237

Manic
Posted on January 2, 2014 by David M Willis

237 thoughts on “Manic”

  1. Jen Aside

    wow uh Joyce… calm down

    1. Tunaro

      She’s going critical!

      1. Parnifia the Bastard

        MINI-CRITS!

    2. Plasma Mongoose

      This would have never happened if she dated Dotty instead.

      1. Yotomoe

        Or Sal’s bike.

        1. Sageress

          Or her magnificent hair

        2. Opus the Poet

          Your avatar is strangely suited to that comment.

    3. GoldStarz

      Sorry Joyce, did you say crazy *ex*-girlfriend?

      1. That Damn Rat

        forms a nice match set with his crazy current girlfriend

        1. saltchocolate

          One day, Joyce, YOU’LL be the crazy ex-girlfriend, and you’ll look back on all of this and laugh.

        2. Sageress

          Maniacally laugh

        3. Kernanator

          And then stab everything.

        4. Schadetj

          Best gravatar.

        5. UnspeakableAnger

          But with WHOSE femurs?

        6. StClair

          and laugh and laugh and laugh hooo boy

  2. Karkat-san

    At first I thought Sarah was totally coppin’ Joyce’s boob.

    1. Yotomoe

      W-…where?

      1. GoldStarz

        I think he means the final panel

      2. Karkat-san

        Oh, haha… Last panel. They way Joyce’s arms were up and the face she was making sorta suggested something at first glance before I fully read through the whole thing.

        … nevermind that it was Joyce’s hand, it would make no sense, and it was the wrong skintone. But the heart wants what it wants…

    2. maarvarq

      Attractive a thought as that is, which panel gave you that idea?

  3. Geminia999

    And Joyce just had a stroke, great :/

  4. Kladeos

    Poor Sarah. Always looking our for Joyce, never vice versa.

    1. timemonkey

      Joyce said she’d do this before the whole Ethan drama bomb exploded.

      1. John

        Hell, she was trying to do it even before she knew Sarah was familiar with Jacob.

        1. Kladeos

          And look how it all worked out!

  5. JebJeb

    Hey look at it from a certain perspective Joyce! Your gay boyfriend says he loves a woman more than anyone else. That’s progress!

    1. Yotomoe

      It’s just not you! But he likes you enough to date you. Just doesn’t love you enough to not want to dissapoint you!

      1. JebJeb

        And really that’s all you really need in a marriage!

      2. Charles RB

        YEahhhh, Ethan _has_ kneecapped the relationship doing that, hasn’t he?

        1. Jenny Creed

          When I think of Ethan and Joyce’s relationship, I’m picturing Spore, in the second stage of the game where you get legs and stuff, only they decided to skip the legs and arms and eyes and just made a shapeless blob that wiggles around in a tiny colorless world, hoping to maybe bump into something it can eat before it starves to death.

          So, like, what kneecap.

        2. ninja_jesus

          Hold my breath as I wish for death~ Oh please, God, wake meeee!

  6. AHR

    Heh, yeah, we never saw Joyce’s reaction to this…

    1. Undrave

      I completely forgot about it myself. Then I read this and I’m like “Oh yeah…that happened too!”. MEANWHILE Blaine is teaching Danny how to devour children and throw force lightning.

      1. Karkat-san

        Or maybe throwing children and devouring lightning. Either is really possible.

        1. saltchocolate

          Well, he doesn’t need to teach Danny how to fuck up Amber’s life — Danny’s got that part down already.

        2. ShaggyDonahugh

          Hey now, Amber’s life was already:
          A) fucked up in the first place and
          B) She fucked it more by forcing him into an uncomfortable position while he was already “dating someone else (amazigirl). In this situation, Danny is no more than a very poorly placed chess piece in her broken brain.

        3. begbert2

          Yeah, it’s more that Amber is actively using Danny to fuck her own life up. It’s sort of like he’s the bull she brought into her china shop – though suffice to say, he’s very good at spinning around and unknowingly and unintentionally smashing everything in sight.

        4. Historyman68

          Eat lightning and crap thunder!

