272

Virtue
Posted on April 30, 2025 by David M Willis

272 thoughts on “Virtue”

  1. NGPZ

    hey now Dorothy, Joe might actually be into that XD

    1. ZombieKyrik

      Considering how worried he has been about doing the right things calling it her “virtue” might make Joe worried about not “defiling” her.

      Which is a gross way to look at it, but this isn’t Smarting of Age.

      1. Dante

        Aw man, y’all remember when he asked Roz for advice because he was THAT worried about defiling her.

        Meanwhile Becky struck gold and found the solution: Fuck now, atone later, turn the cycle into a kink

        1. Felian

          I’ve been there….. religious shame runs deep but so does being young & horny.

    2. True Survivor

      I think Dorhtory is right, for if it is a virtue, then it can’t be a vise.

      1. Risky

        Depends what it’s vising, such as her virtuousness.

      2. Shade

        I mean, for Joe’s sake hopefully its not.

      3. Deanatay

        I need to correct this, even if it is the joke: ‘vise’ is the tool used to press two things together, ‘vice’ is the opposite of virtue.

        As for the joke: a little tightness is good, but too much makes you feel unwelcome…

        1. Decidedly Orthogonal

          And… we’re back to people’s kinks. ?

    3. Opus the Poet

      I’m going to be calling female genitals “Whoopsiepoodles” for a while now. You can’t stop me.

      1. GT

        ^^That^^

      2. Clif

        Nor would we want to.

      3. Steamweed

        Thanks for the comment! I first misread it as ‘whoopsieDoodle’. ‘WhoopsiePoodle’ is even better!

        1. Airyu

          “WhoopsiePoodle” can be used for the other type of genitals

        2. BorkBorkBork

          A whoopsiedoodle is what you get when you cross a whoopsiepoodle with whoopsietriever. Hypoallergenic, doesn’t shed, have to get it regularly groomed though.

        3. Steamweed

          Yes, very important to regularly groom your whoopsiepoodle, whoopsiedoodle, and whoopsieretriever.

  2. Nono

    Vertical or horizontal stripeys?

    1. AbacusWizard

      Chevrons.

      1. AbacusWizard

        [insert “chevron one unlocked” joke here]

        1. Steamweed

          Stargates form stable wormholes.
          (hurrhurrhurr)

    2. Tan

      Y’know, I was thinking horizontal and was like “Obviously orange” but if it’s vertical…. Maaaaaaybe pink? I don’t know.

    3. Disastroid

      A dazzle pattern to prevent accurate targeting at sea.

      1. achallenger

        dang it you got there first

      2. Fnord

        Pretty sure she WANTS to be penetrated, though.

      3. Steamweed

        Per five-days’-ago SMBC.

    4. achallenger

      razzle dazzle so they can’t tell when you’re coming

    5. Anon

      i don’t think i’ve seen many vertical striped panties versus horizontal other than some ‘two toned’ stuff

  3. Shakes

    The mirrored panels of them looking down is killing me.

  4. DailyBrad

    How’s this not a new poll? Pink, I think.

    1. GreedOfGram

      That was literally my first thought after reading this too.

      1. Decidedly Orthogonal

        Probably because we’re still watching how far up the kinsey scale Dorothy is gonna climb. (possibly by finding out if she goes down. How does going down make one go up?

        …

        Don’t answer that. I figured it out. ?)

  5. Icalasari

    Joyce

    Stay the way you are

    No seriously, considering how Joe is, don’t add anything else

    1. Anon

      well, maybe just a little bit uninhibited/more impulsive or so/being ok even without ‘prepping’ with dorothy considering she really wanted to get drunk together with joe tho idk if she would’ve wanted to also hook up then as well

  6. Sanrai

    Call ot your hooha.

    1. Rose by Any other Name

      I’m a fan of “nether lips” personally.

      .

      It’s funny because both interpretations of that sentence are true.

  7. V98

    Ok forget what I said about clothes being safely on!

    BATTLE STATIONS, SHIPPERS

    1. Dante

      AYE, CAP’N!

      1. NGPZ

        “I can’t hear you!!!” >:D

        1. Dara

          [distant screaming grows louder]

        2. NGPZ

          AYE AYE CAPTAIN!!!! XD

    2. Steamweed

      Joyce is gonna start taking off and trying on different colored panties, isn’t she. This will have no effect on Dotty, of course. 😛

  8. Doopyboop

    So long as it’s clean and doesn’t have, like, period stains on it. Or doesn’t say ‘Monday’ when it’s Friday.

    1. Effie

      “… and I told him, and he didn’t believe me. They don’t make Sunday.”

