193

Basket
Posted on February 15, 2016 by David M Willis

193 thoughts on “Basket”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    Because why put off for tomorrow what you can do next week?

    1. Tabitha Desanto

      Shittiness postponed? Seems like Billie is acting shitty now.

      1. Stephen R. Bierce

        There is a J. Wellington Wimpy joke in here somewhere.

      2. Dana

        Seems to me the shittyiness was when she made a promise she should have known she couldn’t keep and this is the inevitable aftermath of it, not the act itself.

        1. Clif

          In her defense, she didn’t know she couldn’t keep it when she made it.

        2. Rutee

          That’s the true beauty of ‘should have known’, you get to ignore all the good and not so good reasons why it isn’t that obvious.

          I dunno, it’s hard to be mad. It seems unlikely Becky thought this was a permanent solution. Billie bought her a week of relative comfort and space from Joyce.

        3. John

          When getting out of a relationship alive messes up your plans, you maybe ought to rethink your plans.

        4. Rutee

          I dunno, my plans end with me not leaving my relationship alive, but I’m open to the possibility of us growing in opposite directions over the coming decades. And uh, Billie definitely was planning for *That* kind of ending first and foremost. She didn’t expect them to end up dead, on a pretty real level.

          But that’s got precious little to do with Billie’s hypothetical shittiness to Becky. I mean, Billie /feeling/ that way is understandable, and it’s not exactly a lot of notice, but at the same time, in concrete terms… she’s given Becky more than anyone else in the comic. The concrete isn’t everything, but one week of bed space (or 5 days, if you prefer) and 20 bucks trumps a few days of dinner (Even if one of those nights was nice dinner). And considering that the only connection to Becky she had was “That annoying friend of Joyce’s badgering me on my sexuality”, that’s not nothing. It’s not enough, but it’s not like it’s not enough because she’s terrible. It’s because there’s not really such a thing as ‘enough’ that you can give wtihout actually owning property in your own name.

        5. Dana

          Yeah, I meant to go farther in defending Billie. Rereading it I don’t think I come off as defending her in the slightest, and she deserved even more than I intended.

        6. Cerberus

          NRE is a hell of a blinder to sensible choices. Part of why it’s good to wait until at least a year in a relationship before making major life decisions.

        7. Skizz

          Yeah, poor Becky has suffered through a free bed. How shitty of Billie to force her into that. Billie did what she could, while she could.

        8. DarkoNeko

          She didn’t promise anything.

    2. Leorale

      The windowpane is broken, and the rain is coming in.
      If somebody don’t fix it, I’ll be soaking to my skin.
      But if we wait a day or two, the rain may go away
      And we don’t need a window, on such a sunny day!

      1. Needfuldoer

        Simpsons Sesame Street did it!

    3. Plasma Mongoose

      Procrastination works on two beliefs, one, why do today when you can do it tomorrow and two, tomorrow never comes.

      1. thejeff

        Why put off until tomorrow what you can put off til next week?

        And maybe the horse will learn to sing.

  2. Doctor_Who

    Wait, when did Billie turn into me?

    1. Dana

      Her most recent regeneration.

  3. Hannah

    Yayyyy procrastination. 😀

    1. Pat

      I never get around to procrastination.

      1. TamiDOA

        I’m to busy with avoidance and denial to get around to procrastination.

        1. Willinwoods

          What is this “denial” that you speak of?

        2. TamiDOA

          What denial? There is no denial! I have no idea what you’re talking about!

          🙂

        3. TamiDOA

          Denial squared? Or Denial(Denial) = 0?

    2. mystseekyr

      Mom says if I procrastinate, my life will fill with sorrow. I don’t know what that big word means, I’ll look it up tomorrow.

    3. Zarancorde

      Procrastination is like masturbation. It feels good while you’re doing it, but really, you’re just f**king yourself.

  4. Mandy

    Oh Sal, if only you knew about the updated status of Billie and Ruth’s relationship.

  5. Tommy Fresh

    1pm Sunday afternoon

    so like

    3 months from now

    1. gkheyf

      thanks for the estimate. math is hard

    2. David M Willis

      pfffft

      3 months from now is saturday afternoon

      1. Suchipi

        Heh

      2. Doctor_Who

        There was once a Marvel comic where they explained that the reason Quicksilver is kind of a jerk is that everyone else is so slow in comparison to him that his life is like constantly being stuck in traffic.

