770

Nope
Posted on October 12, 2013 by David M Willis

770 thoughts on “Nope”

  1. vsophi

    I AM DYING INSIDE

    1. Yotomoe

      I warrrrrned you!!!

      1. Hoboturtle

        I warned you about the stairs bro!

        1. Shadow12000

          IT KEEPS HAPPENING!

        2. Shadow12000

          No really my gravatar changed again! And it’s Sal again! But it’s a different Sal! AHHHHHHHHHH!

        3. Curacaobill

          Them avatar shuffles man

        4. Jackson

          AGAIN with the shipping what IS it even with you and SHIPPING MAN

        5. Wixvhen

          Apparently he makes good boats.

        6. Kyrros

          I love how he’s looking straight through the 4th wall when he announces it in panel two.
          It’s like the artist knows he’s trolling or something :-p

    2. vsophi

      HERE IS THE FRUIT OF MY SHATTERED DREAMS

      /SOBS LOUDLY

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        I approve of your pic-fiction! 😀

      2. Anderhail

        Awesomely done!

      3. Pier

        Wow! You have my approval as well

      4. vsophi

        thanks ya’ll ; ~ ;

        (by the by, here’s the shirt joyce is wearing: http://www.zazzle.com/team_jesus_red_unisex_shirt_more_styles-235901143880908564)

      5. caesaria82

        That is amazing!

      6. Valdrax

        Oh, the tears of unfathomable shipper sadness! Mmm… yummy!
        </cartman>

      7. Passerby

        an act of sobomy.

      8. Undrave

        You’re version is clearly superior.

        1. E.R.

          I second this motion. Clearly Joyce/Dorothy is the appropriate ship.

        2. Thasvaddef

          Doyce or Jorothy?

        3. SplashOfBrown

          Agreed.

      9. PureFedora

        I want you to know that someone loves your picture and will save it to his computer and treasure it forever.

        1. vsophi

          I’m honored. ; w ;

          (this almost makes up for the worst shipwreck to date in the dumbiverse)

        2. Anime fan

          This is my favorite shipwreck ever. 🙂

        3. Leorale

          At least two people! T.T

        4. Leorale

          (heh my new Ethan avvy likes it too)

      10. Arkadi

        What should have been TwT

      11. Terabiel

        Awww, confused proto-les kisses!

      12. saltchocolate

        That is the cutest thing, vsophi! I feel your feels.

      13. ocbrad1

        Wonderful job with what should have been. Damn you, Willis!!! 🙂

      14. SplashOfBrown

        This is glorious :O

      15. Rodrigo

        Cool pic-fiction

    3. caesaria82

      Same.

    4. Jetstream

      ~\o

      I’m in the dance band on the Titanic
      Sing “Nearer, my God, to Thee”
      The iceberg’s on the starboard bow
      Won’t you dance with me

      o/~

      1. Terabiel

        Love that song. And yupyup.

        1. Jetstream

          Harry Chapin was a badass.

    5. Kyrros

      I love how he’s looking straight through the 4th wall when he announces it in panel two.
      It’s like the artist knows he’s trolling or something :-p

      1. Kyrros

        Oops, sorry about the 2x post :-\

  2. Yotomoe

    CALLED IT!!!!!
    *DANCES THE YOTOMOE VICTORY DANCE*

    1. Kernanator

      Well shit, looks like I owe you money.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Betting is a fools game… unless you’re already know the outcome that is.

        1. Spack

          No “unless” needed. It’s still a fool’s game, but in that scenario you are not the one who’s a fool

        2. Mr. Morningstar

          Then Willis should have put money on this.

        3. Thasvaddef

          That’s insider trading!

        4. Kelly

          He just needs to get elected to Congress, then it isn’t a problem!

    2. Gosei

      You are a modern prophet.

      1. The Candyman

        Nah, Yotomoe is a fortune cookie: he gives advice that no one listens to.

        1. Gosei

          In that case, what are my lucky numbers?

        2. Yotomoe

          4, 97, Q

        3. Gosei

          Thank you, oh wise one. You truly are the most intelligent and handsome of all.

        4. Pyr05

          Hike hike hike!

        5. saltchocolate

          I see what you did there, Pyr05.

        6. Tenn

          Q is the luckiest number for everyone, except Hongou and Kubota.

        7. Oxyvolt

          I love you for that reference.

        8. Tenn

          I love you for getting it.

        9. Narf

          Now Kiss!

        10. Blue

          Also Captain Picard.

        11. anonymous

          qqq spoilers

        12. saltchocolate

          Yotomoe, AKA Cassandra.

    3. Aizat

      You have a victory dance?

      1. Yotomoe

        Doesn’t everybody?

        1. NightmareWarden

          What is your victory song? You must have a song that you play while dancing the dance of victory! It’s a rule.

        2. Yotomoe

          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=8m4oeEUwADw

        3. Narf

          Sexiest victory song ever!

          Yeah, I said it.

        4. Hoboturtle

          Yah, but I reserve mine for when I kill something or sometimes when someone joins my party.

        5. Terabiel

          Yes. Mine is http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=p3G5IXn0K7A

        6. DEG1377

          I now hate you. That will be in my head all week.

        7. MIB4u

          Ouch.
          You do realize what song this is based on, right?
          http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PKYEKhxWy6o

        8. Kelly

          WTF? Hampsterdance is based on a song from Disney’s Robin Hood? That is so bizarre!

        9. Aizat

          Well, my victory dance is that I.R Baboon’s victory dance then followed up with a Cossack dance.

    4. Tahkuya

      same here, INTERNET HIGH FIVE

    5. Gamma Ray

      Well, guessing that Joshua was just stuck on a default happy-friendly-slightly awkward setting like Joyce was right. Even so, I liked that ship. It was an adorable ship. And now Godzillis has punted it clear across the Pacific rim.

      Also, is this the first strip where the title isn’t a word in the strip?

      1. vsophi

        naw, there’s been others

  3. TheOthin

    REJECTED

    1. Thor

      BRO-ZONED

      1. Aizat

        BRO-IN-LAW-ZONED!

        1. Spliced

          I got here late and OMG HE’S NOT GAY!!!!!

          and omg he’s gonna KILL Ethan…

          Also? Ethan? He’s serious about that bro-in-law thing… You probably don’t wanna say a comment that’s pretty much hitting-on-him territory at a time like this

        2. DudeMyDadOwnsADealership

          It IS Ethan, after all. Even if Joshua did play for the same team, it wouldn’t make him any less out of Ethan’s benchwarming league…

  4. KingMabel

    AAAAAAAANNNNNNNNNNNDDDDDDDDDDDDDDD ITS GONE!!!!

  5. Herohatch

    Nothing like clearing the air.

    1. KingMabel

      More like clearing the comments section…

    2. Historyman68

      Or the bowels.

      1. pudge

        they’re pretty much the same aren’t they?

  6. Shaggy-Donahugh

    I figured this is now called for.
    DAMN YOU WILLIS!

    1. That Damn Rat

      I second this motion, as you’ve doomed us all.

  7. Gottawonder

    I thought that was so. Dances with Yotomoe.
    Please excuse me, I got carried away. 🙂

    1. Yotomoe

      It’s taking all I have in me to not fill every comment with me bragging.

      1. Luzahn

        I am fully in support of this.

        Although now I just wonder what Joshua is actually concerned about. Go Yotomoe, whatever random thing you guess will probably be right. =P

        1. Makkabee

          He’s a closeted secular humanist, maybe?

        2. xKiv

          He *thought* ha was gay, so he dated a boy, but he turned out to not be gay.
          (for both values of “he”)

        3. vsophi

          This seems like a very real possibility to me.

  8. Gosei

    I knew it.

  9. Pier

    I AM EXTREMELY DISAPPOINT!

  10. rachel

    “… Oh.”

    That, my friends, was the sound of my heart BREAKING IN TWO

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      I can hear the sound of a ship been torn open by by an iceburg.

      1. Core279

        And that Iceberg is Willis. >.>

      2. Historyman68

        Willis is the Titanic and the Iceberg.

        1. Mr. Morningstar

          He might as well be the freezing ocean that kills one of the lovers at the end.

        2. AckackAck

          Plot twist: Ethan snapped, killed Joshua and freeze him in the fridge.

  11. Kernanator

    Oh damn, we got PLAYED.

    DAMN YOU WILLIS.

  12. Bek359

    Thank you, Joshua. The sooner Ethan realizes that this sham of a relationship is NOT EVER going to work out, the better.

    1. Yotomoe

      True Shit.

    2. Thor

      It’s not Joshua’s call. It’s Ethan and Joyce’s.

      1. Historyman68

        Yeah, but sometimes people need feedback to realize how dumb they’re being.

        1. garaden

          Yeah, it’s pretty clear that Ethan is one stern look away from dropping the charade.

          …or at least I hope so. 🙁

        2. Heavensrun

          Obviously not, since Ethan already got a seriously stern look, and talking to, from Amber. I’m starting to feel like this isn’t going to go away until he’s macking with another guy and Joyce is crying.

          And godsdamn, I’m really starting to hate him for it.

        3. vsophi

          Actually, I think Joyce will be the one to break it off. She’s been showing loads of potential for growth in just the first month of college. I mean, hell, standing up for her atheist friend in front of her fundie, bigoted parents? Wow. Ethan, on the other hand, is still as fucked up as ever. He’ll get dumped and realize with the way things are now, all he can ever be is alone.

          Joshua could have been out. He might’ve been the one thing that could snap Ethan out of it. But with this blatant rejection, all Ethan’s gonna feel is hopeless.

          …And so ends my incredibly depressing take on Ethan’s life. Come to think of it, I think this is why I sympathize with Ethan more than anyone else on the cast. As least the others have people. Even Sal has Marcie, and to some extent, Jason. Mike is an awful friend, and Amber certainly can’t be there for him with everything that’s going on with her now.

          …Come to think of it, Amber’s pretty alone in this too. Damn, why do all the SP! people have to be so goddamned miserable?

        4. vsophi

          an* out, soz

        5. Jack Finch

          And those dreams (ok it was a nightmare) and associated feels are only gonna build, not go away.

        6. The E-man

          I s2g vsophi why are you trying to make everyone even more miserable.

        7. vsophi

          because clearly overanalyzing recklessly feels-inducing webcomics is my special interest

        8. Jack Finch

          My new prediction for a future storyline…some of them get into group therapy together. Results are…um…mixed.

        9. Galatine

          Also, when the entire thing first started, Mike gave as clear an indication of his disapproval as he ever does. When you’ve shocked Mike, you should probably reevaluate your life.

    3. Dicrel Seijin

      Sometimes it takes someone from the outside looking in to show how dysfunctional things have gotten. I really hope Ethan and Joyce break up, this relationship is doing neither of them any good, at all.

    4. AckackAck

      Joshua is in, shit just got real.

  13. Ragnal

    Wh-no?

    WHATTYA MEAN NO?! It-I-abhjg-

    …It seemed so…

    …I feel like nothing I say will keep me from developping foot in mouth disease, but man…

    1. Yotomoe

      Foots disease, the cousin of Butts disease.

      1. AgentKeen

        Also closely related to ‘Red Foreman Disease’, also known as a foot up your ass.

    2. Undrave

      Maybe those friends of his are a gay couple though. Would explain a thing or two I guess.

      1. Pier

        Drew and Manny gay couple as Joshua’s guy friends. Oh the twist.

  14. Sammie1053

    *Plays taps*
    In honor of the lives lost in the sinking of the USS Joshuthan. Never forget.

    1. KingMabel

      May I speak?

      This ship fueled many comments and fanfics, and lived in the hearts of many. BUT I TOLD YOU! I TOLD YOU ALL!

      R.I.P.

    2. Yotomoe

      We shall bury them next to the FazxDina ship victims…
      They never made it out of the harbor.

      1. Sammie1053

        Some say you can still see the FazxDina sailing along the horizon at twilight, stern emblazoned with charts and grappling hooks for rigging.
        But most people accept that it burnt to the ground while still in the drydock.

        1. Passerby

          It did not burn. It was destroyed by a host of triceratops.

        2. NightmareWarden

          Plesiosaurs patrol the remains underwater lest zombie pirates resurrect it and sail it on the seas against the wishes of all.

        3. The Phantom's Belch

          FazxDina was destroyed in drydock but not burned to the ground. We have the tools, we have the technology. We can make it stronger, faster, better…. FAZXDINA WILL BE THE MODERN MEGALODON!

          Ah, who’m I kidding?

        4. AckackAck

          Even when we rebuild it it will have self destruct button installed.

      2. Rani

        Yotomoe, what’s this “we” all about? If Willis sank the Joshuthan, you were the dick on the UBoat who kept machine gunning the survivors and laughing maniacally.

        1. Yotomoe

          I’m more like the guy who kept warning people not to get so cocky when they built the Titanic. And they just refused to listen to me.

        2. insomniac

          THEY! DIDN’T! LISTEN!

        3. The Candyman

          But no one wanted to believe…believe Joshua could ever be straight. And when the truth finally dawns, it dawns in fire!

      3. Sam

        Everyone knows that ship never existed, no matter how hard delusional people insist on it.

    3. caesaria82

      Pfffft. Non-canonical ships are the best ships. This ship lives. In the heards and minds of the people, it will always live.