    2. eh, whatever

      Period stains I wouldn’t mind. Shitstains are gross.

      1. Anon

        @eh
        if she’s about to have sex, it’d be a little concerning tho considering she’s on the pill too i imagine she doesn’t have any stains

    3. Taffy

      Do you label them by what day they’re meant to be put on? That’s very organized.

      1. chrisashtear

        There are actual pantie sets that have the days of the week on them

  9. Claire

    Watch out Willis or you’re going to beat out chickweed lane for horniest comic strip ever produced.

    1. Dante

      omg don’t invoke that name in this hallowed comment section [crosses self]

    2. Freezer

      DoA is 500% less schizo in tone (and less creepy) than 9CL. And 10000$ more stable on a space-time level.

      1. Freezer

        That was supposed to be a percent sign, but dollars works as well in context.

        1. Opus the Poet

          +1! (thumbs up emoji!)

      2. Aquila

        And somewhere, for no reason they can think of, hundreds of math majors just facepalmed.

    3. Kyulen

      I’m not convinced it’s possible for a comic strip to be more horny than 9 Chickweed Lane, with the exception of actual porn comics.

      1. Freezer

        Arlo & Janis is pretty horny, just not as pretentiously overt about it.

        1. Steamweed

          Also pretty sure that A&J features much less pubescent children’s sexuality.

        2. HueSatLight

          Arlo and Janis is the most wholesomely thirsty strip.

  10. Sirksome

    Better than calling it her maidenhead or her womanhood…probably.

    1. Rose by Any other Name

      Well, maidenhead only refers to the hymen itself, not the vulva, which is what Joyce is talking about.

      As for womanhood, that matches up with manhood of the throbbing variety, so that’s just good old fashioned romance novel speak.

    2. Steamweed

      Next strip’s gonna be them modeling and deciding on underwear while discussing correct lady-part terminology.

      1. Mgnostic

        Even after being raised around a bunch of frank speaking women who didn’t censor conversations just because I was in the room I still get occasionally surprised with the names women use for their genitals. Sitting in a staff meeting with a group of female medical professionals I heard a lead physician refer to hers as her “Hoo Haa”. I think women have about as many names for their genitals as we guys do.

  11. Animedingo

    Pink

    1. Rose by Any other Name

      No, that’s clearly still Paramore.

      Also, it’s spelled P!nk.

      (before anyone protests, this is a joke, meant for humor purposes)

      1. Nymph

        It’s a good joke.

      2. Roborat

        So what. You want to fight?

  12. ZombieKyrik

    Dorothy is holding up well all things considered. Which begs the question; what could/will go wrong?

    1. Clif

      Let us count the ways.

      One Infinity.
      Two Infinities.
      Three Infinities.
      …

      1. eh, whatever

        Countable or uncountable infinities?

        1. Dara

          Countable, clearly, what with them being, you know

          counted

        2. Steamweed

          Now, are they rational infinities or irrational infinities? Considering these two, I’m leaning toward irrational infinities.

    2. Freezer

      If I had to guess: Joyce goes full On The Spectrum (Hollywood Edition) and starts obliviously peppering Dorothy with inappropriately intimate questions. Questions that would be over the line even for someone not harboring Perverse Sexual Lust for her.

      And Dorothy will A) Shut her down and tell her that this is stuff she should really be discussing with either Joe or a councilor, B) panic and flee, C) panic and kiss her.

      1. Azhrei Vep

        D) Panic, Kiss her, and flee yelling at her to talk to Joe about it with no spaces to indicate she’s rushingthroughitasquicklyaspossibleokaybyeeeeeee!!

        1. Steamweed

          I’m putting my five bucks on D.

    3. Anon

      imagine if she asked for more ‘practiced’ and dorothy had to use a vibrator/dildo or so, since i imagine during the ‘laundry room’ incident there was no internal/self penetration or so

  13. Sirksome

    So is the implication that Joyce is totally bare ass right now. Pussy out and confident.

    1. Taffy

      As she should be.

    2. Rose by Any other Name

      I mean, going commando for the purpose of having sex is a pretty standard move, particularly if she doesn’t need to travel outside. Just don’t wear tight pants.

    3. Nymph

      Donald Ducking it. Winnie the Pooh rn.

    4. Leadsynth

      It’s normal to go bare-assed under a towel post-shower, right? Maybe it’s different in a dorm situation, but I would assume No Underwear under a towel.

    5. Steamweed

      We saw her put on a shirt, but we did not see pants. Quite rational to assume she’s sans pants now. Dotty can’t see from her viewpoint, since Joyce is too close to the bed.