        5. brionl

          Shit fire and save matches.

        6. xKiv

          Devour lightning and throw up children.

      2. Pat

        I thought that said “chicken” and I did not understand.

    2. D

      I actually had to reread the last month to figure out what she was talking about. >_>;;

  7. Doctor_Who

    “Don’t worry, you’ll be totally sexy! Now where do you keep your sweater-vests?”

    1. saltchocolate

      Love this!

    2. Seerow

      I was wondering if anyone was going to comment on what Joyce thought would constitute a “hot outfit”

      1. Opus the Poet

        Something heavily insulated, obviously.

  8. shadowcell

    oh, so she’s taking it quite well after all

    so did Riley ever get her Cocoa Puffs? i feel like we’re lacking closure on that important point

    1. David Herbert

      I think she had them in the strip Dina introduced her to Amber.

    2. captainswift

      In my fanon, Riley always has plentiful Cocoa Puffs. And Cap’n Crunch, if she so desires.

      1. Doctor_Who

        With Riley DeSanto on the case, Soggies will never rule!

        1. Jay Eff

          Correction: “Soggies may never rule”

        2. GoldStarz

          I now demand that when Dumbing of Age ends whenever, the sequel be this universe’s equivalent of “It’s Walky” about an older Riley fighting the Soggies.

        3. MM

          Awesome though that would be, it still probably couldn’t live up to Breakfast of the Gods.

        4. John

          It’d be called “Nomming of Age”. It’d just be four identical panels each day of Riley eating cereal with clear “-crunchcrunchcrunch-” sound effects. Then there’d be a plot twist where she got up and walked off-panel to get more cereal.

          Later, LAWsome crossover!

        5. GoldStarz

          The final comic would be of Cap’n Crunch joining her with a bowl of congratulatory cereal for killing all of the soggies by eating delicious Cap’n Crunch, only, PLOT TWIST, she was eating Lucky Charms the whole time, so Soggies may still rule. Then the next sequels “Riley and Cereal!” and “Unboxed!” follow up on very loose plot threads still hanging from her cereal eating adventures.

        6. Narf

          Oh my god I love this so much.

          Nomming of Age, with delicious cereal every day forever. 😀

      2. Yotomoe

        I’m sure in the alternate universe she is allowed to marry a Cereal Tycoon.

        1. Bill

          Which of the series would have her facing a cereal killer?
          (slinks off in shame after that abominable pun)

        2. Rex Hondo

          Your joke is bad and you should feel bad!

  9. Thanks, I'll Have Another!

    Fallout intensifies

    1. Sageress

      That’s some Fallout, Boy.

  10. timemonkey

    Yes, Joyce, Ethan loves Amber more than you. Ethan loves penis more than you. You’re merely a means to regain control. try dating Danny instead, it’d be funny.

    1. Mr K

      Or Dorothy. We all know you want her.

      1. Doctor_Who

        Or Sal. We all know you want her as well. Because you have a pulse.

        1. Mr K

          Everybody wants Sal. Even herself.

        2. timemonkey

          Why not all of the above? XD

    2. Yotomoe

      You are tool in the saddest way, Joyce.

      1. Sageress

        Like, pliers sad.

    3. insomniac

      try dating Danny instead, it’d be funny.

      Ohhhh, no. Not that again!

      1. timemonkey

        She’s never dated Danny before. They’d be a swirling vortex of ever expanding bad decisions and obliviousness. It will be beautiful.

        1. saltchocolate

          It happens in the Walkyverse. Your prediction is fairly accurate, too!

        2. GoldStarz

          That wasn’t dating, that was stalking.

    4. The Candyman

      Hell, she might even be better off with Mike.

      1. Keroshino

        A Joyce and Mike pairing?
        …Perish the thought!!!!

  11. David Herbert

    Maybe Joyce should go out with Jacob instead.

    1. Graq

      That… might actually make some kind of sense

      1. nekobawt

        except for the part where jacob is a heterosexual male who–and this may not become a relevant plotpoint in THIS universe–in another universe was a sex addict. or someone with an addictive personality which focused on sex. one of those.

        what i’m getting at is jacob probably likes sex, which is totally not what joyce is emotionally equipped to handle in a guy at this point.

