170

Surprisingly
Posted on July 15, 2018 by David M Willis

170 thoughts on “Surprisingly”

  1. Doctor_Who

    Amazi-Girl may be immune to criticism, but Amber has a far greater immunity: kink-shaming!

    1. Commodore Counterintuitive

      What if kink-shaming IS my kink?

      1. butts

        shame on you

        1. butts

          that’s right you’re getting kinkshamed by butts

          take a look at yourself in the mirror, mate

        2. Yumi

          What if being kink-shamed is my kink

        3. butts

          that’s valid and i appreciate you for it

        4. Yumi

          Despite how far removed from seriousness this is, I still am somehow comforted by your response. Part of my brain is going, “No, but the joke is–” and part’s just like, “I’m valid :)”

        5. Demi

          This is so cute and good

        6. butts

          d(‿|‿)b

        7. kendermouse

          Of course you’re valid. <3

        8. TachyonCode

          Validated by butts: the best self-esteem booster.

        9. Deanatay

          Waitaminute, is this like, a ‘good/bad side of the same coin’ kind of thing? Like, when you tell someone you’re a masochist, they’re OK with it, but if you’re a sadist, people throw rocks at you?

          I mean… I was just curious…

        10. Hana

          Clearly the masochists need to say they’re sadists too.

        11. Yumi

          I think it’s more about giving the opposite response of what I “want” in this case.

        12. das-g

          @Yumi that reminds me of an old joke:

          S/M session

          M to S: Hit me!
          S: No!
          M: Thanks!

          (No offense to people in the lifestyle intended.)

        13. Jason

          I was told that joke in math class. By the teacher.
          To a class of 14-15 year olds.

          She seemed very disappointed to have to explain the joke.

        14. Minotaur

          Weird, I was told that joke at a younger age than that and I got it without explanation.

      2. vlademir1

        Kink-shaming is a perfectly valid kink, provided both you and the person(s) you are kink-shaming are adults and have consented to that. If neither of those caveats are true however, I refer you to butts above posts.

        Also, I’m pretty sure I have met at least one person for whom kink-shaming was part of their CNC dynamic with their partner. If you don’t know what CNC is, look it up as I’m not explaining that on here for very bloody obvious reasons like not wanting to make a lot of people uncomfortable 😀

        1. butts

          okay so i know what you meant by CNC but you know I go straight to CNC routers

          gonna kinkshame me up a new desk chair

        2. marianne

          Mine goes to the command centres of Battlestar Galactica (remake). I’m going to assume their kink was cosplaying as officers, getting drunk, complaining about frakking toasters, then frakking each other all over the various command consoles, by the romantic light and soothing sounds of a DRADIS. Definitely a kink worthy of respect.

        3. Khyrin

          Too late. CNC squicks me. Mainly because I had a partner who thought I was just playing when I said ‘STOP’ when I felt something tear in my shoulder.

      3. Felian

        Well, then it becomes your Kryptonite.

  2. AnvilPro

    Walky and Amber are so perfect for each other

    1. SeanR

      Right up until Walky’s sister shows up on the grooms side, and Amber goes on a mayhem spree.
      The officiating clergy, in an interview with the local news agencies, could only utter the same three words, over, and over.
      “So much blood”.

      1. Passchendaele

        the real red wedding

        1. cbwroses

          As long as the Freys die this time, it’s cool.

        2. ObiKemnebi

          They did. All at once. At a different family gathering. It was incredibly satisfying 🙂

        3. John

          Honestly, the only thing I’m watching GoT for now is Arya murdering dudes.

        4. Meamoi

          Tyrion for me. Dude is the main character of the show, imho.

        5. HeySo

          Tyrion has been pretty well established as at least seeming to be one of three core characters of the series [spoilers] along with Jon and Daenerys, so him being emphasized isn’t surprising.
          ..that said, there’s no doubt that Peter Dinklage is amazing, and helps carry the show (which is saying a lot, considering the extensively great selection of actors within the show).

          Even so, he’s a more shallow character than he is in the books (though again: Peter Dinklage > that other stuff), like most of the characters in the show (in large part ’cause the books are heavily based in character introspection). A notable exception is The Hound, who was always more of a minor side-character in the books, but really became richer in the TV show.

    2. cbwroses

      I really hope they get together.

