260

Exclusivity
Posted on February 28, 2015 by David M Willis

260 thoughts on “Exclusivity”

  1. Stephen Bierce

    *looks for a song about shirts*

    1. JustCheetoDust

      Petey Pablo’s “Raise Up” I’ve got nothing.

    2. saltchocolate

      She’s too sexy for her shirt . . .

      1. grantimusmaximus

        If you want to destroy my sweaterrrrrrr (woahwoahwoooooah)

      2. JustCheetoDust

        I hate how my only lasting memory of that song is Conan O’Brien playing Richard Fairbrass during the Napster trial and crying about how he’s “not too sexy to eat day old bagels.”

        1. saltchocolate

          You have my sympathy!

        2. JustCheetoDust

          “Hate” is the wrong word for that. I definitely enjoyed that part of the skit (I don’t remember them doing much with Tracy Morgan as Larry Blackmon from Cameo).

    3. CenturyChild533

      Keith Urban, “You Look Good in My Shirt.” 😉

      1. Seerow

        +1

    4. Rabid Rabbit

      https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CWrU3kROXww

      The music doesn’t start until 2:25 or so, but the whole thing is worth listening to.

      1. Fred

        You beat me to it!

    5. Jones

      Mother’s Finest

  2. Plasma Mongoose

    Walky is more observant than I gave him credit for.

    1. saltchocolate

      In the “Ten Signs Your Boyfriend May Be Gay” feature, No. 1 was “His hands and their proximity to you never.”

      1. Orbit Junkie

        This does not sound like the kind of magazine Walky would read. Remember, this is the guy who can’t have more than one pair of shoes without worrying about threats to his manhood.

        1. Bagge

          It’s a manly magazine, for men. Point 27 on the list is “he’s your friggin’ boyfriend”

        2. vic

          impresiv considering the titel had only mentiod ten signs

        3. Charlie Spencer

          Manly men don’t worry about arbitrary limits.

        4. Deanatay

          They’re also obsessed with not being gay. And, generally, not very observant…

        5. Deanatay

          And, oh yes, bad at counting.

        6. Bagge

          Manly men only get 26 on math tests, for example

        7. saltchocolate

          Bagge! Yes.

        8. Orbit Junkie

          Only if Amber wrote it.

        9. Sailor_Arashi

          Magazine? It was a buzzfeed article full of animated GIFs.

        10. saltchocolate

          Is it just me, or are those articles hellspawn from rabbit hell (by which I mean to suggest a bunny-related rate of reproduction)?

        11. Hoax

          I’ve always assumed them to be of Orky origin. Namely, Warhammer 40k orks, who are produced en masse from vats of fungal slurry.

          (Incidentally, this is how I presume internet trolls are produced, as well.)

        12. Orbit Junkie

          I don’t know, but bunny-hell sounds adorable!

        13. Ambitious

          That’s part of why it’s hell. It sounds adorable.

        14. Sailor_Arashi

        15. Sailor_Arashi

          Well…that doesn’t appear to have worked. In any case. Rabbit hell?

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9usbDsAQkrk

      2. Yet_One_More_Idiot

        And so Walky starts the discussion about exclusivity; particularly, Ethan’s hands, Joyce’s body, and the fact that the two are mutually exclusive. 😛

    2. Rycan

      He just hides it well. Why, I’ll never truly understand.

      1. Disloyal Subject

        Because the lower everyone’s expectations of you, the less work they dump on you.

        1. Plasma Mongoose

          A philosophy to live by.

      2. Marc in MN

        I think it’s because Walky is pretty comfortable being Walky and doesn’t feel the need to prove himself to others.

        Also, going around trying to prove to everyone how smart/insightful/observant you are often make you obnoxious as well.

        1. Rycan

          I don’t think Walky worries about being obnoxious…

    3. Deanatay

      Walky being observant – is this a sign of the apocalypse?

  3. SUGauthor

    Hah! Classic Walky.

  4. Kris

    Eorothy admitted it! Joyce love for the win!

    1. Kris

      Ugh. Eorothy….:|

      1. Doctor_Who

        That’s her little sister. Her parents are very well organized. She has three older siblings named Aorothy, Borothy, and Corothy.

      2. David M Willis

        1. Kris

          I feel better now. 🙂

        2. saltchocolate

          Love this thread!!!

        3. Doctor_Who

          Eeyore is my spirit animal.

        4. winter

          Which one? The Disney version that’s pretty nice? Or the book version who’s kind of a conceited dick?

          Doesn’t really matter. I call spirit animal dibs on the one you’re not using.

        5. drs

          I always thought of Eeyore as depressed.

        6. winter

          That goes without saying.

        7. otusasio451

          His voice is mine. Yes, I DO mean Optimus Prime.

        8. StClair

          I have sometimes amused myself by imagining the lines of one delivered in the style of the other.

          “Freedom is the right of all sentient beings… I suppose.”
          “One shall stand, one shall fall… probably me.”

