179

Liberals
Posted on April 11, 2012 by David M Willis

179 thoughts on “Liberals”

  1. Sensedog

    And thus, Joyce learns to understand Mike.

    1. Undrave

      He’s NEVER on anyone’s side. Except your mom’s.

      1. Insomniac

        Your mom’s INside.

        1. Blob Marley

          Nickel, penis, faaace, femurs, psl, THIS PLEASES GALASSO

        2. Jackson

          Babies McIntyre?

        3. PrincessCarlos

          Babies McItyre.

        4. Mally

          (and subs)

      2. wererat

        he’s on any side you don’t WANT him on, baby.

  2. Jen Aside

    NO ONE KNOWS, Joyce.

    1. Jacob

      But everyone knows which side he’s on. He’s on the side that you don’t want him to be on.

  3. Yotomoe

    Oh Joyce…NEVER assume Mike is on your side.

    1. Björn

      …or that he does not have ninjas at his disposal! (Sorry, couldn’t resist.)

      1. Flushmaster

        Mike doesn’t need ninjas. He can just throw dead people at his foes.

  4. Wonder Wig

    You’ll never know till the end Joyce. Mike is Snape.

    1. Rikushadow5

      He killed Dumbledore?

      1. Paul

        No, he’s played by Alan Rickman.

        1. Kernanator

          You’re both wrong. He teaches Potions and hates Harry Potter.

        2. Valdrax

          Not in a lot of the fics I’ve heard about…

        3. Bickendan

          Your AV suggests you’ve read a few.

        4. RandomWebcomicsJunkie

          So does yours, Bickendan.

        5. Blob Marley

          Turnabout is fair play, sir!

        6. Broggly

          http://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_detailpage&v=R2z5BoOuDI0#t=27s
          Potter you fool!

        7. Wonder Wig

          Imagine Rickman as Snape reading Mike’s lines from the last panel as he looms over his morning newspaper and begins to smile with prospect.

        8. Nim

          I had to scroll up and re-read Mike’s lines in Rickman’s voice.

          It made my day. I’ll be grinning like a maniac at work…

        9. ChompMonsta

          Haha YYEESS.

        10. Historyman68

          Mike would TOTALLY be played by Alan Rickman.

          Or… who else? I feel like there has to be one actor a little closer to Mike’s age who would be perfect for him.

        11. David

          Fifteen years ago, I woulda said Matt Damon.

        12. Sensedog

          That would work. And possibly Mark Wahlberg, also minus about fifteen years.

        13. iSaidCandleja-

          Mark Wahlber in The Big Hit seems almost perfect to me. Except that character couldn’t stand it when someone disliked him. But other than that, and a voice not quite deep enough, he is the Mike I imagine.

        14. Historyman68

          Whoa. That’s actually kind of perfect.

        15. Pagannerd

          Mcauley Culkins’ brother. The one who played Wallace in the naff Scott Pilgrim adaptation. (Seriously, he was one of the few bright lights in that very dreary film.

        16. Pagannerd

          Arrgh I forgot to close the parentheses. I am filled with shame.

        17. Shippy McShipper

          Here.)

        18. shoeboxjeddy

          Scott Pilgrim described as “naff” and “dreary”? You’re on the list sir or madam. THE LIST

        19. Historyman68

          WHOA. He’s totally the other guy I was thinking of when I posted that. Though I also disagree that that movie was dreary, but I preferred the comic overall. I think.

        20. Jen Aside

          Kieran Culkin?

        21. ChompMonsta

          Oh, definitely! But seriously folks, more like Jamie and less like Casey. What an abomination.

  5. sockv

    Mike is awesome.

    1. GrateScott

      I’ve always thought so, in all his incarnations.

      1. Druid

        Well he did kind of win the World of Willis. He’s the only character who survived and has been a significant character in every one of his most expansive and epic comics (It’s Walky, DoA, and Shortpacked). Only failing to make a real impact in Roomies and Joyce and Walky.

        1. Historyman68

          I’d say kind of Robin, but she hasn’t had as big a part in DoA… yet.