      1. Historyman68

        Airships.

      2. stevecharb

        The pairing goes on, the slash endures, the hoe-yay still lives, and the ship will never die.

  15. Wonder Wig

    So if Joshua isn’t gay does this mean…. he’s Amazi-Girl!?

    1. Totz the Plaid

      No…

      Clearly Amber’s Amazi-Girl.

      I know, I know, it sounds impossible, but I believe in my heart that it’s true.

      1. Gosei

        By that logic… Danny’s gay?

        1. vsophi

          everyone is gay

        2. Gosei

          Except Joshua.

        3. Chubsius

          Someone’s gotta be bi.

        4. Vex Godglove

          Except Joshua.

        5. Gosei

          Ha, beat ya to it.

        6. Vex Godglove

          Well played.

        7. Wonder Wig

          Everyone can be gay! And when everyone’s gay muahahahaha… No one will be.

        8. Pier

          Love the syndrome reference

      2. Rani

        No, that means he’s Amber, stupid. Haven’t you read anything? 🙂

  16. March

    And the big brother comes out swinging! Though I’m not sure how much protection Joyce actually needs. Maybe some more exposure to the world at large.

    1. Bill

      I should have done more of this for my little sister.

      1. Historyman68

        Were there a lot of gay dudes dating your sister?

        1. Megatron

          That was my question.

        2. Bill

          No, but for some reason she seemed to be a magnet for losers.  Even ended up marrying one of ’em.  Didn’t last, fortunately; otherwise it wouldn’t have been “Goodbye, Earl” for real.

    2. Drakey

      I’m pretty sure what the big brother just did was not to “come out” swinging, given the context. We must avoid euphamistic confusion.

      He arrived swinging.

      Now we just need for him to tell his parents about his harem of sexbots that are the only thing he’s attracted to.

      1. nick

        So wait – Joshua is Malaya?

        1. Crimson Doom

          Uncertain Joyce is the best gravatar for that comment. ^.^

    3. ocbrad1

      “Big brother comes out swinging.” I see what I wanted you to do there, lol!

  17. Yotomoe

    Haha, Ethan. Now the guy you like knows you’re a dick. And you don’t even get to make out with him.l

  18. J42

    I swear to you, at this very moment I was just drawing fan art of them about to make out. Now I must destroy it.

    1. vsophi

      at least you didn’t already draw and it and were waiting for the perfect moment to unleash it upon the world EXCEPT THAT MOMENT NEVER CAME AND NOW I THINK I HAVE RESTLESS LEG SYNDROME I CAN’T STOP SHAKING FROM THE RESIDUAL EXCITEMENT AND SUBSEQUENT DISAPPOINTMENT

      1. Yotomoe

        I WARNED YOUUUUU

        1. vsophi

          DAMMIT YOTOMOE

        2. KingMabel

          For the record I love how your gravatar works so well for the entirety of this page

      2. vsophi

        can you tell I have a bad case of the nerves

      3. J42

        I know that feel, fellow marooned ship-sailor.

      4. caesaria82

        Are you ok? I feel like you need a hug. Or to punch something. Go punch something. It helps!

        I feel you though. I feel you. *hugs*

      5. Makkabee

        Could be worse. Could be transient pedal parasthesia.

      6. Historyman68

        Hey man, it could happen. Probably won’t, in all likelihood it won’t… but it *could*!

      7. Arkadi

        Don’t be like that. The ship will live on in our hearts!

    2. Kernanator

      No no, continue. I mean, since when has ship-feasibility ever stopped us from drawing fanarts before?

      1. Yotomoe

        I’m pretty sure I drew Faz X Dina… like 2 or 3 times.

        1. Aizat

          And some of us is still looking for a proper brain bleach for that.

        2. Curacaobill

          I just used brain wash. It cleans out the bad memories good and doesn’t stain clothes

      2. J42

        It’s very rare that one member of the pairing explicitly states to the other that he’s not gay. Our ship’s taken a canonball.

        1. Kernanator

          Bah! Less sturdy ships have sailed the seas before!

        2. Passerby

          If Willis wants to pull the double-reverse, Joshua is an ex-gay. Or bisexual. Truthful answer from his perspective either way.

          (I am not, repeat not, saying that will happen)

        3. The Phantom's Belch

          I wholeheartedly endorse the bisexual bit. We need more male bis to come out.

          I need the company.

        4. Curacaobill

          He could be in the closet REAL hard

    3. Keroshino

      Don’t do it…please continue to draw in defiance of the current situation!

  19. mechaqua

    That ship sunk pretty f%%&&*g quickly! Rage torpedo’s away!

  20. Keroshino

    And the answer: HE’S NOT GAY!

    Audience: Nooooooooooooooo!

    1. Yotomoe

      Except Yotomoe who is dancing around like an ass.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Twerk that ass! (_._)

        1. Pyr05

          Very disturbed by this comment and grav. Way to go Plasma

        2. Plasma Mongoose

          You’re welcome! ^_^

        3. ocbrad1

          Unlike Pyr, I find your Grav perfectly suited to the comment. The image of Yotomoe twerking, well, can’t be much worse than Miley’s VMA gig.

    2. Casey

      *frank n furter voice* not gay? I think we can do better than that

      1. Kiggy

        Kudos for that shout out.

    3. Jack Finch

      Correction: He’s not “actually” gay. That word use is bugging me. Either it’s just overly casual usage, or it means “in spite of the evidence”.

      1. Leorale

        I figured it meant he’s been asked more than once before, and has had people surprised that he’s straight. I’d’ve probably asked too if I was a gay-or-bi dude at his college.

    4. Ourorboros

      Interesting use of the word ‘actually’.
      So does Joshua mean he knows he seems that way?
      Or that he is bi? Has experimented? Seems kind of effeminate?

  21. Gottawonder

    And so then what is it> ‘her parents’. Or is he transsexual?
    Gottawonder.

    1. Shaggy-Donahugh

      Is he athiest? A man who has sinned by knowing another woman outside of marriage? Did he use God’s-name-in-vain-that-one-time? IS HE COMPLETELY NORMAL!
      Who friggin knows anymore.

      1. Yotomoe

        Maybe he’s just a teenager so he’s like “THEY JUST DON’T UNDERSTAND ME” while he shops at Hot Topic.

        1. The Candyman

          Seeing things so far, this’ll probably be what happens.

        2. Plasma Mongoose

          Maybe he doesn’t want to tell them that he’s from a mirror universe and that he killed the real Josh and took his place.

        3. Aizat

          Or he’s an alien who killed Josh and is currently inhabiting his dead body.

      2. He'Stan

        He held a girl’s hand in 1st grade. He knows this cannot be forgiven.

        1. Plasma Mongoose

          I wonder if he wants some sugar-water.

        2. Glynvel

          And then Rip Torn could hire us to hunt him down!

    2. Doctor_Who

      Transsexual would be a new one.

      Or hell, maybe he just doesn’t see eye to eye with his parents. God knows I wouldn’t.

      1. EvergreenFir

        I’m going for this one… transgender or some other queer identity

        1. Bill

          Does everybody (except for maybe Joyce) in this strip have to be something other that plain vanilla?  Even the LGBTQs themselves cite figures that say maybe 10% of the general population is something other than straight.  Push the envelope a little bit, sure, but let’s not skew the stats way out of all proportion!!

        2. vsophi

          Diversity is interesting. It’d be cool to see how Willis writes a trans character, or a bi male character (who isn’t an asshole).

        3. He'Stan

          Yeah, but this is a fictional universe. It could be that everyone is assumed to be trans until proven otherwise.

        4. garaden

          Whuh? The density isn’t *that* high. Danny, Dorothy, Walky, Joe, Roz, Sal, Penny, Jason, (presumably) Dina, (presumably) Sarah, are all straight. Billie’s bi, Ethan’s gay, Ruth’s most likely lesbian, Amber has a thing for super suits and Mike lusts for human suffering and/or your mom. So there’s a lot of unusual stuff but Joyce isn’t the only straight person!

        5. vsophi

          Ruth’s pretty much not a lesbian.

        6. EvergreenFir

          She’s attracted to some women.

        7. vsophi

          Yes, but Willis himself said she was not.

          She still does fall under the LGBTQ spectrum though. /nitpicking for a second there

        8. ocbrad1

          Ruth did tell Howard that she was into girls, so at least bi if not a lesbian waiting for full realization.

        9. Araceli

          How would it be unrealistic? It’s a small group of people–the cast isn’t going to represent global trends right down to the percent, y’know?

          Even if there were fifteen trans* characters in this comic, it still wouldn’t be weird because that’s only /fifteen/ people out of /seven billion/ worldwide and, like, 6.5 million in Indiana. Not exactly a huge sample, dig?

        10. xKiv

          Oh! He’s an 11-percenter! He sold his soul!

      2. EvergreenFir

        I’ll also put $2 on “furry”. Another $2 on “otter” as his fursona

        1. vsophi

          I’m guessing ‘cuz otters are adorable? And otters with glasses are even more adorable?

          …’k, adorabling myself into the ground here

        2. Doctor_Who

          An otter with glasses would indeed measure about 600 milliDinas on the adorability scale.

        3. xKiv

          harry otter?

      3. Cass

        That’s what the “actually” was making me think too, it’s such an odd way to put it that I could see it being that either Joshua likes guys but is actually a straight woman born in the wrong body, or Joshua is a transvestite (and presumably Joyce has caught him in drag once or twice, and he assumes she told Ethan for him to be asking this) and the “actually” means “liking to dress in drag does not always equal gay, watch Eddie Izzard Dressed to Kill sometime Ethan, he does a whole bit about that”.

        1. fit-to-freak

          Just a heads up, but generally the terminology of ‘born in the wrong body’ is not preferred and pretty much never use the word tr*ns*xual unless someone specifically identifies that way.

      4. Roborat

        I don’t think even God would.

    3. TheOthin

      “Not ACTUALLY gay”. He knows people would assume it – probably used to it. And he was looking away. He’s got something he’s not sharing.

      1. Luzahn

        This was my first thought, but I’m actually worried that he’s hiding something on the other edge of what his parents would disapprove of. Some sort of…super-fundamentalist, I dunno.

        1. Jack Finch

          Look at him. He’s a Mormon.

      2. Raen

        Well… we all assumed it, didn’t we?

        1. Raen

          (Except Yotomoe, that it.)

        2. Raen

          …

          *is.

      3. Pier

        Make him Bi 🙁

        1. vsophi

          let it go pier
          let it go

        2. Pier

          /sob. At least make Drew happen.

        3. vsophi

          why would you want drew to happen again
          ethan’s already broken enough

      4. saltchocolate

        This word does seem important, doesn’t it?! “Actually.” “Not *actually.*”

      5. Kitkewl

        Actually, to me it looks like Joshua is looking at the fourth wall… right at us. It’s Willis’s way of mocking us.

    4. Raen

      He’s converted to Islam / Baha’i / Wicca?

      (…that is, one of those three, not some kind of syncre… hmm… *I put on my robe and prophet hat*)

  22. The Candyman

    I do believe that both Willis and Yotomoe deserve the highest of fives right now.

    1. vsophi

      all willis deserves is a DAMN YOU WILLIS

      1. Luzahn

        I’m pretty sure he always deserves that though.

        1. Tenn

          He has “DAMN YOU WILLIS” painted in the ceiling above his bed so he sees it at least twice a day, in case no one remembers to say it.

  23. caesaria82

    This was inevitable, wasn’t it? I am sad.

    ~ I will go down with this ship
    I won’t put my hands up and surrender
    There will be no white flag above my door
    I’m in love and always will beeeee~

  24. Nocxbot

    Ethan looks like a very disheartened mime in that last panel.

  25. ShadowWing Tronix

    Someday we’ll be expecting the twist that will never come. And Willis will sit back on his Taco Bell throne and laugh maniacally.

  26. someguywithakatana

    Called it. Caaaaaaaaalled it.

    Also, quick question. How can everyone tell Ethan is gay like… right away…? Is he really effeminate or something? Because this is apparently really obvious to everyone around him.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Ethan emits enough gaydiation to set off some people’s gaydar.

      1. Yotomoe

        Joyce’s Gaydar is broken.

        1. Astraea

          No, no, Joyce’s gaydar can’t be broken if it was never developed. I say this from experience because, up until 3/4s through high school, neither was mine (and it still isn’t great…)

        2. Curacaobill

          My gaydar only seems to detect lesbians.

        3. Leorale

          Could I borrow it, then?

      2. someguywithakatana

        Why though!?! I mean his shirt and his weird blush make him look like a mime, but that isn’t gay. It’s just French-

        Oh yeah, okay. That makes sense.

        1. Plasma Mongoose

          As someone of Norman decent, I am obligated to protest this French = effeminate idea.

        2. someguywithakatana

          I know, I know. But as an uneducated American, I was obligated to make it.

        3. garaden

          I feel like if you see a dude in America and they’re wearing clothing that can be described as “flattering”, there’s a stronger chance they’re either gay or European (or Dorothy’s boyfriend).

          But seriously, I work for a British company, and some of our managers…if I just saw them on the street and didn’t hear their accents they’d throw my gaydar *way* off.

    2. vsophi

      He’s defs not effeminate (least not as far as I can tell), but he was flirting pretty hard with Josh back when they first me.

