127

Uninvolved
Posted on September 28, 2018 by David M Willis
Tomorrow and Sunday I'm going to be at Cartoon Crossroads Columbus, here in Columbus, Ohio, at table 6!  CXC is at the Columbus Metropolitan Library downtown, and admission to the event is free!  Come say hellos.

127 thoughts on “Uninvolved”

  1. Doctor_Who

    “Too soon” is not in Lucy’s lexicon. Her brain is on book twelve of the Walkerton Cycle (complete with Netflix original series and upcoming theme park) and has fast-forwarded to the point where she’s naming Walky’s grandchildren.

    Considering the rate at which time passes in this comic, she’s literally living in the year 3000.

    1. cbwroses

      Now I really want to read a fantasy series called The Walkerton Cycle

      1. butts

        The Age of Dumbing

        1. Doctor_Who

          Sir Walker Tonne of House Read will quest for the Potion of Many Dews, with only his mithril pajama jeans and pouch of fifty golden nuggets to aid him. But first he must solve the riddle eternal: Be that savory tortilla dish, or posterior?

        2. MatthewTheLucky

          Forsooth, ’tis both.

        3. Zach

          If you were a busker, I would be giving you money

        4. cbwroses

          And Lo, in the time before fast food, during an era the world wanted to forget, there was Walky.
          Beige of skin and face of Jerk, he strolled through the Halls of Read and Forest of Quad, leaving a trail of goofiness and snark beneath his unlaced boot.
          Attempting to navigate the hallowed institutions of learning, he seemingly let nothing faze him, only fearing bad test grades and talking about his feelings.
          So began the Age of Dumbing. This is The Walkerton Cycle.

        5. Clif

          Conan and Rand would both be jealous. Well done.

        6. cbwroses

          Thanks for that.

      2. wrog

        the Walkeriad

    2. C.

      You’re mentioned on Lucy’s T-shirt.

      1. Doctor_Who

        How do you think she got to the year 3000? Girl owes me a favor, little cross promotion never hurt.

    3. SgtWadeyWilson

      I’m sure she’ll be fine. I hear not much has changed, but we live underwater.

  2. Sporky

    Even considering her fuckup, Lucy has already given way better romantic advice than Billie has given (or possibly could ever give).

    1. newllend(henryvolt)

      Okay to some things up her advice is pretty much ” if you are still in love with your ex then maybe one day if it’s in the cards she’ll come back to you, but until then don’t wait around and mope try going out and find someone new maybe you’ll be happier with them or they’ll help you grow a bit. Either way don’t dwell on what was when there’s so many future options out there.”

      That’s me trying to make sense of it considering what you said in the last panel of the last strip

  3. Stephen Bierce

    Hey! (Hey!) You! (You!) Get Off Of My Cloud!
    Hey! (Hey!) You! (You!) Get Off Of My Cloud!
    Hey! (Hey!) You! (You!) Get Off Of My Cloud!
    Don’t hang around ’cause two’s a crowd!

    1. cbwroses

      You don’t know me and you don’t know my style!

  4. ShinyNeen

    You know, I don’t think anybody’s just straight-up told Walky he’s a good person since the breakup. I mean, he’s gotten plenty of other sympathy, but there’s something refreshing about Lucy just straight up telling him he’s good.

    I mean, yes, it’s platitudes from a stranger, and Walky likely wouldn’t listen even if he was hearing this from someone he respected, but on some level it’s still nice to see.

    1. cbwroses

      You have a point. The only one who ever tells him he’s a decent guy is Dorothy, and he doesn’t really believe her because 1. he thinks he’s garbage, and 2. she’s so nice that he thinks she’d say it regardless.

  5. Tacos

    You’re all nerds. Why don’t all y’all get off the bed then?

  6. Wright

    Lucy is, by far, THE best DOA character and desperately needs her own miniseries. She and Joyce can travel across the country in a minivan, fighting crime or something.

    1. butts

      AS SPIDER-CAR

    2. Poskie

      I’d argue this webcomic displays some pretty good examples of why fighting crime is maybe a thing best left to non-vigilantes. ;P

      1. thejeff

        Maybe. It certainly doesn’t seem to be healthy for those doing it.

