244

Hospital
Posted on October 21, 2011 by David M Willis

244 thoughts on “Hospital”

  1. Henry

    Amazi-Girl is about to f–k Ryan’s shizz up!

    1. Henry

      Oh God, I didn’t just…?

      1. David Herbert

        Yes, and you will be shunned for it.

        1. Henry

          *Cries in a corner*

        2. Jacob

          Wow, dodged a bullet there, didn’t I?

        3. Henry

          You have no idea. As for me, the consequences will never be the same…

        4. kagato23

          You dun goofed.

        5. Ancestral Hamster

          Excuse me, but why the stigma for being first in a David Willis webcomic?

          (Although at least people aren’t competing to post a worthless FIRST!!! post as is the case elsewhere.)

        6. David

          They do sometimes. I delete those posts.

        7. T Campbell

          @David: THE IRONY

        8. Ancestral Hamster

          @David Willis: Ah, I just thought DoA fans were above that sort of thing. Another illusion shattered.

        9. Zuche

          Willis: the Irony could have potential as a game.

        10. bassclefjeff

          The videogame should be “Willis: The ironing is delicious”.

        11. PedanticJerkass

          @Ancestral Hamster

          Given all the idiotic memes that are perpetuated here on a daily basis, you actually thought “DoA fans were above that sort of thing”? Seriously?

        12. Daeva

          Already back-tracing it to the cyber police, dude…sorry, but such is the way of the internet.

        13. Henry

          Well, when they come for me, I’ll just ask them not to hit me in the FAAAAAAAAACE, I guess.

        14. Rex Hondo

          No, don’t. Pleading for mercy with the Bat-Corps (no affiliation with Batman Inc.) only enrages them once Sarah Protocol has been activated.

        15. Henry

          What if I invoke Batman in my defense?

        16. Rex Hondo

          Most likely they’ll think you’re being a smartass. Really, your best bet is to go fetal with your hands over your head before they can get a really good whack at anything vital. Whimper a lot and maybe void yourself and they should be convinced you’ve learned your lesson.

        17. Henry

          Why would I make myself invalid for them? (That is what ‘void’ means, right? :p )

        18. turkishproverb

          *shuns*

  2. Jacob

    The manhunt begins…

    1. MichaelHaneline

      How far could the douchebag go? He’s just had the shit beaten out of him with a baseball bat.

      1. brasca1

        If he traveled by car as far as it will take him. It would be painful and the head injury would be disorienting, but if he can make it far enough away to avoid any pursuers he’s home free because unfortunately Joyce wants to sleep this off which will eliminate any evidence of her being drugged. Like I said yesterday absent of evidence and more than two witnesses he could press charges against Sarah for assault and battery.

        1. turkishproverb

          If he’s traveling by car, I’m hoping the disorientation leads him directly to a brick wall, and an unbuckled seat-belt.

        2. Wandering Meme

          Assuming he doesn’t have transmission trouble. He seems to be having a string of bad luck tonight.

      2. ryan

        if he has slasher powers, that doesn’t mean anything.

        1. Moonshine McGee

          He wasn’t even superpowered in the other comics. On the other hand, neither was Amber, and we’ve gotten no evidence that she’s completely human in this one, so maybe… nah.

    2. darcos0

      shit’s gotten serious

      1. Jackson

        Shit’s gotten babies.

    3. Wackd

      No we hunt…the most dangerous game…

      1. Zuche

        Monopoly?

        1. Asuka L.S.

          No, lawn darts.

        2. Zuche

          Right. I always forget about that one.

        3. Jerricho

          No, this is the most dangerous game.

    4. Wandering Meme

      love panels 1 and 2.
      I can even hear the theme song.

      Amazi-girl: “I’m Batman.”

  3. cappadocius

    Actually, Dorothy, it is, in fact, THAT FUCKING SIMPLE.

    1. ViralBiae

      Wait. She knows something we don’t… WHAT COULD THIS MEAN??? WHAT DOES DOROTHY KNOW THAT WE DON’T KNOW!? ANSWER ME, DAMN YOU WILLIS!

      1. Henry

        Gotta wait till Monday!

        1. Jacob

          That gravatar makes that comment so much better.

      2. Valdrax

        What she means is that this douche is on the loose somewhere, and without being locked up, he might try this again or come back for revenge.

        1. isitsevenyet

          No, I think there’s more to it than that, given how she stuttered.

          I suspect he’s related to Dorothy somehow. Or perhaps she had a run-in with him in the past.

        2. Aydr

          I suspect that she feels awful and feels worse about telling her that Joyce has to go to the hospital because a) she might be in more danger than it appears and b) justice has to be served here, and part of that is having her story come out.

        3. Henry

          That’s probably part of why she’s telling Joyce it’s not so simple; if Joyce just sleeps it off, the evidence might be gone before it can be used. She needs to go to the hospital to make sure it gets recorded that she has been drugged, so they can take Ryan’s ass down in court.

        4. fellixe

          I think it is B. This is a journalistic integrity thing. She can’t see participating in a coverup, particularly if Ryan is still out there and she has to way keeping it quiet against her duty to inform the public about a threat.

        5. fellixe

          *Please replace ‘way’ with ‘weigh’. That is all.

        6. Bekah

          I think it’s both

        7. Khrene Cleaver

          Plus man, I doubt she wants a violent rapist to be able to get away plus be able to charge Sarah for assault and battery, and possibly attempted murder, dunno if a bat counts legally as a deadly weapon but one good home run can kill. I
          m honestly surprised he got up.

      3. Robert

        Well lets see, for starters a woman was almost raped, it’s an illegal frat party, it happened under the watch of congresswoman DeSanto’s younger sister and finally the assalient hasn’t been apprehended.

        1. Zuche

          It’s like the Fatty Arbuckle scandal all over again.

