144

Thingy
Posted on February 10, 2024 by David M Willis

144 thoughts on “Thingy”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    “but water’s so… WET!”

    “so are YOU, from the sound of it”

    “*dies of mortification* …TEACH ME YOUR NOT-MORTIFIED WAYS”

    1. anon

      well, i’m sure some stuff is waterproof/some sex toys can be washed with a gentle soap and stuff but at least there arent ppl trolling joyce about using blood as lube

      1. Li

        I don’t think that’s what Roz meant by natural lubricant, though. Nothing the human body produces is waterproof.

  2. Nathan

    I’m going to start introducing myself as “an expert on things of certain natures”.

    1. PASchaefer

      And you probably are!

    2. Thag Simmons

      It’s funny regardless of what your actual expertise is.

    3. cbwroses

      And you have a particular set of skills.
      You’re also the best there is at what you do, and what you do is…

      1. clif

        The unnatural?

        1. MordWa

          For a jedi.

      2. SailorCakes

        Your mom for a nickel.

      3. John Campbell

        “I’m the best there is at what I do, and what I do is say, ‘I’m the best there is at what I do, and what I do is say, “I’m the best there is at what I do…

  3. Sirksome

    Complimentary in which way? Like the saying something nice way, or in like the peanuts and headphones you get on a flight way? Just kidding… those headphones aren’t complimentary.

    1. Ryan

      And the peanuts are were complementary.

    2. HueSatLight

      two complimentaries make a right.

    3. Leorale

      Complimentary is for saying something positive, complementary is for things that go together well.

      (English spelling is crazy.)

      1. ktbear

        As someone who has a Polish friend English spelling is a breeze.

        1. milu

          As someone who studied Polish (for like 6 months) that’s not true. Polish spelling is broadly if not entirely phonological. It may look daunting, but it’s actually not

        2. Hof1991

          Common name where I live is Przybilski, which can be spelled 28 different ways. But at least Polish is one language rather than the mashup that English is.

        3. Uly

          English is one language. Most, if not all, languages have borrowings. English is not “a mashup”. It is simply Germanic language.

        4. Dara

          Which is why all of our verbs we at the end put.

          C’mon, even the grammar is half French.

        5. Uly

          Sorry, I hit post too soon – although we do not determine what language family a language is in by counting up borrowings, it is worth noting that Polish has a large number of borrowed words from other languages such as German, Russian, Czech, Latin, and English.

          Because borrowing is an extremely common phenomenon in language.

        6. milu

          @ Uly Thank you!
          @Hof i assume you are joking? (Also don’t really care about linguistics based on your other statement?) There is only one way to spell Przybilski the way it’s pronounced in Polish. Except possibly some accents don’t distinguish between y and i? I’m not an expert. Poles please correct if wrong

      2. Li

        Sirksome was right, though. Complementary is when things go well together, but complimentary is when things are given free of charge. Peanuts and headphones on airplanes were complimentary as in free, and that’s the joke Sirksome makes at the end.

    4. Mark

      Complimentary like “I admire your self-confidence in such matters and would like to learn some.”

    5. Warcodered

      A better way of phrasing it would be how did you get over embarrassment or how are you not too embarrassed about those things, I guess?

  4. shadowcell

    Dumbing of Age Book 14: COMPLIMENTARY!

  5. BBCC

    Oh god please, yes, I need these two to talk about this.

    And kudos to Willis for finally finding a place to mention Roz writes for the newspaper! I know he said years ago he’d been looking for a place to mention it.

    1. Sirksome

      She should talk to Roz more. She’s been low key very supportive of Joyce’s sexual awakening I guess? (I don’t know how to phrase that in a non creepy way) Plus Joyce is dating Joe. They have things in common.

      1. Mark

        Roz is genuinely supportive at times, but she’s also a sex fangirl and can become overzealous, self-absorbed and insensitive when boosterism has got her in its grip. But yes, if they can moderate their Joyceness and Rozness a bit, the conversation could be good for both of them.

