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Wakey wakey
Posted on February 24, 2016 by David M Willis

322 thoughts on “Wakey wakey”

  1. Ana Chronistic

    dang I get phantom wake-up calls, too, but none THAT scary

    1. Ana Chronistic

      I’m guessing the meal call is “WINNER WINNER CHICKEN DINNER”

      1. Diana

        For some reason I read that as “wiener wiener chicken dinner”. I was a little disappointed when I re-read it.

        1. Vagabond J

          weiner weiner chicken peener?

        2. Stephen R. Bierce

          “Permission to say Cock?”

        3. Vagabond J

          Well, if you want to be blunt about it…

        4. Doomprix

          weiner weiner, edward weiner?

        5. J

          How about a Weinersmith?

        6. Kaida

          High five for the TG reference!

        7. Vinny

          wiener wiener Dorothy Keener

        8. Betty Anne

          I did the same thing. It has to be a combo of the late hour and the caps lock. ^^;

      2. Yet_One_More_Idiot

        I thought the breakfast call was “Wakey wakey, eggs ‘n bakey!”, and the dinner call was “Winner winner, chicken dinner!”.

        After all, chicken isn’t really something one would usually have for breakfast, is it? 😛

        But seriously Sarah, you’ve got phantom-Joycey right in your FAAAAAAAAAACE. And in your head too. 😀 Also I get phantom wake-up calls a lot of the time (phantom knocking on the door though, typically), it can be really disturbing if you wake up super-abruptly because of it.

        1. Unerringly Errant

          Yeah, that’s the one I’m familiar with too… And good lord is it annoying, especially if you’ve only slept 4 hours or so.

        2. thejeff

          It had damn well better come with the smell of bacon. That’s about the only thing that makes it tolerable. And coffee, if you like that kind of thing.

        3. Yet_One_More_Idiot

          It’s not as annoying as wake-up calls on Scout camps. If you’re lucky, you get something like a frying pan being banged loudly. When I went to Canada with the Scouts, we had to put up with the neighbouring American troop getting woken up by bugle call each morning, which was much more annoying.

          Or if you’re incredibly unlucky, you’d get woken up with a bucket of water to your faaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaace. xD (But srsly, you would)

        4. leadsynth

          Right? I’ve heard “Eggs n’ bakey”…but this “Chicken bakey” thing seems all wrong. Is this an actual thing people say, or a weird Joyce thing? I want answers from Willis!

    2. bodmans

      that grav… should I be worried?
      Oh wait, nevermind.

      Let me prepare my ”Damn you Willis” in advance

  2. Wolf

    Sarah, you’re hallucinating again.

    1. Darth

      Now look who’s on drugs!

      1. Wolf

        You think I’M on drugs? Amazi-Girl is my girlfriend. She’d never let me take the darn things! Then again, she did let me steal those goats….

      2. TheNinthShader

        I’m on drugs 😀

        1. Schol-R-LEA

          I AM drugs!

    2. Wolf

      My buddy Dallas is a physician. He can recommend you some medicine for those if you want.

      UNLESS YOU DON’T WANT TO CHANGE…

      1. Dallas

        Leave me out of this.

    3. trlkly

      Isn’t it weird how casually we take our nightly hallucinations?

      1. Dana

        The one that gets me is how if we’re not unconscious for large amounts of time for long enough we lose our ability to thermoregulate and we die.

      2. TheNinthShader

        ¨I’m going to go into an exhaustion induced coma for 8 hours, all the while vividly hallucinating.¨
        ¨You mean a nap?¨
        ¨Yeah.¨

        1. Silly Name

          *highfive for the XKCD reference*

        2. Znayx

          Definitely!

          High five threesome! (high… fivesome? Wait, that sounds like an orgy on drugs. Nevermind)

        3. Wolf

          We’re not gonna lie. That IS an orgy on drugs.

  3. Tabitha Desanto

    She is in your head not in your face

    1. lejwocky

      I ain’t happy, I’m feeling glad…

      1. Chandra

        Do you also have sunshine in a bag?

        1. Itama

          well that’d be worthless.
          but not for long…

        2. Karatesaul

          Her future is comin’ on.

        3. Schol-R-LEA

          Naah, no super-soldiers in this series, that was the old one.

        4. Uniqueantique

          Nice Glass Scientist Dr. Jeykel.

    2. a4lbi

      faaaaaaaace

      1. Lia47

        +1 for face

  4. Spencer

    “Sarah, Joyce died in the accident six months ago. You need to move on.”

    1. gkheyf

      played by bruce willis…wearing blue contacts

      also, great comment. m. night shambalaya would be proud

      1. Mr k

        It just needs shitty acting to be even better.

    2. Sarah

      First of all, awesome gravitar, Sans is cool
      Second, Sarah didn’t know Joyce six months ago, did she randomly meet her ghost?

      1. Doctor_Who

        And when she pulled up the the house, she looked in the back seat and the hitchhiker was GONE.

        1. TamiDOA

          Was there a bloody hook on the door handle?

        2. Opus the Poet

          Nope, just a puddle of lake water in the back seat.

        3. Silly Name

          But then… WHO WAS PHONE?

