My cousin Steve got blinded by a spitting-koala, then kicked to death by wallabies as he writhed in agony on the ground. In suburban Melbourne.
Bicycle Bill
Peregrin — safe *for* you or *from* you?
Batman
@davidbreslin101
dude… what the fuck
thats fucked up man. sorry for your loss, thats just awful holy shit
darklaugh
Hilariously our native scorpions are not deadly to humans
Tan
Sheep are not native to Australia, being first introduced in 1788.
The Other Mike
I don’t remember where I saw this, but it seems appropriate to quote.
Things that will kill you in Australia: Everything. Yes, everything.
Things that will not kill you in Australia: …Hugh Jackman seems nice…
Sadly, we all seem to be graced with Murdoch in one form or another.
AngelBadman
Abbott is a bank bencher and Murdoch’s passport says he is American
Willoughby Chase
Murdoch should be labelled a pandemic, his minions every where making people’s lives miserable. I shan’t be sorry when “the Boys” Kyle and Lachlan take over.
Abbot is yesterday’s man.
AngelBadman
We also have One Nation, race riots and a history of genocide, soooooooooo…
Shaunock
I’m still on the side of more-good-than-bad.
Orion Fury
Throughout that whole pushback for Obama-care, all I was wondering was, I already have it, and it seems to be working fine for everyone. So, why fight?
Needfuldoer
What there’s nothing wrong with the Silver Line, or any nof the MBTA system for that matter. It’s always on time and it never breaks down, because we so fastidiously maintain it.
Oh my god have we been having so much rain. Your town been getting the constant flooding too, and get irritated by the constant calls warning that outside is dangerous?
She came from Tennessee, right? That’s south of hell.
Viktoria
I refuse to accept any theology that places hell anywhere except Florida.
Reltzik
Hey, Hell’s a big place. Why can’t it be all of the Bible Belt, including Northern Florida?
butts
Hell is everywhere on Earth.
Slartibeast Button, BIA
Except Texas, because if you own Hell and Texas you live in Hell and rent out Texas.
Reltzik
Actually, I’m pretty sure that Hell is in South Dakota
Tunaro
Should we just cut out the middle man and agree that all the continental states are in the burning fires? ‘Cause to be honest, I’m pretty sure Hawaii’s still cool.
Disloyal Subject
Nah, Hawaii was cool until tourists came and brought Hell with them.
hof1991
Hell is other people. They are why we can’t have nice things.
Tunaro
Wait, so does that make Alabama part of the 9th circle?
Circle 9 is for betrayers. Specifically betrayers to kin, betrayers to country, betrayers of patrons/benefactors, and betrayers of guests. Also, circle 9 is frozen. I’d place Alabama in either circle 2 (lust) or circle 6 (anger).
Disloyal Subject
My experiences with Alabamans lead me to support both of those and suggest Sloth.
Unless inspiring wrath counts towards the 6th, in which case definitely anger. I’m legitimately surprised he lived long enough to make it home to Alabama.
Reltzik
Thought it was Kentucky. Oh well, so much for that joke.
JoyceParty
I really do wonder exactly what Catholic school Sal went to in Tennessee, and in what region there would have been a hypothetical Catholic school. I lived there for five years and there were like, maybe two Catholics.
As far as boarding schools, there’s Kings Academy which is generic “Christian”, and St. Andrew’s-Sewanee, which is Episcopal. The rest (very shockingly) have no religious affiliation.
Granted, while “two” is a stretch, the majority of Tennesseans are not Catholic (while supposedly only 3% – 6% of Tennessean Christians are, depending on your sources, which seem to be split). The majority of Tennessean Christians are White Evangelical Protestant, and there are similar-but-totally-not-the-same-enough-to-warrant-a-whole-other-church Churches of Christ, Churches of God, etc. on every. single. corner.
Idontcarenomore
I think Sal was in a private school for disciplinary action against unruly or lawbreaking kids. She robbed a convenience store and got caught at the scene.
