I’m not crying, no, I’m not crying
And if I am crying, it’s not because of you
It’s because I’m thinking about a friend of mine
You don’t know who is dying, that’s right, dying
These aren’t tears of sadness because you’re leaving me
I’ve just been cutting onions, I’m making a lasagna for one
Pretty sure Sarah would not be accepting of hugs right now.
Introverts who no longer trust people are not huggers.
Yet_One_More_Idiot
I am an introvert, and I can say that if somebody just really upset me with a random insulting outburst like Joyce just had, I would appreciate a big “I’m so sorry” hug by way of apology. :3
Ghola
I’d probably shake them off and tell them to let go of me, if I’m being honest. In varying degree’s of loudness.
I’ve been a Sarah, hugs would be.. not conductive right off. Maybe when opening a dialogue later, after the initial rage/sadness had bled off, hugs would be alright.
Glome the Gnome
I would only be ok with a hug if it was a close family member or friend that i have known for years. Not a roommate i have know for a few weeks.
Greenygal
Different people, different reactions. In this case, Sarah’s body language is about as unfriendly to overtures as it could be without her actually leaving the room; I wouldn’t try it if I were Joyce.
Yet_One_More_Idiot
I don’t think anybody else would dare to try it in this situation, but Joycy’s just the kind of gal who might. :3
Maybe by inviting Jacob? Not saying that would make everthing okay of course, but it might help a little.
Rich
Unless Jacob’s having second thoughts about breaking things off with Sarah, I can’t see where his presence is going to help much. Guess it’s possible, and him showing up with his roomie Ethan isn’t implausible. We know he doesn’t want to go to Roz’s party.
saki
Yeah I’m kinda hoping Jacob’s calmed down since the other day and is willing to talk things out… Maybe Joyce can advocate for Sarah a little, you know, convince him to give her a chance… But this is all just wishful thinking of mine.
timemonkey
Maybe she’ll explain WHY Sarah is pissed at Amazi-Girl and WHY she suddenly felt bad about laughing at Joyce’s naivite? I mean, if she won’t tell Becky herself but she does to make it up to Sarah that’s a pretty strong message to Sarah.
Orbit Junkie
There’s also the possibility that Joyce doesn’t know about her argument with Jacob, and will invite him as an apology, making the party even MORE awkward.
Greenygal
Joyce knows something happened, although not what exactly. Pretty sure she’s not clueless enough to just invite him and hope all will be well.
Orbit Junkie
Sorry, I forgot about that one.
bodmans
But what about ”Other Jacob”?
Screwball
Buzz is he’ll be around, but unlikely to make an appearance till after it’s over. Tends to happen like that with Other-Jacob…
She is very scared and is trying to do the right thing by her friend, and she doesn’t know how to help. Sarah is responding to the situation by trying to remind Joyce of the uncomfortable truths that Joyce is already well aware of.
Joyce responded with a snappish thing that she instantly regretted and apologized for. Didn’t even go “I just was” x or “I only meant” y or “You make me so angry that” n+1. Just straight up flat out took responsibility and apologized.
Sarah is bitter and disillusioned, and part of getting back to being a functional human being is NOT putting the wall up and saying shit that you know is going to make the other person feel even worse. And that’s not something she’s good at, because she got VERY badly burned with her old roommate and the people surrounding her. I can’t blame her for being in pain, but we’ve sorta proven time and again that her way of responding to the pain is to lash out at people who want to be there for her. She is the person you cannot apologize to, not because she won’t believe you mean it, but because she won’t care.
If Joyce had said something hateful, something intended to hurt, hell, even something just naive and bigoted and didn’t apologize for it, I’d be right along with you. But right now, Joyce is a scared little girl who is in a darker place than she has EVER been, because she is not only confronting the fact that everything she thought was good came from a perspective of hate, she’s also dealing with, you know, the fact she was fucking assaulted.
Yeah. I’m on Joyce’s side. I respect Sarah’s side, because she’s dealing with a hell of a lot of shit herself, but the fact of the matter is that Sarah is upset enough to say cruel things because of her OWN feelings, and Joyce is upset enough to say cruel things because she’s trying to take care of other people’s feelings.
Neither of them is right, but neither of them deserve not to enjoy a party. So NYEAH.