        4. Lone Wolf

          http://i.imgur.com/VUPmTJY.jpg

        5. Dean

          THE DREAM IS COMING FROM INSIDE THE HOUSE!

        6. gkheyf

          i am so confused now that my understanding of this comic has turned into a cup of chamomile tea

        7. Captain Button

          Oh no, not again.

        8. Bicycle Bill

          …and my sweater lying on her grave.

    3. Lia47

      “Sarah? what were you doing at the old IU campus? that school hasnt been open in 50 years!”

      1. Reltzik

        “…. oh, right. Thank goodness for the longevity treatments, though, I’d have freaked out twice if I’d woken up old and gray.”

        1. Screwball

          “Sarah, you ARE old & grey! There’s no such thing as longevity treatments. You’re hallucinating. Again. We know you didn’t mean to do it, but you still need help. Now, let’s put down the knife, & get you back to the hospital before you hurt anyone else, OK…”

          “…Where did she get it from anyway? The cops back then checked everywhere. Least now we can check it against the-”

          “JOHNSON! Not. Another. Word. We don’t want to set her off again…”

    4. biocuriousgeorgie

      Twist! It’s actually Sarah that’s the ghost!

      1. Palamdrone

        https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=im9XuJJXylw

        1. Ana Chronistic

          the tragic double Shyamalan

  5. Kernanator

    Joyce has activated her latent psychic powers!

    1. inqntrol

      To torment her roommate with her Triangle Smile!

      1. Reltzik

        …. wait, that’s latent?

        1. Screwball

          The long-range Astro-Projection part is…

    2. Captain Button

      The Mutant Menace Revealed! Sentinels, Immediate Launch!

  6. Doctor_Who

    Having voices in your head is rarely a good sign.

    Having Joyces in your head is probably even worse.

    1. inqntrol

      Remember Joan d’Arc? Didn’t end well for her.

      1. Adept Arcanist

        I dunno. On one hand she /did/ get burned at the stake for it, but on the other hand she helped end a hundred-year-long war in her country’s favor… I can see there being people who would regard that as a fair trade.

        1. Silly Name

          AND she’s now super-famous! That’s every teenage girl’s dream!

          (Hey, be thankful I didn’t make any “she’s hot” jokes)

        2. Willoughby Chase

          I take French Fries with that, thanks.

    2. Emperor Norton

      I hear voices in my head. They counsel me, they understand, they talk to me. And I am as sane as the next person.

  7. Cephalo the Pod

    Inter-universal plot twist; Anti-Joyce is inside of Sarah.

    1. Spencer

      Anti-Joyce would probably be up to that.

    2. Yossarianduck

      I think you’re confusing Anti Joyce with Other Jacob.

      1. TamiDOA

        Aren’t they the same?

        1. Screwball

          Naaa, Anti-Joyce would just possess Sarah’s mind & at least 1 arm, THEN Other-Jacob comes into it…

        2. TamiDOA

          Ah, so it’s a gatekeeper + keymaster arrangement. Ghosts ARE involved. Who ya gonna call?

        3. Screwball

          Ghost Nappa-sorry, Busters…? 😛

  8. Mr. Mendo

    Sarah’s grown accustomed to her face…

    1. Estron

      She almost makes the day begin . . .

      1. EvilWriter

        She’s grown accustomed to the tune she whistles night and noon…

        “DRAW ME NEARER! WOH HOLY SPIRIT! FILL ME UUUUUUUUUUUUP WITH YOUR POOOOOOOOOOOWER!”

        1. StClair

          Her smiles, her frowns,
          Her ups, her downs,
          Are second nature to her now
          Like breathing out, breathing in…

        2. Leorale

          Man, I got SO ANGRY at that musical as a kid, because I hated the ending. ‘Enry ‘Iggans was a jerk, and Eliza had a cute admirer named Freddy who was excited about her, and she had outlined a delightful revenge fantasy with ‘just you wait’, but noooo, instead she loves H.H. with an indulgent smile as he totally fails to apologize. Displeased eight-year-old!

        3. Leorale

          ….that said,
          I was serenely independent and content before we met
          Surely I could always be that way again and yet
          I’ve grown accustomed to her looks
          Accustomed to her voice
          Accustomed to her

        4. Disloyal Subject

          I’m still firmly of the opinion that her friendship with Higgins was platonic, but important enough to her that she was unwilling to abandon it. Hopefully Freddy could accept that; he seemed like a pretty cool guy.

        5. StClair

          (A common thread of most “great” and “classic” fictional romances, and even many recent rom-coms, is that the party presented as the superior/”perfect” match is, when viewed by modern eyes, a massive tool somewhat lacking.)

        6. Mr. Mendo

          Well, “makes sense on paper” isn’t exactly the stuff that great love stories are made out of. 😉

        7. Leorale

          True, but neither is “eh, I’m used to her”.
          (Yes I know he liked her and just couldn’t admit it, but I’m also no fan of a person who can’t admit their feelings.)

        8. Abel Undercity

          In George Bernard Shaw’s original play, Pygmalion, Eliza does end up with Freddy. The makers of My Fair Lady changed the ending.

        9. hof1991

          In Shaw’s original play, Eliza walks out the door at the end. She leave Higgins flat and goes on to a new life. They changed the ending on the second night without asking him. He was furious.

