Photo shopping together a plate filled with dicks, printing that out, then applying springs so it folds up to pocket size but shoots out to A3 size and keeping it ready so you can tell her you’ve got something for her to eat is the proper reaction to Mary.
I strongly suspect Mary is one of those people who would find bullshit pseudoscience to back up her bigotry if she were an atheist. The religion is not the source of her assholery; it is the vehicle for it.
Jeremiah
I strongly believe that Mary’s view will change according to what will allow her to be the shittiest person in the room. Like the world worst chameleon.
ESM
The DoA storyline I’d most like to see is one where Mary gets like 90% of the way through a redemption arc but blows it at the last minute, and part of why I want to see that is for the inevitable scene where everyone realizes “Woke” Mary is somehow even worse than normal Mary, to the point where when she inevitably relapses back into being a Christofascist everyone’s like “Oh thank god”.
Adam Black
You could just read Roomies for that
thejeff
Don’t really want to lean farther into “Woke is bad” than Roz and maybe some flashes of Joyce from earlier this semester.
Sirksome
I don’t think “woke is bad” was ever the takeaway from Roz or Joyce or anyone really. Roz is annoying sometimes because she speaks over others and seems to only care about being right most of the time, not because she’s more “woke”.
I really can’t wait for that word to fall out of fashion. It makes people sound like a dog barking at nothing.
?”WOKE! WOKE WOKE!”
Marillius
Saying a word made my an African American to describe the phenomenon of waking up to realize the system is inherently racist sounds like a dog barking because republicans abuse the word does, in fact, make you sound racist.
Nymph
Meh, religion is very often the source of people’s assholery as well. Hard to know what she’d be like if she hadn’t been indoctrinated with a lot of unfortunate shit first.
Bryy
Isn’t it Word of God that Mary’s parents are actually good people?
jflb96
That tends to be the way with most ideologies; people don’t do things because their ideology says that they should, they construct an ideology that matches what they want to do. ‘Before you were a fascist, you were a bully and an arsehole,’ as famed philosopher B.L. Mulligan says.
thejeff
Sometimes. Maybe even often.
But people are often raised within ideologies that indoctrinate them with harmful ideas that are really hard to shake. See Joyce – though really she broke out of it unreasonably fast. Or her father, who didn’t start to break out until Joyce confronted him.
jflb96
But when it came down to it, they didn’t confront their actions and twist them to match their ideology, they confronted their ideology and reshaped it so that their actions were allowable
Her deal? 40% off select gifsets and photoshoots on her OnlyPraise. It’s actually a pretty solid deal, some of her best stuff is eligible for the discount, including her outdoor set and the one with the hockey pucks.
Ever since she hooked up with Peter, Mary has been really slacking in judging everybody for their godless ways. There was the Halloween exhibition, but people had to come to see that voluntarily, and there was the time she tried to be smug at Jennifer about successfully interfering with her and Ruth’s relationship, but that fell apart due to drastically overestimating how much she’s the main character in Jennifer’s life.
It seems her deal is being too busy getting laid to get in anybody’s grill anymore, leaving her a quiet and harmless presence in the corridors. Here we see she doesn’t even have any interest in the recent spiritual developments of the one person on the floor besides herself she has used to say might not go directly to Hell.
We might even say Peter fixed Mary. With his penis.
She may be a true, true believer. The kind who is convinced there’s a God but a cynical attitude combined with lots of Bible reading and meeting other Christians have made her realise that God sucks, Christianism sucks, and Christians suck and there’s no joy to be found in this world that doesn’t risk displeasing the famously irate Creator who will happily condemn you to an eternity of grotesque suffering for the merest deviation from his “perfect will”.
Mary’s deal is that many, many times throughout every day at this godless satanic secular college (which she chose to attend) she’s being forced to encounter examples of people who do not believe, act, and speak exactly the same way her religious community/bubble does. While of course she isn’t selfless enough to be concerned for her own suffering in this, it is an unpleasant reminder of the way that Christians are subject to such horrible persecution in this country.
*Japan: keeping things weird since…well…long before 1991 probably…*
Dave the Inverted
I now find myself wondering if, depending on where it is and who’s there, Joyce might just show up to *next year’s* Halloween party “dressed” as Kekko Kamen.
It would be funny if Mary was actually too kinky for whatever that guy’s name was she was dating. I think it started with a “P” but I can’t remember if his name was Peter or Paul. She really got off on him being naked in front of people though. Just more proof Mary is the other side Joyce. One is into watching the other is into others watching.
But yes, Peter Paul and Mary was a folk trio composed of Peter Yarrow, (Noel) Paul Stookey, and Mary Travers. Known for songs like Puff the Magic Dragon, There Is Love, and Where Have All the Flowers Gone.