        1. Josh

          I’m sure Jacob could… change her mind. 😉

        2. Graq

          Actually knowing about Shortpacked! Jacob’s sex addiction made me think this would make sense, at least in a way. Both Joyce and Ethan are in this relationship to avoid having to deal with sexual urges (“mutual aversion to fucking”, if you will), but their end goals or at least ideal end goals aren’t served by it. Joyce’s ideal end game is marriage, and for Ethan that would mean a lifetime of pretending to be something he’s not for the sake of others, mainly his parents. And Joyce would be in a marriage with a man who could never give a full romantic and sexual relationship. If Ethan and Joyce were in some kind of agreement whereby Joyce just hangs out with him as beard, that would be one thing, but that’s not what this situation is exactly. Joyce has an expectation that with enough patience and prayer Ethan will one day be her perfect Christian husband instead of a gay jewish man.

          Now consider a recovering sex addict Jacob and this Joyce. Joyce isn’t comfortable escalating to anything sexual yet. If Jacob entered into the relationship respecting that, then it would actually give Jacob the chance to engage with someone emotionally for a long time without the expectation of sex. The difference between this and the Ethan scenario is that eventually they could have mutually compatible end goals. Once Jacob has worked on his relationship to sex enough that he can engage it in a healthy manner, he would have an strong, established relationship to have it in a with a person who would know where he’s coming from if he needs to stop. Joyce would have a romantic relationship with someone of a compatible orientation when she herself felt ready to move on to sexual contact.

          Obviously, this all hypothetical and would riddled with it’s own problems, but it’s what I thought of at the idea of Joyce/Jacob.

        3. Graq

          Did… did I just make the longest post in the comments section with a meandering bunch of speculation only tangentially related to today’s comic? I, I think I may need to lie down.

        4. ninja_jesus

          Welcome to the club! Food and drinks are available. 🙂

  12. Plasma Mongoose

    I misread the 1st panel as “Sarah, I’m gonna find you a hotdog suit”

    1. Jay Eff

      “Then Jacob will finally notice your buns!!”

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        +1 LIKE

      2. Sageress

        “Afterwards I’ll wear it. Ethan loves wieners, after all!”

      3. Narf

        Ahahaha!! This comment wins.

    2. AJBulldis

      That’s something you save for the wedding night.

    3. Matt

      Well, that does get attention from boys… and girls… and passing animals. A walking hot dog is hard to ignore.

    4. Yotomoe

      That’s how I start every conversation with my friends.

      1. Doctor_Who

        Good thing all your friends are named Sarah.

  13. newllend

    I almost thought that two, I was about to say.

  14. Rex Hondo

    So, she heard that, did she?

    1. Matt

      It would be pretty hard to have missed, you know, since Ethan was talking to Amber and Amber only being held back from Joyce by Sarah.

  15. Kernanator

    Sooooulcrush~

    1. Aizat

      MIND CRUSH!

      1. Rando

        Candy Crush!

        1. ninja_jesus

          The Crushinator!

  16. JessWitt

    Ah Joyce, always worrying about the wrong flippin’ thing.

    1. Yotomoe

      I dunno. If that was something MY boyfriend just said in front of me I’d be pretty mad too. Of course…I’d be in the same boat as him because I’m ALSO not gay.

      1. AJBulldis

        Have you and your boyfriend thought about seeing other people?

        1. Sageress

          I see other people all the time. There’s one. There’s another. I see like three across the room. What’s your point?

        2. ninja_jesus

          Are any of them dead?

        3. Sageress

          they will be

        4. ninja_jesus

          Not very helpful; we all will be. 😛

        5. anonymous

          Very soon if Sageress has anything to do with it.

      2. JessWitt

        Point taken, Yotomoe. It’s just that Joyce’s concern is overlooking that she’s dating a closeted gay guy. Plus does she even recall what Amber said about defending him when he came out? She’s not just an ex-girlfriend, Joyce.

        Then again Joyce is overly love-crazy. Marriage priorities and all that.

