204

Yuppers
Posted on May 7, 2022 by David M Willis

204 thoughts on “Yuppers”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    more weird sex acts incoming

    1. newlland(Henryvolt)

      I was wondering how long it would take for some to make a pie related sex joke but I didn’t expect it from the first comment.

    2. Tawdry Quirks

      Knowing Carla’s tastes, I think her dream courtship would look more like this movie scene.

    3. Clif

      I’m not sure. But I have the distinct impression the comic made a left turn at Albuquerque.

  2. The Wellerman

    Awe! What precious smiles and laughter!!! ???

    (anyone know where I can find a large version of the first panel?)

    Oooo!!! And something rather fitting to go with them!

    It’s everyone’s favorite mischief maker, the most Perfect Pastry Punting Clown in Town, Carla Rutten!!!!

    ??? ???

    *plays “Pink Elephants on the Parade djJack remix” by iamjackg on hacked muzak*

  3. True Survivor

    I prefer pumpkin pie. How about you all?

    1. The Wellerman

      Cherry all the way!!! ??

      1. True Survivor

        That is good pie.

    2. Doctor_Who

      For eating? Yes, pumpkin, every time.

      As a projectile? Banana Cream is objectively the funniest.

      1. The Wellerman

        Of course an occasional shepherd’s pie is also a fancy, right Doctor?

        1. Switchchris24

          Shepherds Pie is on a whole other level, its no longer a desert and manages to be a full course meal all on its own, truly the perfect food.
          It is my fav food.

        2. Psychie

          Meat pies are pies, meat pies are not generally considered a dessert, ergo being a dessert cannot be part of the definition of a pie. Shepherd’s pie, Chicken Pot Pie, Pizza Pie, etc.

      2. Reltzik

        If you’re going for funny, banana cream’s a good choice.

        If you’re going for insult, blueberry stains worse.

    3. Viktoria

      Peanut butter pie. Pie crust, peanut butter, whipped cream. You can’t go wrong with that.

      1. True Survivor

        Oh that sounds good. I’ve never had one, but now I want to.

      2. Opus the Poet

        Reese’s Pie, peanut butter pudding on an Oreo crust with a ganache coating.

    4. Switchchris24

      Pumpkin Pie with a thick layer of Whipped Cream on top all the way. That and Chocolate Pie, in small amounts cause that pie can be Rich as fuck.

    5. Nono

      I prefer meat pies. But if we’re thinking sweet, I’ll go apple.

    6. Pinkie

      Does cheesecake count?

      1. The Wellerman

        If it’s a sweet cheesy pie you’re after, that would be a margarita PIZZA pie!!! ?

    7. OBBWG

      Best: Deep dish pizza pie with the works
      Dessert pie: Pecan
      Throwing pie: Banana Cream

    8. Yotomoe

      Pie sucks. It’s all about CAKE baby.

      But if I had to choose I’d say…Chicken Pot Pie.

      1. molochmachine

        Paul F Tompkins agrees with you!

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CmOkXV-S1zQ

    9. JessWitt

      Grasshopper.

      1. Opus the Poet

        That’s a good pie if it’s made with liquor.

        1. JessWitt

          I never had an actual grasshopper drink. Hopefully the mint taste drowns out the liquor.

    10. not someone else

      Banana cream with chocolate topping or peach cobbler.

    11. Rose by Any Other Name

      French Silk Pie.
      Is superior to all your lowly pie choices, you plebs.

      (Calling you plebs was a joke… the rest of it was not.)

    12. Dara

      In sweet pies:

      Boston Creme

      Strawberry Rhubarb

      After that pumpkin and apple.

      But savoury pies are desperately underappreciated in North America and I can’t recommend a good Aussie meat pie strongly enough.

      1. Opus the Poet

        Unfortunately you can’t get the good Aussie meat pies in the US anymore, my business partner has been trying to find them for years.

    13. alongcameaspider

      Sugar Cream Pie

      Fun fact: sugar cream pie is Indiana’s official desert, which is a thing that needs to be official for some reason

      1. Clif

        Pecan Pie is objectively superior to all others.