        Being left in suspense for how DoA storylines are going to be resolved finally allows me to relate.

        1. Touchfuzzy

          Seriously loved that issue. With all of the X-Factor characters going to a therapist. The whole sequence of him explaining why everyone annoys him is great. Its in X-Factor #87.

        2. Wolf of Words

          There was also an issue I remember where he was eating dinner with the Inhumans and he thinks to himself that he has to eat slowly. He concentrates really hard on taking slow, careful bites and then looks up. Everyone almost has their first bite to their lips. That feels like DOA sometimes too. “What? They’ve only just got out of bed? It’s been like a week!”

        3. Emperor Norton

          Does Quicksilver sleep at all?

          If so, shouldn’t that be something that looks like quick naps taken every few “human” minutes? I mean, if we assume he registers information about a hundred times faster than a human*, then one second is a minute and forty seconds to him. 16 hours awake for us is like 9 minutes and 36 seconds to him. After which he will need to sleep for almost five minutes**. So whenever he’s in a bad situation, he’s got about thirteen minutes to solve it before his brain goes groggy enough that he cannot be trusted to do the job perfectly.

          *Number pulled out of my ass because I clearly have no idea just how quick his brain really works.

          **Now, this is based on the typical 8-hour sleep rhythm, which in itself is a rather forced/”artificial” sleep cycle born out of the industrial revolution. Maybe he likes to take smaller naps throughout his “day” that are so quick, people hardly even notice it.

        4. Doctor_Who

          Don’t know how it works for Quicksilver, but I know an issue of Flash once had him reveal that he takes micro-naps when people pause while talking.

        5. FireSTK

          Depends on the writer. One comic shown the Flash able to decelerate his perception on some conscious level. It sucks that Quicksilver can’t do that.

      3. Orion Fury

        eh, you can cheat.

  6. shadowcell

    1pm sunday afternoon, ha! more like 1am monday morning

    1. JustCheetoDust

      Just in time for the U.S. elections!

  7. Leorale

    Well drinking kinda sounds like thinking, and Billie will do one of those two things.

  8. Cacturne

    GREAT

    Now im gonna be worried about Dina for at least 24 hours.

    1. Someone

      tomorrow: Danny and Amber

      Cacturne: DAMMIT!

      1. Emperor Norton

        Two days from now: Dorothy and Carla.

        Cacturne: DAMN YOU TO HELL, WILLIS!

        1. Someone

          3 days from know: Back to Becky and Joyce

          Cacturne: GAHHHH!

        2. Ana Chronistic

          rest of week: ALL FAZ

          all readers: WUT

        3. Someone

          What if it turned out that Faz was actually super nice (besides the perviness) and volunteered at the homeless shelter on weekends.

        4. Bagge

          That would be a great twist. Actually, I mostly feel sorry for him. He is raised by Blaine and clearly got some VERY toxic ideas about masculinity.

        5. Rutee

          I feel bad for him as is. He was raised by Blaine. But feeling bad for him isn’t the same as ‘not wanting the others to deal with him’ XD

        6. Someone

          Well, he seems to lack Blaines violence.

        7. LimeSheep

          if i didnt have way too much of my own comic to be drawing right now id draw a strip of faz taking care of an abandoned kitten

        8. LimeSheep

          ok im drawing it

        9. JustCheetoDust

          I don’t know, some people just aren’t cut out for volunteer work.

        10. Bagge

          The week after that: ALL FAZ NO PANTS.

          Readers: WHYYYYYYYYYYYYYYY

        11. Spencer

          We’ve been denied the Faz/Wen slipshine for far too long.

        12. Bagge

          It would be their snapshat log.

        13. thejeff

          I think you meant “spared the Faz/Wen slipshine”.

          OTOH, he does want people to pay for these things. It’s not all our tears or horror.

        14. Spencer

          It’d being held until Willis wants to get his solid gold lawn installed.

          Or for when he wants to cause the end of the universe, for the sheer unbridled eroticism will tear asunder the fabric of reality.

    2. LimeSheep

      we’re never going to see dina again

      1. Someone

        Willis: Finally I’m getting around to drawing Dina! *has heart attack*

  9. gkheyf

    soooooo…how many months in real-time until we see this resolved then?

