168

Misrepresent
Posted on March 28, 2019 by David M Willis
This month's first Patreon bonus strip is now available for all Patrons to log in and see!  Robin won this month's vote, so get ready for some Congresswoman DeSanto. And remember, you can up your monthly pledge so you can see tomorrow's Dumbing of Age strip a day early, every night!

168 thoughts on “Misrepresent”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    don’t worry, Danny, in Real Time eight weeks is like fifteen years

    1. Yumi

      But imagine how long Danny’s fifteen years have taken

      1. Needfuldoer

        A millennium, give or take.

      2. Yet_One_More_Idiot

        You can work it out as a simple ratio:

        8wks:780wks (15yrs)
        780wks:

        (780/8)*780 = 76,050wks. Or 1,462½ yrs. Meaning his 15yrs started in about the year AD555. xD

        [/maths]

    2. Mr. Random

      Eh, more like 8.5

  2. Doctor_Who

    I wholeheartedly believe that Danny tried to get existential with Joe when they were both three. We’re talking daily philosophy discussions over cookies and milk.

    Actually, that doesn’t sound half bad. Anyone up for some Keeble N’ Kant? Perhaps some Nietzsche N’ Nilla Wafers?

    1. Mr. Random

      Doritos and Descartes?

      1. MatthewTheLucky

        No, but you’ve given me a wonderful idea for a tabletop RPG.

        1. Dean

          The random encounter tables for that game are all screwed up, I once met three dire Jonathan Dancys in a swamp.

        2. King Daniel

          What loot did they drop?

        3. Dean

          They persuaded me that it was wrong to fight on that occasion.

        4. Makkabee

          Epistemologists of Unusual Size? I didn’t think they really exist.

        5. Needfuldoer

          As long as it includes The Dewmaster’s shop it’s a winner!

        6. Professor Detective

          Look up ‘Dungeons & Discourse’: where philosophical concepts and conundrums are your magic spells. It started as a two-off joke in Dresden Codak and some fans tried to roll with it.

      2. Wizard

        I crunch, therefore I am.

      3. Yet_One_More_Idiot

        Saltines and Sartre?

    2. Annonymouse

      I’m more of a Calvinist these days.

      1. hof1991

        I’m a Hobbesian.

  3. ValdVin

    Danny, maybe you should try the teal-black leather jacket and half-gloves.

    1. Keulen

      Unless he manages to become a woman in the next few strips I doubt that’ll work.

      1. ValdVin

        Oh, I didn’t mean to attract Joe; I meant Ethan.

        1. Kamino Neko

          To attract Ethan, he needs to dress up as a robot, not a biker.

        2. Kamino Neko

          (Full disclosure…this would work on me, too.)

        3. ValdVin

          Ooh, how about a robot biker?

          It would turn a few people into Marigold here.

        4. Michael

          Robot biker makes me mad that Bikers isn’t a faction in Smash Up

        5. Beef

          Ethan is already attracted to him so y’all just turned this into an afterschool special where the lesson is “Just be yourself”

          I hope y’all’re happy.

    2. Meagan

      Someone please do this fan art

  4. Yumi

    I desperately want to see a strip of little Danny and Joe meeting for the first time.

    1. ian livs

      I was just coming here to say that. But also I can’t imagine Joe without facial hair anymore so that would be bewildering. (At this point it’s been long enough that I can’t recall if we’ve seen him without it before–quite possibly–but that doesn’t change my inability to imagine it.)

      1. tim gueguen

        Joe was born with five o’clock shadow.

  5. Yotomoe

    Danny…and I hate to break it to you but…you’re not as hot as Joyce.

    1. Schpoonman

      Man, who is? Sal?

      1. Doctor_Who

        Looking through the polls archive, it went Sal > Billie > Carla > Dina > Becky > Joyce.

        But Billie’s being a butt right now, and Joyce has a cool jacket, so maybe she rose a spot.

        1. woobie

          Was that a hotness poll, though? Ranking females by their looks?

