’s all you’ve got??

          – I’m drawn to this idea!
          – I’ll have a (magnetic) field day with these!
          – Maybe I should stick with refrigerator puns?
          – Feel freon to stop me any time!
          – It’ll be a cold day in Hell before I stop!
          – Ahh! I’ve been pulled back to magnet puns!
          – Eh, well, they’re both ‘polar’ anyway…

    4. newllend(henryvolt)

      After looking at said Kickstarter with plans to donate Money I found out Willis actually meant literal magnets. Finding this out I came back to comment and say never mind, but it was already to late…damn.

  20. M-M

    Things are generally pleasant in the ‘verse… *waiting for the other shoe to drop*

    1. Solenoid

      Mary’s busy holding the other shoe aloft right now. I’m sure she’ll drop it when she bothers to poke her head out and look down the hall.

  21. A Scientist

    There are so many Andrew Raycroft jokes which could be made post-coitus…

    1. A Scientist

      For those of you who don’t know who Andrew Raycroft is, he wore #1 with the Leafs, and he was not a very good goalie.

      http://www.hockeydb.com/ihdb/stats/pdisplay.php?pid=31782

      That he started 72 games for them in 06-07 may provide some context for these Leafs jokes.

      (I know, if I have to explain the joke, it’s not very good. I tell enough terrible jokes to realize this.)

    2. Willoughby Chase

      Rob Ford is a Leafs fan.

      1. Deanatay

        Leafs fans are the best Leafs jokes. *ducks fruit barrage*

      2. A Scientist

        Heh heh, Rob Ford.

  22. Ray Radlein

    That’s a two minute Major there.

  23. The Thing

    And she’s also not wearing pants.

    1. Tacos

      She wasn’t wearing pants beforehand.

      1. Disloyal Subject

        Bah! Pants are a trapping for lesser beings; Billie needs them not!

    2. Willoughby Chase

      She could put some trousers on.

  24. Kinoko

    Hee. I backtracked a page just now to check the transition between the previous and current pages, and Joyce’s face in the second panel of yesterday’s strip blends surprisingly well into Billie’s second panel face here. 😛

  25. Bagge

    Go Leafs!

  26. Bagge

    NO ONE tells an alpha bongo what to wear.

    1. Deanatay

      Yeah, bongoes ain’t afraid to show off their tympanies.

  27. Rodimiss

    I suppose if anyone asks, Billie could always make the excuse that she stole the jersey from Ruth and is now wearing it to taint the team and piss Ruth off. That is probably not the worst lie that anyone in this comic has used to cover up something.

    1. MiaKitty

      I’m pretty sure that’d be believable, to be honest. I’d buy it.

    2. Emily

      Billie’s obviously not up for thinking quickly right now.

    3. Marie

      Or even just ‘huh? I just grabbed it off the floor. Maybe it’s Sal’s.’

      Even if Ruth didn’t know and confronted her about wearing it in front of people, she could play it off as a laundry mishap.

  28. Keroshino

    Poor Billie…It was meant to be! 😀

    1. Deanatay

      It’s fused itself to her skin, now. She can never be free. One of usss….

      ….

      THEM. One of THEM! *blush*

      1. Keroshino

        (In Symbiote voice) WE ARE LEAFS!!!

  29. nothri

    Ruth just needs to make a rule that Billie isn’t allowed to wear clothes when exiting her room. Leaf problem solved and she is guaranteed to be way more cautious and mindful of other people who might be wandering the hallways.

    1. Tacos

      Pretty sure Billie exiting Ruth’s room naked would get more attention than exiting while wearing Ruth’s clothes.

  30. Bagge

    I can’t get over just how liberating it is to FINALLY see Billie happy. And happy on her own terms no less. She has tamed the local bully with her sexiness, she is genuinely in love and has awesome parties (OK – only two people, but they sure are awesome) and she can do the walk of “shame” with pride.

    …OK, there are PLENTY of problems big and small and Billie’s life style is not exactly a healthy one (as Alice pointed out in no uncertain terms), but right here, right now, Billie is yet again head cheer leader and alpha bongo and she is AWESOME.