    1. DinaWho

      Unsure. Buffer doesn’t go past the next in-comic day atm, I think, and that’s up through late April if not into May now.

      1. Stephen R. Bierce

        This storyline/day ends Feb 23rd. If he does devote a whole 50-strip storyline to Sunday, we won’t get to Monday till the start of June.

        1. Stephen R. Bierce

          Oops. May, not June.

        2. Lord Stoneheart

          Buffer is into May (There’s a Buffer Watch on the main page). And it’s in the next storyline “When God Closes the Door” which I’ll assume takes place on Saturday. (It seems unlikely that we’ll get a time skip).

          Monday may very well be in Book 7 territory. (Assuming we move forward one day at a time which seems likely I would guess?)

  10. CandidCanid

    Yay, emotional procrastination!

    …

    :’D

  11. Opus the Poet

    Two whole days? We won’t see that argument until September at least.

  12. Kernanator

    Hashtag relatable.

    (This is what the cool kids are doing these days right?)

    1. Doctor_Who

      http://i.imgur.com/q5rSbpg.png

  13. Leorale

    Also nice segue into the floor meeting. Although all the while I just want more fundie drama.

    1. Ctrl+C D@

      Don’t worry, floor meeting is just code for “Death Dome”.
      They gotta weed out the weak somehow.

      1. Doctor_Who

        So who’s going to ride on whose shoulders to imitate Master Blaster?

        …Sorry, I can’t seem to get Beyond Thunderdome.

        1. Ctrl+C D@

          Okay first, high five, secondly we both know that it’s gonna’ be Dina and Sarah recreating Master Blaster.
          Only real question is who gets to be Tina Turner?

        2. Doctor_Who

          Obviously Sal is the only one who can pull it off.

  14. JessWitt

    That’s the college way, Billie! Also figures Sal would be the pragmatic one of the two roommates.

  15. LimeSheep

    but where’s becky?

  16. Stephen R. Bierce

    *plays Loverboy’s “Working For The Weekend” on the hacked Muzak*

  17. Ctrl+C D@

    Two Days
    Welp, at least we know this arc will be finished in a month.

    1. Leorale

      read Willis’s comment above, and get comfy.

    2. Orion Fury

      Three months from now, it’ll be barely 24 hours later. So assume another three months to Sunday afternoon. That’s August, so maybe September for Monday? I’d say that Willis knows exactly when each hour of each day starts, but kids have a funny way of messing with time. When he plans on driving a knife thru our feels though, that’s probably chiseled in stone.

      1. Dana

        Wait, our feels are driven through like a knife chiseling plans into stone?

  18. MrInsecure

    Yes, Billie, this is a perfectly emotionally healthy way of dealing with your problems. Put it off until it’s an emergency and you have to jury-rig a solution, that’s how MacGyver would do it!

    1. Leorale

      Billie is pretty good at handling crises, and creating them.

      1. Clif

        Its like a super power.

    2. Doctor_Who

      Billie will construct a new dwelling for Becky using a piece of chewing gum, some twine, and the moderately priced apartment complex a few blocks away.

      1. Clif

        Nah, Becky will share a bed with Dina and all four of them will be room-mates.

    3. TamiDOA

      To be fair to Billie you have to remember she just had her crisis with Ruth a few minutes ago. She’s just relieved to have time to rest before the next round.

    4. ChrisHerself

      If it weren’t for the last minute I’d never get anything done.

  19. LimeSheep

    i like that sal is still concerned for her regarding ruth
    sal will be the last one to know the truth

  20. Just Me

    This it titled “Basket”, but I think Billie is heading towards being a ‘Basket Case’.

    So, Sal really didn’t know Billie and Ruth were an item? I kinda figured by now everyone on the floor knew.

    1. Ctrl+C D@

      Wouldn’t that just be hilarious? That this relationship that Mary, Ruth, and Billie think is a big secret is just common knowledge to everyone?
      “Yeah, we know you’re banging each other. We just kinda’ figured the whole campus shooting thing was more important than where you two stick your tongues at.”

      1. Captain Button

        “But Billie, you really shouldn’t be running around behind your boyfriend’s back like that.”

