148

Bulb
Posted on April 8, 2013 by David M Willis

148 thoughts on “Bulb”

  1. Tom Speelman

    Because, Walky, that’s what girls are supposed to do. Dudes are intrinsically dumb.

    1. Yotomoe

      While I don’t agree with what you say I will fight to the death your right to say it.

      1. Totz the Plaid

        I’m not sure if the lack of “for” in that comment was intentional or not, and that makes it all the better!

        1. Crotonhurst

          Dude you are Totz plaid!
          OK, I got it out of my system now

        2. CrazyPete

          Hey we have the same avatar

      2. I dont know what to put here

        Voltomoe.

    2. Jenny Creed

      I think dudes are usually brought up with low expectations that encourages them to not develop the same higher brain functions expected of ladydudes. Nothing that can’t be fixed.

  2. Yotomoe

    Walky, is just trying to find stuff to be mad about at this point.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      Maybe Walky just isn’t the type to ask people to do things for them, I can relate to that.

      1. timemonkey

        Walky: low maintenance or lowest maintenance?

        1. Yotomoe

          If his maintenance was stock, Dorothy would have offed herself by now.

        2. Plasma Mongoose

          Just make sure you feed him some McNuggets and he’s good to go.

        3. timemonkey

          He doesn’t even require that level of maintenance, he’ll provide his own mcnuggets!

          Honestly, I think that’s kinda why Dorothy likes him so much, he’s completely independant, nothing Walky desires is dependant on Dorothy and he’s even shown that he respects her own goals.

        4. Notebooked

          That’s pretty much what I thought — they have fun together, but they have fun separately as well. Dorothy wants to be independent because she doesn’t want someone interfering with her goals, Walky wants to be independent because he wants to be a totally rad single guy with a house made of Lego and waterslides. (Which is pretty much the same reason. Huh.)

          New Grav, eh? Where’s it from?

        5. IO

          I assume grav is a term for their display image.
          It’s one of Hexidecimal’s faces. Hexidecimal being a villain from the CG cartoon Reboot from the 90’s. It’s totally radical.

        6. Roborat

          While I knew it was Hex (loved that show, and saw the creators at Calgary comic con), I was having more fun thinking of it as a very pissed off V.

        7. Robert

          He’s a low maintenance-maintenance man.

      2. dcmeserve

        Aaarg! A comma slice followed by a comma splice!

        1. Raoullefere

          I know. Does that make you want to smother them in their sleep, too, or is that just me?

        2. Raoullefere

          Er, somehow that wrote out a little harsher than I intended.

          I’d only smother them a little bit. Honest! Then, of course, I’d salute Der Grammar Führer.

        3. Markus

          Too bad your German grammar is a bit off in that. :-p
          (“salute” takes an object in the accusative; this should be “den Grammar Führer.”)

        4. Stephen

          Grammar correction across two languages means extra points for Markus! 🙂

      3. Robin

        Me too. I don’t ask people to do things for me, I wallow in my ineptitude until someone offers to help me.

    2. lightsabermario

      I, think you typed that wrong.

  3. Kernanator

    Because you have a spine made out of styrofoam.

    1. Doctor_Who

      If that’s what Dorothy looks for in a guy, she never should have dumped Danny.

      1. Kernanator

        No, see, Danny’s spine is made out of paper. She likes her guys spineless, but not THAT spineless.

        1. Plasma Mongoose

          Also Danny was too much vanilla and not enough caramel.

        2. Kernanator

          Okay, Plasma, who is this blonde girl with some kind of hair decoration and what looks like a bag strap?

        3. Plasma Mongoose

          Clue: Does the series Inspector Gadget ring a bell?

        4. Audiophillie

          Hi Penny!

        5. Josh

          There’s only one true Penny.

        6. timemonkey

          Greatest Penny of them all.

        7. HMRC4EVR

          Looks like Penny is a little more grown up there.

          I did have the strangest Inspector Gadget related fanfic idea the other day: Penny, Jade Chan, Miko from Prime and Amy Mizuno/Sailor Mercury move in together and solve mysteries!

          Sort of like a younger Golden Girls but with more mysteries and less hot flashes. Still lot of cheesecake though (insert rimshot here)

        8. Yotomoe

          Ninja’d by Kernanator.