        2. Blob Marley

          She’s had a big impact. It’s just been off-screen. I mean, come on. She’s a friggin CONGRESSWOMAN.

        3. Aydr

          meh. She’s was congresswoman in Shortpacked! too. And in that one she also has superpowers and helped save the world.

          Also she managed to work at a toy store while in office and campaigning.

  6. Doctor_Who

    Mike is on Mike’s side. And even then, only barely.

    1. Yotomoe

      Mike only trusts Mike as far as he can throw him. And let’s be honest, Mike isn’t very trustworthy

      1. Kelly

        And he isn’t super-powered in this one.

        1. Fred

          Yet.

        2. Aydr

          Or is he?

  7. Tifanimi

    Oh god…I’m kind of thinking they should date now or at least hang out more…he might be good for her.

    Oh god.

    1. Yotomoe

      In the same way burning your hand on the stove is a good way to learn to avoid fire.

      1. George

        Except Mike is more like sticking that hand into the sun and setting off a nuke. If he realizes he’s doing something good for someone, he’ll just do the opposite of that. For example, if he were to convoke Joyce to aspire to being more than a housewife and accept that women are supposed to be an equal part of society now, he’d have to either crush those dreams so thoroughly that she ended up back where she started plus a few mental scars in order to still be Mike. Unless, of course, she shows an Amber-like jerk tolerance, in which case he will fall in love and oh god that is horrifying why did I type that.

        1. Shippy McShipper

          I just want to point out that, if you already stuck your hand into the sun, a nuke or a few thousand are not going to matter at all.
          It’s kinda like walking into the sea and bringing a glass of water.
          Only more so.

        2. Merlanthe

          Am pretty sure Joyce already displayed an ‘Amber-like jerk tolerance’ throughout Its Walky. In which case that would mean that throughout Shortpacked Amber has been displaying a Joyce-like jerk tolerance…now im confused :S

    2. TsunamiJane

      This strip totally made me ship them. You’re not alone. It’s the way they’re making eye contact.

      1. Merlanthe

        I had already started quietly shipping them before this. Ever since Mike showed up as Joyces chaperone in fact.

        He has yet to exert as much if any effort on making her existence miserable or crushing her hopes and dreams the way he does with everyone else. Also his expression seems less frowny on the few occasions that he is looking at Joyce.

        Plus he may just be tagging along to gender studies to inflict misery upon Walky and Dorothy but he is also hanging out with Joyce quite amicably for Mike. Same thing kinda goes with the church later on.

  8. Mkvenner

    Well it’s not getting through the others ways.

  9. Tom

    Mike doesn’t take sides. He just stands back to watch the world burn.

    1. Sensedog

      This makes sense. He doesn’t care for politics, it seems, but rather he appears to be more of an agent of chaos.

      1. Henry

        Holy shit, Mike is the Joker.

        1. Kernanator

          That makes far more sense than it should.

        2. Historyman68

          Nah, the Joker smiles. Mike just scowls. Though his occasional smiles are scary as fuck.

        3. George

          He’s too serious to be the Joker. There, now it only makes sense about halfway again.

        4. Justin

          Mike is the love child of the Joker and Batman. He’s got Bats’ permanent case of the scowls, Joker’s outlook on life.

        5. Blob Marley

          New fan theory: Batman/Joker are actually the same person, and he/they has/have a Tyler Durden thing going on.

          Best theory, or most bestest theory?

        6. CWR

          You just wrote Batman slash Joker…wait, rule 34.

          Do not want.

        7. TsunamiJane

          I like!

        8. Telos

          Alternate Theory: Mike is the Joker’s Tyler Durden.

        9. Broggly

          Alfred is the Joker. This is canon.

        10. Historyman68

          According to Whatever Happened to the Caped Crusader?, it totally is!

        11. Plasma Mongoose

          Mike is more like Batman but without the Bruce Wayne persona.

        12. twobeef

          And that’s the archenemy villain for Amazigirl right there.