        2. RacingTurtle

          There have been hotness polls before. Mike tends to win the ones for dudes; I don’t know how much of that is genuine opinions—Mike is supposed to be good-looking, in-universe—and how much is trolling.

          (If we held a hotness poll now, it would clearly be Joe’s time to shine. It’s okay, Joe my dude, I understand; I sometimes changed up my appearance when I was depressed, because it was something I had control over.)

        3. ValdVin

          Mike can win hotness polls if (to use the cliche) you put a paper bag over his personality.

        4. RacingTurtle

          +*like*

        5. das-g

          Never assume that Mike’s personality can’t asshole its way out of a paper bag.

      2. MatthewTheLucky

        Ethan, Marcie, Jacob…

      3. BarerMender

        Amber. She’s the hottest of all. Carla is close second.

    2. Kyrik Michalowski

      Joyce is supposed to be hot?

      1. Doctor_Who

        I always figured in live action she’d look a little bit like Saoirse Ronan, so draw your own conclusions.

        Guess the art style leaves a lot to interpretation though.

        1. C.T Phipps

          I basically saw live action Joyce as Anna Paquin circa X-men.

        2. Needfuldoer

          I figured she’s a bit more like late-1970s Debby Boone.

        3. Ed Rhodes

          Excuse me! We need an upvote button for this post!

        4. Needfuldoer

          Maybe not Joyce, but Saoirse Ronan would by my first call to play Mindy.

      2. Woomy

        Joyce looks like Spongebob to me

      3. Jamie

        I don’t think that there’s a “supposed to be”, but I do find Joyce attractive. I dunno if I could stand her as a person, but as far as looks go? I’m into that.

        1. Yotomoe

          I find with Willis girls, I think how attractive I find them is inversely proportionate to how much I think I could stand them.

        2. Nono

          So Mary and Robin tank highest?

        3. King Daniel

          If you’re familiar with Yotomoe, you’d know Malaya is one of the tops.

        4. Yotomoe

          Mary’s not really on my radar. And Robin’s at least someone I’d grab a drink with.

      4. daredaemon

        She was a 4 on Joe’s list before he knew anything about her other than her looks, so by Joe’s standards I’d go for… not especially, but still far hotter than any guy.

        And it’s Joe’s standards that matter in this particular context.

        1. Tan

          Not exactly. She was a 4 after spending some time being inflicted with her Relationship Survey of Doom(tm), and moreover what he said was that with some “breaking in”, she would upgrade from a 4 to a 10.

          http://www.dumbingofage.com/2010/comic/book-1/03-men-are-from-beck-women-are-from-clark/corrupt/

          This would suggest that, in terms of base physical attractiveness, he would consider any flaws superficial, fixable with perhaps some different clothes/makeup/styling

        2. RacingTurtle

          Yup. We see in a comic shortly after the one Tan posted that based on looks alone, Joe was impressed by Joyce. It was the trappings of evangelical homeschooling that made her a 4. http://www.dumbingofage.com/2011/comic/book-1/03-men-are-from-beck-women-are-from-clark/dress/

          But now her rating is “JOYCE” (as in, she and other women are people, not numbers) because you’re becoming a better person whether you accept it or not, Joe.

        3. BBCC

          And y’know, a willingness to let him ‘fix her’ with his dick. In other words, he doesn’t think she’s especially attractive, physically, but she could be ‘fixed’ to be hotter and with a personality more receptive to getting frisky (using, of course, moves he’d teach her).

          Christ early Joe is gross.

      5. BarerMender

        She looks mighty fine in that jacket.

      6. Fidalgo

        Here’s a perfect Joyce: https://bignadaquasar.files.wordpress.com/2013/01/emma-stone-gwen-stacy-the-amazing-spider-man.jpg?w=639

    3. Madock345

      He is cute tho

    4. DailyBrad

      Honestly, of the male cast, he’s pretty cute. I’d put him under Jacob and maybe Ethan, but above above most of the other guys.

      I kinda hate to say it, but Joe’s really hot here.