        1. Frogger

          Joyce only latched onto the whole love comment. NOTHING ELSE MATTERS. I mean, it’s not like Ethan flirted with another man at all. …*shifty look*

        2. Jelli

          Have Ethan ever told Joyce that he came out? From Joyce’s perspective, Amber is the complete crazy who flipped a table, tried to physically assault her and then yelled about some stuff Joyce knew nothing about?

          Yeah I put the vast majority of the blame for Joyce and Ethan’s relationship on Ethan. Way to screw up two girls, dude. What to go for a third?

        3. ninja_jesus

          OH NO NOT DINA!

        4. Frogger

          I share that sentiment on the relationship blaming. I don’t think anyone should say that the blame should be equal. Joyce’s reasoning is understandable. Annoying, but understandable. Ethan’s reasoning is so infuriating.

          I get that people are scared. But he was already out, he had a support system from Amber and he crapped on it at (pretty much) the first opportunity. I still find it pretty crappy that he never stood up to his mother regarding Amber.

          This relationship will never work out. I’m willing to bet that Joyce will be the one hurting more, depending on the situation and what happens of course.

  17. Wonder Wig

    God creates man. Man creates Monkey Master. Dina loves dinosaurs. Dinosaurs eat God.

    1. AJBulldis

      Dinosaurs eat Mary. Mary destroys dinosaurs.

      1. anonymous

        Is the intensity of her perpetual rage enough to overcome the stomach acids of a dinosaur? I think it would depend on which dinosaur.

    2. Aizat

      Dinosaurs become smarter, creates an underground empire and create Mechasaurus to rule Man.

      1. Kiggy

        Man builds Getter Robo to defeat smart dinosaurs.

        1. Ikaru

          Either way, women inherit the earth.

  18. PureFedora

    Someone hug poor Joyce. Someone hug her now.

    1. MM

      Not sure that’s safe at the moment. We should probably plop her in front of the TV and turn on cartoons instead.

    2. TaintedSpud

      Nah, I’d rather watch her go into meltdown.

      1. kelticat

        Munch, Munch, Munch. Want some popcorn?

  19. Shade

    Of course he does, even if he wasn’t gay, they’ve grown up together and you’ve only been dating for like less than a week.

    1. newllend

      Yet she already talking about marriage. How does somebody think like that?

      1. Matt

        Haven’t you ever experienced *~true love~* ? Basically what I’m saying is Joyce is like a 13 year old girl who thinks her first boyfriend is the most perfect boyfriend ever and they’ll be happy foreverrrr.

        1. gangler

          Well, second boyfriend. She was talking about kids with Joe before this though, so there’s that.

          Really I think she’s just been very hardwired into thinking of dating as the pursuit of a Happily Ever After, and thinking of Married with Children as that happily ever after. I personally bet that if you asked her why somebody might date in a scenario where marriage was not being considered, she would only be able to imagine sinful motivations.

        2. nekobawt

          at first i thought you were referring to Married… with Children, which i grew up watching, but never confused with the ideal marital state. although al and peggy, for all the bickering, were happy together as a couple, i guess.

        3. kelticat

          Like Anna in “Frozen”

      2. timemonkey

        Joyce is ALWAYS thinking marriage. it’s the whole reason she’s here and the motivation behind every interaction with a new guy.

    2. Doctor_Who

      152 hours! That’s practically married!

      1. Kirby

        Common law married is only 61,360.7 hours! So, close enough, right?

      2. Plasma Mongoose

        But it’s still shorter than Carmen Electra/Dennis Rodman’s marriage.

        1. Jon P

          But longer than Britney Spears and Kevin whats-his-face.

        2. Mr K

          The only thing he was worse at then relationships was rapping.

        3. Historyman68

          Britney and K-Fed lasted longer than that. Now Britney and Jason Alexander, that was a five-minute marriage.

          I’m still eternally sad that it wasn’t Seinfeld’s Jason Alexander she married.

        4. nekobawt

          well that jason alexander was certainly WAY more talented than kevin federwurst or whatever his name was.