        9. Kernanator

          …I ninja’d somebody.

          D-Do I get a prize?

          Is there a medal or something?

        10. Jereko

          There is a ninja medal. We show it to you, then we take it away.

      2. Yotomoe

        His was made out of paper.

  4. Plasma Mongoose

    “Curse you logic, CURSE YOU!”

    1. Doctor_Who

      “My old nemesis, common sense. We meet again!”

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Logic is a dangerous thing for a Time Lord. 😀

        1. Aizat

          Logic, my dear Plas, is for people to be wrong with authority.

    2. Aizat

      Screw logic, I’m a robot.

      1. HMRC4EVR

        Autobot/Decepticon

        Guardian/Renagade

        Protecton/Terrorcore (feeling old school on that one!)

        1. Aizat

          You wanted old school? Tetsujin 28, Mazinger Z, Getter Robo.

        2. 6Qubed

          My first Walkyverse comment. Hello world!

          Speaking of Go-Bots, I used to watch that all the time as a kid and my mom taught me a quick and handy spagetti sauce recipe using GOBOTS as a mnemonic:

          Garlic
          Oregano
          Basil
          Onion powder (I hate real onions)
          Tomatoes
          Sauce

          Heat on medium, season to taste, and enjoy!

        3. David

          I am going to break your heart, but this isn’t your first Walkyverse comment, because this isn’t the Walkyverse. 😉

        4. 6Qubed

          …

          …

          …

          FUCK

          (it’s still nice to be wherever the hell I am)

    3. Mogotoo

      He should have known better and taken that 8am class with Dorothy.

  5. Wonder Wig

    Good Walky, go fetch.

  6. Derek

    Story of my life??

    I always feel bad for asking people do help me with things, I wish they’d ask favours in return!

  7. Raen

    This is Walky angry?

    1. Josh

      No. This is Walky Angry: http://www.itswalky.com/d/20030720.html

  8. Yotomoe

    Even though I know that it’s just small and sketchy cuz it’s a background object, I like to imagine the fire escape plans are just crudely drawn in crayon because the school can’t afford to print one out for every dorm room.

    1. TheKelliestKelly

      Thank you for my new head canon

      1. Totz the Plaid

        Seconded.

    2. Raoullefere

      Of course, it could simply be that administrator in charge of safety isn’t allowed to use anything with a point any more.

  9. timemonkey

    Walky? You may want to keep in mind a few of the things she asked you to do was feel her up and go to bed with her. For that you can deal with grabbing lightbulbs and occasionally studying.

    1. Kernanator

      For each grabbed boob, he must grab and replace 1 lightbulb over the course of their relationship.

      1. Yotomoe

        This may not seem like much now, but by the end of the relationship you will be several hundred lightbulbs in debt.

        1. Mogotoo

          The solution? Get married.

        2. N0083rP00F

          But then he will be changing lightbulbs … and other things (diapers?) …. for the rest of his days…. or longer ….

      2. timemonkey

        What if he just rubs them?

        1. Kernanator

          Then a genie comes out of her.

        2. Saru

          Oh dear, hilarious mental image.

        3. N0083rP00F

          It’s been done but don’t try looking for the V***genie unless you … you know …. are prepared for it …..

        4. Roborat

          Ah, fellow Oglaf fans I take it.

        5. Kernanator

          I don’t know about N0083rP00F or timemonkey, but no. My mind just went there on its own.

        6. Tenn

          You say “genie”, I say “hygiene malfunction”.

  10. Bronze Knight

    I think the light is finally dawning on Walky on how these womenfolk work.

    (BaDum-Tish)

    1. Kernanator

      Well of course it is! He isn’t the dimmest bulb in the chandelier you know!

      1. Yotomoe

        He’s simply radiating anger after being diffused like that, though.

        1. Kernanator

          He’s resistant to orders.

        2. Yotomoe

          He just knows watts up.

        3. Bronze Knight

          Its these little moments that Amplify relationships to the next level.

        4. Kernanator

          Unfortunately, that resistance isn’t very conductive to a good relationship.

        5. Mogotoo

          Eh, who knows how far these two will go. It’s hard to tell in the current situation.

        6. Yotomoe

          What’s the bright idea making a pun like that?

        7. smilr

          If he does learn how women work, he could say this experience was illuminating.