      1. Yotomoe

        I think Danny would also like to be under Ethan.

      2. Unusually Angry Hippie

        I mean, he wouldn’t be a very successful manwhore if he wasn’t.

  6. AnvilPro

    Danny and Joyce is the friendship this comic needs more of

  7. wynne

    Danny’s line is certainly fodder for the ship, but honestly I don’t even care whether Joe and Joyce get together or not. I really like them as friends-slash-reluctant-nemeses who open up to each other. And it surprisingly feels like one of the realer/more organic relationships on here?

    Like Willis wasn’t necessarily planning it, he just liked bouncing them off from each other and things went from there.

    1. Sol Karas

      In Roomies!/It’s Walky! they also had a really good back-and-forth, to the point where they almost did have a relationship there. And then young willis went “wait no this is working out to well” and squashed it lol

  8. Stephen Bierce

    *the music fades out on the hacked Muzak and there is a brief announcement about the car with its lights on in the parking lot*

    1. BigDogLittleCat

      This made me laugh.

  9. BBCC

    Seriously, Joe, just because you’ve clearly forgotten about Becky’s existence doesn’t mean she evaporated.

    And oh, Danny, honey. It’s not your fault. Joyce had a very….persuasive case.

    1. C.T Phipps

      Becky and Joe can’t see each other. They exist on different Kinsey dimensions.

      1. BBCC

        That’s the only thing I can think of, yeah. 😛

  10. DailyBrad

    I do hope Joe relents, but it’s probably a decent sign of that for him to immediately realize what Joyce was shooting for here. It does at least show they’re on the same wavelength a bit here.

  11. Badgermole

    They understand each other in a profound sort of way. And Joe is progressively hottening… Ship ahoy.

  12. not someone else

    Goddamnit he’s got Brooding Loner hair now and he’s talking about how he’s such a bad boy who can never change but one woman keeps getting under his skin

    Of course I’m a “gay fanfic” romance fan and not a “Harlequin” so this just means I’m shipping him with Ethan to be the sweetness and light contrast

    1. C.T Phipps

      Ethan and Jacob would break Joyce’s brain.

  13. jeffepp

    See, Danny, he doesn’t want YOUR sweet, sweet lovin’. But, he’s in wuv with Joyce, and it’s breaking his brain.

    1. Zach

      Let’s get real, he’d behave exactly the same if all that was on his mind was falling for Danny. Or anyone, but his roommate who’s like family to him?

      Drama bomb!

  14. Woomy

    Jeez Joe, it’s just a new jacket. Stop being so overdramatic.

    1. Delicious Taffy

      Right? It’s not that deep, chief.

      1. abysswatcher1993

        Joe:”you don’t get it, Joyce. The jacket symbolizes your lost of mental innocence and that hardening of your soul.”

        Joyce: “Dude, it’s just a jacket.”

        1. Chronos

          Judging by her reaction, she doesn’t quite feel that way

    2. Keulen

      Well, Danny changed around the same time he started wearing that hat. Maybe Joe’s seeing a pattern that we’re missing. Probably not, but you never know.

    3. Bagge

      It’s a REBEL jacket.

    4. Nicolette

      Meanwhile, I’m telling myself “his hair is JUST brushed down, it’s not a reason to think he’s even HOTTER than before, there’s no reason to rethink your order of hotness between him, Jacob and Ethan…”

  15. Danielle

    no one cares….. uh….. dennis

  16. C.T Phipps

    Danny, stop trying to change your friends. It makes you a bad friend.

    Also, the hat is not your friend.

    It makes you want to move to Seattle and *not* play Grunge.

    1. BBCC

      You say that like Oregon and California aren’t the hipster centres of the world. ;P

      That said….nah, Danny, keep telling Joe when he’s being a gigantic douche. If for no other reason than maybe he’ll shut up just to avoid the arguing.

    2. Zach

      How do you figure?

    3. MatthewTheLucky

      I must adamantly disagree. Good friends do not let friends enter into a depressive spiral of meaningless sex and self loathing.