        OTOH, the vigilantes rescued Becky and tracked down Ryan and led to his being arrested (and gutted.) Arguably, they’re doing better than the non-vigilantes.

      2. Wright

        Point. How about solving mysteries, Scooby-Doo style?

    3. Deanatay

      “Walking With Dina II: Walking With Starfire”

      1. ShinyNeen

        The storyline opens like Walking with Dina, only replace all the dinosaur names with Lucy’s favorite ships.

        Once Joyce gets on panel the story goes completely off the rails.

    4. Amazi-Stool

      Title: Lucy in the Sky with Dumbings!

  7. Danielle

    billie’s platitude is perfect

  8. DailyBrad

    I love you, Lucy, but yeah, you’re out of your depth. At least she’s recognizing that her platitudes are coming up short here.

    I’ll grant Walky this, though: getting advice from these two is still better than if he used yahoo answers and called it a day.

  9. butts

    my boundless wrath you have incurred;

    get off my bed, you fucking nerd

    1. Sol Karas

      I snorted.

    2. GenJen

      Can I get a throw pillow with this crochet on it?

      1. Danielle

        id like one too

      2. Regalli

        That would be one kickass cross-stitch.

    3. GenJen

      Okay, the more I think about it, the more I think i’m actually gonna commission a friend who actually knows how to do this, to do this.

    4. Tacos

      It’s times like these when I wish there was a like button.

    5. Chris Phoenix

      Sir Arthur Sullivan needs to have written the music that was sung in. Something like the final scene of Pirates of Penzance: “No Englishman unmoved that statement hears…”

    6. Deanatay

      THE BUTTS HAVE SPOKEN

  10. Bagge

    Heh, I love how Lucy is trying to be the nice&kind-hearted version of alpha bongo.

    …alpha sweetie?

    She tries very hard to listen, give advice, be there…. and is just a tad to nosy about it, makes it just a little bit too much about her own status as alpha sweetie (totally a thing) rather than about the person she tries to help.

    NOT ENTIRELY unlike both Dorothy and Joyce (“Joyce dresses everyone day”), and a pretty effective mirror to alpha bongo Billie

    Seen also here
    http://www.dumbingofage.com/2017/comic/book-8/02-this-is-the-way-that-we-love/sitch/

    1. Jamie

      I was wondering if you’d magically decide that Lucy’s boundary-pushing was more okay than Joyce’s only because Lucy.

      1. Bagge

        I can magically decide all sort of things – I’m magical like that 🙂

        For whatever it’s worth – I think both Lucy and Joyce (and Becky for that matter) are hilarious, but I’m pretty happy to be spared their attention by the fourth wall.

  11. GenJen

    Imma go against the train and agree with Billie on a few things here.

    1. Literally nobody asked Lucy for her opinion on this matter. Walky came to talk to his best friend, not get unsolicited advice from a stranger, no matter positively generic that advice may be. Walky doesn’t need someone to tell him there are other fish in the sea at this point. He needs someone to throw a blanket on the “no fishing” sign. Enter Billy.

    2. Yeah, Walky came to Billy because he already made his mind up, his talk with Sal kinda that. Sometimes we don’t always need “perspective”, sometimes we just really need outside acceptance.

    I don’t know, I think Billy’s take is refreshing, despite its bluntness, and Walky is lucky to have her there.

    1. Derek

      I’m with you on this one, Lucy is butting in where no one asked her

      1. Diner Kinetic

        Lucy is just a shipper from outside of the comic who somehow invaded that universe at the expense of dooming ours.

    2. Bagge

      I also think it’s worth noticing that Billie was spot on while Lucy was way off in addressing Walky’s specific situation.

      That said, a kind “It’ll be OK” is not the worst thing to say to a stranger. And as for permission, Lucy started with a question, thus giving Walky a chance to evade her attention.

      Either way, I really don’t think Walky mind – or care about – Lucy all that much.

    3. Sam

      It isn’t up to Billie to decide if her advice is unwelcome – Walky gets to decide that. And no matter what Billie thinks, she doesn’t get to order people into silence within their shared living space which isn’t a privacy bubble. Lucy wasn’t asked to give them space because it is a private matter and she doesn’t have to do what Billie says just because her overinflated ego says she’s the boss around here.