    2. Pat

      Mike stands back?
      He’s an agent of chaos. He doesn’t watch, he creates.

  10. taekwondogirl

    Mike is great. I really like the slightly toned down assholeishness we see here in DoA.

  11. Darth Shadow

    Mike is his own side.

    1. Kernanator

      He’s his own sovereign nation as well.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Like Vatican City? Well he does almost as evil as the Pope I guess. 😀

      2. Joebo

        and his own unit of measure.

  12. Aydr

    DoA Mike is the best misanthrope ever.

    1. lightsabermario

      Mike is the Gurg.

  13. Nexev

    Mike is on whatever side you aren’t.

    Even if he is between two people arguing opposite viewpoints he is still against both of them.

    1. Kensou

      Normally I’d agree, but this once… I wonder if Mike hasn’t found a way to be on and against her side simultaneously? By his standards, that rejoinder was pretty… nice.

      1. Valdrax

        What I like most about DoA Mike is that he’s the moments Mike has with Amber (in SP) in which he’s nice without being nice ALL THE TIME.

      2. Pat

        He’s on her side, he just doesn’t agree with her.
        Like with Ethan.

        Of course, given how well that worked out, maybe he just finds these morons entertaining.

  14. Jar

    Yes Joyce. That is definitely what Gender Studies and in fact all of feminism is about. We don’t advocate for, like, women to have the choice to be a housewife or not or anything.
    I wish I didn’t know people who think like that in real life.

    1. lord of dance

      that may be true, but on the other side i’ve personally met more than a few “feminist” types that do openly and loudly disparage the housewife

      1. Shade

        I’m sure we can all agree though a few minority extremists of any group does not reflect the actual group.

        1. George

          But can Joyce?

        2. Doom shepherd

          Sadly, the loud annoying people with issues tend to get all the attention, and win by default. When the rational people remain quiet in the face of the crazies, they cannot help but be perceived as agreeing. “Qui tacet consentit”

    2. Zababcd

      As I’m currently studying Feminist Theory in my own Gender Studies class, I feel qualified to say that the ‘housewife vs career-woman’/’self-determination vs political obligation’ conundrum is not a modern concern. That’s second-wave feminism. Gender Studies has moved well beyond that by now… The problem is that Gender Studies is now a more obscure subject, so those who don’t study it themselves just have a snapshot of an earlier state of the theory that has long since been abandoned. By most.

      1. davidbreslin101

        There does seem to be this seriously messed-up, strawman parody of feminism floating about in our culture. It basically goes, “Feminism says women shouldn’t do traditional woman stuff ‘cos woman stuff is contemptible.”
        Conservatives use this idea to attack feminism, and liberals get themselves confused by it.
        It should be obvious that it’s fine to be a housewife or househusband, but somehow it’s not.

    3. DudeMyDadOwnsADealership

      The ironic thing is the women who think like that tend to be very prone to treating their husband and kids (primarily the kids) like their personal marionettes, through getting their own way via raw emotion, using their one-sided perspective, and those very gender double-standards, as a shield once the ring’s on their finger and children enter the family.

      Sound like a certain super-adorable freshman with huge cyan eyes when the subject of matrimony comes up?

      1. Usayasha

        Danny’s eyes aren’t anywhere NEAR blue!

  15. Tristan J

    You know, Joyce, you didn’t have to sign up for that class.

    … Wait, why did she sign up for that class?

    1. Thor

      She probably thought it was for studies appropriate to your gender, i.e., all the girls would be studying home ec, and all the boys would study farting auto shop.

      1. Historyman68

        I wish I’d taken farting auto shop.

        1. Tristan J

          I can’t count the number of times I need to fart my car into working. It’s such a useful skill to have.

        2. CWR

          Is it really a teachable skill, though? More of a talent, I’d think.

        3. Usayasha

          I’d say it’s an invention.
          In Japan.

    2. LiC

      I was wondering that same question.

  16. Ragnal

    I can’t tell who’s serious, and who’s sarcastic.

    Also, how long has Butt-Taco been up there?

