No, he improvised a couple of names which sounded “ruffianish” to dis Sal and her apparent lifestyle. C’mon, guys, keep your eye on the big picture here: this is classic Fred-and-Ginger “fight until we kiss” behavior.
SAL: She’s nice. Smart. Respectable. These are virtues, like the ones YOU have. Maybe I’d be interested in those… IF I WERE OLD. By the way, everyone seems to be having sex except me, and I’d like to correct that. By the way, I was actually kind of impressed by how hot your ex was, and not in a lesbian way. But most importantly, “IF I WERE OLD.”
JASON: Have fun screwing some STUPID guy, then.
SAL: Your language is stupid.
JASON: Your CULTURE is stupid.
SAL: YOUR FACE IS STUPID.
yeah, they get drunk, go to vegas, and get drunk married before they even get to the kiss, or something. probably. or more likely in an alien base that just so happens to look like a vegas hotel. but then again, what do I know?
sal keeps a dorito, or a landing strip if she’s feeling naughty.
dorothy doesn’t trim hers because that’s a way of imposing unrealistic beauty standards that associate hairlessness with sexiness and when you think about it, making your crotch look like that of a pre-pubescent child is kind of gross.
billie used to get brazilians on the regular, but can’t keep up with it at school, so it’s all stubbly and irritated down there.
sarah doesn’t have time for that.
leslie keeps it natural.
ruth, strangely enough,spends time every morning carefully shaping hers into a heart with mustache scissors.
dina wasn’t even aware that pubic hair maintenance was a thing that people do.
joe keeps his short because he heard it makes your dong looks bigger.
No! Don’t do it! If you make references to one web comic in the comments section of another… Try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously and every molecule in your body simultaneously exploding at the speed of light.
CWR
Oooohhh yyyeeaahhh…great – now I’m all worked up! How am I supposed to get any work done now?
126 thoughts on “Avail yourself”
Jen Aside
Jason knows them, then?
Yotomoe
Of course he does. After all, he’s the leader.
Pyr05
The leader of the pack.
Jimmy
*VROOM VROOM*
Andrusi
You know him well.
Goldy
He’s the first member of the Thugs and Hoodlums crew
TH
Thugs and Hoodlums
mouseanderson
I think those are the two that beat him every week-end
(betcha you though I was going to say “Avail themselves”).
Axel Bordelon
COME ON WALKY! TAKE IT TO THE FRIDGE!!!
Aizat
Jason’s nickname: Fancy Man Jason.
Jenny Creed
Blade Dog is the thug an Destroyer is the hoodlum. And on tuesdays they trade.
TheGrumpyBear
It is his intention to be….
G! T! J!
T Campbell
No, he improvised a couple of names which sounded “ruffianish” to dis Sal and her apparent lifestyle. C’mon, guys, keep your eye on the big picture here: this is classic Fred-and-Ginger “fight until we kiss” behavior.
SAL: She’s nice. Smart. Respectable. These are virtues, like the ones YOU have. Maybe I’d be interested in those… IF I WERE OLD. By the way, everyone seems to be having sex except me, and I’d like to correct that. By the way, I was actually kind of impressed by how hot your ex was, and not in a lesbian way. But most importantly, “IF I WERE OLD.”
JASON: Have fun screwing some STUPID guy, then.
SAL: Your language is stupid.
JASON: Your CULTURE is stupid.
SAL: YOUR FACE IS STUPID.
Andrusi
psst
I think it was a joke
Kirt Dankmyer
Yeah, but we have to wait and see if Willis subverts that somehow. 🙂
Volkai
And then they suck face.
Roborat
Yeaaaa, that’s the obvious plot. But this is Willis we are dealing with here. he always manages to come up with a twist.
Felix Kütt
yeah, they get drunk, go to vegas, and get drunk married before they even get to the kiss, or something. probably. or more likely in an alien base that just so happens to look like a vegas hotel. but then again, what do I know?
Sparks
You spelled FAAAAAAAAAAAACE wrong.
Kernanator
Proof that Billie and Ruth are shacking up offscreen..
Resne
As if we needed proof.
waldosan
only in the best of our dreams and ships…
Blob Marley
Blade Dog sounds so nice…
Plasma Mongoose
Destroyer’s not too shabby either. 😀
Aizat
Lame! I know a Manslaughter and Bloodshed and Psycho Man Shiro.