        9. Stifyn Baker

          Eeyore is kind of a manipulative bully in the original stories. He constantly whines that nobody bothers with him, whilst making no effort to get off his arse to bother with anyone else. For an excellent insight into Eeyore’s character, read the part where he attempts to terrorise Piglet with three sticks, right up until he discovers that even Rabbit knows what an ‘A’ is. Disney sanitised him. But hey, this is the company that thought Little Mermaid would be improved by giving it a happy ending.

        10. Doctor_Lantern

          Now if we could get Eeyore in the Kraft Mac and Cheese shirt… that would be the cherry on top of this cake.

        11. The Thing

          Over 1000 hours in MSPaint.

          http://i.imgur.com/e8J8Fqp.gif

        12. Willoughby Chase

          Sad dotty is sad.

      3. Yotomoe

        http://i.imgur.com/8vs66WO.png

        1. winter

          YESSSSSS!

    2. Cale Baird

      There, there, if it makes you feel better, I once called my ex-girlfriend a different name by mistake… it’s three years later and I still regret doing that. -_-

      1. Kamino Neko

        Is that why she’s your ex? <_<

  5. cat

    Clever boy.

    1. otusasio451

      Dina suddenly jumps into the room.

      1. Doctor_Who

        She already there. She’s behind every door, always.

  6. Doctor_Lantern

    *Insert Lesbian joke here*

  7. T Campbell

    I love how everyone is so worried about this sham relationship like two hours after Joyce told Ethan they had to end their sham relationship.

    1. Kris

      It’s a lot like real life. People often don’t notice or care until it’s over, or they feel free to speak about it.

      1. Haven

        Well, none of them know it’s over, is it?

        1. Haven

          er, “do they”

        2. Kris

          Didn’t Dorothy figure it out because it was over and they were acting so coy?..eh who knows? I guess it doesn’t matter much.

        3. That Damn Rat

          Nah Dorothy missed the break-up, and then they were all too focused on Becky.

        4. Deanatay

          Dorothy just barely figured out the true nature of the relationship, give her some time.

    2. Gigafreak

      Next week on Dumbing of Age: “Yes, but does Joyce KNOW we know she knows we know?”

      1. Doctor_Lantern

        I know you know that I’m not telling the truth?

        1. Deanatay

          I don’t know that she knows that I know that she doesn’t know I’m lying. It’s simple, really.

  8. Khaner

    How did Dorothy think that people DIDN’T know Ethan was gay?

    1. brumagem

      Because Dorothy didn’t even know until Joyce not-told her before gender studies. (Because Dorothy doesn’t jump to conclusions about people based on appearances.)

      1. Birke

        Amber also didn’t know Ethan was gay. “Everyone knows he’s gay” is entertaining in fiction, but not reliable in real life.

        1. Nono

          Yeah, to my knowledge only Sarah and Walky have picked up that Ethan’s gay without being told outright.

        2. vlademir1

          I think it was implied that Mike had fgured it out, in true Mike fasion, before Ethan and Amber did. Also plausibly Jocelyne.

        3. Rycan

          Well, it’s easier to pick up on it when he’s hitting on you.

        4. Deanatay

          Let’s not forget Sarah – her gaydar is, apparently, excellent.
          http://www.dumbingofage.com/2012/comic/book-2/04-time-keeps-on-slippin/manual/

        5. Random832

          And for that matter concluding someone is gay based on their public interactions with their girlfriend is super problematic, and being right doesn’t actually change that.

        6. Rycan

          And, much as I hate to say it, so is basing it off of first impresstions, too.

    2. Stabitha

      Because Ethan hadn’t told them, so no matter how much they “know” he’s gay they don’t actually know anything until he tells them either way.

      1. Rycan

        It’s kinda like pregnancy – you can guess with varying degrees of accuracy, but it’s incredibly rude to ask, and even worse if you ask and you’re wrong.

  9. Doctor_Who

    I dunno, her arm is pretty much blocking the boobular area anyway in the wide shots. A slight adjustment or two, and it wouldn’t matter much if she were topless.

    1. Deanatay

      Willis has shown his mastery of naughty-bit obscuration in the past:
      http://www.dumbingofage.com/2014/comic/book-4/01-the-only-dope-for-me-is-you/downtime/

      1. Architex

        He does it well.

        I enjoy seeing Dorothy’s boobular areas though.

  10. Yotomoe

    I have loved this love more than anyone could love love like this love!

    1. Spencer

      Yotomoe confirmed for secretly being George Lucas.

      1. grantimusmaximus

        Nah, needs more sand metaphors.

        1. Mr k

          And Walky hasn’t killed a village yet.

        2. Razzmatazz MacKenzie

          Not that we know about, anyway.

        3. Orbit Junkie

          It happened immediately after Walky realized he could skip class. He became a living god, and a vengeful one at that.

        4. Rycan

          Came damn close to that point emotionally in It’s Walky!

        5. Sailor_Arashi

          It takes a village to raise a Sith…

    2. otusasio451

      My heart can love a lovey-love love…
      …But only…in my dreams…

      1. Poskie

        But because I talk-y with Walky-ness…
        The dreams I dream I’ll dream~

      2. Disloyal Subject

        Rather than musically, I read that Christopher Walken-style.