      1. vsophi

        met*

    3. Sammie1053

      Willis doesn’t write the dialogue that way but if you meet him in person Ethsn has a super-thick lisp.

      1. vsophi

        I DIED

      2. Salmo

        His name is actually Esan.

      3. fit-to-freak

        Can people like, stop? I know you’re just trying to be funny but it’s kinda fucked up. This goes for all the ‘effeminate’ jokes people were making too… It’s kinda gross and it makes me uncomfortable.

    4. caesaria82

      Some people just have really good gaydar? It’s a bit of an offensive and generalizing concept, really, on the whole, but hasn’t that ever happened to you that you thought someone was gay and you turned out to be right? It happens. All the time.

      1. vsophi

        Confirmation bias is a thing, though.

        1. caesaria82

          Absolutely! I’m just saying, it happens. It happens to me a lot. I’m quite good at this with girls, especially. Idk. Sure, you make assumptions, but that’s not even what I mean. It’s just a feeling, to me anyways. Nothing specific.

        2. Drakey

          Man, I live a stone’s throw away from Portland Oregon. Statistically, I’m pretty sure everyone is either gay, vegan, or high.

          I’m okay with this, as it means that there’s gay people, and that they skew supply and demand in favor of cheaper cheeseburgers for when I get the munchies.

        3. garaden

          I’m much better at that with guys than girls. I had a bit of a crush on a girl at my youth group who turned out to be a lesbian. …*pretty* sure she’s not a Catholic anymore.

    5. Touchfuzzy

      If it detects gaydiation… wouldn’t it be more of a gayger counter than a gaydar?

      1. vsophi

        +1

      2. Glynvel

        +1

      3. Pier

        haha +1 for you

      4. Curacaobill

        The +1’s just won’t stop!

    6. Heavensrun

      I believe it mostly has to do with the fact that the instant he meets a cute guy, he straigtens up, locks into “engage flirting” mode, and immediately starts broadcasting “I FIND YOU PHYSICALLY ATTRACTIVE” signals.

      Body language is a thing.

      1. Kernanator

        What, no it’s not, you’re a liar.

        1. Heavensrun

          Maybe. But how will you tell if my words don’t give it away?
          MWAHAHAAHAHHAHAA!

    7. ConstantComment

      SP! Ethan was never very subtle about checking guys out or flirting with them. I think he’s a pretty easy person to read when it comes to telling who he is attracted to no matter what his gender performance might be.

      1. vsophi

        What? When was Ethan like this at all in SP!…? He didn’t do it for Thad, Drew, or Manny… Like, I mean, I guess he sorta did it with Mike, but only Mike. Ethan has never been particularly interested in romance/sex.

    8. DavidMcG

      His haircut.

  27. HMRC4EVR

    Oh no….THE TWIST!

    Eh…I was fine either way. Now I have to wonder what other issue(s) might Joshua might have that would make his parents go apecrazy?

    1. Rosie

      What a twist! /shymalan

    2. hoop

      He’s an atheist.

      1. Vim-Hogar

        Or maybe he’s a god!

  28. Plasma Mongoose

    If he’s not gay, is he secretly an atheist or an otaku instead?

    1. Sporky

      I’m gonna guess the former.

    2. Doctor_Who

      He’s a brony.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        An atheist brony who doesn’t believe that friendship is magic because none of that supernatural nonsense exists. 😛

        1. Yotomoe

          He watches MLP but he’s super annoying cuz everytime something magical happens he’s like “YEAH RIGHT! Like hell that happens.”

        2. Doctor_Who

          He’s currently working on a fan remake that will be more realistic, as well as darker and edgier. That’s why he came along to visit Joyce. It will give him a chance to meet his online writing partner in person, who also goes to this school; Buckets O’ Blood Guy!

          Or it could be Mike. Pinkie Pie’s his favorite.

        3. Heavensrun

          In Josh’s fanfic, Pinkie lives with him in his mom’s basement and helps him with his problems like telling him it’s okay if he doesn’t want to get a regular job right now.

        4. vsophi

          joshua’s an mra

        5. The Candyman

          Nah, his parents would probably approve of that.

        6. IndigoRei

          None of the paranormal stuff I have experienced has lead to believe in a god or gods. And I know christians who don’t beleive in the supernatural. It may seem paradoxical but religion and the supernatural really don’t have much to do with each other.

    3. Aizat

      Or that he’s a cyborg ninja.

      1. Keroshino

        So your saying he’s secretly…Grey Fox!?

        1. Aizat

          Well either he’s Grey Fox or Olga Gurlukovich…or Raiden.

  29. Anderhail

    (╯°□°）╯︵ ┻━┻

    1. Bill

      AGAIN with the tables?
      ┬─┬ノ( º _ ºノ)

      1. Aizat

        THROW THE CHEESE!

        1. AckackAck

          No! cheese is for eating!

      2. vsophi

        (╯°Д°）╯︵/(.□ . \)

  30. Totz the Plaid

    Bi is still a possibility.

    Probably not, but possible.

    Also, pansexual.

    Still, I doubted that Joshua and Ethan would get it on because we’ve already got a ton of regulars, and having him move to the area felt unlikely.

    1. Yotomoe

      And also Ethan’s kind of dick moving it here.

      1. Heavensrun

        NO JOKE. “Man, I sure would like to be straight so I can flee my own emotional needs and the inconvenience of my situation. I know, I’ll become the boyfriend of a naive homeschooled fundie christian girl and pretend she can convert me! Then the -instant- her cute brother shows up, I’ll make a pass at him. Oooh! Then later that evening, when she’s risking her entire familial relationship, when she could use the moral support of at -least- a friend, if not her ‘boyfriend’, I’ll slip away so I can hit on her brother some more!”

    2. vsophi

      I doubt he’d say it like that if he was bi. It’d prolly go a little something like this if that was the case:

      Ethan: Is it… Is it because you’re gay?
      Joshua: Not exactly… [blushy face] I’m… well, the possibilities are endless, you know?
      Ethan: Wait, so you’re…
      Joshua: Bisexual.
      Ethan: Oh. [intense feelings of deja vu from the last time a cute, blonde-haired, blue-eyed guy told him he was bi]

      Then, makeouts.

      1. Sammie1053

        Buh-
        Wh-
        WHY WOULD YOU COMMENT THIS?!
        It’s what we were all hoping for but didn’t get! (Well, all except Yotomoe)
        You just evoked all of my feels.

        1. vsophi

          epic fanfic that maps to every strip proceeding, only it’s set in a world where this happened

        2. Pier

          *loud sobbing*

      2. Xerxes93

        Actually, as a bisexual “not actually a lesbian” is generally exactly how I put it. I just end the statement with “I’m bi” afterwards.

        1. saltchocolate

          This is my thought.

      3. NF

        Ethan/Mike?

        1. vsophi

          nawp, this guy right here.

          he’s a lot cuter (and douchier) later

      4. Totz the Plaid

        “The possibilities are endless” would fall more under pansexual or polysexual, really.

        Pansexual is loving someone for their personality.

        Polysexual is understanding the concept that gender isn’t necessarily binary and having an attraction to the whole spectrum.

        1. vsophi

          Not everyone knows that pan is a thing.

          In fact, it’s likely the vast majority of people here wouldn’t have even heard of it if not for the internet.

          Also, your definitions confuse me. I’m pretty sure the ways you’re using pansexual and polysexual are interchangeable.

        2. Miss Lejion

          No his definitions are correct.

          Pan-sexuality requires some form of courtship/getting to know you period. And then maybe they can fuck. A key example of this would be the Doctor as he tends to push away everyone physically until they know each other much better.

          Poly-sexuality allows for raw lustfully feelings off the bat. Like say, Captain Jack Harkness who would make woopie with literally anything if it was attractive enough

          And I am saying Joshua is either asexual or transgender.

        3. vsophi

          Uh, no. Your definition of pan sounds a bit closer to panromantic demisexual. Pansexuality is just loving/being attracted to someone regardless of gender. The way you’re using “polysexual” is the same thing.

        4. JustDucky

          Seconded.

          As I understand it, pansexual is “sexually attracted to all genders,” polysexual is “sexually attracted to more than one gender” (so for example someone who is polysexual might be attracted to cis men and trans women but not to trans men or cis women), and polyamory is “in love with more than one person at a time.”

          I’ve also heard the term “biromantic” used to mean “able to fall in love with both men and women” and that seems like a relevant distinction to me. There are bisexual people who are not biromantic.

        5. JustDucky

          Damn it, I got Ethan. >.<'

        6. vsophi

          Haven’t heard that definition of polysexual before. Actually, tbh, I’ve never heard anyone use the term in normal conversation before either. Pansexuality, as far as I can tell, seems to cover it. However, people may identify as they wish.

          (polyamory isn’t necessarily being in love with multiple people at once – it just communicates a willingness or desire to be with multiple people, even if the person in question is not interested in anyone at the time)

        7. Azaph

          Yeah, you DO need poly for people who’re attracted to more than two genders, but less than all of them (this is quite a large range to hit, y’know?).
          Every -sexual orientation also has a -romantic counterpart. Biromantic, polyromantic, homoromantic, aromantic (NTBCW aromatic)…

  31. He'Stan

    Dammit Willis, this is Kubo-level trolling.

    1. tyren22

      Damn, that’s harsh.

  32. Paul

    Fandom=Trolled.

  33. norj

    Joshua not gay? But that does not compute.

    1. Yotomoe

      My processor Computed it!

      1. Pyr05

        You’re at a processing level that exceeds this current space/time continuum. You must be destroyed to preserve the future of hope.

    2. JK9000

      When enough signs point to a particular conclusion, that’s often a hint that it’s the wrong conclusion.

      In fiction, anyway.

      1. Yotomoe

        When you assume, you make an ass outta Uma Thurman.

        1. Tenn

          Or make out with Uma Thurman’s ass.

        2. ocbrad1

          I approve highly of Uma Thurman’s ass, and making out with it!

  34. EvergreenFir

    What an odd thing to say… “I’m not actually gay”… but it hasn’t been established that people in the universe think he is

    1. norj

      He secretly writes for a gay porn magazine?

      1. Bill

        I called porn yesterday.

        1. Yotomoe

          Acceptable answer.

    2. vsophi

      HE’S AN MSM

  35. EvergreenFir

    Also… it was National Coming Out Day yesterday… you couldn’t have given us that one thing?

    1. Pier

      /Sobbing

      1. Keroshino

        I know how you feel…let it out…let the tears flow! 🙁

    2. caesaria82

      Wound, meet salt.

      1. Sammie1053

        The WoundxSalt ship is too obvious, Willis will sink that one too tomorrow.

        1. vsophi

          too many +1s

    3. AckackAck

      Well, Ethan coming out to Joshua….

  36. derick

    I’m stuck between “Hah, I knew he wasn’t gay” and “Dammit Willis, I was shipping those two!”

  37. skies

    This may not be the case, but there’s absolutely nothing in this strip that says he’s not bisexual.

    1. Raen

      I’m not sure his response makes sense that way. I get a “you’re on the wrong track” vibe here, not “close but no cigar.”

      1. Lanval

        I dunno, if Josh is Bi, he might have assumed Ethan was also Bi [which would explain why he’s dating his sister]. This would be pretty much exactly what Ethan did when they assumed Josh was Gay [as well as many in the Audience who were seeing it from Ethan’s perspective].

        So now they’re having a wonderful moment of;
        “You’re not Gay?”
        “You’re not Bi? Why are you dating a girl?”

        Granted there are a tonne of other possibilities and I’m interested to see where this goes.

        1. vsophi

          This actually sounds totally plausible, thinking on it.

          I hope to Cheese you’re right.

        2. saltchocolate

          Agreed. I think part of what makes it hard to know where Joshua’s coming from is that he may be more concerned about his sister than his own sexuality, right now. I mean, even if he was gay, wouldn’t it be an asshole move to date (or even flirt with) his *sister’s boyfriend*? He has brought up Joyce in the last two strips, and it’s clear he’s thinking that Ethan should gave been the one doing that…

      2. Tofusmith

        Or maybe he’s bi, but not *single*?

      3. Jesse

        SHUT UP HE’S BISEXUAL DAMMIT!

        1. Raen

          Catchphrase of fangirls everywhere since March 6, 2000.

  38. BayoWolf

    Well, that’s one hell of a slap in the face for Ethan and readers alike. So I guess Joshua just has a generic sort of artist’s inner turmoil?

    1. hoop

      aaaaatheist.

  39. Aizat

    And Willis just drop the iceberg on the ship. Is it too late to call Willis Master of Swerves?

    1. Shaggy-Donahugh

      Swerve what? HE DROPPED A DAMNED ICEBERG ON THE SHIP!
      “Oh Captain, look at that iceberg.”
      “Hm, yes Corporal Jefferies, maybe we should-”
      SPLOOOSH
      And the band just keeps right on playing.

      1. Casey

        Are… Are the fans the band in this analogy as we grasp onto the word “actually” and the small window of hope it has left us, despite our ship sinking about us?

    2. Rani

      Master of Fucks, Giver of None.

    3. Ragnal

      Good swerves, maybe.

      Vince Russo still holds the crown for bad ones, tho.

      1. Rani

        Nice to see a fellow member of the WWF/E/Dumbing of Age crossover demographic.