Mark
Ah, the Good Old Stuff. Give them a listen — you might like it.
I could definitely picture her just letting her obscene amount of repression go all at once for just one moment and scaring him off. He definitely seemed -very- uncomfortable during Halloween.
It’d be a little sad if that were the case, if Mary weren’t awful.
Yeah, that makes sense. Because she appears so infrequently, Mary kind of has “eras”. Like
1. A semi-sympathetic villain who wants to be friends with people but just can’t stop herself from being a judgemental asshole who pushes them away (the first few appearances)
2. After she throws away the olive branches, she’s more antagonistic and jumps straight to being an asshole (Transphobia to Carla, blackmailing Ruth) and the nicest thing that you can say about her was that she probably didn’t intend to push Ruth to a literal suicide attempt and “only” intended to threaten her. That arc ends with Mary getting punched and everyone clapping and she’s basically a pariah after that.
3. Then she dates Peter Paul and turns into a weird homophobic version of Galasso, where she’s still evil but so ludicrous and ineffectual that no one cares, to the point that Becky and Dina seem to actually kind of enjoy having her around (a potentially funny dynamic, IMO).
Now I guess we’re in the Punished Mary era. It almost feels like she’s just given up. Not that she’s grown or changed but she’s realized that expressing her hateful opinions always gets her punched. That’s probably reading way too much into like two lines, though, and I’m not sure what you’d do with “Mary is still evil but doesn’t want to do anything villainous because she knows she’ll lose”. Maybe she’s going to fall into a depression and Joyce helps her and accidentally rekindles Mary’s love of villainy or something, I dunno.
Wait, is Punished Mary anything like Goth Ethan? I mean, he’s essentially Self-Punished Ethan. Is Mary mourning the loss of Peter Paul? I mean, yeah, he probably ditched her because she was a narcissist, but she might blame herself for it….? Or am I being too generous?
you can eat candy in the shower, no one is stopping you. May I also point out that eating and orange in the shower is absolutely lovely (choose the seedless kind)
I’d probably wanna take the rims off first, but a shower orange does sound appealing. Any unwelcome stickiness gets washed away immediately, and then you smell kinda orangey? Yeah, I could see it.
I’ve already tried shower tacos, burritos, nachos, ramen, apples, cantaloupe, carrots, broccoli, p****, cauliflower, hot dogs, bratwurst, corn on the cob, ice cream, bacon, hero sandwiches, Pop-Tarts, protein shakes, assorted beverages (hard and soft), and pizza, so I’ll be sure to try this “orange” next time the chance arises.
Nymph
I’ve only tried a few of these, but I can’t recommend number 9 enough tbh.
only ever had beer in the shower. had to make sure the beer was barely above freezing, and the water was super hot. And only did this after jogging back to my dorm room after donating blood, as kind of a treat.
139 thoughts on “Super nakees”
Ana Chronistic
can’t decide if flashing or mooning would be a funnier knee-jerk reaction to Mary
NGPZ
why not both at the same time? :p
cbwroses
Wouldn’t that essentially mean being super f*cking nakees?
Schpoonman
Flashing if Joe is present so he blushes, mooning if just Mary.
Max
If she were a boy she could give Mary the fruit bowl. Best of both worlds.
Furie
Photo shopping together a plate filled with dicks, printing that out, then applying springs so it folds up to pocket size but shoots out to A3 size and keeping it ready so you can tell her you’ve got something for her to eat is the proper reaction to Mary.
Sirksome
What is Mary’s deal?
Zero
She’s mean.
True Survivor
She does seem remarkably sedate.
On a likely unrelated note: her jacket seems similar to some of Sal’s.
Jeremiah
Well being fundamentalist christian and far right asshole for once.
Cassie
I strongly suspect Mary is one of those people who would find bullshit pseudoscience to back up her bigotry if she were an atheist. The religion is not the source of her assholery; it is the vehicle for it.
Jeremiah
I strongly believe that Mary’s view will change according to what will allow her to be the shittiest person in the room. Like the world worst chameleon.
ESM
The DoA storyline I’d most like to see is one where Mary gets like 90% of the way through a redemption arc but blows it at the last minute, and part of why I want to see that is for the inevitable scene where everyone realizes “Woke” Mary is somehow even worse than normal Mary, to the point where when she inevitably relapses back into being a Christofascist everyone’s like “Oh thank god”.
Adam Black
You could just read Roomies for that
thejeff
Don’t really want to lean farther into “Woke is bad” than Roz and maybe some flashes of Joyce from earlier this semester.
Sirksome
I don’t think “woke is bad” was ever the takeaway from Roz or Joyce or anyone really. Roz is annoying sometimes because she speaks over others and seems to only care about being right most of the time, not because she’s more “woke”.