    6. Steamweed

      Also, ‘pussy out and confident’ makes me think of the DoA vagina-owner cast forming their own ‘Confident Pussy Club’ (as seen in GwS). Dotty would make a fine Hazel-analog.

  14. Uly

    Whoopsiepoodle?

    1. ZombieKyrik

      Joyce has excellent skills in her coming up with names for anything sex related.

      1. eh, whatever

        More likely her mother…

    2. Dave Van Domelen

      In a whoopsie-poodle cut.

    3. Masumi

      I first read that as whoopsiepuddle, which somehow makes more sense in a funny way.

    4. Deanatay

      Willis maintaining his PG-13 rating.

      1. Taffy

        If this is PG-13, the rating system needs a little refining.

        1. Deanatay

          It always has.

    5. Nymph

      Her virginia, her lady garden, her applebee’s sampler platter, her hooha, her winkwinknudgenudge, her vagina

      1. Steamweed

        I chortled aloud at ‘applebee’s sampler platter’.

    6. Mgnostic

      Poodle fits with describing the short and curlies.

  15. Fevley

    Orange, so they match the shirt

    1. Dante

      Pink, so they contrast it (?)

    2. ZombieKyrik

      Pink, so they will compliment the orange, and make for a sexy combo.

      1. eh, whatever

        Pink and orange is a horrible combination.

        1. Nymph

          Strongly disagree, it’s very tropical and cute.

        2. NGPZ

          right???

          heck I’m eating tropical taffy of those exact colors rn XD

        3. Anon

          i think it’s cute but it’d be a lighter shade or so, i’m sure joyce has some orange/pink tops as well and i doubt her underwear is like hot pink/neon orange

      2. Yumi

        I like pink and orange as a combo, but it does depend on the shades/tints. Them being stripped also throws me for some reason, otherwise I’d almost definitely say to go with the pink.

        1. Yumi

          …typo on “striped,” but you know what…

        2. Steamweed

          Probably doesn’t at all matter what color, for Joe at least. Being inexplicably distracted by other things, he’s not going to notice nor remember the cloth and color.

    3. Taffy

      I agree wholefartedly.

      1. Clif

        Muchly bettersome and nigh on to goodly.

      2. Steamweed

        What about holetartedly?

    4. NGPZ

      imma say pink, so she looks like a tasty sorbet

      but this really needs a site poll :p

    5. Yumi

      Pink, so if they’re stripped with white (and maybe two shades of pink) and she’s wearing them and the shirt, they remind Joe of the lesbian flag and then he thinks about Dorothy’s attraction to Joyce (this could be before or after he and Joyce have sex), and then the underwear is plot-significant.
      Though in that case, Joyce should really change her whole outfit to go with a bisexual flag color scheme.

  16. Dante

    CALLED IT.

    “You wanna guess the colour of my underwear
    You wanna know what I got goin’ on down there
    Is it pretty in pink or all see-through?
    Is it showin’ off my brand-new lower-back tattoo?”

    VS

    “Don’t have to guess the color of your underwear
    Already know what you’ve got goin’ on down there
    It’s that lacy black pair with the little bows
    The ones I picked out for you in Tokyo”

  17. Joe Moose

    It is time for everyone’s favorite quiz show: What are the color of Mela Mer- uhm no, Joyce’s panties!

    1. AbacusWizard

      I’m not *glad* that I understood that reference, but I understood that reference.

      1. BSD

        oof, big s[h]ame.

      2. Roborat

        Holy carp, a Xanth reference! not something I ever expected to see. And Plaid, if memory serves.

    2. Freezer

      #IUnderstoodThatReference

    3. Deanatay

      I feel no shame. Xanth was a big part of my childhood.

      1. Steamweed

        Ahh. I didn’t catch it; stopped reading that series before _Color of Her Panties_.

  18. Ty34er

    She really went full Winnie the Pooh right now, huh

    1. Steamweed

      Donald Duck
      Porkie Pig
      Winnie Pooh

  19. Dara

    all i wanted was you

    all i wanted was you

    even the music is trying to help them figure it out

  20. HueSatLight

    pink with orange stripes or orange with pink stripes?

    1. Nadamás

      I assume the other color is white.

    2. Taffy

      What nobody tells you is, the stripes are secretly both colors at once and shift depending on your viewing angle.

      1. Nymph

        This will divide the internet for weeks.

        1. Taffy

          It’ll dominate the public consciousness, forcing everyone to never shut the fuck up about it, until yeah a few weeks go by and they move on to the next stupid thing.

  21. Wraithy2773

    I’m gonna say it: “Virtue” is a hell of a lot less of a turn-off than “whoopsiepoodle”.