  3. Ana Chronistic

    @its_walky: best elbows

    You can no longer send Direct Messages to this person. Learn more

    1. butts

      kinkshaming you too, Ana

  4. butts

    Walky knows a good ween when he sees it

    (haha so does Joyce)

    1. Unusually Angry Hippie

      Walky is in the category of ‘bisexual the second someone shows interest’. He’s too lazy to go find a dude to bang but wouldn’t say no if offered the opportunity.

      1. thejeff

        That’s more Ethan. (Well, except for being gay, not bi. Still, too lazy to find a dude to bang)

        Walky’s joked about it and showed couple of actual hints. Possible, but not conclusive. We’ll have to wait until someone shows interest. 🙂

        1. Schol-R-LEA

          There was also the time he offered Jason a blowjob in exchange for better grades, but I am pretty sure that doesn’t say much either way WRT orientation, even if it was serious. More of a G4P situation, so to speak.

          OTOH, David making Walky buttsecks canon in DoA would be wonderful to see. Just as long as it isn’t the surprise type of buttsecks.

  5. BBCC

    I’m proud of you, Amber.

    1. Inahc

      yes.

    2. ShinyNeen

      Yeah! Own who you are, Amber!

  6. Inahc

    rofl… “weenus” … that just… lol

  7. Nono

    I’m assuming it’s Stucky.

  8. Passchendaele

    who can shame a high-quality weenus

    1. cbwroses

      In Soviet Russia, high-quality weenus shames you…

      1. Passchendaele

        soviet weenus, I’m trying my hardest, don’t judge me. ;-;

  9. Kathleen

    I love how sex and body positive Walky is. He has a lot of weird hang ups about himself but he is totally chill with everyone else doing whatever they want.

  10. Mada

    Ah, he’s found the Hulk buttfucking Widow in the pussy.

    1. Inahc

      … isn’t that a contradiction in terms?

      1. Yumi

        Not if you’re the Hulk.

      2. Reltzik

        Canon has Widow being “enhanced” in the Red Room facility. Obviously this slash-art is exploring the fan theory that the enhancements included a cloaca.

        1. TachyonCode

          I didn’t think I’d actually find an acceptable explanation for this semantic confusion, but you managed to meet me halfway. Well done.

        2. Rowen Morland

          You met halfway in the cloaca?

    2. Yumi

      I my gut says that neither of those characters are involved in this picture.

      1. Doctor_Who

        I mean, Hulk might be, but it’s Amber so I guarantee the other party is a dude.

        1. Yumi

          Yeah, I just don’t see him as being one of the characters in it. Maybe I could see it being Hulk/Thor, but I just feel like he’s a less likely contender.

        2. BBCC

          Could also be Bruce/Tony. Those two used to be semi popular.

        3. Yumi

          I could see Bruce/Tony. I separate Bruce from Hulk, though.

        4. Nono

          Nobody cares about Hawkeye…

        5. BBCC

          So, big question – does Amber ship Clintasha, Stevetasha, or Buckynat?

          Or, far less likely, Brucetasha?

        6. Yumi

          I see her shipping Clintasha just because it’s less disruptive to her other ships. Or she just doesn’t care.

        7. BBCC

          Plus, I mean, they were also pretty popular after Avengers.

        8. butts

          Pretty sure Stevetasha and Buckytasha are out, for pretty much the exact same reason (each other)

        9. Yumi

          Oh, yeah, I shipped Clintasha after Avengers. Then I got to not caring.

        10. BBCC

          Hey, she might be a member of multi shipping hell. (Actually I’m pretty sure she ships Steve with both Bucky and Tony so…yeah, multi shipping hell).

        11. Meamoi

          Actually, I expect Amber to use Hulk for self-insertion.

        12. Kinoko

          I really see no contradiction with Steve/Bucky and Steve/Tony. The entire subtext of Civil War reads like Tony being upset Steve has left him for Bucky once he realized Bucky was actually alive and caught up with him.

          …Though shipping it this way is somewhat undercut by the real reason for Tony’s grief. :C

    3. cbwroses

      I’m confused. Is that another name for doggie style or is this a position I’ve never heard of and/or put a name to?

      1. Yumi

        Buttfucking is exactly what it sounds like.

        1. cbwroses

          Yes, which would prevent it from being in the vagina. Hence my confusion.

        2. Yumi

          p sure that’s the joke

        3. cbwroses

          If you say so.
          I’d much prefer it to be a position or name for a position that I haven’t heard of so I could learn something new.

