147

Canada
Posted on September 26, 2012 by David M Willis

147 thoughts on “Canada”

  1. Vivvav

    Yes. That’d be interesting warpaint.

    1. Resne

      I think tattooing it on her knuckles would leave a more lasting impression.

      1. Rognik

        But then she would need to have it tattooed backwards, so the bruise can be read properly. Or would it be tattooed normally, so the bruise can be read more easily in the mirror?

        1. Kintrex

          Clearly you’re living in a more awesome universe than we are, but around here tattoos don’t leave bruises that look like the tattoo.

      2. PotaTOE

        also, I don’t think Ruth has that many knuckles. . .

  2. David Herbert

    Quick Ruth, balance it out by pointing out Billie isn’t as popular as she was in high school.

    1. Jen Aside

      But SHE WAS A CHEERLEADER!!1

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        FORMER Cheerleader.

        1. Yotomoe

          Now if only she was a Transformer Cheerleader. Then maybe she and Joe will hook up.

        2. ASmellyOgre

          But if you say she was a former cheerleader, doesn’t that imply that saying she is a former cheerleader is untrue, meaning she is a cheerleader (but clearly she isn’t)?

        3. GrrArg42

          She must be in a superpositioned state oscillating between the two eigenstates of |being a cheerleader> and |being something else>. Anything else would just be overly complicated.

  3. Yotomoe

    Billie arbitrarily mentioning Walky in a conversation? How very Un-Billie of her.

    1. Sensedog

      I think she cares for him more than she would admit. Or at least understands him on some level.

      1. Blob Marley

        I think she just clings to him because he’s one of the few people that remembers her former status atop the social ladder.

    2. David Herbert

      She loves him, but her pride won’t let her admit it. That’s why Sal always disappears, ’cause Billie’s the sister Walky picked.

      1. Andrew_C

        Don”t you mean”Thats why Sal always disappears, ’cause Walky’s the sibling Billie picked?

  4. Wonder Wig

    Please, my father was killed by french fries.

    1. Yotomoe

      His remains were devoured by Maple Leaves.

      1. GrrArg42

        But that’s where my syrup comes from!! I don’t want blood syrup!

    2. Herohatch

      All that poutine… Never forget.

      1. Rognik

        Curds you! May your whole line be curds until the end of time!

    3. Doctor_Who

      That’d be an interesting origin for Bruce Wayne.

      “I shall strike fear into the hearts of french fries everywhere. They are a salty and un-nutritious lot. I shall become Ketchupman! With my sidekick Malt Vinegar!”

      1. Wonder Wig

        Ketchupman and Malt Vinegar sound like they would do well beside Wonder Wig and Alfredo Boy

      2. Yotomoe

        He’s against frying his foods, after the incident and frowns upon the use of fried batter.

        1. Rognik

          I’m sure the Tempura Wizard would have something to say about that.

      3. Blob Marley

        Ugh, ketchup and vinegar on the same fries? D:

        1. fellixe

          Hmm, Batman vs. Frylock. Hardly seems sporting.

        2. Doctor_Who

          I much prefer just vinegar myself. One reason Five Guys is awesome is they have vinegar for their fries. Just try getting some at frigging McDonalds. And a “regular” fry is a damned meal. A large fry is a banquet. No sense of moderation, those guys.

        3. Historyman68

          And free peanuts!

        4. Hythrain

          And we love them for their total lack of moderation. 😀

        5. Roborat

          Yup, thats the best, when it is malt vinegar. Even better is when you can get some good gravy on there too. I will admit that this is something I picked up when I lived in Ontario, I am looked at strangely when I do this here in Alberta. I draw the line at mayonnaise on fries,however, that is disgusting.

    4. Kernanator

      And my mother died being deep fried and covered in cheese sauce.

  5. LadyIslay

    You mean… all taco bells don’t have french fries?

  6. Doctor_Who

    She was kicked out of Canada for her Ruthiness! And for not liking Tim Horton’s enough!

    1. Mkvenner

      Naw. Robert Pickton was much worse.

      1. Tucker

        Hey-oh!

      2. TPman

        Not cool dude. Also not seeing the relevance, but more relevantly, not cool.