        1. BarerMender

          Sorry, apple pie rules. It has to be good apple pie, though, not that syrupy mess they sell in cheap eateries.

        2. khn0

          Unless you’re allergic to pecan.
          then it’s objectively not superior.
          Hey, I just demonstrated objectivity is impossible due to allergies.
          Hence, being allergic to objectivity is logic.
          Flawless.

    14. Bruceski

      Strawberry rhubarb.

    15. ktbear

      Steak and blue cheese is to die for.

      1. Edwin I Callahan

        Key lime pie, but my wife’s apple pie is great, too.

    16. Deanatay

      I know I’m an outlier, but mincemeat is still my favorite.

    17. Keulen

      Chocolate cream pie.

  4. Doctor_Who

    There are two theories at play.

    The Strong Carlathic Principle states that the reason the universe exists is to eventually produce Carla.

    The Weak Carlathic Principle states the same, but also posits that Carla herself is merely necessary as the delivery system for pies.

  5. Thag Simmons

    I thought Carla only threw pies at people she didn’t like.

    1. Thag Simmons

      The fun thing about this website not having an edit button is that sometimes I’ll just write the first half of a comment and then post it by mistake before I’ve figured out how I want to finish it.

      Oh well.

    2. JBento

      I *think* it’s a reference to Ultra-Car over at Shortpacked! throwing pies at Malaya, but I’m not sure.

      1. Thag Simmons

        Obviously a carry-over from Ultra-Car, we’ve just only ever seen Carla pie Mary in DoA

        1. JBento

          Technically, Mary pie’d herself, which makes sense: she’s the kind of person who only really loves herself.

        2. Rectilinear Propagation

          Thank you for reminding me that was actually a self-own on Mary’s part. I was a little alarmed when I thought these steps applied to what went down with her.

          Though I guess in Carla’s case throwing a pie is like swearing: whether it’s meant to indicate something positive or negative depends on context.

        3. Lars

          Carla tried to pie Mike in the bonus strips seen in book 10 or patreon.

    3. Deanatay

      That’s why the pie-throwing ENDS the courtship.

  6. Sirksome

    This advice could hurt a bit depending what kind of pie it is.

  7. DailyBrad

    “You’ve learned your lesson” got a big laugh out of me. I love Carla.

    1. RassilonTDavros

      How can you not love Carla?

      1. Kyrik Michalowski

        By being mary, or raidah, or some other stuck up asshole.

  8. Dark

    So… Carla was courting Mary?

    1. True Survivor

      Maybe? Carla’s not a small child, but assuming small children are a approximate modle: kids tend to do things like the pull the hair and be mean to those they have a crush on … but they also do it to kids they hate. In short, I have no idea.

    2. BBCC

      Nah, Mary didn’t smile before she got pied.

      1. Mturtle7

        Literally the exact line of my thought process after seeing that last panel.

      2. Jason

        I’m pretty sure she did. In general, beforehand (albeit insincerely) and if memory serves a triumphant grin upon grabbing and opening the box of pie.

        Carla should probably be very careful with that analogy.

        (Also my phone autocorrected that to “cars” which… wrong universe.)

    3. Yotomoe

      Listen, it’s probably my LEAST popular crack ship.
      Buuuuut.

      1. The Wellerman

        You said BUTT!!!! ?

        1. Clif

          I was expecting a link to go with the Buuuuut.

      2. jackiedu46k

        You have more crack ships? Most intriguing.

    4. Thag Simmons

      Actually, she didn’t throw the pie herself…

      1. Opus the Poet

        Right, she devised a Rube Goldberg Machine to throw it for her.

        1. Mturtle7

          Technically, she designed a Rube Goldberg machine to mess with Mary’s head enough that she’d activate a very simple pie-throwing device herself! Although, I guess one could argue that psyching out Mary was just another step in the Rube Goldberg machine.

          …and if you’re wondering how the hell I remember that scene so well, it’s because Carla is awesome and my brain will do whatever it takes to make space for memories about her.