        1. Ctrl+C D@

          clap clap
          Well done.

  21. Edupoet81

    I need to work on overcoming my own tendency to procrastinate.

    Eh…. I’ll work on that later.

  22. Someone

    why do I hope that Mary turns out to be an awesome fighter, who can take on all the other major characters at once, leading to a dramatic battle?

    1. Ctrl+C D@

      Mudda mudda?

    2. TheLordMoccasin

      Deus vult

      1. Ctrl+C D@

        Whose fault?
        My fault?
        Yo’ fault?
        Ahhhh it’s nobodies fault!

    3. Ashley

      Because you are silly.

      1. Someone

        Sal tries to side kick her, Mary effortlessly blocks it with one arm and then sends Sal through a wall.

        1. Ashley

          Case in point.

        2. Someone

          Joyce: Becky, together!

          They both run at Mary, and after a short fight both manage to connect a single punch to Mary’s face, the Windows explode.

          Mary: impressive, but not impressive enough.

        3. Needfuldoer

          The entire month of June is just them panting and yelling from dozens of camera angles.

        4. Someone

          Mary: I promised you didn’t I, that I’d show you a nightmare beyond the horrors of hell. Over course I had hoped to include all of you, but from the look of things it seems Dina won’t be joing us, such a shame don’t you think.

          Dorothy: Yaaaah!

          Danny: C’mon you damn freak!

        5. Cephalo the Pod

          Mary: The First Abductee.

  23. caesaria82

    I have never related to Billie more in all the years this comic has existed.

  24. PrincessPoeDameron

    i, too, put off all of my problems until the last possible minute. it has yet to work for me.

    1. Clif

      Then you’re not putting them off long enough.

      1. Leorale

        If you put problems off long enough, they go away and you get different problems instead.

  25. miados

    pff thats future billies problem.

    1. Eukie

      Past Billie is a total asshole to Future Billie.

      1. miados

        future billie always says that about past billie, but past billie just has faith future billie can handle it.

      2. John

        Future Billie deserves it for having been such an asshole when she was Past Billie.

  26. Leorale

    It’s fine, Becky can crash with Dina. Amber will be thrilled to have a new person around, she is very healthy and sociable.

    1. TamiDOA

      No, Becky will move in with Leslie, causing Dina to get so depressed she forgets the entire Jurassic era.

    2. Captain Button

      If arm touching is First Base and meeting the parents is third, what is sharing a bed? Tenth Base?

      1. Ctrl+C D@

        Touchdown.
        Wait, that’s Handegg not Baseball.

        1. JustCheetoDust

          That’s the one with the hitting of a small white spheroid with a cudgel, right? I keep confusing that with the other pastime of athletic feats with similar rules…mixed martial arts?

        2. Dana

          Mixed martial arts is when you’re in bed with a knockout.

    3. cesium133

      Becky can crash with Dina, but that makes Amber uncomfortable, so she crashes with Danny, which means Joe needs somewhere outside the door he just attached a sock to, so he crashes with Penny, Roz, Sierra, and every other girl who would give him the time of day. Makes sense.

  27. Anywhere

    Billie’s response is exactly how every college student responds when the professor extends the deadline for an essay or report.

  28. OnyxIdol

    Ah, procrastination, the bane of my existence.

  29. Uniqueantique

    Well, this is good, Billie has a couple days to figure out her next move.

    I can’t WAIT for the floor meeting. I wonder if Ruth has called in any suits for this brouhaha that’s about to erupt all over the campus. Like maybe Leslie hope, hope (yeah I know, fat chance).

    Still, I do hope that Ruth got someone in for this: if this is where she’s going to remove Mary’s femurs, she needs authority present or -it’s just going to be just he said/she said. She needs witnesses.

    1. modulusshift

      From the previews, it seems Mary’s femurs will be fine until May 5th, most likely.

  30. Reltzik

    Really? Really? Here we are in higher education, and is this sort of irresponsible procrastinating behavior what people are learning there?

    1. Someone

      You don’t spend a lot of time around 18 year olds, do you Reltzik?

      1. Clif

        Or a good 90% of the population of any age.

      2. Shiro

        I think that may have been sarcasm

        1. Someone

          I’ve seen enough comments saying similar things without sarcasm that I’m never sure anymore.