        10. StClair

          Rightly so, IMO.

        11. Leorale

          Yeah, wow, not only is it a worse ending, but you just don’t do that to a playwright!
          I am also shocked that I left a perfect opening for “faaaaace” buy nobody took it. (Almost as shocked as I am to find gambling in this nearby, tangentially-related establishment.)

        12. No Name

          Your winnings, Leorale.

        13. Emperor Norton

          Is that a real psalm/hymn/Christian song? Because it seems awfully… euphemistic.

  9. Nicster216

    Hmm looks like sarah has grown attached to Joyce. Then again if someone woke me up early everyday it would be really hard to not t imagine them doing it. LOOKING AT YOU MOM????

    1. TheGrammarLegionary

      Oh God I thought that was just me… Months after I moved out. So weird.

      1. Sunny

        It’s good to know I’m not alone in this.

    2. Doctor_Who

      I’m so used to my cat waking me up at 6 am to be fed that I keep waking up then even when I’m out of town.

      1. Ophidiophile

        …And they said you couldn’t be trained.

  10. Schpoonman

    Hey. I’m not saying it’s the alcohol, but I don’t think you could break my heart anymore than you did just now.

  11. Dara

    No, she wasn’t a ghost all along, she’s just been a ghost since doing that the first time.

    oh wait, that’s if she was my roommate

    1. Larkle

      Haha…yeah, that is not acceptable. Sleep is sacred.

      1. Dara

        i am awake but at what cost club reporting for zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz

  12. Darchias

    Been there. I didn’t have an alarm clock during my first deployment to Iraq, but I had my laptop. I used it to play a song to wake me up, the same song every morning. For a month afterwards I would hear that song as I woke up.

    1. Doctor_Who

      “I’ve got you babe…”

    2. Betty Anne

      “Okay, campers, rise and shine, and don’t forget your booties ’cause it’s cooooold out there today.”

      1. TamiDOA

        At one very tedious place I worked, I had a Feb. 2, 1993 calender page on the wall for years. No one ever got the joke. Dull places make for dull minds.

        1. Betty Anne

          LOL! Every time the weather person on the radio mentions that it’s cold today while I’m driving, I still interrupt him with, “It’s cold out there every day…” XD

    3. Disloyal Subject

      “Please allow me to introduce myself,
      I’m a man of wealth amd taste…”

    4. Tenchan

      “Come on, come on, come on, come on, now touch me baby! Can’t you see that I am not afraid!”

  13. brumagem

    Sarah were you wearing lipstick when you went to bed or are you just that quick to get it on

    1. Doctor_Who

      Looks like she has some on her teeth in panel 4, so I’d say she forgot to remove it before bed.

      She’s lucky if her pillow doesn’t have a big clown grin on it, since it looks like she sleeps face down.

      1. Wolf

        Did somebody say Clown?

        1. Emperor Norton

          They have to say it three times before you’re summoned. So back to the realm of happy fun-times for now, Wolf.

  14. Dalrint

    Well, that’s it, she’s crazy.

  15. Cephalo the Pod

    Joyce is really adorable in this strip.

  16. Jay Eff

    *reads Alt Text*

    DOA Episode 1: The Phantom Joyce
    Featuring Jar-Jar Faz!

    1. Doctor_Who

      That’s either the one thing that could make Jar Jar worse, or the one thing that could save him, and I’m honestly not sure which.

      1. Rukduk

        Maybe meesa can help yousa decide.

        1. Disloyal Subject

          PURGE THE ALIEN.
          I don’t mind Jar-Jar, but combining him with Faz, while hilarious, is heresy of the highest order.

        2. Gamaran Sepudomyn

          Faz with possible force powers (a la the Sith Jar Jar theory) would be pretty terrifying.

    2. podian

      Imagine Jar-Jar with this constant smug smile of Faz…

    3. Deanatay

      “Meesa thinks yousa attracted to Jar Jar. Meesa has chart showing yousa how much OOF!” *falls down stairs, breaks neck*

      Actually, now I like this version of Faz.

  17. Badgermole

    Whose picture is on the wall in Joyce’s study space? I need to know.

    1. vonniesaur

      Why does Joyce’s desk have cupboards where it should have an empty space under the desk? She must bump her knees a lot.

      1. Betty Anne

        Their under bed setups are mirror images of each other. Her desk is under the other end of her bed. Sarah’s cupboards have their back to the shared space between her bed and Joyce’s bed.

        1. vonniesaur

          Oh god thanks for telling me

    2. Bicycle Bill

      I’d be more interested in knowing about where Joyce and Sarah have gone with the desk chairs.

  18. Just Me

    That must have been one heck of a Nightmare, Sarah.

  19. VizardJeffhog

    Garfield Without Garfield – Dumbing of Age edition!

  20. tim gueguen

    Joyce used her psychic powers to wake Sarah. The psychic powers she pretends she doesn’t have, because her pastor would think she was demon possessed if she talked about them.

    1. insomniac

      THEY’RE ALL GONNA LAUGH AT YOU!

    2. Void

      We don’t talk about that after the incident with the pig blood at the prom.

      1. Falling Star

        She hid from the teenage witches and they couldn’t use her for sacrifices?

