Hank
Posted on June 26, 2013 by David M Willis

138 thoughts on “Hank”

  1. Jackson

    Hank is the giraffe? I am so confused.

    1. Undrave

      For a second I thought it was Beast Wars Neo Longrack…

  2. Tioras

    That might cause some issues with seeing while riding.

    1. Resne

      WAY TO GO, WALKERTON.

  3. otusasio451

    Well…giraffe. Why not?

  4. Kernanator

    GASP! Is there a full moon going on? Did she drink X-Tra Strength Hair Tonic?

    IS SHE SECRETLY A RABID WOLVERINE???

    1. Geminia999

      She has wolverine’s original planned backstory, the one where he isn’t a mutated person, but actually a mutated Wolverine.

    2. Jenny Creed

      Is she secretly a descendant of Samson? That’d explain both her spectacular badassness and why she doesn’t cut her hugely inconvenient hair.

    3. Ivan

      With the pace here? She hasn’t even rinsed her cooter yet!

  5. DanMan9820

    Who the hell is Hank?

    1. Mkvenner

      The giraffe.

      1. Drunken Nordmann

        There’s a giraffe?

        Oh.

    2. Dave Van Domelen

      Perhaps a hank of hair.

      1. Yotomoe

        A hank a’ hank a’ burnin’ love.

    3. Fezzam

      Hank is Joyce’s dad

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Joyce’s dad is a giraffe? No wonder she’s so messed up.

        1. desolation0

          Needing to live up to such lofty expectations.

        2. Plasma Mongoose

          Also thought her that premarital necking is wrong.

        3. Plasma Mongoose

          thought = taught

        4. NMascis

          Damn Christian girraffes!

      2. Fezzam

        And the tag is changed on me… So much for my attempt at sluthing.

    4. captainswift

      Hank is an African even-toed ungulate mammal, the tallest living terrestrial animal and the largest ruminant

      1. Zap Rowsdower

        Also kosher to eat if your shochet can find the right place on the neck to slit.

        1. Plasma Mongoose

          I would have thoght that as long as you cut the jugular, that wouldn’t matter, but who wants to have to get on a step-ladder just to slit some creature’s throat anyhow?

    5. DanMan9820

      I come back to this thread an hour later to find that Willis has changed ‘Hank’ to ‘Hank the Giraffe’.

    6. Taigan

      Real Answer: Hank the Giraffe is an advocate of safe partying at Indianna University. He has a twitter account: https://twitter.com/HankatIU

      1. Bizze

        I went to that twitter, saw that the giraffe was named Hank, then saw that the Red Panda was named Rusty, and guffawed. I bet there’s a red fox named Dean on the premises, or perhaps a Malcolm in the butterfly rooms.

        1. Patrick McGraw

          There should also be a badger named Brock.

    7. Gaiash

      As a Nerdfighter I feel it’s important to answer that question with this
      http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=bHA-Sjw7XE8

  6. Mkvenner

    Excellent follow up to yesterday.

    1. Kernanator

      Are you saying Sal’s tear ducts produce hair?

      1. Yotomoe

        Are you implying Sal is capable of crying?

      2. Mkvenner

        Now I am! 😀

      3. Plasma Mongoose

        Is this a new meme forming?

  7. Wonder Wig

    This reminds me of Pirates of Dark Water somehow.

    1. Mkvenner

      I feel very old all of a sudden.

  8. Jaqzz the Koala

    I always assumed Marcie was silent/used sign language because she was deaf, and she would read lips to communicate. Is she just mute?

    1. David

      She is only mute.

      1. Lu86

        Is it so very wrong that I assumed it was a “Catcher in the Rye” thing?

        1. Kamino Neko

          Catcher in the Rye thing?

        2. Lu86

          “I thought what I’d do was, I’d pretend I was one of those deaf-mutes. That way I wouldn’t have to have any goddam stupid useless conversations with anybody. If anybody wanted to tell me something, they’d have to write it on a piece of paper and shove it over to me. They’d get bored as hell doing that after a while, and then I’d be through with having conversations for the rest of my life. Everybody’d think I was just a poor deaf-mute bastard and they’d leave me alone.”

      2. Rin

        ahh, useful! I was coming down with the same question. In hindsight I guess ‘why we never see Sal signing, but I always figured Marcie was lipreading (no small task).

      3. Annie

        I know I’m late, but I’m so glad I found this. It’s been driving me crazy as to whether Marcie is Deaf and we just don’t see Sal sign a lot to her, whether she’s Deaf and lip reads, whether she’s deaf or hard of hearing enough that she can hear most conversations, but prefers not to voice or what.
        Every scenario had elements within the comic that were off and suggested that wasn’t quite it. When I first stumbled upon this comic (yup. I’m one of those weirdos that started with DoA. And only quite recently too.) I just assumed the little details that were off were a result of the artist not knowing these subtle things about Deaf culture and Deaf/deaf/hard-of-hearing people, but now that I’ve read all of DoA to date almost twice, all of Shortpacked, and a bit of Walky I know that just cant be the case.
        Willis, you are delightfully thorough even when it comes to little-known cultures or even randoms that you could get by with not worrying about the details. It’s one of the many, many things I love about your comics.
        But, knowing that I was back to being completely confused and completely frustrated by what Marcie’s story might be. So, even though I’d love to know more about Marcie, for now I feel satiated with this little piece of informations.