Greenygal
Huh? Sarah was absolutely trying to take care of other people’s feelings; that’s how this whole conversation started. “Being around you is painful for Becky; she needs space.” And for this expression of concern, Joyce attacked her in the most sensitive spot she’s got. It wasn’t a “snappish remark”; it was hateful (look at Joyce’s expression when she says it), and it was absolutely intended to hurt. It’s good that Joyce apologized immediately, but that doesn’t mean she didn’t say it, and it’s not the responsibility of Sarah, the injured party, to immediately accept the apology and make Joyce feel better.
Yes. Yes I am. 3-I already responded, but there is only one part that entirely sums up my response: “Joyce responded with a snappish thing that she instantly regretted and apologized for. Just straight up flat out took responsibility and apologized.”
I don’t think that’s what Sarah was trying to do. I think that Sarah literally didn’t have any more energy to put into making Joyce feel excited or better or whatever. She responded because Joyce said something to her; “Go, leave me, don’t worry about me. The less I meddle, the less I interact with you, the happier you’ll be. Get ready for your party and forget about what was done, and forget about me, so that I can forget how much I let you hurt me.”
Hey, you! Get out of her with your reasonable arguments and reflections upon the human condition as presented in this webcomic! Dont you know where you are? THIS…IS…THE INTERNET!!! Cat videos or GTFO!
…Accepted. You may remain on the internet. SO I DECREE.
poofdepoof
…I, I’ve never been kicked off the internet before. D’:
Mrsparkles
Poof, You may stay we need more people like you to maintain a level of decency and humanity that I know exists. Your argument was refined, intelligent and concise; your response wasn’t just good. It was better then a lot of the responses I have seen on the internet. You can stay poof, you can STAY.
Sarcasm and humor aside, there are no “sides” in this argument, or rather, there is only one, and it’s Sarah’s – even Joyce is on Sarah’s side, which is why this is so effective.
We can be apologetic of Joyce all we want, but the fact remains that we ALL know Joyce crossed a line and it’s lined with one of those one-way-tire-puncture…thingies.
Sarah has had a couple of positive interactions with Dina, which is actually a big deal for her, but I don’t think she knows Dina well enough to trust her.
I hope Sarah’s book makes her feel a little better… :/
I don’t really have much to say on the topic of blame or anything. Joyce hurt her friend, and now her friend is hurt. I’ll worry about their relationship later. I just hope that Sarah’s book can make her feel a little better.
Sorry to break it to you, but that book is printed in columns, which means it’s not some fabulous novel or inspiring poetry, but *textbook.* D: However, it doesn’t matter, because Sarah (if she’s anything like me) is staring at a blurry black&white page seeing nothing except that spiteful look on Joyce’s face from a minute ago (and possible the same look on Raidah’s face when she has also thrown the Dana issue at Sarah). Wounded.
189 thoughts on “Mean”
Jen Aside
Sarah: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xyFtA40Ahlk
Jen Aside
I’m not crying, no, I’m not crying
And if I am crying, it’s not because of you
It’s because I’m thinking about a friend of mine
You don’t know who is dying, that’s right, dying
These aren’t tears of sadness because you’re leaving me
I’ve just been cutting onions, I’m making a lasagna for one
licoricepencil
It’s just a little bit of dust in my eye from the path that you made when you said your goodbye
Leorale
I’m not weeping cause you won’t be here to hold my hand; for your information there’s an inflammation in my tear gland
Wire Segal
You sorta got to feel bad for her, though… joyce struck her deepest nerve.
Plasma Mongoose
The first cut is the deepest.
Yet_One_More_Idiot
Joyce, give Sarah a hug, NOW!
Also, damn you Willis! The feels! THE FEEEEEELS!
Ghola
Pretty sure Sarah would not be accepting of hugs right now.
Introverts who no longer trust people are not huggers.
Yet_One_More_Idiot
I am an introvert, and I can say that if somebody just really upset me with a random insulting outburst like Joyce just had, I would appreciate a big “I’m so sorry” hug by way of apology. :3
Ghola
I’d probably shake them off and tell them to let go of me, if I’m being honest. In varying degree’s of loudness.
I’ve been a Sarah, hugs would be.. not conductive right off. Maybe when opening a dialogue later, after the initial rage/sadness had bled off, hugs would be alright.
Glome the Gnome
I would only be ok with a hug if it was a close family member or friend that i have known for years. Not a roommate i have know for a few weeks.
Greenygal
Different people, different reactions. In this case, Sarah’s body language is about as unfriendly to overtures as it could be without her actually leaving the room; I wouldn’t try it if I were Joyce.
Yet_One_More_Idiot
I don’t think anybody else would dare to try it in this situation, but Joycy’s just the kind of gal who might. :3
Screwball
I reject your feels, & ignore my own…
Wait, did that come out right…
Roborat
That would make a good line for a song.