      4. Wandering Meme

        tune in next week as…

        No srsly tho, bad move on joyce’s part. Secks offenders needs to be reported on, and arrested so they end up in a cell block 69 with some big black dude named “Tiny Down-Low” or “Jackie Sodomy” who needs his hair braided.

    2. Nifar

      Depending on what douchebag used, and how much, it might not be. There’s a decent chance Joyce needs to get to a hospital so that she doesn’t end up comatose or something.

      1. vlademir1

        Thank you.

        I was about to just say, “Dorothy’s first line Monday should be something to the effect of, ‘If I don’t, God is taking you home and you’re never coming back.'”

        1. TheBenenator

          This. This. All over this.

        2. Jackson

          Do we still have some internets to give this fine person? We haven’t used them all up, have we? When are we due our next shipment of internets?

    3. sun tzu

      NO. IT’S. NOT.
      If Joyce buries this story, the bastard gets to rape again. So no, it’s not that simple.

      1. AndysDrawings

        Also there’s the part where Joyce stabbed him with broken glass and Sarah assaulted him with a baseball bat for something he technically hadn’t done yet. And still hasn’t.

        1. Pat

          The first time Sarah hit him she was defending Joyce. The second time was maybe battery.

          Hitting someone for something they *have* done is vengeance; you’re supposed to leave punishment to the police. It’s when they haven’t done it yet that you *are* allowed to hit them.

        2. Kintrex

          Yeah but if you don’t have evidence then it’s assault. They need to get Joyce to the hospital to prove that she was drugged.

        3. Pat

          That doesn’t change whether her actions were legal, just whether she can prove it.

        4. wererat2000

          assault. battery is verbal abuse.

        5. Elephant

          Technically, assault is when you threaten someone with violence. Battery is actually hitting them.

          @Pat: The role of the police isn’t to punish; that’s the job of the courts.

        6. Pat

          Yeah, I got a little ramble-y and more detailed and verbose than I needed to be, so I trimmed it down.
          I realized immediately that I hadn’t done it quite right and should have said “leave punishment to the *legal system*” instead of “police”, but I figured that maybe if I didn’t draw attention to it nobody would notice.

          Curses.

        7. Pat

          That is not correct.

      2. turkishproverb

        There are ways to keep him from raping again.

        They could remove his “weapons” for a start.

        1. Zuche

          I don’t think he has weapons. Not the concealed type anyway. Not as the J. Geils Band meant it, at least.

          (Don’t look it up. It was an awful song, to say nothing of the video.)

        2. turkishproverb

          He has weapons. Below the belt. They need to be removed. Painfully.

        3. Zuche

          When the joke goes over your head, even after the reference is provided, because you’re too busy grinding your axe, you need to put the axe down and step away from it.

        4. Asuka L.S.

          “I don’t think he has weapons. Not the concealed type anyway.”

          You mean he airs his testicles in PUBLIC?!!

  4. Jen Aside

    “Man, if my parents found out I almost died, they might not want me to almost die again!”

    Well, yeah.

    1. Henry

      Actually, I’d be seeing some character development opportunity there; she might find herself *gasp* disagreeing with her parents and having to convince them to let her stay at IU.

      1. Rex Hondo

        Given her severely fundamentalist Christian, home-schooled upbringing, “Honour thy father and thy mother” is probably far too deeply ingrained for her to even consider defying her parents directly if they directly order her to return home.

        1. Henry

          That’s why I feel like she’d try to convince them that that wasn’t a good idea. Which would still, in some way, be standing up to them; gradual development, without outright rebellion.

        2. Jackson

          That’s a good point, Henry. You can certainly disagree with your parents while still honoring them.

          Your remarks about rebelling lead me to wonder, though: is it possible to disobey someone without dishonoring them? I’m honestly not sure. You’d certainly not be honoring their commands. Perhaps this is why Ephesians 6:1 says, “Children, obey your parents in the Lord.” (But even then, there’s still the question of whether Paul is commanding the children to obey their parents once they grow up and become adults…)

        3. Pat

          If the situation is different from what the order-giver believed, whether because it has changed or because you have information that they lacked, obeying the order anyway may be foolish.

          And that’s even before you get to the fact that order-givers give *bad* orders sometimes.

        4. Jackson

          Immediately after asking the question, I thought of Martin Luther King Jr.. Question almost seems to answer itself now.

        5. Asuka L.S.

          It certainly is possible to disobey direct orders without dishonoring the order giver. Ask all the grunts in the Army. They salute the dumbass Lieutenant, listen to the spiel, then promptly do things the right way. Lieutenant looks good, job gets done, everyone wins. ^__^

          This is more of a running joke than truth, just so people don’t dive for my throat.

        6. Bekah

          I dunno… I went to Catholic School (not as deeply fundy as Joyce’s home-schooling, I agree), and when we did our catechism stuff in preparation for confirmation, we learned that “Honour thy father and mother” does not mean “Blindly obey everything they tell you.”

        7. Rex Hondo

          Well, the difference, as I see it (and I honestly don’t mean to offend. Last thing I want to start is a religion debate/flame-war) is that, the Catholic school is trying to reinforce the Church as the ultimate authority and only true conduit to God. They don’t want you blindly obeying your parents because what’s to keep them from telling you something different from what the Pope says?
          Joyce’s parents, on the other hand, have more of a vested interest in (and ability to, being her only teachers up to this point) making themselves the ultimate earthly authority in Joyce’s life.

        8. Nagaoka

          I, too, went to Catholic school and I can assure you that we never were made to bow to “Dear Leader”. The Pope isn’t higher than God or the commandments. Look at our history, blind obedience of church officials has led to some very…VERY bad things happening and we know it (even if, sadly, some people want to hide it). No, the teachers generally encouraged us to think for ourselves and pray or get advice from a trusted source about anything we might be conflicted about. Honestly where are you getting this from?