    1. Mel

      I feel if you’re into Joyce you gotta be ready for the whoopsiepoodle

      1. AbacusWizard

        Dumbing of Age, Book 17: Ready for the Whoopsiepoodle

      2. Freezer

        Once I heard that, I’d never call it anything but.

    2. Dante

      The mental image of “whoopsiepoodle” is ghastly. I’ll leave it to y’all’s imaginations

      1. True Survivor

        I am imaging something align the lines of the inside-out exploding lizard-boar thing from Galaxy Quest. Just with more bile covered pink-fur.

      2. Eyebrow

        The image I got was of “whoopsiepuddle”

      3. Steamweed

        Oh, but the term _requires_ a careful trimming of public hair to a poodle-cut!

        1. Steamweed

          So. That was _supposed_ to be “pubic hair”. But I think right now, Joyce-in-no-pants is public hair too.

    3. Bash

      That’s the joke here.

    4. Rose by Any other Name

      Fully disagree.
      “whoopsiepoodle” is not sexy and makes me giggle, but it is not a turnoff. At worst, it is comically neutral and worthy of fond teasing.

      “Virtue” is full on gross. It attempts to value a woman by her genitals, it holds inexperience up as a positive trait on par with compassion or charity, and it implies that any positive actions she takes can be undone via an intimate personal decision.

      I’ll take silly over gross any day of the week.

      1. BorkBorkBork

        For some strange weird reason, my brain doesn’t go there when I think of “virtue.” It kind of goes a bit superhero, Avengers/Justice League-esque – like “Virtue Vagina! Defender of the Innocent, Protector of Justice, Slayer of the One-Eyed Serpent!”

        Either that, or Dungeons and Dragons. The Hoo-Hah of Virtue, sounds like something you’d find in a chest next to a Deck of Many Things or a Bag of Holding.

        On the flipside, “whoopsiepoodle” sounds like something my daughter might have called it when she was seven, followed by a ton of giggles. Which is appropriate for that age, I suppose, but if we’re talking about euphamisms that are a turn off, that one has not only killed the mood that night, but also the mood’s family, friends, and next of kin.

  22. Amós Batista

    bottomless is my weakness

    1. Opus the Poet

      Naked apron it is…

      1. Steamweed

        Long as one is careful, naked cooking is hawt stuff.

        1. Schpoonman

          I don’t wear an apron at home, don’t even own one actually, but I’ve heard enough stories (and I’ve injured myself enough at work) to always wear clothing when cooking.

          I bet a naked apron would be discombobulating, though.

        2. thejeff

          Naked cooking is reasonable if you’re careful, but I’ve seen naked barbecuing and thats a bit much for me.

  23. IntangibleMatter

    Joyce, remember to not asking Carla if she’s had her “Whoopsiepoodle surgery”. That’s both incredibly confusing and incredibly rude

    1. Needfuldoer

      “The hell kind of mixed-breed dog is a ‘whoopsiepoodle’ and why are you worried if it’s been fixed?”

  24. Sirksome

    The answer really depends on what Joyce desires. Is she trying to use camouflage to break up the silhouette of her vag and throw off predators? Or does she want bright, contrasting colors to signal that it’s dangerous, poisonous, do not try eating this?

    1. StClair

      false eyespots are also an option.

    2. Taffy

      The latter is the exact opposite of what she’s after, so I think the real answer is “Just stay commando”

    3. Effie

      Joe definitely wants to try eating her whoopsiepoodle

    4. Shade

      I’m no expert on heterosexual sex, but I’m pretty do not eat this is the opposite signal you want to send.

      1. Taffy

        Although if the eating is literal and not just a euphemism for cunnilingus, probably definitely signal against it.

    5. Sirksome

      If the opposite effect is desired then perhaps instead Joyce should try luminescence. Bright light in contrast to a dark environment has proven in nature to attract and hypnotize prey. Maybe shiny and reflective decorations to impress with her ingenuity. A flashing light sequence can communicate she is adult female ready to mate.

      1. Taffy

        Bioluminescent women dancing in the dark with pulsing light patterns is something I didn’t know I needed. See y’all in a week.

    6. Steamweed

      I think she wants Joe to have the second option’s consumption. So let’s go with the first to ward off predation.

  25. JA

    I’m going to go against myself here and say orange stripes. Orange seems a more fitting color for Joyce.

  26. John Campbell

    Oh hey I get the hovertext reference. I would not have 24 hours ago.

    1. Risky

      I didn’t get it even though someone posted a link just slightly up the comment section from here. I had to google it just now and then saw the link above later, which meant I got the remix instead.

  27. Derek

    underwear includes a bra, is she wearing neither right now?