Catholic School was a cover story – I think.
Andy
Y’know, that’s a good point – Tennessee is the least Catholic state, but there is a diocese of Nashville, with a population of 70,000 Catholics. More than enough to support a boarding school, especially if they get students from out-of-state. But I also like the idea that she was in some kind of court-ordered facility. We’ll have to see what Willis gives us over the next 5 years.
Spencer
It probably was a Catholic school, but I’m not sure about it being court ordered. The way I saw it is that being sent to Tennessee was a thing the Walkertons did on their own.
Can Sal be ordered to an out-of-state boarding school for five years? Even considering the crime she committed that seems really excessive for a juvenile.
thejeff
It may have been some kind of deal to avoid actual jail/juvenile detention.
Spencer
That’s what I’m thinking. My theory is that Blaine, the Siegals and the Walkertons cut a deal so Sal would avoid juvie and Amber wouldn’t have charges pressed against her for stabbing Sal.
No, Hell for certain is in Leslie County, Kentucky. That’s why I brought Leslie in the discussion.
Ana Chronistic
You’re the only one so far who got the community name correct =p
we're already there
There is also one in Michigan,
The story goes that at the town meeting to determine the name some guy stood up and said ‘I don’t care if you call it h***!’ and walked out, so the town took the gauntlet and smacked him with it and named the town such.
Ana Chronistic
That’s Hell, Michigan
Not “Hell for Certain, Kentucky”
Bicycle Bill
I thought it was in Livingston County, MI. At least that’s the one that makes the newscasts in the wintertime when it gets so cold that “Hell has frozen over”.
Disloyal Subject
There are several. I believe the one in Michigan is the one whose welcome sign tends to get photographed while frozen over with icicles.
Marsh Maryrose
Cross-checking USGS “populated places” with Google Maps, we get:
Hell, MI
Hellhole Palms, CA
Helltown, CA
Little Hell, VA
All of these are unincorporated communities, not recognized by the USPS.
He isn’t tolerating Dorothy here as much as not considering her an imminent danger to Joyce’s salvation. I mean, that makes tolerance easier, sure, but it’s not the same thing.
Yeah, but at least his fear and mistrust of Dorothy isn’t the knee-jerk fear and mistrust he was raised with, but a NEW fear and mistrust that he’s learned by watching Dorothy interact with his daughter. It’s a step in the right direction, at least?
That would imply Dorothy is from hell to begin with. Yet her parents seemed so nice. Maybe the rents in hell are just super reasonable, and it’s a short commute to their jobs.
293 thoughts on “Reunited”
Ana Chronistic
“Yup, we’re going to Hell for Certain”
…
“Kentucky”
JessWitt
More like “Arizona”.
Tacos
Ehh it’s been pretty rainy here for like the past two weeks so it’s not that hot. Humid though.
JessWitt
Shame the rain doesn’t wash away toxic Republicans.
butts
Sometimes I think about how great Massachusetts is compared to everywhere else. Then I remember busing.
Shaunock
Hi from Australia, we have free health care.
butts
Screw free health care. You have platypodes.
butting
And spiders. And snakes.
So many snakes.
Sometimes I wish the Tasman Sea was wider.
Tunaro
How well does free healthcare even work when all the natures is constantly trying to kill everybody over there?
Disloyal Subject
Don’t forget jellyfish, coral snakes, kangaroos, and all manner of other nasties.
On the other hand, Strayaland also produced kelpies, so…
Falling Star
@Tunaro:
It actually sounds really helpful.
Deanatay
Indeed, almost NECESSARY.
Shaunock
And they are just wonderful )
Bicycle Bill
Considering that every specimen of native wildlife in Australia has the ability to kill you — and will do its absolute best to do so if given half a chance — I can understand why.