    3. JessWitt

      Happy Love Day, everyone! (In about six months)

    4. Doctor_Who

      You should write songs.

  11. poofdepoof

    Am I early to comment or is my computer being slow?
    But yeah, I agree with Dorothy’s thoughts re: love. Idk how I’d feel about it if I were actually in a romantic relationship, but so far it’s had a lot of meaning to me for certain family and friends.

  12. brumagem

    Goddamn autoplay video ad for Twix. (Also, dog treats.)

    1. brumagem

      (With audio)

  13. The Wizard

    I’m pretty much with walky on this one. The last panel I mean.

    1. grantimusmaximus

      Seriously. How had nobody not figured it out yet?

      1. Kennerly

        The same way no one recognizes Amber is Amazigirl. Just go with it.

      2. JustCheetoDust

        To be honest, I’m too lazy tired to find a propert TV Tropes article to link to.

      3. Sam

        Because it isn’t actually obvious to the people in the comic?

        Most of his behaviour we’ve seen is just doing everyday things around them.

      4. timemonkey

        That last panel would indicate people did figure it out. Sarah could tell instantly, Walky apparently caught on due to body language, Amber knew due to inside information….

  14. IJ

    “If I’d been more hands on”

    Gross, Dorothy. She’s not a fucking child- she doesn’t need your ‘guidance’.

    1. Yotomoe

      Dotty did say she wanted to show Joyce she “loved” her.

    2. Kennerly

      Just because you’re legally an adult doesn’t mean you’re not a child. If anyone needs guidance or they won’t survive, its Joyce.

      1. JustCheetoDust

        I like to think she could “Mr. Magoo” her way through life.

    3. Tom T.

      Dorothy and Joyce are both similar busybodies.

      1. Urukak

        They’re gettin’ “busy” with their “bodies,” am I right? Eh? Eh?

        …I’ll leave now.

      2. Bagge

        They are, and it’s really adorable. Now we are getting into a nice little parallelism where both Joyce and Dorothy have opinions about the other’s partner (but with plenty of things that doesn’t fit – especially that Joyce and Ethan already broke up)

    4. timemonkey

      Yes, yes she does. Physical age doesn’t mean jack shit, especially when you’ve been realised in an environment that actively encourages ignorance, obedience and naivite

      1. Solenoid

        I think IJ’s accusing Dorothy of being condescending.

  15. Spencer

    So was I supposed to agree with Roz earlier? Because she was such a bongo she was practically an entire drum set.

    1. MeghanTheWorldEater

      There’s no rule that states just because one is a drum they are automatically wrong.

      1. grantimusmaximus

        Just as long as we forego the beatings.

      2. Spencer

        Yeah but repeatedly attacking someone for things completely beyond their control, while said person is actively defying her family, religion, and the college she’s staying at to provide for her best friend, kind of kills any validity Roz had, at least in my eyes. ]

        1. Doctor_Lantern

          Agreed!

        2. Solenoid

          Being rude and having bad timing doesn’t make you wrong. It just makes you a jerk. There are kinder ways that the “there are probably people you could go apologize to” truth bomb could have been dropped. Instead, Roz took the fire and brimstone approach. Admittedly, Joyce may be used to that approach, but it typically comes out of the mouths of people who hold views entirely different from Roz’s.

        3. Spencer

          It’s not that I think Roz is wrong, I just don’t think she’s in any place to judge Joyce, let alone after she expressed legitimate horror at the injustices LGBT kids have to face. She’s mad at Joyce because she didn’t change her mind fast enough, or that it had to be changed at all, and that’s just silly.

          Every single one of us has, at some point, held terrible views that we needed to grow out of. Are we supposed to feel guilty for the rest of our lives because we used to be ignorant? Because we were given the wrong answers?

        4. John

          Roz doesn’t know about Becky’s whole situation. As far as Roz knows Joyce is all talk no walk.

        5. Opus the Poet

          Problem is Roz had no way of knowing any of that.

        6. Spencer

          Neither did Dorothy when she was judging the hell out of her over her sex tape. And Dorothy was equally as wrong then as Roz is about Joyce now.

    2. Riku

      What’s bongo mean here?

      1. MeghanTheWorldEater

        I literally can’t type what it means cause it will auto replace with bongo…
        -whispers- It’s the B-word

        1. Nono

          Batarang?
          Bigfoot?
          Bananahammock?

        2. Doctor_Lantern

          I’d like to think Banana-hammock is in fact the real B-Word.

        3. John

          Bothriospondylus?

        4. Rycan

          Botulism! No, wait. Bulimia?

        5. Sailor_Arashi

          BANGARANG!

        6. ninja_jesus

          BANGARANG JOYCE BROWN

        7. Willoughby Chase

          BOOGALOO!

      2. Spencer

        A few weeks ago so many people called Roz an epitaph for a female dog that the site now auto filters it into “bongo.”

        1. JustCheetoDust

          *epithet

        2. Time Sage

          Should filter into “Badonkadonk” so it still starts with a B and is a silly word for a semi-rude thing.

        3. Willoughby Chase

          So bongo is worse than *unt??