      1. MatthewTheLucky

        Mind you, really good friends will just stop the self loathing part, but then the spiral is more uplifting than anything else.

    4. molochmachine

      I feel like our culture as a whole now has a hard time distinguishing hipsters from basic dorkuses. might be because the last decade’s hipsters got old and moved back into the punk/folky dichotomies they came from, leaving mostly the hangers-on who absorbed the style affectations from third-hand mainstream media sources.

      1. John Smith

        Like ye olde geek vs nerd debate: if you’re seriously having the argument, you’ve already lost and nobody cares if you’re one or the other.

    5. newllend(henryvolt)

      I don’t see how one would haft to completely change who they are just to open up.

      1. thejeff

        If one’s identity is built around not opening up …

  17. Lia47

    thats straight guys danny

  18. Vee

    are we all aboard joe/joyce yet? please?

    1. Nono

      Nope.

    2. Jamie

      …Joyce can do better.

      1. MatthewTheLucky

        So can Joe. That’s what she’s counting on.

    3. Sol Karas

      I’ve been on board for a while!

    4. newllend(henryvolt)

      It would be like the 4th time I’d given it a shot and I’m kind of eyeing Joyce and Jacob right now but hey if it happens I wouldn’t be sour about it.

    5. DailyBrad

      Been on board. it is an interesting ship for quite a few reasons.

    6. Chronos

      Not particularly, no

    7. Lone Duck

      Makes sense. We know Joyce is drawn to big guys, like Ethan and Jacob. Also, Joe’s point of misrepresentation hits at the core of why he is the way he is. His father misrepresents himself as a decent, monogamous person, and has hurt many women. Joe sees himself as a womanizer, but tries to be honest about it.

      1. C.T Phipps

        I think his dad may actually have been trapped in a loveless marriage just like his wife. That’s not an excuse but I don’t think JoeDad and Joe are necessarily that different.

        It’s just Joe blames JoeDad for making his mom miserable.

        1. thejeff

          By you know, cheating on her all the time.

        2. C.T Phipps

          Yeah, they were not in a happy relationship and it should have ended much earlier.

        3. thejeff

          Well, it certainly should have ended earlier, but there’s no basis for thinking that Richard was “trapped” or that there was anything going on except him being a cheater. Anything’s possible, but everything we actually know points at him being the problem.

    8. John Smith

      Yup.

    9. ShinyNeen

      Look, I posted a Joyce/Dorothy fic just, like, a week ago so I’d be visibly lying if I said yes, but… second favorite Joyce ship? Probably. I love the growth each of them has gone through and the ways their interactions have changed as a result, it’s just this current bit with Joe trying very hard to wallow in stagnation or something that’s super frustrating to me. More of them going to each other for advice/support, please!

    10. Deadjolras

      I’ve been aboard this ship for years. They have great chemistry, a fascinating and are able to affect one another in ways I personally find very interesting and worth exploring.

  19. Nono

    Maybe Joe and Rachel really do belong together. They don’t think people can c hange.

    1. abysswatcher1993

      Nihilism shouldn’t be a romantic element, unless written by the creators of Rick and Morty.

      1. Needfuldoer

        Or they go to Arby’s on their first date.

      2. Kamino Neko

        ‘Nobody changes’ isn’t really nihilism, though. Nihilism (rather, existential and moral nihilism, which are the forms usually referred to) is the belief that there’s no inherent meaning to the universe. Change is orthogonal to that. Positive forms – the ‘make your meaning’ forms, as opposed to the ‘who cares?’ forms – can even encourage it. Decide what you want to be, and make it so.

        Joe and Rachel are engaging in something more akin to fatalism. (Although even fatalism doesn’t preclude change – just that if the change is going to happen, you’re not able to fight against it.)

  20. Deacon Blues

    Am I the only one who kinda ships Danny and Joyce? Like, I want Joe and Joyce for an “endgame”, but I would love it if Danny and Joyce became closer and at least semi-romantically involved.