Abel Undercity
https://youtu.be/HmRexWQhs3M
Peregrin
I’ve heard some of the sheep are safe.
davidbreslin101
My cousin Steve got blinded by a spitting-koala, then kicked to death by wallabies as he writhed in agony on the ground. In suburban Melbourne.
Bicycle Bill
Peregrin — safe *for* you or *from* you?
Batman
@davidbreslin101
dude… what the fuck
thats fucked up man. sorry for your loss, thats just awful holy shit
darklaugh
Hilariously our native scorpions are not deadly to humans
Tan
Sheep are not native to Australia, being first introduced in 1788.
The Other Mike
I don’t remember where I saw this, but it seems appropriate to quote.
Things that will kill you in Australia: Everything. Yes, everything.
Things that will not kill you in Australia: …Hugh Jackman seems nice…
Solenoid
Keep it, you have Abbott and Murdoch.
Abel Undercity
Sadly, we all seem to be graced with Murdoch in one form or another.
AngelBadman
Abbott is a bank bencher and Murdoch’s passport says he is American
Willoughby Chase
Murdoch should be labelled a pandemic, his minions every where making people’s lives miserable. I shan’t be sorry when “the Boys” Kyle and Lachlan take over.
Abbot is yesterday’s man.
AngelBadman
We also have One Nation, race riots and a history of genocide, soooooooooo…
Shaunock
I’m still on the side of more-good-than-bad.
Orion Fury
Throughout that whole pushback for Obama-care, all I was wondering was, I already have it, and it seems to be working fine for everyone. So, why fight?
Needfuldoer
What there’s nothing wrong with the Silver Line, or any nof the MBTA system for that matter. It’s always on time and it never breaks down, because we so fastidiously maintain it.
/s
Historyman68
Also Mass’s former governor.
Keegon
Oh my god have we been having so much rain. Your town been getting the constant flooding too, and get irritated by the constant calls warning that outside is dangerous?
JasonAW3
“Alaska”
Reltzik
….
So does that make Sal the Biker Chick who Came Back from Hell?
Doctor_Who
She came from Tennessee, right? That’s south of hell.
Viktoria
I refuse to accept any theology that places hell anywhere except Florida.
Reltzik
Hey, Hell’s a big place. Why can’t it be all of the Bible Belt, including Northern Florida?
butts
Hell is everywhere on Earth.
Slartibeast Button, BIA
Except Texas, because if you own Hell and Texas you live in Hell and rent out Texas.
Reltzik
Actually, I’m pretty sure that Hell is in South Dakota
Tunaro
Should we just cut out the middle man and agree that all the continental states are in the burning fires? ‘Cause to be honest, I’m pretty sure Hawaii’s still cool.
Disloyal Subject
Nah, Hawaii was cool until tourists came and brought Hell with them.
hof1991
Hell is other people. They are why we can’t have nice things.
Tunaro
Wait, so does that make Alabama part of the 9th circle?
Rukduk
Circle 9 is for betrayers. Specifically betrayers to kin, betrayers to country, betrayers of patrons/benefactors, and betrayers of guests. Also, circle 9 is frozen. I’d place Alabama in either circle 2 (lust) or circle 6 (anger).
Disloyal Subject
My experiences with Alabamans lead me to support both of those and suggest Sloth.
Unless inspiring wrath counts towards the 6th, in which case definitely anger. I’m legitimately surprised he lived long enough to make it home to Alabama.
Reltzik
Thought it was Kentucky. Oh well, so much for that joke.
JoyceParty
I really do wonder exactly what Catholic school Sal went to in Tennessee, and in what region there would have been a hypothetical Catholic school. I lived there for five years and there were like, maybe two Catholics.
As far as boarding schools, there’s Kings Academy which is generic “Christian”, and St. Andrew’s-Sewanee, which is Episcopal. The rest (very shockingly) have no religious affiliation.