    3. gangler

      Joyce has very specific ideas about how love and romance work that aren’t really grounded in anything real.

      If Amber was an ex-wife Joyce would have trouble processing the notion that Ethan and Amber aren’t still soulmates forever. Came up when she found out about Joe’s divorced parents.

      “They stopped dating so they must not love eachother” actually seems like a much easier and more intuitive mistake to make as she initially enters the dating scene. Pretty sure that one’s been made by people in much better situations than her.

      Aside from that, seems like the sort of thing that might be pretty hard to hear even when you understand why it is.

      1. Shade

        I get the unreasonable expectations, but surely Joyce also recognises that there’s more forms of love than just romantic.

        1. gangler

          Well sure. She’s probably aware of familial love and love between friends, but she seems pretty committed to the notion that romantic love is the one you direct towards your significant other. I can see why “I love you more than anyone” directed towards an ex-girlfriend might not immediately sound like “You’re my bestest friend in the whole wide world” to Joyce’s ears.

          Really I don’t think that’s what most people would hear in that scenario. The whole statement reads quite intuitively as an exchange between a madly in love couple who have simply come against irreconcilable differences. It’s pretty close to the case, too. Ethan really would’ve married Amber if he thought there was same way he could circumvent the bedroom issues. Amber’s pretty much his nonsexual soulmate. Even if romance isn’t quite the right word for it that’s something that would intimidate a lot of people.

  20. Idon'tcarenomore

    So she hasn’t changed at all, just hiding it.

  21. Chupabarbara

    I’m glad to realize they’ve been dating less than a week.

    I feel like Joyce and my 14 year old Xanga entries would have common ground.

    1. gangler

      I’m pretty sure 152 hours is the number of hours they’ve actually spent dating, rather than the number of hours that have passed since they started dating.

      1. Kirby

        I think it’s probably the number of hours since they’ve been dating. Joyce strikes me as an ‘I’ve had a boyfriend for x hours now’ type…

        1. Kladeos

          She’s literally said something along the lines of “my boyfriend for 48 hours.”

        2. Kas

          Yeah, something along those lines, back when they were at Galasso’s with Dorothy and Walky. I think Willis said in the alt-text that she started counting from when they held hands in church.

      2. Kladeos

        No, they’ve only been dating a few days at this point.

        152 hours of actual dates is… A lot of dates.

        1. gangler

          Ah, good point then. Nevermind.

        2. Squib

          Or one really awesome date…

        3. Josh

          152 hours is a little over 6 days, I doubt it’s that many dates.

        4. xKiv

          I suspect that most people don’t spend more than 8 hours on a single date (because they have other obligations, and also have to sleep some time), so at least 19 dates.

        5. Kladeos

          152 hours in actual dates, not time elapsed since they first started dating, is either many many dates or more than a few overnighters.

      3. Chupabarbara

        I’m not sure, considering she has the dating maturity of a 14 year old I would think she would count it as “hours I can say I’ve had a boyfriend” rather than “time spent with Ethan.”

        On that note, even if you averaged 6 hours of them spending time together whenever they see each other (which is pretty generous), math doesn’t add up.

        1. Sandman

          25 1/3 days, so slightly under a month for 6 hours each day. It is possible, but only if there has been a lot of time ‘off screen.’

        2. JJ

          No it’s not. It’s been stated they’re on their third weekend, and you still have to count for the days before she first went to church with Ethan.

          On her first weekend she went to church with Dorothy, Mary and Sierra. On the second she took Ethan there. So the “less than 1 week” count holds up.

  22. that_guy_from_that_place

    Did anyone else think this would end with a “Joyce doesn’t know how to interact with black people” gag, and not a “Joyce doesn’t know how to deal with adult relationships” punchline?

    1. Taara

      I thought it was gonna end in a “how do you expect to land a man if you have no denim jumpers” punchline.

    2. Historyman68

      Maybe she just doesn’t know how to deal w black people and adult relationships at the same time. She can do either one if it’s one-at-a-time.

  23. newllend

    You know who would probably bring order to all this, or make it more entertaining? Mike.