        2. Needfuldoer

          The whole sequence starts here:

          https://www.dumbingofage.com/2016/comic/book-6/03-when-god-closes-the-door/rube/

          Fun and mildly disturbing fact: it went live six years ago this month.

    5. zaratustra

      Pies are a multi-channel message.

    6. DailyBrad

      Given her reaction to the suggestion Mary was into her, when presented by others? Absolutely not.

  9. True Survivor

    I never really got why Carla acted the way she did, but I think I have a better idea after this strip. She seems to me to be very lonely but also terrified of rejection (which makes sense) so she causes chaos and acts in semi-faux narcissistic manner in order to generate the human attention to fulfill the need for human contact, uncaring if it is sometimes in a negative form. Does that sound right?

    1. Jason

      She’s asexual. I can’t comment on her need for human companionship or any fear of rejection but sexually, that ain’t part of it.

      As for fear of rejection… there’s every implication that her parents adore and accept her. I think she’s a chaos machine for other reasons- possibly her upbringing was too structured and she finds joy in the opposite? It could also be that she never learned much about consequences (coming from wealth) but a line from a storyline where she was a main character- where she has to be perfect to be acceptable- suggests otherwise. Rather, I SUSPECT (and it is only a suspicion, partly from my own experiences and without seeing anything concrete to back it up) that Carla spent enough of her life as not-herself to be going to the other extreme in celebration of living as herself. She’s so high on the joy and freedom of being herself that she’s yet to learn how to temper that to be kind to others (and might never do so- although I think she’ll probably learn to reign it in.)

      Another interesting thing is there’s a strong overlap between being trans and being autistic. There’s nothing to imply that was Willis’ intent, and little to imply she could be beyond not being good at socialisation and social rules. But if she were a person rather than a written character it is ABSOLUTELY something I would wonder about.

      Sorry for the ramble, I just woke up and my ADHD and autism kicked in before my brain could run interference.

    2. thejeff

      A lot of it is defense mechanism, I suspect.

      Hurts less to be an asshole and have people dislike you for that, than to try to make friends and have people reject you anyway for being trans.

  10. ReFlex76

    Carla: Asexual? Annoy-sexual? Pie-sexual?

    1. The Wellerman

      I do believe Carla is an asexual who happens to be repulsed by sex.

      As for whether or not she is aromantic, not quite sure.

      1. BBCC

        Sexuality translates so she’s probably still homoromantic like she was in Shortpacked!.

        1. Clif

          I feel Pie-sexual is confirmed as well.

        2. Amelie Wikström

          A homoromantic, sex repulsed, trans chassi, pie throwing smart car’s soul in a tech billionaire heiress human body. Carla’s character has a lot going on with a slightly closer relationship on a metatextual level than most characters to her Shortpacked! incarnation, but she sure makes it work.

    2. Mturtle7

      I’m sure Carla would just argue that those are all the same thing. And then get really excited at your naturally annoyed response!

      …and then throw a pie in your face, just for good measure.

    3. Rainhat

      Gonna go MST3k: she’s her own Saturday Night Thing. Anyone into Carla is gonna have vicious competition because so is she.

  11. Kirtro

    god help that dorm when those two find out about that lonely island song

    1. Savail

      Actually sent that to my mum after my first time. She was a little confused, but also proud.

      (Probably important context: I have OCD and struggle with it a lot, but especially when I was younger; bodily fluids were something I had particular issues with and were a frustratingly frequent source of intrusive thoughts.)

  12. brionl

    I thought the pie throwing was from Shortpacked. Has she ever actually done that here?

    1. OBBWG

      Not directly, but she has pied someone.

      1. VP

        So is she interested in Mary??

        1. RedCat

          I think that was more for self-love.

    2. Thag Simmons

      She set a pie trap, which is similar but distinct from pie-throwing.

    3. Mturtle7

      Pretty sure this is the first time it’s canonically established that pie-throwing is also a habit for Carla in the universe (as opposed to a one-time thing)!

