237

Not Sure
Posted on February 9, 2012 by David M Willis

237 thoughts on “Not Sure”

  1. OhHayMike

    Way to play it smooth, Amber.

    1. Mkvenner

      You don’t have to be smooth with billie she’s too thick.

      1. fellixe

        Smooth? Thick? Are you saying her milk shake brings all the boys to the yard?

        1. Aizat

          Er….yes, her “milk shake”, that’s it.

        2. Bickendan

          I could use a nice, thick yet smooth milk shake right about now.

        3. L

          Damn right, it’s better than yours. She could teach you, but

        4. iSaidCandleja-

          I think she taught Mike, if you know what I mean.

        5. Rowen Morland

          5c Shakes?

        6. Blob Marley

          I gotta see what kind of milkshake costs five cents.

        7. Alechsa

          Your mom’s

        8. Blob Marley

          Walked into that one, I guess.

    2. Plasma Mongoose

      Smooth as gravel.

      1. fellixe

        Thick as a brick.

        1. Mkvenner

          Thick as King George IV.

        2. Kernanator

          Thick as a dick.

          ….Wait.

        3. Mkvenner

          wrong direction.

        4. Aizat

          Thick as butter cream?

        5. Kernanator

          Thick as a big ass?

          Goddammit, why can’t I keep my comments out of the gutter?

        6. Plasma Mongoose

          Cos you’re too drunk to crawl out? 😛

        7. Kernanator

          Wait, you’re saying my mind brought alcohol?

          And it didn’t tell ME?!

          That bastard.

        8. Michelle J Caboose

          It couldn’t tell you. It was passed out, drunk, in that gutter, and you stepped over it without looking, because you thought it was just another wino.

          Meh, that sounded funnier in my head.

      2. Mkvenner

        More like shrapnel.

        1. Mkvenner

          There’s alot of asbestos in the shrapnel.

      3. Kernanator

        Smooth as a porcupine.

        1. Plasma Mongoose

          Smooth as 2 hour old whiskey.

        2. Mkvenner

          Smooth a foreshot.

        3. Kernanator

          Smooth as The Thing.

          Sharp as a club.

        4. Aizat

          Smooth as a baby’s bottom.

        5. Plasma Mongoose

          As a rule, babies’ bottoms are smooth.

        6. begbert2

          Maybe it was double sarcasm?

  2. Jen Aside

    Wow, what is THAT face, Amber?

    1. Kernanator

      That’s her “What is that smell” face. 😛

      1. Marc

        What the Rock is cookin’. Danny bought the Rock’s cookbook. And it smells.

    2. ryan

      she got a look at billie’s posterior.

      1. SCharb

        bottom lip bite = DAT ASS

        1. Michelle J Caboose

          No, Amber! She belongs to your roomie!

  3. Mkvenner

    Poor Amber. 🙁

  4. Ridureyu

    Man, Amber is SO jealous of Amazi-Girl.

    1. Dave H

      I happened to click on the cast list today. Some things are more obvious now.

      1. Jen Aside

        That Becky’s Amazi-Girl??

        XD

  5. Plasma Mongoose

    I’m not certain that Billie’s definition of Journalism matches anyone elses.

    1. Kernanator

      Well, maybe Hugh Heffner’s.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        I thought that the articles only exist in Playboy to allow readers an excuse to ‘read’ it.

        1. awa64

          The articles and stories in Playboy actually are–or at least were, at one point, I can’t speak for the magazine’s current quality–relatively interesting. I can’t imagine anyone bought it *just* for the articles, but they certainly weren’t just padding around the pictures of neikkid ladies, considering that writers like Joseph Heller, Roald Dahl, Ian Fleming, Ray Bradbury, Jack Kerouac, Kurt Vonnegut, Chuck Palahniuk, Arthur C Clarke, and Michael Crichton have all contributed to the magazine.

        2. Historyman68

          Don’t forget Shel Silverstein and Hunter S Thompson!

        3. Shippy McShipper

          Back in the day, Playboy would actually pay a higher price to its writters than most other magazines, presumably to help smooth out the fact that they would be writting to Playboy. As a result, it ended up having better writters and better stories than most contemporary magazines.
          I honestly doubt that they still can do that, though, what with the advent of the World Porn Web and whatnot.

        4. John Harmon

          Not only that, but back in the day during the big comic book scare, Playboy was hiring comic book artists to draw for the magazine at a time when they couldn’t get much work anywhere else. Hugh Heffner has always been a big comic book fan.