    1. Kernanator

      It’s always been there. Watching you.

      1. BelOggy

        Like the Moon?

        1. fellixe

          A full moon.

        2. Plasma Mongoose

          “Like a pubic pizza-pie, that’s amore!”

        3. Kernanator

          pubic

          What the hell kind of songs have you been listening to?

    2. lucan

      More than a week I assume

    3. taekwondogirl

      I only now saw it. Egads.

    4. Blob Marley

      I didn’t notice Butt Taco til you said something.

    5. TsunamiJane

      I noticed it a few weeks ago. Been hoping someone would say something. 🙂

      1. Valdrax

        I’ve been pointedly ignoring it.
        Scatalogical humor just isn’t my thing.

  17. Joebo

    Mike is on no one’s “side.” He merely is.

  18. Kernanator

    Oh Joyce. Mike is on whatever side will amuse him the most at any given moment.

  19. Daeva

    Mike doesn’t take sides. He sits his ass on the fence and hocks the biggest possible loogies he can onto everything in your yard, shits on your lawn, and promptly convinces you the dog did it whether or not you actually have a dog.

    1. Kernanator

      This is the best possible analogy.

    2. Yotomoe

      It’s like you managed to embody mike in a sentence.

  20. BelOggy

    Bah! Mike Tells the truth in a way the listener can understand. . . . And if he’s usually a prick about it, well that seems to be the only way most people are able to learn. Through pain. And if they sometimes don’t understand untill too late, hey, they should have thought it over more carefully. I mean it’s Mike. And he does it for your own good. And his amusement.

    Mike is the oracle of DeeOhAy!

    1. Pat

      I’d agree, but he hasn’t been great at the “in a way the listener can understand” part recently.

  21. Icalasari

    …I wonder when Faz will appear in DoA?

    1. Henry

      I’m still dreading that inevitability.

  22. Wack'd

    Mike may be a dick, but a lot of his less broadly misanthropic stuff usually helps people come around to some sort of internal understanding.

    I can’t wait until we find out he’s trying to become a therapist.

    1. Wack'd

      Well, at least in the Walkyverse it does.

    2. Thor

      I know. You get by reading his tweets, you get the feeling that he’s really all about caring and understanding.

      http://twitter.com/#!/Shortpacked/dumbingofage

    3. Kernanator

      Mike would be the best therapist ever.
      “It seems to me that you believe that other people are at fault for not getting along with you, when the real problem is that you’re a dick.”

      “…”

      “Also, I fucked your mom.”

      1. Wizard

        Plus, he only charges a nickel for his services. Just like your mom.

    4. Historyman68

      At first I read that as “Mike may be a duck,” and thought “it all makes sense now!”

  23. Joe

    Mike is on the Audience’s side.
    Think: Has he ever had sex with your mother for a nickel? No?
    Then he’s shown you more kindness than any cast member in any area of the walkyverse.

    1. George

      That… makes way too much sense. He only does things that entertain us, he’s mean to everybody but us, and as a cross-universal constant force he’s probably aware of us so… wow, that actually works.

  24. Brendan

    Oh, Joyce…

    NO.

  25. Uniqueantique

    As an old time liberal feminist, I do not ‘look down on women who chose to be housewifes’. Women should have the same rights as men in that regard. Some men chose career over marriage, so do some women. Big deal. I did crewel embrodery for a side hobby for awhile, and my favorite framed one states my opinion pretty well, “Women belong in the home, and they should go there directly after work”. As for Mike, I think Mike dosn’t mess around with people who are stable. Not sure that is best way to say what I mean. But Joyce is firmly grounded in what she believes in-religion, her world view of ‘get a husband’. Mike’ if he respects anything,MAY respect ‘groundedness’. Or not.

    1. Yotomoe

      To be honest I’d rather be a stay-at-home dad so I can bond with mah kids and draw some comics. But i’m just a stupid kid.

    2. Ridureyu

      Thank you.

      My mom is an old-school feminist, and she chose to be a housewife. She’s just happy that she COULD choose to do so. And she is awesome.