  40. Tyler

    Fear not! He hasn’t said that he’s straight, only that he isn’t gay. Bi is still technically on the table.

    1. Aizat

      Or he could be asexual.

      1. Yotomoe

        Or he could be pansexual.
        I never understood what people see in pans, but whatever.

        1. Aizat

          Dude, I’ve heard stories of folks having sexual intercourse with a damn table….in public. Doing a pan is the least weird thing I’ve heard.

        2. Yotomoe

          Ouch! Splinters!

        3. xKiv

          I hear this Pan dude was actually pretty good with the ladies.

  41. Pyr05

    He’s not actually gay, he just likes the look of a good shaft. He’s not actually gay, he just loves everyone’s butts, especially those on dudes.

    1. Batfangirl!

      I just had to drop in to say that this quote wins the internet.

  42. caesaria82

    Guys, this ship is so not dead. That’s the whole point of ships. They survive stuff like this. They’re fantasy and wish-fulfillment. Like, I have shipped things where one person DIED and I still ship it. This? This is nothing. I laugh in the face of a little non-gay-ness.

    1. David

      Like, I have shipped things where one person DIED and I still ship it.
      “Seemannstreue” by Joachim Ringelnatz (the link got one word wrong). There is even an animated Youtube video, but it’s lacking the grossiosity of the poem. A literal translation would be “Sailor’s faithfulness”, a fitting paraphrase “The sailor always rings twice”. Google translate would probably deliver something not half as awful as the original.

      1. David

        Make that “the sailor always ships twice”. Drats.

  43. vsophi

    Okay, so everyone’s commenting on how weirdly he worded his confession (???)…

    …The thing is though, that line is totally consistent with Joshua knowingly leading Ethan on earlier. wtf

    1. Aizat

      Maybe he wanted to know what kind of person Ethan really is. That or the leading on part was unintentional.

    2. Sammie1053

      Maybe he was leading him on to test his theory that Ethan was gay in order to try and protect his little sister.
      Damm, i just used a watertight argument to sink one of my favorite ships even further.

      1. Lanval

        It’s fun for drama but I wouldn’t call it a water tight argument; trying to prove your sibling’s SO is gay by leading them on is pretty disfunctional.

        Not to claim the Browns as bastions of functionality but I’m going to split my bet between Bi-Sexual and Terminator from the Heteronormative Future sent to the past in order to destroy Ethan and thus crush the LGTBQ resistance before it begins.

        1. Zach

          Then thank Cheese that the dissolution of hetero-normativity is self perpetuating. Viva la resistance!

      2. vsophi

        But what reason would he have to suspect Etham was gay?

        New theory, though: Josh is an MSM.

        1. vsophi

          tfw you see your typo as it’s posting but you can do absolutely nothing to correct it

        2. Lanval

          Ethan gives off the vibe in the comic, especially when he’s around Joyce.

          Sara put the pieces together in all but three seconds. I sort of assumed it was a running joke in this verse that pretty much everyone but Joyce [and her parents] realized it within a minute of meeting him because he was so awkward.

        3. Jonathan S.

          MSM?

          He’s a Magnetic Shape Memory?

          Methysulfonylmethane?

          A Master-Slave Manipulator?

          He has a Master of Science in Management? Possibly from the Mercator School of Management?

          He speaks Modern Standard Mandarin while playing with the Miami Sound Machine on Mont Saint-Michel?

        4. vsophi

          Men who have sex with men. A lot of them identify as straight, they’re just hot for other dudes.

        5. Yotomoe

          …
          I know I should respect people’s sexuality and all that jazz but…
          seriously?
          I’m sorry but no. I just sounds like DENIAL.

          It’s basically the sexual version of “I’M NOT FAT, I’M BIG BONED”

        6. Lanval

          Have you looked at the rest of this family?

          His Sister is dating someone who’s outright told her he’s gay.
          His Dad thinks hanging out with Atheists is basically morally equivalent to hanging out with Prostitutes and that Hitler was Probably Part Jewish.
          And, well, general concensus is that his Mom is the worst of the pack.

          Denial seems pretty realistic here.

          My money is still on either Bi or “Heavens, no. I’m not gay, I prayed it away in summer camp years ago”.

        7. Zach

          S&M! It need not even necessarily be sexual. I can get behind MSM to some extent. Romantic and sexual attractions can be separate, and are for most people. Does having good manners turn you on or do you find it charming?

        8. Heavensrun

          I think Yoto’s talking about MSM, not Joshua in particular.

        9. vsophi

          It’s probably exceedingly rare, but there’s likely at least one heteroromantic homosexual out there.

        10. Anonymous man

          Male sexuality can be complicated. Imagine a man who is not attracted to body hair or male curves, but who enjoys being penetrated in various ways. Such a man might have sex with men for the physical feeling, without being visually attracted to men enough to consider himself gay.

          So? Who says he has to be “gay” or “straight” or whatever your label scheme suggests?

        11. Ragnal

          I usually refer to that as “heteroflexible”, but that works I guess.

        12. AckackAck

          sophi calm down, it seems like you getting a bit too attached on this ship.

        13. vsophi

          why does everyone seem to think this

          I am literally just throwing out every half-baked idea/theory in my head for funsies.

        14. Pier

          Cease the non-believer!! Burn the witch!!

          Haha. Just messing with ‘ya.

        15. Heavensrun

          The fact that Ethan started putting the moves on him the instant they met?

    3. Heavensrun

      He didn’t lead Ethan on. He was conversing with him, and you can pretty much see the moment he caught on to what was going on, at which point he left immediately.

      1. saltchocolate

        +1

  44. PureLionHeart

    HA!

  45. Yotomoe

    BADABABADABUP!

    1. Lanval

      Is this to imply that you give a Fux?

      1. Yotomoe

        Naw, I actually own this shirt.

    2. norj

      You’re enjoying this way too much Yotomoe.

    3. AckackAck

      Dancing on the wreckage of the ship!

  46. mai876

    Well if Joshua’s not gay then what is it that his parents don’t know about him?

    1. TaintedSpud

      Answers pretty obvious.

      Serial killer.

      1. Mr. Morningstar

        Satanist?

        1. Aizat

          Cthuluist?

        2. The Candyman

          Rastafarian?

        3. Jonathan S.

          Pastafarian?

        4. AckackAck

          Dadaistfarian?

        5. xKiv

          A doctor.

        6. AgentKeen

          The Doctor?

        7. John

          Webcartoonist.

    2. Jack Finch

      In this verse he, not Jacob, is the sex addict.

  47. Lanval

    Who exactly response that sort of question in this sort of context with “I’m not ACTUALLY Gay”?

    As much as I love to pour gasoline on ships and laugh at the ensuing chaos, this implies to me he’s either Bi, uncover as a Gay person for a Christian Newspaper or else maybe is Gay but thinks Praying cured him?

    There are so many wonderful possibilities. I’m hoping for one of the left fielders because otherwise the Brown Family situation has been smoothed over too easily.

    1. timemonkey

      Or he got vibes off Ethan and was faking it to see if Ethan would respond.

      1. Lanval

        Oooh, to draw out a confession of why he’s dating Joyce? I like it.

      2. Heavensrun

        He may not have been “faking” anything. His body language seemed a -little- flirty, but that could just be his typical demeanor. However, I -do- think he picked up on Ethan’s “Hello there, little filly” and was biding his time waiting for the question.

    2. Logician

      My guess was he’s been asked a lot. Some straight people just confuse everyone’s gaydar, and eventually either get used to it or grow a beard.

      1. saltchocolate

        A beard (of any sort) won’t stop this.

    3. David

      Who exactly response that sort of question in this sort of context with “I’m not ACTUALLY Gay”?

      Well, I have a drag act. Try doing folksy music with an alto voice in straight garb, and at some point of time you’ll go tired of answering the “why are you singing like a woman” questions with “was there anything wrong with it?” or “because I can!”. Do it in drag, and you get no questions, no talkback, just a satisfied audience. Even though this is a rather straight act, no husky-voice jokes and whatever. Just multinational folklore, self-accompanied on accordion and tied together with appropriate moderation.

      Then from back at a time when I practised with a gay show choir (thought I could use it for my act until I got ousted, but more due to the established tenor primadonna conspiring against the vocal usurpator than my untypical sexual orientation) I had a male dancing partner I practised occasionally with (quite fun). I actually went to a gay workshop with him where I chose, uh, not to come in? How do you call it if you try keeping your heterosexuality discretely unmentioned?

      So I have my own share of situations where my personal sexual leanings are entirely disappointingly straight. If I don’t want to feel left out, I claim that I am a transsexual lesbian since I’m comfortable being male even though I’m into women.

  48. Rheinman

    Well that ship got Pearl Harbored. I did not expect that.

    Ethan’s dad is still totally gay, though.

    I think Joshua has converted to Judiasm and will whip out a bad ass yarmulke and jump up on the fountain ledge to sing from “Fiddler on the Roof”

    L’chaim!

  49. AgentKeen

    “I’m not actually gay, I’m bisexual.”

    …What? I have to give the shippers some hope.

    1. Casey

      My first thought also.

      1. Dara

        There’s also the possibility of his being asexual and biromantic or homoromantic.

        1. AgentKeen

          I love seeing Joyce avatars commenting on Joshua’s orientation and shipping.

    2. Mr. Morningstar

      To be honest, unless the breakup between Joyce and Ethan is completely mutual I don’t see Joshua hooking up with Ethan.

      That would be considered a dick move on Joshua’s part to hook up with his sisters boyfriend.

      1. AgentKeen

        Yeah, I totally agree with you there. I was kind of happy to see Joshua start to get protective of Joyce in the last couple of panels today.

  50. Casey

    Oh my aching shipper’s heart.
    and yet its probably for the best that Joshuthan can’t happen. Because poor Joyce if that ended up happening. Its one thing to have a gay boyfriend, its entirely different to have a gay boyfriend who’s secretly in love with your brother.

  51. Oishi1117

    Noooooooo that make’s me so so very sad. ;(

  52. Lee

    ALL I WANTED WAS ONE M/M SHIP I SWEAR TO GOD

    1. vsophi

      iktf

    2. Pier

      /sob Please don’t invoke the feels.

      1. Keroshino

        To late…they are already here!

    3. Heavensrun

      (shrug) You can always keep shipping them. One or more of the participants being straight hasn’t stopped me from shipping Joyrothy.

  53. Fuzzydaemon

    I will bet Joshua gets hit on a lot by gay men, so that might account for the “actually.” Often gay men think short goodlooking men are gay.

    I already guessed he is an atheist and agreed with Yotomoe that he is not gay. Maybe Joshua is a bi crossdresser who belongs to a free love commune.

    1. Jonathan S.

      I had a neighbor once who assumed everyone was gay. I almost had to physically assault him to get him to keep his hands off me. (I’m on the autism spectrum, and don’t take well to being touched without my permission.)

      1. vsophi

        I am gay (or something) and I would have all kinds of problems with that scenario.

        (asd person here as well)

        1. Pier

          I may be stereotyping here, but that explains the flair appeal on our fanarts. (hint hint on the word “our”)

    2. Heavensrun

      As I suggested somewhere below this, I think the “actually” is because he picked up on Ethan’s signals (or loudspeaker shouts, if you prefer) and has been waiting for the question.

  54. Jay Eff

    So! Joshua isn’t gay—-

    he’s just happy

  55. Rani

    “Heh, no, I’m not actually gay. I’m just that much of a crazy whore.”
    #OwnIt

    1. Zach

      How did I not think of this? I mean, how else could a writer really support himself?

  56. LiamAldam

    I had a weird vibe this was gonna happen.

    1. Mr. Morningstar

      Everyone felt it. But we all hopes Willis wouldn’t do it.

      We never learn our lesson.

      I don’t anyway…

  57. DiDi

    Abandon ship! Abandon ship! It’s going down!

    Every man/woman for himself/herself!!!

    1. Jonathan S.

      If it were “going down”, there wouldn’t be so many broken shipper hearts… 😉

      1. Heavensrun

        (rimshot)

    2. sumolegend

      WEEOOOWEEEOOO

  58. Doom Shepherd

    In Willis’s diary, the entry for the day this strip was written states simply:

    “Sighted Ship. Sank Same.”

    1. Drakey

      You are a beautiful person, and I think I hate you a little for it.

    2. saltchocolate

      Your grav makes that comment even more painful. Billie’s smirk…

      1. Curacaobill

        I think my gravatar would have been better.

        1. saltchocolate

          Hmmm… possibly so!

  59. Romanticide

    Sad trombone. XD XD

    1. Aizat

      http://www.sadtrombone.com/
      Enjoy.

      1. Romanticide

        thanks 😀

  60. EvergreenFir

    Is he… a … socialist? (cue violin screech)

  61. Kitsuner

    “I’m not actually gay. I’m actually Ronald Reagan reincarnated.”

    1. Spliced

      LOVE it

      1. Aizat

        Or he could be FDR.

        1. The Candyman

          Nah, Joshua is actually the Second Coming of Christ. Turns out the Mormons were right.

        2. David

          Who was the First Coming of Christ if Joshua was Second?

        3. vsophi

          The New Testament.

        4. David

          So Joshua is a Testament? Could have sworn he was a prophet.

    2. Heavensrun

      Don’t be silly. His parents would rejoice at that. Even if it -would- promote eastern religion.