        5. Akilika

          Frankly, the last Playboy I bought had far more interesting articles than pictures. (And far more articles than pictures, at that.) The one about the economy remains one of the better ones on the subject I’ve read–unfortunately, I haven’t been able to find it again, nor do I really remember what month the issue was…

          (October ’08, maybe? November? Something around there…)

        6. Fraser

          OMG still photos of naked women that I can go and pay for in public! Can’t beat that! Nuts to those youtube but pornographic websites.

    2. David Herbert

      Well she seems to have enjoyed her version of events.

    3. Peruhain

      Interesting notion of journalistic ethics . . .

    4. Kirt Dankmyer

      Sounds like a good new euphemism to me. 🙂

    5. mechaqua

      I think Billie a legitimate journalist she did do quite a spread on Danny.

  6. dchorror

    For Journalism. Wouldn’t mind that.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      She knows all about in depth reporting.

      1. Aizat

        Yep, she knows how to go deeper.

        1. Kernanator

          Danception

        2. Rex Hondo

          Probing interviews.

        3. |Agent

          Really nailing that story.

        4. Kavonde

          Too bad Amber didn’t get there sooner; Billie could have gotten a byline.

        5. Plasma Mongoose

          Not to mention extra column inches if Joe showed up.

        6. Tucker

          For unrelenting analysis.

        7. Plasma Mongoose

          It’s almost a shame that Willis won’t show us her ‘full page spread’. 😀

        8. Bill M.

          Billie’s showing her dedication to getting the story, she would bend over backwards, she was willing to go all the way, and not let go of an undercover informant until he gave up the goods.

      2. Rex Hondo

        She knows she really has to be on top of things to get the scoop!

        1. Peruhain

          Well if Deep Throat blew the lid on Watergate . . .

    2. StClair

      The Fourth Estate /and/ the Second Oldest Profession.

  7. Spiffster13

    Journalism… Is that what they are calling it these days?

    Kids today…

  8. Mkvenner

    Journalism? Is that what they’re calling it these days?

    We could hear you across town.

  9. Tricia

    Why do I get the feeling that “for journalism” is going to become another meme around here?

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Well, we know that Danny found out the hard way that she is a ‘press agent’. 😀

      1. Aizat

        Haha, double entendre.

        1. Plasma Mongoose

          Double entendre are the bread and butter of traditional humour.

        2. CWR

          “For journalism! For justice!!”

        3. lordphulish

          For science!

        4. Michelle J Caboose

          She blinded me! With science!

    2. calendarman27

      your mom was a meme, in her faaaaace! for a nickel. with her penis. etc. etc.

      1. Rex Hondo

        I wild meme has appeared!

        1. MeHael

          Wild meme uses repetition! It’s super effective!

      2. Jackson

        No love for the femurs?

    3. PedanticJerkass

      I… I think you might be right. *weary sigh*

  10. BugBerry

    I hope Danny’s bed has enough “Journalistic Integrity”.

    1. Mkvenner

      Why does that make me think of 1000 Ways To Die.

      1. OhHayMike

        That is a very good question.

    2. George

      That was Joyce and Walky’s gag, so I’m sure the bed is fine.

      1. aydr

        Joyce and Walky’s gag? Those two aren’t together in this universe, why do they have a gag o_O

        1. Justin

          …is it a ball gag?

  11. Cholma

    Whoa. I never really realized the height difference between Joe and the ladies before. Billie and Amber look so tiny next to him.

    1. Wonder Wig

      Joe says, “Why thank you.”

      1. Bickendan

        Why, thank you.

    2. Animal

      Inserts in his shoes. Adds half an inch, easy.

      1. aydr

        “shoes”

      2. CWR

        I thought it was shaving your pubes that adds half an inch.

        1. Justin

          Depends on the direction.

    3. Mkvenner

      He’s standing on a soapbox.

    4. Rex Hondo

      Joe is the Jewish Apache Chief.

      1. McGruff the Crime Dog

        MY LAP!

  12. NCP19

    If I didn’t already know that Amazi-Girl is Ultra Car, I’d say methinks the lady doth protest too much.

    1. Drunken Nordmann

      No – obviously Joe is Amazi-Girl. Only a super-hero could be so calm when someone’s mentioning his alter ego in front of him.

  13. jaredstar1

    So thats what they call it now eh billie. well lets hope it was at least a good story

  14. b

    makes me sad

  15. Dave Van Domelen

    The five W’s of journalism: Who, What, Where, When, and WHOA NELLY!

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      I always thought it was Whoopee but what do I know?

      1. Kernanator

        I play The Sims, so I can’t help but think of it as “Woo-Hoo!”