        2. Dana

          Like this? Insensitive comment toward minority and/or vulerable group!

        3. inqntrol

          This is a great world we live in!

  31. random832

    Future Billie can deal with Future Billie’s problems, I guess.

    1. Clif

      Or you could take the optimistic view and assume that Joyce and Becky will have a fatal crash on the way back.

      1. Orion Fury

        I’m almost afraid to ask what the pessimistic view would be.

        Almost.

        1. fizzywafflezsuperstore

          They don’t.

  32. Peduncle

    We are getting very close to comment #1,000,000. Only about a hundred to go. (The numbering appears to have gaps, however.) Anyway, there should be a prize. A duck comes down and you win $10. So somebody write something inflammatory. Mary isn’t in today’s strip, but she’s always good for 300-500 comments. We can do it!

    1. Clif

      I feel your comment is insensitive to ducks and you should appologize to Mary at once.

      1. Orion Fury

        Exactly, associating ducks with Mary, how uncouth.

        1. Peduncle

          Now you know what Mary was up to at 3 pm.

          Duck you, Mary.

    2. Professor Fate

      “Say da secret woid …”

  33. Professor Fate

    Never put off tomorrow what you can put off today.

    I once joined the support group Procrastinators Anonymous, but there was never a meeting for some reason.

    1. Joey245

      I meant to join Procrastinators Anonymous, but I never got around to actually signing up.

      1. Bagge

        I went to the meeting and everyone thought I was an overachiever. They even talked about throwing me out but never got around to do so.

  34. Someone

    I’m going to be honest, I write pretty much every post expecting to be banned. Everyday, yep this is the one, this is where the joke goes just a bit too far.

    1. Someone

      And yes, that applies to this post as well

    2. Orion Fury

      And apparently the joke whizzed right past me without noticing it.

    3. trlkly

      Honestly not entirely sure how bans work with a system like this with no logins. Does he actually IP ban–that’s pretty harsh, as it would block you from reading the comic, too.

  35. Ashley

    And en when Becky gets back, it’s not like she has to acknowledge her presence. She can just act like there’s a ghost in her room! Any excuse is valid when you’re trying to postpone shittiness. Or responsibilities. Or facing the crushing reality of a new day.

  36. Bagge

    I like Billie’s upbeat, can-do-later attitude.

  37. Shiro

    I feel you, Billie. “You know whose problem this is? Future Shiro’s!”

  38. BenRG

    A problem postponed is not a problem resolved but it can feel just as good! So, Billie is planning on treasuring that good feeling for as long as she can!

    1. Random832

      You know what they say. Trouble delayed is trouble denied. Or something like that anyway.

  39. DarkoNeko

    So, Becky will most probably have a really shitty weekend, AND realise her place is “gone” once she come back (if she does). Uuuuh.

    1. DarkoNeko

      Sal’d channeling a lot of Sarah today, too. Wonder if it’s the letter commonality.

      1. begbert

        Sal + Sarah = Indy’s buddy.

    2. Cerberus

      She’ll roll with it, while screaming in the silence of her brain.

  40. nothri

    Come on Sal! Don’t tell me your one of those anti-crastinators!

  41. DaveM

    to quote Linus from Peanuts — ‘No problem is so big or so complicated that it can’t be run away from!’

    Of course that kind of thinking is pretty much how the whole mess started, but still..

  42. JA

    Not one, but TWO whole days!

  43. 3-I

    I want it noted that the number of times we’ve seen these two in their room at the same time is still under ten.

    1. Shiro

      So what you’re saying is there’s totally room for a third occupant

      1. John

        Sal only uses her bed in the daytime, and Billie half the time doesn’t use her bed at all (Ruth’s bed, Ruth’s closet, Walky’s bed, her chair, the hall floor…), so, yeah, I think Becky’s set.

  44. Jelli

    Just get an air mattress, Billie.

  45. TheLurkerAbove

    TWO WHOLE DAYS

    That’s two years of comic time, Billie has time. 😛

  46. trlkly

    Uh oh. If this will take months, that means the weekend will be really long for Dina. Because, for some reason, relationships seem to run on something closer to real time in this comic.