    1. Architex

      Yes! As someone still fairly new to DoA, my impression of Billie (and Ruth as well) has been that she’s just a mean, bitter party-holic that had a hard time making friends with anyone outside of Joyce.

      Seeing how happy she’s become, in moments like this is heartwarming. I’ve really begun to like her.

      Plus, “Finally” is the shizzle.

  31. Reltzik

    You had ONE JOB!

    And you BLEW IT!

    … er, ate it?

    1. ninja_jesus

      More like THUNK’ed it, I think.

    2. Willoughby Chase

      *Get’s out leaf blower*

  32. DarkoNeko

    Looks like someone Else will need to borrow a skirt from Sal.

  33. Ember Quill

    Noooooooo my epic archive binge has finally ended! I’m all caught up!

    Also, lol, changing shirts was kind of the point of going back into the dorm room in the first place, right? Got a little distracted, perhaps? Still, I’m loving happy Billie and happy Ruth. Or, well, happier than they were before, at least.

    In fact, there’s a lot of happiness and drama-resolution going around lately. Which scares me, because I know you far too well.

  34. Martin Smith

    Two jobs if you include putting on underwear.

    1. Rycan

      Well, pants. We have no clue about the underwear.

  35. OnyxIdol

    I find Billie’s lack of discretion disturbing.

  36. timemonkey

    If she’s wearing underwear just leave the jersey on the door knob and go without.

    1. Deanatay

      In the state she’s in? What makes you think she’d remember underwear??

    2. Rycan

      The rest of her clothes are in Ruth’s room. Billie’s closet is cleaned out, remember?

  37. Toes14

    Ok, do college aged women even watch hockey? (Yes, I realize that some do, but I mean a large percentage?) And even if they do, would ones in the middle of Indiana care enough to comment about a team in Toronto? It’s not like the Bluejackets, or Blackhawks have natural rivalries with the Leafs. Redwings, maybe?

    The whole idea seems like a stretch to me.

    1. Bantha

      Don’t think the Leafs and Wings have a rivalry. Until very recently, they weren’t even in the same conference 🙂 The Penguins really don’t like the Leafs…but there’s no real rivalry there either.

    2. Maveric1984

      Ruth is from Canada, likely from the Toronto area, before she moved to Indiana when her parents died. As a Canadian, yes, she would watch Hockey.

      1. timemonkey

        I believe the point is that the others girls should notice or care.

  38. Kenjia

    It’s a common gag with NHL fans to poke fun at the Maple Leafs, no matter what team you’re a fan of. And more college age people watch hockey than some think. Doesn’t help it isn’t on basic cable unless it’s the actual Conference or Stanley Cup Finals though.

  39. LordHaw

    Billie in the Leafs jersey is certainly scoring more than the actual hockey team.

  40. segnosaur

    This reminds me of a joke I heard many years back….

    A woman goes in to a doctor’s office for an examination. The doctor notices she has a big ‘T’ imprinted on her chest. The doc asks about it, and she explains “My boyfriend plays hockey for the university of Toronto. He likes to wear his jersey when we have sex, and it left an imprint”.

    The next woman comes in for her examination. The doctor notices she has a big “W” on her chest. The doc says “Let me guess… your boyfriend goes to Western”. The woman responds “No, but my girl friend goes to McMaster”.

    1. Maveric1984

      It’s funny because I actually have heard of all of those schools, and attended one of them

    2. la6ue mous snow angel

      All the sex I’m getting is McMasterbation haha it’s funny because I’m a virgin

      1. la6ue mous snow angel

        x.x

  41. Black

    I love how people remark about her wearing this jersey, and not on the fact that she’s probably walking around in nothing but panties…

    1. Screwball

      That’s If she remembered those…

  42. Ashley

    Oh, Billie, you dum-dum.

  43. Eric

    I has a sad because this will almost definitely conclude this segment of the Billie/Ruth story before returning to Becky/Joyce/Ethan for a long period.

    1. Clif

      Predicting the Willis is always risky.

  44. Gvickers

    I have always liked JBF hair. But, it looks really good on Billie here.

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