    2. anon

      imagine her being like “oh joe was pretty good/willing to communicate”, don’t worry about sex with him

      tho idk if it’s a lot of baggage for her to handle/talk to about

      1. thejeff

        Her times with Joe were when he was still in full horndog mode. She’s not going to have good things to say about him.

        IIRC in one of the Slipshines she said he had stamina and was available when she didn’t have other option. Something like that.

  6. Cassie

    Roz, you have here a pupil who wants to learn to embrace herself, figuratively and literally. Are you really going to just walk away without helping her find her path to sexual happiness? Or are you actually going to show that your activism isn’t simply performative?

    1. Coatl

      I don’t think Joyce would be able to ask her much in depth about Joe, would she?

      I mean, is she aware that they were both in some intimacy?

      Although on second thought, I think Roz is going to want to use this to her advantage, and not in the good way.

      1. cbwroses

        Joyce watched the video, so yes, she’s aware.

      2. Needfuldoer

        You said “in depth”.

    2. UrsulaDavina

      Roz and Joyce don’t really get along and this encounter is kind of an example of that dynamic

      1. Jeremiah

        Yeah, I am sure Roz would be pretty happy to provide assistance of it if it was anyone other than Joyce. They haven’t had the best relationship.

      2. Coatl

        Perhaps, due to some kind of malice on Roz’s part, she confesses details about Joe and that discourages Joyce from an intimate perspective.

        1. UrsulaDavina

          I don’t think she is malicious and would probably answer Joyce’s questions albeit in a blunt manner but hopefully not condescending manner, with Roz she can be kind of condsending.

        2. Coatl

          Good point.

        3. Freemage

          In most cases, Roz isn’t malicious, I’d agree–thoughtless would be the preferred term, I think. But with Joyce? She’s been actively hostile on two occasions, both times in class, in front of others. If that’s not malice, it’s definitely a kissing cousin.

          And yes, I do think that if any character other than Mary had asked Roz how she became so sexually shameless, Roz would (correctly) interpret it as “sexually uninhibited” and give a straight answer, albeit probably after insisting on the less condemnatory language choice.

        4. Imogen

          In fairness to Roz, Joyce isn’t the main character from her perspective like she is to ours. Roz hasn’t been there for all of Joyce’s growth. Joyce said some pretty awful stuff towards the start! Like, as far as Roz knows, Joyce voted for [the most recent Republican presidential candidate as of Whatever Year This Comment Is Being Read In].

        5. Regina phalange

          I mean, last time they interacted, Joyce gave Roz “the” (a) finger and told her to “fudge off.” Not saying that Roz didn’t deserve it, but it’s not like Joyce has done nothing at all to warrant a certain level of hostility from Roz. I’m pretty sure toward the beginning Joyce was straight-up insulting her to her face. I’m not all that convinced that hostility borne of genuine personality conflict is close to malice (at least the kind of malice that would lead Roz to bring up Joe out of spite). Hostility is just being an ass; malice is more personal, and hard to accomplish without genuine hate for another person. Roz has reached out to Joyce enough times in (misguided) helpfulness that I wouldn’t say Roz genuinely has hatred for her. She just doesn’t like her.

        6. Mark

          They have been political opponents. Not the stupid party vs. party thing, but on an actual issue. I’m sure that Roz thinks of Joyce as carrying the banner for repression and shame. I’m not sure of Joyce’s precise current position, but it’s going to take time for her to learn a new idiom for talking about these matters, so she’s still reinforcing that impression.

        7. StClair

          From Roz’s (very and understandably) limited perspective, Joyce isn’t that different from Mary. 🙁

    3. BBCC

      I think Roz will help eventually but probably not when they’re both trying to shower.

      1. Steve C

        This punchline almost writes itself.

    4. DashWallkick

      Roz has been subjected to Joyce’s obliviously rude judgments since they started college, she’s probably not the “forgive and forget” type even on her favorite subject. Unless she can lord it over her like with the birth control topic.