    2. Rex Hondo

      It’s who, what, when, where, and “why not?”

    3. Kalan

      “Whoa Nelly!” is a tribute to famed journalist Nelly Bly. True story.
      (not really)
      http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Nellie_Bly

  16. DagonXIII

    That was short. I bet the church-goers aren’t even off ‘Lord I lift your name on high yet.’

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Nah, I’m sure they’re singing Hallelujah by now.

    2. Rex Hondo

      Well, we don’t know exactly how much time has been passing between strips…

      1. McGruff the Crime Dog

        I say two months.

  17. Wonder Wig

    For Journalism! should replace, For Science!

    1. Maycroft

      For the perpetuation of the human kind as well.

  18. Khantalas

    We missed out on the whole “journalism” part, though. I’m not even sure Billie asked Danny anything about Amazi-Girl.

  19. calendarman27

    you know joe’s just thinking “threesomethreesomethreesomethreesomethreesome”

    1. Aizat

      Hey, how do you read my mind?

  20. Aizat

    Ah yes, “journalism”. Man, this joke is getting old.

    1. Kernanator

      Ah yes, “journalism”. We have dismissed those claims.

      1. Aizat

        What claims?

        1. CWR

          I’ve dismissed those clams, myself.

  21. DagonXIII

    I think the sock changed color again. It was white then grey and now… lilac?

    1. David

      The sock has been 100% white every day it’s appeared. As in, I’ve never even colored it, leaving it the default white. The first day I forgot to color in the gray heel and toe, but otherwise the body of the sock has been the same color.

      You folks are weird.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        True, but thats’s why you love us. 😀

        1. MarcinMN

          I think it just looks different because it had a black outline for the past two days, but today it has a grey outline. (That, and the heel and toe are grey today.) 🙂

        2. lawzlo

          I vote red and green plaid yesterday, yellow and black pinstripes today, and a fishnet pantyhose tomorrow!

        3. Tucker

          Check Joe’s shadow yesterday.

        4. CWR

          At five o’clock.

        5. ryan

          did joe see his own shadow?

      2. Random Webcomics Junkie

        Come on, Willis. You of all people should be aware that fixating on minor details is what fandoms do best!

  22. Kernanator

    Awwwwwkwarrrrd.

    Also, I can honestly say I’ve never heard that one before. And by “that one”, I mean “journalism” as a euphemism for sex.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Why wouldn’t it be, after all, in journalism, you go under the covers and press the flesh.

      1. Kernanator

        Also, sometimes you need to play hardball.

        1. Doom Shepherd

          Not to mention that, as Whoopi Goldberg said, journalists will “f*** up anything you say”.

        2. Rex Hondo

          And when Bill O’Reilly is involved, things get really ugly, really fast.

    2. Aizat

      A lot of things can be used as a euphemism. Like sharpening a pencil for an example.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        That’s the wonderful thing about English, there is sooo many ways you can make it dirty.

        1. Rex Hondo

          One of the reasons I’m so glad it’s my native tongue.

  23. Animal

    “Journalism?”

    Whoa! I just learned a new euphemism!

    1. Aizat

      Trust me, you can make anything into a euphemism.

      1. StClair

        Verbing the noun, baby.

        1. Michelle J Caboose

          So, then that means you can euphemise anything?

    2. Kernanator

      Try to use it in everyday life! Whenever possible!

  24. Aizat

    I’m not sure? Is that another name for acquaintance?

  25. Lord Synick XXIII

    USS DannyxAmber…you will be sorely missed… T.T

  26. Wack'd

    Friend, Amber. The word you are looking for is friend.

    1. Kernanator

      Ffffrrrrrriiieeeeeennnnnd? What does “friend” mean?

      …

      Is it something you eat?

      1. Aizat

        F is for fellow that do stuff together with you.
        R is for….. can someone help me out here?

        1. CWR

          …relationship, which is friendly.
          I is for isotope…hrm.

        2. Aizat

          which serves as an analogy of having a friend?

        3. Rex Hondo

          E is for ERROR, because robots don’t understand friendship.

        4. Aizat

          N is for anywhere and anytime at all.

        5. Anne Onymous

          Right here in the deep blue sea!

          Wait…

        6. fellixe

          And D is for divorce, but we can always just be friends!

        7. Aizat

          Does that answer your question, Kernanator?

        8. Kernanator

          Good enough!

  27. Khrene Cleaver

    I just checked this after seeing the Danny kiss. God fuckin damn Danny just won!

    1. Aizat

      Yep, he just won the jackpot.