    (Not actually real time–just closer. I’d go to the wiki and do the math, but I’m tired. I’d say normal is that relationship time is 3 times faster. So, for example, Ruth and Billie’s 1 week relationship felt like 3 weeks. )

    1. trlkly

      Hope that made sense. I’m tired. But it’s basically just saying that relationships seem to longer in this comic than the in-comic time would indicate.

  47. Renee J

    Anybody else having trouble seeing today’s comic? Or is it just my phone?

    1. Captain Button

      Not just you, I couldn’t get on earlier. Better now, obviously.

  48. Alexx

    Oh man, I know that feeling! Billie’s comment was my entire school career. “This report isn’t due for a week? AWESOME! I don’t have to think about it for at least half a week! Or all of it.”

  49. a snow ʍousɐ

    “Two whole days! And that’s webcomic time, so just imagine how long that might be in real time!”

    1. BenRG

      Well, every chapter is usually a single day at IU, so I’m thinking maybe two or three months tops.

  50. Kirbilius Clausius

    Why doesn’t Billie, a self-proclaimed emergency responder & ex-cheer leader socialite, just tell Ruth to strike at Mary after cleansing her room of Becky now? Mary’s counter of “But Becky!” would be ‘proven’ fantasy & ‘Billie’s sleeping with you’ would get the resounding “So?” when everyone else laughs at the idea?

    1. Spencer

      It’s not the dorm Ruth and Billie need to worry about figuring them out, it’s Ruth’s bosses.

  51. Peduncle

    We have a winner. I think. modulusshift posted comment #1,000,008. I couldn’t find any comments with lower numbers that were at least a million. Here’s the link. Congratulations, modulusshift, here’s your ten bucks.

    1. Random832

      How’d you find it? Maybe 1,000,000 was posted on a different comic.

      1. Peduncle

        I searched the HTML source for “comment-100000”. 1000008 was the only hit.

        It’s possible that 1,000,000 through 1,000,007 were posted on a different comic entirely. What were those people thinking?

  52. Peduncle

    *foreseeable* (How many English words are there with -eea-?)

    1. David M Willis

      agreeable
      disagreeable
      …seeable
      ……unseeable….
      …………….unforeseeable…

      1. Peduncle

        You win! (Duck descends with your prize.)

        1. a snow ʍousɐ

          What about “weeaboo”? A nonsense word introduced by a webcomic and then shoehorned into a definition within a particular subculture! Hooray for the age of the internet!

        2. Peduncle

          Okay, I’m sure we have something special for you. (Rummages in prize drawer.) Watch out for the duck!

        3. Peduncle

          Google shows “freeaboo” also. Gadzooks!

  53. Hotsauce

    Billie treats relationships like I treated papers I had to write. It always worked out well for me, so I’m sure she’ll be fine.

    1. Bleeters

      If I can do it tommorrow, I won’t do it today!

  54. gog

    panel 5: when did Sal become Mike??

  55. Dean

    If shittiness is postponed for more than two days, please consult your doctor.

  56. trlkly

    I’m not even so sure it’s all that irresponsible. The only thing I can think of that Billie could do is call Joyce while Joyce is probably going through some shit, and then lay more shit on Becky over the phone instead of in person.

    Sure, she could be thinking about where else to put Becky, but it’s not like she can’t just stay with Billie or go back with Joyce for a few days until she gets that worked out. And, frankly, Billie needs at least a day off right now after a breakup.

    (Well, unless Ruth plans her attack on Mary for Monday or Tuesday. But Billie has no way of knowing that right now.)

    1. thejeff

      Becky (and Joyce) do need to be warned, not just or even mostly about the sleeping arrangements, but about Mary’s threats. And Ruth needs to know, for tactical reasons, that Becky isn’t around for the weekend.

      Communicate, people. It lets you screw over the bad guys better. Do it out of spite, if nothing else.
      It’s a moral imperative.

  57. Just Me

    There is going to be a meeting about the Toedad incident. I bet that is where Ruth lays some smack-down on Mary and they figure out what to do about Becky.

    1. Spencer

      I kind of doubt Ruth is going to give Mary a legitimate reason to report her.

      Though we’re doubtlessly going to see some smug Mary at the meeting.

  58. evan

    I dunno. Billie’s good for what, six months?

  59. Yotomoe

    http://i.imgur.com/UUSS4rD.png

    1. Bagge

      That sums it up nicely.

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