    1. Nymph

      Underwear does not always include a bra. Many women do not wear bras, or wear non-matched bras and panties.

    2. Steamweed

      We saw her put on a shirt, but that’s all we can assume she’s wearing atm. And…probably that’s Dotty’s exact thought right now.

    3. Yumi

      I tend to use underwear just to refer to underpants. Like, “bra and underwear” is a common enough phrasing, in my experience. So like, underwear can include a bra, but certainly doesn’t have to refer to both, and from context, it seems like they’re using it for specifically underpants.

  28. Derek

    at least she’s not calling it her maidenhead

    1. Rose by Any other Name

      I mean, on the icky terms for hymen, both virtue and maidenhead are pretty bad.

      1. Steamweed

        “Vise” is a better term than “Virtue”.
        (spelling deliberate)

        Instead of ‘maidenhead’ I would prefer ‘fountainhead’ except I hate it b/c the damn novel’s association.

        1. Taffy

          “Vise” is fuckin’ accurate, sometimes. Thank the Twelve for lube.

  29. mneme

    It’s pink stripes if you view the spaces between as white. It’s orange if you focus on other parts of the underwear.

    It’s the underwear equivalent to the blue/gold dress.

  30. Derek

    this also might bring up the question of whether Joyce shaves her bush or not. My money is on “no” unless her mom is the type of woman that considers shaving your legs, underarms and bikini line “basic hygiene for women”
    for the record, shaving is not more hygienic and an unshaven woman is not unkempt. I wish the choice to shave or not was politically neutral, but alas, women’s bodies are policed so much that having hairy armpits is somehow a huge statement

    1. Taffy

      I’m willing to bet she at least trims it.

    2. Rose by Any other Name

      Fully agree – there is nothing unhygienic about it. It’s basically the same as having a beard.

      And what I mean by that is itchy and prone to getting everywhere. Also, pubic hair can chafe during tribadism or get caught in the teeth during cunnilingus.

      1. Rose by Any other Name

        (In case I wasn’t clear, I’m saying that, while it is perfectly hygienic, there are still many personal grooming reasons why a person might wish to shave their pubic hair specifically, and not just for looks)

      2. Taffy

        Yeah, if you’re gonna scissor somebody, it’s just common courtesy not to rub your steel wool bush against their sensitive parts. I’ll also back the cunnilingus part. It can really fuck with your rhythm if you have to pick a hair out.

    3. Steamweed

      Other Patreon (damnyouwillis69) recent pictures indicate Joyce trims (but keeps most of) her pubic hair.

  31. Ninjazaku

    The chances of this not ending in disaster for Dorothy are growing slimmer by the second

  32. emeraldbeacon

    I’m worried that Joyce is going to pick up on Dorothy’s awkwardness, then, worried about her friend, will ask Joe about it. Joe will refrain from spilling the beans, saying it’s Dorothy’s story to tell… but THAT will only make Joyce think it’s a Joe+Dorothy situation, and make everything start disintegrating…

    1. OngoingConversation

      That … is eerily likely. I can definitely see it happening. Which sucks, because Joyce and Joe genuinely seem likely to a good couple. Also, poor Dorothy in that situation. Hasn’t she struggled enough by now?

      1. Effie

        Has anyone really EVER struggled “enough?”

        (I mean this is Dumbing of Age)

  33. darkoneko

    I’m surprised you even own stripped undies, Joyce.

    1. NGPZ

      wat is there some weird fundie prejudice against strips of which i am not aware? XD

      1. Clif

        I think the concern is less the striping of undies and more the stripping of undies.

        1. Opus the Poet

          +1! (thumbs up emoji)

        2. Steamweed

          +1 internet point

    2. Akane

      We’ve seen them before, and we’ve seen Dorothy’s striped pink panties. Hmmm…
      They both have the lesbian pride color in their underwear.

  34. Francoinblanco

    Joyce stop signaling your virtue without consent

    1. Nymph

      …what?

    2. Taffy

      Okay, I get the virtue signaling wordplay. That part’s solid, no notes. Can you elaborate on the consent part? I’d like to fully understand your joke.

    3. Steamweed

      I’m interping the “without consent” as Joyce being sans-pants right now. (assuming she’s wearing only that shirt we saw her put on)

  35. Woop de doop

    It’s just underpants. For chrissakes joyce.

    1. Taffy

      It’s not “just” underpants for her, though. It’s the underpants she’s gonna be wearing right before the first time she has sex. That doesn’t have to be significant to you, but certainly you can understand it is for others.

    2. Thomas

      This. It’s just underwear, Joyce. You’ll be taking it off anyway. Sex is not about the colour of your panties. It doesn’t matter.