  21. JessWitt

    Joyce:me::Sarah:my sister.

    She is just awful at waking up for classes.

    1. Opus the Poet

      I think you meant Joyce:Sarah::me:my sister, reads as Joyce is to Sarah as me to my sister.

      1. JessWitt

        Crap, you’re right. I have failed Englizh.

        1. Needfuldoer

          Unpossible!

      2. No Name

        Actually, they both work. It just depends on how you work the analogy. JessWitt’s analogy focuses on the similarities between the parties, saying that Joyce is like JessWitt in the way Sarah is like JessWitt’s sister. Yours, meanwhile, states that Joyce’s relationship to Sarah is like JessWitt’s relationship to their sister. Both analogies are valid and equivalent.

  22. altalemur

    joyce reminds me of my cat.

    1. Smiling Cat

      It’s not just me!

    2. ChrisHerself

      WAKEY WAKEY GIVE ME CHICKEN

    3. Disloyal Subject

      I’m too heavy a sleeper to be woken until she draws blood, so instead she’s learned to wake up my roommate and get them to wake me up for her.
      It’s a needlessly complicated process, but it works.

      1. Someone

        Just be glad your cat hasn’t decided the better option is to draw blood to wake you up.

        1. Disloyal Subject

          I’m honestly surprised she hasn’t. Not terribly glad, though; what few scars she’s given me look great.

  23. Guairdean

    That’s some serious PTSD. She should get counseling.

    1. Sambo

      More like Post-Traumatic Joyce Disorder

      1. Guairdean Beatha

        That would make an interesting Masters (and possibly Doctoral) thesis.

  24. Smiling Cat

    I used to do a fair bit of cat sitting for a friend. Well after I got home from one of these trips, I’d wake up several times a night to what I was sure were the sounds of a twenty six pound cat hammering on the door trying to either get in or out.

    1. Smiling Cat

      Though I suppose this is actually closer to the cat who would respond to my occasional bouts of sleep paralysis by climbing up on my chest and staring directly into my soul.

    2. Disloyal Subject

      Leaving one’s friendly pet boa with someone after days of serving as an impromptu jungle gym has a similar effect – you can feel her slithering over your skin, but she’s not there.

      1. Captain Button

        It’s too late to say you’re sorry.

  25. RJ

    Damn, damn, damn! I’ve grown accustomed to her face!

  26. caesaria82

    I feel you, Sarah, I see the Triangle Smile of Doom in my nightmares as well.

  27. Plasma Mongoose

    Oh great, Joyce is the new Freddy Kruger.

    1. inqntrol

      So who’s Jason then? Really want to see a Freddy VS Jason fight.

      1. EvilMidnightLurker

        Ruth. She wasn’t joking about the femurs.

      2. Reltzik

        Jason is…. Jason. It is the duty of the calculus TA to slay the dreams of their students.

        1. Bagge

          Jason: “You got to be kidding me. This wasn’t in the syllabus.”
          Penny: “No complaining, you wanted to be less of a shit teacher. Now is you chance.”

      3. Void

        Tis obviously Mike.

  28. Luzahn

    Of course, we should have seen it all along! Sarah’s the only one who’s ever interacted with Joyce directly! She was never real!

    OOoooOoOOoooOoo

  29. vonniesaur

    This looks like that sleep phenomena when you’re trying to fall asleep and suddenly a light switches on and Joyce is yelling in your ear, only for a split second and then it stops.

    1. Cephalo the Pod

      Because you’ve had trouble getting to sleep so you’ve been up for hours and you’ve reached the point of absolute exhaustion but it’s almost time to get up so you don’t really feel like it but you occasionally nod off and suddenly there’s his loud buzzing all around you and that wakes you back up?

  30. brionl

    I’ve never had phantom wakeups, but I had to move my clock radio so my cat couldn’t push the buttons and set it off at 4AM.

  31. Lucretiel

    I think that’s the most Joyce face in the history of the archive.

  32. newllend(henryvolt)

    Wait so has he gotten so used to her being there that she’s hallucinating her being there…. that’s kind of odd.

  33. Alice Macher

    Then Sarah says to her family and friends (paraphrasing the final installment of The Far Side):

    “And Aunt Zelda all the nice fundies looked like you, and all the mean fundies looked like Great-Granpa and Great-Granma, and Ernie all the goofy men-children looked like you, and there were casanovas like you Billy, and there were lesbians and masked vigilantes and some of it was annoying and some of it was shooty… and… and… and… Oh, wow! There’s no place like home!”

    1. Silly Name

      Isn’t that from “The Wizard of Oz”?

      1. Alice Macher

        That’s what the final Far Side was riffing on, yes. But the “All the ____ looked just like you” wasn’t in the movie; that was the comic strip.

  34. Chengrel

    I’m not sure if this is more creepy or sad.

    Poor Sarah. I bet she’s starting to miss Joyce’s constant cheerfulness.

    1. Captain Button

      Withdrawal symptoms.

      Joyce

      Not even once

  35. Reltzik

    TFW you realize you have unconsciously succumbed to your fundamentalist roommate’s branwashing/conditioning.

    1. Bagge

      “WAKEY WAKEY, LET’S TALK ABOUT JESUS’ LOVE!!!”