      1. AckackAck

        Isn’t that Christianity is also part of Eastern religions?

        1. The Candyman

          If you want to get technical, Christianity only really started off as a distinct religion in Rome.

        2. Heavensrun

          It also depends on what you mean by the term. Everyplace is east of somewhere. (actually, technically, everyplace is east of everywhere, but that’s aside the point.)

  62. Emoroffle

    When the hell did Willis get U-boats?

    1. Aizat

      He have them from the very beginning. We just didn’t see it yet.

    2. Jack Finch

      +2 internets

  63. newllend

    And now he looked like a dick, guess we where wrong, but it only looked bad on Ethan, really really bad

  64. NightmareWarden

    What if Joshua secretly writes erotica novels? He is a “feelance writer”, he harbors shame or shyness about something, and he has intentionally kept that information away from his parents (and seemingly from his siblings). I place my money on “Joshua the Sexnerd”.

    1. Aizat

      Or Joshua the Pornomancer.

      1. Mr. Morningstar

        I am now going to use pornomancer in everyday sentences. Thank you Aizat.

        1. Aizat

          Glad I could help.

    2. Logician

      Satanic S&M porn, for maximum effect.

    3. Jonathan S.

      He’s not “actually” gay, he just writes gay porn…

  65. Synnerman

    *Ship explodes in my face*

    Aggh! The Drama! It burns! It burnnnns!

  66. Baker

    So this still begs the question, what IS/ARE Joshua’s dark secrets. Is he atheist or agnostic? What the heck could he be hiding that is so huge that he gave off the vibe that his parents would hate him if they knew more about him.

    1. Derek

      He wrote “50 Shades of Grey”. Embarrassment all around!

      1. Pier

        And his own “50 Shades of Gay”. Not bad for 2 bestseller series.

    2. Baker

      I bet if it isn’t to do with religion, it has to do with his politics. His parents are probably extremely conservative, and perhaps he is extremely liberal. That would make a lot of sense regarding his comments about his writing and being unable to be himself normally.

  67. vlademir1

    “That’s rough, buddy” — Prince Zuko

    1. Aizat

      Understatement of the year.

  68. Bill

    You know, I like this strip as much as I did “Omaha”.  They both told a great story, and the reader actually gave a damn about the characters.

    And I didn’t have to wait until one of the creators was dead before finding out about it.

  69. Jetstream

    Hey is it just me or does Ethan look kinda… weird today? Like… rounder face?

    1. Jetstream

      Wait no, that’s stupid… it’s angular… I can’t even describe what I”m seeing, he just looks off.

      1. vsophi

        Willis is not always consistent with his Ethans. Yesterday’s Ethan is personally my favorite.

        1. Ancestral Hamster

          Today’s Ethan looks like a mime.

        2. Kernanator

          “I’M A MIME!”

  70. vsophi

    Something to consider: the emphasis is on the word “not”, not “actually”.

    As in, “I’m not actually gay, I was just fucking with you because I might actually turn out to be a huge asshole”.

    /sigh. I’m actually really worried I’ll start disliking Joshua. There are a few troubling signs (and no, not because he bombed the ship I liked by being not-gay).

    1. Lanval

      I dunno, I can’t imagine someone being raised in that strict a Christian household [to the point that they won’t talk to Atheists] getting his kicks by leading on gay guys in front of his parents.

      I mean maybe if he was the rebel in the family but he’s clearly not. He also seems pretty sincere in his interactions with Ethan really; if he was doing this to be a really be a jerk, he could have gone further. Or he would have wanted to humiliate him sooner since there’s always the possibility that he’d not see him again during the trip.

      Generally, I suspect the only way that it could be a deliberate fake out would be if he was trying to bait Ethan to confess to protect Joyce, but I suspect this isn’t the case as it would invovle cunning and a lot of manipulation which would be a wierd and sudden twist of character.

      1. vsophi

        Well honestly, I don’t know how else to make sense of the way he said it.

        I wanna keep hoping, but I just don’t know…

        1. gpoy

          It could just be that he gets this a lot, so he’s not surprised Ethan assumed he was gay because a lot of people do.

    2. AckackAck

      vshophi, from the comments you posted today it seems like you just angry because your ship failed to sail properly….

      1. vsophi

        Here is a timeline of my emotions last night through today:

        – first comment, incredibly excited, and not even disappointed, strangely enough
        – posting for a while, finally feeling the disappointment
        – later on, things start to mellow out, my attention is brought to the oddity of the way he replied to Ethan
        – I start thinking about it
        – I stay on the comment section all night because it’s really easy to tab back and forth when I come up with new conclusions after thinking so hard about it
        – I stay disappointed for a while until this post happens, after which, I have started to be suspicious of Joshua and resent the ship
        – resentment of ship continues throughout the night
        – everything I post up ’til the time I go to bed aren’t super serious (though I was really excited about the relief theory I posted further down the page)
        – go to bed, resentin’ (and drawing new fanart with three all new ships)
        – wake up, get back on computer
        – reach this comment, still kind of “hmngh” about the whole thing, and now kinda just worried about Ethan

        I guess it’s because normal people don’t get this obsessive about things? I really just like analyzing fiction, that’s all, and Willis comics are perfect for it.

        1. AckackAck

          Hahaha that’s fine. At least you don’t like those Digimon anime fans…..

  71. TaintedSpud

    BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAAAAA I SO KNEW IT!

    *collects shipper tears for his tea*

    Willis you evil bastard, I freaking love you in a totally straight way.

    1. vsophi

      You mean in a not actually gay way?

  72. NF

    So by not actually gay, does that still leave the possibility he is bi? As a bi reader, I may be harboring perverse sexual lust.

    1. Jake

      ^Not sure if that is a highly appropriate gravitar, or a hilariously appropriate one.

      1. Zach

        Joe WOULD find it to be perverse.
        On the plus side he’s into that.

  73. Fezzam

    Hah! In your faces! Called it!

  74. andyy

    well FUCK.

  75. SDGlyph

    Oh man, panel 2… He says it directly to camera and everything.

    I can’t decide which is the best bit:
    1) Willis drew this strip and committed it to the buffer long before seeing the fan reaction to Josh. Man knows his readers.
    2) This conversation was scheduled to happen right on National Coming Out Day IRL.
    3) Josh turns to camera and looks directly at the shippers just as he drops the bombshell. See point 1.
    4) Josh not being gay is a bigger bombshell than him coming out.

    *slow clap*
    Well played, Willis. Well played.

    1. theKOT

      He’s even looking down a bit, as if at the comments XD

      1. Pier

        It seems intentional. Even Ethan is doing it at Panel 1, like some sort of PSA.

        1. xKiv

          Perverse sexual announcement?

      2. vsophi

        This is a totally legit interpretation, and probably more likely than the one I posted down there.

        However, if he’s not addressing the fourth wall here, mine is like, totes the right one, yo.

    2. vsophi

      Willis is kind of a (accidental?) genius.

  76. Mr. Morningstar

    HANG ON GUYS HE MAY BE BI THE SHIP MAY YET SET SAIL

    Then again even if he was I doubt he’d go with ethan due to the fact that it would likely break joyces heart.

    Nevermind ship still sunk…

    1. Keroshino

      All aboard the lifeboats…passengers must still survive!

      1. Aizat

        Meanwhile, in the Shipsinker…..

  77. somanycolors

    Goddammit Ethan.

  78. SDGlyph

    Point to note, that Josh is completely unfazed by the fact of Ethan’s orientation and jumps straight to “OK, so what’s going on?”, clearly having more experience of life outside the bubble than his parents / Joyce. Makes me wonder what battle he’s choosing to avoid, if it’s not his own orientation (assuming Willis isn’t also making a point about “straight” and “gay” not being the only available options).

    1. SDGlyph

      Also huh, I’m Mary now? Well, this is awkward.

    2. ankhtahr

      Also note his choice of words. I don’t think somebody as fundamentally christian as his parnts would say ”Why the hell”.

      1. vsophi

        I’m glad someone brought this up.

  79. Ridureyu

    Nope! Not true at all! He is definitely gay! Ethan needs to rip his clothes off right now and make him have a moment of self-realization!

    1. vsophi

      That sounds like it could get unpleasant fast.

    2. Pier

      Now that what I call “Pray the gay to stay”. 😀

    3. Curacaobill

      That would be awkward considering the members of the group on the opposite side of the fountain

  80. Drakey

    Ethan walks away, and the entire rest of DoA’s run is just him drinking to forget.

    1. AckackAck

      DoA: Drinking of Aethan.

  81. Rhy

    He could be lying.

  82. Milae

    Joshua is secretly a writer of M/M stories for a Gay male magazine. It’s why he gay-darred Ethan because of the ‘research’ he had to do when he first started writing for it.

    Anyway, now that Willis just sunk that ship without warning, I say we all move on to another ship that this series has recently made possible.

    Give me Dorothy and Joyce fun Willis, even if you must add Walky as the chocolate cream filling.

    It’s not too much to ask… you have teased your readers for ages with possibilities of lesbian relationships but every time it looks possible you cut off from them and never bring them up again as happened with the gender studies teacher and Roz’s sister or the school paper editor, or in Ruth and Billie’s case switched it off after just one kiss and turned them into AA co-coaches.

    Let me hear it shippers… JOYCExDOTTY will prevail against the odds and Willis’ mighty ship torpedo attacks where other ships flounder!

    1. vsophi

      1) Billie/Ruth is a given.
      2) Robin/Leslie is pretty much a given, though I don’t think all that much screen time will be devoted to it.
      3) Daisy is not a main character, and likely never will be.
      4) You forgot about Mandy and Grace.
      5) All the gay in this comic has been of the lesbian variety, though that’s to be expected, as most of the cast is female.
      6) Look, we just want another gay/bi/etc. guy on the cast, all right? IS THAT TOO MUCH TO ASK, WILLIS?
      7) Lesbians are pretty neato though, I approve.

      1. Heavensrun

        I don’t know that Robin/Les is a given, considering that they’re already a couple in the other continuity and Willis seems keen on exploring different areas. Also Les is in pretty much a solid mentor-type position, and you don’t usually have much cause to dig into that role’s personal life.

        1. vsophi

          Regardless, they have chemistry. Also, I agree that Leslie and Robin won’t be developed as much. They exist as functions of the other chars – no more, no less.

          Funnily enough, they’ve both been used to further Roz’s character development in large part.

        2. John

          I’ll agree that it’s not a given (though I’m hoping; nothing can be right in the ‘verse if Robin doesn’t have her lesbian), but Robin is coming from a sufficiently different place in this universe that just because it ends with Robin and Leslie getting down licky-style doesn’t mean it would be a rehash of Shortpacked.

          From what unfortunately little we’ve seen of that plot thread, it looks like it’s not so much about Robin’s sexuality (Roz seems pretty sure that Leslie/Robin is something she can make happen, and while stupid overconfidence is in-character for Roz, she’s probably got reasons for believing it… this is her sister, after all), which is been there, done that, but an exploration of hypocrisy and honesty, of standing up for what you believe rather than for what you want to get.

    2. Zach

      Chocolate? Mocha, caramel, honey, maybe carob. But NOT chocolate or vanilla.

  83. Bilfred

    Ethan in that last panel is being pretty honest, methinks.

  84. azukar

    Whadda Tweest!

  85. Tahkuya

    And yet another sunken ship, thanks Willis

  86. SplashBoogie

    I’m just gonna start shipping Ethan/Dina because at least I won’t get my hopes up

    1. Tahkuya

      you shouldn’t say it out loud or that might get sunk also

    2. Bilfred

      Faz/Billie. There’s one that will never happen.

      1. Heavensrun

        Do not court the whims of the author like that.

      2. AckackAck

        Fay/any people from DoAverse will end up with tears and dreadnaught ship.

        1. AckackAck

          Faz, not Fay, damn typo.

  87. guy

    I’m starting to get the suspicion that Ethan isn’t very good at being gay.

    1. vsophi

      2008 Robin agrees with you.

    2. AckackAck

      Ethan in early Shortpacked is also a mess. He walked away from the toy store shows him finally reach maturity.

  88. vsophi

    You know, guys, it occurred to me that Joshua’s expression in panel 2 is kind of a mirror of Ethan’s in panel 1.

    …jus’ sayin’.

    1. ankhtahr

      You’re trying anything to make this happen, don’t you?

      1. vsophi

        More like I’m constantly going back and analyzing what’s happening in the strip, making observations as I go along.

        The only conclusion I’ve really come to thus far is that Joshua reacted to that weirdly. I don’t know what it means, or if it even means anything, but there it is.

  89. scorpio1644

    Just when I thought it was about to get predictable, you throw in one hell of a twist. Well played.