    3. Pat

      Wait, you mean that Joyce is *wrong*?

  26. Tristan J

    You know, the backgrounds in this strip are really nice. I like panel 3 best.

    1. Wilkie

      I was just about to say this! The details of the campus are gorgeous and impeccable.

    2. Leorale

      Yeah! It adds so much to the world and the experience of reading. Opposite-of-Damn-You, Willis!

  27. Henry

    Mike is on nobody’s side but his own. And his own side demands that he be a tremendous asshole to everyone.

    Also, I fear I may have just had a vision of a feasible JoycexMike. And it is terrible.

  28. Ter

    That’s how Mike rolls, Joyce.

    And I’m sorry, but for a second there I thought it might be easy to ship them.

  29. Brasca1

    Friggin’? Crap? I hope Joyce isn’t turning into a potty mouth while she’s at school.

    1. davidbreslin101

      It’s amazing how many people think the first of those is just a cutesy euphemism for the “F word”.

      1. begbert2

        It’s amazing that you don’t. What’s your theory?

        1. davidbreslin101

          At least ’round here (northern England), “frig” is the female equivalent of “wank.” I think it turns up in James Joyce’s “Ulysses,” too.

        2. davidbreslin101

          …but, yeah. Note to self: “Avoid condescending tone.”

  30. NCP19

    Really? Really? No one’s made the “Mike will be in your inside…for a nickel” or something of that nature? I admit I botched it, but really, I expected a dozen variations of Mike’s “side” IS being “inside your mother…for a nickel.” It’s like the group matured overnight and I’m left rehashing old memes…I…I need a minute here.

    1. lawzlo

      Mike is on your mother’s side… for a nickel.

      Does that make you feel better?

      1. NCP19

        Yes, yes it does.

    2. TsunamiJane

      Some of it happened above.

      1. NCP19

        It hadn’t when I posted. I’m really glad that it did eventually happen. I was worried.

  31. waldosan

    mike isn’t even on his own side, he’ll do anything good or bad as long as it allows him to punch somebody in the face.

  32. iSaidCandleja-

    Something tells me only Schrodinger knows which side Mike is on.

  33. Plasma Mongoose

    Yes Joyce, we cannot have too many women choose the fulltime housewife route, if that happens, many businesses will be forced to hire just about anyone willing to work for them instead of having over three dozen applicant for every position to choose from.

    It will be end of civilization as we know it. 😛

  34. NF

    I so want to see Joyce have a radical feminist phase. It would be hilariously out of character.

    1. Jackson

      DoA!Anti-Joyce.

  35. Aesir

    I call it now, Joyce will get with Mike in this universe

    1. Maycroft

      I second that pairing.

  36. Zababcd

    Re panel 2:
    I care about Gender Studies. Actually, it seems to me that everyone taking Gender Studies cares about Gender Studies. Although to be fair, the people I encounter who are taking Gender Studies are pre-filtered according to who actually shows up at lectures/tutorials.

  37. Zorpheus

    Mike was on your mom’s side. All night long. For a nickel.

  38. Cathy Garrett

    The last time I was at the Showalter Fountain…

    It didn’t sit inside a circle. It sat inside a square that was used as a roundabout in front of the theatre. (That actually makes sense if you don’t think about it too hard. It was also paved with decrepit, crumbling asphalt.

    1. drs

      You might check Google Images…

  39. mechaqua

    Mike’s is on nobodys’ side, beacuse nobody is on his side.

  40. Maus

    I’m a gender studies major T_T

  41. drs

    As someone who went to IU OH GOD IT’S THAT FRIGGING CLOCK. Those red clocks — there’s multiple — were put up like 5 years ago or something, a ‘gift’ from a senior class maybe? Thing is, when they chime, the sound is annoying, goes on for like 2-3 minutes, and DOES NOT TELL YOU THE TIME. I stopped hanging around the arboretum because of them. I never did write a letter complaining about them, but I hate them.

  42. HiEv

    I always shake my head when conservatives try to slander/libel someone by calling them a liberal. Seriously guys, read a dictionary.