        4. Yumi

          It’s already a thing as is, though. Like, it’s already a way to refer to type of sex. If your confusion is what it meant, then you could consider that as learning something new. If you already knew what it was, then the way you expressed your confusion was confusing.

        5. cbwroses

          Except it’s not a type of sex if it’s a joke (I guess that the hulk thrust so hard he entered her vagina from her ass).

          It’s only a type of sex if it’s not a joke, in which case I’d like to know which sexual position it’s referring to (without trying to make this a sex thread, I first thought it was a description for a position I like but has no name that I personally know of).

          And since you’re the one telling me what it means instead of the original poster, I can’t tell if what you’re telling me is correct or only what you think it means. So that doesn’t lessen my confusion.
          I guess I just don’t have the right sense of humor to get it.

        6. Yumi

          If you’re taking “buttfuck in the pussy” as the whole thing, then yes, I see that as a “joke.” I was referring just to “buttfucking.”

        7. cbwroses

          There’s no way for you to know, but I’ve been aware of anal sex for a long time, so that part wasn’t new to me.

        8. Inahc

          I can’t help thinking of it less as a joke and more as an irreversible medical issue.

        9. Yumi

          I mean, I don’t find it particularly funny and it does make me wince, so I’m kinda there with you.

      2. Deadjolras

        Guys, it’s a meme.

        1. Deadjolras

          http://i.imgur.com/oOBPFys.jpg

        2. cbwroses

          Huh. I guess life imitates art (do memes count as art?).
          Also, thank you for the clarification.

        3. Zach

          Memes are where life and art overlap.
          Help! my art is spreading, stop it!

    4. butts

      hey, i’m flattered, but i’m already in a committed relationship

      …and don’t call me a pussy

    5. maxyai

      Hulk x anybody = very painful death

      1. badumtiss

        She-Hulk would like to have a word with you.

        1. Deanatay

          Um, she’s a blood relative, so unless you’re That Kind Of Shipper, no.

      2. thejeff

        Man of Steel, Woman of Kleenex

        1. Meamoi

          That was… oddly educational.

  11. adjudicus

    Please tell me Willis is going to post this on Amber’s twitter

    1. Phil

      He did, but he didn’t RT anything :'(

      1. Tan

        Checked this also. My disappointment is boundless.

  12. Stephen Bierce

    You’re So Vein
    You probably think this porn is about you    …

    1. butts

      ouch the pun

      1. Stephen Bierce

        I got it from Dynamite magazine, about as old as the song itself.

    2. Wizard

      Please consider yourself upvoted.

  13. Randrius

    Am I the only one wondering which characters weenus he speaks of?

    1. shadowcell

      it’s Thor’s mighty Mjolnir

      also there’s a hammer

      1. Keulen

        “The hammer is my penis.”

        1. butts

          a shame about that Hela then

          (the Thor movies are way funnier if you replace the word “hammer” with “penis”)

        2. Yumi

          So’s the hardware store.

        3. StClair

          https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DFI6cV9slfI

        4. Reltzik

          …. you mean the part where he tried to thwap her in the face with his might, erm, hammer, and she grabbed his harder-than-steel-… erm, hammer, and crushed it with one hand, and he wandered around listless and broken for most of the rest of the movie whining about his lost, erm, hammer?

        5. TachyonCode

          Talk to me, about a ball-peen hammer.

      2. Commodore Counterintuitive

        “You want me to put the hammer down?”

    2. Yumi

      My guess is that the picture is Steve/Bucky or Steve/Tony. So I guess I’ll go with it being Captain America’s weenus and also that it’s red, white, and blue.

      1. Tacos

        He might want to go see a doctor if it’s those colors…

        1. Yumi

          You know those firecracker popsicles?
          That’s what they were based on.

        2. badumtiss

          Captain America’s weenus?

        3. Deanatay

          The Man With The Patriotic Elbows

    3. Proxiehunter

      Rule 63 Black Widow.

  14. Marsh Maryrose

    And now we know the real name of the pornlord’s sex tape.

  15. newllend(henryvolt)

    Walky seems to have a code of living life shamelessly, only makes sense he respects those who are also embrace that code.

  16. TooOldToBeCool

    It would be fun to see these tweets on the official Twitter accounts of the characters.

  17. Scoops

    Next book title: Wait, are these Avengers “doing it”?