    2. Drakey

      We have to make sure we get all this bran clean before we make the cereal!

  36. Yotomoe

    Sarah then walks over to the window to look upon the wasteland that was once a campus. She turned to her Roommate, shooing the bugs out of her corpse and props her up out of bed.
    Dumbing of Apocalypse.

    1. Spencer

      Dumbing of Last of Us, wherein Danny gets eaten by a mushroom zombie.

      Also it doesn’t suck ass.

    2. Someone

      Its sad that despite all these wonderful ideas, there still is nothing labeled Dumbing of Age, at Fanfic.net

      1. Spencer

        The characters are boffing all the time so that kills fanfic’s primary niche.

        1. Someone

          I offer 1 million internet cookies, to the person who can give me the best Dumbing of Age/Walkyverse (extra points for cross overs) fan fic!

          Extra points if its grammatically correct.

          Also, if some writes something great, I might give them a sketch at their request. (subject to how much time I have, may be a few days)

        2. Someone

          Also, link to it here, doesn’t matter where written as long as it works.

          Seriously I would be surprised if anyone actually did this though.

        3. Drakey

          Merry Christmas:

          http://archiveofourown.org/tags/Dumbing%20of%20Age/works

        4. Someone

          Wooooooo!

        5. Void

          I don’t have a fanfiction site account that said I wanted to write something. It’s short and I’m ashamed I hope you’re happy.

          Mike was walking along one day thinking of all the horrible things he would do to people. Then out of the blue, a portal opened above him. Someone fell on him. He was staring himself in the face! He asked the other mike “Who the fuck are you?” The other mike replied “I’m the guy who did your mom for a nickel. Where am I?”. “Right outside Indiana University” Mike responded as he punched other!mike in the face to get other!Mike off of him. “Nice punch. I wouldn’t expect anything less from me,” other!Mike said as he slapped Mike’s ass. “Hey, I thought we were straight.” Mike said in response. other!mike pulled him closer with a strength much greater than Mike could ever hope to muster, and said: “I’m whatever you don’t want me to be, baby.”

          Well that’s the end of this disaster of a fic. In case you couldn’t tell other!Mike is walkyverse Mike. I will go hang my head in shame now.

        6. Leorale

          I laughed, I cried, I questioned all the life choices that brought us to this point. A+ fanfic.

        7. Someone

          And than they all kissed and got a super pregnant, the end.

        8. Bagge

          Well, there is always angst…. oh wait

  37. EvilMidnightLurker

    I kept having dreams about needing to go through one more semester of college YEARS after actually graduating.

    1. Betty Anne

      I think this is probably every college grad’s experience. 😐 That, and the one where you realize you didn’t attend class for an entire semester and now you have to make up an entire semester’s worth of work in one week because it’s too late to drop it and the failing grade will cost you your student aid. XP Bonus points if it’s a class you never had to take and know you would hate, like stupid-advanced math when you were a non-math major. XP

    2. Michelle J. Caboose

      Eh… I’m in my mid-40’s and still occasionally have these weird dreams where, because of some technicality in the the educational system, I have to go back to elementary school. I mean, cripes! I graduated high school in 1986, for Pete’s sake! :/

  38. Peduncle

    Have we seen this full a view of the room before?

    I went looking for one in hardcopy Book 1. Didn’t find it, but beneath the strip with the photo of Joyce and Becky with the roller coaster in the background, Mr. Willis wrote that it was at Indiana Beach (not Six Flags, unless that’s at Indiana Beach). That’s in reference to yesterday’s strip.

  39. nothri

    Sarah has grown accustomed to her FAAAAAAAACE.

    1. inqntrol

      If Sal had this hallucination she surely would have tried to strangle it.

      1. nothri

        Which, considering Billie is back in her room, would not have ended well.

  40. Professor Fate

    Never eat a shredded beef, nacho cheese, jalapeno, black bean and egg casserole before bed, Sarah. Not only will you have nightmares, you might well shit the bed. 😀

  41. Rob

    fuck now im sad

  42. Palamdrone

    Who’s in Joyce’s bed?

    1. Leorale

      Nobody. It’s empty, she just didn’t make the bed before she left.

      1. Palamdrone

        Then why is the blanket elevated where a person’s head should be? Is it so dirty than its stuck conformed to her shape like that? That’s what Walky’s blanket might do, not Joyce…

        1. Reltzik

          There’s a pillow and a million plushies under there.

        2. Bagge

          I don’t think we’ve ever seen those million plushies.

          Since I don’t wish Willis any harm I’m OK with him not drawing them for us every time we see Joyce’s and Sarah’s room.

        3. Bicycle Bill

          But there was definitely a reference to them.

        4. Emperor Norton

          Besides, you can’t wish more harm on him than he does on himself:

          https://twitter.com/damnyouwillis/status/702268918317113347

        5. nothri

          Witchcraft.

    2. Jason

      I’ll bet you anything it’s Billie…because Dina’s sleeping in her bed (the one Becky was crashing in).

      Not really. But maybe.

    3. ChrisHerself

      Bear. Bear is in Joyce’s bed.

      1. Palamdrone

        Her bed is just right?