        9. Rex Hondo

          Papal Infallibility. I certainly never meant to imply that the Church places the Pope above God, but it does definitely establish itself and the Pope as the sole earthly arbiter of God’s divine will. And a simple look at even recent history shows how intent the Church is to control its membership.
          I will concede, however, that a dig at Catholic schools was unwarranted, since one need not be Catholic, or even Christian to teach there, so long as one does not blatantly contradict Church doctrine. My admittedly dim view of the Catholic church (as an organization. I know quite a few Catholics who are actually very reasonable people) doesn’t extend to teachers just looking for work. How they TREAT their teachers is another matter I won’t go into now…
          Ultimately, though, what was supposed to be my main point stands. Fundies tend to be very controlling. Home-schoolers tend to be very controlling. Home-schooling fundies are very likely to be mind-warpingly controlling.

        10. airfox

          Catholic here too. And that bit about the church about the ultimate authority? Not true.

          I think it’s very common to find Catholics who even dislike the pope.

          (Sorry for the english up there. I’m not sure it’s that a sentence where I should’ve used ‘whom’ instead)

          -airfox

        11. turkishproverb

          Yea, but American protestant groups often treat Catholicism as as bad or worse than “those evil Muslims”.

        12. turkishproverb

          So I’m not sure the strictness of a catholic school is a good argument.

      2. Fauxlosopher

        BING

        Rebellion against parents, as was discussed prior. Like, what, three weeks ago IRL?

    2. Plasma Mongoose

      It’s not like she would be foolish enough to let this happen again, she will be a lot more suspicious about any drinks or ‘christains’ she meets in the future.

      1. Wandering Meme

        prolly still be husband hunting though. she’ll just have to study up on how to deal with Secks offenders.

        …sooooo, one of those horns? or a pocket sized “switch”, since you’re not opposed to violence?

  5. David Herbert

    If Joyce is over 18, her parents won’t be contacted.

    1. katie01

      That’s only if the school (assuming they’re informed) doesn’t require students to provide emergency contact information.

      Of course, I can only speak for my school, which is more obsessed with student safety than with just about anything else.

    2. iSaidCandleja-

      Depends on her parent’s insurance coverage really.

    3. rjaco321

      at my school, if you lived in campus housing they contacted your parents regardless. unless of course you were paying for it yourself and they had no record of parents to call.

    4. ShifterComic

      Maybe if Joyce wasn’t a student her parents wouldn’t be contacted. But if someone who works for the school found out what happened to her at the party, they would be obligated to let her parents know.

      1. Pat

        Actually, if she’s a legal adult I believe they *can’t* unless she’s given them permission. Not that Joyce would refuse such permission, but she might not have bothered to give it.

        1. Mickeyten

          In balance, any school will probably err on the side of informing the parents, who are more likely than the students to sue them.

  6. NCP19

    Huh, I just now noticed blood on Joyce’s hair.

    1. Valdrax

      Oh, nice. I noticed it in this strip but didn’t notice until I went back just how many days its been there.

      UNLESS WILLIS IS GASLIGHTING US ALL.

      1. fellixe

        Bloody hand applied to spinning head = blood in hair.

      2. taekwondogirl

        She probably put her hand to her head. Her hand has blood on it. Simple, really.

        1. Valdrax

          She did. Same strip that Sarah showed up.

      3. NakedDumblydore

        Nope, it’s been there from the beginning. No “What kind of ninja wears bright red?” action here.

        1. Ancestral Hamster

          Q: What kind of ninja wears bright red?
          A: A very good one. Anyone can sneak around in black.

        2. Valdrax

          Well, have you ever seen a ninja wearing bright red?
          That’s just how good they are.

        3. NakedDumblydore

          I suspect my clever 8-bit reference has gone unnoticed.

  7. MarcinMN

    Go Amazi-Girl! 😉

    1. Gargamel

      *Symbol Spins* 😀

  8. Doctor_Who

    Joyce is taking this surprisingly well. Hearing that Dorothy is an atheist? That shook her world.

    Getting drugged by an attempted rapist? She’ll sleep it off.

    1. Henry

      She’s barely coherent. The drugs are probably what’s keeping her subdued. That’s sort of part of the point of Ryan drugging her in the first place.

  9. Oruncrest

    “Probably a broken rib or two…”

    And Here I Thought you were stomping on his head.

    Maybe if you had, he’d still be curled up into a fetal ball…

    1. TheBenenator

      She was channeling the Mario Bros. Stomping on heads damages the entire body!

      1. Wackd

        She was seen to be ambiguously stepping on him in a panel or two. So there’s that.

  10. Larson E. Jones

    YAY! Joyce wants to stay.

    Even though she doesn’t understand how DOMESTIC VIOLENCE works.

    1. Swissaboo

      this violence wasn’t domestic

      1. Valdrax

        I know, ironic amirite?

      2. TheBenenator

        Well, it wasn’t overseas, either.

        1. AndysDrawings

          +1

      3. adius

        Her home is the comic, and it will probably hurt her again~

    2. ShifterComic

      She’s been drugged. She’s not exactly rational right now.

      1. Zuche

        It’s a David Willis comic. No one is exactly rational even at the best of times. 😉

    3. Rex Hondo

      A quick look back at Joyce’s date with Joe would indicate that she does, in fact, have a functioning knowledge of domestic violence.

  11. iSaidCandleja-

    I like that look in panel 2, it says “Let’s get dangerous!“

    1. Jacob

      And Sarah looks royally pissed. Is she mad at Ryan or Amazi-Girl now?
      After all, her ‘attention-hogging’ let him get away in the first place.

      1. iSaidCandleja-

        She’s mad because she was right about this party. She hates being right all the time.