    Being liberal is all about progress and reform. It’s about protecting personal freedoms and civil liberties. It’s about being open minded, tolerant, and free of bigotry. How can anyone be against those things?

    1. Ray

      Whether or not the conservative/liberal labels are truly descriptive or not is a matter of much debate and semantics. However a non-zero amount of modern-day leftists or whatever you prefer to call them do not live up to the open mindedness, tolerance, and bigotry-free standards that you apparently automatically assign to them. A non-zero amount of right-wingers also do not live up to these things. Mostly they are the fringe element, the greatest mistake is to paint a large group with a broad brush and assume they all conform to the views of the fringe.

      1. HiEv

        I’m sorry, but where exactly did I do anything to indicate that I automatically assign them those traits? In fact, I do not. I was only talking about the meaning of a word, and how something that is such a positive thing is treated as though it is a bad thing by some people.

        Is everyone who is called a liberal really a liberal? No. Of course not. And I wasn’t making that claim. Saying I was is just a straw man. Heck I’d go so far as to say that many, if not most, conservatives are actually liberals, whether they realize it or not.

        My point is, that some get so caught up in the rhetoric that the actual meaning of words they’re using is ignored when trying to insult the other party, and I think it’s absurd that most people just accept this.

        I just hope that people begin responding to accusations of being a “liberal” with, “You’re damn right I care about progress, reform, personal freedom, and civil liberties! Don’t you?!?“

  43. ProfessorZoot

    This is my ship, my beautiful beautiful ship. Nothing could ever sail more majestically that the Miyce!

  44. Ray

    Bravo, Willis, for touching on the issue in a way that avoids angering either side and/or angers both sides equally.

    Honestly though, I support both women who want to be housewives AND women who want equality in the workplace. There’s really no reason to be against either thing nor does either thing negate the other.

  45. Random Guy

    Mike is on his own side, and if you cross the imaginary line he bites your head off.

  46. Kryss LaBryn

    Is– is it just me, or do the paving stones in the first panel kiiind of look like Optimus? Upside down? (Walky’s standing on his chest). I’d say it was just me, but it’s Willis-art… >.>

  47. Blur

    It’s just a title. Does Republican and Democrat mean what they originally meant?

    1. Kernanator

      Not really, no.

    2. Broggly

      No. Republicans are still radical feminists who hate alcohol, and Democrats are still pro-slavery and pro-silver.

    3. Asuka L.S.

      The Democrats were traditionally a party for the impoverished and people seeking diminished federal influence in states’ affairs. The Republicans, meanwhile, were mostly the business party. Ever since the Civil Rights Act of 1964 the composition of both parties (and thus their approaches) have dramatically shifted. Where once the Democrats held an incredibly tight grip over white southern males, that power is now held by the Republican Party. And the northeast, which used to be a Republican bastion, has been a Democratic mainstay for a very long time now.

      Nixon’s campaign team developed something called the “Southern Strategy”, a plan to try to secure the southeastern USA for the Republicans as one solid block. This involved focusing on “states’ rights” as an issue, and thus was born the Republican soundbite “let the states decide”. This strategy still lives on today, and it works very, very well in the southeast. It doesn’t work every time, but it works a LOT of the time.

  48. Hitoshi

    Ah Mike, you do care!

  49. wynne

    “The Venn Diagram of guys who don’t like smart women and guys you don’t want to date is a circle.” – John Green

  50. Hinoron

    I think it’s more like
    The last centuries civil rights advances,
    and the last couple decades’ civil rights revokement.

  51. Treb Meister

    WALKY’S SWEATER HANGS DOWN LIKE A MASSIVE DICK!!

  52. newllend

    He’s on nobodies side, ok rite now is the perfect time mike blow her mind, tell her about you gay fried ,no no tell her about walky, no wait tell her about both

  53. ProjectXa3

    Hey, that’s a familiar location!

  54. acoraz

    Mike is on nobody’s side, because nobody is on Mike’s side.

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