  43. BakerMikeRomeo

    I have felt a great disturbance in my sleep, as if a thousand friggin’ chipper morning people cried out at once, and were never silenced.

  44. Stephen R. Bierce

    *plays Cliff Richard’s “Dreamin'” on the hacked Muzak*

    1. neeks

      *puts in a request for joni mitchell’s “big yellow taxi” to play next*

      1. Knightsky

        After Neeks gets their song, plays “Voices” by Russ Ballard.

        1. Stephen R. Bierce

          Good choices.

  45. EvilWriter

    D’awww, Sarah misses Joyce so much she’s gone insane. I sense a crack ship with Yandere Sarah!

  46. miados

    she is so used to it she dreams it!

    you miss her

    (teasing tone) you love her

    1. Dana

      Joyce and Sarah are going to get maaarieeed and they they’ll find Jeeeesuuuus!

      1. Adj

        I always find the phrase “Find Jesus” to be a little weird. LIke he’s a lost set of keys or something.

        “I found Jesus and a twenty dollar bill in an old pair of jeans! Woot!”

        1. thejeff

          Friend of mine used to have a bumper sticker that read:

          “I’ve found Him! I have Jesus in the trunk.”

        2. Captain Button

          Principia Discordia is subtitled “How I found Goddess and what I did to her when I found her.”

        3. thejeff

          Wherein is Explained Absolutely Everything Worth Knowing About Absolutely Anything
          Greater Poop: Is Eris true?
          Malaclypse the Younger: Everything is true.
          GP: Even false things?
          M2: Even false things are true.
          GP: How can that be?
          M2: I don’t know man, I didn’t do it.

  47. Shiro

    Awwwww, Sarah misses her

    She just can’t stop having a heart

    1. inqntrol

      “Damn you emotions!”

      1. Shiro

        *punches heart til the emotions stop happening*

  48. Saaaam

    And now Sarah is having hallucinations. Is the twist of Dumbing of Age gonna be that this is Indiana State Mental Hospital?

    1. Disloyal Subject

      April is still a couple months off.

    2. HMRC4EVR

      DoA will end with a little Walky playing with a snowglobe with the University inside.

      1. Captain Button

        With that avatar I’d expect an ending like The Big O*.

        (Supposed to start at 3:40 in, but youtube is funny about that.)

        * Link SFW, it isn’t that kind of Big O.

  49. Palamdrone

    Truly this is the stuff of nightmares. Finally getting the peace and freedom to sleep as late as you want, but your own traumatic memories wake you.

    1. StClair

      “That’s not fair. That’s not fair at all. There was TIME now, there was all the time I needed…”

  50. Rukduk

    Awww. This is so nice. Sarah misses Joyce. That, or it’s concerning that she’s hearing voices.

  51. trlkly

    So Joyce has been waking her up so many times that she dreams about it now. And probably set her internal clock to wake her up.

    Maybe Joyce had a bit of a mischievous streak. I know that, the first time I saw that my roommate didn’t like it, I’d’ve stopped.

    1. Reltzik

      Or barring that after Sal went full breath-play in response.

  52. Bagge

    Depicted: Sarah not missing or worrying about Joyce.

  53. NinjaNick

    Cute Joyce, even though she’s really not here.

  54. Dana

    Okie dokie artichokey!

  55. Bicycle Bill

    Before she left, Joyce changed the ringtone on Sarah’s phone?

  56. Ashley

    The sads. 🙁 I feels it.

  57. John Madden

    Then who was wakeup?

    1. Needfuldoer

      Oh my god bear was wakeup! How can this be?!

  58. Arianod

    OMG the hallucinations! Sarah’s suffering from Joyce withdrawal already!!!

  59. Peny

    Joyce has the magical power of absorbing sleep from any living being, no matter how far the distance.

  60. 6Qubed

    joyce was played by bruce willis the whole time

    dude has range

  61. insomniac

    Dammit, get back here so I can hate having you here again.

  62. pjeseb

    I don’t know if it’s only because I’ve been playing a lot of Arkham Knight recently, but this was a little creepy.

  63. Iceholder

    Does Joyce’s face look like the face of mercy to you m8

    1. Disloyal Subject

      Next on Joyce’s punching queue: Kyubey.

  64. Bagge

    Chicken Bakey?

    1. Edward Starsmith

      Tender Flakey.

  65. Adam Black

    This happened to me today.
    I dreamed I rented a room in a place with no ceiling, so you could alway see the sky .
    Downside I got attacked by animal while sleeping.
    ( yeah I even dream I sleep. Im that lazy. )

    Then i wake up Shocked and Screaming ….only to find oddly, that the Cat didnt pounce me in my sleep…?
    ( or he was just damn fast ) . It was spooky.

  66. Benjy

    Aww, she misses her little sis.

  67. deviantgreed

    That would freak me right the fuck out. If I woke up to something like that in my dorm.

  68. Miles

    Don’t care what anyone says ghost Joyce is cannon now.

    1. Falling Star

      I’m gonna have to draw that.

  69. Captain Button

    Damnit Joyce, our roommate agreement explicitly forbids astral projection into or out of the room!

  70. BenRG

    (Sing-Song) Someone’s missing her Joycey! I love it! Sarah is so used to Joyce’s perpetual sunny ways that, even if she isn’t there, her subconscious edits her in!