      …is certainly an opinion we’re allowed to voice. Even if other people have a different experience. Some kind of paraphilia perhaps. We should be understanding.

      1. Taffy

        I mean, with that logic, she may as well not care if the bed is comfortable, if the lighting is right, if her partner is someone she cares about at all, if the building is currently on fire, or if Melancholia is about to collide with Earth.

        1. Yumi

          If the building is on fire, you should probably care about that. The rest of it fits because you definitely don’t have to care about it, but it makes sense that people do.

          That was my takeaway from Melancholia, anyway.

        2. Taffy

          I took a few things away from that movie. One was that the brother-in-law was a weak little coward. Another was that if your life is constantly unsatisfying and you can’t see an escape, be Kirsten Dunst about it and lay on a riverbank with your tits out.

        3. Steamweed

          If a cataclysm capable of breaking the actual planet is imminent, oh, yes, we should all be wearing as little or much as we want.

      2. Nadamás

        Well good to see you are as condescending and weird as ever.

        1. Thomas

          Yes, Nadamás. I understand it is wrong to have a different opinion. That can be hurtful to others. Even if they’re cartoon characters in a webcomic. Nice of you to call me weird, though. I never extended that courtesy to you. I’m flattered.

        2. Nadamás

          The fact you called experiences apart from yours a “paraphilia” really tells me you don’t really give much of a shit about about allowing different opinions, besides as a way of making yourselves the victim of some kind of I don’t know, mod mentality or something?

        3. Nymph

          Do you ~not~ believe that some people have a seriously creepy level of fascination with panties (paraphilia)? Because I’ve spent long enough on the internet and existing in the world to tell you that you’re sadly wrong.

          Thomas didn’t say “everyone who cares about the color of their panties is being a creep about it”, they said “Some kind of paraphilia, perhaps.” As in “this is one option for why someone might care too much about this mostly frivolous thing”.

          I don’t agree with their opinion that the outfit doesn’t matter right down to the panties when it’s an occasion you want to remember all the details of, but I didn’t feel attacked in the same way you seem to have. Maybe check in with yourself about that.

        4. Thomas

          I understand paraphilia as something that can occur in relatively mild variants. I think everyone to some level has responses to clothes worn by their intimate partners. Certain colours, textures, a good fit. So, in that sense, Joyce is right. She worries too much about it, but it matters on some level.

          I do not think paraphilia is in itself wrong or creepy. Disturbing variants occur, of course. (Thinking about the Japanese guy who dissects sex dolls. Something is definitely not right there.) But if you have a fascination for say, high heels or leather pants, that’s understandable even if I don’t have the same reaction to those items.

        5. Nymph

          I was using the strict definition of the word Paraphilia, since I don’t encounter the word often enough to have a colloquial understanding of it. I think you just meant “fetish” if that’s the vibe you were going for, but either way it doesn’t matter to me.

        6. Thomas

          A fetish »is« a paraphilia. But since paraphilia encompasses so much more & most of it is not about objects, I »do« think I meant to say fetish. Sorry about the confusion. I think it’s a really mundane thing that exists in every relationship at some level.

        7. Nymph

          Again, fair enough. I was just using the literal definition I looked up. And no worries on the confusion.

        8. Nadamás

          I fail to see how the existence panty fetish in general have much relevance. I just find strange they being that up specifically as the only example of why someone would disagree with their opinion. I don’t hold Thomas on good faith due to a series of comments bu them a few days ago, maybe that is wrong of me but I can’t help it. I didn’t fell “attacked” as much as annoyed, maybe you are right and I should check on with myself and not care but I am not sorry for saying what I think.

        9. Thomas

          Without sarcasm, I *do* think on some level, having a different opinion is hurtful to others. After all, it’s a form of rejection. I’m certain that hurts a tiny bit. We’d then like to get back at others to make them feel the same way. Which is a cycle that keeps reinforcing itself.

          Internet discussions don’t *have* to be personal, but they *can* feel that way to some of us. (Excepting the truly toxic attacks on people’s identities, of course. Those are personal by design.) I hope you can see this as a vindication of your feelings, Nadamás.

        10. Nymph

          The relevance would be: this is a comments section for a comic where panties and sexual situations are the current topic. Specifically, whether a certain kind of panty is preferrable to another.

          I think panty fetishes are high up on the list of relevant topics, personally. Right up there with color preferences, expectations for a “first time”, and whether or not Dorothy and Joyce are gonna bang.

        11. Nymph

          I don’t know Thomas, so your feelings on them personally aren’t something I care about. I was just engaging with you about what you specifically said here about the comic and the comment Thomas made. If you wanna debate the motivations of a total stranger with me, I’d prefer to pick someone more interesting.