      2. Valdrax

        Sarah is never mad at things. Her anger is so elemental and omnipresent, that you can only describe her as having the emotion of anti-anger at select objects to describe when her emotional state deviates from its natural rest state of hot fury.

        1. Sagara S.

          I like that phrasing. I shall use it to describe my friend’s roommate. It will be good. And I shall wear a sombrero.

        2. Cybersnark

          Basically, Sarah is Bonecrusher.

    2. lightsabermario

      I am the terror that flaps in the night,
      I am your favorite webcomic that just went on hiatus,
      I am Amazi-Girl!

  12. Daeva

    Go get ‘im, Amazi-Girl! Show him how immune to criticism your fists are!

  13. Lady Kwake

    Joyce, sweety, you are BLEEDING, and I’m willing to bet at least one of those cuts needs some stitching. There isn’t a lot of stuff holding your hand together besides your skin after all.

    (I know this because my first week of culinary school I stupidly sliced open the skin between my thumb and forefinger with a very sharp knife. Wasn’t bleeding much so I got a good look at my muscels, tendons, etc. Which was really interesting, but very queezy making.)

    1. Jacob

      And now she’s bleeding all over Dorothy’s phone.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Bloodberry?

      2. fellixe

        Is there an app for that?

        1. Plasma Mongoose

          If they had a shake-a-baby app, then it is entirely possible for them to have an app for that too. 😀

        2. Zuche

          Shake-a-baby app? Is this supposed to be an alternative for parents that don’t want to sing Rock-a-Bye Baby to their howling newborns?

        3. Rex Hondo

          No, it’s much, MUCH worse than that.

      3. Fauxlosopher

        Yeah, I noticed that too. I was about to be all like DAMNIT JOYCE QUIT BLEEDING ON PEOPLE’S THINGS!

        But what I think happened here is she glassed Ryan, Ryan bled on the glass, the blood got on her hand, and she put her hand to her head. All the visible blood is Ryan’s if I’m not mistaken. Fact check for me, I’m too drunk to be reliable right now.

        1. Pat

          I think so, but she IS (or at least WAS) holding a broken glass and she’s disoriented. She could have cut herself, but probably not severely.

        2. Shay

          Oh great. Cut on hands + Ryan’s flying blood…. who knows what diseases he has.

        3. Pat

          She might have cut herself with the same object she cut him with. Does it matter that his blood was flying? It was on the glass.

          I did think of that, and it might be part of Dorothy’s concern, but…

        4. Fauxlosopher

          Yeah, now that I’m sober, I looked back. She definitely has a decent little slice on her palm.

    2. Asuka L.S.

      THANK YOU! I’m so glad I’m not the only one who finds examining wounds to be interesting. The fact is that the body is just a biological machine, and all that blood is just the motor oil. It’s perfectly natural to want to look at the parts of the machine and see how they interact. Especially since the machine is YOU.

  14. gaspacho

    Hey Amazi-Girl, wanna borrow Sarah’s car? Maybe run Ryan over a few (dozen) times?

    1. Henry

      Run into would-be-rapist.

      Put car in reverse and hit him again.

      1. fellixe

        “Better be sure that was him.”
        *Badupadump*
        “Yep, that WAS him. My work is done here!”
        *Badumpadump, varoooom*

        1. turkishproverb

          Don’t you mean *badumpSPLORCH!* *Vroom*

      2. Rex Hondo

        Preferably while humming the theme to Peter Gunn.

        1. Fauxlosopher

          With Jake and Elwood in the car?

  15. meanderling

    Man, Joyce is a trooper. Didn’t expect her to be quite so badass.

    1. Bekah

      Her current behaviour is not badass. It’s stupid.

      1. Sagara S.

        agreed. I had a roommate in freshman year that was a sever alky, and on Spring Weekend (insert ominous music since this is UCONN) she became so wasted that the in-dorm nursing students said, and I quote “Now, normally, this is like three times past what we want you to call 911 for, but since so many people tonight will be more wasted, we want you to just watch her for the next nine hours and if she blacks out, call me”.
        said roommate blacked out twice, fell on me from her bed and blew my knee out, and tried to climb out a window, all because we couldn’t call 911 and have them deal with her.

      2. gangler

        The pills probably weren’t supposed to bring out her baddass and intelligent side.

        ….. is that even a kind of pill? Perhaps some form of encapsulated essence of Bruce Willis? If there is that’s totally not what he gave her.

        1. Rex Hondo

          Wasn’t that a movie a few months back? Or just a running gag from those seasons of Family Matters that were really just The Wacky Adventures of Steve Urkel…

        2. gangler

          Trailer: “A seemingly normal girl. A seemingly normal rapist. An ordinary day like any other, but this time something’s different. This time he’s unbelievably, terribly bad at this.

          *Shots of Joyce punching him out. Shots of Ryan crawling away as the Ambulance carts Joyce off. Reaches for a bag of pills and stares shocked at something only he’s seeing.*

          “Well we’ve just run some tests on your friend and come up with some curious results. There’s some Miraclo in here. Some Bloody Eye. Little bit of Mutant Growth Hormone. Some kind of Venom/Blockbuster formula compound. A couple dozen plasmids, but nope. Clean of any date rape drugs.”

          *Boom* “This Summer” *Boom* “He fucked up” *Boom* “She’s out for revenge” *Boom* “Crime and Punishment: Coming summer of 2013”

        3. Karishi

          Limitless was more or less about that idea. There’s a pretty awesome review of it over on NeedCoffee.
          But I think what people are mistaking for “badass” or “keeping it together” is her current drug-induced inability to express concern, which is sometimes how downers hit you and makes all kinds of sense for how a date rape drug would hit someone before they pass out from it.

  16. Eggy

    Describing Ryan’s injuries makes Sarah *angry*.

  17. Leon

    I have to say, I was among the one’s who thought Joyce would sequester herself after this experience. I was wrong; it seems she’s more afraid of her parents sheltering her.
    I reckon she will be attending parties again sooner than we’d expect, with a little less naïvette.