          Whod’ve thunk

        4. Rycan

          More like we weren’t using conga, since Americans consider it a grave insult for reasons that escape me (and I’m American!)

        5. taekwondogirl

          Maybe because it’s another sling at female anatomy? Iunno, a lot of swearing is implying something negative about being female or feminine. Like son of a bongo as an insult to a dude is not insulting him, but instead finding a way to insult the mother. The only real male equivalent is dick. Asshole is a nice, gender-neutral insult.

        6. Sailor_Arashi

          So far as I’m concerned it just *sounds* awful. It’s one of those words that just feels bad in the mouth. I wonder if it still would if I didn’t know what it meant.

      3. Bo Lindbergh

        Writing witch instead of bi­tch is offensive to witches; thus bongo.

        1. Sailor_Arashi

          It’s a good thing we care about witches more than we do ethnic Sudanese (or equatorial Africans…or antelope…).

        2. Deanatay

          interesting that the filter didn’t catch that one…

        3. John

          Could be the quotes.

        4. Rycan

          No, I think there’d have to be an intentional dodge.

        5. Joe

          Yeah, apparently there’s a non printable character after the “bi”, in this case a soft hyphen, or unicode 0xC2AD.

          Which is clever, but a little non comunity minded.

    3. Kathleen

      I think the part of Roz’s speech Dorothy is referring to is how Roz called out Dorothy for not doing more to change Joyce’s beliefs.

      1. Kamino Neko

        Which can only be correct if she was correct about the rest of it, too.

        Which, by Word of God, she was.

        Roz’s problem was tone and post-rant hypocrisy. That does not change that what she said was true.

        Rightfully criticize her for being rude. Don’t pretend that invalidates her point.

        1. Spencer

          I just think it’s ridiculous how Roz decided to make her point. Nobody asked her to treat Joyce like a hero, nobody asked her to comment on Joyce’s viewpoint, and then she outright blames Joyce for what’s happened to kids who get thrown out to the streets. At the risk of getting memed, not all Christians are responsible for the others actions.

          What *was* her point? That the plight of LGBT kids is awful? That it shouldn’t be ignored? Yeah dude, that’s what Joyce had just realized. It’s a little late to start moralizing at her when she’s actively rejected the terrible parts of her religion that she didn’t even know existed.

        2. Kamino Neko

          Joyce has actively rejected a terrible part of her religion that she quite definitely did know existed, she just didn’t think it was terrible until it came home to roost. Thinking of those issues as external to her is a good way to avoid having to examine the other parts and make sure they’re consistent with her inherent goodness.

    4. John

      If Roz had told Joyce off a week ago, or even a couple days ago, she would have had a point, but she perversely chose the exact moment when she stopped being right to harp on the subject and not let it go even when Leslie ordered her to.

      1. Sailor_Arashi

        In short, Roz is a teenager.

    5. Pinja

      No, this is just Dotty being a control freak

  16. JessWitt

    So Dorothy and Walky have caught on that Ethan’s gay and Joyce is in a total bind involving him? Talk about open secrets.

    1. Norah

      I don’t think Ethan appears gay to casual acquaintances. I think Walky guessed based on a stereotype of how straight college men act with their girlfriends, and he just happened to guess right. Sarah guessed, but she possibly has good instincts about some people.

  17. The Thing

    Yes, I think a lot of people wish you’d been more hands-on with Joyce.

    Eh? Eh? Anyone?

    Okay, I’ll go back to my corner now.

    1. grantimusmaximus

      Hey, she’s already expressed her jealousy, asking if Joyce was cheating on her. IT’S CANON

      1. Deanatay

        sarcastic canon, but sure.

      2. Bagge

        Dorothy can’t allow herself to fall for Joyce because that would mean that Walky was right and she was wrong, and that can’t be.

        It would also lead to plenty of shenanigans and jealousy, and on a meta level, the “Joyce best friend has the hots for her” is already done so I doubt it.

  18. grantimusmaximus

    Dang, my grammar is so rusty, parsing Walky’s last line would be a nightmare.

    1. Totz the Plaid

      He’s basically saying that it was obvious because Ethan’s hands never touch Joyce.

    2. SDGlyph

      I’ve been out of the linguistics game for a while, but I bet this kind of syntax has been giving NL and MT programmers kittens since, oh, Buffy at least. The schadenfreude is delicious.

      1. oldFart

        I’ve been out of the linguistics game so long, computational linguistics was not even offered at my university when I did my degree. We studied something called “Government and Binding”. I never understood it, but it sounds deliciously kinky.

        1. grantimusmaximus

          Mmm, yeah, gerrymander that district! I’m gonna filibuster till that pork barrel is full!

          … on second thought, the policy double-entendre game is really skeevy.

        2. Deanatay

          The kinkier the better!

          .. except politics. Shit’s too weird for me.

      2. saltchocolate

        I love that “her” could also be possessive in that sentence. Ethan’s hands on Joyce’s “never”! Hot, hot, hot!

  19. Kernanator

    *insert All You Need Is Love joke here*

    1. CenturyChild533

      brrrrrrra-da-da-dada…

      1. Deanatay

        All together now!