Taffy
I really can’t wait for that word to fall out of fashion. It makes people sound like a dog barking at nothing.
?”WOKE! WOKE WOKE!”
Marillius
Saying a word made my an African American to describe the phenomenon of waking up to realize the system is inherently racist sounds like a dog barking because republicans abuse the word does, in fact, make you sound racist.
Nymph
Meh, religion is very often the source of people’s assholery as well. Hard to know what she’d be like if she hadn’t been indoctrinated with a lot of unfortunate shit first.
Bryy
Isn’t it Word of God that Mary’s parents are actually good people?
jflb96
That tends to be the way with most ideologies; people don’t do things because their ideology says that they should, they construct an ideology that matches what they want to do. ‘Before you were a fascist, you were a bully and an arsehole,’ as famed philosopher B.L. Mulligan says.
thejeff
Sometimes. Maybe even often.
But people are often raised within ideologies that indoctrinate them with harmful ideas that are really hard to shake. See Joyce – though really she broke out of it unreasonably fast. Or her father, who didn’t start to break out until Joyce confronted him.
jflb96
But when it came down to it, they didn’t confront their actions and twist them to match their ideology, they confronted their ideology and reshaped it so that their actions were allowable
All-Purpose Guru
Judgy asshole religious zealot.
Taffy
Her deal? 40% off select gifsets and photoshoots on her OnlyPraise. It’s actually a pretty solid deal, some of her best stuff is eligible for the discount, including her outdoor set and the one with the hockey pucks.
Dave the Inverted
I feel like I’m going to regret asking this, but what exactly is she doing with/to the hockey pucks?
Nymph
You have to pay to find out, that’s the whole point of advertisements!
Taffy
As mentioned, it’s behind a pay wall, but I’ll give you a hint: Missouri hockey fans are gonna love it.
Michael Steamweed
It’s too extreme for some Canadians, but the Wisconsinites love it.
Needfuldoer
She’s a judgmental little old church lady at heart.
Amelie Wikström
Ever since she hooked up with Peter, Mary has been really slacking in judging everybody for their godless ways. There was the Halloween exhibition, but people had to come to see that voluntarily, and there was the time she tried to be smug at Jennifer about successfully interfering with her and Ruth’s relationship, but that fell apart due to drastically overestimating how much she’s the main character in Jennifer’s life.
It seems her deal is being too busy getting laid to get in anybody’s grill anymore, leaving her a quiet and harmless presence in the corridors. Here we see she doesn’t even have any interest in the recent spiritual developments of the one person on the floor besides herself she has used to say might not go directly to Hell.
We might even say Peter fixed Mary. With his penis.
Hacksaw
Peter, the Rock…
Hard
Pylgrim
She may be a true, true believer. The kind who is convinced there’s a God but a cynical attitude combined with lots of Bible reading and meeting other Christians have made her realise that God sucks, Christianism sucks, and Christians suck and there’s no joy to be found in this world that doesn’t risk displeasing the famously irate Creator who will happily condemn you to an eternity of grotesque suffering for the merest deviation from his “perfect will”.
Reltzik
Mary’s deal is that many, many times throughout every day at this godless satanic secular college (which she chose to attend) she’s being forced to encounter examples of people who do not believe, act, and speak exactly the same way her religious community/bubble does. While of course she isn’t selfless enough to be concerned for her own suffering in this, it is an unpleasant reminder of the way that Christians are subject to such horrible persecution in this country.
Vanessa
lol, perfect.
IntangibleMatter
Is Super Nakees ever going to team up with Amazi-Girl and Nightguy?
John Campbell
It’s just a name change for the Whiteboard Ding-Dong Bandit, because her old supranym was kind of unwieldy. She’s already teamed up with Amazi-Girl.
Dday
I think Super Nakees wears gloves and a domino mask. And boots.
ValdVin
…and Super Nakees’ cover job is
a cartoonists for the IDSa live model for art class.Emil
Kekko Kamen already exists you know:)
*Japan: keeping things weird since…well…long before 1991 probably…*
Dave the Inverted
I now find myself wondering if, depending on where it is and who’s there, Joyce might just show up to *next year’s* Halloween party “dressed” as Kekko Kamen.
Taffy
I didn’t know, but now I know. DVDs are fairly affordable, too.
Michael Steamweed
Yesterday, I did not know about a thing. And, now, today, I do know about that thing. I can only say “Huh.”
Dday
Siggghhh I actually did know about that, in the recesses of my brain, thanks for digging it out.
Blume
Joyce is so… Joyce. Love that for her.
shadowcell
Joyce Gets Super Fucking Nakees: A Dumbing of Age Pornographique
Michael Steamweed
In which we only see her shower. I’d read that.