        1. John

          And more heinously, not actually funny.

      3. Spazman

        don’tcha know we aren’t gettin’ your reference, eh?

        1. Andrew_C

          Notorious Canadian serial killer.

        2. Moleman

          Fed his victims to the pigs on his pig farm

        3. Spazman

          Do you mean Mack the Knife?

        4. Narf

          We could tell ya all aboat Robert Pickton, but ya could also try oat usin’ google to do yer own research. Soary to sound rude, but we can’t be doin’ everything for ya, eh? 😛

    2. Rognik

      But wouldn’t that make Canada Ruth-less?

  7. Michael

    American Taco Bell doesn’t have french fries?

    1. Michael

      Also we use the term Quebec fries.

      1. Ziaheart

        Which province/territory are you at?

        1. Michael

          Ontario.

        2. Ziaheart

          Wow. In BC we still call ’em french fries!

        3. Michael

          I was joking

        4. Narf

          My heart is glad that someone fell for that 😀

    2. Todd

      That’s so strange.

      The only reason I go to Taco Bell is for the Supreme Fries

    3. Ancestral Hamster

      No, but its rival Del Taco does.

      1. Michael

        What’s a Del Taco?

        1. Ancestral Hamster

          My original answer has been eaten, and since I don’t want to retype all of it … Del Taco is a US fast food chain similar to Taco Bell, but which also serves standard burgers and fries along with the Americanized Mexican food.

        2. taekwondogirl

          It’s also amazingly awful and super cheap. I have no idea how they turn a profit at all.

        3. begbert2

          It’s amazingly American; if you have no interest in authenticity then it’s as good away as any to get your basic mexican-looking foodstuffs with no spice whatsoever.

          And the super-cheap part doesn’t bother me much either.

        4. taekwondogirl

          I suppose I’m more particular then? Amusingly, I grew up in the Southwest, and I loooove Mexican food. I also like Taco Bell but don’t like Del Taco.

        5. begbert2

          And which I total think should sell Cajun food, since it’s named Delta Co.

    4. Kamino Neko

      LOL, that was my reaction, too.

  8. Mkvenner

    Billie seriously stop drink. It will kill you BEFORE it kills your liver.

    1. Yotomoe

      She won’t stop drink. She like drink. She drink all the time cuz it fun.

      1. Mkvenner

        Even after Ruth uses Billie’s blood as warpaint?

        1. Yotomoe

          If she drunk, then Billie won’t feel pain of the severe cut she get all over her body from Ruth.

        2. blackaeon

          I see what you did there.

        3. cutestupidfox

          Espesialy after Roth uses her blood as warpaint as its probebly her blood now… booze blood.

    2. Wonder Wig

      Kills my liver? I hardly know her!

    3. Rognik

      It’s not the drink that’ll kill her, but her mouth. Which may or may not be related, now that I think about it. But still, check your words before you check your diet.

  9. JoeMerl

    “They stopped serving the French fries…and that’s when I knew there was nothing holding me there anymore.” *violin music*

    1. Yotomoe

      French Fries was such a good customer, But the waitresses refused to serve him cuz he was greasy and fatty.

  10. Clementine

    Paint it on her FAAAACE

    1. Drunken Nordmann

      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hVpg0vws10Y&feature=g-u-u
      Like that?

  11. jkasd

    I just finished roomies, its walky, and joyce and walky, and also caught up on shortpacked. May I just say… WOW

    1. Undrave

      Didn’t you say that YESTERDAY?

      1. GrrArg42

        We’re caught in an Escher Time Loop! Run in circles for your lives!!

      2. Pat

        But every time there’s a new comic, you have to finish it AGAIN!
        We’ll never be done… unless…

        1. Rognik

          Unless? Unless what? Good grief, (wo)man, finish your thought!

  12. Wack'd

    “I stole your property, blackmailed you with it, kept you in a constant state of fear and panic and have now entered your living space uninvited. Please be considerate of my feelings.”

    1. Historyman68

      And that’s what we call an uneven power dynamic

    2. Pat

      “It’s the proper way to make sure I’m still here when the police arrive.”

  13. Uniqueantique

    Some kind of record here? They are sitting side by side and still talking…just talking. No hitting. No name calling. Yet?