      I am now DEEPLY interested in the question of who the hell else Carla has actually thrown a pie at recently, and whether this will develop into a committed one-sided pie-throwing relationship (to be clear, this is not any sort of innuendo, I just mean that in the most literal sense possible).

  13. BBCC

    See, Carla ALSO is annoying as shit if she doesn’t like you and loves pieing people, so it’s hard to distinguish.

    Just the way she likes it.

  14. Yotomoe

    https://i.imgur.com/PqiuAVK.png (NSFW)

    I’ve had this joke in mind for a bit.

    Story so far.
    https://imgur.com/a/9Ob1cy3 (NSFW)

    1. The Wellerman

      BUTT BUTT BUTT BUTT!!!!

      ???

    2. Yotomoe

      BtW I doubt the alphabet thing actually works, but I imagine Walky would believe in it.

      1. The Wellerman

        He was SINGING THE ALPHABET INTO HER ASS!!!!

        ??????????

        1. Icarus

          Not singing. And not ass.

      2. Rose by Any Other Name

        It does not.

        I believe the idea is to vary the direction of one’s tongue strokes, but while mixing vertical swipes with the occasional set of circles can produce some good response, actually doing the alphabet is far too slow due to the precision required and half of the motions are not particularly stimulating.

        But yeah, given the popularity of a certain movie, a lot of people do try that in college.
        **raises a guilty hand**

        1. RassilonTDavros

          …at the risk of sounding like a complete idiot, what’s the movie?

        2. Rose by Any Other Name

          American Pie.
          One of the male characters (can’t remember their name) gives the alphabet advice about performing cunnilingus to another male character.

        3. The Wellerman

          Well, any songs you do recommend?

          What do you recommend?

        4. JBento

          Apparently, not the Alphabet Song.

      3. hazel

        (Gonna pay this forward –the alphabet trick in cunnilingus definitely does work for some people. Of course, the effect is blunted if it’s noticable as the alphabet or awkwardly deliberate, but it’s a good way to change things up for your partner if you run out of ideas, which will happen if your mind is cloudy from arousal and/or if you go for a while.)

        1. Rose by Any Other Name

          I think that was the problem I ran into – I am very precise with my tongue and ‘awkwardly deliberate’ is a good description how it went when I tried it.

    3. Bagge

      ain’t gonna lie – this is super hot.

      1. Yotomoe

        I’m really happy to hear you say that. My only goal with this series is to make strangers see it and get turned on. It’s weird to say it like that but it’s true. I want to be able to make something to get people hot n’ bothered!

        1. Rose by Any Other Name

          I get that.
          I have rather similar goals myself.

        2. The Wellerman

          Me too. Horny Hypnosis is a tough ninjitsu to master, but well worth it!

        3. Bagge

          Well, you can consider that particular goal a success.

          What really did it for me was Billie flashing and teasing Walky. Everything from there is hot too, but just her way of taking control of the situation and escalating it was top notch.

    4. Rose by Any Other Name

      Oh, small thing I noticed. In the new story-so-far link, you have the original version of her vagina not the updated one with the corrected position.

      1. Yotomoe

        oh really? I thought I had both of them up.

  15. Bagge

    Carla has it all figured out.

  16. Mr. Random

    Does that mean she’s into Mary?

    …Mary?

    1. huehuetotl

      Carla does not annoy Mary. She antagonizes her, important distinction.

    2. Proxiehunter

      I mean, she’s not unattractive she’s just a mega-asshole. Like a .5 on the Carolometer. Or a .1 on the Toe Dad scale.

    3. Sirksome

      I could see that if Mary hadn’t turned out to be a horribly transphobic/homophobic/bigot. Carla actually leans toward masochistic crushes on women. It could’ve been a thing if Mary weren’t horrible.

    4. Yotomoe

      *cough* I ship it *cough*

    5. Drakkin the Alien

      umh… https://www.dumbingofage.com/2016/comic/book-6/03-when-god-closes-the-door/box-2/

      1. Sirksome

        I mean at this point is it the literal, physical act of throwing the pie that makes it courtship or the feelings and desire of a pie connecting the person of your affection? I feel like people are getting too caught up in that detail.