      Walky is the one who gets to say whose advice is unwelcome because it is his problem.

      1. GenJen

        1. There’s a difference between unwelcomed and unsolicited. Whether her butting in is unwelcomed is up for debate, especially since she completely missed the mark. But the word I used, “unsolicited”, is definitely what happened. Walky came to talk to Billy. Without any prompting from either of the people involved in that convo, Lucy decided to give her advice. Thus, unsolicited. It’s within Lucy’s right as a roommate to ask Billy to move the conversation elsewhere if it is bothering her. That’s pretty much it.

        2. Yeah, Billy can’t tell her to leave the room, or even be quiet. Billy can tell her to get off her bed and mind her own business though. Sharing a common space doesn’t mean you automatically get to insert yourself into the other persons personal life. Lucy has boundary issues and being nice doesn’t make okay. Granted, Billy should know by now that there was no way Lucy wasn’t gonna but in, but still.

  12. Dana

    Dumbing of Age book 9: Get off my bed, you fucking nerd.

    1. stoodmuffin

      Please

    2. neeks

      Idk, “my platitude train has runaway inertia” has a nice ring to it for a DoA book title.

  13. BBCC

    I love Lucy isn’t just a sitcom, its a fact of my life.

    1. stoodmuffin

      <3

    2. Keulen

      *plays the I Love Lucy theme on the hacked muzak*

    3. Bagge

      Heh, nice

  14. Deadjolras

    Lucy, you lovely ray of sunshine, please never leave us.

    1. stoodmuffin

      Agreed

  15. stoodmuffin

    Is it bad I want this to be a new friend threesome? Platonic threesome?
    Three, bud, group.

    Three musketeers?

    Let’s go with that one.

    A friend trio.

    Of Besties. And Bffls.

    1. thejeff

      Hell, I think I’m shipping Walky and Lucy.
      Probably not enough drama potential, but hey.

      1. ShinyNeen

        Nah, it’s cool, Walky can take a drama break. I’d be okay with that!

      2. BBCC

        I mean, he’s sorta dating Amber and rebounding from Dorothy. That’s plenty drama.

  16. Jaymie

    Wait a bloody minute. Is Lucy’s shirt a Doctor Who shirt that actually quotes Darkwing Duck?!?

    1. Belegcam

      Yes, and I am now annoyed that I didn’t come up with that idea and make tens of dollars off it.

      1. Ed Rhodes

        Shut up and take my pennies!

    2. RacingTurtle

      It is a *great* shirt.

    3. Kaidah

      I knew that was a Darkwing Duck shirt. Embarrassed to admit I missed the Doctor Who reference though.

  17. jeffepp

    Is it just me, or did it seem likely that Lucy’s hand was gonna slide down off his shoulder, to his chest. Until the face palm, that is.

  18. Keulen

    Help! The 4th panel has me kinda sorta considering shipping Lucy and Walky.

  19. BenRG

    I suspect that it is an overwhelming shock to Billie that someone with a different perspective to her might offer good advice. I also suspect that she’ll be sore annoyed if Lucy’s advice works for Walky!

    1. King Daniel

      What “advice”? The entire joke here is that Lucy’s advice said that Walky would have another SO soon, only for Walky to reply that already having that was the whole reason he had come here.

      1. Sam

        While part of it wasn’t perfect, saying ‘it’s okay, you’re a thoughtful and attractive person, there are plenty of other people that will like you’ isn’t wrong and is also something no one else has bloody said to Walky and that Billie never would have said to Walky.

        1. BenRG

          In Billie’s defence, that isn’t the sort of thing one says to a sort-of-sibling-by-choice. There is a certain common expectation that you maintain a ‘friendly’ level of adversarial relations in that sort of relationship!

        2. Sam

          I don’t know about you, but if any of my friends regardless of how close came to me for advice, I would put any banter away to try to give them my best advice. Billie in general has just never been the best person to Walky regardless.

        3. the final pam

          “You’ll find someone else” actually isn’t that great of advice, though. What if Walky didn’t find someone else? If it took him months or years or decades even before he found someone else to date? What if he never wanted to find someone else? Not everyone wants a romantic connection or relationship, and the assurance that no worries, you’ll get that monogamous relationship again is actually rather flaccid. It’s a nice sentiment, but it’s a nice, generic, toothless sentiment that has actually nothing to do with Walky’s own feelings or his problems. Telling someone who’s hurting over their ex that they’ll just find someone new doesn’t take the hurt away. Telling someone who’s lost a pet that they can just get a new one doesn’t fix the pain.