    1. Yotomoe

      She’s killing her softly with her words.

    2. coobee

      No touching. No kissing. Yet?

      1. Khrene

        We gotta here Ruths sad backstory, as she must open her heart before she opens her legs.

  14. Doctor_Who

    Does the 97 on Billie’s shirt have any significance, or is it just a number?

    Perhaps it’s 9 7 and those are the scores her breasts get. Looks like lefty needs to catch up.

    1. Yotomoe

      It’s a scoreboard. The number goes up everytime she has sex.

      1. Ancestral Hamster

        And that’s just today’s total!

        1. Jackson

          She had one for beers, but the number no longer fits on the shirt.

    2. Wack'd

      1997, or Roomies! Year One.

      I’ve seen lots of folks on campus with random numbers on their shirts, so I guess it works in-universe.

      1. GrrArg42

        The day I see one with 42 I will dance.

      2. Historyman68

        Yeah Willis confirmed it in the book! Which I just got (a few weeks ago)! And it is awesome!

  15. Tucker

    Look, a non-timeframe specific flat-panel!

    1. Wack'd

      YEARS could go by in that panel and we’d never know.

  16. Thisguy

    Can’t stop looking at the second panel… Either Billie’s leg is horribly disfigured, or her ass is completely concentrated in her right cheek.

    1. Brasca1

      I think it’s a bean bag chair which would partially obscure the bottom half of anyone sitting in it.

    2. taekwondogirl

      Oooor, you know, foreshortening is hard to draw and doesn’t always work as intended.

  17. LBD "Nytetrayn"

    KFC has the fries, too.

    1. GrrArg42

      Toothless!!! Whoh,whoh, whoh; and where do you think you’re going?

  18. RandomNameGen

    I feel the need to watch the movie “Canadian Bacon.”

  19. Raen

    “It started with this boy named Todd…”

    1. GrrArg42

      Who used to go fishing for cod…

      1. Originalslugboy

        He forgot to bring bait…

        1. Kryss LaBryn

          But then shouted, “Wait!”

        2. davidbreslin101

          “I can multiply fish, ‘cos I’m God!”

        3. GrrArg42

          WHOOOH!! Go Team Go! All of you rock my socks.

  20. Undrave

    Ruth came down from the frozen north to kick ass and pick up chicks!

    And Billie, she’s fresh out of asses.

    1. Spazman

      Well, to be fair, Billie’s ass should last her her a good, long while

      1. Rognik

        It is a very bad ass.

  21. John

    It’s true. It’s all true. The fries supreme is amazing. We also have the ‘cheesy gordita crunch’ which is a hard taco supreme in a soft taco with melted cheese between the taco shells.

    1. Vincent

      Finally! The important question has been answered. Now I can move on with my life.

    2. blackaeon

      So does the US.

    3. Marshall Erickson

      Tacos with fries… why didin’t I think of that?

  22. L

    …So she left Canada in shame because Canadian Taco Bells have french fries instead of papas horneadas al pastor?

    1. Ziaheart

      … horny potatoes of the priest?

      I need to brush up on my Spanish.

      1. King Of Budgies

        Shepherd-style baked potatoes.

      2. L

        Shepherd baked potatoes, regular baked potatoes with Shepherd style meat and sauce on them.

        “Horneada” means “[female] baked”, from “Horno” which means oven in Spanish. Pastor means shepherd in Spanish (and Latin I think), I guess that’s why christian religions use it as “Priest”.

        1. begbert2

          And it’s where English gets ‘pastoral’.

          But I still like Ziaheart’s guess better.

        2. Ziaheart

          Learning new things is fun! And now I want to get some… horny fries of the priest. It’s like Shepherd’s pie except not mashed?

  23. coobee

    Wow, Ruth’s face is alarmingly adorable and vulnerable in that second panel. Love all this slowly unpeeling backstory, sigh Willis your storytelling is so masterful 🙂

  24. Jimmy

    Taco Bells in Canada have fries? Now I want to take a road trip to Canada just to find out how good the Taco Bell fries are!