  24. Idon'tcarenomore

    Nice paraphrase on Jurassic Park Wonder Wig

    1. Jason

      Oh dear, have you still not found the Reply links? They’re right under the commenter’s names next to the date and time stamps. See ’em???

  25. Mr K

    Given all the drama that’s been happening lately, I wonder what the next surprise will be. Maybe Joe and Roz come out as Asexuals?

    1. Rex Hondo

      Jacob arranges an intervention for Joe’s sex addiction.

      1. Mr K

        Dina confesses her love for Amber.

        1. Rex Hondo

          …As they ramp off of an uncompleted elevated highway during the climactic car chase?

        2. Keroshino

          Worth it!

  26. Nothri

    Sad part is this is a nice change of place from the stealth racism storyline.

    1. chris73

      Or Blaine…

      1. timemonkey

        Or Family Weekend in general…

        1. Keroshino

          Or the universe hating Amber!

  27. Plasma Mongoose

    She’s a maniac, maniac on the floor
    And she’s dancing like she’s never danced before
    She’s a maniac, maniac on the floor
    And she’s dancing like she’s never danced before

    1. Keroshino

      Great jorb!

  28. Theozilla

    Huh, forgot that Ethan said that within earshot of Joyce. I wonder if this will begin to make her realize that she won’t be able to change Ethan’s sexuality, when Amber’s is evidence of Ethan being unable to do so for someone he actually knew and loved (non-sexually) for a long time.

    1. saltchocolate

      Within earshot = right in front of, in a conversation that included her

  29. YakkoRex

    Yes, Sarah, well you would be wrong about that.

  30. Rani

    WE’VE GOT A DRAMA CORE BREACH

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      MANUALLY EJECT!

      1. Aizat

        FIRMLY GRASP IT!

        1. saltchocolate

          WE NEED TO PATCH THIS ASAP! (Where’s McGuyver?)

        2. Ikaru

          I have some bubblegum and paper clips, but that only builds a bomb…

    2. Rex Hondo

      REVERSE THE POLARITY OF THE POSITRON FLOW!

      1. ninja_jesus

        But if you reverse the polarity of a positron, then it’ll definitely become A NEGATRON!

  31. Aizat

    If Joyce is Goldblumming, she didn’t do the ummms and uhhhs.

    1. Matt

      “Life Love finds a way”

    2. Yotomoe

      You see uhhhh uhhh…ethan uhhh is…uhhh…a manwhore…yes. I have uhhhh studied them haaaah hmm..

      1. Aizat

        And you know what happens next? -in a whispering tone- Checkmate!

  32. Regalli

    … Aaaaaand THERE’S the relationship-obsessed, slightly psychotic Roomies!Joyce we all know and fear!

    1. MM

      To this Joyce’s credit, she is trying to channel her impulses into helping someone else, instead of plotting ways to destroy Amber or keep Ethan away from everyone else he might be interested in forever.

  33. someguywithakatana

    I’m gonna be honest. For a second there, I forgot about what just happened with Ethan and Amber and thought that Joyce was somehow remembering her college experience in another universe.

    This is a recurring theme with Joyce…

  34. Aizat

    Here’s how you Goldblum: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bx5dJPy8XUg

  35. newllend

    Ok ok joyce, here what you do: go out, buy the most sexy night gown you can find, the go and wait in his room till he gets back, the try to sadduce him. Its full proof how he possibly resist?

    (Enjoying Joyce’s suffering )

    1. Shanunu

      It’s funny because it’s a typo that could instead be looked at as a portmanteau of “sad” and “seduce”!

      1. Frogger

        I hereby vote that if Joyce ever tries to seduce someone and it’s a very sad attempt at it, we should call it a “sadduce!”

        1. Jack Finch

          It would be funnier than her attempts to swear.

        2. xKiv

          But wouldn’t that just be Joycing it?

    2. Heavensrun

      I’d just kinda like to see, at this stage in her development, what Joyce would consider “the most sexy nightgown you can find”.

      (I bet it would totally show ankle)

      1. kelticat

        And wrists, and possibly her neck.