          Just because it’s presented nicely and sweetly doesn’t mean it’s any good.

        4. BBCC

          I’d say in this case that Walky is pretty clearly wanting romantic connections (since he’s still sad over one ending, it would imply he wanted it to continue), but I don’t think saying he can find someone else some day is a bad thing. And while Walky’s hurting over Dorothy right now, the problem is here for is that he’s worried about hurting Dorothy’s feelings over Amber.

        5. the final pam

          True, Walky wants romantic connections, but was he necessarily wanting one right after the end of his relationship with Dorothy? Was he wanting anyone other than Dorothy? He and Amber kind of just happened, completely unplanned on the part of either of them. He had a very short window of time to grieve the loss of his relationship before starting a new one, and that’s clearly bothering him. He’s not “oh, I’ll never love again, I’ll never find someone again”, it’s “Dorothy deserved better than me and I’ve already started dating someone else”

          That’s why I’m saying the advice is generic and toothless and overall useless. It’s just a flaccid statement with no guarantee that’s just supposed to make him feel better in the most generic way. Lucy even acknowledged it as that by calling it a platitude. It’s ultimately meaningless. What Lucy said to Walky has nothing to do with his problem. She heard half of what he said and offered him something that’s ultimately just a load of fluff. He already has found someone else- that’s the entire problem.

        6. BBCC

          Lucy wasn’t urging him to have a new relationship before then, so his reaction immediately post break up doesn’t really matter here. Lucy’s reacting to what he’s saying now – which actually seems to be the problem. She first told Billie not to give Walky a hard time for trying to navigate Dorothy’s potential broken heart about Amber (not knowing she dumped him) and then she responded to Walky saying he wasn’t good enough for Dorothy. It’s true, it’s not connected to his problem with Amber, but she acknowledged that, so I’m not sure what she should do now.

  20. Badgermole

    I still sort of ship Walky and Dorothy because they’re genuinely good for each other more than they are for other past or potential partners. Having said that, you’re right Walky, she deserves better.

  21. Darkoneko

    Man I hate platitudes

    1. Clif

      That’s multitudes of Platypi right?

      1. Darkoneko

        Yes.

  22. Jimi

    Man, I’m not a fan of this current Billie arc. I don’t really understand where it’s going. *Everything else* going on in this strip lately, including Walky’s situation, has been just so god damn amazing. Brilliant writing all around. But where I gleefully accept how unrealistically mean Mike can be, for some reason I’ve always had a lot of trouble accepting the unrealism of Billie’s hall’s cartoonish personalities, which then makes me have a hard time accepting her completely forgetting everything she just learned. It just feels wrong. Like the opposite of catharsis.

    1. Ainara

      I actually like Billie’s storyline and have no trouble accepting how cartoonish her hallmates are (thought I understand why other people do), but it’s funny to come up with theories for in-universe reasons why they’re like that

      something something androids

    2. BBCC

      I don’t think Billie really learned that her worth doesn’t lie in social status. I think she was just trying to deal with not having it. Now that she has it, yep, she’s having a lot of fun basking in it and wants to keep it as long as possible.

  23. Beef

    Sometime bugs me about what Walky said. So he’s “obviously” not good enough for Dorothy, but he is for Amber? Shouldn’t that be a red flag?

    1. newllend(henryvolt)

      He really likes Amber but he’s still in love with Dorothy. With time maybe and that’s a MAYBE he’ll be able to take the rose colored glasses off and see Dorothy isn’t Pitch Perfect as he thought and/or he’ll be able to find out something about Amber to appreciate. Again they just hooked up the day before so of course one of them are going to have reservations about it and of course one of them who just got dumped a few days ago hasn’t tooken down their EX from her mantle yet.

      But more importantly what’s wrong with being in a relationship where two people see each other as their equal instead of one putting the other on top of a pedestal?

      1. Regalli

        I lost an entire lengthy comment, but: Normally I would say yes, seeing each other as equals is a fantastic and necessary part of a relationship.