  9. Romanticide

    Nothing that can’t be fixed with some mouse , but oh well it’s her hair not mine even if it looks kinda similar.

    1. Wombat

      How much of a mouse? If a whole one, it would probably tangle things up worse as it crawls around. If part of one… well I don’t see that helping much…

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        A rat a day keeps the split-ends away. 😛

      2. andiemus

        Just the antlers.

        1. Wizard

          Exactly what kind of mouse are we talking about here?

      3. Hawkwing

        They couldn’t find a mouse, so they went for a giraffe instead. This does not end well for Hank, I’m afraid.

      4. Romanticide

        she cold get a temple mouse like those in digger and ask it to help styling it 😛

    2. hmrc4evr

      Well she won’t have to worry about it later.

      Just like the saying goes ‘hair today, gone tomorrow’

  10. Rock And Roll Martian

    Having finally consumed the host organism, Sal’s hairdo dons a motorcycle helmet to conceal its true, horrifying form.

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      That reminds me of howif the Medusa from Modest Medusa live long enough, their ‘hair’ will adsorb the medusa’s body.

      1. Not now

        I knew I was forgetting a webcomic! Since my computer bluescreened into oblivion, I lost my list of bookmarks. Thank you!

      2. Dicrel Seijin

        I must thank you. I didn’t know about Modest Medusa. I lost twenty or so minutes just clicking through from the beginning.

        1. Plasma Mongoose

          Yeah it’s a pretty good webcomic, slowly going from a gag a day to a serious more interesting story line.

        2. Roborat

          New webcomic to read! Yay!

    2. Yotomoe

      It has been known to turn men to stone. It made Jason ROCK HARD.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Sal’s hair deserves its own tag.

      2. AgentKeen

        Jason’s secret fetish: Cousin It. It’s why he and Penny didn’t last.

    3. Nono

      Sal is a Parasect?

  11. Plasma Mongoose

    I haven’t seen a giraffe in a school series since School Rumble.

    1. Yotomoe

      This schools not anime enough. Needs more toast in mouth.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        Sal has expressive hair almost like Tenma, so all it needs is comic misunderstandings and tsunderes… wait….

    2. Milosh

      What about Clone High?

      “There is NO RULE that says a giraffe can’t play football!”

  12. Aras Pabedinskas

    First Helmet I have ever seen with a moustache and eyebrows.

  13. Juliecat

    why is the giraffe apparently urinating from the center of its chest?

    1. AgentKeen

      I found a picture of the real thing, it’s actually chained down.

      (But I thought that it was poo before realizing it must be a fake giraffe)

      1. TheKelliestKelly

        Thank you! I was wondering what that was

  14. timemonkey

    Sal, ugly hair is nothing to be ashamed of, lots of characters suffer from it.

    1. Yotomoe

      Unlike Mike, who suffers from the very similar, Stupid Hair.

      1. AgentKeen

        It’s not stupid hair, it’s Escher hair.

        1. Kernanator

          His Hair Is a Friggin’ Escher Print.

  15. Doctor_Who

    She’s a Fabulous Furry Freak Brother!

  16. AgentKeen

    So Hank the Giraffe is a local Indiana thing? Any story behind it?

    1. Mathew

      You can follow him on Twitter!

      https://twitter.com/HankatIU

      He tends to advocate safe partying practices.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        He must be using a special kind of PC to be able to twitter at all.

  17. Plasma Mongoose

    At least Sal’s hair is immune to ‘helmut hair’.

  18. Geminia999

    So, is Marcie actually mute or is it just a character trait?

    1. Yotomoe

      She’s mute.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        She’s mute in the same way that Link from Zelda is.

        1. Geminia999

          So you’re saying she isn’t mute then? Cause Link can talk, he just doesn’t.

        2. timemonkey

          He does, we just don’t see/hear it.

        3. Rex Hondo

          She just grunts and hollers inarticulately a lot?

        4. xKiv

          Well, excUUUUse me, Mongoose!

  19. Shobo

    Wait, so can the girl signing hear? Did I miss that?

    1. Doctor_Who

      She’s not deaf, just mute.

    2. John

      Marcie can hear but not speak. I don’t think it’s been spelled out explicitly in the comic, but she doesn’t seem to have any trouble understanding what people are saying when she can’t see their mouths, and Willis has confirmed it.

    3. timemonkey

      Why would you assume she’s deaf? Sal’s spoken to her in every appearance.