  90. Milae

    Top 10 Reasons Why Joyce/Dorothy Need to Be Shipped:

    10) They actually wore matching sweater vests and under blouses for their first ‘date’.
    09) They have been thrown at each other time and again across the various universes so obviously something is begging for new context.
    08) Becoming a lesbian is so much better than dating a gay guy as a shim and will lead to a lot less heartache in the long run for everyone.
    07) It will finally take the pressure off of poor Joshua and he can finally man up to whatever it is he feels his parents would hate about him.
    06) Everyone who hates her says that Joyce needs to grow up, Dorothy made _Walky_ seem mature after getting it on with him.
    05) Joyce can remain a technical virgin before marriage as her parents / the Bible demands it (sex with another girl doesn’t require penetration – that’s just more fun).
    04) Considerring voter’s opinions of atheists in America, Joyce’s upbringing would actually benefit Dorothy’s electorial bids.
    03) Sarah’s face when she finds out that Joyce is now into girls will be hilarious if her face when she overheard a convo from a few strips back is anything to go by.
    02) Yotomoe will cry when Joyce/Dorothy ship sails instead of the Faz/Dina ship.
    01) Willis’ book cover says it all… https://pbs.twimg.com/media/BWORFi4CEAAWo-0.jpg

    1. Heavensrun

      That’s ridiculous.

      Yoto isn’t going to cry just because a ship unrelated to his crack pairing sailed.

      Also Walky and Dotty haven’t actually got it on yet.

      Finally you neglected to mention the fact that Dotty and Joyce are totes adorkable together.

    2. John

      Joyce would make an excellent First Lady.

  91. Anywhere

    NOOO YOU SANK MY [BATTLE]FANDOMSHIP.

    DAMN YOU WILLIS!!!

  92. Beachfox

    DAAAAAAAAAMN
    YOUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU
    WIIIILLIIIIIIIIIIIISSSSSSSSSSSSSSS

  93. ninja_jesus

    If Joshua is an atheist, and his parents find that out, he may well wish he were gay. At least with homosexuality there is the possibility of still believing in a god, but an outright refusal/rejection of God/Jesus Christ guarantees 0 tolerance or acceptance from any fundamentalist Christian community. As an atheist myself, I hope the best for Joshua.

    1. David

      At least with homosexuality there is the possibility of still believing in a god,
      When we are talking about fundamental Christians, that’s about par with “At least with murder there is the possibility of still believing in capital punishment”. The Old Testament (which is the main source for cherry-picking fundamental beliefs) is pretty clear in its directions of putting the offender out of his misery. I don’t quite remember whether it was just the top, though. But with regard to actual sodomy (namely involving livestock) I pretty clearly remember that both human and animal were supposed to be punished, so it’s likely the same with “lying with a man as though he were a woman”.

      Note that fundamentals tend to skip over the laws that would require them to stone gynecologists, or to lock their wives in a bathhouse at the time of their uncleanliness or whatever else.

      1. Henry

        I think what NJ was going for (please, correct me if I’m wrong) was that Joyce’s parents, although they would certainly be something like horrified if it turned out that Joshua was gay, would probably still be what they think of as supportive (even if that means doing some “pray the gay away” type-crap), because they might recognize it either as simply a sin (according to the school of thought where homosexuality is viewed as a choice), or, and this is rather unlikely, they recognize it as not being a choice. Either way, I could see the Browns as still being “we’re disappointed in you, but we love you, and we’ll help you get through this.” Not a great attitude, but still.

        Contrast this with being atheist, which there is no way they will see it as anything OTHER than a choice, as Joshua willingly rejecting everything they raised him by, and, as one of them put it, meaning he “has no moral foundation.” Contrasted with the loving, but intolerant attitude that seems likely if Joshua were to come out as gay, they would probably go nuclear if Joshua informed them that he was an atheist, given their reaction (especially Carol’s) to Joyce even associating with an atheist.

        1. ninja_jesus

          Exactly my point, thank you.

  94. Megatron

    Please be bisexual.

  95. Tarnagh

    Well, that’s disappointing. He’s not “actually” gay.

    Screw it. He’s secretly a Dom, has a dungeon in his parents basement. All those people coming over for “Bible Study” … yeah, not so much.

    1. AckackAck

      Or he start showing up with Sonic costume and fans start to avoid him…..

  96. owltawny

    DAMB YOU WILLIS!!!!

  97. Phil

    Lovin’ the evening color scheme from these last few strips.

  98. Kevin

    I am soooo glad that he isnt gay.

    1. vsophi

      Why?

      1. Aizat

        Because…..cheese.

      2. Heavensrun

        Because he wants Ethan for himself, obv.

        1. vsophi

          Sexy interpretation. I like it.

      3. Crumplepunch

        I’m glad because it rules out a cheating-on-Joyce-with-her-brother subplot.

  99. Anonymous

    Oh snap!

    A hilarious(/unfortunate?) contextual red herring.

    Yes… especially given what’s just been revealed about his relationship with his parents, his previously-given reasons for being a writer are still wholly applicable…

    This should be interesting. (!)

  100. JoeMerl

    See, I was thinking, him being gay? Too easy/obvious. Joshua’s deal is that he’s actually, like, a slightly different brand of Christian than the rest of the family. Or maybe he just went all-out and became a Satanist. Whatever.

    1. Pier

      Why not make him hard to get if Joshua being gay is “too easy” for the fan’s taste? Kinda like Billie-Ruth.

    2. Bill

      Slightly different brand of Christian?
      You mean … like maybe Roman Catholic??

      1. Jonathan S.

        I’ve known a couple of fundies. Being Roman Catholic is the next best thing to being Satanist, as far as they’re concerned.

        (They’re also not really good at the whole Bible-reading thing. They get especially annoyed when I cut off their public recitation of elaborate prayers by saying, “Matthew 6:5.”)

  101. AckackAck

    Pretty interesting. I know this is a possible plot line but it seems that a lot of people felt heartbroken when Joshua is not gay. Sinking ship by the iceberg named Willis.

    But I want to see what with Joshua’s deal. Is he an atheist? Or is he joining other branch of Christianity? Or is he fell in love with a woman with different believe? Or he convert to different religion to become Buddhist or Moslem? Don’t tell me he’s in relationship with Asma!

    1. Aizat

      Now, I’m interested on that last part.

    2. David

      In spite of what the government wants to make you believe, there are actually more justifications for privacy than being a terrorist. Perhaps he’s just not into the “ordinary children have nothing to fear” rap.

      1. David

        Hey, I got Sarah back. Cool! Do gravatars actually gravitate towards matching personalities?

        1. vsophi

          Mine is Amber, so… no.

          Wait… yes? Actually, I don’t even know. I don’t think I’m adorable enough to be Amber though.

        2. AckackAck

          I used to have Dotty as gravatar. But I’m very okay with this change.4

      2. AckackAck

        Uh…. why suddenly you mention terrorism? just because I mention Moslem?

    3. Heavensrun

      I’d bet he’s an atheist. It’d explain why he really strongly wanted to bolt when his parents were getting on Joyce about consorting with a nonbeliever.

      1. AckackAck

        Atheist is a possibility. But it’s a bit too obvious. I mean “Strict Christian parents made their children turn Atheist” is a pretty typical plot in many stories. We need something new and fresh.

      2. David

        “Atheist” does not even make sense since atheism is a conviction-based sibling to agnosticism. If you can’t make yourself believe in a god, that does not mean you are atheist. You are just a struggling theist. If you stop struggling, you are agnostic. If you tell others they are fools for struggling, you are an atheist. But Jordan is not telling others. That’s why everybody is still trying to puzzle him out.

        1. John

          I’ve got issues with your definitions of “atheist” and “agnostic”, but even accepting the dubious proposition that atheism requires evangelism… he’s not telling his family. That doesn’t mean he’s not telling anyone.

    4. Ragnal

      Thinking about it, we never really understood what Drew’s problem was with Ethan’s toy collecting and why he was such a jerk to him about it.

      My money’s on this being the same situation; we never find out what Joshua’s deal is.

      1. AckackAck

        I think with Drew it’s pretty clear. He want to see Ethan cut back on his hobbies because he felt overwhelmed with them. For Drew what he want for their future is different from what Ethan want for his future.

        Joshua…. yeah, we never know what the deal is.

  102. Tahkuya

    Glad to see there’s a few others viewing the burning wreckage of the Fail Ship Ethan/Joshua from a distance laughing maniacally as the shippers drown in tears.

    1. Aizat

      While some of them drink from the tears of those shippers. BTW, what is the taste of tears?

      1. Tahkuya

        A good question my good man shippers tears are bitterly sweat and i must say are going excellent with my taco right now

    2. AckackAck

      I don’t see this much shippers crying except the ending of the Digimon anime.

      Tbh that ending was so sudden it’s like a saboteur snuck in to the ship and C4 the engine and the hulls and detonate it when it’s almost reaching its destination.

  103. vsophi

    okokok I’m sorry I’ve made up like, a seventh of this entire comment section so far, but hear me out here:

    I’ve been mulling this revelation over in my mind for quite a bit now, and after saying it out loud several times in a variety of different ways, plus matching it with his body language, I’ve come to the conclusion that the feeling Joshua is currently expressing re: his sexuality is relief.

    When Ethan asks him if he’s gay, he does not react with disgust or irritation, as would be expected if he gets mistaken for gay often. He also does react with indifference, apathy, or confusion as would be expected if he was simply informing Ethan of his proclivities. No, he does that little laugh and self-satisfied smile to himself. He’s not even looking at Ethan while he says it. And with the emphasis on “not”, relief (or awe) is the only tone of voice that matches up with his expression.

    Maybe he was confused, maybe he’s an ex-gay, maybe he had an exception. It could be any, all, or none of these. However, this interpretation is the only one that really makes sense to me.

    1. Tahkuya

      The captain always goes down with the ship.

      1. vsophi

        Analyzing a character’s behavior and body language makes me a “captain”? I liked the pairing, but honestly, I almost want Ethan to stay away from him now, for his own sake.

        1. Leonou

          Being last on board.
          Suffering more deeply than any other crewman.
          And most importantly drawing an awesome fanart-flag for the Joshutan.
          This is what made you captain.

          …. honored to have served under your orders sir.

        2. vsophi

          …I am suddenly cool with this position.

        3. Rutee

          You’re shipping wrong if you consider the feelings of those involved! It’s all about you!

          This has been a humorous joke.

    2. vsophi

      does not* react with indifference

      whoopsie, that kinda changed the whole argument there for a sec

    3. Heavensrun

      Actually, I think that “not actually gay” is mostly to do with the fact that he knows that Ethan thinks he’s gay, and has been blatantly sending signals to him, and has consequently been waiting for Ethan to ask.

      1. vsophi

        I was originally inclined to agree, but there are two things that still seem off in that scenario:

        1) It makes Joshua look like kind of a dick. I mean, c’mon, he looks amused by the (alleged) mistake. Also, if he realized it early on, he shouldn’t have encouraged Ethan’s advances. All he had to do was cut it off after the introduction. One could argue he did just that (albeit a little late), but he clearly decided to bail for a different reason.

        2) It’s still pretty weird how he’s not making eye contact with Ethan. There are two ways to explain this: either he’s talking to the readers, or something’s being concealed. I concede the former is more likely, but I think it’d be pretty interesting if it was indeed the latter.

        1. Heavensrun

          1) I disagree. If you reread the previous scene, he’s initially just answering Ethan’s questions and conversing normally. You can pretty much see the point at which he realized what was happening, at which point he immediately stopped chatting and left. And throughout the whole thing, the instant he was -sure- Ethan was gay, he immediately went the “what are you doing to my little sister??” direction.

          2) I seriously doubt anybody is “talking to the readers”. Ethan’s avoiding eye contact either because he’s checking to see if anybody’s looking their way, or just because he’s putting himself out there and is intimidated by the prospect. Joshua’s glance away indicates that he’s thinking about something else when he says it. It could be he’s lying, because “WTF I’m not going to sit here while my sister’s boyfriend hits on me, what’s wrong with you???”, or it could be because he’s thinking about what he’s -actually- hiding from his parents. (Hell, it might even be an “If only…” kind of expression. If he’s an atheist, as I suspect, he might well be thinking about how much easier it’d be to come out to his parents if he was gay instead.)

        2. Pier

          2) I came up with the PSA conclusion because this has happened before. A lot of fans were asking for confirmation on Ethan’s sexuality, so much that he has made a separate post about it. This post with the characters staring at the audience, maybe, is his way of saying Joshua’s not gay.

        3. vsophi

          1) How exactly did you come to that conclusion? His mind is clearly elsewhere when he’s talking to Ethan there. I’m not sure how you can dispute this, especially since he himself doubts his ability to show restraint about this kind of thing in the last strip: “Might say some stuff I can’t ever take back.”

          2) a. Haven’t you ever heard of Aside Glances? Mindfully employing tropes is certainly not beyond Willis.

          b. Ethan’s obviously doing that sort of awkward, casual, aloof thing when you’re trying to act like you aren’t particularly interested in the answer, but you secretly are. You do have a point about Joshua; he could be thinking of his actual secret there. However, it still does not fit the way he responded to Ethan’s question. Try saying it out loud a few times: there are only a couple ways it really sounds natural with the word “not” stressed here.

          If things had played out differently, we would probably be of the same opinion. However, given the sequence of events being what they are, his reaction to Ethan’s advances just does not seem realistic.