        The problem is that Walky and Amber both have massive self-esteem issues and see themselves as equally GARBAGE, and their relationship currently has them reinforcing to each other that yep, we are both terrible people instead of ‘There is at least one person who doesn’t think you’re terrible and maybe we can try and feel less terrible together’.

        (This dynamic is also present in Ruth/Billie, though lessening on Ruth’s part. It is EXTREMELY WORRYING there, too. I actively worry about Billie because she is definitely Not Okay and not seeking help.)

        I really think in another time, Amber and Walky could be great together. But not with this massive web of secrets of Amber’s hanging over them, and not unless they start feeling like maybe they could be Less Garbage.

        1. newllend(henryvolt)

          Them helping each other to be less garbage is what I’m hoping for, like they say first step to addressing a problem is admitting you have one. Besides we can’t really say every couple in DoA started off on the best terms.

        2. Regalli

          Yeah, but I think the secretbomb will destroy them first.

          Also the fact that Amber’s lead-in to the kiss was ‘sure you might feel like garbage for moving on too quickly, who cares? Let’s be garbage’ just reinforces the garbage-ness Walky was already feeling for liking Amber so soon after Dorothy.

          I mean, if they weren’t TRANSPARENTLY DOOMED I would maybe have hope, but Amber’s keeping two active secrets that bear directly on Walky’s life, one of which could get him expelled, plus the dissociation thing. Hiding that Amber stabbed Sal during the robbery and that she and AG are separated to the point they no longer share memories will only make things worse when they do inevitably come out, and the latter one will probably ‘come out’ in the worst possible fashion. The grades thing is gonna get him rightfully pissed because she did it with him asking her not to, and since it’s still pre-midterms it jeopardizes them both for NOTHING. Even if he takes the Sal thing well (and neither he nor Sal is obligated to,) there’s so much here straining not to be revealed that they’re all either going to cascade and overwhelm or Walky will be upset she told one truth and hid others.

      2. Beef

        Well of course they should see each other as equals but that should always be the default. Just in my experience when person A talks about person B being out of their league but thinks person C is just fine that means that person A is using person C’s flaws to justify being with them despite their own shortcomings. I hope that made sense

  24. Chris Phoenix

    Panel 4 Lucy looks more than a little like Dorothy, in expression, dress, and body language. And she’s telling Walky how dateable he is. (And Billie has diagnosed her as being nerdy.)

    I ship it!

    1. Bagge

      AND compare to Dorothy’s behaviour when she’s spreadsheeting.

      Screw it, I ship Dorothy and Lucy

  25. FacelessDeviant

    Take thy platitude train from out my friend, and take thy form from off my fucking bed!”
    Quoth the Roomate “Nevermore.”

  26. Emily

    So far the score on relationship advice is like Lucy 0 Billie -18 because while Lucy’s advice is useless Billie’s is actively terrible and detrimental if followed.

    1. Sam

      Lucy at least has complimented Walky and has thought to give the very simple advice that ‘it will be okay’. Which is a million times better than Billie’s advice which has had like, tiny specks of a good idea in it… which are snuffed out by her presented execution e.g. focusing on yourself can be a good idea… doing so by pretending you don’t care about your ex and aren’t hurt at all not so much.

  27. Daisy

    Lucy really danned that one up.
    (I ship it.)

    1. Ainara

      oh god could you imagine

      1. Bagge

        Danny: “What are we going to do tonight, Lucy?”
        Lucy: “The same thing we do every night, Danny!”
        Both in chorus: “Whatever YOU want to do.”

        *Both stares at each other in silence for the rest of the evening – smiles never wavering, eyes never blinking*

        1. Roborat

          Wow, you threw me with that one. I thought you were building up to a Pinky and the Brain joke, and you completely changed direction. Still, nicely done.

        2. Bagge

          Well, I STARTED with a Pinky and the Brain Joke. No need to stick to one joke 🙂

        3. Daisy

          That is EXACTLY how it would go, until eventually one of them is forced to develop (dun dun DAAAAH) AGENCY :O:O:O:O:O

          at that point the comicverse collapses and Dina is the only survivor

  28. Ainara

    DEPLOYING GENERIC REASSURANCE BEEP BOOP

    1. BenRG

      Actually, I was kind of wondering how long Lucy had that speech memorised looking for someone to use it on!