    1. Marsh Maryrose

      Not “This Weenus is Extremely Well-Rendered”?

      Although I guess that’s more the name of a Slipshine. Which had better not take place in a tallow factory.

      1. Dark_T_Zeratul

        I am laughing way too hard at this.

  18. Keulen

    I’m trying so hard not to ship Walky and Amber, but they’re making it difficult.

    1. Sporky

      The ship name shall be Wamber because it sounds funny

      1. cbwroses

        I thought it was agreed that it was S.S. Garbage Skowl.

      2. King Daniel

        I believe it has already been christened the SS Garbage Skowl.

        Unless it’s diesel-powered, then it would more properly be the MV Garbage Skowl.

        1. Reltzik

          I think it runs on garbage biomass.

        2. King Daniel

          I suppose the big question is, does that run a steam engine, a turbine, or an internal combustion engine? 😛

          (I used to be a huge nerd about these things when I was younger if you can’t tell xD)

        3. Reltzik

          If it’s a ship, it’s supposed to be steamy.

      3. mrnoidea

        Hell of a lot better than Aalky.

  19. ARTSCHOOLRAGE

    ….. yeah i ship walky x amber. Amber could benefit from someone with no expectations of her. Amazigirl would probably have issue with walky tho.

    1. thejeff

      Honestly, I don’t want to ship Amber with anyone until she gets at least some of her issues sorted out. At the very least, she’d need to be completely up front with Walky about what he’s getting himself into – more so than she’s been with so far with anyone. Walky doesn’t need a retread of Danny’s slow realization that there’s something more than a secret identity going on here.

      1. thejeff

        From the other angle, Walky’s nowhere near over Dorothy enough to be getting involved with anyone else.

      2. Schpoonman

        Well, he does already know she’s Amazigirl.

        1. thejeff

          He knows the secret identity, but nothing about the disassociation.
          No idea that Amazi-Girl’s running around doing stuff while Amber sleeps that Amber doesn’t remember.

      3. Artschoolrage

        Oh, definitely. In an ideal world, Amber would recieve intense, personal therapy to figure out the amazigirl/amber problem and eventually be just amber and also her dad would be in jail and faz would attend college with her and then be best siblings.

        However, this will not be the case, so walkys almost aggressive non chalance will be endearing in some capacity. I predict amazigirl will make it known she does not approve, and walkys tactlessness will rear up at some point to erase the line btween amazigirl and amber, causing chaos.

  20. Tacos

    I didn’t know Amber could draw such great elbows.

    1. Yumi

      I don’t think she drew the elbow. Just saw it and RTed that detailed joint.

  21. DailyBrad

    What Avenger does Walky have to blow for some free pizza?

  22. HeatherJean

    Hmmmph! “Well-rendered” indeed. This from someone who claims to have seen his first uncircumcised weenus just a few weeks back?

    1. Tacos

      The weenus is the term for the skin of your elbow.

      1. Reltzik

        And Walky can make his elbow skin point at itself.

  23. Johan

    Sorry but I don’t ship this. I’ll friendship it.

    1. darkgloomie

      Friendship is bestship

  24. Aegon01

    Uh, does Walky know that Weenus is not Penis?

    1. Reltzik

      With Walky, it’s best to assume Shroedinger’s Knowledge.

  25. RogueParasol

    I…almost ship it? Like, this interaction is adorable and shows potential, but overall I’m not sure it would be a good idea for either of them and support the idea of a weird friendship instead.

  26. kayelem

    Is anyone worried about Amber getting accused of chasing Dorothy’s ‘sloppy seconds’ so to speak? If she and Walky get together, she will have dated both of Dorothy’s break ups and I don’t know how congenial the shared bathroom situation is going to get. I think Dorothy will take Amber dating Walky a lot harder than she did the Danny situation because she seems to be taking the break up a lot harder and obviously still cares deeply for Walky.

    1. kayelem

      For the record, I don’t think that is the case. I think Amber is pursuing her attractions and they just so happen to be Dorothy’s exes. But there is definitely a lot of potential for conflict there. And they look very similar as Joe pointed out when Danny started dating her, which made it a little weird on Danny’s part. Walky is surprising and has a shown his morals here and there. I wonder if, because he is still in love with Dorothy, he won’t date Amber/will turn her down?

      1. butts

        I don’t see them getting together. Mutual self-loathing isn’t much of a basis for a who the fuck am i kidding that’s Ruth and Billie’s whole deal

    2. Reltzik

      Or is it that Walky is pursuing Danny’s exes?