          Maybe Pedro Pascal?

        12. Taffy

          When in doubt, defaulting to Pedro Pascal isn’t a bad option for most scenarios. Can’t decide on a movie? Pick the first one you find with Pedro Pascal in it. Artist block? Draw Pedro Pascal naked. Looking to buy a car? Pick the one you can see yourself driving on your romantic two-person road trip with Pedro Pascal. Forgot to do your taxes? Steal Pedro Pascal’s identity.

          For legal reasons, some of those suggestions are jokes.

        13. Nymph

          Which ones are jokes because all of that sounds very important and legal and needed in my life. Join me on a heist to STEAL PEDRO PASCAL.

        14. Yumi

          In light of the other day, I did question Thomas’ motive and attitude in the initial comment. On it’s own, I’d just have a different opinion and maybe find the second paragraph a little strange.

        15. Taffy

          What are you even talking about? Thomas is usually a pretty level-headed poster with decent stuff to say. You’d know that if you’d been around more than a few days. Starting to think your 4-year Platinum Club card might be forged.

        16. Thomas

          It’s nice of you to defend me, when we had a pretty ugly altercation a few days back. I’m genuinely touched. Please don’t start swearing again.

        17. Taffy

          You have no idea how badly I want to swear at you now, just to do it. I won’t though, to be polite.

          Did we have an altercation the other day? I don’t recall any specifics.

        18. Thomas

          Much appreciated, thank you. Of course it’s hard to recollect! I know, right? You must have so much going on, interacting in all those different threads.

        19. Taffy

          It’s really funny to read that last sentence sarcastically, like a “Oh yeah, you’ve sure got a busy life, with how constantly you post. ?” kinda meme. Especially if you didn’t mean it that way, because then I’m corrupting your goodwill.

        20. Thomas

          It gives you an out for not remembering every detail, don’t you think? The “much” that you have going on, are the different threads you’re contributing to. I truly meant it in that sense, even if I’m only superficially friendly with you.

    3. Nerrin

      It’s about the presentation. The moment of revelation. The anticipation.

  36. HueSatLight

    I wonder if Golgotha is just unupdated background or if she’s hesitant to take it down.

    1. Taffy

      The only Golgotha I know about is the G-Virus from Resident Evil, and I see no evidence of a classic PS1 in the scene, so I can only assume Golgotha has something to do with those three crosses on the orange poster or something I can’t recognize on the blue one.

      1. Dark_T_Zeratul

        Yes, it’s the three crosses.

        Golgotha was the hill that Jesus was crucified on, with two thieves alongside him.

        1. Taffy

          Is this one of those situations where the other two guys get elaborate back stories in the prequel, or are they just random stealboys?

        2. Clif

          Yes, one of those.

        3. HueSatLight

          There’s a lot of fanfic about them, most of it ahistorical. The Roman Empire didn’t crucify people for theft, it crucified non-citizens for insurrection.

  37. PB

    First of all, Joyce is not helping Dorothy sort this out.

    And second, go with orange to match the shirt

    1. Taffy

      Joyce is being an amazing friend right now, by not volunteering help Dorothy hasn’t asked her for.

  38. BBCC

    Yeah, DOROTHY, pick one!

    1. Clif

      What? Sight unseen. For accuracy she should compare them in sutu.

      For Science!

      1. Hof1991

        Yes. Blind Dorothy with science.

        1. Effie

          or blind her with your whoopsiepoodle

  39. Kyulen

    I’m not sure which is a worse euphemism for a woman’s genitals, “virtue” or “whoopsiepoodle”. Both sound ridiculously bad.

    1. Taffy

      At least “virtue” has the same first letter, I suppose.

      1. Disastroid

        Call it a virtua fighter

        1. Taffy

          Call it a Vib Ribbon

        2. Nymph

          Voltron

        3. Steamweed

          Stick a bunch of them together and it forms something more powerful?

        4. Taffy

          Joyce should consult SierraMandyGrace about such a maneuver. Then we can finally see them turn into a giant woman.

        5. Steamweed

          Waiting for _that_ sketch on damnyouwillis69.

    2. Zaxares

      In all honesty though, I feel like Joyce can call it whatever the hell she wants. While I do see Dorothy’s point in that certain words do come with a lot of baggage, if it’s just going to be Joyce’s (and maybe Joe’s?) personal name/pet name for it, I don’t see how it’s anybody’s business what they want to call it.

      1. Nymph

        Other than the fact that Joyce is specifically asking for advice from Dorothy and that was part of it, sure.