Doctor_Who
Sarah: “Our Dana, gone! I, Sarah, now lead. Let any who challenge step forward.”
Joyce: “I challenge.“
Jen Aside
HER FAAAAAAACE!
DarkoNeko
No.
Lord Axolotl
Hehe, nice TMNT reference Doctor_Who. 😉
Wire Segal
nooooo joyce ;-;
Jay
When Sarah doesn’t say anything mean, that’s how you know you really fucked up.
David Herbert
How’s Joyce going to make up for this one?
saki
Maybe by inviting Jacob? Not saying that would make everthing okay of course, but it might help a little.
Rich
Unless Jacob’s having second thoughts about breaking things off with Sarah, I can’t see where his presence is going to help much. Guess it’s possible, and him showing up with his roomie Ethan isn’t implausible. We know he doesn’t want to go to Roz’s party.
saki
Yeah I’m kinda hoping Jacob’s calmed down since the other day and is willing to talk things out… Maybe Joyce can advocate for Sarah a little, you know, convince him to give her a chance… But this is all just wishful thinking of mine.
timemonkey
Maybe she’ll explain WHY Sarah is pissed at Amazi-Girl and WHY she suddenly felt bad about laughing at Joyce’s naivite? I mean, if she won’t tell Becky herself but she does to make it up to Sarah that’s a pretty strong message to Sarah.
Orbit Junkie
There’s also the possibility that Joyce doesn’t know about her argument with Jacob, and will invite him as an apology, making the party even MORE awkward.
Greenygal
Joyce knows something happened, although not what exactly. Pretty sure she’s not clueless enough to just invite him and hope all will be well.
Orbit Junkie
Sorry, I forgot about that one.
bodmans
But what about ”Other Jacob”?
Screwball
Buzz is he’ll be around, but unlikely to make an appearance till after it’s over. Tends to happen like that with Other-Jacob…
Amazistool
Wait Other-Jacob is also named Buzz?
Buzz Lightsaber per chance?
Kris
Brrrr did it just get cold in here?
AnvilPro
“I’m going to sit in the corner, read my book and pretend I’m not in the room. That will show her!”
winter
It’s not about making a point to Joyce. It’s about mentally withdrawing.
Deanatay
Yep. That back, that is a ‘wall’ back. As in:
This is the wall
I put up between me and you.
Ain’t nothing gonna get through.
Ain’t nothing gonna get through.
LeslieBean4Shizzle
Wow Sarah – what a good way to make sure Joyce doesn’t enjoy her party.
otusasio451
…Really? You’re siding with JOYCE here? After that, she doesn’t DESERVE to enjoy the party.
3-I
She is very scared and is trying to do the right thing by her friend, and she doesn’t know how to help. Sarah is responding to the situation by trying to remind Joyce of the uncomfortable truths that Joyce is already well aware of.
Joyce responded with a snappish thing that she instantly regretted and apologized for. Didn’t even go “I just was” x or “I only meant” y or “You make me so angry that” n+1. Just straight up flat out took responsibility and apologized.
Sarah is bitter and disillusioned, and part of getting back to being a functional human being is NOT putting the wall up and saying shit that you know is going to make the other person feel even worse. And that’s not something she’s good at, because she got VERY badly burned with her old roommate and the people surrounding her. I can’t blame her for being in pain, but we’ve sorta proven time and again that her way of responding to the pain is to lash out at people who want to be there for her. She is the person you cannot apologize to, not because she won’t believe you mean it, but because she won’t care.
If Joyce had said something hateful, something intended to hurt, hell, even something just naive and bigoted and didn’t apologize for it, I’d be right along with you. But right now, Joyce is a scared little girl who is in a darker place than she has EVER been, because she is not only confronting the fact that everything she thought was good came from a perspective of hate, she’s also dealing with, you know, the fact she was fucking assaulted.
Yeah. I’m on Joyce’s side. I respect Sarah’s side, because she’s dealing with a hell of a lot of shit herself, but the fact of the matter is that Sarah is upset enough to say cruel things because of her OWN feelings, and Joyce is upset enough to say cruel things because she’s trying to take care of other people’s feelings.
Neither of them is right, but neither of them deserve not to enjoy a party. So NYEAH.