  18. Eve

    Joyce, you have no idea what and just as important how much was in that drink, so you don’t actually know if you’ll be fine. You may not choose to report what happened but a doctor would definately be something you need to see.

    1. ryan

      joyce doesn’t need a hospital when J.C. has her back.

      1. Andy

        Very true. When she lays her soul to rest, she’s gonna go to the place that’s the best.

        1. Zuche

          Wow, it’s like today is Old Song Reference Day or something. Well played.

      2. Rex Hondo

        Oh God, don’t let Joyce be a Christian Scientist…

  19. NakedDumblydore

    “It’s not that simple. You’re bleeding on my phone. I need to make sure you don’t have Hep C.”

    1. fellixe

      “People saw you with a Cootie-catcher. We have to be sure you didn’t actually catch any.”

  20. Jimbo

    i squee everytime i see amazi-girl!

  21. Andy

    I’m starting to hate Fridays.

    1. Karishi

      You’re like the anti-Garfield.

  22. Kernanator

    Joyce, honey, this isn’t a story where you can deal with anything just by being stubborn enough. Well, this is a story, but not that kind of story.

  23. Derek

    Wow, this comic actually raises a rather controversial (I’m not sure if it’s the right word, interesting??) topic.

    If they tell the police about Ryan against Joyce’s wishes, they are telling the community that he’s a date-rapist and everyone will be fore-warned about what a piece of sh-t he is.
    But at the same time, they would be violating Joyce’s right to privacy, and that’s something you have to careful around a rape or sexual assault case. Joyce might actually be more broken up from the repercussions to her reputation than the attack itself (depending on how similar she is to It’s Walky! Joyce).

    Personally I think they SHOULD tell the police, but I would feel really bad for Joyce.

    1. AndysDrawings

      Somebody else slipping sedatives into your drink can give you a reputation?

      What a country!

      1. turkishproverb

        America, love it or leave it.

        …Yea, I’m still looking for the Door.

        1. begbert2

          It’s south, if you go far enough. Or north, if you can convince the border gaurds you’re just visiting. Ore east or west, if you’re a good swimmer. Or up or down, if you can handle pressure&temperature extremes and hold your breath/dig really well.

      2. fellixe

        The reputation comes from the assumptions people make. Like folks assuming Christian+home-schooled=fundamentalist. In the case of the attempted rape people may assume that if she was at a party and something was slipped into her drink by a guy she was with that she must have been throwing down alcohol and trying to hook up with someone at the time.

        1. Brendan

          But she IS a fundie. Just because she’s not out there protesting gay funerals doesn’t make her “not a fundie.” She hears Dorothy is an atheist and reacts like she’s a Martian; how sheltered do you have to be never to have encountered an ATHEIST?!

          And if she thinks her parents will give up her future out of nothing but fear that lightning will strike again, that’s some fundie bullshit right there.

        2. G.S.Mercs

          Actually, I never encountered anyone who described themself as an Atheist until near the very end of grade 12, and I went to public school my entire life and had no religious affiliations. And even then, I only met the person because they were picking up a relative. Had it not been for that, I may not have met my first Atheist until University.

        3. icepyrox

          I went to public school. I held a job out among the masses since I was 15. If it wasn’t for my dad’s girlfriend/wife/whatever, I would not have knowingly met an atheist until I was 26. (Some people used the term, but upon further discussion they were agnostic or just trying to rebel).

          And Ryan is proof that regardless of how fundie your parents are, it doesn’t mean you are.

          I think Joyce is at this college to learn about the world (culture) as much as to learn about the world (knowledge). She knows she was sheltered and wants to prove she doesn’t have to be sheltered to prove her beliefs. She tends to use the labels as an attempt at humor, not as a statement of belief, despite them being her belief.

    2. katzgoboom

      Well, part of the reason victims of sexual assault get so touchy about their experiences being exposed/talked about is because it’s kind of triggering, no matter how it’s done. Unless someone brings it up directly TO YOU…no, no they do NOT want to talk about their sexual assault.

      So yes, outing Ryan as a rapist and a douche in general may SEEM like the right idea, you have to remember that outing the douchebag is not the only aspect — so part of me leans with the whole “respect Joyce’s right to privacy”. She’s this sheltered fundie — needless reminders will not be good to her psyche.

      At the same time, if they take her to a doctor, it’s not necessarily a campus doctor so the doctor won’t have to report it to the school and they’ll have evidence from the hospital to use against Ryan — I’m pretty sure whatever they’d use to test for drugs would be able to test for blood alcohol level as well.

      1. Allie

        It’s a crime. Crimes are a violation of the entire community, not just one person. It’s more than Joyce’s decision. But since we’re discussing Joyce, her cowardice and selfishness makes her responsible for every future victim of Ryan’s.

        1. Elephant

          Talk about blame-the-victim…

        2. Rex Hondo

          I wouldn’t go so far as to say “responsible.” Every person is responsible for their own actions. If she fails to report the attack, she certainly becomes complicit in any of his future attacks, however. Heck, she’s asking everybody there to be complicit in THIS attack by not reporting it.

      2. begbert2

        Except, unlike most sexual assaults, nothing actually happened to Joyce that she would be traumatized about. So that angle doesn’t apply to her.

        1. begbert2

          Wow, missed closing tag (after ‘happening’) makes me much more vehement.

        2. NakedDumblydore

          Yeah, getting drugged and pinned against a wall and having to fight off her attacker and get saved by her friends is nothing. Nothing at all.

        3. Jackson

          If I were Joyce, I might well be just as traumatized by gashing my attacker’s face with a broken glass as by anything else that happened.