Plasma Mongoose
Still not as Crazy Awesome as Mefisto.
Andiemus
Youfisto?
Makkabee
Oh yeah? Well I know a “Double Parks” and a “Talks in Theaters!”
Those dudes are bad-ass.
Gordon
But none of them can hold a candle to Jaywalker.
mouseanderson
What about pencil taker and dog poop leaver?
Charlie
Some of them even go to the special hell
Phillip Wilde
I know an Uncle Psycho, although he spells it Siko. Hardcore.
DaJoshMaster
Well since they’ve both been shot down, Blade Dog x Destroyer OTP.
David Herbert
Don’t worry Sal, just get Billie drunk enough and she’ll tend to your garden. Or clean pathway, depending on how you are downstairs.
ArkhamTexan
Garden, hopefully. Never saw the appeal of the latter. Unless we’re talking about STDs, since cleanliness is appreciated there.
hoop
sal keeps a dorito, or a landing strip if she’s feeling naughty.
dorothy doesn’t trim hers because that’s a way of imposing unrealistic beauty standards that associate hairlessness with sexiness and when you think about it, making your crotch look like that of a pre-pubescent child is kind of gross.
billie used to get brazilians on the regular, but can’t keep up with it at school, so it’s all stubbly and irritated down there.
sarah doesn’t have time for that.
leslie keeps it natural.
ruth, strangely enough,spends time every morning carefully shaping hers into a heart with mustache scissors.
dina wasn’t even aware that pubic hair maintenance was a thing that people do.
joe keeps his short because he heard it makes your dong looks bigger.
ethan wants to, but is nervous about it.
Phillip Wilde
Joyce is afraid to even touch that area, because she thinks it’s a sin.
And for Walky, it’s enough effort to wash regularly.
Phillip Wilde
And Mike does whatever you don’t want him to.
Roborat
Really? It makes sex more fun.
Sir Robin
Isn’t this how some pornos start?
Doctor_Who
You can imagine what happens next.
“He fixes the cable?”
Aizat
“I’m here to fix the pipes”
Yotomoe
“I’m hear to tune your piano”
Aizat
“I’m here to paint the fence”
I.care.0
“I’m here”
Roborat
I came.
.
.
.
Sorry, I will come again.
CWR
Just…give us a minute to reset the scene, wouldja? Wait outside.
Pyr05
“Your pizza is going to cost you $17.50”
Wonder Wig
“I… I don’t have enough to tip you!”
vlademir1
Wait…. am I reading Questionable content comments?
Wonder Wig
Awww yeaaaaah 😉
Andiemus
No! Don’t do it! If you make references to one web comic in the comments section of another… Try to imagine all life as you know it stopping instantaneously and every molecule in your body simultaneously exploding at the speed of light.
CWR
Oooohhh yyyeeaahhh…great – now I’m all worked up! How am I supposed to get any work done now?
Pyr05
“I’ll give you a tip, and then some!”
Jmacq1
“I’m here to teach you math.”
Too literal?
lightsabermario
After I teach you math, I can teach you religion.
Plasma Mongoose
“I’m here to shampoo your rug”.
Aizat
“We’re here for you daughter, Chuck”
Andrusi
“We’re here to rescue her from having to live with a man who thinks ‘Chuck’ is an appropriate name for his daughter.”
Phillip Wilde
“He’s dead, Jim.”
Josh
They’re all dead Dave.
Wonder Wig
Blade Dog was gonna propose. ='(
Pyr05
Destroyer is going to be crushed. He had it all planned for them!
vlademir1
Don’t worry, the devil’s threeway will make up for it all…
Plasma Mongoose
He spent $2 on one of those toy rings you get from those random toy-in-a-ball dispensers even.
CWR
He found a hammer to bust open one of those toy dispensers for only $2? That man is a discount shopping wizard!
Plasma Mongoose
Where did her cooter retreat to? Albuquerque?
Doctor_Who
Forgot to make a left turn.
Wonder Wig
Nah, that’s Bugs Bunny.
Aizat
No, Alabama.
Mkvenner
No Florida.
John
Back to Hazzard County.
N0083rP00F
Niagara Falls …. Slowly she turned … step by step … inch by inch …
Aizat