    6. Deathjavu

      This is why the smiling is considered an essential step.

      1. Mturtle7

        …You know, someone else linked back to that strip, and upon rereading it I am rather disturbed to realize that Mary DID, technically, smile a few seconds before getting her pie in the face.

        Oh, oh! Wait! But she didn’t actually smile AT CARLA! She was just giving the universe in general a shit-eating grin! Phew. Accidental courtship ritual avoided.

    7. BarerMender

      When Billie and Ruth suggested to Carla that Mary was hot for her, she was grossed out and vowed to build a catapult suit. So no.

  17. Yotomoe

    Carla’s courtship mirrors my courtship practice almost exactly except for step 3. My step three is just “????”
    One of these days I’ll figure out what I’m supposed to do there.

    1. newlland(Henryvolt)

      Mine also except like to end mine with a really thought out compliment for step 3 to see if I can ease them down after working them up a bit. Make the feel a flurry of emotion after meeting with me the first time.

    2. Shadowsnail

      Advice from an advice podcast I listen to: Just tell her, stupid. (Applies equally to “him” or “them”)

    3. Mturtle7

      I don’t understand. We read the same strip, right? Carla is literally TELLING you what you’re supposed to do for step three! GO FOR IT, BUDDY! YOU FIND A DAMN PIE, AND CHUCK IT RIGHT AT THE OBJECT OF YOUR AFFECTIONS!

    4. BarerMender

      You ‘posed to grab her butt. If she doesn’t punch you in the eye, she likes you.

      1. Taffy

        And if she only punches you a little, she hasn’t made up her mind yet.

    5. Deanatay

      I’m pretty sure Step 3 is Profit!!

      Of course, what you consider “Profit” is up to you.

  18. newlland(Henryvolt)

    So how many girls has she flirted with if that’s the case?

  19. bcb

    Carla remains my favorite DoA character.

  20. James Starkey

    Carla makes it all so simple, and shows me what I’ve been doing wrong for 20 years. Time to buy a bakery.

  21. Chaucer59

    I see Carla is a proponent of the Marx Bros. school of courtship.

    1. khn0

      she’s, like Elon musk, a marxist.

      1. JBento

        I’m pretty sure I’m gonna regreat asking this, but how is Elon Musk a Marxist?

        1. khn0

          Well the guy wrote

          “Marx was a capitalist. He even wrote a book about it.”

          Maybe as a bait or a troll…

          But if you give it any thought, it’s not so wrong, it’s just they (Musk and any capital owner, whatever their ideology) are not in the proletarian camp:
          Buffet said something along the lines of “there’s classwar and we are winning it”.

          But yes it could be safer to say “marxian”, since “marxist” is colored by what Lenin and Luxemburg wrote. Also, it was a joke, but I had no cigar.

        2. Daibhid C

          My favourite intersection of Musk and leftwing politics was when he explained to close friends of the late Iain M. Banks that he understood what Banks was saying in the Culture novels better than they did, actually. I think this was also the exchange where he said “I am actually a socialist. Just not the kind that shifts resources from most productive to least productive”, which is kind of like saying “I am actually a vegetarian, just not the kind that wastes valuable protein by not eating delicious animals”.

        3. Sombrero

          He’s Elon fucking M-vowel-consonant-consonant. Why do you think he chose that surname? Of course, it’s so unsubtle that we can establish he did that in his childhood.

        4. BubbaFett

          Pretty sure his parents, Mr and Mrs Musk, chose his surname

        5. Sombrero

          Yeah, like this would be an impediment for the guy who names his child X AE A-XII.

        6. JBento

          Are… are you somehow under the impression that people choose their own surname short of getting it legally changed after the fact?

        7. BBCC

          Pretty sure they’re joking, JBento.

        8. JBento

          This is the internet. I have SEEN things.

  22. Kravis

    I suppose it makes sense that Becky isn’t averse to pies.

    It’s cream pies she’s not a fan of.

  23. Ridtom

    I can’t tell if this is fuel for those who think Carla is into Sal or not.