  71. Disloyal Subject

    I’m surprised Joyce’s bed isn’t made, but she was stressing a lot over this trip, and maybe she’s the sort to make her bed just before going to sleep.

    1. Leorale

      Plus Hank arrived early, and they had to toss their clothes together and get outta there.

      1. Disloyal Subject

        Sure, but for some reason I was assuming she usually makes her bed right after getting up.

        1. Emperor Norton

          From “the lost strips ‘archive’ that only exists in my head”:

          Day 3. Joyce admonishes Sarah for not making her bed. Sarah reminds Joyce that nobody gives a fuck about whether or not you make your bed in a college campus.

          Zoom in on Joyce’s face as she realises it: “This. Changes. Everything.”

        2. Captain Button

          The first tiny step down the Road To Hell.

  72. Sabrina

    Dat Sketchup? (regardless if it is or not, super dig that long last panel)

  73. DaveM

    And Sarah now realises she’s fallen in love with (or at least has non-violent feelings about) Joyce. Cue Becky & Joyce coming back leading to the most awkward threesome ever. 🙂

    Personally, I blame Billie & Ruth. With those two split up, there’s no longer and outlet for all the sexual tension, leading to things like this happening all over the dorm. Hang on, they broke up because of Mary (well not totally, but mostly), so it’s all Mary’s fault! (And suddenly the universe makes sense again) 🙂

    On a less silly note, it’s interesting that Sarah dreams of happy Joyce, rather than the more recent Joyce. Maybe she misses the optimistic and obliviously cheerful persona (before real life broke it) more than she knows?

    1. Commodore Jeep-Eep

      Oh god, what happens when that tension gets to Mary?

      1. Emperor Norton

        Somebody will secretly leave a dildo in the shape of Jesus Christ in Mary’s bed.

        1. de Combys

          Why does that make me laugh?

  74. Phyrexian Rogue

    Joyce is a ghost.
    Joyce is autobiographical.
    Willis is a ghost.

    This explains so much.

    1. Screwball

      In order to remain in this world, with the ability to interact with it, he must feed off the distress of others. Every “Damn you Willis” is like an icecream sundae to him…

    2. Willoughby Chase

      He’s a Ghost Writer. In the Sky.

  75. Screwball

    Hey, is anyone else having problems with Dumbing Of Age’s page? I keep getting “Unresponsive script” messages. Reinstalled Firefox to make sure it wasn’t me, but it’s still happening…

    I don’t know if Mr David Willis knows about it, so Hopefully if I leave this here, he’ll find it & maybe find the problem. I seem to have a video add or something like that trying to load up under the right of the comic, I think that might be the cause, but I can’t be sure sorry…

    1. Disloyal Subject

      It’s working fine on Chrome.

    2. BenRG

      Another dodgy Flash ad with badly-coded hijackware, like as not.

  76. Uniqueantique

    Sarah misses Joyce, awww.
    That’s one very big dorm room, unless Sarah is just seeing it that way because Joyce is not there ‘filling it up’ with that doofy triangle smile and huge blue eyes.

  77. Gareth

    Clearly Sarah has grown acustomed to her face

  78. CianM1301

    Aw, someone misses Joyce!

  79. Willoughby Chase

    *puts on body armour, tin helmet, goes to hide in storm shelter*

  80. Willoughby Chase

    The Fall, There’s A Ghost In My House

    https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=D0bZofM6EOU

  81. Hopeless Savage

    Why does this honestly feel like one of the saddest strips you’ve done recently? Like, I can feel Sarah’s longing for old Joyce emanating from her brightly and it’s heartbreaking because we know things don’t work like that and go back to what was considered normal.

    1. Bagge

      “That perfect girl is gone”

  82. DarkoNeko

    Hm, wow.
    I don’t want to be woken up with that. Ever.

  83. Kei

    It’s “wakey wakey, eggs and bakey”. Chicken is for dinner. And that is also how I routinely wake up my children.

    1. thejeff

      Yeah, never heard the “chicken bakey” thing.

      1. Shooxjat

        Chicken and Waffles?\

  84. Crumplepunch

    Now that you mention it this explains the luminescent blue eyes.

  85. Deanatay

    WAKEY WAKEY CHICKEN B-glk! kkgl! ghhhk!! *strangles*

    Ah, blessed silence.

  86. TheNinthShader

    Sarah might be using LSD…

  87. Solenoid

    Anyone else concerned about the story title?

    1. Alice Macher

      No more than usual. This is Dumbing of Age; it’s a given that sad things will happen in a given story. And also happy things.

      1. Spencer

        IDK the last chapter could have charitably been described as “everything is made of misery and spiders.”

        Did anyone get any kind of positive development that chapter? Hank, maybe, but then Carol more than made up for that.

        1. Silly Name

          Joe and Joyce kinda got on better terms?

        2. Spencer

          Let’s see if we can break this down.

          Amber lashed out at Danny and got another red panel out of it.

          Danny found out that his awesome superhero girlfriend is in a worse place than he thought and also we learned that he’s fine with being verbally abused. Even the hint that he was becoming more comfortable accepting his attraction to men was punctuated with him expressing that he felt unable to help Amber to Ethan.