  28. Emily

    Looks like they both had a good time…

  29. Thores

    I like how Joe is totally okay with being hit on by someone he just walked in on with his best friend, like, <10 mins ago.

    1. Aizat

      It is Joe we’re talking about here.

    2. begbert2

      Plus she’s less hitting on him than complimenting his physique.

      1. Random Webcomics Junkie

        If it’s not full-on-hitting-on, it’s definitely at least flirting.

  30. NF

    …

    …

    …

    Faaace…

    1. Aizat

      …

      …

      …

      Feeeeemurss……

      1. Kernanator

        …

        …

        …

        With his peeeenissss.

        1. Aizat

          …

          …

          …

          For a niiiiiiiiickelllllllll……

        2. Rex Hondo

          Ha ha, temporal distortion!

        3. Spazman

          …

          …

          …

          for jooournaliiiiiiiism……

        4. Aizat

          …

          …

          …

          for great juuusticeeeee…..

        5. fishsicles

          …
          …
          …
          move ziiiiiiiiiiig

  31. Edd

    Damn, I never noticed that Joe is so tall.

    The definition that Billy gives for journalism reminds me of the first bit from the movie “three kings”

  32. Brendan

    My sock is compression-artifact-colored.

  33. Tandel

    Holy crap, I can’t believe I’d never even thought of a ship situation between Joe and Billie. I think the previous incarnations respective relationships totally threw me off for that being a possibility.

    Any guesses how long it’ll take for them to make like Mike does with your mom?

  34. iSaidCandleja-

    I forgot Billie brought a tape recorder with her. Roz had a webcam with her…

    I smell a tradition in the making!

    1. ryan

      the next woman to go in there better have a telegraph.

      1. The HellJack

        That’s going to get awkward (and crowded) when someone is forced to bring a Boy Scout and two semaphore flags.

  35. Jerrery

    Over-awkward means extra spoiler-y. Now we’re confirmed on at least three things for the story.

  36. Dedlok

    Way to keep a low profile, Amber! 😀

  37. Aegon01

    “Journalism” is now equal to “Biology” as a euphemism for sex. Spread the word.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      …and ‘Journalism’ is all about ‘spreading the word’. 😀

      1. fellixe

        …and the legs!

        1. Fraser

          Journalism: the process of giving nerdy boys with journals some highlights worth reading.

    2. Crumplepunch

      The satirical British publication Private Eye uses the euphemism “Conversations about Uganda” for sex, which I have never heard improved upon.

      1. Kernanator

        Are you British?

        Somehow, that doesn’t surprise me.

  38. Rikushadow5

    And then JoeXBillie became a thing.

  39. Trent

    …Now I’m really sad for Amber.

  40. Zoey

    cant stop laughing at the comments!

    1. Kernanator

      We’re like extended punchlines!

    2. Aizat

      Wow, someone who actually laughs at my joke and not out of pity. Thank you sir.

  41. Kernanator

    Amber’s thoughts: “I am so good at this secret identity stuff.”

    1. Aizat

      I think she’s new at this superhero thing.

    2. mechaqua

      Yelling really loud and looking like you have pee really bad when the subject of your secret alter ego comes up is great way to divert suspicion away from yourself.

  42. Sporkaganza

    OK, I actually thought Willis might actually try to surprise us with Amazi-Girl’s identity, but nope, she’s Amber.

    1. Steven

      You mean Ultra-Car.

      1. Drunken Nordmann

        No, he means Joe.

        1. Fraser

          Please, the clear answer is Joyce. Ethical backing, Over-emphasized naievete and punches that can hurt Joe.

        2. f.p.

          It’s Walky!

  43. Edd

    Wait, did she ever turn off the recorder?

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      “Oh my god…yes, Yes, YES!!!!”

      1. Zuche

        I don’t think that was part of the experience for Billie this time. At most, the Earth did a little redecorating.

        1. Ancestral Hamster

          Actually, that was Danny’s quote.

        2. Kernanator

          Yeah, what Billie actually said was “Can I quote you on that?”

  44. aydr

    :/ This strip certainly did start with the drama tag pre-pulled, huh… Hope this doesn’t get too ugly, I like Danny/Amber.

    1. fishsicles

      The drama tag is a multiversal constant. Pull it in one universe and you screw everyone over.

      1. vlademir1

        Yes… but is it an omniversal constant? Does it affect other continuities not part of the local multiversal subset, or is it just limited to universes where some variation on Robin exists* (ie the DoA-verse, the Walky-verse and their derived variants).