  20. Bagge

    Hey, Walky, what I said yesterday about you not joking away the issue when Dorothy talks about emotions is still a good idea, dofus (although you deserve credit for not making a lesbian-joke). That said, well spotted and thanks for reminding us that you are neither stupid nor clueless.

    Dorothy – wonderful sentiment (even if part of it sounds scarily close to a breakup), and I wouldn’t have been surprised to hear Joyce say the same thing about love. You might also do well to remember that the fact that you love Joyce and is her friend doesn’t mean it’s your responsibility to educate her.

    1. Doctor_Lantern

      I was thinking the same thing in that it did sound a little close to a break up. I don’t think that’s what is happening. I think this is more closely Dorothy beginning to rationalize a way to be able to leave Walky when the time comes.

      1. Bagge

        I think you are right. She is balances her earlier wish to keep the relationship casual and her deeper feelings at the same time, and lay the ground for rationalizing a breakup. It’s a pre-breakup.

      2. Gally

        Is it gentler for Dorothy to rationalize it aloud to herself and to Walky? I guess it forewarns him that a breakup could happen, too, and could help cushion the blow if it does eventually come, so maybe so. Still seems like she’s playing takesy-backsies with her first “I love you” by hair-splitting her way out of it, though.

        1. Bagge

          She does, but it’s not directed at Walky – see yesterday’s comment about she lying to herself about certain things. I think that’s why Walky is getting a bit snarky now, she’s flailing back and forth in the conversation and he starts to feel like a spectator.

    2. Beckett

      Walky’s like a lot of dudes his age really (and also a lot of dudes way older than his age). When it comes to other people’s relationship stuff his observations are spot on, but his own relationship stuff is a total blind spot that sends him into full derp mode. We’ve all been there (some of us are still there).

      1. WeezerLuvr3030

        That seems backwards to me. If I recall correctly, they’ve only known each other several weeks, not even two months. Walky is the realistic one and Joyce is high on post-orgasmic 18 year old hormones so she is talking blithering nonsense.

        1. neeks

          Uh, I hope you mean Dorothy.

        2. WeezerLuvr3030

          Dorothy, oy vey.

      2. Incomitatus

        I’ve been able to scan a room for five minutes and quite accurately tell you who is sleeping with whom, who ‘secretly’ hates whom, etc etc… to the point that good friends of mine have taken me along to events to give them the scoop.

        But can I figure out if a woman likes me before she tells me in exasperation? Nope. Never. It’s like a gift. Or the opposite of a gift. A fine?

        1. Incomitatus

          Incidentally, I’m 32 and I’ve negotiated with pirates and senators.

          Tell me, how old or experienced in reading people do I have to be before this changes? 😛

        2. Aolbain

          Just so we’re being clear, we are talking about softwear pirates and a member of the Wyoming (or some other sufficiently usless state) state senate, right?

        3. Deanatay

          Actually, both of those could be sports teams…

        4. Incomitatus

          Uh… sure, they probably stole software, too. The Somali ‘Coast Guard’ isn’t very discriminating… 😛

          I intended to go to Wyoming once, but I ended up detouring through Colorado instead.

        5. Solenoid

          So uh, not to pry, but if I had to guess, sounds like you’re in the Navy?

        6. Incomitatus

          No, I worked for an NGO. I wanted to join the Navy when I finished college, but that didn’t work out.

        7. Gamaran Sepudomyn

          Isn’t piracy like a 22 billion a year (probably more these days) business in Somali?

        8. Incomitatus

          Not sure of the numbers any more, but the economy of Somaliland – that’s the English-speaking north-western third of the country that is reasonably prosperous and stable and really insists it’s no longer part of the rest of Somalia – more or less depends on the revenue from black market pirated goods. Of the digital and physical kind.

        9. Opus the Poet

          Let me guess, the pirates were more likely to honor their agreements, right?

        10. Incomitatus

          In point of fact, they did, actually. But it was a one-time thing, I’d hate to generalize.

    3. The Thing

      It’s hard for people, especially in our modern, disconnected world, to be open about our feelings without alleviating the awkwardness of intimacy with jokes.

  21. dailybrad

    I guess Dorothy’s being pragmatic, they’ve only been dating, at most, a few weeks, right? So it’s smart of her to not expect that it’ll be forever right away, but it still has to feel like stepping on fingers to Walky, so I get where he’s coming from too.

    1. Nono

      It’s still a surprisingly mature attitude towards love. Dorothy has her blind spots (Yale being one of them) but she might be the most level-headed of the entire cast.

  22. John

    Dorothy said she loves Joyce and is talking about getting more hands-on with her, and Walky’s talking about Ethan’s sexual orientation? Who is this person and what did he do with the real Walky?

    1. Bagge

      He still remember what Big Sister said last time he made a lesbian joke (a few hours ago).

  23. TSB

    Sweet, some Dorothy emotion towards Joyce! I know Dorothy cares, but a lot of it comes off a bit “a person is sad in my proximity, I care because I am a good person” and not like “I care because I care about Joyce”, you know? So this is a cool development. Also: “if I’d been more hands-on”? It’s true she could have been more attentive given what she knew about what Joyce was going through, but that’s a poor attitude to take. It’s also worth noting, I think, that even though Dorothy acknowledged Walky’s problem he was hiding might not have been about her, she seems to think that it is. Maybe a tiny bit of a self-centered streak?