    3. badumtiss

      …people aren’t “sloppy seconds” just because they’ve dated someone else. What a weird sex-negative thing to say. Amber and Dorothy are barely peripherally friends, and if they both liked Danny then they clearly share a “type” or several traits they’re interested in.

      It isn’t weird if Amber does like Walky, and Dorothy doesn’t forever have dibs on men she’s dated in the past.

      1. Schpoonman

        Yeah, it’s a bullshit concept, but it exists.

      2. thejeff

        It would be a little weird if the pattern continues. I don’t think 2 examples would rise to that level though.

      3. kayelem

        I agree with Schpoonman that it is a bullshit concept and didn’t mean to use it in a way that implied I think that is what is going on–just that there might be drama of that tone if Amber pursues Walky romantically. (See my ‘for the record’ comment I made after I realized it could be read that way.) Dorothy and Amber share a trama, a bathroom, and an ex. There was definitely some conflict when Amber dated Danny–remember that strip when Dina escapes the awkward into the shared bathroom: http://www.dumbingofage.com/2015/comic/book-5/04-walking-with-dina/goofoff/
        Dorothy shrugged that off real well because she very clearly did not have feeling for Danny anymore. Now she has seen Amber go all stabby-mc-stabby and she has still has strong feelings for Walky. I am just saying that there is the potential for conflict, especially since Amber was quick to talk about Dorothy being exhausting and how their relationship ending must have been a relief: http://www.dumbingofage.com/2018/comic/book-8/03-faz-is-great/rude/

    4. Puckish Rogue

      Just out of curiosity, whats a worse description: sloppy seconds or stirring the porridge?

  27. LovelyMonsters

    I physically shuddered when I read the alt-text.

  28. BenRG

    Panels 4 and 5 today are basically Amber saying: “Yes, my kink is superhero slash pictures and you can’t shame me for it! I… p… please don’t shame me for it!”

    I’ve said this before but Amber desperately needs a friend who can appreciate her for what she is without any reservations.

    1. Inahc

      no, that’s panel 4. panel 5 is amber going “wait, fuck this shit, I don’t care what people think any more!” 🙂

      as for friends… you mean like ethan and walky? (and danny would, but she pushed him away)

  29. Dariu55

    it’s all about that elbow game.

  30. darkoneko

    Wait until you see all her hentai likes randomly popping up in your timeline.

  31. Daisy

    Oh so Jordan not only draws porn but avengers slash, we are learning

    Also what happened to Mike????? because if he drops in on joyce v raidah I’m gonna be upset

  32. David Doty

    “Avengers” is a good start, but there should really be a slashfic tag. For… research purposes?

  33. Makkabee

    They come runnin’ just as fast as they can,
    The girls go crazy ’bout a well-rendered weenus!

    *guitar solo*

  34. Valerie Holt

    There’s a “buttload” joke in here somewhere but I haven’t got it

  35. Bagge

    Honestly, you can’t help respect a well rendered weenus.

  36. Deanatay

    If YOUR elbow skin is swollen, with throbbing veins, see a doctor. Especially if it lasts more than 4 hours.

  37. abysswatcher1993

    Amber should consider making fujoshi art instead of vigilantism. It’s healthier to make homoerotic art than to disassociate from your good side because of self hatred.

    1. King Daniel

      Amber already writes slashfic, when she’s not killing spiders.

    2. thejeff

      Ah yes, the old “stop being mentally ill and draw pictures instead” theory. Does that ever actually work?

      1. Bathymetheus

        It can. It’s a variant of talking therapy. The idea is to get the person to express/communicate their issue in some form. Then the therapist can help them deal with it. Some people find it easier to draw rather than verbalise what is bothering them. Presumably there could also be dance therapy, though I’m not aware that this is actually a thing.

        1. Bathymetheus

          And there is, of course, music therapy. That’s been around for a long time.

        2. thejeff

          That’s a bit different than “Oh, I’m just going to draw dirty pictures and then my problems will go away.”

  38. ǝ snow ʍousɐ

    Amber’s account should definitely be private, whether or not Amber wants Walky to be allowed access…

  39. Puckish Rogue

    This is all well and good but damned if I don’t want to see Joyce v Raidah continue

    1. Clif

      Careful what you ask for.

  40. zoomer296

    THE GIF

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