  36. Mr K

    I wonder what Sal and Amber are doing? Hopefully each other.

    1. nekobawt

      sal’s joyriding with marcy and amber’s probably on a path that will lead her to direct eyesight of danny conversing with her OTHER nemesis.

      i can’t wait for the danny/amber conversation that includes him commenting on how blaine seemed like an alright guy to him.

      1. Karkat-san

        This is really off-subject, but holy shit, is that a Marmalade Boy gravatar?

        1. nekobawt

          i honestly don’t remember. i made it umptymillion internet years ago (so maybe 14 actual years) when i was a regular patron of a shoujo-centric fanscan site. it might be marmalade boy, but it could just as easily be from a manga with a similar art style.

  37. Shanunu

    It’s just an excuse for Joyce to dig through Sarah’s closet and nose into Sarah’s life.

    1. Mr K

      She’s a total stalker.

      1. Shanunu

        I think knowing off hand the number of hours she’s been dating her gay boyfriend is very much evidence to this point.

        1. What was the question again?

          She’s stalking herself!

  38. Badeyes

    I heard this tremendous cracking sound, thought we were having an earthquake, but nope it was just Joyce.

  39. Ancestral Hamster

    Guess it doesn’t matter what universe it is: there is core of crazy at the center of Joyce’s being. The difference is how it manifests.

  40. RyanM

    Hilariously, the moment I scrolled over the alt text, Abed on community at the same exact time said “Jeff, you’re Goldblumming”

  41. Kyle

    This only hurts Joyce if she expects reciprocation, which suggests that 152 hours has been enough time for her to fall in love with Ethan further than she’s loved any man before. As sad as this is, it makes sense; this is the girl who has been trained from childhood to latch on to a godly groom and use him to give god a quiver full of little blonde arrows.

    It didn’t have to be Ethan. Joe didn’t work out because he’s Joe: honest, straightforward sexuality is far more than Joyce can bear. Still, that leaves so many possibilities. There are plenty of dudes subtle and manipulative enough to take advantage of Joyce for more than simply a gay-denying sham relationship.

    What I’m getting at is that she could have easily gotten this attached to -Mike-. It would have fallen into place perfectly, and he would have destroyed her life in any number of ways just for the hell of it, and the alcohol thing, and, and, and…

    Thank you Willis. This is far from the darkest timeline.

    1. NoHeart

      On behalf of Joyce i would like to thank God for this as well…

    2. Karkat-san

      This is probably the best thing for Joyce and Ethan. Maybe Joyce will realize she shouldn’t latch onto people in love (since you don’t know who they are right away), and maybe Ethan will realize if he DOES want to be intimate on a level we’re pretty sure he does, he can’t really be happy trying to be “normal.”

      They’re both trying to shrug off what their parents did to them, and they probably are the best people for each other right now… in a strange way.

      1. taekwondogirl

        They’d be the best people for each other in that regard if they could open up and admit how much their parents did to control them. From my experience, it really helps to have someone with similar parental manipulation to talk to about it. That’s not enough to build a relationship, but a good friendship sure. They’d still need to talk about it, too.

  42. Lilith

    That’s almost a week, isn’t it?

    1. Rex Hondo

      Six days and eight hours.

  43. Tenn

    Before reading the last panel, just glancing at Joyce’s face made me think she found some hotter outfits than she expected… or Sarah’s “toys”.

    1. taekwondogirl

      I don’t think Joyce would know what those toys were if she came across them visually.

      1. Historyman68

        Rub it on my tummy!

      2. Heavensrun

        “It’s a back massager! Mom had one of these! Hey, would you use it on me?”

      3. Rex Hondo

        Hehe… You said “came.”

      4. kelticat

        Curlers….in the walkyverse

  44. CianM1301

    Oh no, the madness got to Joyce!

  45. Ikaru

    Ok wow….Joyce is still Joyce alright. Silly Sarah, thinking otherwise.

  46. Jack Finch

    Crazy Joyce is BACK!

  47. Pat Myers

    Too be fair, Joyce, Ethan loves Amber like a sister.

    His love for you is more like that of a security blanket.