        It could also be just some variation on any member of the SP crew and their close associates. Add to that that if you consider that Ethan, Walkey and Danny as avatars of Willis’ ego, super-ego and id he’ll qualify as a variation and be plausibly suffering the effects of the drama tag as well.

        Maybe, I just like to overthink this kinda stuff…

  45. JT

    Um, when did Danny and Amber have anything happen that might make her “not sure”? I’m missing something here…

    1. MeHael

      Probably in class when he told her that he was flirting with her.

      1. Tom T.

        Oh, that’s right! Danny spoke to her once.

    2. Bill M.

      Did you forget when she required his butt?

  46. AndysDrawings

    I love that Joe is like nine feet tall.

  47. OhNoUDiNt

    I just don’t get enough insecure, sexually-agressive busty sluts jumping me in my room… for journalism.

  48. BornIn1142

    This makes me feel rather bad for Danny, actually. Billie obviously does not think highly of him and his efforts…

    1. Fraser

      Doesn’t Matter, had sex.

      As a bonus ruined her for Joe.

      1. begbert2

        She still seems to have all the relevant body parts, in mostly the right places. How is she ruined?

        1. vlademir1

          Bro Code, I’d suspect. Going after your best friend’s sloppy seconds is likely against it.

        2. Shippy McShipper

          I doubt he was even going to try. He’s a good wingman after all.

          Also see Fish, Sea et al.

  49. AJBulldis

    The last two panels confused me a bit, but I guess she thinks Danny is a twerp, despite apparently just sleeping with him, and Joe is absolute dynamite. Which he kind of is; just look at that guy!

    1. ryan

      danny isn’t someone she would normally sleep with. billie hinted at that in the first two strips this week.

  50. Kalan

    I thought all the people praying and telling were with Joyce?

  51. Aizat

    Hey, I just noticed that Joe has the standard superhero jaw.

  52. agentksilver

    Actually, if Billie thinks that Sal is Amazi-Girl, then that means she thinks she’s got it all figured out and never has to do journalism anyway. So of course she’d blow off her first chance at actual journalism for an easy chance of sex.

  53. sockv

    It’ll be interesting when she plays that tape…

  54. Fraser

    I feel like this was anti-drama. From ambers perspective billie probably wasn’t sleeping with him if she doesnt appear to like him and is more interested in Joe, so maybe it was just journalism. Also WTF HOLY DISTRACTION is someone on amazi-girls trail?

    Billie you diffused that like a pro. Now hopefully Danny will be distracted and chase after Amber with out any BS ‘what does this mean, billie I love you and by you I mean your breasts’ angst. This will leave you free to hook-up with Joe, and through him and Danny find out who amazi-girl is but choose not to disclose it as a favour to the boys for all the sex.

    1. begbert2

      The drama is coming – just wait. Danny is going to get cancer.

      Cancer cancer cancer cancercancer cancer.

      1. AJBulldis

        In his face?

    2. Michelle J Caboose

      I’m sorry, but I have to do the “grammar nazi” thing, here.One of my pet peeves in when people use “diffuse” when they mean “defuse.” “Defuse” means to disarm, as in a bomb (like removing the fuse, rendering it harmless). “Diffuse” means to spread something out over a large area (like those reed diffusers, which are used for dispersing the aroma of scented oils throughout a room).

      Remember: Defuse – to make less explosive, or render inert. Diffuse – What the USS enterprise does to something when Captain Kirk says “Beam it into space — maximum dispersal!”

  55. Jessica Sideways

    For Journalism!

  56. Rayrayrave

    Am I the only person who finds Danny highly attractive?

    1. Phillip Wilde

      No, you’re not. And I realize how strange that comment is combined with my grav.

  57. Crumplepunch

    “Now we get to the real journalism.”

    “Is that where we stop committing crimes?”

    “Hell no. That’s where we start committing the really good crimes.”

  58. Phillip Wilde

    Oh Billie, you lovable slut. Never change.

    1. f.p.

      Won’t her clothes get stinky?

  59. Phillip Wilde

    And my new favorite sexual euphemism is “journalism.”

  60. f.p.

    Probably not what’s going to happen, but I would have Amber try to jump Danny next. Danny would be weirded out because girls keep throwing themselves at him today. Amber would think “this one is gay too?” when he can’t perform so soon. Joe would be annoyed at still being stuck outside the room.

    1. Shippy McShipper

      Naah, she’s not the kind of girl to cut in line.

  61. Thomas

    Badmouthing your sex partner right after the act? Real classy, Billie.

  62. Confuzor

    JBF hair!!!

    1. Taigan

      no, ABF hair. (Almost)

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