    5. Bash

      It’s less about sex and more about puritanical guilt, which is something Roz absolutely does not want to deal with.

    6. Proto

      “Look if you want help with something of a sexual nature please consent that I can use this story it in my column”

    7. anonymsly

      I note that Roz SAID she was going to walk away and didn’t do so. ‘I’m walking away now’ may we’ll be code for ‘stop insulting me if you want my help’.

    8. Mturtle7

      Roz: “Sure, I COULD fight the patriarchy and help this woman gradually learn to accept her own body and gender for what they are, but WHY would I do that when there’s nothing in it for ME?!”

  7. Mr. Random

    Probably trying stuff.

  8. Jamie

    Huh. I didn’t know that.

    1. Rose by Any Other Name

      Yup. Water sucks as lube.

      If you actually want to successfully have sex in a hottub or similar, then silicone lube is your friend. It’s the only one water resistant enough to last in that environment.

      No idea if it damages the hottub jets, though.

      1. Miri

        I could see it damaging hot tubs. Depending on the material of personal toys, they may have warnings that silicone lube can damage them…

        1. milu

          I was sure that silicone lube is bad for silicone toys. Apparently it’s slightly more complicated than that (there are additives in the production of silicone that can make it less stable) but according to this least dodgy-sounding top result i could find (but who knows maybe the chemists interviewed are bankrolled by Big Water-based Lube) it remains best practice to avoid silicone and oil-based lube with silicone toys.

      2. Opus the Poet

        It doesn’t, but the male discharge can clog the filter. (don’t ask how I know)

        1. morleuca

          I used to lifeguard at a hotel, can confirm. And condoms eventually melt while in the filter

        2. milu

          No it cant, thats a common urban legend. Sperm turns liquid after like 30min

        3. Purblebirb

          I thought that was about Spider-Man’s webbing

        4. jflb96

          We definitely got an email in halls about the penis-having residents in one of the blocks needing to switch to tissues

        5. StClair

          Insert joke here about having vs. “having”.

          Insert other joke here about “inserting”.

        6. milu

          Citation needed as to how it was determined that semen was the offending substance

        7. HueSatLight

          That sounds like a “someone’s leaving cum on the floor/walls” not “it’s clogging the pipes” sort of thing.

          ceiling’s ok. good for them.

      3. Eff M.

        We hold a yearly kinky camping event. At one previous campground there were very prominent signs: “No sex in the hot tub!” Our campers are generally really good about campground rules and I never heard about any of ours violating that, but we did get to hear some stories from the campground staff.

        Short answer: Yeah, you can, but you probably shouldn’t!

    2. anon

      if anything other than some kinda seat or like bathmat i’d be worried about ppl wanting shower sex if they accidentally slip or so lol

  9. Nono

    Joyce you do realise that the neighbouring stalls can likely hear what you’re saying right

    1. Sirksome

      The neighboring stalls should mind their own business!

    2. Needfuldoer

      You know the shower stall grime is going to gossip with the kitchen floor residue.

  10. RassilonTDavros

    Huh. I learned a thing today!

  11. DailyBrad

    Honestly, “shameless” in this context isn’t even really insulting. “Inhabited” would maybe be a little less so, though, but Jocelyn’s the writer in the family, she’s probably got the stronger vocabulary for this kind of tact.

    1. Dday

      Surely, but the word makes sense from Joyce’s point of view because she feels so much shame.

    2. Zero

      Sexually inhabited is… a different thing.

      1. zee

        I think that’s just pregnancy

      2. DailyBrad

        Whoops, meant to put “uninhibited”. Not sure what the hell went on there, I must’ve been very distracted.

    3. Bash

      Joyce doesn’t mean it as an insult, but her choice of words emphasizes that she views sexual shame as the default. If Roz continues this conversation she’s going to have to unwind a lot of fundie indoctrination.

      1. anonymsly

        She clearly means to ask ‘I want to stop being like this, how did you stop’ I agree.