  24. BubbaFett

    How much longer is this story line going to go for

    1. Thag Simmons

      Next storyline is “This Was Halloween” and will be starting on July 2nd, about a month from now.

      1. adam black

        is this a Joke?

        1. Thag Simmons

          Two months from now, I blame Julius Caesar for the error

      2. BubbaFett

        Hope you’re right even if you’re joking

        1. Thag Simmons

          I’m not joking but I am wrong. Got the order of the months mixed up, it’s two months away instead of one.

        2. adam black

          This sounds awesome if a year late. was this announced on tumblr?

      3. Sirksome

        “This was Halloween?” As in a possible Halloween flashback? I was kinda hoping we would continue to skip that time. It’s more fun for me to guess what happened and try to find hidden context clues than to actually see it. Do we really need to know how Walky and Amber split?

        1. BubbaFett

          I’ll take any story line over this current one

        2. Clif

          Sirksome, but costumes.

        3. adam black

          Dont read it and you can guess.

          Nah, I dont find it fun.

          I hate time skip forward. Too much Too fast, Broke every storyline while depriving us of Holidays. and character development.

  25. Juanoku

    If you’re into classic era joker type play, then i guess that’s feasible?

  26. PirateTawnee

    Carla is the best. Sorry to all the Dina fans out there.

    1. The Wellerman

      No woories Bee Happy La La La La…..

      How about both together. With Carla and Weed? Surely things are better together!

      After all, why do we combine foods to cook them? New flavors!!!!

      1. The Wellerman

        Sorry I forgot to say this, but

        Happy Unbirthday Becky and Dina he he he….!!!!

        *plays “Mad Tea Party”on Carla’s speakers*

  27. mrnoidea

    I mean, you could get a premade crust, fill it with whipped cream, and there you go. Pie.

    Technically.

    (should be cheaper than buying a prepackaged pie, anyway)

  28. Emily

    Ah Carla, a gremlin as always.

  29. adam black

    American Pie 9: Pie For Lesbians.

  30. Rabisch

    Wait! Carla did those things to Mary … and Dina, Becky and everyone else in the building know it! Carla… what, WHAT DO YOU IMPLYING HERE!?! But it’s clear… she used to have a crush on Mary. But now, after throwing a pie on her face, it’s over… At least for now!

    1. Eldritchy

      Farewell Ambigous Courtship, until Mary’s next appearance… which might be never but Dina and Becky were a bit Too happy recently so I’m sure some partypooper will pop up soon.

  31. BarerMender

    The last frame. Carla is SO pretty.

  32. karishi

    Carla confirmed pisexual

  33. Lone Duck

    In a way, Dina did throw her pie in Becky’s face…

    1. BarerMender

      Or did she say, “Come and get it honey; it’s cherry.”

  34. someone

    Carla’s vision of courtship is being annoying? I think this confirms that she is panromantic. She’s been flirting with everyone she ever met, and has even crossed the fourth wall to be courting the readers.

    1. BorkBorkBork

      Still waiting for my pie, then.

  35. JBento

    When Carla from on high
    Hits your face with a pie
    That’s amoreeeee.

    1. Eldritchy

      Fire back with a pie of your own!

    2. Taffy

      When she glide down the street
      With the wheels on her feet
      That’s-a Carlaaa

  36. Sombrero

    Soon Dina will have a pie-stained dinosaur in her room.

  37. Dr. T

    I’m still at step 3 in my courtship with my wife, though after 25 years she receives fewer pies than I’d like to give her.

    Wait, was she talking about literal pies? Well, now it’s not as relatable to me.

    1. Taffy

      Lmao you fuck your wife? Cringe ?

      (The preceding is only a goblin-brain joke and in no way intends to reflect the actual value or opinions of Taffy)

  38. Icalasari

    Carla is piesexual

    Badum, tsh!

  39. Pat

    Does it have to be a woman? Because I still ship Carla/Malaya from their Shortpacked! counterparts.

  40. Deanatay

    Carla sees the world in black and white.

    Black is those who laugh at her, because they’re idiots who can’t appreciate the awesomeness that is Carla.