    1. Arkantos

      What love? He’s never said anything close to that.

      1. Historyman68

        He didn’t have to. He said it with his EYES.

      2. Darth Cariss

        He did kinda make out with her a couple times.

  48. quietlythundering

    Somebody prepare the panic room!

    1. Cragalanch

      Done!

  49. Historyman68

    I’m glad Sarah didn’t get her hopes up too much. Doesn’t seem to buy it for a minute.

  50. nalem

    Aww, be easy on Amber, Joyce. She’s going through a really hard… life.

    No, really. Her life is pretty screwed.

  51. XMinusOne

    For some reason, I’m imagining Joyce singing ‘This Nearly Was Mine’ and Ethan singing ‘ I Wish I Was An Oscar Meyer Wiener’. Hee,hee,hee.

  52. Black

    At the rate that Joyce is discovering real happenings in the real world, and being messed with by Ethan, I can only see one of a few scenarios finally come to fruition.

    First, Joyce just snaps and hides in the nearest church, having them call her family to bring her back to the fantasy world she lived in.

    Second, perhaps going crazy street pastor and telling everyone how they’re scum in the eyes of god, and generally trying to convert everyone to her brand of extremism.

    Third, perhaps a murder/suicide of Ethan or someone else close to her at the college.

    No matter how it goes I don’t think she’s going to come out of this college experience any saner than before, in fact she’ll be even more crazy when the real world doesn’t work like the few ideas she’s been given by her whole town.

    1. Hieronymous Thrax

      You really don’t seem to “get” Joyce.

      Joyce has shown a willingness to learn and grow past her ignorance of the world outside the narrow views she learned during her long years of homeschooling. Her acceptance and defense of Dorothy’s beliefs – while still maintaining her own – shows that while she holds strong beliefs, she possesses open toleration and respect for those who don’t agree with her.

      There have been dumb things she’s done (read the comic title) either out of naivete or what others might see as a misguided belief, but Joyce has already proven to persevere in much fiercer tragedy than this (the Ryan date-rape attempt). True, she hasn’t sorted out her feelings in an ideal way, and she will likely have several difficult, painful moments before she really comes to grips with that (and the presumably inevitable collapse of the Ethan relationship), but Joyce, the girl who shines with positivity and brings together people who would never anticipate finding friendship with someone like her, will use these as teaching moments, and her friends won’t her fall into such despair.

      Where you see only an extremist with religious views, there is a full, complicated character, with motives and emotions that you are too blinded by your distaste for her religious views to see.

      1. begbert2

        Joyce has an open, friendly side, which will inevitably crowd out and subsume her religious side. Sometime in the next five DoA years I’d say, which is around, um, two hundred fifty or so real-world years? But Joyce’s biggest problem isn’t her religion. It’s the fact that she has this core of rage, wrapped in a creamy marshmallow coating of crazy. And neither her religious upbringing nor her friendly personality have prepared her to deal with things that cause her to snap. And when she snaps, watch out – she’s out of control and can and will hurt you.

        In real life, rather than becoming subsumed by religion, I’d instead expect her to be arrested and possibly sent to prison sometime in the near future, as a result of one of these outbursts. (Amber would be in a similar boat, only moreso.) But this is a comic book world, so they’ll probably both escape any societal consequences of their ragey outbursts and violent actions.

      2. electronerd

        Willingness to learn and grow past her ignorance of the world? http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/02-guess-whos-coming-to-galassos/proven/

  53. All Else Fails

    *now playing Requiem For A Dream*

  54. D

    I know no one will likely see this down here, but doing a archive binge I found this strip: http://www.dumbingofage.com/2012/comic/book-2/04-time-keeps-on-slippin/transformers/

    After the “Girlfr— BEST friend” slip, oh, yeah, Joyce has PLENTY of reason for upset right now….

  55. kelticat

    I was just thinking that if Ethan had an interest in ladybits, he would be frozen out for a year after such a comment.
    But since the only ladybits he has shown a possible interest in belong to Jocelyn, the freeze isn’t likely to happen.

  56. Onion

    Shoulda known.

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