          Walky’s keeping quiet about his grades to Dorothy and refusing to seek any kind of assistance.

          Dina revealed that she thinks she’s Becky’s rebound and not loved for who she is.

          We got the first significant hint in five years that Joe’s parents divorcing hurt him a lot more than we thought.

          Carla got misgendered and nobody did anything about it.

          Becky came back home to Mom-2 only for her to treat her like shit and blame her for everything her father did.

          Joyce’s entire worldview has been shattered.

          Literally every panel featuring Billie and Ruth.

          Well, hey, at least Sarah wasn’t any more miserable than she usually was! That’s something for this chapter!

        3. Willoughby Chase

          At least they all get out of here alive. Just.

  88. Sigurther

    Those bunkdesks are an absurdly efficient use of space. Really, those rooms only need to be wide enough to accommodate them. Really pack the students into the dorms!

    1. TheNinthShader

      It’s one of the better universities.

    2. BenRG

      The more warm bodies you can pack in, the more paying students you can have on campus and the better the quality of champaign you can serve at the Trustees’ Ball!

  89. TheNinthShader

    Plot twist, Joyce is Sarah.

  90. TheNinthShader

    Another plot twist, the entire storyline has happened inside Sarah’s head, and she’s actually in a marijuana induced coma.

    1. Spencer

      sarah was popular at school and did a marijuana and immediately died

      share if u hav a <3

  91. Heavensrun

    She haurnts ma dreeeeeeems!

  92. BenRG

    Scene that’s not going to happen: Joyce gets a ‘phone call (the caller ID being: “Sarah 🙁 “). “Joyce! I’m looonnneeelllyyy! When are you coming hooommme?“

  93. Willoughby Chase

    Look in the shallow grave.

  94. Lulu

    Is it strange that I started to dislike Sarah more from some time than even Mary?

    1. Spencer

      She’s kind of a grumpy curmudgeon who can barely be bothered to act like she actually likes the people she cares about, gets mad when people talk shit about her but first hit up a conversation with Jacob based on how much of a weird fundie Joyce was, and is occasionally just a needlessly cynical jackass.

      This is also why she’s one of my favourites. Of all the cast, she’s the best at being likable despite also being kind of horrible when she wants to be.

    2. RP

      Yes.

      1. Spencer

        Some characters just don’t work for some folks, and that’s okay.

        1. Toad

          Still strange though.

        2. Spencer

          Not really. You never hate a character as much as one you’re supposed to like, and liking the main character is like the single most fundamental building block of any work of fiction, though I’d say characters like Ruth, Sarah, Billie and the rest aren’t meant to be as unilaterally supported and loved as some other examples wherein readers get turned off to their worst actions.

          Of course we hate Mary. We’re supposed to hate Mary because Mary sucks. If we hate Mary it’s because Mary is doing her job.

  95. Akiosama

    Well, I suppose that if a photo of Becky and Joyce, or Dina can get them tagged for a comic, then a hallucinatory Joyce will allow for a tag too.

    Now I want a chicken bake, dammit. It’s like that hankerin’ for Chick-fil-A that always comes on Sunday. :p

  96. AgentKeen

    Who’s baking chicken on a Saturday morning anyhow?!?!

    1. Paul

      Chicken and Waffles is apparently a Thing. Do some people have them for breakfast?

      1. RP

        Yes, though I’ve only ever had it with chicken left over from dinner the night before.

    2. Specter177

      I always heard it as “Wakey wakey eggs and bakey (bacon).”

      1. Peduncle

        When you’re sick, it’s WHOOPIE WHOOPIE CHICKEN SOUPIE!

  97. Schol-R-LEA

    Speaking of which, does anyone else wonder if Noodle was an abducted whom SEMME missed?

    1. Schol-R-LEA

      Urk, I meant to post this in the sub-thread with the Gorillaz lyrics.

  98. wakeangel2001

    the conditioning is complete

    1. de Combys

      haha!!

  99. Tenn

    @Alt-text:
    Sarah: “I see white people.”

    1. Emperor Norton

      Joyce was white all along?

      1. Captain Button

        JOYCE was white: to begin with. There is no doubt whatever about that. This must be distinctly understood, or nothing wonderful can come of the story I am going to relate.

  100. HMRC4EVR

    I’m now picturing Joyce as a half human/ghost hybrid like Danni Phantom. Sbe runs around in a similiar outfit but calls herself the Funky Fanthom.

    Sadly she sounds nothing like SnagglePuss.

  101. chris73

    A real plot twist: Wakey wakey hands off snakey

  102. Falling Star

    But…but…
    That’s so sad!
    Why D:

  103. kaunisenkeli

    Better than the phantom wake-ups I get. Something in a dream tries to convince me (genuinely convince me) that I’ve died in my sleep, and I end up jolting awake (usually hard enough that I end up going from prone to standing next to my bed). Thankfully, this doesn’t happen often, but certainly often enough to be annoying.

  104. bryy

    The title of this new storyline is not ominous and depressing at all.

  105. Tamag21

    I really need that shot of joyce as a banner I can hang in my room.

  106. Davanin

    it’s been a while since we’ve seen that smile

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