        4. Heavensrun

          1) I don’t see what that has to do with the claim that Ethan led Joshua on, which is what I was talking about there. In the first scene, I think he was just being friendly, until panal 5 of this comic:

          http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/04-just-hangin-out-with-my-family/freelance/

          At which point he immediately excused himself, and was guarded and slightly accusatory when Ethan approached him here:

          http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/04-just-hangin-out-with-my-family/heated/

          The line you’re quoting is about not wanting to get involved in the argument between his parents and his sister, because -whatever- his secret is, he’s afraid he’ll give it out if he confronts them. (which is part of what makes me think it relates to belief, rather than sexuality)

          2) I have heard of aside glances. But the whole joke on an aside glance is that it’s an obvious breach of the 4th wall, and that isn’t so obvious here. Also, there are perfectly reasonable in-universe reasons for them to be avoiding eye contact, namely that Ethan is risking outing himself, and Joshua is aware of Ethan’s interest and the problems that it represents. If they were -both- eyeing the content section, or if they both paused to look at the camera, I might be more inclined to believe that’s what’s going on, but Ethan’s looking off to the left(presumably the direction of Joyce and the ‘rents…) and Joshua is looking down and away from Ethan. (avoiding eye contact in an awkward situation)

          As far as the line, I think it works perfectly well if he knows that Ethan -thinks- he’s gay, and I honestly don’t see -any- reactions to Ethan’s advances. He answered some questions about what he does and why, realized something was amiss, left, came back later, was cagey and evasive until Ethan -asked- if he was gay, and in so asking outed himself. At which point Joshua confronted him. That makes complete sense to me in the context we’ve been given.

        5. vsophi

          1) I was responding to the claim that Joshua left, “the point at which he realized what was happening”. When he leaves, he is clearly not thinking about Ethan. He is “cagey and guarded” because he’s trying to avoid his parents.

          2) Here’s the thing: it’s weird that Joshua’s apparently “cagey and guarded” in his first interactions, then spontaneously pleasant/satisfied. If I were in his situation, after realizing Ethan is gay (and dating my sister), I’d respond in decidedly more unpleasant way (with irritation, most likely). It makes more sense that after Ethan makes his inquiry, he connects the dots somewhere between panel 2 and panel 4, which leads to his negative mood.

        6. Heavensrun

          Man. I feel like we read completely different comics.

        7. vsophi

          So you’re through discussing it? I:

    4. nick

      I would guess confused. He did have that moment of doubt here (http://www.dumbingofage.com/2013/comic/book-3/04-just-hangin-out-with-my-family/freelance/), and seeing more of the Browns being dicks adds more meaning to his other scentences in that strip

      1. nick

        I forgot to add that he may just be protecting Joyce’s relationship; Joshua doesn’t want to hurt Joyce by dating her ex-boyfriend.

    5. Alex Stritar

      Maybe he just gets it a lot.

      1. vsophi

        People don’t tend to respond so genially to something they hear a lot.

  104. Pier

    What I hate the most is that Panels 1 and 2 feel like they are actually facing the audience while delivering their lines like some PSA to rub it in our face.

  105. nalem

    OH SHIT

    THE JIG IS UP

    RUN, JOSHUA, RUN

    1. Heavensrun

      Joshua? Ethan’s the one in trouble here.

  106. Martin Smith

    So if he’s not gay, what’s his big secret? Is he a Satanist on the sly?

    1. Alex Stritar

      Well, he said not exactly gay, so he could be bi, pan or trans.

  107. Aj Hedgehog

    I think what is important to take away from this is that Joshua just blasphemed, this is truly why he is the black sheep of the family

    1. Kernanator

      What, no, Joshua’s the favorite (because they know the least about him). Jordan’s the most likely black sheep of the family.

  108. vsophi

    oh god guys, you know what
    ethan danned it
    he danned it good

    1. Kernanator

      Oh wow, you’re right.

  109. TheReen

    Maybe he’s a sex addict? That might explain the ‘not actually gay’ comment.

  110. SHAZAM

    DAMN YOU WILLIS

    1. Leonou

      Damn! Damn! Damn! Curse you until the thirteenth generation

  111. ATN

    SWERVE!

  112. Tenn

    Congratulations to those who called it, and my condolences to those who are disappointed.

  113. Nameless

    Damn you, Willis!

  114. ProfNekko

    torpedo to the starboard bow, and this ship is sunk

  115. Jason

    I’m thinking atheist

    1. David

      Catholic altar boy would probably be more horrifying to his parents.

    2. AckackAck

      Too obvious, need a more interesting twist.

  116. hof1991

    At the end of today, Joshua is headed back to his adult life and Ethan is still a confused 18 year old. It may take decades for us to even see Joshua again. It’s not like older brothers drop in on their younger siblings all the time and parent’s day has lasted for months. He is a plot device fully installed and waiting to be used later. And ‘not actually gay’ is sufficiently ambiguous to mean all kinds of things, ex-gay included.

    But Joshua is being the adult in the area and making it clear that dating his sister while gay is not OK and can only end badly.

    Still waiting for Naomi to notice this little private conversation.

    1. vsophi

      imagine naomi seeing them together and making a big stink about it, accusing joshua of trying to seduce her son in earshot of just about everybody

  117. LordHaw

    I can see why so many shipped this one. It does almost seem like Joshua was playing Ethan a bit. But one does wonder what Joshua’s secrets are.

    I kind of like some people shipping Joyce/Dorothy…but can you imagine the freaking out Joyce would do realizing she was into girls?? She’d be a wreck!

    1. vsophi

      The DoA fandom lives for wrecks. How else could we stand the unbearable torment that is the very foundation upon which rests a Willis™ brand creation?

      1. LordHaw

        I am starting to realize this 🙂 I’m fairly new to DoA and the rest of the Willisverse. I must say though seeing Joyce dealing with THAT revelation about herself would be entertaining.

  118. clodia

    HA

  119. Alexis

    “I’m bisexual!”
    We all know how to hide secrets by being TECHNICAL, JOSHUA, you’re not the FIRST to pull this trick on everyone.
    Nobody ever asks if you’re bi.

    1. vsophi

      Come to think of it, the way he phrased it (and presumably “toned” it), could indicate that people tend to think he’s gay because he’s bi (checks out dudes, may be dating one, etc.).

      1. Foxhack

        I used to get asked if I was gay all the time. Despite having a girlfriend.

        I just say “I like girls way too much to be gay.” If people are too dense to understand what I mean by that then eh.

    2. ConstantComment

      Joshua seems like a decent guy who can totally read the situation with Ethan. I think he wants to shut that crush down in a kind, but firm way. So if he is dating a guy, he would probably just clear that up.

  120. Kiggy

    Nice curve ball Willis

  121. Leonou

    And yes, all the Browns children have giant blue eyes. It HAS to be a dominant trait.
    not so sure about the glasses though.

    1. AckackAck

      But the triangle smile is exclusively Joyce?

  122. PokeyPuppy

    A MILLION times better than a ship for these two. I friggin’ love this comic so much.

  123. The Candyman

    I want to damn Willis, but my desire to high five him is much too great.

    This is how the master does it, people.

    1. saltchocolate

      Not mutually exclusive desires. Watch:

      DAMN YOU, WILLIS!
      :::sigh:::
      High five, dude.

      1. Leonou

        High DAMN-FVE, you WILLIS-DUDE !

        1. saltchocolate

          Nachitos for you, Leonou!

  124. Lel

    After this concludes, and Ethan walks away with his opinion on his relationship changed, Joshua pulls off his mask.
    He was Mike all along.

    1. The Candyman

      “Mike? What the hell did you do with Joshua?”
      “There is no Joshua, dilweed. I’ve been riding this out for over 20 years.”

      1. Whittier

        You win the internet.

      2. AckackAck

        We really need to create a new trope called Mike Gambit.

        1. vsophi

          Someone who goes RIDICULOUSLY far out of their way to make people suffer?

          Sounds like a trope if I’ve ever heard one!

  125. Philip Petrunak

    So… why is everything tinted purple? Is it because of the sunset?

    1. Kernanator

      Yes.

    2. AckackAck

      In that universe there’s microbes in the stratosphere that will change the colour of sunrays randomly.

  126. fintikisniko

    Do u think David reads the comments just to pick the outcome that will upset the most people

    1. vsophi

      He can’t: buffer.

      1. The Candyman

        The way he predicted all this would happen months before has led me to believe that Willis is actually a prophet. Who of course uses his powers to troll people with comics.

        1. saltchocolate

          Not a prophet — a fabulous storyteller. We are just picking up on the clues he leaves us in the strip. Some turn out to be foreshadowing, and some — DAMN YOU, WILLIS! — turn out to be nothing but teasers. Either way, he is a puppetmaster, pulling our little strings with his mighty pen (or computer graphics program, or whatever).

  127. Mort

    woah, That’s a bit unexpected

  128. TsunamiJane

    I like how Joshua is not surprised or offended by Ethan’s assumption he was gay. He must get that a lot.

  129. AHR

    He could be bisexual. Or pansexual. Or demisexual. Or asexual. THERE ARE POSSIBILITIES DAGNABBIT.

    1. xKiv

      He could be sexualhandgranat.

  130. Whittier

    Bah. Well, then, his big secret is either that he’s bisexual or he’s an atheist.

    1. vsophi

      Or he’s some other heathen religion. Or he does porn. Premarital hanky panky. Polyamory. Democrat and/or liberal. Communist. Libertarian. Serial killer. Furry. Otherkin. Trans. Alcoholic. Stoner. Sex addict*. Interracial dating. Man-child. Drag queen and/or transvestite. Genderqueer.

      There are a bunch of things out there that bigots like the Browns would disapprove of.

      *i am slightly on-board with shipping jacob and joshua

      1. LordHaw

        I love that phrase: “Premarital hanky panky”! Ever since Joyce first said it, I’ve loved it!

      2. The Candyman

        Due to a lack of evidence otherwise, I am forced to assume Joshua is all of these at once.

        1. Sam

          That’s not how evidence works yet it is hilarious.

          YOU HAVE GIVEN ME COGNITIVE DISSONANCE. HOW DARE YOU CANDYMAN. NEXT YOU’LL TELL ME CHOCOLATE IS MADE OF SQUIRRELS.

        2. David

          Only nut chocolate.

      3. ender1200

        D&D player.

    2. AckackAck

      Probably, but being atheist is a tad bit too typical in many stories and webcomics. I wish Willis to surprise us with something more creative. Interesting list vsophi made there.

  131. Nym

    Hahaha, second panel Joshua is staring right through the fourth wall at all of us.

  132. Henry

    Buuuustedd!

  133. Galatine

    Joshua’s big secret is probably that he’s a liberal.

    1. LordHaw

      perhaps it’s because I’m Canadian, that phrase doesn’t register much “OMG!” value with me. Despite my parents being fairly religious, their politics were left wing.

    2. xKiv

      Joshua has big secret allright – just not for Ethan!

  134. Henry

    Also, we now have proof that Joshua’s gaydar is likely the most effective in the family, since Joyce didn’t know Ethan was until he told her, and her parents don’t seem to have picked up on it.

    Also, after somebody pointed out that Joshua being gay was way too obvious in the comments for the previous strip, I would have been more surprised if he’d turned out to be gay.

    1. David

      Well, regarding possible plot twists, you are all aware that
      a) David Willis reads the comments
      b) Jeph Jacques links to “Dumbing of Age” under a different name.
      He can just play this like reverse cheated Battleships, placing his bombs wherever there is place between the multitude of ships.

      1. David Willis

        I read the comments on strips I finished nine weeks ago.

        1. David

          But the shipyards have been around for longer than nine weeks. Bouncing bombs took much longer to develop than the actual attacks lasted.

      2. fudo81

        Come on people, seriously? Willis even posts sneak peeks of newer strips on tumblr, what else should he do to convince you that comments are irrelevant to current storylines?

        1. fudo81

          *future strips

  135. Foxhack

    You know, he could be bisexual. 😛

  136. Trolldrool

    Maybe he’s a sperm donor. I doubt his parents would be very happy to learn that.

  137. ninja_jesus

    David Willis set you all up. He gave you the materials you needed to build your ships just so he can sink it. You’ve been had, shippers. Gloriously, gloriously had.

    All praise Willis.

    1. David

      Can a story have millihelens? Oh, for those unaccustomed to the unit: a millihelen is the amount of beauty required to launch one ship.

      1. saltchocolate

        Thank you for this. I’ve needed this word all my life, though I didn’t know it.

      2. Blue

        What is the millihelen from? It sounds familiar but I can’t place it. (I want to say Uglies series though…)

  138. Jason

    I still think Joshua may be gay or bi- he and Ethan really did seem to have chemistry when they met- but that he’s steering way clear out of concern for Joyce.
    But we will see!

  139. The Candyman

    I can now declare this the biggest shipwreck since Luke/Leia.

    1. AckackAck

      Luke/Leia is not a shipwreck. It’s simply a lot of people jumped out from the ship because “ew ew gross gross!” and only a few people stay aboard….

      1. norj

        If the amount of Star Wars incest porn I unfortunately keep on stumbling across is any indication its more than a few.

      2. Bill

        Not saying that I approve of it (the Star Wars porn, that is), but there was a fair amount of time that passed between Luke first seeing her hologram in Episode IV and when he first learns of his sister in Episode V — so there was ample opportunity for such hanky-panky while the two were still blithely ignorant of their relationship.

  140. No_One

    Why does everyone ignore the fact he could still be bi. Bi people exist you know…

  141. Stifyn Baker

    I really feel for Ethan in this one; his experience is much like my own (except he’s having a slightly easier ride). College is a confusing time, especially if you’ve been brought up in a ‘gay = evil’ culture. Consequently, my response to Joshua’s question would have been (and often was) deny, deny, deny. I’m much happier in my own skin now.