    Yay, Dorothy development!

    1. Sterling

      Oh it’s absolutely a poor attitude to take. Honestly, I love that. It’s a character flaw. Dorothy blames herself for not being useful enough when those she loves have problems, and I have the feeling this is neither the first nor last time we’ve seen that.

      It’s a very real, down to earth problem to have; one I personally have, actually. I like that, a lot really.

      1. Bagge

        I agree. Again, a similar attitude to Joyce.

        I think that was part of the problem with how she botched the breakup with Danny (now I’m talking about stuff that took place before the comic started so this is all speculation). Instead of focusing solely on her needs (“I want to break up with Danny, and I also want to be flexible enough to be able to transfer to Yale without problems”), she took it upon herself to coach him (“Danny needs to find a good college to get a computer degree, and he needs to have a plan for when I transfer”). When she discussed it with him in those terms he thought (“OK, so if she transfer I follow her and find a tech-job or something. Sweet, I have a plan”), which missed the bigger point that she actually wanted to break up with him.

    2. Tom T.

      “I know what’s best for my friends” is absolutely a self-centered steak, and not a tiny one.

      1. Norah

        Definitely, and it’s one she shares with Joyce, oddly enough.

        1. Rycan

          And Billie, pre-epiphany.

        2. Bagge

          The fun thing is that they have tried to “help” each other at different points. Joyce wanted to help Dorothy keep chaste, Billie wanted to give Joyce a better fashion sense, Dorothy want to help Dorothy Joyce become more open to diversity, Both Joyce and Dorothy joined Walky in the search for Billie and want to help her with her depression (and Joyce will help her brainstorm names of her seven children).

          Misguided and often unwelcome as many of these attempts are, I think all of them cherish the attitude that lies behind it. Even Billie grudgingly admits that she values Joyce’s friendship.

      2. Opus the Poet

        Tell me, are those steaks tender? 😉

  24. MiffedMab

    Really wondering how the conversation tween Dorothy and Joyce is going to go down.

    1. Kris

      Dorothy: Hey Joyce I heard you’re dating a gay guy.
      Joyce: I broke up with him.
      Dorothy: Oh ok…Who wants pizza!?

      1. Doctor_Lantern

        We can only hope its something this casually amusing.

        1. Smiling Cat

          Feet must end up in mouths.

        2. Arikel

          Feet in mouths are my literal fetish.

        3. xKiv

          Feetish.

        4. Bagge

          Given how smooth the breakup went I kinda think it will be, but I think it will lead to a larger discussion of how much stress Joyce is under. Hopefully they will manage to get Becky to sit still and listen long enough to realize that Joyce has plenty of problems of her own and needs her help rather than the other way around.

        5. Smiling Cat

          They need each other’s help.

        6. Bagge

          They sure do. Becky has already opened up to Joyce and Joyce is helping her, that is established. Now they have to go the other way. Joyce is too good at martyring herself, she has to admit that she is the one that needs help, and Becky has to take a break in her coming-out-rush long enough to take a good look at Joyce and see how much stress she is under.

  25. Idon'tcarenomore

    Walky is not stupid (despite the 26 grade, that was his wake up youre in college call), nor is he clueless. He just avoid responsibility when he can.

    Agree Dorothy has no reason for guilt, she was there for Joyce to talk to if Joyce wanted.

    Still find it an interesting thought that while Dorothy is so motivated to get into Yale: what if she and Walky apply, and she doesn’t get accepted and Walky does.

  26. Liz

    Dorothy…while I admire your sentiment here, I’m a little confused. You got angry at Walky for claiming he “loved you” as a life hack and said you believed love could be a powerful word. Yet here you are saying that love could be a lot of things and you love a lot of people. Back-pedaling? Or…what? I don’t know, I want to read this as Dorothy’s maturity, but it feels more like side-stepping issues than an honest emotional place.

    Also, cheers for perception, Walky.

    1. Sterling

      I don’t think that’s back pedaling. Love is a powerful thing, which can apply to a number of people and situations. The fact that it is a concept which can be applied to more than one thing does not lessen its power, nor the fact that, yeah, saying you love someone and not meaning it is a pretty dickish, pointless lie.

      1. Gally

        Maybe Dottie said “I love you” in the heat of the moment and now feels like she needs to free herself, since saying that does imply a certain level of commitment in a romantic relationship. But yeah, if she never was going to allow herself to let down her guard enough to mean it, I wish she’d had the foresight to not say it at all.

        Also, am I the only one who thinks negating “I love you” with a magnanimous platitude like “love can mean a lot of things…love evolves” is particularly insulting, even if that’s exactly what she believes?