    1. Narf

      They are delicious. I just saved you a lot of gas. 😛

  25. Sporky

    I think this is the most blatant Walkyverse callback there’s been in the strip so far.

  26. Gordon Blvd

    in Canada, milk comes in BAGS!!!

    1. kaixa

      Our meth comes from their Asian drug gangs!

    2. taekwondogirl

      This was the thing that threw me for the biggest loop.

  27. Gordon Blvd

    in Canada, you get TWO pizzas for the price of ONE!!! http://www.canadian2for1pizza.com/

    1. Pat

      So they charge you double for one pizza as a way to get you to buy two?

  28. Dr.Z

    Jeez, Ruth.

    That was a good opportunity to change the conversation without losing momentum. Ya should have embraced it.

    1. davidbreslin101

      This conversation has more “inertia” than “momentum”: you’d need rocket engines to get it moving.

  29. Bill Murphy

    Ohh, look at who’s getting all sensitive now…

  30. Jehosaphat

    Ooo Canada… Ruth’s home and native land! No Patriot love in all thy Ruth…

  31. begbert2

    It seems that Billie’s either lost all sense of self-preservation, or her short-term memory is *really* bad. Ruth is the devil, remember Billie?

    This is what happens when you drink your weight in beer, folks.

    1. Jackson

      You’ll have to remind me when Billie ever had a sense of self-preservation.

      I mean, maybe she does. I’ve been known to forget things. But I’d have to be reminded.

      1. begbert2

        Well, for a while (as lately as three comics ago) she had a pants-wetting terror on about Ruth, which was a rational self-preservative opinion to have since Ruth was displaying every characteristic of a stalkerish psychopath who had chosen her next kill. Five minutes later she’s exchanging small-talk with the woman. Um, what?

        1. Jackson

          Gotcha. I was just recalling the lunch incident where Billie provoked Sarah to knock her own lunch tray to the floor in rage, and then her own counter-antagonism toward Ruth (with Sal, with the blackmail beer photo…). In all that, I’d completely forgotten last Friday’s strip. I think my short-term memory is broken.

          Yeah…Billie seems to vacillate between extreme overconfidence when she thinks she’s got the upper hand against Ruth, and abject terror when she thinks she’s hopelessly outgunned. It’s feast or famine; it’s a fine line.

  32. LionHeart

    How can you not have french fries in your Taco Bells?!

    Savages!

  33. OmegaDez

    Oh, those damn french fries. I hate how you have to pay extra to replace them with nacho chips and cheese.

  34. Bionic

    So… what do Americans eat with their tacos instead of french fries?
    I had no idea we were so lucky. I mean, with regard to taco side dishes.

    1. blackaeon

      Our superior American tacos need no side dishes. You’re really hungry, you buy a ten pack, eat six and throw the other four away. Amerrrrrrrrrrica! *flies off into the waving-flag-superimposed sunset on a bald eagle firing assault weapons into the air*

      1. Narf

        I’m almost positive I see what you did there, but if I do not, then you are terrifying. 😛

  35. Animal

    Walky should try Puerto Rico. Down there everything comes with fries.

  36. Will

    I’ve been wondering why Ruth had a Leafs jersey. They share the same sort of fanatic devotion despite decades of never winning a championship that the Chicago Cubs have. Minus half a century or so.

    As far as Taco Bell, almost every store I’ve been to has been merged with a KFC. So yeah, there’s technically fries available, but I’m not sure they’re Taco Bell’s specifically. This might just be an East Coast thing, mind you.

    1. Norah

      Not just East Coast. We have at least one Tacoma Bell and KFC combo store in Seattle.

  37. Norah

    Taco Bell, not Tacoma.

  38. Volkai

    Only just now noticed the new, larger banner – and the canadian hockey jersey Ruth’s wearing in it.

    Any chance Dumbiverse Ruth had a high school classmate named Ceilidh?

    (Let’s see if I remember how to HTML in a link!)

    1. Jen Aside

      Sal might’ve!

  39. Mally

    Losing the deliciousness that was Taco Bell’s fries, particularly their Supreme Fries? And then finding out they still had them in Canada? Definitely sore subject.

    I missed those fries. They were the one thing Taco Bell had that could compete with Del Taco.

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