        4. katzgoboom

          Assuming that pretty much assures that Joyce will feel more trauma than necessary. Assuming Joyce will fee fine after someone pulled probably the first aggressive move toward her person in her entire life means she won’t get the emotional support she NEEDS and she’ll feel worse.

          Victim-blaming takes many forms.

  24. NinjaNick

    Amazi-Girl will ninja attack Ryan! Go, Amazi-Girl, GO!!!

    1. Rex Hondo

      If it’s a ninja attack you’re looking for, what better time to introduce Ninja Rick and his SWORD THAT THIRSTS FOR THE BLOOD OF THE GUILTY!

  25. lightsabermario

    Alright, listen up, people. Our fugitive has been on the run for ninety minutes. Average foot speed over uneven ground barring injuries is 4 miles-per-hour. That gives us a radius of six miles. What I want from each and every one of you is a hard-target search of every gas station, residence, warehouse, farmhouse, henhouse, outhouse and doghouse in that area. Checkpoints go up at fifteen miles. Your fugitive’s name is Ryan. Go get him.

    1. Throg

      Win.

    2. Joebo

      A) he IS injured so he should be slower
      B) we’re looking for a dumbass college kid, not a presidential assassin.
      C) all that asside, nice breakdown.

    3. Asuka L.S.

      SIR, YES SIR! *salutes, then promptly departs*

    4. narmenduke

      Can we use the dogs? Pleezpleezpleez can we use the dogs?

      And wonderful Fugitive reference. I salute you, sir.

      1. Skydron

        Yes. Yes you may. RELEASE THE HOUNDS!

  26. katzgoboom

    This strip kinda got to me. I mean, this whole arc is one big WHAM episode, but this one especially…just the way Dorothy looked.

    I could imagine vividly her voice in that scenario and it kind of broke my heart.

  27. Wackd

    If this was MST3K, Joyce’s line in that last panel would probably be met with cheers along with someone dialing 911 immediately.

    Come to think of it, it’s weird to me that I’m the first one to make that joke, or even suggest Joyce should leave. Aren’t we supposed to find this version horribly irritating? That was the plan, right? Or does the mere act of nearly being raped make her more sympathetic?

    (PLAYING DEVIL’S ADVOCATE DON’T ACTUALLY FEEL THIS WAY NO PUNCH NO PUNCH)

    1. Joebo

      Yeah here’s the thing, I am imune to the “no punch” mantra. Sooooo…
      >>Punch<<

      P.S. I don't really care, I just wanted to punch you.

    2. begbert2

      Um, yeah, while some of her uber-religious comments can be irritating, she’s not that irritating. Even to me, and I’m probably the person who’s complained the most about her religiosity.

    3. Chrisby

      Considering that she’s now surpassed Mike in the most popular character poll by a wide margin, I’m gonna say that most people don’t find her irritating.

      She’s naive and sheltered, yes, but I think that makes her an interesting character. Lots of potential for character growth there.

      Plus seeing as how she’s pretty much the “main” character of this particular strip, I don’t think she’s getting bussed home any time soon.

  28. Kisai

    Let’s take one other angle. There are religious groups that don’t believe in hospitals, surgery, drugs, etc. Joyce could be part of one of those and violating their beliefs means they don’t go to heaven or whatever. Far-fetched I know.

    But on the other hand, Joyce apparently has a violent streak, and maybe this isn’t the first time she’s harmed someone. So maybe the “They will take me home and I will never come back” is referencing the previous time it or something like it happened. Maybe the happy fundie persona is just trying to get away from the past.

    As for mr.date-rape, their ought to be a trail of blood and writhing in pain by now.

    1. Joraiem

      Joyce really doesn’t have a violent streak. She punched Joe undeservedly, sure, but that was Mike-induced and a punchline. Mike must create violence or jackassery wherever he is.

      As for glassing Ryan, it was entirely deserved and necessary. If she had waited another second, he would have had her in the bathroom before Sarah got there. She needed to protect herself.

      I think it’s a little far-fetched to assume from those two events that she has a “violent streak.”

    2. Brendan

      Her parents are sending her to what they see as Satan’s lair; you can bet they’ve burnt the word “rape” into her head with a soldering iron. And fundies tend to be pretty casual about violence – part and parcel of celebrating an apocalyptic future war where most of humanity is damned to Hell forever.

      1. Mickeyten

        Are you speaking from plenty o’ personal experience with fundies, here, or just generalizing from the “violent scriptures must mean violent behavior” train of logic?

        Just wondering.

  29. Throg

    It seemed to me that Dorothy was being clear-headed about ALL the repercussions: that Joyce needs to get a blood / urine sample and the drug documented, that Joyce, when her head gets cleared up, may be quite traumatized about the way Ryan revealed his true nature and got scary violent, even for a second, about the possible sh-tstorm of accusations that may fly from Ryan (she was a tease, slut, etc.) the potential for assault charges that may get filed against Joyce and Sarah, etc.

    It’s NOT that simple.

    1. Dr.Z

      Indeed. She will want these things to at least get a restraining order on the bastard if he doesn’t wind up going to jail.

      She is probably not his first ‘mark.’

      The sooner a record starts for Ryan, the sooner the cops can work on connecting the dots and getting him off the streets.

  30. ryan

    amazi-girl pressed the L2 button to enter detective mode and analyzed the blood on joyce. now she will travel the rooftops of bloomington, hot on the trail of the superstitious and cowardly villain.

    1. begbert2

      If she analyzes the blood on Joyce, she’d end up arresting Joyce. pretty much all of the red on her is her own.

      ‘T’s what happens when you break a glass in your own hand.