      2. Dday

        Lol, I can’t help but wonder if Roz is going to try to carefully deconstruct Joyce’s terminology while she keeps trying to *focus*

    4. Eff M.

      Loaded words can be difficult to overcome, particularly given some backgrounds. Many of us proudly claim some of these words — queer or slut, for instance, but it can be hard to break out of that indoctrination.

      Some LGBTQ+ people vehemently object to the usage of queer, although many others have been reclaiming it since the 80s. Most of us are somewhere in between on it. I use it as a label, but I still have some hesitancy to use it around cis-hets since so many of them think it’s a slur!

      Joyce is at the point where she’s starting to accept her sexuality as positive, so I can see her trying to break out of that shell, but there’s some part of her that’s still hearing that programmed shame she was raised with. “Sexually shameless” for her is still a really low bar!

      1. StClair

        “You’re just normalizing its use!”

        “Yes? That’s the point.“

      2. thejeff

        Far as I can tell, while some of them pretend otherwise about 90% of the LGBTQ+ people who object to “queer” are just transphobes who object to anything that lets trans people seem part of the club.

  12. bubba0077

    This is the corollary to saying “with all due respect”.

  13. Dday

    Idunno Joyce usually i think of public masturbators having the shameless thing down pat

  14. sakamism

    Lmao. The word you were looking for is “liberated”, Joyce

  15. Taffy

    Yeah, water sucks as a lubricant on its own. That’s why I started using a 2:1 ratio of club soda and Pinesol a few years ago.

    1. StClair

      ? ?

  16. cbwroses

    So am I the only one who’s reading the lower speech bubbles as Joyce’s vagina talking?

    1. Blibdoolpoolp

      Well now I can’t help but.

    2. StClair

      Monologuing, as it were.

  17. HueSatLight

    for someone who is so sexually ashamed, Joyce is pretty social during masturbation.

    1. Emperor Norton II

      The next Slipshine will be this strip, but we’ll see Joyce masturbating while she talks to Roz.

    2. Zaxares

      It’s like one of those things where it’s SO extreme that it loops back around and Joyce doesn’t realize that having a discussion with someone else while your fingers are in your hoo-hah isn’t something most people will do/are comfortable with. XD

      1. milu

        She is trying really hard to be a normal person who just casually masturbates while having a neighbourly chat nbd

    3. Skater Girl

      Considering how she learned to do it, this hardly surprising.

    4. Aviator

      It’s just how she was taught.

    5. HueSatLight

      I hope Amber is in the next stall and joins the conversation.

  18. Lingo

    One thing Roz and Robin have in common: They’re both shameless.

    1. morleuca

      Tweet tweet

  19. AbacusWizard

    Dumbing of Age, Book 15: An Expert on Things of Certain Natures

  20. Suet

    At least she’s complimenting, nobody knows if it’s the sentiment among those subscribed to Roz’s OnlyFans.

    Imagine seeing Walky’s section then seeing Roz’s. Hers clears.

  21. Heather

    I have heard people managing to put quotation marks around certain words simply using intonation (and without even using the air quotes fingers gesture), but Joyce being able to do it with brackets is impressive

    1. GLaDOS

      I don’t think Joyce has her hands free to do air quotes.

    2. Mturtle7

      It’s not that hard to do, honestly! (earnest)

      At least, no harder than using vocal “air quotes”. It’s just a learned skill, that happens to be particular to younger generations of people online. I do it all the time, myself. (self-congratulatory)

    3. HueSatLight

      drop a register and lower volume.

  22. Spriteless Aunty

    For anyone in a similar situation, it’s better to say ‘I want to shed my shame’s than ‘you are shameless l.’

    1. Yumi

      “Free of sexual shame” seems to me like it would also work.

      1. anonymsly

        Yeeeah, I’m sure Joyce meant ‘I want to stop feeling shame, I want to be like you, how do I do it?’ But she doesn’t have the vocabulary, and I’m pretty sure Roz gets slut-shamed more than regularly enough to have a very low bar for ‘I’m done with this conversation’.