      1. Bagge

        Heh, I’m 100% sure you hit the nail on that one. I bet she has practiced it, complete with the soft touch and reassuring eye contact.

        1. Amazi-Stool

          So another similarity with Joyce then?

          (Kinda foreshadowed by “Holy hell, it’s a white Lucy.”)

        2. Bagge

          Yup. Malaya tells it like it is.

  29. hof1991

    Love that Billie has totally lost control of the situation, one that she was sure she had in hand and under control.

  30. BBCC

    Also, unrelated, but the Kavanaugh vote is at 1:30 so any of you Americanites should call your senators and yell at them not to do the stupid thing.

    1. thejeff

      It looks like Flake might have thrown a last minute spanner in the works. It’s not quite clear what happened.

      1. Ryek Hvek

        the GOP Senators are gradually accepting the idea that voting in this schlub would be career suicide

        1. thejeff

          I’ve spend the whole last week flipping between “He’s toast” and “It’s a done deal” with every new piece of news. No idea what’s going to happen next.
          Call your Senators, especially if they’re any of the wavering Republicans (or maybe even Democrats.) Flake, Murkowski, Collins, Manchin. A few others might flip.

        2. Clif

          Because the next one nominated will be so much better. :-/

      2. BBCC

        Flake is a Republican judiciary member who hinted a lot at flipping and then said he’d vote for him last minute. He does that a lot – acts like he’s waffling and then votes the party line anyways. As for Manchin, his state went overwhelmingly for Trump so he has to pick his battles on what he will and won’t vote against if he wants to keep his seat and be able to vote against him at all.

        @ Ryek – Some are trading their careers for a lifetime appointee to the supreme court, others are trying to rally the GOP base with it, others haven’t quite cottoned on yet.

        1. BBCC

          Okay, so apparently the wrench is he said he wanted an FBI investigation before the floor vote. The procedural vote (i.e. vote on whether to vote, basically) is at 12:30 tomorrow. So definitely call and tell them to vote no, especially Flake, if this request isn’t fulfilled. (And tell them to vote no anyways, but the request thing comes first).

        2. Ryek Hvek

          the call for an investigation does allow for Flake, and other GOP fence-sitters to vote no, without being guilty of blatant party disloyalty

        3. BBCC

          Which is why it’s important to call and make sure he puts his money where his mouth is. I’ll be happy when they actually vote no.

        4. thejeff

          Trump has asked the FBI for a one-week investigation.
          Apparently the procedural vote* is still being held this weekend, but the actual vote is delayed until next Monday. So yeah, call. Especially if your Senator is on the fence.

          Basically Flake (who was also the reason Dr. Ford got a hearing at all) bought a week and an investigation. Who knows what they’ll find and what will come to light from other sources, but there’s little chance this is going to look any better for them a week from now. OTOH, it’s another week for GOP arm-twisting.

          *Cloture vote, what used to end a filibuster, but now just takes the same simple majority as the actual vote for reasons

  31. Mancuso

    I’m 50 years old and one of the favorite times in my day is the moment of anticipation between finishing to read the strip and clicking on the comment section. This place is the anti-Youtubeverse.

    1. Bagge

      <3

  32. abysswatcher1993

    These situations aren’t fanfictions, Lucy!

    1. Bagge

      Isn’t that right, Amber?
      http://www.dumbingofage.com/2014/comic/book-5/01-when-somebody-loved-me/blessing/

      1. Bagge

        Isn’t that right, Joyce?
        http://www.dumbingofage.com/2011/comic/book-2/01-pajama-jeans/gross/

        1. Bagge

          JOYCE!!!?? Do you even listen to me?
          http://www.dumbingofage.com/2015/comic/book-6/01-to-those-whod-ground-me/scenarios/

  33. hueloovoo

    Holy fuck, Lucy is my alternate universe self! 100% me in a different physical representation.

  34. Nenja

    English is not my mother tongue but usually I understand everything fine. Today I actually had to use google so I could understand what ‘platitude’ and ‘inertia’ is.

    1. Bagge

      This comic is educational

  35. Rowen Morland

    Ugh, Lucy was an actual person for exactly one panel.

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