      1. Joe

        If she was deaf, she might also be a very talented lipreader.

  20. Z3tto

    A rare instance of reverse helmet-hair.

  21. The Blot

    What’s a giraffe?

    1. Kernanator

      It’s what my parents call each other.

      Also, a mammal with a neck that must be terrible to throw up through.

      1. Plasma Mongoose

        They use their necks to blugeon each other during mating season.

        1. Yotomoe

          Nothing says kinky sex like beating someone to death with your neck.

        2. Joe

          I think it’s actually for when the males are fighting over a female.
          There are videos of it on youtube. They make this horrible slapping sound.

    2. Jenny Creed

      A miserable pile of secrets!

      1. Renadt

        Enough talk! Have at you!

        1. Jenny Creed

          Something something mankind ill needs a savior something!

  22. Kennerly

    Marcie isn’t mute. She just refuses to speak so no one will recognize the voice of Amazi-Girl!

    1. Plasma Mongoose

      That’s my canon.

      1. andmangrewproud

        Now I’m picturing an old-school sitcom with a one apartment set and a laugh track about a bunch of single twenty-somethings who sit around shipping fictional characters called “That’s My Canon!”

  23. Packy

    I wonder if Marcie and Hank were engaging in premarital hanky… eh, nah. That would be too tall a tale.

  24. Darth Cariss

    I hope for Marcie and Sal’s sake that Hank isn’t the giraffe from Resident Evil 6.

  25. vuragado

    Dat hair!

  26. Uniqueantique

    Sal and Mike have something in common. Gravity defying hair.
    A giraffe, well why not?

  27. sandbridgekid

    Hank is an aquatic, seabird, a northern aviforme, penguin analogue, now extinct. Or one -half of the Vlogbrothers.

    1. ninja_jesus

      I was gonna ask if Willis was a nerdfighter, hehe. DFTBA

  28. Steve

    I like Sal with wild hair. It helps differentiate her from the awful person she is in the other timeline…

  29. Björn

    Shobo might have assumed that Marcie got by by reading people’s lips–something that would have been plausible in previous strips, but not in this one where Sal’s hair is wearing a helmet.

    1. Björn

      Gosh darnit, that was supposed to have been a reply to one of Timemonkey’s posts above.

  30. Anonymous

    ‘Tis (the) awesome.

  31. Josh

    I mustache you a question.

    1. WebComicGeek11

      But I will Shave it for later

  32. Scott

    Am I the only one who thinks she looks the slightest bit like a Power Ranger with that helmet on? >_>

  33. FacedownNinja

    Some say she fights aliens, others say that she can bench press a truck, but chooses not to due to a pending legal battle with Ford. All we know is, she’s called The Sal.

  34. hmrc4evr

    I’ll be the first to call it–

    Hank is Amazi-Girl!! See it’s the perfect disguise; not only does he change size and gender he changes species..and from an inanimate object to a living creature!

    Last one is tricky–someone needs to blink first.

  35. Dr.Midnight

    Does Hank the Giraffe move around? Because in the Google images I found he seems to be in several different locations…

    1. Ben

      Yeah, he does. He likes to visit special events like orientation and such.

  36. Animal

    Is it just me, or is the giraffe… leaking?

    1. Ben

      He’s chained down because he was stolen on more than one occasion.

      1. Neospector

        They make chains out of water now?
        Does that mean I can be an earth bender?

  37. Ben

    Just thought I’d throw this in here in case anyone was wondering: http://streetsmart.indiana.edu/

    1. begbert2

      Wait, he finds Larry the Cable Guy inspirational? Hank is now dead to me.

  38. Hermitix

    Isn’t this… Kind of the same joke again?

    1. Kernanator

      No, see, the hair is now POPPING OUT OF HER HELMET.

      Also, there is a giraffe. Giraffes make things 20 times funnier. This is a fact.

  39. Kitty

    I’m….I’m so confused! Save us Hank save us from the wtf!

  40. LuckyStar7

    I FEEL YOU, WALKERTON.

    1. xKiv

      Way to go, Walkerton.

  41. Jingah

    I didn’t notice the giraffe until I read the alt text. derp

  42. Sir Robin

    I guess the hair signifies one thing …

    http://youtu.be/lQlIhraqL7o

  43. QuantumPolagnus

    Is the giraffe peeing?

  44. Pseudowolf

    This giraffe. Is it, perchance, steam powered? (Google it now, thank me later)

  45. xKiv

    So today we learn … Hank’s in Hennessy?

  46. LtSaraD

    i know that feels!

  47. Brady Kj

    But her hair’s awesome! Why is she hiding it? Why do so many people have contempt for curly hair that sticks out everywhere? And why is it most common among people who claim to want to be attractive, when their bizarre hair-straightening ritual proves they don’t?

  48. Vree

    Sal: “Okay, I admit it. Your ride is cooler.”

  49. Nathan

    Fix it! I can’t deal with Sal’s hair like this!

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