    1. DailyBrad

      it could be cute, but while Danny’s one of the other Christians out of the cast, I also don’t really know if Joyce is especially his type. Joyce also seems to have a way of getting paired with the guys on the cast who are tall and broad shouldered. Ethan, Jacob, Joe…. Joyce likes her some big bois.

    2. BenRG

      I think that Joyce x Danny would be funny and ironic, given what things were like early on in Roomies, especially if they sort of fall together on protest, start hanging out and, ages later, someone (Becky, Sal or Sarah) innocently asks how long they’ve been together.

      1. Deacon Blues

        Yeah, that’s kind of what I’m thinking about. Plus, if she were hanging out with Danny more, that gives more chances of Joe and Joyce interaction, which is the best. I don’t remember if I commented on it, but an earlier strip with Sal and Amber talking about Danny weirdly gave me the impression that Sal was thinking about setting them up.

  21. Koms

    It’s like he’s non-existent

  22. Miri

    I think he’s talking about himself more than her – that it’s safer if he’s clearly a one-night stand (autocorrect changed that to one-hour!!)/casual hook up rather than somebody you could/should care for. I think he knows how like-his-parents’-dynamic it was to walk away from a serious conversation with somebody he has a connection to and who believes he can be better in order to bang the hot girl giving him the come-on. I think he’s lost faith in himself as a decent person…

    1. DailyBrad

      Definitely. I think he’s being unfair to himself, but fair is like the last thing that matters in times like this.

  23. DarkoNeko

    it’s not a matter of fairness. You don’t complain about someone getting an apple from a tree that you’ve been waiting since the tree was a sprout.

  24. Zatar

    We’ve all been there Danny.

  25. Josh Spicer

    Oh god, this is becoming a thing.

    Please let this continue.

  26. abysswatcher1993

    Maybe the reason Joyce has been more successful than Danny is because she has gone through hell and back to earth and shown true growth. Beating Joe, talking with him about a traumatic experience, defying him, etc. To Joe Danny is like a barking Chihuahua that just barks but doesn’t attack.

    1. MatthewTheLucky

      Yeah, but has Joyce ever threatened him with a ukelele?

      1. abysswatcher1993

        She threatened him with a Mike.

  27. Bagge

    Joe: “Also, we had a date and I totally blew it and you think I’m a pig and you are right and I don’t want attachment and I gave you a stupid zero when you clearly are a ten. An eleven. You are an eleven, Joyce. Oh God I’m falling for you SO HARD and i’m out of here before a box pops up with ‘It hurts itself in it’s confusion'”

    Becky: “You too, huh?”

    1. Kelandrea

      Really Wish There Was A ‘like’ Button. GOD i’ve shipped them since It’s Walky! and I Just… Really, Really, REALLY want it to go somewhere this time ;-; You can do it Joe!! YOU CAN DO IT!!! EARN THE JOYCE!!

    2. BenRG

      I think that you might be onto something. I think that Joe likes sweet, pure Joyce and doesn’t like daring and challenging Joyce. His real problem is that he doesn’t want Joyce to explore her rebel side.

      1. PB

        I hadn’t even considered this and now I am squeeing.

    3. thejeff

      With a big side of “And I have to stay away from you because I’m like my father and I would hurt you and I couldn’t stand that.”

    4. ShinyNeen

      Dang, this Confusion/Attract set Joyce is running is really dominating the campus metagame.

  28. Arianod

    It’s not easy being Danny.

  29. newllend(henryvolt)

    So tell me if this crappy song reference is fitting enough for this.

    “Cha-Cha-Cha-Changes, time may change me but I can’t change time~”

  30. TheFlamingonator

    Ok real talk danny is getting dangerously close to wearing a t-shirt that reads “Bazinga!”

    1. Jago

      How so?

      1. TheFlamingonator

        Idk, just a fear I have

    2. DailyBrad

      Ew, god no. Don’t put that evil on him.

    3. Schpoonman

      Hey, long-sleeves-under-short-sleeves is NOT exclusively BBT.