Greenygal
Huh? Sarah was absolutely trying to take care of other people’s feelings; that’s how this whole conversation started. “Being around you is painful for Becky; she needs space.” And for this expression of concern, Joyce attacked her in the most sensitive spot she’s got. It wasn’t a “snappish remark”; it was hateful (look at Joyce’s expression when she says it), and it was absolutely intended to hurt. It’s good that Joyce apologized immediately, but that doesn’t mean she didn’t say it, and it’s not the responsibility of Sarah, the injured party, to immediately accept the apology and make Joyce feel better.
LeslieBean4Shizzle
Yes. Yes I am. 3-I already responded, but there is only one part that entirely sums up my response: “Joyce responded with a snappish thing that she instantly regretted and apologized for. Just straight up flat out took responsibility and apologized.”
poofdepoof
I don’t think that’s what Sarah was trying to do. I think that Sarah literally didn’t have any more energy to put into making Joyce feel excited or better or whatever. She responded because Joyce said something to her; “Go, leave me, don’t worry about me. The less I meddle, the less I interact with you, the happier you’ll be. Get ready for your party and forget about what was done, and forget about me, so that I can forget how much I let you hurt me.”
otusasio451
Hey, you! Get out of her with your reasonable arguments and reflections upon the human condition as presented in this webcomic! Dont you know where you are? THIS…IS…THE INTERNET!!! Cat videos or GTFO!
Jen Aside
what about Puppy Bowl =<
otusasio451
…Accepted. You may remain on the internet. SO I DECREE.
poofdepoof
…I, I’ve never been kicked off the internet before. D’:
Mrsparkles
Poof, You may stay we need more people like you to maintain a level of decency and humanity that I know exists. Your argument was refined, intelligent and concise; your response wasn’t just good. It was better then a lot of the responses I have seen on the internet. You can stay poof, you can STAY.
Yet_One_More_Idiot
Dancing hamsters are also permitted
DarkoNeko
Ok then.
otusasio451
Accepted! Extra points for using a gif of what appears to be a Bengal. You are now an Internet Noble! SO I DECREE.
DarkoNeko
An ocicat, apparently (cross Siamese + abyssinians or bengal)s)
Tacos
There’s more the the Interwebz than cat videos. Mostly porn >.>
Screwball
The internet is for porn!
The internet is for porn!
Why you think the net was born?
Porn porn porn… XD
Jen Aside
I was expecting this
Jen Aside
whoops, I thought that was a different clip of that session
w/e
No Name
Sarcasm and humor aside, there are no “sides” in this argument, or rather, there is only one, and it’s Sarah’s – even Joyce is on Sarah’s side, which is why this is so effective.
We can be apologetic of Joyce all we want, but the fact remains that we ALL know Joyce crossed a line and it’s lined with one of those one-way-tire-puncture…thingies.
Spencer
Is this what we’re going to do today? We gonna feel things?
otusasio451
Hold on, let me check.
Yup, yup, my shirt is soaked in tears of sorrow. Tastes like unfathomable sadness.
Plasma Mongoose
Apparently…
a4lbi
I don’t know about your schedule, but I’m booked til 9am.
nothri
I’m gonna feel your mom today. For a nickel.
(FYI, that’s meant to imply your mother is a prostitute. Just so we’re clear.)
Jordan
Dammit Mike, we’re trying to be serious here!
extremist343
LOL!
otusasio451
DAMMIT JOYCE. You were the last person she trusted.
Jen Aside
At least she still has Other Jacob…?
[cut to Other Jacob electronically picking some other person’s nose]
DAMMIT
Pilgrim
There’s still Dina.
I’m actually serious when I say that.
Greenygal
Sarah has had a couple of positive interactions with Dina, which is actually a big deal for her, but I don’t think she knows Dina well enough to trust her.
poofdepoof
I hope Sarah’s book makes her feel a little better… :/
I don’t really have much to say on the topic of blame or anything. Joyce hurt her friend, and now her friend is hurt. I’ll worry about their relationship later. I just hope that Sarah’s book can make her feel a little better.
DarkoNeko
You are a good person.
Ghola
She’s reading count of monte cristo and plotting her extended revenge parade.
DarkoNeko
Ah, but it may take 15 to 20 years then.
saltchocolate
Sorry to break it to you, but that book is printed in columns, which means it’s not some fabulous novel or inspiring poetry, but *textbook.* D: However, it doesn’t matter, because Sarah (if she’s anything like me) is staring at a blurry black&white page seeing nothing except that spiteful look on Joyce’s face from a minute ago (and possible the same look on Raidah’s face when she has also thrown the Dana issue at Sarah). Wounded.