        1. saltchocolate

          No. +1

    2. Stifyn Baker

      I’ve been in this conversation… or one sufficiently similar to it, anyway. If Dorothy is anything like that particular young lady, then the realisation of her admission of love for Walky is now really starting to aggravate her control-freakishness. This is ‘damage limitation’. Being truly, deeply in love with someone means surrendering quite a lot of control to that person. She’s trying to get some of her control back, and what she says about Joyce is more evidence of that too.

      1. Stifyn Baker

        As is the fact that she’s taken by surprise at her boyfriend knowing something she hasn’t told him.

      2. Tom T.

        Exactly. She didn’t get the reaction from Walky that she wanted when she said, “I love you,” so now she’s saying, “but love doesn’t always mean love love.”

    3. DuckDuckMoose

      This may be a stretch, but I actually read Dorothy’s current train of thought as having nothing to do with the way she feels about Walky right now. Right now, she definitely loves him in a very specific way that’s separate from the ways in which she loves anyone else. What she is trying to do is assure herself and him that, if she has to leave him behind in however many months or years, her feelings for him will continue to have meaning, even if it’s a much less intense and immediate meaning than they hold now. Hard to know if that will really be the case, but Dorothy seems like the kind of person who could make it so if she really wanted to.

  27. tim gueguen

    The amusing thing about Walky’s last comment is that “No touching!” is the kind of thing that Joyce would expect from a normal dating situation, given her background. After all she brought along a chaperone when she went out with Joe to prevent anything inappropriate. Right now even a chaste good night kiss would probably get Joyce worried she was crossing the line.

    1. vlademir1

      While that is true, there are layers to such things. It’d be odd, even from her background, for them to not even engage in hand holding for example.

      1. Deanatay

        I’m not the touchiest person I know – I get uncomfortable when my friends impulsively hug me – yet even I would want to put my arm around a girl I’m having a romantic relationship with. Small gestures of physical contact are a big part of an intimate relationship, and their total absence screams repression and concealment, to me.

  28. caesaria82

    I love these two. The last panel is amazing.

  29. StClair

    “No matter what happens, it’s possible I’ll always love you.”

    Wow. That’s deep commitment.

    1. Incomitatus

      Hmmm… yes… ‘possible’, such a romantic qualifier.

      1. Kim

        Thumbs up!

      2. A Scientist

        What kind of probability distribution are we looking at here? Is the diffuse tail all that falls in the “always love” area, or is it closer to the peak? Gaussian lineshape? Lorentzian? Oooh! Maybe it’s a multimodal distribution! That would be exciting, wouldn’t it?

    2. DarkoNeko

      She’s realistic about it.

      I mean, people going “ooh our love will stay forever and eveeer !!!1!!” ? yeah, pff

      1. StClair

        Among the immortal elves of Errant Story, it was well known that all love eventually ends. Which is why, for a time, it was very fashionable to take human lovers, who will have the decency to die a mere few decades later, while things are still “fresh”, allowing the elf to look back fondly on the unspoiled memory and idea of what they had.

        Of course, this had the minor side-effect of producing a lot of half-elves (the “errants” of the title), most of which were unfixably screwed up in various ways – an error which the elves later tried to correct via the expedient of genocide.

  30. Garrett

    AND Walky moves into the 2000s in the favorite character poll (probably been there a day or 2, I don’t pay that much attention)

  31. HeySo

    Hey, Willis, your poll might be bugged;
    I voted for Carla, Mike, and I forget the third one, probably Ruth.
    I just checked it (a few days later), and it’s telling me I voted for Becky, Joyce, and Carla- or at least, it has those bolded and italicized, which is what I assume that means.

    So not quite sure what that means, but Becky and Joyce aren’t exactly my top picks [not near snarky enough to be on my top list].
    More to the point, while I’m hardly the most reliable sort at doing things right, I always include Mike and Carla in my picks, so it’s really off that Mike isn’t listed.

    Maybe I misclicked- or maybe the data is mis-set. 🙂

    Alternatively, you’re rigging the poll in favor of Becky..
    :eyes you: But you wouldn’t do that.. right?

    1. Rycan

      Software behind the poll must’ve come from Florida.

      1. Garrett

        *triggered*

  32. hof1991

    Yep Walky. The lying has begun and you have no real expectation of exclusivity or longevity. She “loves” him but would drop him like a hot potato for more important things. Dorothy shares that with Joe, but she prefers a long term casual relationship to short term ones. Walky is a sidekick with benefits, so I see why Dorothy liked Danny, since he was well suited for the role. Nope, I don’t find that to be mature on her part and if she was a guy pulling this kind of bs, I would hope that the woman would cut her losses and move on. But at 18, I would have made the sexy times last as long as possible.

    1. Bagge

      Three weeks into a relationship I think that it’s at least as mature an attitude as “you are my true love” or “let’s pick out baby names”, especially when transfer might be in the cards.no-one knows how long they will last after so short time

      Dorothy is trying to avoid her mistake with Danny by communicating a lot, and overdoes it a bit. She also d debates her conflicting desires with Walky as a soundingboard.

  33. nothri

    Sure, sure…but I prefer the kind of love that occasionally involves sexins.

    1. Arikel

      “sexins” are overrated, it’s all about friendship and loyalty, one can do without the sex

      1. ninja_jesus

        I value sexins a lot but I can go without it because who the fuck cares about what I want out of a relationship amirite?