    1. Oxyvolt

      My way of denying my homosexuality was thinking that I was bisexual, but once I stopped lying to myself, I did feel much better in general. But coming out to other people IRL is still nearly impossible, except my mom (with which I’m very close), whose reaction was formidable. So I can understand why Joshua would deny being gay, especially if he’s still confused about himself like I was.

      1. Oxyvolt

        Ethan gravatar. How convienient.

      2. Stifyn Baker

        I am bi, I spent years pretending I was straight. I have a wife now who has helped me enormously to come to terms with who I really am. I still can’t believe some days that she’s ok with it. I’m still not (officially) out to a whole bunch of family… although since I did share with my sister, I guess they probably all know anyway. That said, if they did know they wouldn’t let on, because of that whole intolerance thing the Welsh do so well (seriously, we have the most racist, homophobic, insular culture on Earth). It’s a real ‘don’t ask, don’t tell’ situation.

        …I’m 43, fergodsake. You’d have thought I’d have my life sorted out by now…

  142. JayeRyane

    His exact words are “I’m not ACTUALLY gay.” Which to mean seems like he’s been asked it a lot before … which means … he might in fact be bisexual. Because even people in the LGBT community seem to disregard the B a LOT.

  143. RandomAvatard

    People still draw Katara/Zuko ship art. You can have your Ethan/Joshua.

  144. The kid

    Well that’s on Ship down…better start building a new one.

    1. AckackAck

      From the comment section some people still trying to patch the ship and bucket brigade the water out….

  145. Fen_Star

    Nooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo… … … ooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!!

    If you must destroy this, I demand more AmberxMike in shortpacked!

    1. AckackAck

      We got enough of AmberXMike. We need a brand new one, Dina with someone…..

      1. Mr K

        Faz says hello

        1. AckackAck

          I can see everyone will set sail trying to sink that XD

        2. James

          Damn Stright

          The USS SALFAZ will see to it!!

        3. Fen_Star

          Faz may be shipped only if by “ship” you mean a solid block of steel reenforced concrete.

  146. FuryOfFirestorm

    Sure, Joshua. There’s no reason at all for you to deny it…at all.

    Everybody remember that when a guy denies being gay, he’s totally telling the truth. Just ask Ricky Martin, Clay Aiken, Wentworth Miller, Matt Bomer, Jodie Foster, Anderson Cooper, Liberace…

    1. David

      I’m shocked, shocked. When did Jodie Foster come out as a guy?

      1. FuryOfFirestorm

        January 16, 1979

        1. David

          As a guy? Hardly.

  147. davidbreslin101

    Ethan’s first line: nice mid-sentence font-size-change.

  148. Vanessa

    Whew! I read through all the comments! I only have time to do this occasionally, but it’s fun. You guys are amusing and mostly pretty nice! Whoever moderates this does a good job and it must be very time consuming. But it does increase my enjoyment of the comics even though I usually just read quickly through a random selection.

    Willis, people do read stuff! Just not all the stuff all the time.

    Btw, awesome story line.

    1. vsophi

      Willis moderates, and as far as I can tell, he doesn’t actually have to step in all that often. We’re just that awesome.

      1. norj

        Or he’s just that lazy.

        1. Fen_Star

          Can’t it be both?

  149. Ender

    Joshua is so in the closet he’s in Narnia.

    1. saltchocolate

      20 internets and all the seltzer running down the screen of my computer! That comment is enshrined in my heart.

  150. Trolldrool

    To be honest, I actually hope Joshua is neither homo- or bi- or pan-sexual. Because if he’s either of those, his entire role in the comic will just be reduced to “That guy that should totally hook up with Ethan.” Nothing about his freelance occupation will be of interest, nothing about his personality. Only whether or not he’s a suitable match for Ethan.

    1. Alex Stritar

      Would trans be fine?

      1. Trolldrool

        I want to say no on principle, but somehow that actually sounds more interesting as it’s not strictly a matter of sexual attraction. Or maybe it’s just because my nephew is trans and I’m being hypocritical.

      2. andiemus

        I don’t see him becoming a major long-term character, so to have a person who’s a closet transexual just to disappear in like 7 strips would be really pointless.

    2. AckackAck

      I think I’m going to agree with it. Maybe because I read too much webcomic but I think too much webcomic writer depend on “cute guy and cute guy relationship” to ensnare new readers (mostly female) in.

      So far Willis able to expand the story well. We have domestic violence problem (Amber’s parents), Extreme religion parenting (Joyce’s parents), Abandonment Issue (Amber’s mother), Super Ego (Danny), delusion (Danny and Amber relationship) and many more.

      1. David Willis

        Man, I hope you’re equally aggravated by all of the cute guy and cute girl relationships used to ensnare new readers!

        1. AckackAck

          Well, I’m still raging about Danny-Amber relationship, so it’s an equal balance on both sides.

        2. David Willis

          Unless you’re raging about Danny-Amber for the same reason, then I don’t see why that is relevant to my questioning. Hating a single hetero relationship does not give “equal balance” in any way, shape or form to dismissing all gay relationships as artificial readership ploys.

        3. ninja_jesus

          In essence, everything is a readership ploy because IT’S A FRIGGIN STORY AND PEOPLE SHOULD BE INTERESTED IN IT.

        4. Lel

          The fact that you have a webcomic is a ploy to gain readers. If you really had artistic integrity, Willis, your comics would be engraved in the center of an ancient, trap-filled temple to make sure only the most worthy would read.

          We’d send a new reader down every equinox, lest the gods become angry.

      2. vsophi

        So… Ethan shouldn’t ever have a boyfriend because it’d just be pandering to the fans? Because I mean, there aren’t any other gay/bi/pan guys on the cast, so unless Willis introduces another one (could’ve been Josh), there is no way he will ever get laid or end up with someone (assuming Joyce ends their repression tango).

        Also, your apparent aversion to romance subplots is bizarre to me. This is college for gods’ sakes, romance and sexy drama is part and parcel.

        1. Viktoria

          Mike is bi(or something). And IIRC Jacob had gay experiences in Shortpacked!. Faz did too, repeatedly.

        2. vsophi

          Mike’s a side character, and he’ll likely stay that way. And in any event, both of his Walkyverse relationships were incredibly unhealthy. Jacob has had no same-sex experiences as far as we’ve seen. Faz is obviously not a main character, and he is also incredibly creepy and gross.

        3. AckackAck

          No, I’m talking about building the character first before we can judge into a new pair even when one of them (Joshua) character is still too vague.

      3. BrotherFlounder

        Right, because gay characters in fiction are put in relationships and dramatic situations solely for ratings stunts and to attract readers. Not because it’s a reflection of the real world at all. Also it’s apparently a bad thing to try and attract viewpoints other than some narrow definition that the author has no way of knowing other than random comments.

        you are not nice

        1. AckackAck

          The problem with Ethan – Joshua ship is that Joshua himself is a pretty recent character newly introduced to the story and he already received his own title and sexual preference by the readers from the beginning and they are hoping that the writer will follow up with their demand. The problem is this kind of plot is pretty common in many stories it became a tired trope. I was worried Willis will fall into it.

          So I’m being nice, I mean look at Ethan in Shortpacked. He had to go through a lot with his former BF and it even doesn’t end well for both of them. And yet he learned to steel through a lot of life problems and end up triumphant in the end.

        2. David Willis

          Editor’s note: “you are not nice” is what I substituted for the language originally present in the post since talking like that to other people on the board is not exactly allowed. It is a very loose paraphrase.

          Also, you have yet to explain yourself. You just keep on saying stuff like “tired trope” and “pretty common,” but not really saying what these things are or why they’re specifically tied into homosexual relationships.

          But if we really want to get into”tired tropes,” I’ve been writing gay folks in comics for around a decade, and if I had a dollar for every time I was told something about how “adding gay folks to stories is pandering” any time there is even a whiff of a potential gay person or a gay relationship, I’d be able to take the ads off the page because I am already living in a mansion on the moon.

        3. Fen_Star

          I don’t think the problem is that it is a gay couple, just that if Joshua isn’t gay they won’t be a couple.
          For example: If Joshua was straight and Ethan’s brother, then they would hope he would be gay so he doesn’t hook up with Joyce.
          Or I may misunderstand?

    3. Fen_Star

      So, he can’t hook up with Ethan, because too many people are shipping them? Or are you saying he doesn’t have enough personality to be anything other than Ethan’s boyfriend? Or am I misunderstanding entirely?

  151. Charles Phipps

    I’m sad. I want him *AND* Jacob to be gay.

    1. AckackAck

      There’s always slash fictions…..

      1. Arturo

        And there always will be.

    2. vsophi

      Do not fear, Charles: Joshob will rise.

  152. Plasma Mongoose

    Ethan: “I knew I shouldn’t have hid in this glass closet!”

  153. Pier

    Make this strip the new 666-comments strip.

    1. Pier

      60 more and we will tore open a portal that will sink the ship in reverse 😀

      1. norj

        SO you plan on summoning the elder gods?

        1. Pier

          Just one final touch to seal the deal 😀

        2. Pier

          AND STOP! See you on the other side fellas 🙂

  154. Maycroft

    “According to the Elder Brother code, I’m allowed to bet you up”

    1. AckackAck

      “I bet you 100 bucks you can come out of the closet in front of them RIGHT NOW!”

  155. Michael

    Yarrr! Comon’, laddies, we shall plunder tha’ treasure ships o’ this ship’ogold! YAARR!

  156. jackson

    Oh thank God, because Joyce been through some shit that even had me wondering if willis had some terrible dramatic experience with upbeat blondes that kept making him having awful shit happen to her. Oh and as far as joshua is concerned, don’t even think he’s bi. More likely a secret atheist or agnostic, considering how he left when his family was praying over joyce.

    1. vsophi

      He left in the middle of his conversation with Ethan. He TRIED to leave during the prayer session, but any decent person would feel uncomfortable around that.

    2. Trolldrool

      He could be Hindu too, you know. Or Buddhist.

  157. Charles Phipps

    I’m hoping instead of atheism, Joshua is secretly a web cartoonist.

    🙂

    1. AckackAck

      Then the Scooby gang will catch Joshua in the act and rip open his map to reveal… Willis!

  158. AckackAck

    Okay I just predicting something from the last panel:

    Joshua probably got anger issue. Probably violent anger issue. I can see him trying to beat up Ethan in the next comic because of his relationship with Joyce. Maybe because he got so much bottled up inside he’s like a volcano ready to explode.

    This prediction is brought to you by Damn You Willis Foundation.

  159. razama

    Joshua: “The truth is… I just love the Wii U so much… why don’t people understand what a good system it is..?”
    Ethan: “Good god man… .”

    1. AckackAck

      What’s wrong with you Joshua!? You know PC Master race is still a way to go!

  160. norj

    666 comments now we summon the devourer of souls, the drinker of sorrow, let all who read this web-comic despair.

    1. Pier

      SACRIFICE THE NON-BELIEVER NAMED YOTOMOE!!

  161. Red Comet

    I know I know, all the *feels*. But the main thing I’m thinking with this panel is how good Ethan’s new hair looks at this particular moment.

  162. GoogerGeiger

    Well THAT escalated quickly! How did Jordan manage to figure that out so blatantly?

    1. vsophi

      New theory: Joshua and Jordan are twins and did a little switcheroo for Freshman Family Weekend. The reason everyone keeps confusing them is because Willis is subliminally broadcasting the truth into their subconscious.

    2. timemonkey

      EVERYONE can tell that Ethan is gay by spending a few minutes with him. It was a bit of a running joke a while back.

  163. vsophi

    Also, unrelated, but calling Jordan being a social justice activist.

    1. Volkai

      I could see Jordan as a social justice activist…

      …but I suspect the thing that has him acting as he is, would probably be either religious or political differences.

      1. vsophi

        …see response to GoogerGeiger above.

  164. Volkai

    . . . So he’s bi?

    (This is a joke. Mostly.)

  165. Rutee

    Oh Ethan, when will you learn? Never let secrets out. Control what people know. Learn from Mallory Archer – that’s surely the key to a healthy life.

    1. tahrey

      Nah, Josh just seems to have uncannily good gaydar.

  166. Brando

    Wait … what?

  167. Maki P

    DAMN YOU WILLIS!!

  168. Leesai

    Betcha he’s athiest. Calling it now.

  169. tahrey

    Panel 5: GPOmostofmyinteractionswithactualhumans

  170. tahrey

    Wait … is his name seriously Jocelyne?

    1. Chronos

      All you need to know about the Crying Game…

  171. DarkoNeko

    …wait, he’s not ?

  172. Makenzie

    I swear, every day I wake up and wish I knew more about Jocelyne. Even just how what she says relates to how she thinks about herself- does “heh, no, I’m NOT actually gay” mean “I like girls but am pretending to be a boy, so that makes me straight for the purposes of this conversation and a lesbian in reality”, or “I like boys but since I’m a girl I’m actually straight”, or “I’m bisexual lol”, or “I’m asexual”, or…

    1. SwanBlossom

      She probably likes guys, judging by most of her reactions to Ethan.

  173. Aisling

    DAMN YOU WILLIS! lol

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