Granted, while “two” is a stretch, the majority of Tennesseans are not Catholic (while supposedly only 3% – 6% of Tennessean Christians are, depending on your sources, which seem to be split). The majority of Tennessean Christians are White Evangelical Protestant, and there are similar-but-totally-not-the-same-enough-to-warrant-a-whole-other-church Churches of Christ, Churches of God, etc. on every. single. corner.
Idontcarenomore
I think Sal was in a private school for disciplinary action against unruly or lawbreaking kids. She robbed a convenience store and got caught at the scene.
Catholic School was a cover story – I think.
Andy
Y’know, that’s a good point – Tennessee is the least Catholic state, but there is a diocese of Nashville, with a population of 70,000 Catholics. More than enough to support a boarding school, especially if they get students from out-of-state. But I also like the idea that she was in some kind of court-ordered facility. We’ll have to see what Willis gives us over the next 5 years.
Spencer
It probably was a Catholic school, but I’m not sure about it being court ordered. The way I saw it is that being sent to Tennessee was a thing the Walkertons did on their own.
Can Sal be ordered to an out-of-state boarding school for five years? Even considering the crime she committed that seems really excessive for a juvenile.
thejeff
It may have been some kind of deal to avoid actual jail/juvenile detention.
Spencer
That’s what I’m thinking. My theory is that Blaine, the Siegals and the Walkertons cut a deal so Sal would avoid juvie and Amber wouldn’t have charges pressed against her for stabbing Sal.
inqntrol
Leslie Bean’d favourite place.
JessWitt
Oh was Ana quoting Shortpacked?
inqntrol
No, Hell for certain is in Leslie County, Kentucky. That’s why I brought Leslie in the discussion.
Ana Chronistic
You’re the only one so far who got the community name correct =p
we're already there
There is also one in Michigan,
The story goes that at the town meeting to determine the name some guy stood up and said ‘I don’t care if you call it h***!’ and walked out, so the town took the gauntlet and smacked him with it and named the town such.
Ana Chronistic
That’s Hell, Michigan
Not “Hell for Certain, Kentucky”
Bicycle Bill
I thought it was in Livingston County, MI. At least that’s the one that makes the newscasts in the wintertime when it gets so cold that “Hell has frozen over”.
Disloyal Subject
There are several. I believe the one in Michigan is the one whose welcome sign tends to get photographed while frozen over with icicles.
Marsh Maryrose
Cross-checking USGS “populated places” with Google Maps, we get:
Hell, MI
Hellhole Palms, CA
Helltown, CA
Little Hell, VA
All of these are unincorporated communities, not recognized by the USPS.
TheAnonymousGuy
Kentucky isn’t THAT bad.
Darkoneko
As long as it’s not Hell, Michigan
Falling Star
But…I live in Kentucky.
Ana Chronistic
scroll up some
AustSakuraKyzor
I thought Canada was hell – it’s certainly the right temperature for it
Meng Ling
Hell, Michigan? 😀 Nice place.
butts
Aww, look, Hank’s even tolerating atheists now!
inqntrol
He’s really making progress, isn’t he?
Orion Fury
At this rate he’ll be a regular Christian. Or is it Catholic? To my knowledge it’s not Mormon…
C.
He’s a non-denominational Protestant.
David
He isn’t tolerating Dorothy here as much as not considering her an imminent danger to Joyce’s salvation. I mean, that makes tolerance easier, sure, but it’s not the same thing.
DSL
Hank’s simply discovering there are sufficient numbers and varieties of Hell on Earth without the metaphorical Hell.
Deanatay
Yeah, but at least his fear and mistrust of Dorothy isn’t the knee-jerk fear and mistrust he was raised with, but a NEW fear and mistrust that he’s learned by watching Dorothy interact with his daughter. It’s a step in the right direction, at least?
Doctor_Who
That would imply Dorothy is from hell to begin with. Yet her parents seemed so nice. Maybe the rents in hell are just super reasonable, and it’s a short commute to their jobs.