  40. Freezer

    I don’t think I’ve ever seen orange panties, striped or otherwise. Bloomers on a costume or uniform, sure.

    1. Anon

      i guess it depends on where you buy it from but yeah more likely a ‘peach’ or light coral versus vibrant orange , tho i’d half expect the results to be like an orange (the fruit) pattern or so versus something vivid

      maybe something halloween themed too but other than ‘sexy’ pairs i’d expect it to be more ‘common’ for young girls/young adults to have like a ‘rainbow pack’ of panties when thye get a multipack

  41. Envy

    So is Joyce just coochie out or is she freeballing(freeflapping?) some jeans right now

    1. chrisashtear

      Straight donald ducking

    2. Steamweed

      We saw her put on a shirt. We can’t assume anything else.
      (and dotty’s brain is currently bsod-ing over that image)

  42. Arianod

    Being Dorothy is suffering…

  43. Rabisch

    Joyce is right. That’s not the important thing right now. But Dorothy will be surely distracted by that.

  44. Zamperla

    ….Whoopsiepoodle…..

  45. Alan in DC

    Wait til he reveals his Long John Tallywacker before you reveal your Whoopsiepoodle.
    Or your Chalumbas.
    Hahaha, I haven’t thrown those words around since I was 12

    1. Steamweed

      Liz from QC sees your term ‘chalumbas’, and raises you with ‘jojombas’ and ‘hombojombos’.

      1. NickG

        Not forgetting Pintsize’s ‘tijubas’

        1. Steamweed

          A cunning linguistic masterpiece! A perfectly performing portmanteau!

      2. Schpoonman

        I was just thinking of “TITTIES” and “Put me in your cleavage, I’ll ride you like a power loader,” this morning.

  46. Suet

    If your Virtue is named Chastity, we need to huddle up.

    Orange? Pink? What are we, Starbursts? Just go red— hold on, will they even get to that point

  47. CJ

    Pink obviously

  48. Thomas O.

    Book 15: Before Joe Sees My Whoopsiepoodle

  49. Tenkiforecast

    You know, given the lyrics, the song Dorothy could have picked could have been from the Christian Rock episode of South Park where they had cartman replace the lyrics of a bunch of love songs with ‘Jesus’

    The one I remember:
    ‘I want to get down on my knees and start praising [Joyce], I want to feel [her] salvation all over my face!’

    1. Anon

      I can totally imagine walky singing those songs just to bother joyce

  50. V98

    Pink stripes… orange stripes… lesbian flag colors…. foreshadowing??????

    1. Taffy

      Joyce Brown’s Ominous Lesbian Panties, available wherever books are sold. Now you can enjoy it in audiobook form, narrated by Sir Patrick Stewart and John Malkovich.

      1. Astariel

        I’d get that audiobook.

        1. Taffy

          The important question now becomes, do they voice different characters or do they narrate simultaneously, Gogeta-style?

        2. V98

          They alternate words.

      2. Makkabee

        “Being Jean-Luc Malkovich” — Patrick Stewart possesses John Malkovich and forces him to quit acting and become a full-time flautist.

  51. Steamweed

    1. Orange shirt, so orange stripe underwear. Natural fit.
    2. From ‘virtue’ to ‘whoopsiedoodle’. Soon we can segue Joyce to such increasingly targeted terms as ‘hoohah’, ‘vaginator’, and then ‘vaj’. A helpful linguistic progression for her education.

  52. Astariel

    Okay, alt-text, if you insist. I guess pink stripes.

    1. Astariel

      Also, is that a picture of Dorothy next to Joyce’s cheek in panel 3?

      1. HueSatLight

        Yes, the one by her desk.

        1. HueSatLight

          https://www.dumbingofage.com/worldly-vices/ also seen here.

  53. Pat

    Pink, unless Joe is also a self-insert for Willis, in which case things are about to get very confusing.

    1. Taffy

      No no, the idea is that Joe will insert himself into Joyce. ?

      1. RassilonTDavros

        With his penis.

        (my usual Grav is horribly inappropriate for this joke, so let’s see how well or poorly I roll the roulette)

        1. RassilonTDavros

          Slightly less awkward I guess?

  54. HueSatLight

    Joe and Dorothy are pink-orange colorblind, following an incident of contaminated Tropicana pink juice in their hometown.

  55. Adept

    Surely no-one anywhere calls anything a whoopsiepoodle.

  56. JWK

    What kind of a scene is Joe going to walk in on? (Of course he’s gonna “walk in.” It wouldn’t be a romcom if he didn’t walk in on something!)

  57. SvenTS

    The Many Temptations of Dorothy

  58. S.R.

    Joyce, I have a feeling he’s not going to care.

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