        😐

      2. nothri

        I’ll own that I want friendship and loyalty to be prerequisites for anyone I sleep with. But speaking as a guy who’s basically been single for longer than I’m gonna admit to I say its basically impossible for me to “overrate” the sexins. I suppose I just chalk it up to the simple fact that by the time we’re at that stage I’ll already be getting and giving all loyalty and friendship and all the other things that go into a relationship in great abundance.

  34. DuckDuckMoose

    I don’t think Dorothy is being abnormally or alarmingly control freakish. It is definitely unhealthy to think that she could somehow have engineered Joyce’s social development in a better direction by keeping a closer eye on her, especially given that Dorothy would probably burn out fast and hard if she tried to keep tabs on someone else and live her own very full life at the same time. (Could I be projecting that assumption because the same thing has happened to me repeatedly? Uh… no. Not in the slightest.) But a whole lot of people, maybe most of us, are prone to attempting such things, and I think an overdeveloped sense of responsibility for other people can be especially acute in kids who are trying to deal with adulthood for the first time.

    Also, it seems very likely that her wish to have a more active role in Joyce’s life is rooted partially in lingering guilt over leaving her by herself at a party three weeks ago, and maybe over her powerlessness to do all that much for her in the aftermath of the assault. Joyce’s response, the one time Dorothy brought it up the day after, was to smile brightly and brush it off, and she might try to respond the same way even now. Someone as perceptive as Dorothy eventually has to see the bullshit in Joyce’s claims that she’s fine, but trying to help someone cope with trauma is an incredibly sensitive thing that Dorothy has presumably never dealt with before. So she hasn’t really known what to do about it besides just be there for Joyce as much as possible in other, smaller crises. So what she’s doing now could be largely informed by her “failure” to help Joyce with her most serious problems.

    Times like these, I wish Dorothy knew Billie a little better. Billie can be quite good at diagnosing other people’s issues, and this situation might need a little bit of Dorothy’s generalized sensitivity and a little bit of alpha b***h. (Sorry to subvert the filter, but I’m not gonna bongo up Billie’s own description of herself.)

    Also also, it’s fairly comforting to see Dorothy talk about Joyce’s awful path when Joyce has already started pulling herself off that path. I think this is one set of problems that the characters might actually handle sanely, which means that we’re due to have a different set of people screw something up hardcore.

    1. neeks

      Those are some interesting insights and I thank you for making this comment.

      1. Bagge

        Hear, hear!

        I also find it interesting that the one thing Joyce asked Dorothy to do to help her was the one thing Dorothy couldn’t do – go to church with her.

        Sure, she joined her but that led to a row with Mary and tip-toeing around invisible-sky-God-topics of conversation and general awkwardness. Dorothy was not able to join Joyce in the church experience she wanted.

        1. DuckDuckMoose

          Yeah, that worked out poorly and seemed to just add to Joyce’s internal conflicts. Fortunately, I suspect that the new gay-positive Joyce is going to want to find herself a more inclusive congregation (surely Bloomington has a few) to help her reconcile her faith with her recently acquired convictions. In that context, with Mary nowhere in sight, I could see Dorothy giving church another try and perhaps feeling less uncomfortable. In fact… what is the in-universe day of the week, Friday? We might actually see that happen in the storyline after next.

        2. DuckDuckMoose

          Now that I’m looking at older strips through a lens of Dorothy not quite being able to be there for Joyce, this one, which I originally thought was funny and sweet, now seems a little sad. If part of what’s going on is that Joyce needs the reassurance of girl company when Dorothy needs to be elsewhere… well, as Joyce said, dangit.

      2. DuckDuckMoose

        You’re welcome, neeks. Thanks for saying.

    2. Solenoid

      Next up on People Screwing Something Up Hardcore of Age… Amber’s been a bit happy lately.

      1. DuckDuckMoose

        Yeah, my best best is that either Amber gets seriously triggered again or Mary tells the IU housing authority about Ruth and Billie. Maybe both. ‘Cause that’s where the drama’s at right now.

        1. DuckDuckMoose

          Wait, best best? Best bet.

  35. Charles Fee

    “I think I love Joyce, too”
    Fund it
    “If I’d been more hands on..”
    FUND IT.

  36. Jerden

    I don’t think there was much that Dorothy could have done for Joyce. You can’t force people to change their minds.

  37. B

    You know, conveniently-placed-elbow has hidden many a nipple over the years. . .

  38. Vangeln

    A lot of people hate that, Dorothy.

  39. Wisharts

    D’aww, I love Dorothy’s hair all messy.

  40. Atlantic Salmon

    In the last panel, Dorothy’s posture reminds me of Scandinavia And The World characters.

  41. Thad

    I’m going to paraphrase a friend of mine. Sure, we all use that word for friends, but it means something different when you say it to someone you’ve been going out with (and sleeping with) for a few weeks. You can’t use it the same way without regard for context.

  42. Kaoy

    Willis, kudos on somehow not taking the easy punchline after the rampant accidental innuendo in panel 4.

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