      1. ValdVin

        Danny’s got long sleeves under a short-sleeve polo; I don’t know if that’s ever been a Sheldon thing.

  31. miz

    Poor Danny. He can go join Amber in the “I put a ton of effort into trying to help my best friend open up and/or be more true to himself and Joyce got quicker results just by existing in his direction” club.

  32. BenRG

    Please let this come to Joyce and Danny to hang around for a while, even if it is only to discuss how to help Joe and the issues surrounding self-discovery.

    Joe? I’m not sure Joyce is misrepresenting what’s in the box, simply emphasising other aspects of her personality other than ‘Pollyanna’. In fact, I’m wondering how much of this is about you and change, not Joyce and change.

  33. Yugnat

    Okay, I’ve got to ask: who is this “Danny” the tags keep mentioning?

    1. BenRG

      Hat guy; he’s Joe’s room-mate and I believe that he also is known to accompany Sal’s heart-breaking ballads on ukulele.

      1. Jake'm

        So like, the hat is named Danny, or…?

    2. BarerMender

      Yeah, all I see is a floating hat.

  34. David H. Adler

    It’s like who’s not there?

  35. erejnion

    Time to switch to Dissenter, I guess.

  36. FacelessDeviant

    Uh oh. This is turning into some 5th sense stuff.

  37. BarerMender

    “Bothered you that much, huh?”
    “Joe. Don’t borrow power. My life doesn’t revolve around your opinions.”

  38. Ntrovert60

    The conventional wisdom was that women viewed men as “fixer-uppers” in need to reshaping to fit their desired partner. In that same CW, men found a woman that they wanted and then tried to freeze them in stone, so that they stayed the same.

    Fast forward to the 21st century. The world is, thankfully, far less binary. But however passé / tropey / (FITB), there is some truth in that POV. Not saying it is good, or right, just that it still exists.

  39. Octochan

    Could someone please link to that conversation that happened “yesterday” because I sure don’t remember it

    1. John

      Pretty sure this is it.

      http://www.dumbingofage.com/2019/comic/book-9-comic/02-but-the-sun-still-shines/changed-2/

      1. Schpoonman

        I forgot Sal’s “chubby lil’ white girl” line. Damn.

      2. Rowen Morland

        Did we ever get a follow up on the ‘kick you out of class, or make you the subject of it’ bit?

        1. ShinyNeen

          This is the first time we’ve seen Joe since then, so, no, sadly.

        2. Schpoonman

          Still hoping Leslie followed that panel up with two seconds of beat silence and then “Yeah, just kicking you out. This is toxic as hell and we don’t tolerate even one more second of it!”

        3. timemonkey

          I’m leaning towards him being made the lesson. Right now he’s trying to retreat into his comfort zone so having that zone being shown as not comfortable and safe is the best course of action. Getting kicked out let’s him dodge the negative ramifications of his attitude.

  40. ShinyNeen

    Dang, three whole rebuttals? I’m lucky to have a single coherent one when I need it.

  41. ziggy78eog

    Looks like Joe needs help. If all he sees in himself, is a womanizing pig, like his father is/was, that is not healthy. Too bad there are no positive role models, for Joe to look to.

  42. Douglas

    Who’s the new guy in the hat?

  43. Smooti

    …fuck, I still ship them a little. Dunno if they’re in the right place mentally, either of em, to go for it but maybe a few years from now when they’ve both gotten more comfortable with themselves.

    1. Zatar

      Oh I ship them A LOT. I just like you ship them when there in a place the relationship can both survive and be good for them.

      1. Zatar

        So like 10 more years real time and about a week comic time.

  44. PB

    Joe with tousled hair instead of slicked back hair: ?

    Joe refusing to change: ?

    Joyce calling him out and at least exploring new avenues: ?

    Everyone being uncomfortable with changing Joyce: ?

  45. Basil

    comparing the art here and the start of dumbing of age is crazy

  46. Sanrai

    Imagine my surprise with this being the first strip I see after neglecting this comic for over a year.

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