        1. spriteless aunty

          Neither of us mentioned Joyce. But yeah, this is a well written back and forth that is true to the characters. Since we are not fictional characters who say things to heighten drama, gaining weeks of wisdom per year, we might want to not do the same as she.

  23. C.T. Phipps

    I am genuinely interested in how Ros will react to the fact Joyce is dating Joe.

  24. Amós Batista

    Joyce still having no adequate approaching ? Roz taking everything from Joyce as an insult.

  25. Amelie Wikström

    Maybe this is a passing concern, and maybe it’s not entirely the right place to address it, but the Shortpacked! website seems super dead?

    Also congrats to Roz on yet another successful display of ideological righteousness in which you utterly fail to help someone with an actual problem. Okay, the someone is always Joyce, but it’s still a staggeringly consistent pattern.

    1. anonymsly

      In fairness, Joyce WAS being insulting. Saying ‘complimentary’ after insulting someone doesn’t change the fact that it’s an insult. Roz gets insulted and demeaned every day in exactly this way, I imagine, so she’s not going to have a lot of patience in general.

    2. C.T. Phipps

      You’ll have to explain how its ideological righteousness not to want to talk to someone while they’re masturbating and insulting you.

      1. Amelie Wikström

        Roz is super on board with sex, including talking people through masturbation education while they are masturbating, going by this strip alone. But this person on the other side of the door doesn’t know what she’s doing in the exact way that Roz is prepared for, so she’s leaving.

    3. HueSatLight

      For the shortpacked site, if you mean that the comments were all missing, I think they were being spammed or something and the solution ended up hiding all comments. Or if you mean the links from walkypedia don’t work, that’s correct. If there’s a way to massage the URLs, I don’t know it, but the strips are all still there.

      1. Amelie Wikström

        No, I mean that shortpacked.com gives an instant “server not found” error if you try to go there.

        1. HueSatLight

          I’m seeing it fine, on firefox. if you know pinging, can you ping it?

        2. Amelie Wikström

          I do not. But I know isitdownforeveryone tells me it is just me. Maybe it’s related to the error that afflicted like five people on this site a couple months back.

  26. Stephen Nedland

    About time Roz got involved; she should have been the one helping Joyce, from the onset. No matter what you personal feeling are about Roz, you cannot deny that she is the, more qualified, in Joyce’s social circle. Roz may lack tact, but the information she will give out will be straight forward, and nonjudgemental, the two things that will benefit Joyce the most. Her friends, no matter how well intentioned, are going to handle Joyce, with kid gloves, due to both her Fundie origins, and her ADD/ADHD. Roz will give zero effs about those things; Joyce asks her a question, and Roz will give her an answer. Initially, this will make Joyce feel uncomfortable, but in the long term, she will discover that it will be the most helpful.

    1. Daibhid C

      Joyce has ADHD now? Did we decide that if the strip was going to actually say she’s autistic, diagnosing her with that was no fun any more?

      1. Stephen Nedland

        Autism, that’s what was; I just couldn’t remember what she had been diagnosed with.

        1. Taffy

          She hasn’t.

        2. Uly

          True. However, from a narrative perspective it doesn’t make much sense for her to randomly get a referral for a diagnosis when visiting the doctor for another reason unless she actually is autistic.

        3. Taffy

          That’s not important.

        4. Uly

          Well, I suppose you’re allowed to hold that opinion, but I disagree.

        5. Taffy

          That’s also not important.

        6. Uly

          I will iterate back up to my previous comment and add an additional “I know you’re not, but what am I?” to the end.

    2. anonymsly

      I completely agree! Roz will give Joyce the straight facts and doesn’t fundamentally think of Joyce as a toddler unable to make her own choices when provided with good information. (Also, I honestly think from Becky’s showing re: Ethan that Becky would ALSO do her best to be supportive and nonjudgemental, she’s just less experienced/knowledgeable than Roz. It’s really only Dorothy and Sarah who are bad choices here because they hate Joe and infantilize Joyce to a greater or lesser degree in both cases.)