        8. Yotomoe

          A shining example of chivalry.

        9. Andiemus

          Brilliant.

  11. Juliecat

    So is this Dorothy’s dorm room? Will Walky get to have the makeouts?

    1. Aizat

      Makeout in the dark, now that’s romantic(said the guy who doesn’t even have a girlfriend)

      1. Yotomoe

        I agree (said the guy who cries himself to sleep every night)

        1. HeatPhoenix

          you too, like me, will become the feels.

          do not be afraid

    2. Mogotoo

      Dorothy’s in front, so my guess is yes.

      1. John

        The way she likes it.

    3. Stephen

      Of course! Fixing stuff is inherently sexy.

  12. Icalasari

    Dammit Willis why’d you change scenes when things were getting good? D:

  13. Wonder Wig

    How many Walkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?

    1. Yotomoe

      3.
      One to screw in the lightbulb,
      One to get Nachitos on his shirt
      and A 3rd to get them all Mcnuggets.

    2. Mogotoo

      Two.

      One to screw in the ball, and another to jump out a window.

      1. Mogotoo

        Woah, bulb, what the hell am I saying?

      2. Josh

        Screw the ball? I think you are doing sex wrong. 😉

        1. begbert2

          It beats waiting til afterwards; then you’re risking her running off and leaving you with just a shoe.

    3. Icalasari

      One

      BLAST OFF!

      …Wait I got lost seeing the other two count down

    4. timemonkey

      Zero.

      Walky just fetches the lightbulbs, Dorothy changes them.

    5. Mogotoo

      -1.

      Replacing a light bulb gives you a Walky.

    6. Iak

      -2

      OH GOD THEY’RE MULTIPLYING

    7. Raoullefere

      It’s a difficult question. First, we have to decide just how small we can shrink our Walkies. Then we have to see if they really feel that way about one another.

    8. Zababcd

      ~100000000000000. Because they don’t consider it worth the effort of doing themselves, so it can only occur as an incidental result of the lightbulb’s response to their gravitational pull.

  14. ridtom

    “How DARE you use logical arguments! Next thing you’ll want me to be REASONABLE!”

    1. Aizat

      Or worse, you want me to use MATH!

      1. Davriel

        “Your logic does not affect me!”

        1. Aizat

          “Your logic has no power here”

        2. Logic

          I have no influence in this realm.

  15. Iceholder

    There is… logic… in what he says.

    1. Wack'd

      OF COURSE! DON’T YOU KNOW ANYTHING ABOUT SCIENCE!

  16. LtSaraD

    because sexy and smart.

  17. John

    I’ve lost track of time. Are we still inside the two-week Danny-will-jump-out-the-window-if-Walky-gets-into-Dorothy’s-pants limit?

    1. timemonkey

      I think we might be on week three.

  18. Nono

    Am I the only one surprised at how Joe of all people is second to last on the poll? I mean, it’s Joe. Does nobody remember him in his underwear?

    1. ADHadh

      Sorry, he’s been out-Joed by Jacob.

      1. Josh

        Looks like this calls for a Joe off!

  19. Uniqueantique

    Close choice between Jacob and Mike. Love Mike my favorite of all time. But Jacob is for eye candy and then some.
    Joe thinks well enough of himself that being low on poll won’t bother him.
    Logic does not apply to Walky and Dorothy. Most mismatched duo here. But cute.

  20. Raoullefere

    If I were you, Walky, I’d be more upset about being nicknamed ‘Dangit.’

  21. teasugarsalt

    She’s wearing your stupid cheese shirt, what more do you WANT?

    1. Josh

      He wants people to appreciate cheese shirts for what they are, and not discriminate against them by calling them stupid.

      Who would want anything less?

    2. Leonou

      Dorothy had to ask him to pick a piece of clothing for her … therefore asking her to wear an awesome cheese shirt was still following her orders !
      She’s totally using him as a tool !

  22. Notebooked

    In case of fire, sit down and draw with crayons.

  23. Zababcd

    What do you mean, ‘maybe a step-ladder’? Do you need a step ladder or don’t you? Based on the ceilings in every panel of the comic so far, I’d guess that she needs a step-ladder. Maybe even an ordinary ladder.