IniquitousKing
Betting Mary’s single again.
Sirksome
It would be funny if Mary was actually too kinky for whatever that guy’s name was she was dating. I think it started with a “P” but I can’t remember if his name was Peter or Paul. She really got off on him being naked in front of people though. Just more proof Mary is the other side Joyce. One is into watching the other is into others watching.
Jeff K!
His name is “Peter Paul”, because it’s a pun on the folk singers “Peter, Paul and Mary”
Jay
Wait, as in the same Peter, Paul and Mary referenced in the Brittney Spears song? They’re real?
Rabbit
I can’t tell if you’re joking
Both are a reference to the bible
Taffy
Come on, nobody’s read that thing.
sultryglebe
But yes, Peter Paul and Mary was a folk trio composed of Peter Yarrow, (Noel) Paul Stookey, and Mary Travers. Known for songs like Puff the Magic Dragon, There Is Love, and Where Have All the Flowers Gone.
Mark
Ah, the Good Old Stuff. Give them a listen — you might like it.
dalniente
TimAllenSantaClauseAging.gif, lol.
IniquitousKing
I could definitely picture her just letting her obscene amount of repression go all at once for just one moment and scaring him off. He definitely seemed -very- uncomfortable during Halloween.
It’d be a little sad if that were the case, if Mary weren’t awful.
ESM
Yeah, that makes sense. Because she appears so infrequently, Mary kind of has “eras”. Like
1. A semi-sympathetic villain who wants to be friends with people but just can’t stop herself from being a judgemental asshole who pushes them away (the first few appearances)
2. After she throws away the olive branches, she’s more antagonistic and jumps straight to being an asshole (Transphobia to Carla, blackmailing Ruth) and the nicest thing that you can say about her was that she probably didn’t intend to push Ruth to a literal suicide attempt and “only” intended to threaten her. That arc ends with Mary getting punched and everyone clapping and she’s basically a pariah after that.
3. Then she dates Peter Paul and turns into a weird homophobic version of Galasso, where she’s still evil but so ludicrous and ineffectual that no one cares, to the point that Becky and Dina seem to actually kind of enjoy having her around (a potentially funny dynamic, IMO).
Now I guess we’re in the Punished Mary era. It almost feels like she’s just given up. Not that she’s grown or changed but she’s realized that expressing her hateful opinions always gets her punched. That’s probably reading way too much into like two lines, though, and I’m not sure what you’d do with “Mary is still evil but doesn’t want to do anything villainous because she knows she’ll lose”. Maybe she’s going to fall into a depression and Joyce helps her and accidentally rekindles Mary’s love of villainy or something, I dunno.
Deanatay
Wait, is Punished Mary anything like Goth Ethan? I mean, he’s essentially Self-Punished Ethan. Is Mary mourning the loss of Peter Paul? I mean, yeah, he probably ditched her because she was a narcissist, but she might blame herself for it….? Or am I being too generous?
True Survivor
For a brief second I read “shower caddy” as “shower candy” and was wondering why nobody had ever told me about this paradigm-shifting invention.
Nymph
you can eat candy in the shower, no one is stopping you. May I also point out that eating and orange in the shower is absolutely lovely (choose the seedless kind)
Yumi
Love a shower orange.
Taffy
I’d probably wanna take the rims off first, but a shower orange does sound appealing. Any unwelcome stickiness gets washed away immediately, and then you smell kinda orangey? Yeah, I could see it.
I’ve already tried shower tacos, burritos, nachos, ramen, apples, cantaloupe, carrots, broccoli, p****, cauliflower, hot dogs, bratwurst, corn on the cob, ice cream, bacon, hero sandwiches, Pop-Tarts, protein shakes, assorted beverages (hard and soft), and pizza, so I’ll be sure to try this “orange” next time the chance arises.
Nymph
I’ve only tried a few of these, but I can’t recommend number 9 enough tbh.
Michael Steamweed
Same. 5/5; recommend again.
Morleuca
both of them,even
Morleuca
only ever had beer in the shower. had to make sure the beer was barely above freezing, and the water was super hot. And only did this after jogging back to my dorm room after donating blood, as kind of a treat.
Mark
Well, I would expect cotton candy/candyfloss to be a disgusting failure, but chocolate contains enough fat to make it water-resistant.
Chaucer59
Call her a f@$&ing tw@t, Joyce. That’ll convince her.
Jon S.
Especially if you can pronounce the “@”, “$”, and “&”.
Dday
Only Private Carl James “Beetle” Bailey is capable of pronouncing such a grawlix.
ValdVin
He learned from the best: Sergeant Orville Snorkel.
Nymph