    White is those who laugh with her, because of course Carla is frickin’ hilarious, and they are but bugs who wish to be hilarious-adjacent.

    Laughing about something.. else? Not seein’ it.

  41. Derek

    Does…does this mean Carla likes Mary?? Didn’t Carla specifically say she’s not into that?? And yet Mary is the only person of any gender Carla has pied

  42. PB

    There’s evidence of the existence of things outside of Carla?

  43. ESM

    The idea that Carla is annoying to women when she has a crush on them really recontextualizes her relationship with Mary in a weird way

    1. Spencer

      So many comments about Mary as if there isn’t one big huge qualifier there in the “when she smiles” bit.

      The real meat to chew on is that every single interaction Carla has ever had with Sal involves annoying the hell out of her.

      1. Eldritchy

        Yeah… Carla might have to fist-fight Joyce for this one.

  44. Harmony

    There’s a part of me that finds it really strange seeing the continuity between DumbingOfAge, ShortPacked, and ItsWalky.

    Like I know they’re all supposed to be parallels/continuum somehow, but the settings are so different sometimes that it weirds me out a little when the connect.

    I keep expecting Head Alien to pop up at any moment, laughing about the success of his maniacal plan to separate the heroes from their abilities once again.

    1. Daibhid C

      Shortpacked and It’s Walky are the same continuity.

  45. Inbar Fink

    I love Carla so much

  46. John

    I am in a weird state of both liking Carla and hating her for her self obsession/narcissism.

  47. Jade

    Goodness, I hope this doesn’t mean Carla was courting Mary D’:

    So it seems that Carla’s form of courtship involves pranks. I wonder if they also include riddles, games of chance, and a lively jig ?⭐????

    1. The Wellerman

      Ah, a Homestuck thingamaboob!!!

      Been a while since Ive seen one of these! ?

  48. ischemgeek

    In terms of the classic dysfunctional family roles, what do we think Joyce’s siblings would be assigned? John’s probably the Hero, Jocelyn says she’s the favorite so I’m guessing she’s the golden child, and Jordan is obviously the Scapegoat, but how do we classify Joyce? I’d guess a secondary Hero to project the pious family image, but what do you all think?

    1. Sam

      Joyce may have started as a Hero/Golden Child but I would say she definitely slid straight into Scapegoat and Identified Patient. Where if she turned back, it would be more accepted than Jordan, but if asked ‘how the family broke’, Carol and John would be pointing straight at her without a second thought.

      Jocelyne also slides between Golden Child in front of family to Lost Child as much as humanly possible as she basically wants to DISAPPEAR and not be visible when with them.

      And Jordan is a Scapegoat who made himself a Lost Child by yeeting himself right out of the family for his own well-being.

      And Becky was the honourary family Mascot.

  49. Darkoneko

    step 5 : creampie ?

  50. Spencer

    It’s 8PM and I need to express my furious disapproval at the commentariat that only one other person has mentioned Carla’s constantly annoying Sal.

    Consider the following: https://uselesslilium.tumblr.com/post/111963280919/ah-yes-carlasal-yet-another-example-of-me

    1. Thag Simmons

      Usually I link this comic to make a different point, but yeah, I can absolutely see Carla having a bit of “appreciation” for Sal

  51. DalNiente

    How to Solve A Problem (Carla-style): Throw A Pie At It.

    Being harassed? Throw a pie! Got a crush? Throw a pie! Problems solved!

  52. Zaxares

    No offense, Carla, but that is a TERRIBLE way to start a relationship. ;P

  53. Stephen Nedland

    Carla is overlooking an important part, in her process, and that is fruit pie, or cream pie (no, not that, you pervy sicko). They are not the same, and would interact with the human face differently, upon impact.

  54. Carla's #2 Fan

    And she’s ace too?! I love Carla so much! ?

  55. Kaidah

    So wait, was Carla actually hitting on Mary here?

    https://www.dumbingofage.com/2016/comic/book-6/03-when-god-closes-the-door/rube/
    (a story in three parts)

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