  31. SolegitRR

    As much as I like to see Joyce being tough, I’m a little distraught that she’s not going through the whole routine with this. She needs to get to a hospital pronto; there’s no telling exactly WHAT was in that drink. And this dude needs to be put on the record now, before he hurts someone else or tries to get his vengeance on Joyce or Sarah. The fact that she’s going to the hospital doesn’t necessarily mean her parents have to know. Or does it, I can’t remember how old she is here…

    1. evee

      Well since she’s probably under her parents insurance it doesn’t really matter how old she is. They’ll get a bill. I was 18 when i split my head open falling like an idiot up at college ( i wasn’t drinking just clumsy, not that anyone believed me) and my parents got the bill because I was on my mom’s insurance. Four years later and they still don’t believe me that I wasn’t drinking : |

      1. Dr.Z

        The local colleges where I live all have required insurance policies that are now a part of the school bill. You have to go out of your way to drop them, and they are damn affordable to the point that it is pointless to do so and most people don’t.

        I get the impression they started doing it for reasons like what we see in today’s comic.

        1. evee

          My school offered one but I opted out because as a dependent on my mom’s insurance I wasn’t paying anything. I only knew two people on the school plan.
          That’s probably a good idea though, as long as it’s cheap and good ( for example we briefly had crap insurance that barely covered anything and charged me 700 dollars to go inside of the hospital then extra to actually get treatment )

  32. Allie

    It’s illegal for a hospital to contact her parents (I assume since she’s in college that she’s at least 18) without her agreement and illegal for the police to reveal the name of a potential rape victim. Her excuse is bogus and they need to take her to the hospital regardless of her wishes… if she passes out, she does not need to give permission to be treated. So… stand back and let her pass out.

    1. evee

      I pretty sure that with drugs in her system she can be deemed currently incompetent to make decisions.

    2. Terah

      She might not be aware of that. She’s out on her own for the first time in her life, so the fear that her parents will find out and take her new freedom away is a very real fear for her. If they explain to her that her parents won’t know unless she asks the hospital to call them, she might be more willing to go.

      1. Wix

        Well, it’s like Evee said, if she’s deemed not of sound mind, they have to call her next of kin since she couldn’t make sound judgement calls on her own.

        1. Caramellos

          I believe there’s different protocols for different situaitons. Generally doctors will respect a request for privacy, particularly in cases of violence or attempted rape as the assailant may be a part of the victim’s family. If she is in clear mortal danger it will be their obligation to contact next of kin, but in this situation, particularly a hospital near a university, what they’d likely do is see her in E.R., let her sleep off the drugs, probably give her a pamphlet on remaining safe in house party situations, urge her to contact the police, and release her.

          What was said above about health insurance is true, though – she’s most likely on her parents’ plan so they’d receive the bill anyway. She would have to come up with an excuse and I doubt Joyce is very good at lying to her parents.

        2. evee

          nonono sorry I was unclear.

          I meant that she can be treated when brought in by friends if she’s not competent.

          Since it would be temporary they still wouldn’t call anyone unless her life was in danger. Even then they sometimes don’t, my friend was in a coma for four days before the stupid hospital decided oh hey maybe we should contact his family.

  33. OmegaDez

    Does Amazi-Girl see anything without her glasses?

    1. begbert2

      Um, Dina doesn’t have glasses.

  34. T Campbell

    This is thorny. We are now trying to examine the long-term ramifications of a near-rape in a comic strip featuring Amazi-Girl.

    Joyce’s situation is way better than it could be, given that she’s surrounded by concerned people who seem to have no doubt at all that she was the one wronged. Still, there’s a narrow window of concern before most of those people start to feel like they don’t want to get involved.

    Legally punishing campus rape is usually a very difficult process. If Dorothy can make the witnesses agree to testify AS A GROUP, so that they can’t back out once the window of concern passes, then there’s a chance of making something happen in the courts. (I’m afraid there’s a very, very low chance Ryan will rot in prison for this, though, unless he’s somehow intimidated into a full confession.)

    I’m not totally sure what power the press has in this situation. There are obvious restrictions about declaring someone guilty of a crime before it goes to trial, but they might be superseded if the reporter herself is a witness. But that invites a libel suit, and so would a viral campaign to tar his reputation on campus. The latter is less prosecutable but also less effective.

    Amazi-Girl might be the outside-the-box solution needed here, but I dunno. She seems to be quite an athlete (does she Wii?) but not all that good at scaring people. More data needed there.

    Joyce’s desire to cover this up is understandable. She’s reeling from her trauma, maybe partly denying it as many victims do, but also trying not to abandon the test of courage that she faced by coming here tonight. And she might be right about her parents (more data needed). Dorothy the reporter, though, isn’t going to let this one go. The truth must out.

    1. Brendan

      Is it really *that* hard? Between the glass, the witnesses, and the drugs, provided Joyce comes forward, this whole thing reads like a prosecutor’s wet dream to me. It seems like if you couldn’t get a conviction on this, there wouldn’t *be* anyone in jail for rape. I mean, I know the conviction rate is low, but most rapists aren’t dumb enough to *scream* their intents in the middle of a party.

      1. NobodySpecial

        It MIGHT be that hard. Joyce might have at best an unclear idea of what Ryan said to her after the drug does it’s thing, since…well, that’s what the drug DOES. There’s no indication that anyone else heard him or knows exactly what went on, either, for all that everyone jumped to Joyce’s defense. Ryan might successfully claim that he had no idea someone spiked Joyce’s pop and she freaked and hit him with a glass.

        Interesting that Joyce’s first thought is not about shame for herself, but that her parents must not know because she doesn’t want to leave. Even in her drugged state, that’s probably the biggest repudiation of her parent’s teaching than anything else she’s ever done in the strip, parties and hanging out with atheists included.

      2. Caramellos

        This is attempted rape, I’m not sure what the sentence is on obtaining and using drugs in an attempt to subdue and sexually assault someone is, but it will likely not be as long as a rape sentence. It’s nice to think that shouting obscenities and punching a young woman at a party might lead to some serious jail time, but as cases like this go, the guy likely won’t be out of commission for even a year.