    Actually, she seems to be looking almost directly upwards at the lightbulb from right in the corner of the room. That suggests that the roof is extremely high, so that even a small angle from the wall translates to a reasonable horizontal difference. I have created a helpful diagram to illustrate this point.

    Helpful diagram

    1. Zababcd

      Oh no. I have found the single unprofessional component of my diagram. I misspelled ‘reasonable’. I assure you that the error was merely typographical in nature.

      1. Leonou

        Actually there is an other mistake.
        You remembered to spot the Feral Dina in the room but misplaced her. Dina ALWAYS hides behind the door, so that when she reveals herself you can’t escape !

      2. Roborat

        Dude, pull yourself together. Focus!

    2. Notebooked

      …Diagrams? Faz, is that you?

      1. timemonkey

        Perhaps it is Wen?

    3. taekwondogirl

      Adding in “maybe” to an addition to a request is a subconscious attempt to seem less demanding.

    4. begbert2

      Given that the light switch is at shoulder level, maybe she’s just that short.

  24. Zaxares

    I actually understand how Walky feels here. As someone who hates asking people to do anything for him, it is exceedingly rare for me to ask favours of anyone. I will find a way to do it myself if at all possible, only turning to others as a last resort. While I don’t mind helping people out if they ask for it, over the course of a long relationship, I could easily see why Walky might start to feel put upon if Dorothy is always asking him to do things while Walky never does likewise.

  25. Weebles

    I’m afraid I don’t understand why him not asking her to do things of course means she has to ask him to do things?

    I’m not saying she shouldn’t ask, I’m just saying her explanation doesn’t make sense to me.

    1. madd

      Her explanation makes sense if you read Walky’s question. He didn’t ask why she asked him to do things, but why it was always her asking him.

      1. Weebles

        Ah, hm. Yes, that’s technically accurate, if one person never asks anything then even a minimal amount of ‘asking for things’ is ‘doing all the asking’ in the relationship.

        I mistook it for meaning she asked for things a LOT when we don’t necessarily know that. Presumably Walky at least feels a bit of that, and I still assume he’s asking because he feels she asks him to do things more often than he thinks is appropriate rather than that he’s pointing out a random factoid concerning the amount of asking in the relationship.

  26. Volkai

    I would buy and read “Dorothy & Walky”.

    That is all.

  27. Dralzz

    Sort of an odd university, where the students are expected to change their own light bulbs, and where the supply closet is apparently just open for student use.
    I work at a fairly large university, and “maintenance request” is typically the response to any problem like that.

    1. Wack'd

      We’re expected to change our own lightbulbs at my school, though in fairness we don’t get a ceiling fixture. Just a large standing lamp.

      Lightbulbs are available to us at the RAs office.

  28. Norv

    Is it just me or does it look like the fire escape plans direct you to jump out the window?

    1. Ashley

      Well, natural selection needs all the help it can get nowadays.

    2. Led

      It’s actually Sal’s schedule that has winded up pinned to that door for reasons unknown.

  29. Tomas

    This would be a perfect opportunity to introduce the Men Rights Activists to DoA. They could burst into the room right now like the Spanish Inquisition.

    1. Aizat

      NOBODY EXPECTS THE MEN RIGHTS ACTIVISTS INQUISITION. OUR CHIEF WEAPON IS SURPRISE. SURPRISE AND FEAR.

      1. N0083rP00F

        …. and ruthless efficiency…. Our *three* weapons are fear, surprise, and ruthless efficiency…and an almost fanatical devotion to the Pope….

        1. Raen

          I think they consider his values feminized. A very misogynistic kind of feminized.

      2. Robin

        OUR TWO CHIEF WEAPONS ARE SURPRISE, FEAR AND AN UNBELIEVABLY INTRICATE PERSECUTION COMPLEX.

  30. kartvizit

    Hehehehe 😀

  31. Brainwright

    That answer made no sense at all.

  32. Aaron Bourque

    But . . . that DOESN’T make sense. She asks him to do stuff because HE doesn’t ask HER?? What?

    1. Rowen Morland

      That’s just why it seems like he is always on the receiving end. After all she wants him to ask her to do more things.

    2. Josh

      You may have misread it like I did the first 5 times.

      Walky doesn’t ask why she’s always asking him to do things; he’s asking her why it always seems to be her asking the favors in their relationship.

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