    3. spriteless aunty

      Roz is very qualified, but is barely in her social circle.

      1. Stephen Nedland

        Never said they were close. And being on the periphery of the circle, is still inside the circle.

  27. Da Boy

    Give her some slack Roz she is still learning XD

  28. Hoboturtle

    Grrrr Roz. Time to hate Roz. Doesn’t matter if she is being insulted, being opposed to someone doing the wrong thing or is just not interacting with any of the main characters. We all hate Roz. Grrr

  29. C.T. Phipps

    I think Roz is under no obligation not to run screaming from this whole situation.

  30. Bruno

    See, as a person, Roz is right to be offended by this. But as a sexpert, as a self-appointed sex educator, it’s a deriliction of duty to act all hoity toity about this. If everyone were well-educated, they wouldn’t need sexperts.

    1. StClair

      But understandable and human, especially if the person seeking advice has – up to now, and to Roz – acted like a marginally less annoying version of Mary (merely ignorant and insensitive, rather than mean-spirited).
      “oh so now you want my help, now I have value to you? hypocrite.”

      1. Schpoonman

        Joyce has apologized to Roz before about her prior behavior, I’m like 96% sure. And if not, now is a great time to do so and also maybe update Roz on Joyce current stances.

  31. Derek

    I can’t remember, did Joyce actually call Roz a slut previously or did she only do the “nice” version of it in which she says Roz is going to hell because her flower has been plucked too many times? I know the latter for sure, but I don’t know about the former.

    Either way, Joyce has told Roz more than once that she’s going to hell, that she’s tainted, that she’s been dirtied and worth less because Roz was openly sexual; Joyce has changed since then but Roz has all the reasons in the world to to be snippy with her

    1. Taffy

      That won’t hold up in court. Try again.

    2. Hoboturtle

      Going through Roz’s tag. The “nice” version. Joyce talked about how having sex is liking plucking a flower. Roz said that was bs. Joyce said that Roz was down to her root.

      Thought strangely enough I would say that Dorothy was slut shaming Roz more. Basically saying that her opinion for an article didn’t mean much because she had a sex tape and then blaming Roz when she didn’t know that Joyce was attacked at a party.

      Looking back Roz kind of has more reason to dislike Dorothy (and Joyce to a lesser extent) then vis versa.

      1. Li

        Excelt that then Dorothy apologized:

        https://www.dumbingofage.com/2011/comic/book-1/06-yesterday-was-thursday/compete/

        And even essentially apologized later for competing against her for the RA spot:

        https://www.dumbingofage.com/2017/comic/book-7/03-the-thing-i-was-before/misery/

        Their most recent interaction had Roz being pretty uninvitedly judgmental of Dorothy, so if anyone’s owed an apology at this point, it’s Dorothy — but I think Roz would argue that she was just trying to stand up for Joyce, and that Joyce might even quietly agree with that, so…

        I do wonder though if Roz would have been as combative with Dorothy if she’d known the full details. Roz had fun with Joe, but would she, too, harbor some misgivings if she knew he was the boy Dorothy was trying to get Joyce to reconsider sleeping with for her first sexual experience? ?

        (I tend to think “yes”, but also “might be too stubborn to back down once she’d committed to a position”. And she might specifically defend Joyce’s right to make mistakes, too.)

  32. HueSatLight

    Worth noting that when Joyce told Roz to leave her alone with all the sex talk, Roz did until Joyce brought it up again.

  33. JA

    There is one instance where water actually does work. It just has to be so softened that you practically can’t towel it off and where even the smallest amount of soap with it floods half your bathroom with suds.

  34. bunivasal

    “Hey Roz, how did you get over the extremely intense stress and anxiety that comes with being a sexual being existing in a hyper-shameful religious community? Even as I’m asking this I realize that we are not the same.”

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *

*

*

*

This site uses Akismet to reduce spam. Learn how your comment data is processed.