        On the other hand, he will almost certainly be expelled from the University, and if his father is a pastor(who has an image to uphold in his community regardless of what he believes about his son’s actions), he will likely be pressed to take a break from school and either enlist in the army/navy or sent elsewhere to shape up his attitude.

        Joyce can have a PPO put on him, and likely one will be placed as the least of results if she attempted to press charges, however PPOs are not indefinite and typically very fallible.

  35. Whit

    Oh, my, she’s off to The Hospital Formerly Known As Bloomington Hospital? Good luck getting good treatment there….

  36. Locke

    SHE IS THE NIGHT.

  37. Bill M.

    I just realized, this is Friday… I’m going to have to wait until Monday to get my next fix… DAMN YOU, WILLIS! This storyline has me hooked.

  38. Ian

    Does that include any moving experiences?

  39. Marksers

    Who else things it’d be cool to see Joe go all Batman and deliver a beatdown while everyone else is still searching for Ryan?

    1. Rex Hondo

      I think it would be cool to see the ending of this story done Clue-style. Multiple endings with various people finding Ryan and stomping him. Heck, I wouldn’t mind seeing characters not even from this comic stomping Ryan.

      1. Karishi

        I think it would be creepy to see the ending of the story done beginning-of-Clue style: Ryan turns up dead in the morning, and like twelve people had motives.

        1. Rex Hondo

          Woo hoo! Murder on the Orient Express, but with college kids!

          -Spoiler Alert-

          He actually dies of anaphylactic shock due to a severe reaction to the drug residue on the glass. Much like Laertes, his own poison proves to be his undoing.

  40. saturnwonder

    Poor Joyce 🙁

  41. Crumplepunch

    I have a horrible feeling that Dorothy means to report this in her newspaper.

    1. Caramellos

      Possibly, though hopefully she’d observe some anonymity and focus less on joyce being a victim than ryan being a creepy rapist douche.

  42. Mickeyten

    I find it kind of mind-boggling the sorts of rationalizations that people in the comments here are drawing from Joyce’s fundie status.

    “Well, she’s a fundie, so she probably hates modern medicine and refuses hospitals.”

    “Well, she’s a fundie, so she always unthinkingly obeys her parents in every whim.”

    “Well, she’s a fundie, so she probably doesn’t understand the implications of this attack.”

    “Well, she’s a fundie, so she must be used to casual violence.”

    “Well, she’s a fundie, so it’s her own fault for idiotically being friendly to and careless around some jerk who pretended to have similar background and interests to her own.”

    1. Henry

      I know; not sure about other people’s experiences with Fundamentalist Christians, but I haven’t seen any that weren’t perfectly functional human beings. Or at least I haven’t seen any fewer than in the general population.

      1. Rex Hondo

        I don’t know about anybody else, but I like to think, at least, that I’m basing my assumptions about Joyce’s motivations on her words and actions. I take her at her word when she says that her parents will take her away. She is flat out saying that if they tell her to come home, she will not resist. I haven’t seen any indication that she’s anti-medicine, or that she doesn’t understand what happened to her.

        Punchline or not, she has shown a willingness to resort to violence for little reason and justify it later as her (and Mike’s) fists being “instruments of the Lord.”

        1. Henry

          I see your point. I was more referring to the people who had somehow come to the conclusion that Joyce wouldn’t want to go to a hospital for religious reasons, rather than the more ‘logical’ reason of not wanting her parents to find out.

          In all fairness to her, I think Joyce would argue it with her parents; that said, they’re probably the ones footing the bill for her education, so she probably wouldn’t have much choice but to listen to them if they insisted that she come home.

          As for the violence, yes, she does seem a bit quick to violence. But we must not forget Mike’s hand in the aforementioned incident; he figured out exactly how to set Joyce off, and took advantage of it. Not that the thing that set her off wasn’t exactly normal, but she was subject to some level of guiding/manipulation by a guy who makes it his job to make others’ lives unpleasant. And with this incident, I think we’ve established that she didn’t have long to act once she realized she was drugged.

  43. Izzy

    Was that Charlie Brown in the background?
    I’m enjoying this arc very much…keep the awesomeness comin, Mr. Willis!

    1. Henry

      Where are you seeing Charlie Brown?

  44. Animaniac

    This sequence of events has changed my perception of Amazi-Girl a bit. In the beginning when she was being super sneaky, people were wondering about any power (like superdense bones) and we know this is a more reality based series, but its Willis, right? It’ could happen. But seeing her standing mid party in her costume, using a bit of superhero dialogue it suddenly hit me. She is one of the ‘new’ breed of real life superheroes, those dedicated (some would say crazy) people who actually put on masks and attempt to do vigilante civil service. So no powers at all, just apparently some fight training and a desire to make the world a better place.

    And for some reason, I’m really liking that.

    1. Joraiem

      Oh god, does that mean her and Mike are the same kind of hero?

      (Not Mike from this comic, S*P Mike.)

  45. Sporkaganza

    It’s been talked about in here that Joyce could die if she doesn’t get to the hospital, so of course my mind jumped to this:

    “If you don’t mind, I’m going to bed before either of you come with another clever idea to get us killed… or worse, expelled!”

    “She needs to sort out her priorities.”

  46. Sir Robin

    I predict we find Ryan battered with Mike standing over him

    Amazi-Girl: Mike, you beat up the rapist!!!

    Mike: He was a rapist?

  47. Thores

    Wow, over 200 comments and not a single prediction that Danny cuts himself shaving and Amazi-Girl thinks he’s a rapist.

  48. ThatGug

    “Broken ribs”

    <.<

    You go girl.

  49. BrokenEye, True False Prophet

    ““My bed will comfort me, my couch will ease my complaint,””

    Job 7:13 (how the hell have I gotten this far into the storyline without having to look up new Bible verses?)

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